Isekaied by an inept Fanfiction Writer into Harry Potter
A story by DaManWriter, the inept Fanfiction Writer.
Disclaimer: If I did own Harry Potter or any other franchise that might get mentioned in this work, I'd relax on a tropical island right now instead of writing a disclaimer. I just borrow the characters for a bit and return them unharmed. Maybe.
Chapter 3
The Goblin teller looked at Harry with barely hidden disgust. Working directly with wizards was one of the lowest jobs Gringotts had to offer and nobody wanted to do this for long. Hell, most Goblins didn't want to do this for short, either. Some preferred shoveling dragon dung over talking with arrogant wizards or vain witches.
"What do you want, wizard?"
"I want to meet the manager of my vaults."
"Name?"
"Harry Potter."
The goblin groaned. Another one of those impostors? Is there no end to these idiots? Well, this will be fun at least. He looked at the boy before him.
"Follow me."
After placing a closed sign on the desk and showing his many sharp teeth in amusement at the grumbling in the queue he walked off with Harry.
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Sturgis Podmore, the next watcher from the Order apparated to Privet Drive. He found the house gone, firefighters starting to pack and Dumbledore still unconscious on the curb in front of where the house once was. His beard was burned off, the lower half of his face an interesting shade of red.
The shocked Order member quickly examined Dumbledore with a medical spell. The headmaster had markings of people walking all over his battered body, one arm, a leg as well as several ribs were broken. Podmore checked if there was need to obliviate anybody, but found Dumbledore's disillusionment geared towards muggles intact. Thanking Merlin he apparated with the headmaster to Hogwarts and called for help.
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After walking through a maze of corridors there finally was a door in front of them. Well, there was a shitload of fucking doors before this one, but they ignored those so they didn't count. There was a sign at the door, but Harry couldn't read the goblin gibberish so ignored that like the absurd number of doors before.
"Wait here."
The goblin entered the room. Two minutes later another goblin entered carrying a box. Harry hated waiting about as much as a goblin did. What the fuck are those ugly albino gnomes doing? I need a base of operations and I need it fucking now! Just when he had decided to give the door a good hard kick two more goblins walked up behind Harry, armed and armored this time instead of the pinstripe suites the others were wearing. Guards? The fuck? The door opened in front of him.
"Go into the room now."
"Fucking finally!"
Harry entered the room. Behind a large desk sat a goblin, another one sat in front of it. On the desk sat some papers, the open box, a bowl and an ornate dagger.
"Sit."
The boy-who-lived sat down in the free seat in front of the desk, while the two grinning guards stood at both sides of the door.
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Dumbledore was lying on a bed in the Hospital Wing at Hogwarts, Madam Pomfrey hovering over him.
"Was he trampled by a herd of Centaurs? He sure looks like it."
Podmore shook his head.
"No. It was a herd of muggles."
Poppy fed Dumbledore a selection of potions.
"Muggles?"
"Muggles."
"The headmaster was defeated by Muggles?"
Podmore nodded.
"And his beard set on fire."
The Healer checked the strangely red lower half of the headmasters face again.
"Well... about that... his skin is cauterized. His beard may not ever grow back."
"He won't be happy about that."
"Sure won't."
"He loved his beard."
"Sure did."
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"Harry Potter?"
"Yes?"
The goblin behind the desk pointed at the dagger.
"Use this to cut your palm and drop some blood into the bowl. We need to make sure you are who you say you are."
He grinned looking forward to punish another foolish wizard who thought he could steal from Gringotts. Nobody stole from Gringotts and got away with it. His head would look good on a pike in front of the bank.
Harry grinned right back, happy that finally shit started moving without having to kill something. Nah, how could he be happy about not killing something? That was absurd! Fucking up Being Z's plans was his only source of fun right now. Harry looked at the dagger, shrugged and gripped the blade with his other had. He hissed. Damn, that thing is insanely sharp!
Blood dripped into the bowl when suddenly his hand was healed. Oh. A magic blade? Cool. I want one.
The goblin took an ornate quill, dipped it into the bowl and placed in on a piece of parchment where it began to write.
Harold James Potter was the first line written. The goblins grimaced. There would be no fun today.
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The quill continued to write, Harry's parents were next, then the grand parents.
"That is enough. We'd need a waiver to do more."
