Kara walked in with the others to the shop. Personally, she'd rather be in the food court chugging down the buckets of fried chicken like Bluey was right now (the kid has a stomach that somehow matched hers. That was both impressive and scary), but clearly, this crazy chick needed to learn how to chill. "Okay, lesson one about being a normal teen," Barbara spoke up. "Clothes. You need to wear normal and casual stuff that isn't, you know, battle armor and spandex."

"Why would I take off my armor? Won't I need to be prepared for battle at any time?"

"We're not saying never have it with you." The magician girl said. "But you're not going to be able to blend in as a normal everyday girl if you're seen wearing it all the time."

"Also, it's barely a problem to change in and out." Kara deadpanned. "Super speed, you could probably twirl around in a blink of an eye and be in and out of costume.

"But Barbara does not have super speed." The Amazon pointed out.

"Which is why I use a little method called frantic determination." She smiled. "Record for in and out of costume is five seconds." She waved her hoodie, and in exactly five seconds, she was in her cape and cowl. "See, super effective." She waved her cape and was back into her regular Batman hoodie.

"I have x-ray vision, and I'm even slightly freaked out." What was with the 'normal' people being the least normal acting? Kara was pretty sure she was the only alien here the last time she checked, though Bluey did make a convincing case otherwise.

"Back to the matter at hand, think of these clothes as armor for your secret identity." Jessica reiterated. "Your enemies won't know where or when to attack you if you distinguish yourself away from your usual look."

"Hmm... very well. Then I shall take the name of a name so common it can not be distinguished... I shall be known as Princess Adonis!" Multiple face slaps resulted from that.

"I don't even know where to begin with that one," Karen muttered.

"What is wrong? Adonis is the common name of most men in ancient times whose parents were eager to have them mate. It is so common that it has become practically meaningless and unremarkable."

"Well, nowadays, that's probably the most outlandish name you could come up with for anyone... Not to mention, it'd probably be better if you don't title yourself princess," Barbara explained.

"I have to hide my lineage?"

"How about..." Jessica rubbed her chin before snapping her fingers. "Diana Prince?"

"But on the field, I am Princess Diana-"

"Then you'll also need a codename, just like the rest of us!" Barbara grinned. "Something bold, powerful, daring... the Amazing Amazon!"

"Alliteration is fine, but it feels... Rather lacking." Zatanna shook her head.

"She has a lasso that makes you tell the truth." Karen brought up. "Truth Girl?"

"I am no mere girl. I am a Woman, through and through." Diana stood with a smile full of pride.

"Yet the armor will always leave people wondering." Kara snorted.

"Wait, wait, wait, that's it!" Zatanna's eyes sparkled. "Wonder Woman!"

"Wonder... Woman..." Diana tested the words on her tongue. "... This title speaks to me. I am Diana Prince... the Wonder Woman!"

"Great, great, now to the really fun part!" Barbara grabbed a bunch of tackily colorful and bright clothes. "Accessorizing! Always wear the brightest and boldest colors and logs you can! That's how you appear normal!"

"Yeah, no, nah uh, we're not making the jungle chick look like a walking pile of cotton candy." Kara pulled the princess out and handed her a bunch of actual stylish clothing. "Leather, wear lots and lots of black leather. Clothes don't make you look like a complete dweeb and actually look cool."

"There are ways of doing that without supporting the slaughtering of animals." Jessica pulled Diana out and handed her a bunch of really weird-smelling and bland-looking clothes. "Like these clothes from Turkey are made from organic leather."

Karen then dragged the girl over to a gray sweater. "The trick is to not draw attention to yourself, but not too much, or you'll draw attention to yourself."

Despite the pile she was now drowning in, the girl smiled. "I shall take these with great pride!" Diana shouted as she began taking off her shirt.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, too far princess, too far!" Kara stopped her before the perverts could start looking and staring around them.

"I do not understand." Diana tilted her head. "Us Amazons changed around each other all the time. It allowed us to display both muscle and battle scars to be proud of."

"Maybe where you're from, but we believe in modesty in the modern world," Jessica explained. "No one would be brazen enough to change in public."

"Are you guys almost done?" Bluey's voice could be heard from outside the store.

"Almost Irum-" Barbara turned to the boy in question, making all of them pause. "What are you doing?

"Oh, I was just checking out these clothes," Bluey explained as he had already taken off his shirt while holding a pile of clothes. "First time I planned on staying somewhere long term, so gotta buy more clothes."

… They all turned to Babs. "… Okay, this one might actually be on me and Harley for being sibling close and not establishing boundaries."

"If he ever looks at me, he goes to space." Kara laid down the law.

"Relax, the only thing that keeps Iruma's interest is food." Barbara waved off. "As far as I know, he isn't even into girls."

"That's definitely not stopping Ms. Magic over here." Kara pointed over to Zatanna.

The girl herself kept staring at the boy like he was a piece of meat. "So… So many scars and curves…" A tiny bit of drool came out of her mouth.

"Oh, I got about half of these in Africa and the other half on an island in the east hemisphere," Iruma explained, STILL somehow keeping that doey-eyed innocent smile on his face. "But don't worry about it. Most of them are perfectly survivable shark bites."

"Obviously." Diana nodded, not at all phased. "So, should I continue with disrobing...?"

Smack

"... And the tiny one's out for the count." Kara stared blankly at the blushing mess that was Karen, unconscious. "Anyone else getting on the nudity train, or are we going to stop it before someone snaps photos?"

"L-Leave it to me, I got this." Zatanna shook her head, taking out a wand and waving it around Diana. "Revoekam a nozama siht evig!"

A flash of light overtook Diana, revealing a girl in a red sweater and a blue knee skirt, complete with long white socks and red heels. "And this makes me look like a normal teenage adolescent."

"Yeah." Every girl who was still conscious nodded. It was a good enough look, even if it wasn't Kara's style.

