"Truly successful decision-making relies on a balance between deliberate and instinctive thinking."

– Malcolm Gladwell

Chapter 6

After three years, you'd think I would know the man I decided to marry. Loid, for the most part, has been pretty predictable and dependable when it comes to his schedule. Occasionally he has to stay late for work or has to rush out for an emergency, but he is more consistently home everyday by 5:30 PM. He likes to plan things out and stick to a schedule if he can, so it's safe to say spontaneous isn't exactly a word I would use to describe him. When I think I know all there is to know about him, he goes and surprises us. Take recent developments for example. For three years, we were basically best friends living together and raising a child together. It would have made a good sitcom.

But now all that's changed. He cuddles me, holds me, kisses me, and talks about possibly having children one day. I mean, it wouldn't be so terrible. We're both still young and Anya seems very eager to be a big sister. We could turn my old room into a nursery. Then again, would we want more space in case we decide on more than one? Maybe I'm thinking too far ahead. We haven't gone past kissing so I'm sure baby making is a long way off from today.

What was I talking about before I got lost in thoughts of babies with Loid? Oh that's right. Loid and his dependability. I feel like with Loid, you always know what you're getting. He's honest and straightforward. Sure he surprises us every now and then, but for the most part our lives are pretty routine. Then there are days like today. He showered Anya and I with expensive gifts and while we were on our way to explore the city, he announced he wants to change our plans! We were supposed to be headed for a week-long skiing trip in Fregis, but we're now on a plane…to Japan. JAPAN!

Of all places, I don't know how or why he would have thought of Japan. I've heard that it was full of culture and history. A beautiful country where past, present and future meet in synchronicity. In all honesty, I'd be amazed with any place outside of Ostania. I've never been outside of my home country and, sadly, I'm not all too familiar with other places in the world. Of course, we're taught about them in school, but Ostania's main focus and priority is, was, and always will be Ostania. I never questioned it, but when Mr. Desmond was arrested and we began to learn more about Westalis and the war, I started to wonder if what I had been taught my whole life was true. Was Ostania the bad guy in all this? Were we using "peace" as a cover for oppression?

We had been in the air for hours. Anya passed out from excitement half way through the flight and was sleeping soundly in her sleep, leaning against the window with Bond's head in her lap. Loid was on my other side reading a book. It was the latest volume of Spy Wars. He liked to say that he had to read them before Anya to be sure they were appropriate for her, but I knew he enjoyed them too. It was these little moments with these two I wanted to last forever. Especially now with what happened before we left.

I didn't tell the Shopkeeper about the package left for me at my desk. God only knows what would happen if he found out my identity had been compromised. I don't think I have ever heard of this happening. Then again, Garden wouldn't exactly tell all the other assassins about it. The fear of the unknown was their greatest weapon.

I tried to find out who had left the envelope at my desk, but no one seemed to remember anyone out of the ordinary or they didn't recognize in the area. That opened the frightening possibility that it was left by someone I work with. Or worse: someone I already know. I'd been worrying about Loid and Anya finding out for so long, I didn't think about anyone other than them finding out. When I left the office that day, I found the closest dark alley and burned the photo and envelope. I met up with Camilla, Millie, and Sharon afterwards to help cover up the fact I was going to be home late.

On my walk home that night, I decided that I would leave my life as Thorn Princess behind me. There was no question about it. I couldn't keep putting my life in danger. I had a family to think about. Peace was on the horizon and with my new revelation about Ostania, I really didn't have a reason to continue being an assassin. The money I made as an assassin never really went into the joint account Loid and I had and we lived a comfortable life on my salary as a City Hall worker. But above all, I couldn't keep lying to Loid. I've actually felt that way for a while. He didn't ask questions about why I was out late sometimes, but I could tell he worried. This new life we're starting together needs to start right. No lies. No secrets. No more killing.

A man came out of the cockpit and leaned in toward Loid's ear and whispered something.

"Thank you," Loid said as he shut his book and turned toward me. "We'll be landing soon. We should probably wake Anya."

"Of course," I nodded.

Somehow, Loid managed to get us a private plane. I'm sure it cost him a fortune, just like everything else on this trip. I wonder if he was dipping into his personal savings. We each have our own personal accounts in addition to our joint account we have for appearance purposes. I don't ask him how much money he has saved away and he doesn't ask me either. I don't see him ever splurge on anything, so he could have more than enough to pay for all this and more. Then again, he could be draining his savings to take us on this trip.

"Anya," I whispered as I gently shook the little girl awake. "Anya, time to wake up. We're almost there."

"I'm still sleepy," Anya whined.

"I'm so sorry, Anya. I know you are, but we need to sit up and put our seat belts on."

