A/N: See Chapter 1 for Disclaimer.

Chapter 2: The Captain's Decision

Naturally, Captain Janeway reversed course out of Kensyte territory, and they remained a good distance away from Kensyte space for the next several days, as both Captain Janeway and Commander Chakotay pored over all the files Commander Jamyse sent to Voyager. They studied them very closely, night and day, and after studying their files and visiting some nearby planets and privately speaking with other aliens they met about the Kensytes, most regrettably, the Captain and the First Officer were left with no choice but to face the fact that Commander Jamyse was telling them the truth and was not deceiving them or playing games with them. He truly did warn them about the Byreya element out of a good heart and conscience. Whether they liked it or not, they were now left with no choice but to decide which of their crewmen had to take the proverbial bullet so that the rest of them could get to the Alpha Quadrant safely. But as far as the Captain was concerned, the choice had already been made.

"Obviously, as this ship's Captain and First Officer, you and I have got a very difficult decision to make now, Kathryn," Chakotay told her solemnly as they sat at the table of the conference room together.

But Kathryn knowingly shook her head and said, "There is no choice for us to make, Chakotay. As Captain, this responsibility falls to me. If anybody is going to be sacrificed now, it's going to be me, not anyone else."

"Do you really believe that that's the best decision, Captain? Look at it logically for just a second. You have a husband, a seven-month-old baby girl, and four other young children who need their mother. I, on the other hand, never got married and never had any children. I don't have people in my life who need me the way the Doctor and your children need you."

"You're right, Chakotay. That is a perfectly valid and perfectly logical argument. But I cannot use only logic in making this decision, and I cannot think of just my family alone. I have to do what's right for all of you, not just what's right for my husband and my children and myself. Just looking at the history of my command of Voyager logically, I know that logically, in my head, I made the choices that I had to make as a Starfleet captain over the years. I had to sacrifice our way back home to save the Ocampa. I had to start that civil war within the Borg to give some of their drones a way to fight back. I had to sacrifice Arturis's world to save the entire galaxy from Species 8472. I had to sacrifice Tuvix's life to save Commander Tuvok and Mr. Neelix. I've never been afraid to make the tough and painful decisions that a Starfleet captain has to make at times for the sake of the greater good. I always did what I knew to be right. But try as I may, I simply cannot divorce myself from my emotions and my heart. Even though mentally and logically, I know that I did what I had to do, and even though the good Lord Jesus, Himself, came into my life and forgave me and helped me to forgive myself for the horrific things I had to do, still, all the lives that have been lost because of command decisions that I made…emotionally speaking, it still tears my heart to shreds this very day. And my heart can't bear the loss of another life under my command, Chakotay. Especially now that we're finally this close to Earth. It just can't bear it. I can't bear it. If the price we have to pay to get this ship and crew home is for one more life to be lost, then I say that after all the suffering, after all the deaths that some of my command decisions have caused – even if they were command decisions that had to be made for the greater good – I say, let that life we have to lose be mine, Chakotay. Not anybody else's. Enough people have died because of me. It's not fair for anyone else on this crew to pay this price. Only me. And if it'll get us through Kensyte space safely and get you guys back on Earth with your families where you belong, then it is a price I will very gladly pay, Chakotay," Kathryn said emotionally as a tear escaped from one of her blue eyes.

Chakotay began to cry with her in those moments, and then, he just couldn't resist the urge to put his arms around her and give her the biggest hug.

"I'd give anything if you'd change your mind and let me be the one to do it, Kathryn," Chakotay whispered through his tears.

"I know you would," Kathryn whispered as they continued clinging to one another. "I know that if I asked you to do this for me, you'd do it in a heartbeat."

"You're right. I would," Chakotay said, and then he and Kathryn finally let go of each other.

In the next moment, Kathryn shook her head, and she told Chakotay, "I'm not about to let that happen to you, my old friend. You're not about to sacrifice your life, not now that we're this close to finally getting out of the Delta Quadrant. I've got much bigger plans for you than that."

"Such as?"

"Such as, you finally meeting your Miss Right and falling in love and getting married and having and adopting five children, just like I did. That way, each one of my children will have one of your children for a playmate back on Earth."

Chakotay chuckled and asked, "Can you really see me with five children?"

"Absolutely. You'd make a wonderful father. Not as wonderful of a father as Luke, though; I don't think any other man except Luke can manage the level of fatherly awesomeness that he's attained."

"You're probably right."

"But you could get close."

"Thank you. That's quite a compliment."

"It's true."

"I noticed you didn't say anything about me becoming a Starfleet captain."

"Is that what you want for your future?" asked Kathryn.

After a brief pause, Chakotay shook his head and replied, "No, I don't think so. After spending the past twenty years in the Delta Quadrant, I think I'm more than ready to retire from Starfleet and just enjoy life as an anthropology professor at Starfleet Academy."

"I hear you. That's what I was going to do. Retire from Starfleet once we got back to Earth, I mean. And then just focus on my husband and my children for a while. I was going to stay at home with the kids for a change so Luke could go back into medicine."

"Now, it's my turn to ask: is that really what you want for your future?"

"Oh, yes," Kathryn said without a moment's hesitation. "Don't get me wrong. Even with the horrific psychological toll the past twenty years have taken on me, I still wouldn't trade my time as a Starfleet captain for anything. But yes, if it were possible for me to return to Earth with you, I think that after all I've been through out here, I would've been more than happy to hang up my pips and just enjoy my husband and my children and focus on them for the next twenty years."

"You can still do that, Kathryn. You can still have that life back on Earth with Dr. Luke and your children. A final decision hasn't been made yet. Nothing's been set in stone."

"Oh, yes, it has been, Chakotay. I'm not about to let you or anybody else do this. As the captain of this crew, this is my responsibility, and I'm not putting my responsibility off on you or anyone else on my crew. This is my cup to drink, Chakotay, and mine alone. Besides, who knows? According to the files from the Kaltyra, their biometric device will be able to pull Byreya particles from Voyager's atmosphere for eight months out of the ten it will take us to cross Kensyte space, before it will need to start depositing the particles into a human receptacle. I realize that their technology is far more advanced than ours, but even so, you never know what might happen, you never know what we might discover in the next eight months. We just might come up with some other kind of receptacle for the device when it needs it, and then I won't have to take the Byreya bullet to get us home."

"So that's your decision then, Captain? We tell the senior officers, get them to start studying the Kaltyra's files on Byreya and their biometric device, get them to start looking for a different kind of receptacle for it other than a human when it needs one in eight months. And if we haven't come up with anything by then–?"

"Then I become the receptacle. The chyama. The sacrifice. That's the Captain's decision."

"I suppose it would be utterly pointless to try to talk you into trying to go around Kensyte territory, even if going that way will take us another seven or eight years to get back to the Alpha Quadrant."

"You're right. It would be. I absolutely refuse to risk all your lives by keeping you out here in the Borg's territory for another seven to eight years, without Starfleet nearby for backup. That's completely out of the question, Chakotay. You know that."

"Yeah, I know that," Chakotay sighed, fighting off more tears.

"Call the senior officers in, Commander. And my husband. It's time we inform them of the situation."

"Yes, ma'am," Chakotay said gravely, barely masking his broken heart, and in the next moment, he tapped on his combadge and called everyone into the conference room.