"Wow, you're really good at magic, Zatanna." Iruma nodded.

"Always happy to please an audience." The girl bowed with a smile.

"Are we done here?" Diana asked.

"Nope, far from it!" Barbara cackled. "This is the start of OUR training for you. Your training in how to be an average teenager!"

"You mean staring at a phone all day and running into walls because of silly goggles?" Iruma asked as he pointed to a group of people with green goggles all over their faces.

"Eh, one of the two." Zee shrugged.

"What she needs is a little culture, and I know the best spot for it!" Barbara grinned. "To the best place in the entire world!"

Zee watched as they all arrived at... "A comic shop, really?" She asked, unimpressed. "That's your idea of culture?" The day was finally turning around, with the girls finally having a chance to show Diana a thing or two and perhaps get her to be less uptight and murdery than the rest of them. But once again, she was forced to endure a scene that she just didn't jell with.

"Of course! It has the knowledge of every superhero to ever live!" Barbara shouted with glee. "It is the foundation of every great memory I've ever had, and as a team, it shall be ours to share!"

"...I fear the day that you discover coffee," Zee muttered.

"She already did, and it made coffee a legally banned drug in Gotham for a whole year." Iruma, the cute... and from what she saw from his earlier show at the mall... built… boy that kept ringing familiar in her head spoke up. "Eventually, it got overturned because too many people were falling asleep on the road, which caused car crashes."

"Although... maybe I could try it again since I'm in another city." The energetic girl mused. "Eh, I'll think about it tomorrow. Now? Now is the time for action!" She ran in. "Behold, our history of every hero who ever lived!"

"... Not much history." Diana idly noted. "Why is this library so small?"

"That's because battles are fought here for precious knowledge, and it's up to us to seize the opportunity to gather as much as possible before they run out."

"Ah, I understand… this is a field of battle!" Diana took out her sword.

"...You had to use the battle analogy, didn't you?" Kara glared at the redhead.

"Okay, yeah, that's on me." Barbara looked through the comics. "Oooh, check this out. An issue of Hawkwoman."

"We shall fight for it!" Diana took out her sword and aimed it at Barbara.

"...And I instantly regret my decision!" Barbara shouted as she began getting chased off.

"...She'll be fine." People were surviving crazier around this group, and it was apparently not like she had a need to worry about anything. "So… what to do…" She had NO interest in comics whatsoever, and the figurines around the shop were just tacky. She'd rather read something with more drama and personal stakes, with just the hint of fluff like.. like…

"Ooooh, Elden Love Fantasy!" Iruma smiled, grabbing a book. "They're still making this series. How nostalgic."

"Wait, they sell that here?" Zee blinked, coming over. "That's my favorite book series, and it's the latest volume!" She grabbed it immediately. "You read this too?"

"Yeah, I've never been into comics either, but when Barbara and Harley took me to a comic shop for the first time, they had these on the shelves, and it just resonated with me more." Iruma nodded.

Kara snorted. "You like reading this mushy garbage?"

"It gave me a warm feeling that the newspapers I had to use as blankets could've given me." Right… She was reminded that this boy grew up homeless. "Besides, who wouldn't want to read about a magic princess that manages to find love-"

"Magic princess..." Every neuron in her brain clicked.

'And you're really good at magic and pretty. It won't take too long for people to be your friend."

"You... you think I'm pretty?"

"W-well yeah, you're like, a magic princess. L-like the kind who heal people with light and stuff..."

"You were the boy who liked my show!" She exclaimed. The first PERSON aside from her daddy who gave her support for her magic... For her talent. Performing those shows was torture until she felt the joy of pleasing an audience… and it all started with him.

Iruma blinked. "Well... yeah. I told you that when I learned you were magic."

"No, it… it was one of my first shows. I... I didn't remember you… I... but... I… I don't think I would've continued performing without you cheering in the crowd!" She hugged him tightly. "I… I'm sorry… I... I almost forgot about you…"

"It's fine. Not a lot of people were around TO remember me back then, and you probably had more important things on your mind." He chuckled as he patted her back. "And from what I've heard, you've done really well for yourself."

"Well, I did learn real magic, so... yeah." She nodded with a grin.

"So, I'm probably gonna buy this." He grinned.

"Actually." They turned to the store owner. "I'm going to need you to leave... and take her with you."

"THE KNOWLEDGE IS MINE!" Diana screamed, standing over a mountain of comics and broken shelves. "VICTORY!"

"Diana, she was using figure of speech!" Jessica shouted as she pulled the now psychotic Amazon away, looking outside and spotting a nearby vendor. "It's like saying you'll kill for a burrito."

"Ooooh, I see now." Diana nodded as she approached the vendor with money.

"I don't think that was the right choice of words either." Karen brought up.

"This is an innocent bystander she's approaching. I'm sure common sense will win out-" Jessica tried to justify-

"I will KILL YOU FOR A BURRITO!" Diana shouted at the vendor as the man began running away screaming. "ACCEPT MY PAYMENT OR DIE!"

"...About five years ago, I would've done the same thing, not going to lie." Iruma nodded. "So should we teach her that hurting people up is illegal, or is that a step too far out of her comfort zone?"

"Maybe we need to get her to relax and unwind a little?" Karen suggested. "A more calming and nonviolent location?"

"This is probably the fact I grew up in Gotham talking… but does such a place even exist?" The cute boy asked.

"Oh, I can cover that, cutie. Not a problem." Zee waved off. "...Kara will have to drag her over, though."

"Seriously?"

"You're the only one whose strength can compete with her own." Jessica pointed out.

She sighed. "Fine." The alien trudged over to the Amazon, grabbing her by the arm. "Come on, crazy pants, we're going somewhere else."

"But my burrito!"

"You can get it later!"

"This is going to be the whole day, isn't it?" Iruma muttered.

