Adventure Time with Finn, Jake, & Rachel
Chapter 18: The Duke
After a supposed morning of strangling some elderly-destroying pixies from Mount Cragdor, Finn, Jake, and Rachel are now in the Candy Kingdom, laughing while throwing bottles at a nearby wall as balloons apparently flew in the air, laughing happily.
"Here, try throwing this one.", Jake said, handing Finn a bottle.
But once Finn threw the bottle and it broke, a purple demon-like vapor appeared from it with a roar and vanished. Then, Jake picked up an orange bottle.
"Here's one called Caturday Surprise.", Jake said.
"Well, don't keep us in suspense, Jake. Show us how it works!", Rachel spoke eagerly.
Then, Jake threw the bottle. Once it broke from hitting the wall, green, pink, and blue cats exploded out of it. The trio started laughing. But a moment later, their laughter ceased once they heard Princess Bubblegum, never mind in a bad mood.
"Yeah, go on, get out of here! Unless you feel like a fist cookie, you better keep runnin'!", Bubblegum shouted as a familiar figure ran away and hid behind a nearby tree trunk from Princess Bubblegum, who was standing at the entrance of the Candy Kingdom.
"Wait a minute... That's the Duke of Nuts...!", Rachel realized.
"What the heck is goin' on?", Finn puzzled.
"I have no idea. But it's probably best to stay out of it.", Jake advised.
But Rachel wasn't too sure about it.
"Hmm...", Rachel began.
Then, she noticed a bottle shaped like a boomerang and another bottle, which had a rather round shape, even rounder than a beaker, the latter of which Rachel picked up.
"Oh, look! More bottles. Mine looks so big and round. Even rounder than a beaker.", Rachel grinned.
"Whoa. Bet this one might blow up like a bomb. Mine looks stupid.", Finn said, picking up the boomerang-shaped bottle.
"Let's see how it flies!", Finn said before throwing the bottle.
When he did, it grabbed Rachel's bottle, missed the wall, and flew away.
"Hey!", Rachel exclaimed.
"Aw, lame.", Finn commented before the bottle, as well as the other one that was nabbed, began to turn around and fly back at the others.
"Huh?", Finn puzzled.
Both bottles flew up and went in through a window of the Candy Castle, shattering it and hitting someone. Rachel gasped from the sound.
"Uh-oh...", Jake said.
"That doesn't sound good...", Rachel said while inhaling sharply with a wince.
"I hope those bottles didn't hit anyone.", Finn said.
But the voice that spoke up next only proved otherwise.
"Duke of Nuts!", Princess Bubblegum yelled as she looked out of the window, her skin now green and her head only bald on the left and right sides, resembling a slight mohawk.
"WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?!", Bubblegum roared as the Duke of Nuts peeped from the tree trunk and then ran away in panic.
"Oh, crubs! She thinks the Duke of Nuts did it...!", Rachel groaned in worry.
"We gotta go clear up what happened!", Finn urged.
Moments later, inside the room with the shattered window, Dr. Ice Cream was putting a thick rubber suit on Princess Bubblegum.
"Don't worry, my dear. I'll have you fixed up in no time!", Dr. Ice Cream assured.
Just then, Finn, Jake, and Rachel all ran into the room.
"Princess! Are you OK?", Finn asked.
"Yeah, I guess if green and bald is okay.", Bubblegum responded with slight sarcasm.
Finn gasped and Rachel gasped a bit in shock before Jake started to laugh. Finn and Rachel, especially Dr. Ice Cream, looked at Jake angrily and/or annoyedly on account of the fact that Bubblegum looked depressed from Jake's reaction.
"Oh, boy. I'm sorry! I can't stop now.", Jake laughed.
Rachel, however got a good look.
"Huh. Actually, you look more like you're green and have a bit of a mohawk.", Rachel stated.
"Really?", Bubblegum asked.
"Yeah. If Mar-Mar was here, she'd be digging that look. Heck, maybe try that out herself.", Rachel explained.
Of course, Bubblegum blushed in embarrassment.
"My dear, not to worry! The medicine milk in this suit will have you healed lickety-split! In just five days you'll be back to your beautiful bubble gummy self.", Dr. Ice Cream assured.