The cabin shook a little, jolting the little girl awake. "Anya," Loid said in his stern voice, "it's time to get up. This plane is going to shake a lot more so you need to listen to your mother and put your seatbelt on."

Anya forced herself to sit up as she rubbed the sleep from her eyes. I was helping to put her seat belt back on when I caught Loid looking at his pocket watch again. He had been looking at it every now and then since we got off the train. At first I didn't notice. When I finally did, I felt really happy that he liked it and that he was using it. But I started to notice that his expression was changing each time he pulled it out. It was as if he was waiting for something to happen. He looked…worried.

"Is everything ok?" I asked in a whisper.

"Hm?" Loid said in reply as he looked up and quickly put away his pocket watch. "Everything's fine. Why do you ask?"

"I just noticed you've been keeping an eye on your pocket watch all day. I wasn't sure if you were waiting for something or if maybe we were late for something…"

Loid out a sigh before forcing a smile. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to worry you. I had some things sent to where we'll be staying and I wasn't sure if we'll make it in time. It looks like we'll be ok though."

It isn't often I doubt Loid, but it got the feeling that he wasn't telling me everything. The feeling is quite unsettling really. I'd hate to think that he was hiding something from me. Don't worry, I understand how hypocritical and ironic it is to feel that way all things considered.

"Loid, if there's anything you need help with…" I was cut off when the cabin began to shake. I instinctively grabbed onto Loid's hand and pulled Anya closer to me.

I felt Loid squeeze my hand. "The plane is just descending. We're going to land," he whispered in my ear. "We will be just fine. I promise."

All I could do was nod my head. I didn't fly much and the few times I have, I always hated taking off and landing. It's something about being strapped down in a twenty thousand pound hunk of metal hurling toward the ground that made me feel uneasy. As the turbulence intensified, I grabbed hold of Loid's arm as tight as I could and shut my eyes. Despite how terrified I felt at that moment, I couldn't help but think about how nice he smelled. I never noticed until now, but he smelled of sandalwood and saffron with a hint of amber. It was calming and alluring all at the same time.

I continued to take several deep breaths as I repeated Loid's words in my head. We'll be fine. I promise.

Before I knew it, the plane wasn't shaking anymore. I slowly opened my eyes to see we had landed and the flight crew hurried to get everything ready for us to disembark the plane. Bond excitedly barked as he ran in circles. He was definitely ready to get off this plane. Anya immediately unbuckled herself and hopped out of her seat to chase our canine companion. Loid patted both Anya and Bond on the head as he walked past them and met with the pilot by the cockpit. As it was this whole flight, they spoke privately and in whispers. I wondered what that was about. Come to think of it, the crew spoke primarily to Loid directly and when they would address Anya or me, they would only call us "Miss" and "Madam". They didn't even speak Loid's name out loud. It seemed strange, but I kept my mouth shut.

The pilot shook Loid's hand and said something to him with a look mixed between admiration and sorrow. Loid just shook his head before walking back over to us. He didn't speak much as he ushered us out of the plane. The crew was loading the last of our bags into a waiting car. They helped us into the car before handing the keys off to Loid and handing him a sealed envelope. There was that odd, unsettling feeling again.

He started to drive down the single paved lane in the area. The airstrip was in the middle of a green field surrounded by a line of trees hiding a concrete wall. The road led to the only way in or out of the compound that was guarded by a large metal gate. The metal creaked as it slid into the concrete wall, making way for us to leave. That's when Loid opened the envelope. He peeked in and pulled out a USB stick. He plugged the device into the port on the dashboard. At first the screen seemed to malfunction, but Loid tapped on it and the display became clear again. When he tapped on the navigation thumbnail, a preloaded address popped up.

I stared out my window in awe as we headed to our destination. Along the side of the road were countless cherry blossom trees, soft pink petals falling from their branches. Above the treeline, the snowy peaks of mountains in the distance could be seen against the orange sky and setting sun. It was truly a breathtaking sight.

"It's cherry blossom season," Loid pointed out. "A colleague from work mentioned it and I decided to change our plans last minute. I was hoping to surprise you two."

"It's definitely a surprise," I smiled. "It's so beautiful."

"It is, but not as beautiful as you."

I looked over at him. His eyes were on the road, but I could still see the smirk on his face.

"Papa's flirting again," Anya teased.

"Perhaps you'll have to get used to it because you have a very pretty Mama," Loid noted.

I quickly turned away as my cheeks started to turn red. "I'm guessing we'll be staying in tonight," I said, trying to change the subject. "What are our plans for tomorrow?"

"I wanna see Marine!" Anya announced excitedly.