"Looks like it." Zee chuckled at the boy. He was the first person who ever inspired confidence in her talent. "So... what have you been up to since I last saw you?"

"Well, three years after you left, I actually decided to take a page out of your book and travel the world." He smiled as they began walking. "It wasn't in the exact way I wanted it to be, but I couldn't exactly be picky at the time. No money to actually complain."

"Oh..." she winced. "I can lend you some if you need it." Zee was all too familiar with having nothing while on the road…, but now she practically had everything she could ask for.

"It's fine. I've got jobs now, so it's all working out." He grinned. "I don't like being a leech."

"Huh… Well… if it wouldn't be too much…" Zee smirked. "I… may have an opening for an assistant for a couple of performances. I mostly perform at parties, so they're nothing big."

"Your show always did bring a smile to my face when I remembered it… I'd be honored to help you with more smiles, Zatanna." That grin was FAR too precious for words, or existence for that matter.

"Not a problem, Iruma… and please… call me Zee." She grinned.

"Sure thing, Zee-chan." He nodded.

She blushed. "Chan?"

"Well, I did learn Japanese during my time away since, well, that's what I am. Nicknames like that usually have suffixes."

"Ooooh!" Barbara got between them. "Do I get a nickname?"

"Mmm... Babs-imouto?"

"Yaaay...….. Wait. Why am I the little sister?"

"Because I'm the responsible one today."

"But you're my little brother figure. You're even shorter than me still!"

"Zee." Iruma smiled. "Who would you say is the older sibling?"

Zee grinned. "Well, at the moment, I DO have a bias towards the more mature and sensible blue-headed cutie right now-"

"No fair getting outside interference!" Barbara was only really proving his point.

"You could pick someone to ask then," Iruma suggested.

"Fine, I will!" Barbara called out. "Hey guys-!"

"It's Bluey!" Kara called out as she dragged Diana on her heels.

"I assumed Iruma led you as a responsible chain most of your life." Jessica nodded.

"Iruma seems more reasonable... I'm sorry, don't pay attention to me." Karen huddled into her sweater.

"...Oh, come on, I was the one looking out for you…" Barbara pouted as Iruma rubbed her head.

"And now I'm looking out for you. It's just the cycle of life." The boy grinned.

Jessica grimaced as she felt hands on her scalp. As someone who used money to donate to better causes most of the time, she felt that a spa treatment might be foreign, to say the least. "This is... an activity?" Diana questioned, fidgeting in her chair as the spa workers tried to keep her still.

"It's a spa day." Zatanna, or Zee as she liked to be called, answered as they placed moisturizing cream on the woman's face. "It's meant to relax and cleanse your body. You just rest while they do all the work. After all, a good part of being a normal teenager is knowing when and how to pamper yourself." That sounded a bit spoiled, but the head massage felt too good for Jessica to offer up any protest.

"And in the world of man, the toenail is a point of focus?" Diana asked in confusion.

"Precisely." Zee grinned, pointing to the only boy in the group. "See, even Iruma knows when to relax."

"Ooooh, I haven't felt this relaxed since that Atlantean sponge treatment." Iruma sighed in relief as he chewed on the cucumbers over his eyes. "I don't understand it, but I know when something feels good."

"… You're really going to need to give a list of everywhere you've been," Barbara said bluntly.

"Yes. I assumed Atlantis sunk after Poseidon's anger humanity caused ?" Diana questioned.

"They did, but the humans that lived there evolved into fish people and established their own monarchy." The boy nodded as he closed his eyes. "They're really friendly aside from their whole 'all humans are evil' thing about half of them assume."

"Same for my people." The Amazon said. "But instead of humanity as a whole, it's men in general, ever since Hercules and his… " Diana shuddered. "But I do not dwell on such atrocities and let it cloud my judgment, for there can be good found in all living things!"

"Right. Humans, Amazons, Kryptonians, Animals, Plants, Ghosts, Gods. All lives are equal, good and bad."

"... I feel like I should be agreeing completely, but something about a few of those have me taking a step back." Jessica raised an eyebrow.

"Yeah, ghosts aren't real." Kara, the only one not participating in the spa treatment, rolled her eyes as she lazily stared at her phone.

"No, they are. Super territorial." Iruma nodded. "I once got possessed, but then immediately got out of my body because it felt 'too empty.'"

"… That's a serious red flag as a magic user," Zee said, lifting one cucumber off her eye to look at him in concern.

"That's what he who shall not be named told me, and I've learned to take what he said with a grain of salt… literally. I carry a shaker of salt on me at all times." He showed it off to prove his point.

"I'd say watch the sodium in your diet if I haven't seen you eat worse," Barbara said as she kicked her feet up from the water.

"He ate RAW meat… how much worse could it get?" Jessica asked.

"Some of the stuff Iruma eats can't even be counted as food on any conceptual level."

"If it can be swallowed and fills you up, it's food." The boy answered as he was massaged. "Oooh man… This feels spectacular… I can almost-" The boy fell asleep right on the spot.

"... Wow, today's full of surprises." Barbara blink. "Usually, he can let his guard down long enough to fall asleep in a random spot he hasn't inspected top to bottom."

"Have you ever been to a therapist?" Karen asked as she was given her manicure.

"Oh yeah, when mom died, my dad pulled away my pills and sent me to one so I could openly talk about my problems," Babara mentioned offhandedly.

Iruma blinked awake while the rest of them winced in whiplash. "Wait, you're mom die-"

"These are the biggest callouses I've ever seen. We need the big guns." One of Diana's workers muttered as she took out a power cleaner... Which Diana confused for-

"WEAPON!" Diana leapt at the worker.

"Oh, give it a break, princess!" Kara shouted as she lept at the girl, trying to prevent her from strangling anybody.

"Great, now I'm going to be banned from my favorite spa after this is said and done." Zatanna groaned and shook her head in disappointment.

"Ha, this one isn't on me." Barbara grinned. "Take that, Iruma."

