James Gordon sighed as his daughter walked in. Today wasn't going to be easy. Right now, he was going to make a life-altering decision that would probably affect his relationship with his daughter in the foreseeable future. "Hi, Dad. School was great. Can't chat. Need to look up-"
"Babs, we need to have a talk." He spoke seriously. She wouldn't like what he had to say… but he needed to follow through with it... he needed to keep his promise. It was the most important promise he could make, even more so than the badge he wore on his chest.
"… Dad, if it's about me getting addicted to my medication, I told you I stopped taking that stuff." It was... rough when Eileen died. It had been rough for everyone… he didn't want his daughter on medication when she needed to properly process her grief. And… while there was a small adjustment period to get through, it was nice to see his daughter's bottomless enthusiasm again. That had been a rarity ever since Barbara's little friend disappeared.
"It's not that." He shook his head. "Sit down, have a muffin." Jim offered his daughter.
"Ooooh, baked goods." She smiled, walking up and munching them down. "Oooh, are these homemade? SOOO good, super fluffy and warm and light and full of chocolate chips in the shape of bats!" Even his daughter's endless love for Batman felt like a bright spot in his life.
"Barbara… you remember that day you came home with Ratcatcher?" He asked.
"Which time? The first one or the second one that's disappeared and has been swearing vengeance for the last ten years?" Barbara asked as she stuffed her face full of pastries.
"First one."
"Course I do. It's the day I met Iruma." She smiled, biting into a muffin. "Like I'd ever forget the day I met my second BFFEAEAEAE! What? Did you think just because he disappeared, I'd repress those memories and completely shut myself off from all emotions so that I'm a cold and unfeeling person who constantly tries to shield myself from emotional pain?" Barbara managed to ask with one breath. "HA! That's crazy. I'd never do that."
"… Right." Jim nodded. "Well, before you came home, I made a promise to your mother."
"Dad, I don't think you should shave your mustache." Barbara nodded. "It's too iconic for you to change your looks by now."
"No... no, it was bigger than that." He corrected her.
Barbara stared at him for a moment before her eyes widened. "Ooooh... I understand." She nodded.
He blinked. "You do?"
"Yes, and I support her decision fully."
"You do?" He asked skeptically.
"Yeah, I mean, it's been a few years since she passed. If you feel it's alright to get back in the dating game, I can introduce you to a few sites that like guys with white hair-"
"Barbara, this is about moving out of Gotham." He said as bluntly as possible to get her to stop. Dating was not something he had on his mind, and the less he thought about it, the better.
"Ooooh …" She stared at him for a moment, then stood up. "Well, this is clearly a dream, so I'm gonna go fly off the roof!"
"Ugh…" Jim sighed as he grabbed her by her hoodie. "I promised your mother that I would get you out of Gotham in exactly ten years, and it's that time, Pumpkin. I've already sent the transfer papers. You'll be enrolled in Metropolis High within the week."
"Dad!" His daughter shouted. "You can't do this! Metropolis, really!? That city's like the opposite of Gotham!"
"That's exactly why we're moving," Jim explained. "Gotham is no place to raise a child, and if it wasn't for my prior duties as the commissioner, I would've taken you out of it sooner."
"But Gotham has lovely activities for kids! Identifying bodies, recycling broken glass shards, making shapes out of the polluted skies." Barbara argued with several MORE points as to why leaving Gotham was a good idea. "We can't leave, Dad! What about Harley? Our memories? Your rocky but solid relationship with Batman?"
"Pumpkin, I'm nearing retirement as it is." He sighed. "Batman doesn't need an old man just to tell him what crimes are in progress." At this point, all he was doing was lighting the bat signal. Anybody could do that.
"ALL superheroes need an old man telling them what to do. They need guys in the chair. It's how they keep their heads straight and narrow!"
"Barbara, it's Batman. He has plenty of help already," he reassured.
"If you're talking about that new Robin, then I'm not very reassured. The guy's a big jerk." Barbara muttered bitterly.
"He has a system, trust me." The man waved off. "And my replacement will do just fine."
"… Dad, tell me you did NOT make Harvey commissioner."
"I love the man, but I'm not THAT in love with him." He chuckled. "Believe me, I got someone that'll do just fine."
"Oh, thank god." She sighed in relief. "But I still don't want to go!" She gave him the beady eyes. "I promise to get an A on my next test! B! B minus for sure if I push it, I can keep it up!"
"Honey, I trust the Gotham Board of Education about as much as I can throw it… plus, the school counselor gives me the creeps." His last name was LITERALLY strange. "In Metropolis, you're guaranteed to get a better education, hands down."
"But what if... What if… What if Iruma-!"
"Barbara... I'm hoping your friend shows up again, too... but the chances of that are slim to none, honey." He shook his head. "It's been seven years. If he hasn't come back by now …"
"He's NOT dead-!"
"I never said he was dead... it's just unlikely he's going to come back here." Jim lamented. "I'm sorry honey, I know you want to save him... but we both know that if he hasn't come back in seven years …"
"... just because it's highly unlikely doesn't mean it can't happen!" Barbara argued.
"I know, but we can't wait around when there's a whole world outside of Gotham." Jim sighed. "Look, you're 16, and in a few years, you'll go off to college and be able to make the choice between Gotham and anywhere else." He hoped to God that she'd choose anywhere else. "Just.. give it a chance, and then you can come back if you want to."
"..." She sighed. "Alright... alright." Babs relented, slumping into the chair. "I'll go."
