Childhood Friend Route Victory (High School DxD - Irina Shidou SI Chapter 1)

Issei Hyoudou. Renowned pervert, boob obsessed idiot, and wannabe self-proclaimed future Harem King was currently having the best day of his life.

He was asked out and went on a date. With an actual real life girl. He didn't fall asleep playing gal games or hentai games again.

"Issei, can you do me a favor?" His girlfriend-he had to push down his smile, so as not to look stupid whenever he thought that-Yuuma Amano asked.

Is it now? Has the moment come!? Issei tried not to show his excitement.

It was the end of the date. They were standing next to a fountain in the park at sunset. It was the perfect moment for the End of the Date Event!

The Kiss.

"Y-Yeah, sure anything!" Issei said through his nervousness.

"Will you die for me?"

"...Huh?" Issei blinked at Yuuma just said that with a smile, the look in her eyes were...different now. Less kind. "Sorry, can you say that again?" Surely he heard wrong.

"Will you die for me?" Yuuma said again with that disturbing smile.

"Yuuma-chan, that's not funny." Issei tried to say lightheartedly.

Only for Yuuma to transform. Black wings sprouted from her back, her form aged a bit, going form cute high school girl, to young woman in a dominatrix outfit. And her boobs were bigger.

Light also gathered in her hand, and a menacing red spear appeared in it.

Issei barely had time to widen his eyes, as Yuuma drew her hands back.

"ISSEI, CLOSE YOUR EYES!" Someone, with an oddly familiar voice shouted.

Issei heard some kind of click and a bomb, and on instinct he crouched down covering his head, and closing his eyes.

It was a flash bomb that went off.

And the black-winged Yuuma was screaming bloody murder.

Issei cautiously opened his eyes and looked up to see...a few water balloons were thrown.

"As if that'll do anything you trash!" An angry Yuuma, created another red light spear and slashed the balloon, only for the contents inside to splash on her.

The Fallen Angel began to scream as the Holy Acid began to eat through her face and skin, smoke rising out of where she was soaked.

"Issei, keep you head down." The female voice from said.

Issei looked toward the voice to see a teenage girl with chestnut hair styled in twintails-AND IS THAT A MACHINE GUN! Issei shouted in his thoughts.

"In the name of the Lord, BEGONE THOT!" The twintail opened fire.

"Hey, Issei, it's been a long time, remember me?" Said the crazy in some modified nun outfit, Issei noted now that he had time to calm down.

Not that he could really relax, as said crazy girl, who was holding the strap of her machine gun over her shoulder, was half covered in the blood of his dead ex-girlfriend. Who had tried to kill him and was probably some youkai thing with black wings.

"I, um, uuh..." He didn't want to piss off the crazy nun, but he really didn't know her.

"And of course, you don't recognize me. It's Shidou Irina." The girl, his childhood friend, introduced herself. Issei's eyes widened in recognition.

"Wait, wait, wait, Irina! Y-You..." Issei looked her up and down and... Holy Oppai. "You...grew up. Really grew up."

He still remembered when she told him that she's actually a girl before she left. He thought that was some elaborate prank, before his parents confirmed that she really was a girl.

Then Issei remembered what Irina told him as she left about marrying him when they meet again.

Ah, cute childhood friend promises. Issei looked at his grown up, and very mature body of his old friend once more. Shame that, that was just kids saying stuff, but let's be realistic, she's probably forgotten about all of that. More importantly thought...

"Irina, what's going on? Y-Yuuma..." Issei gestured with his head to the pile of...stuff that used to be Yuuma.

"Ah, right. So quick crash course. The Supernatural is real. Magic is real. Near all mythological beings, including gods and demons, even the various pantheons are real. Don't ask which creation myth is the real one." Irina said rapidly as she took a canister of...something, went and poured it over Yuuma's corpse.

"I wasn't going to... But now that you mention it-"

"Don't ask." She deadpanned, looking at his with a dry stare, as she took out a lighter and dropped it on Yuuma's corpse. A fired blazed out, and rapidly consumed the corpse, blood and gore, leaving nothing but ash, and a blackened spot.

