Paying no attention to the passing of time, i wandered without purpose as my mind replayed the events. I felt too many different emotions to decide which was the most prominent, though the hurt was a strong contender. How are you supposed to react when the ones asking for your trust are keeping things from you?

I was grateful Rosalie had stood up for me, but Alice... i thought she cared and, maybe, could be the first real friend I'd made since arriving in Forks. She'd been there for me since the start and I'd began to confide in her. Now, i didn't know what to think. Surely telling me about my father wouldn't have resulted in a terrible situation? I could've watched from afar or listened into the conversation; i had enough strength for that.

You're a newborn and driven by your instincts.

I snarled as Edward's words rang in my head again. I wanted to deny everything he said and was eager to prove him wrong, but my supressed voice of sanity was quietly whispering to me that he did have a point. These mood swings were something else, much worse than anything I'd experienced before and difficult to control.

Would you risk your father like that?

My conscious continued talking to me, adopting the same tone of voice Edward had used earlier which only frustrated me further. I shook the voice away, refusing to admit he was right. There wasn't a risk if i was careful, as long as i kept enough distance so i didn't catch his scent. I was sure of it.

You wouldn't last two minutes in that room!

My jaw clenched in resistance to his words and my body pivoted in a new direction, instinctively following the pull of wanting to see my father. I only made it a couple of steps before i froze again, realizing i didn't know how to get there. The Cullens said we were still in Forks, but they'd done a good job at keeping the exact location in the dark. I was unsure of the route, but was confident my senses could get me there now i understood them better. But... what if i crossed paths with someone when i wasn't prepared? I didn't want to hurt anyone, especially from my own stubbornness.

Would you risk your father like that?

The repeated whisper was in my voice this time, the mental image it carried very difficult to bear. As much as i wanted to see my father, the sensible part of me knew it wasn't a smart thing to do. My eyes glanced down to my pale hands, my ruined clothing and i knew my appearance would frighten him more than anything else. Even when i reached the point of control, would my re-emergence in his life just bring him more agony? I swallowed hard as i felt those strange, tearless sobs building, not wanting to give into it. What good would it do to wallow?

Instead, i turned towards the direction of the Cullen's house but found my feet were perfectly in line with my thoughts; i didn't want to go back. The cloud of sadness i felt seemed to hang in that direction, amplified at the thought of returning to face Edward again. Our arguments were increasing in aggression, he'd led the conspiracy and fully flipped his attitude towards me, or maybe was now showing his true colors. How was i supposed to stay under the same roof as him after this? It was hard enough before!

My head turned towards the deeper part of the forest, considering my options. Maybe i could go at it alone, become a nomad. I could do things my way, make my own decisions and protect myself, not relying on others to let me down again. I'd agreed to stay for that first year, but i could try to hide away until i passed through the newborn stage, avoiding the risk for everyone. I already felt the building sense of loneliness that life would bring, but maybe it was for the best. Yet... why did i feel conflicted?

"Maybe i can help you decide."

My head whipped round and i growled as Alice appeared, sensibly keeping her distance. My body tensed and the urge to escape grew stronger, not wanting to deal with her right now, but she spoke before i could make a move.

"I know you don't want to talk to me-"

"You're right; i don't!"

"I just thought I'd-"

"I don't want your manipulation, Alice! I made that clear from day one!"

She went silent for a moment, her eyes showing sadness at my words. "That's not why I'm here."

"No? You're not going to say exactly the right thing in exactly the right way to get what you want? To block my own wants and options?"

Alice continued to keep her distance, nervous as she studied me. "Bella, that isn't what I've been doing. I'm not even watching the future right now, i just wanted to help you."

My hostility continued to control my tongue. "I think you've done plenty. We tried, we didn't even make it two weeks, what else is there left to discuss?"

"Would you please stop being so stubborn and at least listen to my offer?"

She wasn't arguing with me, nor trying to guilt me with sadness; she sounded sincere, which made me hesitate. I closed my eyes and exhaled to try to calm myself a bit more, knowing that lashing out wouldn't get us anywhere. After a few breaths, i opened my eyes again and met her concerned gaze. "I'm listening."

"I came here to ask you to come back."

My responding hiss was loud, my feet immediately backing away.

"Wait, just hear me out. We'd love nothing more than for you to become a part of the family, you already know that, but tonight we hurt you and need to build back your trust."

I was grateful she wasn't dancing around the subject, but i remained guarded. "How do i know you didn't prepare this big speech, examining what would work best, before coming to find me?"