"Great! You better get started packing. The moving van will be here in two days." He smiled as he hugged the girl. "I promise you that everything will work out. You're going to love it in Metropolis."
"I highly doubt it."
Diana smiled as she saw land on the horizon. "Finally... I have arrived at the peak of man's world!" Truly a sight to behold... and a destiny to be grabbed.
Sure, Mother may have forbidden her from ever leaving the island... but she ALSO taught her that some rules must be broken for the sake of good. She may be only three hundred and seventy years old, but she couldn't just sit back at home forever. She needed to make her own way, even if she was a mere teenager.
So far, the journey has been rather standard. She fought two giant squids and a Kraken on the way over and had to endure Poseidon's wrath in the form of a whirlpool, but it was nothing she hadn't trained for her entire life. She hadn't seen men, though, or even another woman so far. She was certain that there should've been other fellow travelers exploring the world of man. How else would man be able to get around without Zeus's gift of flight, which he granted to so few?
Diana would focus on that later. For now, she needed to pull her boat onto shore, which meant having to deal with one of Poseidon's most difficult and irritating obstacles: seaweed. "Begone foul weeds! You can not overcome the might of an Amazon!" She exclaimed, driving her sword into the evil plants. "If you think this is enough to stir me from my path, then you are sorely mistaken!"
The weeds were proving to be harder to deal with than usual. They might be magic, in which case she must deal with them using nature's original method: devouring the substance! Diana began chomping down on the weeds, devouring their energy for herself. They were slimy yet tough, but that wouldn't stop her one bit-!
"Oh, excuse me." Diana turned her head, noticing what looked like a short, blue-haired young woman of oriental nature walking up to her. "I've been at sea for a while, and I ran out of rations. Would it bother you if I had some of your seaweed?"
"Not at all, fellow traveler." She smiled. "They were bothering my vessel, so I found it fit to devour the weeds myself. But they are proving..." Diana tried taking a bite, only managing to get a morsel. "...Quite difficult to deal with!"
"It's like eating a ball of yarn. First, you have to find the weakest strands and eat them first. Like this." The blue-haired girl pointed to a large section of entangled seaweed-
CHOMP
And devoured it completely as if it wasn't there. "Wow, you have the most impressive appetite." Diana smiled. "It reminds me of home." Her aunt Antiope had a similar appetite, which, even by Amazon standards, was beyond what most could seemingly handle all at once.
"Oh, did you grow up in Gotham too?" The blue-haired girl asked. "That's how I learned to survive on anything most people considered 'inedible'. I mean, as long as you can put it in your mouth and swallow, it's edible."
"No, I have never heard of Gotham." She shook her head. "I am Diana! Princess of the Amazons! I have come to learn of the world of man!" She exclaimed.
"... Not that much different from the world of women. Just less skirts." The girl shrugged.
"Be that as it may, I have ventured from my home to learn all that I can so that I may protect and serve those in need and punish those who seek to cause harm!"
"Ooooh, so you're a superhero?"
"I am a champion of peace and truth for all, a warrior of liberation, and a soldier for freedom and justice!"
"... Superhero without a costume, nice." The blue-haired girl nodded. "Well, I wish you the best of luck."
"Thank you, female of the modern world!" She exclaimed.
The blue-haired girl blinked in confusion, looking like she was about to say something… only to shrug. "... You're welcome."
"Now then, onto shore!" She jumped onto the beach. "And let us experience what wonders man's world has to offer!"
"Hey there." Diana turned... seeing what could only be described as beauty. "Enjoying the early Metropolis morning beach sun?" The… chiseled hunk of flesh that could in no way be human waved at her.
"Aaaaaahhhh …" So powerful, her words couldn't even form.
"Kind of. I just came on the tide, as did…" The blue-haired girl looked at her. "Diana, I think it was? That's your name, right?"
"Di-di-di-di, yes, yes, very much so. Diana is my designated name, yes, from birth." She managed to get out.
"Nice to meet you, Diana, and kid with pointy hair." The… the thing of beauty greeted her…greeted Diana of all people…
"Yes, yes, very, very well to greet you-meet you, meet, yes, that's what I meant!" Diana helped out her hand. "And… and... Are... are you perhaps… a man of man's world?"
"That's a funny way of saying it, but yes, last time I checked." The beautiful creature nodded as he... he touched her hand... flesh meeting flesh... warmth sharing warmth, twisting and caressing each other in a beautiful binding. "I'm Steve Trevor."
"Steeeve Treeeevorrrrr." She nodded, rolling out the melody. "What a lovely name."
"Thanks, my mom gave it to me." He smiled. "Anyway, gotta head to school. Later." The man waved as he walked away, hips swaying as he left her vision.
"He has a mom… I have a mom… we have so much in common!" Diana blushed as she felt her legs weaken, stumbling to the sand. "It's like destiny struck me twofold this very day!"
"...Well, I mean, I barely know my own parents, so I guess that's not unreasonable to get excited over." The blue-haired girl mumbled, staring down at her. "Are you alright?"
"Yes... it's just... that's my first time seeing... a man …" So dreamy... so precious …
"Seriously, is it my voice? I swore puberty would've hit me by now..." The blue-haired girl muttered. "Anyway, I need to enroll in a school too. It's nice meeting you, Diana."
"Nice meeting you too, woman of the modern world of man." Diana shook herself, clearing her mind… in spite of how much she didn't want to. It was time to focus on her mission to save the world of man! Everyone seemed to be heading to this 'schoooal'... it must be a place of great and powerful importance!
