Hello everyone, here is another one shot, this one from Suicidal, where Sabo has a small relapse.
There is no warning for suicide or such as there is nothing like that in this. Not all relapses are as serious as that, thankfully. Sometimes it's just a small one, but still big, like this
Hope you enjoy
Read and relax
Trafalgar gave a look to Sabo, half worried. "Sabo, I think for your own good, a short term stay in a mental health unit can be good for you." Sabo blinked. What? "W-what? I- I don't want to be admitted again! I don't feel like that now! I-I-I-" Sabo didn't get more out as Trafalgar held a hand up. "No no, breathe, and let me explain." Sabo tried to take a breath, giving a nod, scared to be admitted all over again. "It is not like last time. This is a mental health unit, not psychiatric hospital or ward." Sabo blinked. There was a difference? "Isn't it- I mean, isn't it the same?" Trafalgar shook his head. "No. A mental health unit is a short-term unit for people who need a break to get stabilized, either because of medication change, or to get symptoms under control. This is entirely voluntary." Sabo blinked. "V-voluntary?" Trafalgar nodded. "Yes. This is just a suggestion. If you say yes now, and then change your mind later today, tomorrow, or in 3 days, you can leave. I am just suggesting a stay for around 7 days; a week. If you want to go home before, you can. If you get to day 7 and don't feel like going home yet, you can stay for a bit more. This is all up to you, and only you. What I am hearing, is that you're stuck in your routines, and the best way to change them when it sounds like this, a short-term stay is the best. This place is located just some miles away from your home, in the woods with country like atmosphere. I am also in there every now and then, but it is just, at max, 10 people there, and more workers to help stabilize your symptoms and day. If you want to stay in your room, that's fine. If you want to eat out with everyone, that's fine. If you want to take a trip out, you can. Nothing here is forced or done against your will. All I am asking, is for you to try. You can go home if you don't want to stay there, or just stay a day."
Sabo swallowed. "I- I can leave when I want to?" Trafalgar nodded. "Yes. You can discharge yourself whenever you want to. What do you think about this?" Sabo didn't know what to do. At first, he wanted to say no, but after a couple seconds, it sounded… good. Maybe he did need a break from his day. "I- I don't know. I mean- yes, it sounds good. But… I don't want to be stuck…" Trafalgar nodded. "I get that. But this is in no way close to the first time you were admitted. You couldn't leave then. You can keep your phone, you have a tv, and you can leave whenever you want. If you want to speak to everyone as usual, you can, but many uses this to relax and take a step away from their family and friends and not make them worry, or yourself feel guilty about it. Just relax." Sabo nodded. It sounded… good. "Y-maybe. I mean, I think I want it…" Trafalgar nodded. "Then let's try, okay? I will stay for the first bit, until I am sure you're in good care, and you can change your mind whenever you want to." Sabo nodded. It sounds good. But still… "But- Pops? And the rest?" Trafalgar nodded. "If you want, I can call them and explain. Or you can. But you need to tell someone." Sabo nodded. "Can… can you?" Trafalgar nodded. "Want me to do it now, or wait until we have spoken to the mental health unit and you are more sure?" Sabo blinked. That sounded better. "A-after? I don't want to worry them…" Trafalgar gave a comforting smile. "I am sure they will understand. They care about you and want your best. This is simply a suggestion I think would be good for you." Sabo nodded. It did sound good, and maybe he did need a small break. Trafalgar gave a supporting smile to him. "Shall we leave? It's just a short half hour drive." Sabo nodded as he stood up, and then headed after Trafalgar and to his car. Sabo tried to take deep breaths the entire way. He could do this.
When they reached the place, Sabo was busy staring out on the open fields, and especially on some type of bull that looked extraordinary as it had long horns and fur. When the car stopped, Sabo didn't know what to feel. The place looked calm and relaxing. Not close to the ward he had been at. He could see some people sitting around a table through a window, seeming to be only patients as no one had on the white coats or outfits nurses and doctors had. Sabo did find that a bit weird, but would see when he got inside. He felt mixed about this. There was also a couple just on the outside to the left of the building, seeming to be on their way to start a walk. Could they just walk out? Just like that? It felt too good to be true. For now, Sabo needed to try and relax.