"Who?" Loid asked.

Anya pulled out a magazine from her bag and held up a photo of a girl dressed as a character from a popular cartoon I saw Anya and Becky watching once.

"This is Marine. She can be anyone she wants to be thanks to her lover."

"Her what?" Loid frowned.

"I think she means boyfriend," I corrected before Loid had a heart attack. "I saw this article the other day. She's super famous isn't she?"

"Mmhm," Anya nodded. "Becky says that the man from Westalis is going to invite her to a culture something."

"The Cultural Exchange Event. It's amazing," Loid noted. "Artists, actors, musicians and all sorts of people come from around the world to participate. Rather, they used to. A lot of people have declined over the years because of the tension between Westalis and Ostania, but this year is supposed to signify the two countries' unity and peace effort."

His voice sounded excited when he talked about the event. Like he was recalling a fond memory, but he couldn't be right? That event took place in Westalis. Not many people from Ostania have ever set foot in Westalis.

"I don't know if we'd be able to see her, Anya," he said quickly. Almost like he caught himself saying something he shouldn't have. "She isn't a professional cosplayer so I don't think she has a meet and greet schedule."

"But I'm sure there are other really fun things we can see. Right, Loid?" I interjected.

"Of course. There's a doll shop I think you might like to visit, so I'm going to see if we can set up a tour for tomorrow. Then we can go try some places to eat or even go to the beach."

"Wait, we don't have a plan?"

Loid shook his head. "There's a festival in a few days I thought we could check out, but other than that I thought we could just wing it."

Did he say we could just wing it? When have we ever winged anything? I stared at the man pretending to be my husband. That's the only explanation I can come up with because this man driving the car has no plans and wants to "wing it". Loid would never.

"What?" he chuckled.

"Oh nothing. Just wondering who you are and what you did with my husband."

"This is a fake Papa?!" Anya gasped.

"I am not a fake Papa," he smiled. "I'm just trying to be more…flexible."

"I'm flexible, Papa! I can touch my toes in PE!"

"Very good, Anya. Stretching is very important before physical activities."

"Hm, I'll keep that in mind," I mumbled to myself. Suddenly, the car swerved a little. "Loid! What's going on?"

"Sorry! Sorry! I, um, I thought I saw something in the road," Loid stuttered. "Anyway, was there anything you wanted to do while we're here?"

"Nothing in particular. I've never left Ostania so I'm not really sure what the world has to offer, but I'd love to see it. I'd love to see anything or go anywhere as long as I have you by my side."

I let out a gasp as I covered my mouth. Did I just say that outloud? I don't mean to sound too eager. I could see him smirking in the corner of my eye. I turned back toward the window, hoping he didn't see me blush. He does that a lot and I think he really enjoys it.

The ride to our housing took about 45 minutes to an hour and was mostly a scenic route. It actually looked rather secluded. There was a single dirt road surrounded by trees that nearly hid the path. If you didn't know exactly where you were going, you could easily get lost. We reached a gate, the walls hidden between the thick tree brush, and Loid retrieved a small remote from the envelope. When he pressed the button, the gate slowly opened.

I forgot to breathe when I saw what was on the other side. I had been sure we had been driving through a never ending forest, but the trees eventually gave way to a plot of land with a single home beside a sparkling lake. On the other side of the lake were those glorious snow capped mountains we had seen earlier. The home beside the lake looked more on the modern side, but had significant traditional Japanese construction. It was likely made for the comfort of foreigners while still keeping the essence of the culture of this beautiful country.

"We need to remove our shoes in the genkan when we enter the home," Loid said as he unloaded the luggages from the car.

"The what?" I asked.

"Genkan. That's what the entryway is called where we remove our shoes. It's something they do in most Asian countries. It's a sign of respect to the owner of the home and to keep the floors clean."

Anya bolted into the house as soon as the door was unlocked. The genkan was a step lower than the rest of the home. There were three pairs of slippers on the higher level right next to the entry. Anya sat on the floor and yanked her shoes off. She was about to take off to explore the house, but Loid caught her by the collar.

"Slow down young lady," he insisted. "You are to put your shoes together and line them up properly so no one trips on them."

"Sorry Papa," Anya apologised. She gathered her shoes and lined them up beside mine and Loid's. "Can I explore?"

"Let's get you settled in first." He picked up her luggages and headed further into the home.

The living room was right off the entrance of the home. A wall separated the kitchen and dining room from the living space. There was another door next to the dining area. Loid walked over and took a peek in.

"This looks like it's Anya's room," he said as he switched on the light.

Anya went running into the room with Bond in tow. "Wow!" she squealed excitedly. "Mama, look! I have my own TV!"