"Okay."

"So to keep things focused on the important bits, the Biblical side of things is also real. Meaning Devils, Angels and Fallen Angels. While other factions or pantheons view those three as one group aptly named the Abrahamic Faction, or as they are colloquially known, the Three Factions. As the later name indicates, they're actually Three Factions." Irina said, then she did some...magic thing, as there was a small light show, and all the blood was gone, and her clothes looked good again.

"Following. Kinda, so far." Issei tried to just take everything thing in, but felt overwhelmed by everything happening, just a bit.

"Good. So the factions with Angels and the Biblical God, the Heaven Faction are technically my bosses' bosses. My bosses being the higher-ups of the Church. I say technically because the Church is too independent and while they are on humanity's side for the most part, they have some serious shady shit going for them. Problem is, there isn't really much of a faction that represents, or cares specifically about humans other than them." Irina said as she calmly took Issei's arm as they left the part.

"I...okay?"

"Thankfully the Three Factions aren't actively at war at the moment, and there isn't any faction that's actively antagonistic against mankind." Irina paused and frowned. "There are a lot that are passively antagonistic against humans though."

"Like...Yuuma?" Issei asked, started to get the picture somewhat.

"Yuuma, is a Fallen Angel. Her real name is Raynare. Fallen Angels belong to the Grigori, an organization led by one of the first Fallen, Azazel. Thing is, Azazel usually cares about studying Sacred Gears and not just kill their users right away. Oh and that's why that Fallen was after you, you have a Sacred Gear, a miracle superpower God gave humans at random, so they can protect themselves from dangerous monsters." Irina casually explained.

"I have superpowers?" Issei's eyes widened.

"Yep! Don't worry, I'll help you figure them out later. Now let's go meet your parents and get married like we promised." Irina said with a wide smile.

"Huh?" Issei froze. This... This can't be real, right? Am I dreaming?

Irina stopped walking to look at Issei in concern and confusion.

"What? We promised to get married when we meet again, and we can. We're both of age and just need permission from our guardians. Don't worry, I already got dad's signature." Irina happily explained.

Issei fainted.

Issei woke up to find himself back in his home's living room. He sat up to see Irina-Oh, so I really did meet Irina. That part wasn't a dream. Issei thought-sitting next to his parents, who were signing some papers.

"Yes, here and here, and your personal seal here." Irina said pointing at parts of the paper.

"Done!" Issei's dad, Gorou, said with a cheer as he pumped his fist in the air. His wife, took the papers and did her part too.

"And I'm done as well! Oh I'm so happy you're back, Irina-chan! Please look after our stupid son, and if you need anything, your mother-in-law is here to help." Issei's mom, Miki, said joyously.

"Oi, Issei, finally awake! How can you sleep when your beautiful wife is here!" Gorou reprimanded his son.

"Ah, I see. It really all is just a dream. This is a nice one though." Issei laid back down on the couch and turn to face away, to return to dream land.

"Wake up you stupid brat! You're not gonna ruin the one good thing in your life, despite your perversions, by being thick headed now!" Miki threw her sandal at Issei's head.

Issei sat up, rubbing his head. The pain was minimal, but it made him realize that this was real.

"This...this is...actually real." He said looking from his parents, to the beautiful smiling Irina.

"I maybe clumsy, but please look after me," Irina bowed slightly before looking up at Issei with love and devotion, that shot straight through his heart. "Darling~."

Ah, okay, this happiness is too much for me.

At that point, Issei's mind was just overloaded from everything, and opted to leave and see if this dream-like life would continue.

Issei fainted again.

While Issei was sleeping dreaming of his happy married life, Irina was busy cleaning up Kuoh Town from a crow infestation. And asshole priests.

Bangbangbangbangbangbangbangbangbang!

"AAAAAAAAH!"

"What the hell is she?! She came outta nowhere!"

The Stray Exorcists shouted.