When they got into the place, it was quiet and calm, a couple speaking low in the living room looking area. It seemed nice at first glance. He followed Trafalgar to a room where they spoke first, filling out some forms, before Trafalgar got a nurse, a nurse Tifa, that would follow him to his room. Trafalgar said Tifa would go with him Sabo, but not him, telling he wouldn't be here for too long, but he was taken well cared of by Tifa. Sabo wanted to believe that himself. When he got to his room, he was glad to see it being a medium sized room, having the standard things. Tifa did speak a bit to him, before showing him around. They did run into Trafalgar again, and he had a clam look, which helped calm Sabo down a bit. This was all so new. But still, it felt like it could be good for hm.
-x-
Whitebeard had a frown as he looked at the caller id, seeing it was from the hospital, from the psychiatric unit based on the number. He knew Sabo had an appointment today, and he hoped everything was going fine for his son. He dragged the green button over the screen to answer the call, trying to think of a reason for the hospital, most likely Trafalgar, called him. "Edwards Newgate," He answered, as usual, trying to not sound worried. It was just a second later he heard Trafalgar speaking. "Yes hi, Mr. Newgate, it's Dr Trafalgar calling, I hope I'm not interrupting anything." Whitebeard shook his head, even though he knew he was speaking on the phone. "No, it's no worries. Are everything fine?" He heard the doctor hum. "Nothing is wrong, but not completely fine either. Young Sabo has just been admitted to a short-term stay, 7 days, at the westside bulwark unit. It is a voluntary unit, and this is just to stabilize Sabo, as I feel he could need to get away from the daily routines; he sounds stuck in them and his thoughts. First things first; any questions?"
Whitebeard had hundreds of questions but needed to find the logical and good ones. "Is there anything I can do to help with this? Or if I should take a step back." Trafalgar hummed. "The only thing I can say you can do, is that Sabo needs some clothes- we didn't get to pack any as we just left for the unit. I suggest you know where this is, and if you want, I can meet you here and answer questions better." That did sound good, and he voiced that, agreeing to be there within half an hour to 45 minutes, which would go fine. It was just a 10 minute drive, but it would take some time to pack. He gave a weak excuse to Marco that he had to leave and would explain later, before he went to Sabo's room, packing most of his regular clothes, some of the electronics- so he had something to do- and a couple small things, like his favorite plushie. If Sabo needed anything more, he would gladly take extra trips to give it to Sabo. All he wanted, was for his son to be fine.
When he had everything ready and started the drive to westside bulwark unit, he had been right when it would take him up to 45 minutes, as he pulled up to the place after about 40 minutes and walking inside. He told the woman in the counter that he was here to meet Trafalgar, and was told to go to a room number and wait there, which he did, carrying the bag with things for Sabo. While Whitebeard had never been here before, he knew about the place and what good reputation it had for being a calm place. For Sabo to get admitted here, was the best place, better than a few others not that far away either. This was the calmest place, being entirely voluntary, not places where they used force. Whitebeard also decided he would tell Marco and Curiel about this first, before the rest. He knew Ace would be worried, but maybe he could come visit once here. Sabo might only be admitted here for around a week, but visits would probably mean a lot to the young blond. Sabo might be 19 years old, but he would always be Whitebeard's son, one of his newest additions, but still a part of his family.
Whitebeard sat in the room for about 10 minutes before the door opened and Trafalgar came inside. "Sorry for the wait, there was another patient I knew here and he wanted a chat." Whitebeard shook his head. "No worries. How's Sabo doing?" The doctor moved to sit down on a chair on the other side of the small table in the room. "Good when I last saw him, about 25 minutes ago as he went with the nurse that will be with him today, and probably most days. He seems a bit overwhelmed, but it is common to be that the first day." That was good to know, and he was sure Sabo would be well taken cared of here. "Why did he get admitted, if you can tell." Whitebeard knew about the patient confidentiality, especially as Sabo was an adult. Trafalgar gave a sigh, moving to look through some papers. "He mentions being a lot alone during the day, especially now that Ace is back on the dancing team, and just going through the same thoughts, bad ones, for day after day, not able to do things he used to, like drawing, painting, or writing. I would suggest to see if there are any activities he could join, those here can help check that too, so he has something during the day. It is nothing you've done wrong, or any of the others in the family, this can happen." That was good to know, that it wasn't any of their faults, but he still felt bad he hadn't noticed.