"That's amazing, Anya! Maybe we can have a movie night with just the two of us while we're here," I smiled.

"Yes! Sorry, Papa: No boys allowed."

Loid rolled his eyes as he brought in her bags. "That's fine with me. Would you like me to unpack for you?"

Anya shook her head. "No, I can do it myself." She looked over at the closet then at her bag.

"Leave the dresses to hang on the desk and I will take care of them later. Your bathroom is right through that door."

"Your own bathroom! You must be very excited, Anya!" I said excitedly.

Anya's face scrunched. Not exactly the reaction I would have thought she'd have.

"There's only one more door because the one next to mine is for the bathroom too," she stated. "Where's Mama's room?"

"Your mother is staying in a room with me," Loid replied casually.

We've been sharing a room for the last week, but we were all the way across the house this time. A space nearly as big as our entire apartment separating us from Anya. No house guests. No little brother to interrupt us if we decided to…

"Mama's sweating," Anya stated.

I can't explain what happened next. My body tensed up and the room suddenly started to spin. Is it hot in here? Why am I so dizzy? Oh I don't feel too well…

"Yor!"

Crying. I can hear crying. Who is that? I tried to open my eyes and sit up, but the moment I did my head started to spin. My vision was still blurry, but Loid's face slowly started to come into view. He looked so worried.

"Hey," he said softly, "take it easy. Don't over exert yourself."

"What happened?" I asked groggily.

"You passed out. I'm guessing it's from exhaustion."

"I heard crying."

"That would be Anya. She got scared and is posted outside the door." He sighed as he scratched his head. "This is my fault. We did a lot of traveling the last day and a half and you haven't had a proper meal in all that time. Such a foolish mistake. I'm an idiot."

Had we been traveling that long? I was so enthralled by all the new things surrounding me I didn't realize how long it had been. Plus being on the plane, I couldn't really tell if it was night or day. I took a few naps, but nothing too long. Also, when was the last time we ate a full meal? I packed enough snacks and sandwiches to last Anya the train ride and most of the flight, but I only snacked here and there. Did Loid even eat at all? How am I the only one exhausted and starving?

I cupped Loid's in my hand and brought his head up so we were eye to eye. "This is not your fault, Loid," I assured. "I pushed myself to the limit - not you. I was just too excited to see all the new things."

"We only took a plane and drove…"

"I told you, I've never left Ostania before. This is all new to me." I looked around the room and suddenly realized I was in a very large bed in a very large bedroom. "Speaking of new things…where am I?"

"Oh, this is our room," Loid replied.

The bed was huge, nearly twice as large as the one I have at home. The white sheets were soft against my skin and the comforter was as fluffy as a puff of cloud. On one wall there was a large window with a thin, white curtain pulled as heavier curtains were tied back on either side of the window. There was a door slightly ajar and I could see it lead to a restroom. I also noticed there was a sliding wooden door with thick white sheets instead of glass, but it was on the same side that would have led to the end of the house. Loid followed my gaze then looked back at me.

"Curious?" he asked with a grin. "Come on, I'll show you."

He took my hand and led me toward the mysterious door. He slid the door open to reveal another room. In the middle of the room was a giant tub, steam danced off the top of the water. One of the walls was completely open, giving way to a view of the lake and mountains outside. It was breathtaking.

"It's a rotenburo," Loid explained. "There's a hot spring upstream that feeds this tub. We do have a regular one inside, but I'd suggest trying this one out. Especially since your body seems exhausted from all the traveling. It'll do you good to relax while I get dinner ready."

I looked back at him with a brow raised. "Right now?"

He nodded his head. "There are robes hanging right over here by that bench along with some towels. This is a private property, so there's no worries about onlookers, but if you're still worried about being too exposed I can draw the privacy screen."

I shook my head. "It…it's ok. I mean, no one will see me right?"

"No one will see you," he chuckled as he kissed my temple. "Take as long as you need."

His footsteps receded as he closed the sliding door. I undressed and carefully stepped into this gigantic tub before me. The water was hotter than I was used to, but it felt nice against my aching body. I looked around at my surroundings. This all seemed like a scene right out of a romance novel. A steamy tub with a picture perfect view that I can share with my husband at any moment. It was too good to be true. Just like the rest of this trip.