"School is always the worst," Barbara grumbled as she got out of the car, gazing up at the building. "Metropolis High… it doesn't have nearly as much personality as Gotham High does."
"Barbara, Gotham High had ten broken windows that were never fixed and graffiti all over the place." Dad reminded her.
"Exactly, there was personality in that school. What's the personality of THIS dump!?" Barbara called out as she pointed to the mascot. "A hamster? Really!? What kind of lame mascot is a hamster!? It's like they're not even trying to inspire people!" Said mascot slumped, trudging away as sad music was played by a band kid.
"Do I need to remind you to never judge a book by its cover?"
"Right, right, rules of a cop." She rolled her eyes. "It's just-"
"So lame!" She turned her head to see a blonde girl arguing with two adults in a car.
"Now Kara, we all know you could use some more friends." The probable dad said gently.
"You're not the boss of me, Jerimiah!" The girl screamed. "I was perfectly fine back in Smallville! I don't need to move here of all places."
"We HEAR that you're uncomfortable, and we only ask that you give it a chance." What Barbara was now only fifty percent sure was the girl's mother calmly responded.
"Gah, this is the-" The blonde grabbed the car door. "Worst!"
Crunch
… And slammed it with enough force to leave dented metal and cracked windows. "... Sweetie?" Dad asked. "You alright?"
"Yeah, yeah, love you too, Dad." Barbara idly waved off, staring as the girl walked away. "Weird…" Was that… super strength? She'd seen some cases of it in Gotham, mostly from people like Bane, but never so brazenly. Did she go to school with a SUPERHERO now?!
She then saw a purple haired girl walking out of a limo... rich girl, probably some sort of stereotype of flaunting wealth... "Sweetie, you forgot your bag!" Shouted a man, holding up a bookbag.
"Thanks, Dad!" The purple-haired girl shouted back, holding up the same bag. Wait, what?
She looked back to see the limo, the oversized vehicle... completely missing out of sight. "... Teleportation …" Either that or she accidentally took her ADHD pills again, but that couldn't be happening… she made sure to flush them all down the drain the second her dad stopped trying to force her to take them.
"Weird, very weird." What was going on here? It was like she stepped into the Twilight Zone or something... which meant she just stepped into a dimension of AWESOMENESS-
Crash
Barbara found her colliding with another girl, this one likely being a year or two younger given her shorter stature, with curly hair, an oversized yellow striped sweater, and a gym bag full of… doohickies and scrap metal. "Sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry!" The girl repeated over and over again as she scrambled to pick the scrap metal up.
Barbara blinked. The bits of images she saw showed the doohickies in question were a lot more advanced than what she worked on. And Barbara invented a batcomputer! Maybe she should calmly and quietly greet her. "Hey! My name's Babs! Your stuff looks really, really, really cool and high-tech! Are you some kind of super genius? Because I'm kind of a genius. 'Cause I mean, I like focusing on martial arts training a little more, but I also tinker and toy and mess with gadgets a lot and-!"
"Too much interaction!" The girl screamed, running off.
"... She seems nice." Super strength, teleportation, high-end scientists. What next, secret alien order?
"Hal, I told you for the last time, I don't believe in the Green Lantern's cause." A girl in what looked like a green robe argued with a hunky-faced guy as Barbara walked through the school hallway. "So just take back the ring-"
"Sorry, Jess, but that's not how that works." The hunky-faced guy pushed some glowing green ring back. "It chose you, and whether you like it or not, it's yours."
"... Okay, I'm gonna apologize to Dad later." Cause he sent her to a SUPERHERO SCHOOL! EEEEEHHHH!
Okay, okay, okay, now she needed to find a way to get them all contained in one room and reveal their superpowers, then they could be a super team and save the day and go on cool adventures and- "What electives should I take …"
"...No way…" That voice… "No way, no way, no way…" She had heard that voice ingrained in her brain for a DECADE by this point. Barbara would recognize it anywhere, but there's no way it would be here. Would it be? Why would he be in a school? Why would he want to be in a school?!
Barbara turned her head around and desperately looked for the source of the voice. Was she going crazy? Was this school messing with her head? Was she so happy she passed out and heard things? "Please don't be an illusion, please don't be an illusion, for the love of Batman, don't be an illusion!"
"Home ec?" she heard the voice call out again as she turned to the source—the source with blue hair and a cowlick, with wide, baby-innocent eyes that didn't seem to age a day. "They actually grade you on making stuff you eat. Sign me up!"
"Iruma?" She asked quietly, a squeak of desperation and hope in her voice.
The boy, the short, adorable boy she had hoped this person was, titled their head, blinking before smiling. "Barbara?" He asked, surprised... He was there... He was …
"IRUMA!" She ran up to him.
"Barbara, wait! Too fast, too-"
SMACK
The two of them slammed into the locker. "I'M SO GLAD YOU'RE ALRIGHT!" She squeezed him tightly. "YOU'RE OKAY! YOU'RE OKAY! YOU'RE ACTUALLY ALIVE AND OKAY!"
"Yep… very okay…" Iruma, her Iruma, gasped out as she patted his back. "You… you definitely got… stronger since the last time we saw each other…"
"You're alright and safe!" She screamed out, ignoring the looks everyone was giving them. They didn't matter.
"I am …"
"Iruma, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm so, so, so, so, so, so SOOORRRRY! I should've done something to make you stay. I should've followed you. I should've kept that tracking device in your hair, followed every step, and kept track of your sleep schedule!"