Trafalgar then motioned to the bag he had next to himself. "Is that the bag with the clothes?" Whitebeard nodded, moving to hand it over, when the man held his hand up. "Why don't I go and get Tifa- the nurse who's with Sabo- and she can follow you to him and ask if he maybe want a small visit?" Whitebeard nodded, liking that idea, and it also opened for a question. "Would it be fine to visit later too? I am sure Ace would enjoy to say hi to Sabo." Trafalgar chuckled. "Of course he can. You, or they, can't just sit out in the living room, since there is other patients here, so you need to be in Sabo's room. But anyone can visit, hopefully no more than 4 at a time; small rooms." That made sense and he nodded, and Trafalgar moved to head out of the room, quickly coming back with a nurse in tow, who held her hand out to him. "Hi, I'm Tifa. You would like to visit Sabo I heard?" Whitebeard nodded as he lifted the bag a little. "Yes. I have some things for him too." Tifa smiled at him. "He will appreciate it. Follow me, and I'll hear with him if he wants a small visit or not. Not everyone wants as it's overwhelming at the start, so don't take it bad if it happens." Whitebeard nodded. He knew that and would understand it if Sabo didn't want to see him. Whitebeard could, and would, come back later.
It was a big place, shaped like a square with a square out area in the middle for the smokers and those who wanted some fresh air without actually going out of the building. It was a nice place.
-x-
Sabo didn't know what to do right now. He felt overwhelmed and lost. He was at a new place, and he still wasn't sure how things would be. He still had his phone but wasn't sure if that was a fluke or not. It probably was. The nurse had left some minutes ago, telling she would let him calm down a bit in peace, and she would return soon. It was probably to check in with the upper ones that she could take what she needed to. This was all so much, so overwhelming and new, and scary.
When there was a knock at the door, Sabo sat silent for a couple seconds, before the person knocked again. Did he need to say 'come in'? That sounded weird, but maybe he should just try, maybe the person was trying to be courteous. "C-come in…?" Sabo managed to get out, and as he had, the door opened and the nurse came back into the room, closing the door behind her. "How is it going? I hope you feel better." Sabo nodded slowly, not sure what to expect. The nurse, Tifa if he remembered, moved a hand to motion to the door. "There is someone here, Whitebeard, wondering if you want a visit. He has some clothes and such with him too, but if you don't want to, I can give you the bag and Whitebeard can come back later." Sabo blinked, taking those words in. Did she say…? "I- I yes, I w-would. I can… I can have visits?" Tifa quickly nodded, having a calm and supporting look. "Of course. You can have as many as you want over. Although I would advise to not have more than 4 at once, the rooms here a small. You can ask friends and family if they want to visit, I am sure Whitebeard brought your phone charger." That had Sabo dumbfounded, using some seconds to respond. "W-wha- I can have my phone?" Tifa frowned a bit, seeming confused. "Of course you can, Sabo. What do you believe this place is like?" Sabo didn't know what to say, but before he could, Tifa shook her head. "We can take that later. I am sure Whitebeard would like to come in now. You want me to stay, or to come back later?" Sabo swallowed, trying to think how this would be like. "A-alone, if possible." Tifa nodded. "That's fine. I'll be back in half an hour. A short visit is best the first day; this is all overwhelming." Sabo nodded, and the nurse walked to the door and opened it, saying something and Sabo felt himself smile when he saw Whitebeard come through the door and into the room, Tifa closing the door behind him.
"Hi, Sabo." Started Whitebeard, and as Sabo realised Whitebeard was really here, and Sabo was really here, admitted to a psych ward again, he couldn't help it when his emotions decided to take over and he started crying. Whitebeard didn't seem to react much; which Sabo was glad for. The man just got a kind look, moving to sit down in the chair close to his. "I can only imagine you're overwhelmed, Sabo. I hope this helps; I brought some things from home." Sabo nodded. He wasn't outright bawling, just some tears that fell from his eyes. He moved a hand to dry them, before moving to open the bag, having a feeling the man had put something special in. When Sabo had opened the zipper, he couldn't help but smile as he took his plushie out, glad Whitebeard had brought that. "You brought Momoo." Whitebeard nodded as he had a smile, Sabo bringing a hand up to dry a couple tears again as the man spoke. "I did. Having something familiar could help, I thought at least."