"You still tried to start this crazy team, so by proxy, it is, kind of, partially on you."

"I remember you being less argumentative."

"Barbara, I was eight," Iruma argued as he ate his other cucumber. "I didn't know much back then. I know a little more now."

"Yeah... still smarter than you." The girl smirked.

"And I'm still faster than you."

"I'm taller."

"I'm more agile."

"I can play the keys!"

"I can play the piano."

"Wait, since when!?"

"Since I accidentally summoned a demon from hell."

"Tell me your life!"

".. No." Iruma grinned cheekily.

"They definitely act like brother and sister." Jessica nodded with a small smile. Despite everything, it was nice to see such strong bonds be forged.

"You will not dismember my feet, lowly scum!"

"Just stop already, you're going hurt someone... and that's coming from me of all people!"

"… We should get out of here before they sue us." Jessica stood up.

"I've avoided lawyers this far, and I shall not break that trend!" Iruma leaped out of the water.

"… Everyone here scares me," Karen muttered.

"You're not alone there." Jessica sighed, helping the girl up. "You can pick where we go next."

Karen had absolutely nothing go her way today. She got in the middle of a food fight, got detention, was dragged into a junkyard to fight against scary amazons and dogs, and embarrassed herself in front of a boy who switched between really, really, intensely cute and intensely scary.

Now... now she was in familiar territory. Sitting in a quiet space, where no one watched her, eating snacks and gazing upon her favorite series. "I'm sorry, Ashley, but I can't text her. My phone has died," Teen vampires and werewolves in romantic dramas and dilemmas. Safe, comfortable, predictable, no loud noises whatsoever. Everything that Karen needed for a perfect day.

"So... this is a play of sorts?" Diana asked.

"Yes." Karen nodded excitedly. "A play that displays the story of two lovers thrown to the whims of chance and fate while the world threatens to tear them apart."

"Ah, like Orpheus and Eurydice." The amazon nodded. "A man who lost his love and failed to heed the words of Hades when rescuing her."

"Ooh, I love Hadestown." Zatanna grinned.

"Eh, I prefer Hamilton. More catchy lyrics." Barbara shrugged.

"Isn't that some guy that got shot in a duel?" Iruma asked. "My American history is rusty."

"Yes, but the musical adds some historical fiction to emphasize theatricality." Jessica nodded as she munched on popcorn.

"And what is… the plot of this particular play we're watching?" Diana asked, still looking as confused as ever.

"Aiden realized he can't live without Caitlyn, but Alexandra is telling him that Caitlyn won't text until the morning because that's exactly what Michaela didn't do to her when they broke up and..." Karen excitedly explained the plot, happy to be able to share her interests for once. "Isn't it just so sad and beautiful?"

Diana looked at the screen with a confused look. "Wow, teenage boys are complicated," Diana spoke up.

"Tell me about it." Every girl, except for the snoring Kara, responded.

"I just don't get why they just don't kiss and start dating." Iruma tilted his head. "If you don't, then it's just some repressed feelings you carry forever and ever while the person you like has the wrong mental message about your actions."

"...By Jove, I never thought this day would come…" Barbara muttered. "Iruma actually understands romance in some shape or form."

"I've read romance novels since I was a kid! I can comprehend romance!"

"Shhhh." Multiple audience members quieted them down.

"Yeah. But you've never been interested in it yourself before."

"Yeah... because I was eight and had no money."

"And now..." Barbara asked with a teasing grin.

"Now I have waaay too many problems and issues to deal with before I even try romance." He answered back. "If I go trying to find love, it'll be in my thirties."

"Shame, you'd break a lot of hearts with that mindset." Zatanna snickered.

"I know, but I told Lori I wasn't ready for marriage."

"… You weren't what now?" Karen blinked.

"I mean, sure, she's nice, but I just wasn't in the right place when she asked me."

"… holy hearts and chocolates, you're not joking." Barbara gasped.

"Why would one make jokes about something as sacred as marriage?" Diana asked as she looked at the screen. "Hold on. It looks as though Aiden is attacking with his mouth!" The Amazon took out a sword.

"Diana, no, it's just a kiss-!" and before anyone could blink, the girl leaped forward.

"I will save you!" She ran forward, cutting up the screen. "No foe shall strike while I am here!"

"...Okay, you have to at least give me SOME credit here." Iruma turned to Barbara as the rest of the audience fled away. "I never assumed kissing meant someone was attacking me."

"... Can we go back to the marriage thing?" The redhead asked.

"She asked. I told her I wasn't ready for a relationship. I don't see what needs elaborating." Iruma shrugged off. "And I'm pretty sure Diana ripping the theater in half is more of a concern now."

"What's it going to take to make you calm your butt?!" Kara shouted as she tackled the girl for about the tenth time today.

"My posterior is completely tranquil!"

"This is hopeless." Zatanna rolled her eyes. "The superhero thing is barely something we agree on, and Diana's too stuck on being a psycho warrior 24/7 to even attempt to be a normal person."

"Well, I'm not giving up on this team yet!" Barbara shouted. "These got to be a fast, easy, and fun way to make an Amazonian warrior take a chill pill and let their guard down."

"You mean like a carnival?" Iruma suggested. "That's what you and Harley always did for me when you wanted me to experience being a 'real kid.'" He answered.

"A... carnival?" Karen asked.

"Yeah, it's how I met Waylon. They're full of nice people and food."

"There is a fairground at the boardwalk." Jessica nodded. "It's not the worst idea ever, and we are running low on places we can take Diana without getting banned."

Right... another place Karen couldn't hide and run away into... lovely. "Will it be crowded?"

"Yeah. But that's the best part!" Barbara grinned. "There's a little something for everyone!"

"The Ferris wheel is actually pretty quiet and solitary," Iruma suggested. "You're all alone, and you got nothing but the wind and the lights before you, on top of the world where nothing can hurt you."