"Should I call nine-one-one?" The blonde girl from earlier asked.
"Oh, hey, Kara." Iruma waved weakly. "At least I think it's you. Hard to tell when my head is ringing... I thought you didn't live in Metropolis."
"Parents moved me here to come to school." She groaned.
"Wait …" Barbra blinked. "You two know each other? Are you friends?" Did he make more friends while he was gone?
"More like a well-known acquaintance." The tall girl that Barbra suspected of having super strength shrugged. "Ran into Bluey here for the better part of a year, like… four years ago before he just upped and vanished."
"Wait, you didn't live here while you were on the-"
"You're new here, Barbara, and so am I. Let's get our class schedules!" Iruma chuckled as he pushed her into the hallway. "Hehehe, I know you're happy, but can we Xnay on the run-aye?"
"That's not how Pig Latin works, but okay, sorry, I'm just so happy to see you!" Barbara squeezed him. "I… I thought I'd never see you again."
"...I missed you too." Iruma hugged her gently. "Not a day went by that I didn't think about you guys… about Gotham…It wasn't the perfect life… but it was a life I loved having with you."
Barbara wiped a tear. "Oooh, I gotta tell Harley! She's gonna rush right over!"
"Wait, wait... did YOU move out of Gotham?" Iruma asked in shock.
"Not willingly, but that doesn't matter now because you're here, and then I'll get our other Bestie here, and oh man, there's still so much I need to know 'cause after you left, I didn't know where to find you or how to find you and I never knew whether or not or…" She hugged him again, squeezing him even tighter to double-check that he was really here and not an illusion. "Are you safe... are you happy?" She asked.
"It was hard… but… I am happy, Barbara." Iruma nodded. I learned stuff on my travels, some good… some not so good… but... But I'm back, and I'm here to stay." He grinned. "I got an ID and everything, so now everyone won't just call me a Chinese immigrant anymore, which is inaccurate considering I'm Japanese."
"Coooool." She nodded with a smile. "So, where did you go?"
… Iruma smirked at her. "Secret."
"Come one, don't be like that!" Barbara shook him. "Tell me, tell me now!"
"I will tell you... In my own time." He cheekily smiled at her.
"Booo." Barbara pouted before laughing. "No matter, today marks a new chapter for the both of us! It's a brand new dawn for Barbara Gordon and Iruma!"
"Suzuki." He added.
"Huh?" Barbra blinked.
"Iruma Suzuki, that's my full name." He said.
"... Did you get adopted?" She asked. "Wait, did you meet your family!?"
"Yes." He nodded as he began walking.
"... Yes, to what exactly?"
"Just yes."
"… Laame.." she pouted. "That's so lame."
"Barbara, you know that when it comes to me... I have no concept of what most consider cool." Iruma pointed to a group of kids with green goggles on. "I mean, does that really scream cool to you?"
"A VR headset? Kind of." Barbara argued. "It's like playing video games with your mind!"
"... Seven years traveling, and I still don't comprehend people." He smiled.
"That's my Iruma." Barbara hugged him even tighter still. "Don't ever change… Don't ever change lruma."
Iruma found Barbara... he found his BFFEAEAEAE... they were reunited in his new home... today was already turning out swell. He wasn't sure what to expect when enrolling in a school. The principal, surprisingly, didn't ask any questions about it, actually seeming more bored and dismissive with it than anything. Harley always said teachers were dumb, but he didn't know how literally to take it before now.
All he needed was credits and tuition money. Apparently, public schooling was supposed to be free, but the money went to the school's 'fix up a supervillain attack' budget, which was, as it were, 'low enough that it actually justifies how little teachers get paid'. That didn't sound right to Iruma, but it wasn't like he wasn't going to have any less excuses to not get a job sooner or later in his life, and it wasn't like he was going to just rely on Tatsu's help forever, she needed to spread her own wings.
Speaking of wings… "Wow, you got a C + on your first math assignment." Barbara looked over his paper for said assignment. "Which is super weird since these are both our first days." Who sends out assignments AND expects them to have grades on the first day? Even the gorillas weren't that studious.
"Eh, I've learned how to be a little crafty here and there, and apparently, building an air conditioner is easier when you understand mass, volume, and circumstance." Iruma shrugged.
"Seriously, Iruma, you can't leave me hanging after seven years. You gotta give me something to latch on to!" Barbara shook his arm as they got into the lunch line.
"I absolutely can." He smirked. "Cause you have no leads on who I know and who I don't."
"Hey, Iruma." A familiar face walked by with a tray of tater tots. "Nice to see ya up top."
"Oh, hey, Garth." Iruma waved off-handedly to the Atlantean boy. Huh, guess Garth was serious about attending school here. Hope the lack of water around the room won't be a problem. "Your family got everything settled?"
"Just about. The only concern they have is if I'm wearing enough sunscreen at all times. They think any time I'm out in the open, I'm about to become a side order of fish and chips." Garth laughed off... before sliding on a wet floor sign and into a locker. "Not again!"
"... He'll be fine." Iruma nodded. Atlantean biology was tough.
"Now, that's two friends you've made in your time away that I don't know about!" Barbara shook him some more as they got their food, Iruma piling on two of everything. "You have to tell me more, or I'll blow up in anticipation and excitement!"
"Or you'll blow up from that chemical mixture you left uncontained." Iruma deadpanned.