Sabo nodded, looking at the plush. "Thank you. I really like it. Probably childish, but I like it." Pops gave a chuckle. "No no, child. It's not childish. You have your favorite things. A plush is by no means childish." Sabo just gave a nod, glad the man thought so. It wasn't silent for long as Whitebeard spoke again. "How are you feeling this far? I know it's barely been two hours, but you still have an opinion I guess." Sabo started a nod, before he sighed. "I don't know… It's so much. I don't know the rules here, or anyone… I don't know if I want to be here." Pops moved a hand to his leg, giving a supporting smile. "And that's fine. You're unsure. But I trust Dr Trafalgar. If he thinks you might need a stay here for a bit, then I think you should try. If you want to, you can leave with me now." Sabo was still torn between what he wanted, but this still sounded good. "I- I-" a sigh, "I think I want to try." Pops nodded. "That's good. And if you change your mind, call, okay?" Sabo nodded, and Whitebeard gave a smile to him, before moving to stand up. "But I think I need to leave. I can come back tomorrow, maybe even bring Ace if you want." Sabo nodded. Maybe he should do that. "Yeah, maybe. I would like that. I don't want him to worry too much." Pops chuckled at him. "And that's fine, but don't worry yourself. See you tomorrow, son." Sabo nodded and said goodbye, before the man walked out the door, leaving Sabo alone.
As Sabo was alone, he looked down at his plushie, trying to think where to place him. It was a plush of a sea cow from a little bit weird series, but Sabo really liked it, naming it Momoo. As Sabo looked around, he think he found a perfect place and moved to place the plush on the bed, making so it sat and looked at the door. "You'll help keep a watch, right?" There wasn't an answer- of course- but Sabo still believed Momoo would help out with this all. For now, Sabo needed to try and relax and get more info.
-x-
Sabo had been here for 3 days now, and he had been in his room all the time, save for meals. A couple he had taken in his room as he felt overwhelmed by so many people. Sabo still wondered how he was so okay with the huge family, but the people here got too much. Maybe it was because he didn't know them. It still felt weird. Sabo was normally a social person, but now he couldn't bear the thought. Maybe he really needed a stay here. Sabo still had his phone, being told he could keep it, and do whatever he wanted, just not take pictures or film of the employees or patients, which Sabo didn't even think of doing. He was also glad to see Pops had brought his small pc too, so he had something to watch series on, and write a couple times, wanting to try and get back into it. He had a small fanbase that liked his stories, and he needed to update something soon; he didn't want to disappoint everyone who followed him. It was a nice hobby and he usually enjoyed it but hadn't for a small bit for some reason. Or maybe a bit of a long while. Sabo felt he needed to find back to his passion somehow.
But for now, he would try and get more comfortable here. It was soon breakfast, and Sabo liked to try and get out a bit early, so he was sure he got a spot to sit. He always had, even when he had been late, but he liked it better by getting out early. The tables were usually full as there seemed to be many here. But half was nurses that worked here. And everyone had been kind, not that Sabo had spoken to many. He had mostly just spoken with the nurses and taken some small trips out to the woods, just walking around as he wanted some fresh air. Everyone was really nice, and Sabo really had a lot of freedom. He had as much as he had at home, just that here a nurse was not far away, and if you weren't seen for an hour or two, a head would pop into your room and ask how you were. Sabo had thought he wouldn't like that but had found he enjoyed it for some reason. Probably as it gave someone to speak to about anything and everything. It felt good to have that. At times he got advices, some other times, the nurses just sat and listened as Sabo spoke about everything and nothing. It felt nice.
Sabo didn't look much up as he ate, wanting to try and be as small as he could, hoping to get back to his room soon. But, when he was done eating and he looked at the watch, he sighed mentally as it was almost 9. So, Sabo moved to sit down on the couch in the living room. It was just 10 minutes until someone went to the medication room, so going back to his room and then out again sounded just harder than necessary. He should maybe try and be more out, it was getting boring inside his room. As he had been sitting for a couple minutes, no one really close by, another person moved to sit down on the couch on the other side of the table, giving a friendly smile as he held his hand out. "Hi, I haven't gotten to say hello to you yet. I'm Luffy." Sabo moved to shake his hand, trying his best to smile confidently and not nervously. "I'm S-Sabo." 'Well, that failed', was what Sabo thought. Why did he have to stutter? The other person, Luffy, didn't seem to care as he smiled. "Sabo, nice name. I've just seen you during meals. You're not out much." Sabo shrugged. "It's just so many here…" It was, it was almost always full at the tables. Luffy snorted. "Nah. Most go to do their business after eating. Not many are out here, so you should be out here. But I get it's scary; I didn't leave my room for the first week when I was here, so kudos, you are out now, after just 3 days." That had Sabo smile. This Luffy seemed like a nice person.