Alice shook her head in response, not moving from her spot. "Because i didn't. I'll admit i looked ahead when you left because i wanted to make sure you were ok. I was worried when you considered looking for your father and i didn't want to lose you if you did run away, but i swear to you i didn't pre-empt any of this before deciding to follow. I wanted to offer you a fourth option instead."

She threw something small to me which i caught with ease. I lifted the item to study it and looked at her with questioning eyes. "A key? To the house?"

"A key to your house. Well, it's a cottage, but the principle is the same."

I looked back at the key in surprise, before confusion returned and i glanced back to Alice. "You're giving me a cottage?"

"If you want it. The cottage is still on our grounds, but a short distance from the main house. Esme had long planned to finish the restoration and when you came along, she saw it as the perfect opportunity to continue. We thought you may enjoy some independence as well, though you'll still be welcome at the house, of course."

I stared at her in stunned silence, not sure how to react. I was touched by the gesture, enjoying the idea of my own space but it was too much to accept, even after everything that had happened. Was she trying to win my trust back with extravagant gifts?

"It's not from guilt or to win you over, Bella, we just want you to be happy."

I raised a pointed eyebrow at her and she gave a sheepish smile back. "Sorry, force of habit, i won't do it again today."

I studied the key again as my mind recalled how often the Cullen men had left the house, particularly Edward disappearing so much each day. I felt myself resisting with that realization, not wanting any charity from him.

"Was Edward the one who-"

"We all contributed towards it."

I pursed my lips while her eyes shined with honesty. It was difficult not to believe her and i truly wanted to believe she wouldn't lie to me now.

"Would you like to see it?"

Alice, probably sensing my swaying, smiled as she waited for me to answer with a cautious nod. As she led the way she didn't try to get too close or chat, probably knowing it wouldn't do much good if she did. I followed behind her, not realizing how far away I'd ventured during the night. After a while, i caught the faded trails of the Cullens and grew curious with the new smells in this part of the forest; cut timber, some kind of aquatic floral smell and disturbed soil. I noticed a warm, artificial light in the distance and found my pace increasing, eager to see what the Cullens had created.

My eyes widened as i took in the sight of the cottage, beautifully nestled into its tranquil surroundings straight from the pages of a fairytale. Alice gave me the honor of opening the big, wooden door with extreme caution and a small breath escaped me as we entered. The living space was the perfect balance of cozy and spacious with an unlit fire ready to curl up by. Pictures around the room showed the cottage from its ruined state before the Cullens had worked their magic. She showed me to a bedroom holding a large bed and external glass doors into a little courtyard garden with a pond, the source of the aquatic smell. Returning to the hall, she indicated to a functioning bathroom and a smaller, second room they'd set up as a combined studio/study. All the furniture was of strong wood, old fashioned yet timeless; it fitted the cottage perfectly. There was so much to take in, yet i found myself returning to the living space, feeling at home for the first time since leaving Phoenix as my gaze flickered to the bookshelf.

"Carlisle brought across your favourites and recommendations he felt you'd enjoy."

I examined the titles as i listened to her explanation. "That was sweet of him, I'll have to thank him later."

"Does that mean you'll stay?"

I froze then slowly looked back to Alice, her hopeful eyes staring up at me. True to her word, she was with me rather than looking towards the future or trying to talk me around. Her earlier antics still stung and i didn't feel ready to lower my guard yet. I didn't tend to hold grudges, with the exception of Edward, but it wouldn't be easy for me to let everything go or pretend nothing happened.

Thinking again over the options available and what the sensible thing was to do, i briefly closed my eyes with a small sigh of defeat before turning my serious gaze back to her. "Fine, I'll stay, but i do have a condition for you."

Alice stopped her happy bouncing as she listened intently. "For me?"

"You never lie or keep information from me again, Alice."

I watched her consider my words, knowing i wouldn't tolerate being misled or lied to for any purpose. With a confirming nod, she carefully grasped my hand and her golden eyes met my ruby ones.

"I promise i'll always tell you the truth."

"Thank you." A small smile of gratitude appeared, prompting her to hug me tightly. After some hesitation, i carefully returned her hug though not as strongly. She didn't say anything, continuing a little longer before letting go with a delighted smile.

"Shall we head back to the main house? Everyone's really worried and want to make sure you're ok."

I remained still for the moment, my discomfort clear as well as the obvious question in my expression.

"Don't worry, he isn't there and won't be back for a while."