But Princess Bubblegum was panicked from hearing this.
"FIVE DAYS?! The Grand Meeting of Ooo Royalty is TONIGHT!", Princess Bubblegum shouted.
Suddenly, Bubblegum started to swell. Fortunately, it stopped just as quickly when the slight growth popped a hole in her suit. Dr. Ice Cream tried to cover it with her finger placed in said hole.
"Okay, what just happened?", Rachel asked.
"Uh... hey, Princess. There's something we should tell you about those bottles that hit you in the face.", Finn began.
"I already know, Finn! The Duke of Nuts has always been a bad guy. But now that he's done this, I'll NEVER forgive him! And it's not just because I hate the Duke! I'd never forgive anybody who did this to me! I'd hate them!", Bubblegum angrily ranted.
"Yeah but-", Finn began.
"FOREVER!", Bubblegum added, interrupting Finn, who put his hand on his shocked face as Rachel gasped.
"Forever?!", Finn and Rachel squeaked.
"Finally. I have a witness to his misdeeds!", Bubblegum shouted.
"Three witnesses!", Jake corrected.
"Jake!", Finn and Rachel scolded fearfully before Finn and Rachel got squeezed into a hug by Bubblegum.
"Oh, Finn and Rae-Rae, my flawless, flawless champions! Bring the Duke of Nuts to justice. The justice of a cold dungeon!", Princess Bubblegum requested crazily before laughing just as hysterically as her body began to swell and enlarge again, causing more holes to pop in her suit, urging Dr. Ice Cream to rush over to try and stop the leaks.
Nervous as she was, Rachel saw what was happening.
"Wait a minute... How is her body doing that?", Rachel puzzled.
Finn and Jake laughed nervously.
"Heheh. She's completely bonkers.", Jake commented.
"Well, right now, you're not wrong...", Rachel winced before she, Finn, and Jake ducked down for a huddle.
"What do I do? If we tell her we threw them, she'll hate us forever!", Finn whispered in worry.
"Don't worry! That won't happen. We're gonna catch that Duke!", Jake assured, elbowing Finn lightly.
"But we're the ones who threw the bottles!", Finn said in panicked retortion.
"And we still don't even know what's causing her body to swell like that.", Rachel added.
"Dude, look. The Duke of Nuts is bad guys.", Jake said, pressing his hands on Finn's face and then going to the other side before moving his arms away.
"How do you know that?", Finn and Rachel asked in unison.
"Think about it. If Bubblegum hates him so much, then he must have done some rotten stuff. I mean, maybe he even threw a bottle and turned someone ugly before.", Jake explained, hopping on his head.
"Maybe you're right.", Finn guessed.
"Maybe I am!", Jake responded.
"Or you're wrong. Again. Remember the last time we had a dilemma like that? You thought Ricardio was good, but Finn knew better, especially since he was my Dad's heart. Besides, I know that guy. Mar-Mar and I've been at his castle for his 2nd son's birthday. And did you see how the Duke looked when we first saw him? He looked too panicked to throw a potion. None of us even saw him carrying a bottle. He's too nice a guy to do that.", Rachel responded.
"Prob'ly 'cause he's guilty.", Jake said.
"That's debatable.", Rachel argued.
"All right, then. Just this once, we'll be vigilantes!", Finn said.
"What?", Rachel asked in slight shock.
"Nah, we're more like cops. Crooked cops!", Jake argued before he made a gun with his fingers and pretended to shoot something.
"Ahh...! Well, if you guys are off doing that, at least see for yourself if he seemed evil enough to do it first. In the meantime, I'll tend to Bubblegum and see if I can come up with something to help the antidote run its course much faster.", Rachel said, earning Finn's grunt with a nod.
"Princess! I won't rest until the villainous duke is captured!", Finn vowed.
"Oh, thank you, Finn!", Finn thanked with a creepy smile before laughing maniacally.
"Whoa. Okay, and by then, hopefully, Rae-Rae'll have taken care of...this.", Finn said as he moved his hand over his face before leaving.
Rachel then began to rub her in the shoulders, calming her down from her crazy laughter.
"Okay, there, Bonnie. Calm down. No need to get all crazy bonkers, here."