"... that does sound lovely," Karen admitted, her heart beating just a little faster by how he described it.

"So we all agree! Carnival fun, here we come!" Barbara shouted… as the theater manager lifted her over his shoulder. "Haha, jokes on you. This isn't the first time I've been carried out of the theater!"

Iruma gazed at the lights of the carnival... "It looks fun..." So many games, so much food, endless smiles. It was breathtaking to see. "It's almost like the ones back in Gotham.. except less broken glass and no used needles on the ground." And somehow less trash, which was a shame because it meant less emergency food he could raid.

"I feel like Gotham is the exception to 'never judge a book by its cover' the more I hear about it." Jessica shivered.

"Yeah, no, crime and corruption are rampant." Babs nodded. "So Diana, what would you like to try first?!" She exclaimed with all the energy he'd ever known from her.

"This place looks so... enchanted." Diana looked at everything with the life of innocence that every kid held, experiencing joy and wonder for the first time, looking around. "I wish for an activity that tests my might and skill!"

"Then the hammer toss is just what you need," Kara smirked as she pointed over to a bell game.

"For the record, you don't actually throw the hammer." Iruma clarified. Diana took things too literally... just like he tended to do when he was younger. "Wow. You're right, Babs-imouto, that's some serious Deja Vu."

"I know, right? I've been getting it a lot, you know, point after my little brother figure." Barbara elbowed him in the chest.

"Oh, you got another little boy to look after while I was away?" He teased.

"Couldn't afford to; the first one was a pretty big handful to deal with, just like he is now." Barbara shot back."

"Oh please, you and Harley combined still wouldn't be older than me." He shot back.

BONG

… They turned to see Diana using enough strength to send the bell flying into the air. "I have completed your challenge!" She exclaimed. "What is my reward!?"

"Take everything from the top shelf. Just don't hurt me!" The operator handed her all his stuffed animals as he ran away yelling.

"That reminded me of my first time… good times." Kara grinned.

"This is an odd way to stitch together cloth and cotton." Diana tilted her head as she hugged the giant blue stuffed bear. "Yet I find myself unable to stop embracing them with all the strength I have… Although the eyes look soulless."

"You get used to it." Iruma nodded. "They're basically trophies that you can use as a pillow."

"Ah, then I shall win as many of these stuffed trophies as possible!" She cheered. "Onwards, sisters, to the next challenge!"

"Eh, still better than the usual destruction she caused." Zee shrugged.

"As long as we keep her need for challenges in check, we should be good!" Barbara cheered as she pulled Iruma into one of the games. "Look, it's the blow up the clown head balloons water chalk game, just like in Gotham!"

"Oh yeah. We got banned because I drank all the ammo." Iruma fondly remembered.

"Well, we ain't banned here." She grinned. "And now you're old enough for me to challenge you without the feeling of letting you win!"

"Good, it'll make beating you more satisfying." Iruma chuckled as he walked to the booth.

"Ooh, someone's getting bold... you're on!" Barbara grinned as she slapped the money on the counter. "You're going down, little brother!"

They both aimed... and fired. Luckily, Barbara still had one weakness after all these years... being easily distracted. "Hey, I think I see Batman giving out free autographs."

"Really; where!?" Barbara immediately turned her head, taking her eyes off the target. "I don't see any- Hey!"

"All's fair in fun and war, Babs-imouto." For the first time in a while... Iruma felt like a real kid again, the kind that Barbara and Harley looked after.

Seven years... Seven years of his childhood were taken from him because he assumed that's how it had to be. He wouldn't take it for granted again. He would enjoy his life... And then, he would take the goodness and bring it to the people who needed it.

Pop

"Victory for me!" Iruma grinned. "I'll take the giant stuffed Batarang." He received the prize and gave it to Barbara. "I believe this is yours."

"Aww... now I can't stay mad at you." Barbra pouted with a large grin.

"You've never been mad at me." Iruma chuckled.

"True. Who could be mad at this baby face?" Barbara poked at it. "Boop. Boop. Boop."

He snorted. "Yeah, yeah. So, Diana seems to have adjusted well."

"My claims of victory are large!" Diana shouted as she swam in the pool of stuffed animals.

"Yep, knew that one of these activities would bring out her inner teenager." Barbara sighed fondly. "Which means we're just one step closer to being an official superhero team!"

"Yeah, an all-girls superhero team. Sounds interesting." Iruma chuckled.

"Come on..."

"Barbara, I'm going to school for the first time. I have jobs, legitimate jobs, that aren't working for people like Fish Mooney." Not that he was against working for criminals, but he needed to work with criminals he could trust. "Let me enjoy that for a while, then maybe, at some point in the future, I'll consider becoming a superhero."

She groaned. "Fiiiiine... but you are definitely seeing us in action." The girl demanded.

"I wouldn't miss it for the world." Iruma nodded. "It's your second biggest dream, after all." Right behind being Batman's sidekick.

Barbara grinned more fondly as she hugged him once again. "Promise me you won't leave again. Even if you intentionally break the law and become a world-conquering supervillain, promise me you won't leave."

"... I promise I'll stick around." He patted her back. "I'm never going to leave my family behind again." He was never going to leave, not until he made things right… and saved Gotham... saved the world from those who pushed people down into the shadows. "... Oh hey, Diana's getting into music." He pointed to the dancing girl.

"Then we shall, too!"

"I don't know how to dance."

"Neither do I, which is what will make it fun!"

Diana was... quite frankly, baffled by man's world. No one carried a blade of any kind or wore armor. They made large monuments to simple cloth, they fought for knowledge, and the less said about the 'spa day,' the better. It was equal parts filling and confusing all at once. "This 'carnival,' as you described it, has been a most fulfilling experience, dear sisters." She bowed to her newly recruited team and surrogate family to make up for one that she had left behind. "Though I am confused between this candy of cotton and the cotton of these trophies." She bit into the stuffed bear with soulless eyes that threatened to steal her own.