The goblin sitting besides Harry stood, took the quill and vanished the content of the bowl. He placed both in the box, closed it and left the room taking it with him. The one sitting behind the desk waved at the two guards who left as well, grumbling over the lack of entertainment.
"Mister Potter, I am Griphook, the manager of the Potter vaults. What can I do for you?"
Harry looked at the goblin.
"Manager Griphook, like I wrote I need to know what I own, what vaults there are, what is in it, what I can take from them. Also what other belongings do the Potters have, houses, land, companies, whatever. I also want to pick up my Heir Rings. Oh, and I want to know why I never got any correspondence from Gringotts. No statements, nothing."
Money to buy whatever, a base of operations and stirring up more shit. Harry knew very well why he didn't get any messages, but the goblins didn't, yet. Albus fucking Dumbledore is going to get on their bad side? Oh, the poor baby!
The goblin grimaced. This will take some time. Damn wizard!
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Harry was in a waiting room while the goblin went to get all sorts of documents. Hurry up, you little shits! At least they left him tea and biscuits. He took a sip when he suddenly thought of something and called Dobby. The elf appeared without a pop since he has already been there all the time.
"Dobby, I want you to go to the Weasleys. You know where they live?"
The elf nodded, his large ears flopping.
"Dobby knows where weasels live. What should Dobby do for the Great Master Harry Potter sir?"
Harry grinned.
"They have a rat as a pet. I want you to get a small cage, stun the rat, place it under stasis and put it in the cage. Be very careful, that rat is dangerous and make sure nobody sees you."
"Dobby will do as Great Master Harry Potter sir says."
After a salute - where did he learn that? - the elf left. Again without a pop, since he just walked out the door, which was quite unusual behavior even for a normal elf.
Well, Gringotts had extensive wards against elves popping around and stealing things. Goblins hated nothing more then having stuff stolen from them. Well, maybe they hated wizards and witches more. Especially those who tried to steal from them. Anyway, Dobby was a smart elf so he walked away.
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"So I have two trust vaults and a present vault I can access as well as three Potter vaults and five Black vaults I can't access."
The goblin explaining the financial situation nodded.
"Exactly. There were various donations from many people who wanted to thank you for the defeat of Voldemort in the present vault, ranging from stuffed toys over money to books and artifacts. It's worth almost as much as you have in your trust vault which gets filled up monthly from the main Potter vault. The second trust vault is from your godfather Sirius Black, it holds a bit more than both your other vaults combined and gets a fixed amount from Sirius Black's personal vault once a year on your birthday."
"Seems money won't be a problem. Do I need anything to access the vaults?"
"Every vault owner gets a key. Do you have it?"
"No, someone else has it and the bloody bastard never gave it to me. Can I get a new one?"
The goblin grinned.
"Sure. That will be 15 galleons including voiding the old key."
"10 galleons."
"13."
"12."
"Deal."
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Harry looked at the list or properties the Potters owned.
"I see. How are the wards?"
"They should be fine. Gringotts has a service plan for that if you are interested. We have the best wards money can buy."
Harry looked at the goblin showing his pointy teeth.
"Of course it will be a lot of money, right?"
Griphook did a quite good imitation of a shark tasting blood.
"I want a new fidelius on Potter Manor with me as secret keeper and your best service plan. I also want the damage repaired."
"We have to send an assessment group before we can talk about repair cost. The wards will be..."
The haggling began again.
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A younger looking goblin entered the door and stood back respectfully while Harry pocketed the list of recommended solicitors.
"Now that everything else is taken care of you have to follow this goblin. He will take you to Warding & Charming where a curse breaker will get rid of the mail redirect you have. I would recommend installing a new mail redirect, though. Gringotts has a service plan of checking all mail for harmful curses, magical bombs and other nasty things. Since you are a quite prominent wizard with powerful enemies you should not neglect security measures. It also will prevent tampering with your mail in general."
Harry looked pleased with that.
"I will do that. Thank you, Manager Griphook. May your gold flow as well as the blood of your enemies."
Griphook was stunned for a moment. Wizards learning goblin traditions was just about unheard of. He gave a short respectful nod.
"Good luck with your endeavors, Heir Potter."
Harry followed the young goblin, who was now rather wide eyed, out of the door and once more through endless corridors. Damn, those goblins were shifty little bastards. He could respect that.