Later, at the Duke of Nuts' castle, Finn and Jake walked towards it.
"Look yonder! The Duke of Nuts castle!", Finn called.
Then, he and Jake kicked open the door, barging in.
"Duke of Nuts!", Finn shouted.
"How are you?", Jake greeted.
"By order of Princess...", Finn began.
Then, the Duchess of Nuts turned around in a chair by the fireplace in the room where Finn and Jake barged in, except that her head wasn't facing forwards.
"Um, Princess...", Finn began.
The Duchess of Nuts then suddenly turned her head around 180 degrees to face Finn, who gasped.
"Hello, Finn. Are you here to arrest the Duke?", Duchess of Nuts asked.
"How did you know?", Finn asked.
The Duchess then grabbed a bowl of nuts as she replied before setting the bowl down.
"The nuts told me...for I am the Duchess of Nuts!"
Jake then walked over to the bowl and started eating the nuts from it before stopping in realization.
"Oh... should've asked if these were, like, her eggs or something.", Jake realized.
"I know of my husband's crime against the princess. A crime that you personally witnessed! And why would you lie? Huh?"
"Yeah, why?", Finn asked, nervously.
"Oh, but he was once such a wonderful man! He'd pet dogs, kissed babies; we'd lie together underneath the cashew bush. He even taught under-privileged nuts how to dance. There was even the time he brought you, Marceline, and her blue ice princess friend over for our 2nd son's birthday. But somehow he's gone rancid! These nuts tell me he must be executed. Would you like to hear what my nuts have to say?!", the duchess exclaimed, shedding tears at one point as she said what the nuts supposedly required before turning around in a bit of fury.
"That won't be...um...necessary.", Finn said nervously before backing away as the Duchess started running after them.
"Listen! Listen!", the Duchess beckoned before Finn ran out, grabbing Jake.
Once outside the castle, Finn closed the door behind him.
"I don't get it, Jake. How can the dude be evil if he pets puppies, kisses babies, and lies with his wife? Heck, Rae-Rae and I even went there with Marceline.", Finn asked.
"What?! You believe that? She is nuts. Listen, man. Let's just go back and face the music. Who cares if Bubblegum hates you forever? It's no biggie. Tons of people hate me.", Jake suggested.
Actually, so far, only one person hates him. And that one person was in a forest near the castle. He turned out to be a squirrel reading some kind of newspaper in a hologram.
"Why, Jake? Why won't you print my letters? I...I...I HATE YOU!", the squirrel shouted, swiping his hand across the hologram.
Meanwhile, back at the Candy Kingdom, Rachel was cleaning up the mess when she noticed the label for one of the potions that was accidentally flung at Bubblegum.
"Uh-oh.", Bonnie said before throwing the other broken pieces away, but leaving the label alone.
"Okay, Bonnie. I think I may know something about why you're swelling and growing.", Rachel said.
"Why's that?", Bonnie asked.
"Because you've been getting too excited. Every time you show excitement of any kind, you grow bigger and larger.", Rachel explained.
"I do?", Bonnie puzzled.
Then, she started to realize something.
"Wait a minute... Come to think of it, that sounds like one of the potions I asked you and the others to get rid of.", Bubblegum said.
Rachel began to get nervous.
"Uh..., yeah. It is.", Rachel said nervously.
"Rae-Rae, what's wrong? You look like you're hiding something.", Bonnie asked.
Rachel grunted, momentarily trying her level best not to spill until...
"Gah, okay! Princess, I have something sucky to confess on Finn's behalf AND mine. Princess..., the Duke wasn't the one who threw those bottles. It was both Finn AND me.", Rachel replied.
"WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT?!", Bonnie shouted with a gasp prior.
This caused Bonnie to swell and grow, causing the milk suit to tear and burst off, not only revealing her big, chubby body, clothed in a sort of bikini-like swimsuit undergarment set, thank goodness, but also her body covered with some slight milk.
"You two did that?! Why?", Bonnie asked.
"Princess, I'm so sorry; it... it was an accident. We never meant for that to happen. We wanted to tell you, but then you ranted about how you'd never forgive anyone who did this to you. Like, ANGRILY ranted.", Rachel said.