"One's a treat that feels like cotton, and one actually IS cotton." Iruma, the most sensible yet reluctant of all the sisters, explained. "The latter won't taste too good but will fill you, but the former will taste good but still leave you hungry."

"You know, if you have a craving for something sweet and filling, there's only one place in Metropolis that fills both needs." Zatanna, a beautiful and powerful, if not a bit misdirected and self-centered, sister, grinned widely.

"Oh, are you talking about what I think you're talking about?" Kara, possibly the strongest but most stubborn of her new sisters, smiled in a rare showcase of agreement.

"The sweetest and greatest teenage hangout spot in all of Metropolis that's so good you don't mind the numerous crowds!?" Karen, the meekest of the group, pipped up in excitement.

"A place with tons of organic options for those that are conscientious about the environment!?" A versatile and driven but unwilling warrior called her hands.

Diana turned to Barabra, a wise and motivated, if distracted and unfocused, sister, who merely shrugged. "I'm new here. I don't know what they're talking about."

"It's been a while for me since I've been to Metropolis. It's something sweet and feeling…" Iruma blinked. "Wait, it's actually still here!?" Their blue-haired sister's mouth began to drool.

"What is?" Diana asked.

The group grinned, dragging the two of them over to... "Sweet Justice!"

"Sweet justice?" Barbara tilted her head.

"Only the best and greatest dessert shop in the world run by people who actually don't get upset when all you can afford are the free samples!" Iruma cheered. "It's run by this nice old couple for whom I worked for a year. I've literally never been to a nicer place before in my life."

"Nicer than my house?" Barbara asked.

"Sorry, Barbara, but yes."

"Enough yapping. Time to get buzzed on ice cream and frosting!" Kara cheered as she pulled them inside the tiny but admittedly nice-smelling bazaar, where confectioneries of multiple types and sizes were displayed all over.

"This place looks amazing!" Barbara drooled as she looked at the display case. "How did I not know about this before!?"

"It's a metropolis original." Kara grinned. "Whenever I was forced to stay with my cousin, this was the only thing that made it all worth it."

"My parents would take me here for every A I got. It was the only time I was comfortable getting out of the house." Karen gave a small nod.

"Hey guys, welcome to Sweet Justice!" A fast-talking male with blonde hair and a peasant baker's garb spin with a jittery hand wave.

"You work here, Barry?" Iruma asked.

"Of course! Business is always booming, and I always keep on my feet." The male grinned widely. "So, what can I get for you guys?"

"Well, today is officially Diana's first day eating ice cream," Zatanna smirked, patting her on the back. "And Barbara's never been here, so she'll have the cookie kitty candy top delight while Diana will have the death by chocolate." Diana immensely reached for her mace. "Another figure of speech."

"For a city that bans violence, many of your speeches imply imminent threats to life." She noted.

"It's taking me about ten years to get used to it." The young blue-haired sister nodded as they took their seats. "For the most part, people aren't evil enough to try and hurt you. At least, that's my experience for anyone that lives outside of Gotham."

"I see..." She stroked her chin. "You must have good faith in humanity."

"For the most part. Just don't listen to killers, any rich and powerful people, or monsters that waste food." The blue-haired one spoke. "Especially the monsters that waste food... you can't trust them for anything."

"Alright, one cookie kitty candy top delight and one death by chocolate." The man spoke as he laid down multiple cold bowls filled with colorful substances on the table. "I also got everyone else their usuals, and you want the same usual the owners had written down for you, Iruma?"

"Yep," said sister, smiling brightly. "Go ahead, Diana, it's delicious."

"This is strange. I'm used to eating soup that's more warm and fluid." She poked at this 'chocolate' repeatedly before taking a bite...

Kablaaaaaaaan

An explosion of flavor entered her mouth. Textures and sensations she had never felt were now exploring her entire body and filling her entire soul. "By Hera... it is delicious..." She began eating this delicious food with vigor.

"Finally, she likes something casual." Kara rolled her eyes with a smirk.

"Careful, Diana," Karen warned. "You'll get brain freeze if you eat too fast."

"I shall endure this freezing of the brain, for this delicacy is finer than ambrosia and more holy than the gates of Elysium!" Diana continued as she devoured her bowl of 'chocolate death' whole. "More! I crave more substance!"

"Your usual Iruma. Three servings of everything on the menu." The blonde male dumped the pile on the table.

"... just staring at that alone is enough to give someone diabetes." Jessica's eyes widened in disbelief.

"Don't worry. I have insulin stored away just in case I or anyone else ever develops it." Iruma nodded as, in one bite, the blue-haired sister had devoured half of the enormous pile. "Might want to go ahead and get seconds ready, Barry!"

"Seconds?" Diana asked.

"It's basically another round," Iruma explained as they finished.

"Ahh. How wonderful to have a sister so well-versed in understanding. Seconds!" Diana exclaimed.

"You can't seriously still be hungry after-" Zee paused as the wonderful food had disappeared. "Do you ever get full?"

"Getting full is a myth." Iruma nodded. "It's the only one I've never disproven."

"A ferocious appetite well suited for an Amazon." Diana nodded as more 'ice cream' was placed on their table and quickly devoured.

"Um... do we have the budget to pay for this?" Jessica asked.

"Don't worry." Iruma smiled. "Barbara-imouto said she was paying double for lunch."

"… I'm gonna need to find a job after today." The red-headed girl sighed as Iruma and Diana completed their meal.

"Seconds!" Diana and the blue-haired sister called out at the same time.

"Here you go!" The blonde man delivered.

"Seconds!" And once more, it disappeared in a flash.

"Here you go!" The blonde man delivered yet again.

"Seconds!"

"Okay, I can understand the princess… but where the heck is it going for Bluey?" Kara asked a bit worryingly.