"How would you know if I had a chemical mixture or not?" Barbara smirked. "Did you pick up detective skills on your trip?"
"No, your bag is smoking." He pointed to her bag.
"Aw, what? My smoke bombs!" She opened the bag and got a cloud of smoke on her face. "Great, now I gotta make more before I go on patrol."
"You go on patrols now?" Iruma asked, blinking in shock. "Did you finally become Batman's sidekick?"
"You wanna tell me your secrets?" She asked back.
"I'll take that as a no, then." Iruma chuckled.
"Hey... I could've become Batman's sidekick while you were gone." She pouted.
"If you did, you would still be in Gotham in spite of what your dad said." If there was one thing he noticed that didn't change, it was Barbara's love of Batman.
"Well, did YOU become a sidekick?" She asked.
"Not particularly, no." He was pretty sure he was more of a 'goon' than a sidekick. "I just worked for a lot of people over the years. I even managed to travel to Japan at one point." He figured that one was obvious, given he was Japanese.
"Oooh, is that where you met your family!?" She called out, almost spilling her tray of food.
"Something like that." He steadied the tray. "And that's all I'm gonna say on-" He paused, his eyes seeing someone focusing on a mirror. "Is that Oliver Queen?" Iruma asked out loud.
"The billionaire boy that crashed on an island for a year, yeah." Barbara nodded. "Did you meet him or something while you were gone?"
"...Or something." Lian Yu might've been his most productive year away, but it was by far the WORST, worse than dealing with Trigon the Terrible, or even... the bastard who won't be named. "Let's just say I spent a whole year camping." And hunting and training and almost getting killed by an immortal assassin. "But enough about me."
"Hardly, you barely said anything about you!"
"What have you and Harley been up to?" Iruma asked curiously.
"Oh, you know, laughing, loving, ignoring the gaping void in our hearts as we cry over everyone leaving us." Barbara shrugged. "You know, regular Gotham stuff. Harley and Pamela Isley started hanging out together more, making my training schedule easier." Barbara nodded, though there was a hint of sadness. "I.. took ADHD meds to keep my brain from wandering too long on it.. on you from leaving."
"… I'm sorry …" He hugged the girl. "I didn't mean to leave you guys so miserable. I... I..."
"Sssh.. you don't have to bring it up. That's in the past." Barbara smiled. "Now we have seven years of BFFEAEAEAE time to make up for!"
"Yeah, we do!" He exclaimed. "Let's start with-"
"Oh, hey, Iruma." A familiar face rushed by.
"Hey, Barry." He greeted back before blinking. "Didn't you live in Central City?"
He came back. "Yeah, but I got a scholarship. Win for me!" The boy shouted before running back off.
Why was everyone he met in his life suddenly going to the same school? Next thing you knew, Amanda Waller was going to be right around the corner. "Weird," Iruma muttered as he began eating.
"Tell me about it, Iruma. We go to a school full of superheroes!" Barbara squeezed with a loud whisper. "That girl over there-!" She pointed over to a shy-looking girl in a yellow and black sweater. "Is some kind of super tech genius with some kind of super suit! That girl-!" She pointed over to Kara. "Has super strength, enough to move a car! And that girl!" She pointed over to someone with purple hair that rang familiar. "Can teleport!"
"I think she's magic." He noted that he had an odd recollection of a magic show.
"Magic's not real. It's all tricks and tech-"
"The last seven years would highly disagree with you," Iruma noted.
"And that girl-!" Barbara either didn't hear him or ignored him. "... actually I don't know her deal, but she has some kind of green ring, and she was talking to a hunky-faced guy about a corp, which means fighting, which means she's a superhero!"
"How young do the Lanterns recruit?" Iruma muttered in confusion.
"You know them?" She asked.
"Of them, I only met one a while back. Aliens who use rings and willpower to do anything."
"… That is SO Coool!" Barbara shook him again. "You know what we should do, right?" She asked.
"Respect their privacy?"
"No, corner them into confessing in a room together and become a team of crime fighters!"
"That seems really mean and underhanded," Iruma noted. "I know secret identities are easy to figure out, but you shouldn't just expose them publicly." Just because no one figured out that the glasses guy at the Daily Planet was Superman didn't mean he should tell everyone about it.
"That's why I said we're going to corner them privately." Barbara grinned as she glanced at Kara before grabbing a handful of mashed potatoes.
"Ooh, you're going to share your food to become their friend?"
"Something like that." She nodded... before tossing them at the girl.
"Nooooo!" Iruma cried out as the food hit the girl on the back of the head.
"Quick, get down!" Barbara pulled him under the table.
"Hey!" Kara shouted, looking around. "Who threw that-!?" Her gaze locked onto the tiny girl in the yellow sweater… who was eating mashed potatoes.
"Barbara, she's going to assume she threw them-!" Barbara covered his mouth.
"Exactly." She smiled mischievously.
Kara lifted her tray and chucked it at the girl in the sweater, who ducked with a shriek... as it hit the purple haired girl. "Ah! You brute!" The girl got a plate full of spaghetti… which landed on the girl Barbara described as a Green Lantern.
"...All that food… wasted…" Iruma sniffed.
"Don't worry, Iruma, it's going to be a good cause… FOOOD FIGHT!" Barbara jumped on the table, screaming as she tossed her own plate, and before you knew it, the entire lunchroom was being flooded by gravy, ketchup, applesauce, and every other manner of food you could think of.
"Barbara!" He reprimanded in horrid despair. "How could you!?"