"Rae-Rae..., you really thought that I'd hate you and Finn forever?", Bonnie asked.
"Well, I don't. Not completely, at least. But Finn did. You have to admit, you were pretty intense with the ranting.", Rachel said.
Bonnie thought it over as she put her fingers on her double-chin.
"Well... I couldn't stay mad at Finn or you forever. And you did seem genuinely penitent.", Bonnie said.
"I'm sure Finn would, too. If and when he confesses like I did. You're gonna be okay like this?", Rachel assured.
"Well, seeing as I do have a green mohawk like you said, I'm sure I can manage somehow. Besides, I think I could really start liking this huge body.", Bonnie grinned.
"So, I guess that means you'll fit right in at my Big Belly Club?", Rachel smirked a bit, making Bonnie blush a bit before giggling. "But first, tell me more about this club of yours."
Back to Finn and Jake, the former noticed a figure running past Finn and Jake.
"It's him! The Duke of Nuts!", Finn shouted before he and Jake ran after him.
"I'll break left! You take the right!", Finn said as he ran.
Then, both of them went in their direction. Finn tackled him before Jake jumped over them.
"I went left too!", Jake shouted before they both fell on the figure from before.
"Wha-?", Finn puzzled, picking him up. "Oh! You must be the duke's first son, right?"
"No one will harm the Duke of Nuts! I will kill whoever seeks to arrest him!", the first son threatened as a nut mask popped off him, revealing a small nut head with what appeared to be small hair on it.
Suddenly, the Duke of Nuts walked out of the forest, speaking up.
"No! Please! This has gone far enough!", the Duke shouted.
"Hey, Duke of Nuts.", Jake greeted.
"But I vowed to kill whoever did this to you. They can't take you away, Dad!", the first son said before crying as his father then hugged him.
"Who's the toughest little nut? That's you.", the Duke said as the Marquis of Nuts continued to cry into the Duke of Nuts' shoulder; he even put one finger up to Finn and Jake. "One second."
Finn used his hands to ask if they should walk away. The Duke of Nuts thumbed them up in confirmation and the duo walked away.
"Man, I don't know, Jake. Maybe Rae-Rae's right. Why would Princess Bubblegum hate him if he's such a nice guy?", Finn asked.
"Just because he's a good father, doesn't necessarily mean he isn't a villain.", Jake retorted.
"That doesn't look like a villain.", Finn said, pointing out to Jake that right now, the Duke of Nuts was putting his cape down for geese to walk across so they don't get wet.
"I can probably think of a reason why that's villainous if you gave me enough time. Maybe.", Jake said.
Nevertheless, Finn saw no use trying to avoid this decision.
"Ugh! Maybe we should just confess. But then, Princess Bubblegum will hate us forever.", Finn groaned sadly, limping down, unaware of what had transpired in the candy kingdom between the two princesses.
"Hey man, it's not that bad being hated.", Jake assured as a letter flew near his foot.
"C'mon man, pick it up!", the squirrel pleaded.
But Finn and Jake walked by it, unnoticed.
"You son of a bleeblop!", the squirrel spoke, miffed at the ignorance.
"Oh! Sorry to make you wait. I made these daisy crowns for you guys as a- as a token of gratitude for waiting.", the Duke offered before Finn and Jake put the crowns on.
Suddenly, the Duke felt winded in the head.
"Oh...sorry I...I have to sit down for a second. I know this is an odd question, but you wouldn't happen to have any pudding on you, would you?", the Duke asked.
"Actually, yeah. I think I have one in my pack.", Finn replied, handing the pudding cup over to him.
"Oh, thank goodness.", the Duke said, opening the pudding cup.
"I think I have a spoon in here too- wha-?", Finn said, stunned all of a sudden.
It turned out that the Duke of Nuts had already eaten all of the pudding, some of which is smeared on his face.
"What happened to the cup?", Jake asked.
The Duke took it out of his mouth and put it in Jake's hand as if it were a reply.
"Oh, I'm so embarrassed! Now you know my shame. I can't stop eating pudding.", the Duke said ashamedly.
"What?!", Finn shouted.