After another second, i nodded my confirmation which raised another beaming smile from her. Observing me for a moment, she quickly dashed into the bedroom and back, offering an oversized sweater to cover my ruined clothing. Throwing it on, i followed her out of the cottage and took one last glance back, eager to return to my new home as soon as possible.

.

The mess had long been cleared by the time Alice and i returned, though examining both broken windows did return a sense of guilt. The glass was by special order and they had to wait for it to be made before they could repair the study window. I'd cringed at the explanation and potential costs, knowing it would increase after mine and Edward's last fight, though anytime the subject of money came up they were always quick to silence me.

"Oh, Bella, thank goodness!"

My attention returned to the kitchen as Esme rushed out and immediately wrapped me in a motherly cuddle, joy radiating from her. There was no part of me that could dislike the Cullen's gentle matriarch, so returning it was instinctive.

"I was worried you wouldn't return, i'm so sorry for what happened." She sounded genuinely distressed, which i was quick to reassure.

"It's ok, Esme, it's not your fault." I pulled back and she looked to me with genuine affection in her eyes. "The cottage is amazing, by the way; you did an incredible job."

She beamed at the praise, proud of the appreciation. "A fun hobby, dear, and I'm delighted you like it as well."

She squeezed my arms before she let go and led the way towards the living space, Alice having gone ahead. I paused as i entered the room behind Esme, feeling my walls going back up; all of the Cullens, sans Edward, were collectively awaiting my presence. I glanced to them each warily, though when i found Rosalie a mouthed a sincere 'thank you' to her which she acknowledged with a nod. She still appeared angry, though Carlisle began speaking before i could consider it further.

"Bella, please allow me to apologize for the events of the evening. Our intent was never to cause you harm or distress; we wanted to protect both you and your father further from the trouble our family has already caused."

I nodded as he finished, showing i understood but wasn't sure how to respond. A part of me found it strange how Carlisle collectively accepted the blame for Edward's actions, but i didn't question it as he continued.

"As you know, we all aim to be the best versions of ourselves and blend in with the human world. Unfortunately, we failed you on first meeting and it hurts us all to have forced another into this way of life without a choice, but I'm not disappointed that it brought you into our family."

My eyes widened at his words, not expecting anything like this. I was surprised they saw me in this light, especially with the chaos I'd brought into their home.

"Yesterday, you weren't treated like a member of our family when, in our eyes, you have been since the moment we brought you here. Our decision was to shield you from the potential distress of your father visiting, rather than working on a solution together like we should have done. I promise you this will not happen again and you will be included in any conversations or concerns in the future, even if they may be difficult to hear."

I was grateful and felt relief knowing i would no longer be kept in the dark, though my guard remained in place. "Thank you, Carlisle, it means a lot to hear that and i appreciate the sentiment."

"We know everything is still new and difficult, however you've been doing well despite this." I couldn't help raising an eyebrow at that, which made him laugh before continuing. "Windows aside, of course, though they were perfectly justified."

I couldn't help but smile at him, the rest of the Cullens noticeably relaxing as the conversation went in a positive way. "I am still sorry for breaking them and everything else, i never mean to, i just..."

I don't finish the sentence, but everyone knows exactly what I'm referring to.

"As i said, perfectly understandable." He then noticed my glance upstairs and answered my unspoken question. "I have also spoken with him and he knows his actions have been wrong. He's given us space this evening to avoid upsetting you further and passed on his own apology; he didn't think you'd want to hear it from him."

I nodded in agreement, knowing his presence right now would be enough to set me off.

To my surprise, Jasper spoke up and leaned forward, likely able to sense my doubt at Carlisle's praise. "Bella, you should give yourself more credit. You're handling things better than an average newborn and finding an outlet helps, it's one of the reasons Emmett and i like to test our skills against each other."

"Or you could always put it into something more productive, like Alice's designing or Esme's architecture." Rosalie had rolled her eyes at Jasper's method before offering alternatives. "I'm sure you could find something that you enjoy."

My mind wandered back to my previous conversation with Alice before Edward had disrupted us. "Maybe, there's plenty of time to discover it, though it may be too soon to join in with your matches." Jasper nodded in understanding, though Emmett looked genuinely disappointed. "Oh, and thank you all for the use of the cottage, it's beautiful and i promise to take care of it."

Alice was shaking her head with a smile at my words. "I already told you, Bella, the cottage is yours. We just ask for you to still come by the main house to see us."