Bangbangbangbangbangbangbangbangbang!

"Where the hell is Raynare!? Bitch didn't warn us about this!" Cried out Dohnaseek.

"IS THAT A FUCKING MINIGUN FIRING LIGHT BULLETS!?" Shouted Millet.

By the time the sun came up, the abandon church was in pieces and there were no more Fallen or Stray Exorcists in Kuoh Town.

It was the lunch break in Kuoh Academy, and some of the students of class 2-B were gathered around the newest student, Irina Hyoudou wanting to sate their curiosity on this new student. Why are they transferring now?

And of course what's their relation to Issei Hyoudou, the Oppai Pervet?

Among those observing this interaction from outside class, was one of the Devil Kings responsible for Kuoh Town, Rias Gremory.

Rias stared at the transferred Church Exorcist that transferred into their territory with barely any warning.

This Exorcist just simply arrived, sending a letter Rias Gremory and Sona Sitri, the Devil Co-Owners of Kuoh territory, two days ago saying the Church was investigating some Fallen Angel squad that targeted notable humans-likely meaning those with Sacred Gears-and had some Stray Exorcists with high priorities, such as Freed Sellzen.

But before Rias or Sona could even respond to the letter, the Exorcist Irina arrived, and dealt with the Fallen in their town. And then transferred to Kuoh Academy rather than leave.

Rias was still trying to find out what this Exorcist's goal was.

"Ah, so, Irina-san, are you, um actually related to Hyoudou-san?" Asked Murayama, one of the kendo club girls, that are used to being perverted on by the Perverted Trio, and punishing them.

"If he ever causes you any problem, don't hesitate at all to come to the kendo club!" Katase, Captain of the Girls' Kendo Club said reassuringly to Irina.

"Ah, I should probably explain that right away, so there isn't any misconception." Irina stood up as walked toward Issei whose seat was next to her. "I'm not related to Ise at all."

"Eh, not related?" Murayama asked confused.

"Wait, are you saying...!" Aika Kiryuu, residence female pervert, said as she quickly got things together.

"My birth name is Shidou Irina, however it was of course changed due to my marriage." Irina said with a wide smile, as she hugged the sputtering seated Issei from behind.

"Eh, marriage?" A surprised Katase said, who along with the other girls in class were blushing at the new.

A pit of dread opened in the bottom of Rias's stomach. After all, Koneko had told her that Issei has a dragon smell about him, so he was most likely to have the common Sacred Gear, Twice Critical. He was someone she wanted for her Peerage, but what that Exorcist is insinuating is...

"There something I'd like to announce for the sake of clarification so there isn't any misunderstandings or confusion." Irina took the uncharacteristically bashful Issei's hand showing...

...No. There's just no way.

There was a ring on Issei's left ring finger.

"This is Hyoudou Issei. Some of you may know him as the Oppai Pervert. You don't need to worry about that anymore. He is my husband. We are married and he is mine." Irina said calmly as Issei's face progressive went redder and redder.

Issei's friends shouted in shock, while the other guys were stunned in silence, and the girls look scandalized.

Irina then took out a water bottle.

"The Lord bless you and keep you; the Lord make his face to shine upon you and be gracious to you; the Lord lift up his countenance upon you and give you peace."

Rias had to hold back a flinch from the headache at hearing the sudden bible verse.

The water in the bottle shined for a moment, which most took for just reflection of sunlight, but the Devil knew to be a bless that turned the simple water, to Holy Water.

Then Irina opened the bottle, while keeping a hand on Issei's shoulder to keep him in place.

And poured the water over him.

"Bhwat! Irina!" Issei cried out as he was soaked.

"Sorry, darling~. Had to be done." Irina said playfully. Then she took the last bit of water in the bottle and drank it.

"What do you mean, 'it had to be'-!" Issei stood up started to shout, only for Irina to grap his head, and pull him in for a deep kiss, to his shock, and the shock of every student in class.

All while staring at Rias dead on.

This. Fucking. Bitch!