"I don't tell people because I hate making them worry, but yes, I have a rare condition. A pudding deficiency. And I always end up eating all of the royal pudding supply whenever I go to the castle."
"So that's why Princess Bubblegum hates you!", Finn realized.
"Yes, but I didn't turn Princess Bubblegum green and bald! I would never do such a thing!", the Duke said.
"First of all, she's not bald. She actually has more of a mohawk.", Finn responded.
"Really?", the Duke asked.
"Yes. And secondly, gah! Of course you wouldn't! You're too nice a guy. Rae-Rae and I are the ones who threw those bottles. We were gonna tell her, but then- she started talking all crazy- she said she'd never forgive me and I- I didn't know!", Finn added.
"Hey, it's okay. People make mistakes. It's all part of growing up and you never truly stop growing.", the Duke happily assured nicely.
"Now you're making me feel even worse by being so nice about it.", Finn only said sadly.
"Maybe I should just confess the crime and end all of this.", the Duke said sadly.
"Wait...I think I might have an idea that will save everyone's reputations.", Finn said.
Little did he know that Rachel and Bonnie have their own ideas. First off, they began by mixing some liquids, one of which was a sample of her blood affected by the two potions. There, they began to use some more science equipment to shift some molecules the right way and mix the formula with the healing milk the right way. Once that was done, they administered it into a pipe leading to the shower head.
"Well, looks like there's only one way to know if it works.", Bubblegum said before she entered the shower and turned the shower head on, causing it to rain down some altered healing milk just as Dr. Ice Cream entered, surprised at what's going on.
"Hey, Dr. Ice Cream. You're just in time.", Rachel said.
At that point, the formula raining down on Bonnie was already causing her to appear halfway normal with her hair turning back to a pink color.
"Yes...! It's working!", Bonnie grinned.
But in her excitement, she wound up swelling again, almost enough to be stuck as her belly and chest are squished against the door while her backside is squished against the wall, earning her surprise mid-growth and after the growth, a disgruntled groan. Seeing this, Rachel thought of an idea to help cheer the princess up. So, she used her tiara to grow to the same size PB is and press her front side against the door in front of Bubblegum.
"Mind if I act as your reflection?", Rachel asked, making Bonnie giggle, despite her current situation.
Even Dr. Ice Cream was starting to laugh.
"I don't know how she does it...!", Dr. Ice Cream said, laughing.
Next, the two princesses were now working on a monitor that can broadcast the Grand Meeting live. Once put together (and pieced together), they were now putting the finishing touches on it.
"Are you sure this'll work, Rachel?", Bonnie asked.
"It will work. I'll be sure to run it by BMO when we get to the tree house later.", Rachel said.
"Well, if you're sure...", Bonnie shrugged.
Later that night, Peppermint Butler was driving both Rachel and Princess Bubblegum (now looking much closer to normal), currently in an equally large size as their front ends were touching each other, around in a mobile bath tub filled with healing milk.
"Thank you for modifying the formula, Rae-Rae.", Bonnie thanked.
"You're welcome, Bonnie. So, you finding this size okay?", Rachel asked.
"Even better! It's like we both perfectly fit in the shape of this pool.", Bonnie grinned.
"I'm surprised we haven't busted it up yet. So, let's not tempt fate anymore than we already are and just stay calm for now.", Rachel advised.
"I just can't wait for your club later tonight.", Bonnie grinned.
"Yeah. Me, neither.", Rachel grinned.
"I just can't believe what that tranch of a Magic Man put you and Finn through.", Bonnie said.
"Well, it's not all bad. I could always turn back to normal with my tiara. Besides, if it's any consolation, my mom sure whooped that magic man's butt. He'll definitely think twice before messing with us Petrikovs now.", Rachel said.
"Let's hope he does.", Bonnie said, giggling at the thought of the pummeling Magic Man went through as his punishment.
Suddenly, Finn jumped out of the forest and stopped them.
"Halt!", Finn shouted.
"Aah! Oh. Hey, Finn.", Rachel greeted.
"Did you find the duke yet?", Bonnie asked.
"Not yet, but you are in grave danger, Princess. There is an assassin in these very woods, dead set on stopping you and Rae-Rae from reaching the Grand Meeting.", Finn said.