"Like I said, a good-"
"If you're going to fight, don't waste food! Just throw knives and forks instead!" Wasting food: the number one cause of misery in his life. "You knock more people out with metal than you do with pudding."
"...Oh, I've missed the combo of concern and pride I feel whenever you talk." Barbara hugged him as a pie landed on her face. "It's just like old times."
"...It really is." He sighed with a small smile. "But we can't walk down memory lane now. We have food to save!" So many lost meals.
"Don't worry, we just need a teacher to come in and bust the whole thing up." She grinned.
"Yeah, you do that. I'm going to save as much food as I can!" He shouted, jumping up in the air and eating as much as he could catch. On the upside of this, it was only his first day of school, and he was already getting his money's worth of food for attending. Lucky him.
He continued to eat whatever food he could find, be it in the air or on the ground. This was almost as good as the buffet Lori would give him every morning in Atlantis. Continuing to eat, he saw Kara and the purple girl who seemed really familiar lead two factions of the food fight, and the girl in green trying to stop the two from fighting. "Violence is never the answer!" The probable Green Lantern shouted, using a tray as a shield to smack food away from herself and the tiny girl.
"Yeah!" The tiny girl shouted, getting on her knees and trying to scoot out of the way. "The answer is to run away!" Guess she was full then... Iruma still didn't quite get that.
"Hahaha. Then you're living on the wrong planet!" Kara cackled as she began rapidly firing food at what most would consider superhuman speed, the chaos of the whole school fighting preventing people from actually paying attention to said fact.
"You got my shirt stained!" The purple-haired girl screamed, running forward, and she tackled the blonde with her bare hands.
"And your face is next!" Kara shouted as she got a really, REALLY nice juicy burger ready to be thrown...a really… REALLY juicy burger… one that was about to be wasted as cannon fodder in a pointless and wasteful fight.
"No, wait!" He snatched the food out of her hands. "Don't let the food go to waste!"
"What- Hey, that's my ammo-!" Kara was knocked back with a tray full of meatballs into her face by the purple-haired girl, stumbling onto the ground.
"Thanks for that-" The tall girl with dark purple hair looked at him curiously. "...You look… familiar."
"Yeah, same." Iruma narrowed his eyes… he did his best to improve his memory, but time often got the best of things… still, the purple hair sparked something… glittery... "Have you been to-?"
"Oh, you're going to pay for that!" Kara shouted as she quickly leaped at him. Iruma's instincts quickly took over and avoided her, but the purple-haired girl got pushed to the ground instead.
The two of them spiraled over into the yellow-sweater girl. "Hey, back it up!" The green girl shouted while tackling both of them.
"Jess, are you alright-ahhh, don't come towards me don't come towards me!" The tiny girl shrieked as she was pulled in the pile that was forming.
"Yes, my plan's working!" Barbara shouted as she jumped right in. "CANNONBALL!"
"Barbara, no, you're just making it worse!" He tried to grab on... Only to get pulled in himself. "GAHHH! BAD IDEA, REALLY BAD IDEA!" He screamed as he had to now both eat the food coming his way and dodge all the punching and kicking.
Okay, Iruma, you've crawled out of tighter spots before. Just reach and pull before the door slammed open, as in came the principal himself. "Who is responsible for all this!?" He shouted.
The fighting and food throwing instantly stopped as all the students instantly pointed… to him and the pile of fighting girls he had just gotten in the middle of. He saw the smile on Barbara's face. "You know this is a Harley move, right?"
"I learned from the best." She grinned without a hint of shame.
"All of you, detention!" First day of school, and he had detention… he wasn't sure if the small feeling of excitement he had for such a new experience was a good thing.
Zee grumbled as she stared at the board, waiting for this miserable experience to be over. Detention... on the first day of school... Daddy was gonna love this one. "I blame you for this." She shot to the blonde brute. "I hope you have a good attorney."
"What, you're going to sue me for having a better aim than you?" The brute rolled her eyes lazily as she placed her feet up on her desk. "Oh, I'm so scared."
"This shirt alone costs more than your entire wardrobe, you know because some of us can afford to look fashionable." She snarked.
"Is it really worth it to sue someone over a shirt?" The Japanese boy with the strangely familiar cute face asked. "Wouldn't the cost of lawyers alone ruin any monetary gain you'd want?"
"It's about the principle of the matter, cutie. Some things are worth the money."
The blonde girl snorted. "At least I don't immediately crush on the guy who has to come to my rescue."
"It's called being polite and feminine, two things you clearly have no idea about." Zee rolled her eyes as she began filing her nails.
"Why you-!"
"Honestly, would it kill the both of you to stop fighting?" The tall girl in green spoke all zealously and self-righteously. "You're intimidating poor Karen."
"I-I just-just want to let it be said that-that I apologize if-if I've offended anyone here..." The tiny girl in the oversized sweater spoke out quietly, looking like she wanted to disappear from the conversation altogether.
"If anything, you're the only one that hasn't offended anybody." The familiar cute boy noted. "You're the only one here that didn't throw and waste food… so much precious food… down the drain... " The boy gripped his desk. "All… all gone to waste…"
"There, there, Iruma." The red-headed girl in the purple hoodie patted his back sympathetically. "I promise this will all be worth it."
"Don't think I'm not blaming you." The boy glared. "You did all this to invade privacy and form a superhero team I was against."
"... She WHAT!?" Everyone screamed in both surprise and exasperation at the redhead.
