Dumbledore leaves after finishing his tea, and Sirius and Remus stay behind in an uncomfortable silence that weighs down on their tired hearts.

"Padfoot…" Remus talks first.

There are so many things he wants to say, but the words are stuck in his throat and choking him. He can barely breathe with the weight of Sirius's defeated expression, with the ice that grows inside his ribs as the man refuses to look at him. He has no idea where to start.

"I will take my old bedroom," Sirius says, his grey eyes resolutely glued to the wooden table. "You can take the master bedroom or Regulus's - both are spacious and have a nice view of the garden, although I reckon Kreacher might want to keep my brother's untouched so you would have to fight the little nasty thing."

"Sirius, I'm so sorry," Remus whispers. He swallows convulsively against the knot in his throat and fights to keep the tears at bay.

"I understand," Sirius says, softly. "Nobody knew that Peter was the Secret Keeper… I didn't trust you enough either. I don't blame you at all."

Sirius means every word he says, but he can't help the emotionless tone in which the words leave his mouth. He longed to say these words to Remus for so many years, but the scene he had dreamt would be filled with hugs and smiles is now dampened and darkened by the realization that Remus has also failed their little Prongslet.

"I'm sorry about Harry…"

Sirius breathes in, sharply, and his eyes finally turn to Remus.

He is furious, he realizes, but his heart still shudders at the sight of the werewolf. The love he had for his man hasn't waned or withered. He wants nothing more than to grab his face and clean the tears clinging to the corners of his eyes.

"Why?" he asks, his voice hard, his teeth clenching.

"I didn't think anything good would come of it. If he is happy, why would I bulldoze into his life to ruin it?"

"But you don't know if he's happy. Do you even know where he is?"

Remus frowns, a flash of anger sparking below the terrible grief. Of course he knows.

"He was left in the care of Lily's sister."

"Petunia? The muggle who hated Lily for being a witch?" Sirius bites back, remembering Lily's sad eyes as she confided in them why she didn't particularly love going back home during the summer.

"They were children. The woman is an adult now, Sirius, with her own family." Remus says through clenched teeth. He might not know much about Harry, but he had made sure he was sent to a nice home. "I went there once, a few days after -" he stops that train of thought and swallows before continuing "… It's a nice, big home in a muggle neighborhood. Privet Drive, I think."

"Why didn't you keep visiting?" Sirius says, his voice a little louder, angry at the revelation that Remus has known where Harry is this entire time.

Remus's anger quells, drowned by the guilt.

"Who would want a werewolf near their child?"

"James and Lily," Sirius answers.

Remus closes his eyes as a tear rolls down, and when he opens them again, his entire face looks like an open wound.

He doesn't know what to say.

After a minute, Sirius gets up.

"I'm going to bed."

"Sirius…"

"Make yourself at home."

.

Despite what he promised Dumbledore, Sirius has absolutely no intention to obey. He has no intentions to obey anyone now that he is a free man. And not even the Dark Lord himself will keep him away from his little godson a second longer.

So, when he is fairly sure Remus is deeply asleep, he walks into his father's old study and takes out a magical map that had served as inspiration for their very own creation. It's a parchment that, with a simple spell, reveals any location known to the Magical World and how to get there from one's current location. When he finds the path to Privet Drive, he transforms and flees into the night, running towards his godson.

He is slightly surprised at the cold that bites at him even through his thick, matted fur. The snow crunches below his paws and it quickly covers his mane, and he is reminded with a slight twinge that it is the beginning of winter, and not too long from now he will experience his first Christmas in nine years. His heart leaps and then cringes. He spent every single Christmas with his friends and James's family since he was 16, up until they had to go into hiding.

He shakes the thought away from his head.

It takes him the whole night, and he has to make a few stops to drink some water and rest for a bit. He reaches the suburbs at the crack of dawn and walks aimlessly through the houses hoping to get a glimpse of something that might indicate where Harry lives. Turns out he doesn't have to wait long.

A little black-haired head can be seen through one of the windows, bent down looking over what looks like a stove.

Sirius crouches low behind a bush in the garden across the street, hiding his huge frame among the moist leaves and peering at the boy between the branches. The sight breaks his heart and confuses him at the same time.

The kid is identical to James. He even has the same wireframe glasses that his father used to wear, the same messy hairstyle… but he looks small and scrawny in a way James never did. He looks younger than he should be in terms of buildup, but his face somehow holds an expression much too serious for a ten-year-old.

He wants to transform back into his human form and go to the child to ask him if he is alright, but he knows he can't just barge in. He doesn't know what type of wards Dumbledore has installed but he knows they must be powerful. Besides, he tries to tell himself for reassurance, maybe he takes after Lily in that regard - she was shorter and skinnier than James.

The boy looks up for a second, and Sirius's excellent dog eyesight catches the green in them, his heart breaking even more.

Inside, Harry shuts off the stove and puts the fried eggs, bacon, and sausage on two separate plates before placing them on the kitchen table. Only his aunt and uncle will have breakfast this early. He will have to prepare something for Dudley once he wakes, closer to midday, since he sleeps in every day of his vacations.

His aunt walks in and looks at the food, then at her nephew putting toast on a plate. He is moving slowly and gingerly, his body trembling slightly.

"Eat something before your uncle walks down for breakfast," she tells him in a low voice and looks away before she can see the surprised gratitude on his face.

Harry is quick to snatch one of the pieces of toast and shove it in his mouth along with one full sausage and a piece of bacon. Then he gulps down some water right before thundering footsteps echo through the house.