"Really? An assassin?", Rachel asked.
"Yes. In fact, what's that rustling in the bush?", Finn asked.
Jake spoke up behind a bush while shaking it.
"Rustle. Rustle, rustle.", Jake said before he suddenly jumped out, dressed as a ninja with a black mask.
"I'm an ambush! Halt!"
"What's going on?!", Finn shouted.
"Oh, did I come out too early?", Jake asked, out of character.
Finn gave a slight cough to clear his throat.
"What are you here to do, stranger?", Finn asked.
"I've come for the princess. I'm an assassin!", Jake said.
"Um, guys?", Bonnie began.
"Stand back! I will stop him! Hi-yah!", Finn shouted before leaping up.
"What are we looking at here, exactly?", Rachel added.
"Hi-yah!", Jake shouted as he, too, leapt.
The two jumped into the air and pretended to fight for a couple of seconds.
"I'll kill you! And raise your children as my own!", Jake acted.
They still pretended to fight until Jake actually punched Finn into a nearby rock.
"Finn!", Rachel said in slight worry.
"Remember, it's just acting, Jake!", Finn groaned.
"Sorry, dude!", Jake apologized as he ran towards Bubblegum, kicked Peppermint Butler to the side, and stretched right in front of her and Rachel.
"Now, to kill you up. But wait! Surely this cannot be the fair Princess Bubblegum! Where are her pink..., flush cheeks? And the long..., gooey hair...?", Jake puzzled, noticing that Bonnie is almost back to normal.
"Uhh...", Jake began before turning to Finn.
"Dude, help me out. What do I do?", Jake whispered.
"Well, there's one idea. How about YOU get OFF!", Bonnie shouted as she pushed Jake off onto the ground.
"Ouch! Clearly, the princess travels e...", Jake began.
"Yeah, you can stop now. No one believes what's happening here.", Rachel said.
Finn and Jake gasped in shock from this.
"All right, Duke. You can come out now.", Rachel said.
"Nuttin's going my way today.", the Duke said.
"Finn, can you explain what's going on here? And why isn't the duke clapped in irons?!", Bonnie asked.
Try as he might, he knew something had to be done. And so...
"The duke didn't throw that bottle! Ahh- Princess, I have something sucky to confess. I'm the one who threw the bottle.", Finn confessed.
"I know, Finn.", Bonnie said.
"What?! You do?", Finn asked.
"Rachel told me. I know you didn't mean to throw those bottles at me on purpose. And she's right. You seem genuinely penitent.", Bonnie responded.
"I don't even know what that means, but thank you!", Finn thanked.
"We'll talk later.", Rachel said.
The Duke of Nuts even laughed with Jake in relief.
"But that doesn't douse my hatred for the duke!", Bonnie shouted, pointing her finger at the Duke.
"Yeah, what's up with that hate?", Finn asked.
"That jerk always empties out my pudding pantry!", Bonnie replied vehemently.
"Aw, shucks. He just can't control himself around pudding. He goes cocoa-nuts for it! Because he has a pudding deficiency!", Finn said.
"What? Pudding deficiency?", Rachel puzzled before remembering something. "Oh, yeah! I remember reading about that."
"You do?", Bonnie asked.
"Yeah. It was while we were working on... our projects.", Rachel whispered.
"Really?", Bonnie asked before Rachel nodded.
"It's true, your majesty. I'm sorry for my medical condition.", the Duke apologized.
Bubblegum groaned just as begrudgingly as before.
"All right. I guess you're forgiven.", Bonnie sighed.
Finn sighed to Bonnie.
"I'm really sorry about making you temporarily ugly, Princess. Especially before the Grand Meeting of Ooo Royalty. I wish there was some way to make it up to you."
Bonnie placed her fingers on her plush cheeks as she responded.
"Maybe there is, Finn. Maybe there is..."
Suddenly, she spotted Finn and Jake walking away, especially while whistling.
"Hey!"
"Hmm, what? You said maybe.", Finn said.
"Well, that 'maybe' is gonna turn into a 'definitely', because we have an idea that could solve everything on both ends.", Rachel responded.
A/N: And this is where the next chapter of "Adventure Time: The Big Belly Club" would take place.