"Oh. That's just the years of malnutrition making my stomach capable of processing food into energy at a faster rate than anyone else." The girl explained with a smile as she ate.

Her fellow sisters stared at their blue-haired comrade in concern. "You poor, poor boy." Zatanna hugged sister Iruma's head. She still had no clue as to why they claimed she was a male.

"Sisters, we must make a vow now!" Diana stood up proudly. "Every future victory we have shall be celebrated here!"

"I'm down with that." Jessica smiled as she ate her strangely green pie.

"Never turning down food." Kara grinned as she slurped up her cream of ice.

"Heck yah! Sweet Justice for the win!" Barbara cheered happily.

"I have no idea what that means!" Diana answered honestly as she too excitedly proclaimed.

"It's a lot... calmer than a lot of the things we've done for the day." Karen nodded.

"Food celebration!" Iruma cheered. "Nothing can ruin this moment!"

BOOM

".. Haha, I totally didn't jinx it!" Barbara called out as strange little green contraptions flooded the stand of confectionery.

"I will admit, that one's on me." Their blue-haired sister nodded sheepishly.

Barbara was officially having the best day ever. Six new friends and an old one coming together as one group of BFFEAEAEAEs, soon to be one team of super powerful, super cool superhero super friends (in spite of Iruma's insistence on not being. Barbara was sure that was just nerves talking)! It was already perfect that they were ending the day with ice cream, but it was even more perfect that they were ending the day with fighting evil robots!

"Aren't those city construction drones?" Karen asked as she began ducking underneath the table. "Why would they be attacking a sweets shop!?"

"Aren't those made by Lex Luther?" Kara asked. "I think the better question is, why wouldn't they be attacking a sweets shop?"

"I knew the man was a monster." Iruma nodded. "So... stop them or..."

"This property is scheduled for demolition. Vacate the premises in thirty seconds."

"Hold on, we told those contractors we weren't selling!" An old couple shouted, likely the owners that Iruma spoke of before, shouted. "Our lawyers settled everything!"

"This property is scheduled for demolition. Vacate the premises in twenty seconds." Said robots began buzzing.

"... Is this a time of combat or..." Diana asked.

"No." Jessica shook her head. "We will discuss and settle this in a peaceful manner."

"They're robots. They don't exactly have a reason to talk things over." Kara rolled her eyes.

"Vacate time has ceased. Prepare for demolition." The robots took out buzzsaws and lasers and began firing all over the place.

"Alrighty!" Barbara changed into her costume. "Time to have some bad guy butt-kicking fun!" She exclaimed, throwing out batarangs.

"This is the exact opposite of fun!" Karen screeched out as she shrank into her tiny bumble bee suit. "We can't fight city property!"

"It's Lex Luther's property so that pretty much gives it a free pass to destroy it!" Kara cracked her knuckles as she quickly changed into her costume, smashed through one of them... and immediately began coughing. "Gah ah-what the hell!?"

"All Lex Corp property is powered with Kryptonite."

"Isn't that stuff supposed to be rare interstellar rocks!?" Kara shouted in fury.

"Yeah, and the man has had about fifteen years to find most of it!" Iruma called out, pulling down a couple of people who were still in the shop. "Karen, Jessica, since you're not fighting, help me get the people out of here!"

"Hold on, Iruma. Green Lantern could create a perimeter barrier and surround these mechanical menaces and crush them in their place!" Diana called out.

"I still say this is a misunderstanding-"

"It's LEX LUTHOR!" Kara shouted as she shot out laser vision, accidentally wrecking more of the shop. "Name one time the man has been nice!"

"Hey, watch the eye lasers. You almost singed my hair!" Zatanna called out as Iruma tackled her down before a buzzsaw could strike her from behind. "Ooh, someone's getting a little familiar, aren't you cutie?"

"Can you use magic to fix this place up once we're done?" Iruma asked, completely looking over, or not noticing at all, the blatant flirting.

"Only if you can get rid of all of them," Zee said. "No point in fixing it up if they'll just smash it down."

"We can do that, no problem!" Barbara grinned. "There's only ten of them left."

"Guys!" Karen cried out from the window. "I tried to see the situation from outside!" Or run away. "There's thousands of them!"

"What!?" They called out as they saw the streets, which were filled to the brim with robots.

"Then we must endure the fight!" Diana shouted as she sliced one in half. "Be it days, weeks, months until they are defeated!"

"We can't fight for weeks!" Jessica shouted as she was using her ring to just push the bots back, which did nothing at all to stop them.

"Don't worry, I made a special EMP Batarang for such an occasion!" Barbra took it out and threw it.

"Hold on, maybe I can hack-" Karen grew back to normal size, getting in the way of the EMP Batarang and getting electrocuted.

"My bad." She apologized with a wince.

"Property has been demolished," one of the robots said, as the entire area around them was nothing but rubble.

"YOU MANIACS!" Iruma cried at the destruction. "You blew it up... you blew it all up!" He banged his fists on the ground. "Darn, you! Darn, you all to heck!"

A sign for a 'future Lexcorp mall' was planted on the ground. It read, "Please evacuate, or we will use force."

"Surrender is never an option against forces of evil!" Diana exclaimed. "Be it against an army or their leader!"

"There's no point in fighting now. They've already completed their job." Jessica groaned. "Continuing to fight them will only cause more problems and more damage."

"Then we must defeat and imprison this Lex Luthor you have spoken of," Diana said.

"Pfft, good luck with that," Iruma muttered bitterly. "The man's untouchable, even by Superman's hands."

"The man is a god?" Diana asked in confusion. "I have not heard of him before..."

"It's a long story and- What's with the fog?" Kara blinked as the fog surrounded the streets, as did the sound of drums.

"... Oh no." The Amazon winced. "Mother."

"Oh, we're meeting your mom. Cool, maybe she can help—" Barbara trailed off, seeing the beast of a woman, dreadlike Diana but more regal and armed with a stare that could rip you in half if you looked too long. "Diana, your mom looks like a final boss."

