Trydan Briod (17) D5M
Six years ago...
It wasn't every day that Dad got to open up the nacelle. Sure, it wasn't entirely rare, but plenty of times we were focused on blades, or on the base, or on the wires outside of a turbine. All of those things were interesting enough, but I never cared about them quite so much as I cared about the nacelle. The base and the connective wiring were down on the ground, for one thing. I didn't much care for the days when we were stuck on the ground. I could be on the ground at home as easily as I could at work. Nacelle days, we were in the sky.
Dad could have told me exactly how far off the ground we were just by looking down. He had a long time practicing, though, and I didn't. I would have guessed we were about two hundred feet up. A sign told me we were three hundred. Not a terrible guess, but definitely not a good one. I didn't really care. The ground was far, far beneath me. The air was crisp and clean, and it was quiet. It was almost idyllic, being so far away from just about everyone. I could hear Dad working behind me, but he wasn't an issue. It was less noisy than the normal hustle and bustle of Five, and I would take what I could get.
For a while, I tried to just focus on the beauty of where I was. It was what Dad always wanted me to do. Sure, I got to come to work with him, but I had to promise to be good and serious and respect the delicacy of the work. I wanted to be respectful, because Dad said it was so serious and so important. But that wasn't nearly as interesting as the actual nacelle. It was wide open, for goodness' sake. I could see every little part of it, every gear and bolt I had read about and researched. Dad said I could probably take a nacelle apart and put it back together in my sleep at this point. It was what I was going to do when I grew up, after all. Being a technician was in my blood. And this nacelle needed to be taken apart. One gear was running slightly off, a few teeth not quite the right length. Dad hadn't noticed it yet. It seemed like something I could fix.
Dad said the gears moved at 1800 rpm. I knew that was fast. In that moment, I had no idea exactly how fast. I figured I could just stop the gear real quick. I stuck my left hand into the gearbox to try and stop the gear long enough to replace it and
the world exploded and
there was bright red
there was nothing but pain
there was noisenoisenoisenoisenoise and it was comingfromme
I didn't even think. I couldn't think, not with all the pain and all my screaming and how my lungs were aching and my throat was raw. My right hand darted in to pull my left hand out and everything was a hundred times worse and then it stopped.
When I woke up, my dad was crying. I was still in so much pain I had to think to breathe, but at least I was alive. Dad didn't let me look at my bandages for days. He changed them dutifully, making sure I never really got to examine my hands. I wondered why my fingers didn't hurt until I realized they weren't there at all.
Birdie Seguaro (14) D5F
Sunnaria and I held hands during the Reaping. It was something we'd always done, ever since we went to our first one together two years ago. It seemed like entire lifetimes ago that we were twelve, but it was actually such a short time. Twelve-year-old me knew so little. I had just barely started spreading the word about veganism. I'd been vegan nearly my entire life, but only twelve-year-old me had the courage to actually do anything about it. Sunnaria had helped with that. She was always so lively, so excited. She had so much zest for life and so little fear. Sunnaria convinced you you could do anything. She was lovely.
I could focus on what she was saying almost all of the time. I cared so much about everything that came out of her lips. "So I think that if we hurry up and start actually gathering funds we can focus more on research towards meat alternatives. I don't want to eat meat at all, but not everyone can afford that. Maybe some people will be able to manage if we get them plant-based meat alternatives instead of asking them to give up all forms of meat." All of that I could follow just fine. It made sense. It fit into my world. It was what I was supposed to think about and care about. "At least, that's what Cyrus thinks will help."
That's where I zone out. I don't like Sunnaria's boyfriend. He thinks he's sooo cool and sooo smart and sooo funny. Sunnaria says he's a cool dude but I don't believe her. Then again, I wouldn't think he was cool if he was made of gold. Or soy-based meat alternatives. He was dating Sunnaria and, well, I wasn't. He would never know that he had stolen the love of my life from me. It's not like I ever told him. It's not like I ever told anyone. Sunnaria didn't seem to really be into girls, which I couldn't understand at all, but I wasn't going to judge. I just wished she loved me like I loved her.
When Sunnaria started talking about Cyrus, I started staring at her lips. They were gorgeous. I'd never kissed anyone, but I wished she would be my first. I didn't even really know what kissing was supposed to feel like, but looking at her, I thought it would feel like berries popping in my mouth and cold water on a hot day. I thought it would be mint in ice water and a cup of cocoa in the middle of winter. I was so focused on her lips, I noticed the instant they stopped moving. It was what snapped me back to reality just long enough to process our escort reaching into the bowl of names, though I wasn't really focused anymore. I just wanted to live thinking about the way Sunnaria's hair glowed in the sun and her eyes glimmered in the starlight.
"Sunnaria Reyes!" Philomena Puff called out, and my world exploded. It shattered as the love of my life was pulled away from me. I knew I could never win Sunnaria's love. I knew she would never want from me what I wanted from her. It didn't matter. I could do the right thing for the girl I loved.
"I volunteer as tribute!"
It was the stupidest thing I'd ever done. I regretted the words the second they were out of my mouth. Too bad a volunteer can't rescind their words.
HI all. Gonna be honest my life is a whirlwind and I have a full-time job now and. Everything is chaotic. But I'm determined not to drop this story, so I'm still updating when I'm able to! I just can't promise how often or regularly that will be.