"S-so there aren't a lot out?" Luffy shook his head. "Nah. Maybe just 3. But when the clock is 8pm, everyone is by the tv; you should join. We're a calm group this time; I've been here before and at times it's noisy." Before Sabo could react to that, Tifa was suddenly behind Luffy, his couch being out in the open, while Sabo's was back against a wall. Tifa moved a hand to Luffy's shoulder. "Now, the times it's noisy, is because of you, young man. You are so easy to make friends with, and so many laughs, and I love it." Luffy just gave a smile and a joyful comment. Luffy really did seem like a nice person, and maybe Sabo should try and be more out. Tifa then looked at him. "Now Sabo, I'm heading to the medicine room, you want to head on with me?" Sabo nodded and stood up, heading after Tifa, giving a small goodbye to Luffy, who smiled and gave a louder and jolly one. Yeah, Luffy did seem like a nice person.
-x-
The next few days went better than the ones before. Getting to know this other boy, Luffy, had helped a lot. He was so jolly and outgoing, and Sabo really liked to be around him. Luffy seemed so… well. So healthy and not sick. But he probably had his own things. He had noticed at times a nurse standing outside of his room and knocking and speaking with him through the door, so Luffy probably had his own issues. And even if it might make Sabo sound like a bad person, he was a bit glad to see that; it meant Sabo wasn't alone in being unsure and sick, or not sick sick, but mentally sick. Luffy had also asked him during meals to stay a bit out, and Sabo had a couple times, glad to see the other black haired kid was right, that there weren't many out in the living room, and it was a quiet place when most left to do their things.
Luffy had even taken Sabo to a couple of the group meetings, telling that he didn't need to say anything, just sit there, telling it might help. Not that Sabo got why or how that would help. But, as he had one time, after Luffy had asked 4 times, and again, Luffy had been right. It was good to hear the others having issues too. Sabo didn't care if it made him sound like a bad person, but it had him feel less alone. Ace had his own issues, but Sabo hadn't met anyone who has the same issues as him, but here there were other with the same issues. and just how you could leave if you wanted to, which a couple did in the midst of the group, made him realise how free this was. You could just leave, and no one would give you a reprimand for it. It was just like being home, which had him glad. It was just as Tifa and Trafalgar had said, that everything was voluntary.
And after 5 days, he noticed how much he actually needed this small stay. He felt much better, both alone and when he was around the others. He was also glad he had gotten a new friend. Luffy had one day asked for his phone, and when Sabo handed it to the other kid, Luffy had moved to take a selfie of himself, before putting himself into his contacts with his number, name, and picture. It meant a lot to Sabo. When Ace came and visited Sabo on the 6th day, Sabo really wanted to introduce Ace to Luffy, but knew he couldn't. Luffy was another patient, and it broke the rules with patient confidentiality. Sabo got it, and therefore hadn't. But he had spoken about Ace to Luffy, and Luffy had said when both of them would be out, Luffy could visit him, them. Luffy had said he was a managed at a toy store and had a lot of free time most days as he could work from where he was.
When he finally was realised, he gave a goodbye to Luffy, sure he would never see the other again. Sure that when he walked out the doors, Luffy would just forget and not care for him. What Sabo tried to focus on, was how much better he felt. How he felt he could take a battle at home, how he could manage to continue with his hobbies, especially his writing as he usually really enjoyed it, but hadn't for a long time. But not, things felt good again. He felt like he could have the energy and fantasy to write again.
But, as he had been out for some days, almost a week, he was shocked when Curiel once came and said there was a visitor for him at the door. Sabo didn't know many people, especially not anyone who wasn't in the family. When he got to the door, he was shocked, but ecstatic to see it was Luffy, who looked as happy as he always did. "Sabo! I said I would come! I want to meet this Ace now!" Sabo couldn't help but smile, and for once, he felt emotional and didn't cry, which was a thing he hadn't for a long time been able to.
Sabo was sure Luffy and Ace would be good friends too.
And that's the chapter, I hope you enjoyed
This felt perfect for me to do now, as I just got out of a psychiatric ward myself. Although I was in for almost 4 weeks, and not just one. I wanted to try and shed light on the voluntary side, on how calm it can be, and hoped this did that, even though it's a bit short. So for anyone who has some issues, big or small, a mental health stay in a psychiatric ward that is completely voluntary, is really calm and nice, it is like being home with nurses and doctors everywhere, as well as group therapy and such. It was something that helped me and I hope it can help others too, although I wasn't put in acute, but semi-acute, which is almost the same, but that I got a couple days to prepare and pack myself
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