I immediately shook my head. "I can't possibly accept-"

"You can and you will!" The pushier side of Alice had returned, yet it only made me smile at her antics. "It's a gift from all of us."

The Cullens nodded in response and encouragement, my gaze awkwardly dropping to the floor and feeling grateful that my old blushing habit was no longer an issue. "Thank you all so much, i will treasure it."

"Back to this outlet we were talking about." Emmet spoke this time, a big grin on his face as my eyes rose to meet his. "Are you really saying fighting isn't your bag? You've done a great job against Eddy a few times now; you're a natural! You sure you don't want to test against one of us?"

I audibly gulped at the prospect, which made the others chuckle. Jasper had told me about his history and had the scars to back it up. Emmett... he was just so big. How could i possibly fight them? "I'm not sure that's wise..."

"Don't you remember what a newborn can do, Em?" Jasper smirked as he turned to me. "He's not as intimidating when you can out-match his strength."

"Please! Her? She's got nothing on me!" Emmett hit his knee, finding the whole situation humorous. "She barely comes up to my chest!"

"I think you should show your little sister some more respect." Rosalie winked at me. "I think she could kick your ass."

Emmett looked wounded at her declaration. "Hey, you're supposed to support your loving husband! I'm crushed you doubt me, beautiful."

"I'm just saying, i wouldn't underestimate Bella."

Emmett laughed again as he looked back to appraise me. "She couldn't even beat me in an arm wrestle let alone a fight."

I tried to resist the urge to prove him wrong, but it was becoming stronger. I decided it may be less humiliating to face him with an arm wrestle than a fight, so spoke up before it could escalate. "I'll take that bet."

Most of the Cullens looked at me in surprise, Alice and Jasper wearing matching grins while Emmett stood up, meeting my gaze with determination. "Oh, the little firecracker wants to make it interesting? You're on! If i win, you and i will have a proper fight so i can show you who the strongest one in the house really is!"

"Isn't that what you're doing now...?" I heard Jasper murmur, shaking his head as Emmett shushed him.

I'd already learned Emmett loved to throw out challenges and make bets, so this came as no surprise. Hiding my nerves, i raised my chin up stubbornly and nodded in agreement. "Fine, but if i win, the girls get to give you a makeover for a more 'productive' use of time."

The others laughed at the proposition while Emmett barely considered it before sticking out his hand. "Deal!"

I shook it, his large hand entirely covering mine before heading outside to find a space for us. As he set up, i hung back with Jasper and Alice for a moment.

"Can i seriously win against him?"

"Sorry, i promised i wouldn't look ahead again today, remember?" Alice teased and stuck out her tongue as she met my unimpressed expression.

"Trust us, Bella, you've got this." Jasper clapped me on the shoulder with a wink, a new sense of confidence radiating through me as i followed Emmett outside.

The sky was beginning to lighten as we took our positions, everyone gathering around to watch. I kept my head raised and eyes sharp, which made his grin wider.

"Ready in 3, 2, 1... go!"

I was prepared for my hand to be slammed into the stone beneath us, but blinked in surprise when nothing changed. I watched with fascination as my hand didn't move an inch, yet Emmett was clearly pushing against it with force. A smirk began to creep across my face, which only aggravated Emmett more as he practically shook with effort. Letting myself enjoy the moment, i decided to mimic how the Cullens handled him by teasing him at his own game.

"Alice, do we have any hot pink stilettos around?"

She giggled in reply before joining in. "Not in his size, but i can place a rush order with a matching outfit!"

Emmett's face changed to concern at my words and i used that moment to return his efforts, using more strength than intended as i slammed his hand down and destroyed the rock beneath us. A cheer went up and i stared in amazement at the proof i was stronger than the vampire-hulk in front of me. He cursed and stalked into the forest, my laughter ringing behind him as the others joined me.

When i pulled back from Alice's hug, a pale figure a distance away caught my attention. My head turned to see Edward examining the scene, a crooked smile and eyes soft as he watched my celebrations. In the blink of an eye, the expression seemed to disappear into a blank mask as, without a word, he hurried through the house and up the stairs.

I was glad he kept his distance and left us alone, but as i returned to the attention of the Cullens my mind wandered back to his first expression. I'd never seen him looking at me like that before and, yet, something about it felt familiar. I shook away the thought and focused on our plans for Emmett's makeover, though the lingering image of Edward's smile remained with me throughout.

A/N: Just a note to thank you for your support as always.

I wish you a Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!