"Come on, it's a superhero hero team. Who would turn something like that down!?" The redhead shrieked as everyone raised their hands. "Oh, come on, really?"
"Yes, really." Zee rolled her eyes.
"Not to mention... none of us are superheroes!" The green girl shouted. "We are all perfectly normal, average, non-violent people."
"Ye-yes, that's me." The small girl said. "Just a normal, everyday, average girl."
"I don't do teams." The brute crossed her arms.
"Come on, I saw all of you use your powers and stuff, or at least heard all of you talking about it-"
"Oh, so you're a jerk AND a stalker. Just keep piling it on, sweetie." Zee glared.
"Hey!" The redhead shouted. "… I'm a stalker only."
"You're not helping your case, Babs." The cute, familiar boy slapped his forehead. "No one in their right mind is going to jump at the chance to join a team on the spot."
At that moment, the principal came back into the room with a tall figure shrouded in a large oversized hood. "Skipping class on the first day… this year is full of nothing but delinquents." The man muttered bitterly as he slammed the door behind him.
The red-headed girl grinned, poking the boy's face. "That doesn't disprove my point. She's just a random girl that entered the room-" And the hooded figure uncloaked herself… revealing… someone… very... Very stunning and eloquent. "Oh, it's you."
The 'you' in question was a six-foot beauty of a girl with long, flowing, and luscious black hair, flawlessly tan skin, and eyes that were perfectly sapphire blue, clothed in armor that left very little to the imagination. Said armor was covering a flawless, hourglass figure filled with condensed muscles that screamed both elegance and power. Honestly, her mere presence was making Zee both feel self-conscious and feel things that left her questioning her sexuality. "Whoa…" The tall girl in green blinked in awe.
"She's…" The tiny girl had her mouth open.
"Hot." The red-headed girl completed with eyes sparkling with a wonder that Zee often saw in the people in the audience of her magic act.
"Greetings, ladies of the modern world of man. I am Princess Diana, an Amazonian warrior and the chosen champion of Zeus himself to fight for the world of man!" The tall stunner of a girl proclaimed proudly.
"... Does this school just have some kind of magnet for strange people?" The strangely familiar cute boy tilted his head.
"I may need to double-check if it's hexed." Zee nodded.
"Pfft, so you got fancy Xena cosplay armor, big deal." The blonde brute rolled her eyes, somehow unimpressed by the beauty of the girl.
"… I'm confused." The girl tilted her head. "My armor was forged by the god Hephaestus . Who is this 'Xena Cosplay' you speak of?"
"I think she's being serious." The tiny girl spoke up.
"That's what she told me when I met her on the beach." The familiar cute boy nodded.
"Wait, you were traveling by sea?" The redhead asked curiously.
"Ah, hello again, kind and hungry traveler. A pleasure to meet you again." The woman bowed.
"Oh, cut the bit already. The redhead has already pissed me off too much already. I'm not in the mood for playing make-believe." The brute grumbled.
The stunner of a girl, Diana apparently, glared. "My noble quest is not fantasy but a dream I wish to make a reality, and I do not take kindly to those that wish to make jest of my mission."
"Oooh, oh, you really want to do this, 'princess'?" The brute stood up with a challenging grin. "Trust me, you don't want to fight me… cause you'd lose in an instant."
"Hey, how about we all calm down?" The boy got in between them.
"He's right." The green girl added. "We can settle this with a peaceful and reasonable discussion-"
"Very well, I accept your request for a spar." The Amazonian beauty bowed. "You may take the first strike if you so please."
"Ooh, you sure? You may not like what happens next." The brute began cracking her knuckles.
"I accept anything that comes my way… you may live to regret such a choice." The Amazonian beauty smirked.
"...This is going to end badly." The boy muttered, placing his desk on the ground and ducking behind it like a fort.
"Come on, Iruma." The redhead said. "We're about to see a hero fight! With cool powers!"
"Barbara?" The boy said blankly. "How much collateral damage do Kryptonians usually leave behind?"
There was a moment of silence, before the small girl began hyperventilating in terror. "AHHHH!" I have to leave now!" The small girl began taking out some kind of… tacky and mishappend armor and putting it on.
"It's not going to be that bad-"
SMASH
The blonde brute... who was apparently a super-powered alien on par with Superman, punched the 'Amazon princess' through a wall, smashing it to bits. "Ahh, I think you killed her!" The tall one in green screamed.
"Gah! Sorry, sorry, sorry!" The brute took a one-eighty in her attitude and began digging through the pile. "I mean to hold back, and I usually don't-!"
And the possibly legitimate Amazon princess stood up from the rubble, unmarred as she's dusting herself off. "Well done... my turn." She tackled the blonde woman through another wall, followed by the sounds of high-powered smacking, each punch echoing at least within a fifty-mile radius.
"Cool!" The redhead shouted as the boy forced her to the ground.
"Not cool, we got a warrior woman and an alien demigod trying to kill each other in the middle of a school!" The boy shouted, ducking out of the way of a flying desk.
"Yeah, cool!" The redhead exclaimed as she tilted her head out of the way of a flying chair.
"No, not cool!" The green girl screamed as a glow around her ring emanated from her finger... sending out... a giant green... spring made out of... light to separate the two muscle bound women, it not being too dissimilar to how her magic worked. "Both of you, stop this senseless violence!"
"Coool!" The redhead squealed.