Despite the water's temperature, I shuddered a little. I still can't shake the feeling that something just isn't right. The gates both surrounding this property and the air strip were obviously constructed to be hidden from view - buried in the beauty this country had to offer. The way the flight and landing crew only spoke to Loid was odd as well. And why were our accommodation plans handed to him in an envelope? It was like he didn't even know where we would be headed until the moment we arrived. It was almost as if we were on the run…

No. What am I thinking? Who would we be running from? Loid is a psychiatrist. A beloved member of our community. Everyone that has ever met him has become enhanced by his charm. Other than Yuri, I can't think of a soul who dislikes him. He was a kind man that couldn't make an enemy if he tried. Still, this nagging feeling that he didn't want anyone to know where we were refused to relent. I sunk deeper into the warm water as conflicting thoughts filled my head, hoping the water flowing in this tub would burn away these doubtful thoughts.

Loid Forger is a good man. He is my husband and I trust him. Loid Forger is a good man. He is my husband and I trust him.

I repeated the order in my head like prayer. It is what I believe…Right?

"You're upset! I know you are, don't lie to me," I whined as I tugged on his sleeve.

"I'm not lying. You won't even let me say a word!" he stuttered.

Seriously. After all this time, how is he still so nervous around me? I figured when we started dating he would loosen up a bit, but I was wrong. My sweet, adorable, super cute Gojo was still a nervous wreck. Actually, I think he may have become more nervous now that everyone knows we're dating.

I didn't mean to tell that reporter about us. They kept talking about me and how I made these characters come to life, but I couldn't have done any of this without Gojo. I just wanted him to have the credit and praise he deserves. One thing led to another and suddenly they wanted to interview and photograph him. Naturally, he politely declined and begged them not to mention him in the article but they did it anyway. It's one thing for our friends and family to know, but the world?

"Are you upset? For real, Gojo. Are you?" I asked.

"I'm not mad," he sighed. "I just…wasn't expecting people to be so brazen coming up to me."

He had this dejected look on his face. Ever since the article came out, random people have come up to him asking some pretty…personal questions. When he came over yesterday, he looked really upset. I asked him what was wrong, but he was adamant about not talking about it. I know people can say some really nasty things to other people when they're jealous or simply don't want to believe something is true. I really hope no one has said anything to Gojo. He already has problems connecting with people and something like that wouldn't help at all.

I rose on my tippy toes and pulled him down a little to place a kiss on his cheek.

"Don't you let those butt heads get to you," I said. "It doesn't matter if they don't understand us. All that matters is we get us. Does that make sense?"

"Not really, but thank you," he smiled. It's cute how red he gets at the simplest things.

"How's the new costume coming?"

He let out a sigh as he retrieved the pink dress from his closet. "It's harder than I thought it would be," he admitted. "I was able to find a few episodes of the show online, but honestly…the animation is really crude and outdated so getting this dress to look like something that isn't a Halloween store mass production is much more difficult than I thought."

He stared at the dress with a frown. He was really wracking his brain with this one. He rarely was dissatisfied with his work, but we also knew very little about this cartoon called Spy Wars. I was invited to a week-long convention and for the first time, artists and producers from the small countries of Ostania and Westalis were attending. They had reached out to Gojo (they thought he was my manager) and expressed their interest in meeting with me. We researched the two countries. Apparently, they're actually rival countries that are finally coming to true peace terms. They primarily spoke English so we have been practicing non-stop. I'll be cosplaying a bunch of different characters, but we made sure to fit in Princess Honey from their Spy Wars cartoon. She's basically an even more plain version of Princess Peach from Mario games.

I walked up behind Gojo and wrapped my arms around him, resting my forehead against his back. "Don't overwork yourself over this," I whispered. "I'm sure they'll be honored either way."

"I know they will," he sighed. I felt the warmth of his hands on top of mine. "I just want it to be perfect. You deserve nothing less."

"You think too highly of me sometimes, Wakana Gojo."

"No, I just really lo…" Gojo was interrupted by the shrill of the shop phone going off. "Oh, I should get that. I'll be right back."

The moment he pulled from my grasp I felt the pang of loss. Wakana Gojo isn't one for displays of affection - not in public…or private. He gets nervous and jittery. He stutters when he gets embarrassed. It's almost like he's ashamed of his feelings. Instead, he shows me his love by giving his all in each costume he's created for me. The way he looks at me when he sees me in them…it's like I'm the only other person in the world. The only one he has eyes for. That's enough for me. Still, it would be nice to hear him say he loves me a little more.

A girl can only dream right?

"Gojo Dolls."

I could hear his voice from the other room. It amazes me that he can juggle making my costumes, school, and helping in the shop. I barely pay attention in class.

"Yes sir, we're available for a tour. The kashira-shi will be out until Wednesday. If you don't mind me, I could show you around and maybe you can come back when he returns? Will also be having an open house for the festival and you're welcome to meet him then. Perfect! I just need your name. Ok, we'll see you tomorrow, Mr. Forger."