Iruma gulped as he whispered to her, "...Barbara, every instinct I have-"

"You mean your overwhelming crisis-"

"Not the time-THAT… is telling me we have no chance against this lady."

"Diana... you DARE to leave the island, without permission, unsupervised!?" The woman shouted, stomping up to the princess.

"Unsupervised?" Zatanna questioned. "Didn't you say it was your destiny once in the world of many something?"

The beast of the woman scoffed. "This child has no such destiny. She entered the trials of Athena behind my back and stole the enchanted armor before running away!"

"Mother, I-"

"That is Queen Hippolyta to you." She glared, grabbing the Princess by the ear. "Now you are getting on the boat and returning to Themyscira, where you will be grounded for the next century!"

"Wait, but what about our hero team!" Barbara shouted, getting in front of the queen. "She's a valuable member of-!" She was grabbed by her bat ear and tossed over to Kara.

"Whatever lie she told you is exactly that. A lie. You will do well to forget this day." The queen groaned before pulling Diana away.

"Guys, we can't just let her-!" Barbara started, only for Kara to drop her.

"So this whole day was a huge waste of time," Kara grumbled. "We followed a crazy girl on a crazy quest for her crazy dream for absolutely no reason today, and it cost us one of Metropolis's coolest hang-out spots!"

"That wouldn't have happened if you just ease up on the fighting and think things through!" Jessica shouted.

"Oh, like you were doing anything with your self-righteous pacifist shtick! Bluey was more useful, and he couldn't do squat!"

"Hey, don't talk about Iruma like that!" Barbara shouted.

"I really don't mind-"

"You weren't much better. You knocked out Karen because you wanted to play hero so badly!" Kara shouted.

"At least I was fighting. Karen was running away!"

"I'm in pain and embarrassed... Terrible day," Karen mumbled.

"ENOUGH!" Zee shouted as she got everyone's attention. "Clearly, this was a mistake, so there's only one thing left to do?"

"Clean up this mess and try to file a lawsuit?" Iruma asked.

"Nope, we go our separate ways and never hang out as a group again." She marched away.

"Wait, but the team-!" Barbara tried to keep Zee in.

"Yeah, right!" Kara walked away next. "There was never a team to begin with!"

"Kara, wait-!"

"I shouldn't have agreed to come along in the first place. You're all too violent." Jessica flew off.

"Come on Jess-!"

"I never wanted to be a hero to begin with!" Karen ran down the street.

"Guys, please... please don't leave me... don't leave..." Friends leaving... that's what happened when people were friends with her when they hung around her… they left her... they left her.

"Wow." Iruma deadpanned as they all walked away. "And here I thought the hero break up after the first mission goes poorly trope was a myth."

"… Are you going to leave too?" Barbara asked weakly. Iruma stated over and over he didn't want to be a hero.. he had the least amount of reasons to stay with her… to hang around her… he would leave again and-

"No." Iruma nodded. "For one, I still haven't found a place to stay, so I don't have anywhere to go."

"Oh..."

"And two." He offered his hand to her. "I promised I wouldn't leave my family behind. I know you believe in this team thing, so if everyone is gone, then I'll stick with you.

"... IRUMA!" She hugged him tightly. "Thank, thank, thank you, thank you, thank you-!"

"Always... happy to help." He gasped as he patted her back. "Besides, Lex Luthor took down a place that sells food. I'm not going anywhere until the score is settled."

"Okay... Right." She nodded. "Just me and you... What are we thinking?"

"Kidnap Lex Luthor and punch him in the face once for every scoop of ice cream he wasted."

"... Where was this earlier during the fight with the bots?"

"Barbara. I don't have gear on me like you do, and I needed to get the people out." He explained. "Besides, robots can't feel pain or fear unless programmed to. Threatening them doesn't work."

"… Wait a minute!" Barbara blinked as she jumped into the scraps. "Sure, it makes sense for Lex Luthor to make robots that destroy cool places, but it doesn't make sense why he would do it!"

"Because he's rich, and most rich people in power suck and look out for themselves and have very few exceptions like Zatanna?"

"That's my point!" She shouted. "He's trying to make money and look good doing it. Why would he destroy popular places that get everyone to blame him? That would cause a loss of customers."

"... That's right, he can't be arrested because, in spite of knowing he's evil, he's built a mask of looming altruism!" Iruma snapped his fingers.

"Exactly, which means that Lexbots wouldn't go crazy and destroy really cool places unless-aha!" She pulled up what looked like a little tiny antenna from the circuit boards. "Unless they were hacked!"

"… But Luthor's one of the smartest people on the planet," Iruma said. "There's not a lot of people that both would AND could hack him. Especially for something this…" He waved his hands around. "I would say petty if it wasn't food-related."

"Then it has to be someone just as smart and close to him… and we're not going to be able to do this alone." Barbara pounded her hand into her palm. "Now, there are three things we need to do. First, get you some gear for the inevitable battle."

"Fair enough."

"Second, call the girls and reunite the team to break Diana out."

"That queen gave me more scare vibes than Kara, and she could literally push Earth out of orbit."

"We'll do it subtly." Barbara waved. "And third… we call Harley and tell her you're still alive. The day's been crazy, and I want to make sure we get that out of the way before anything else."

"Yeah, that's also fair." He nodded. "Think she's going to freak out?"

"I'd bet money if you and Diana didn't make me broke." Barbara raised an eyebrow. "You're lucky that I still saved for the 'Iruma emergency food fund' even after you disappeared."

"And that's why you're my best friend." Iruma grinned. "... Babs-imouto."

"I will make you change it to Babs-nee-san one day!"

"Too late." He smirked.

"What do you mean too late?"

"I mean, it's too late."

"Too late for what!?"

"Just too late."

"I will break your cryptic convos one day!"