"Not cool, not cool!" The tiny girl screamed as she put on a helmet that made her look like a bug before glowing yellow... and then shrinking to the size of a fly. "I'm out of here!" She flew toward the window... and smacked into it, falling to the ground.
"I got you!" The boy caught the really tiny girl in his hands. "You okay?"
"Um... yeah." What looked like a nod came from the tiny girl.
"Oh yeah!" The redhead shouted. "We're gonna be the coolest superhero team yet!"
"We're not a team!" Everyone shouted as the chaos continued.
Zee meanwhile just stuck to her desk as she filed her nails. "Principal's coming back." She mentioned off-handedly."
"Ah, yes!" The princess shouted. "A good referee for this match from an elderly leader is just what we needed."
"If the principal comes back and sees this mess, we'll all get expelled!" The tall, green-haired girl shouted.
".. Shit. I can't have that on my record again!" The brute cried out as she began scooping up the mess she had been making.
"Is expelled a bad thing?" The princess asked.
"Yes, it means it'll be harder to get jobs in the future!"
"Wait, what!?" The boy screeched. "I can't lose the jobs I already have!"
"If we get expelled, my dad will kill me!" The redhead shouted.
"Our parents will murder us!?" The Amazon cried out.
"My moms will definitely kill me!" The green girl shouted as she made a giant broom.
"Omgomgomgomgomgomg-!" The tiny girl hyperventilated.
Zee rolled her eyes and waved her hands. "Moor elohw siht nealc." And the room was fixed in a flash as everyone was moved back to their seats.
The door opened, and the principal looked in. "I heard noises. Who was talking?"
"No one." They all responded at once with terrified and sweat-filled faces.
"... That's what I thought." The man kept glaring intensely at them before slinking away back into the hallway.
Everyone waited about five minutes before they even attempted to breathe again. "It felt like my old instructor gazing into my soul." The princess sighed.
"I've seen ninjas with swords to my neck who were less intense than that." The boy took a deep breath.
"You met ninjas-saving it another time!" The redhead shouted before jumping onto a desk. "Either way... Hahaha! None of you can deny it! You're all superheroes, just like me!" The girl pulled over her hoodie, which shifted into a purple Batman-like costume with a cape, a cowl, and yellow gloves and boots. "The one and only Batgirl!"
"… So you're just a cosplayer that wants to get people to fight and join your group of super friends?" The brute glared.
"I'm not a cosplayer." The cosplayer said. "I have gadgets and skills gained through years of degrading my social life out of the crippling anxiety of losing the people around me!" She exclaimed in a cheery tone.
The boy looked like he wanted to say something, but the Amazon joined into a hug with the twerp before he could say anything. "I see. Zeus has given me six sisters to join in arms!"
"Don't you mean five sisters and a brother?" The cosplayer Batman-girl asked.
"No." She blinked. "Six sisters, I see no male in the room."
"..." The redhead pointed over to the only boy in the room
"Ah, yes, I see now." Finally, something- "I should have paid attention to my fate earlier when this blue-spirited woman helped me onto the shore. Hera must have sent you to help on our quest."
"Yeah, no. No way, I'm out." The brute crossed her arms. "Every time I use my powers to help, I get dumped on and hated. I am not doing that again."
"And I abhor violence." The green girl muttered, trying to take off her ring. "This... thing just refuses to come off."
"And I don't want to be noticed or seen." The small girl said, sinking into her chair.
"Then why did you make a suit that gives you powers?" The boy asked.
"I was making it so I could be taller, but so far, it's just done the opposite." She pouted.
"Do you know what would help with that..?" 'Batgirl' grinned as she scooted up closely to the tiny girl. "A TEAM! I'm handy with gadgets, and Iruma can tinker! With a team backing you up, there's nothing that you can't do!"
"This spirited warrior speaks the truth!" The Amazon spoke out boldly. "By the gods, I was chosen to save the world of man. That is my Destiny, and I believe it is your destiny to aid me in this noble path. Together, we can be heroes like those which the world has never laid eyes upon before! Come, my sisters, come, join me in glory and honor!"
The girls still didn't look too impressed or convinced. "Look, Barbara." The boy sighed. "I know you mean well, but you can't just force-"
"If you guys help us, we can give the Amazonian princess a makeover." 'Batgirl' offered.
They all glanced at each other, then at the princess, then back at each other. "We're in."
"… Is that really all that it takes?" The boy asked.
"It's a girl thing, cutie. You don't have to understand it. Just accept it." Zee chuckled.
"Why do you exclude her? Are her fair skin and eyes not a clear indication of her femininity?" The Amazonian princess asked in confusion.
"...I don't look like a girl…" The boy pouted quite adorably.
"You kind of do, Bluey." The punk blonde smirked.
"Not that it's a bad thing." The tall eco girl raised her hands in the air. "Being more in touch with your feminine side is never something to be ashamed of."
"Would it help if I pay for lunch later?" The redhead smiled as she poked the boy's face.
"Yes, please." He grinned instantly with this strangely familiar smile.
"Excellent, we are all in agreement!" The Amazon cheered. "Now, we must head to the nearest training arena and hone our skills!"
"Right, and later, we can walk into the Colosseum and watch half-naked dudes get eaten by lions." The brute snickered.
"Oh, glad to see some traditions haven't changed."
"… whoa, I just had the weirdest sense of Deja Vu." 'Batgirl' turned to the boy. "That almost sounded like something you'd say."
"She's new to the world." The boy shrugged. "Anyways, I don't know about an arena .. but I might have an open space we can use."