The boy freezes in place, looking at the floor, as the man appears in the doorway and glares down at him. Fear wraps angry hands around his throat, and he has to fight hard to stifle a whimper. He wishes more than anything that the tile floor his eyes are glued to could open up and swallow him whole.

"Morning" Petunia says coldly with a strained smile on her face, forcing the man to break his glare and look at his wife.

"Morning," he grumbles as he sits down at the table.

Harry sighs in relief as his uncle's back is turned to him. The action sends fiery pain through his bruised ribs, but he makes no other sound as he rushes out of the kitchen to continue his chores.

Sirius is suspicious as he watches Harry quickly stuff food into his mouth before rushing out of the kitchen, but as far away as he is, he can't listen to what they say.

Through another window, he watches as Harry starts dusting the living room. Anger flashes for a second in his heart, but then he remembers how Effie and Fleamont would often punish James (and later him) with tedious chores around the house after particularly rebellious pranks… and so he smiles internally a little at the thought that maybe Harry is every bit the trouble magnet his father was.

He can't see Harry anymore as the kid moves to another part of the house, and he can hear movement inside the house adjacent to the garden he is in, so he quickly moves out of the branch and trots back to Grimauld.

Kreacher glares at him as he walks inside, mindless of the muddy, watery mess he is leaving in the doorway. The elf grumbles something about dirty mutts and Mistress Black hating messes around the house, but Sirius ignores him as he transforms back into himself and goes to take a much-needed shower.

He runs into Remus in the hallway as they both walk down for breakfast.

It's awkward, but Sirius is full of energy. Seeing Harry, even for a few minutes at a distance, and realizing how much he looked like James has renewed his spirits. And he has a plan, for which he wants Remus onboard. He could very well do it by himself, but pulling mischief with his Moony sounds amazing right now, despite the resentment he still feels under his buzzing excitement.

They sit at the kitchen table as Kreacher serves them breakfast.

"I did something last night." Sirius begins.

Remus feels the old dart of nervousness that was so familiar back in school, when Sirius told him all about a new prank or joke.

"Oh?"

"You're not going to like it."

Remus had been planning to talk to Sirius about everything, including their situation. The last time they saw each other, they were together, and he doesn't want to be walking on eggshells in what he is supposed to assume is his new house now. But this conversation seems much more urgent and worrying.

"When have I ever liked any of your mischievous endeavors?" he says, imitating a Professor like they used to do back in school.

Sirius grins, and Remus's heart flutters. Oh, how he missed that damn smile.

"I went to see Harry."

Remus's face falls, horror slowly creeping up his spine and twisting his expression.

"I beg your pardon?"

"He didn't see me," Sirius adds hastily. "I watched him from behind a bush. But… he looks like Prongs."

Remus's throat closes tightly, tears immediately forming in his eyes.

"Really?" he whispers.

"And he has Lily's eyes."

The stab right between his ribs is unbearable, and the twisted, rotten mess that has become of his chest is mauled once more. He closes his eyes for a moment, trying to regain some balance and logic. Then he looks at Sirius again.

"Is he alright?" he croaks, and the words barely leave his throat, but he finds a small gap to take a deep breath of relief when Sirius nods. "Oh, Merlin."

"Moony," Sirius says, "I don't give a rat's ass what Dumbledore wants or thinks is best for Harry. I want to keep seeing him."

"Padfoot…" Remus says, still recovering from the news.

"I have no idea which wards the man has placed around Harry - so I know we have to be careful but - "

"Sorry, we?"

As happy as Remus is that Sirius is not looking at him the same way he did last night, and he is not giving him the silent treatment or blowing up in his face, he is not sure he wants to be a part of this. It hasn't even been a day since Sirius tasted freedom and he already wants to go around causing trouble.

"Yes, of course," Sirius answers, frowning a little despite the smile still present on his face. "Look, Moons, I understand that these years have been difficult, and we need to talk about it at some point, but right now I know you are aching to see him as well. Aren't you?"

"I… I do want to see him, sure. Of course. But you said it yourself, Sirius. We have no idea what kind of wards Dumbledore has put around Harry and if he sees that we are going against his request, he could install additional ones that keep us away from him for good."

Sirius rolls his eyes, the anger and betrayal from last night making a comeback.

"Dumbledore might be manipulative and suspicious but he's not evil, Moony. He wouldn't keep us away from Harry for good. Don't be such a coward."

Remus swallows, wondering if Sirius believes those words even as he utters them with unwavering confidence. Of course, Dumbledore is not evil… but when he sets his mind on something, no wizard alive can contradict him. He knows the headmaster wouldn't willingly, actively hurt any of them, but what he doesn't know is if there is an ulterior motive to his recent actions. If the past is any indication, Dumbledore has hidden intentions for every single thing he does, and he isn't sure he buys the whole "Harry's best interest at heart" reasoning.

"If he is alright, why not wait a few days? At least until we see the Mind Healer."

"I'll do this with or without you." Sirius deadpans, glaring at him. "Where is your sense of adventure? Come on, Moony, we're not in school anymore. Dumbledore doesn't dictate what we do."

Remus takes a deep breath, and he has a sudden deja vu of school. The fear of saying no to the only people who would ever want to be friends with him is still present, and he wants nothing more than to make Sirius happy. So he smiles a little.

"Fine. What did you have in mind?"

.

It's late, but Harry still hasn't been allowed back into the house. Not until he finishes shoveling snow to clear the driveway. It's pointless since the snow will be back in the morning and he will have to come out again before his uncle has to leave for work to do it all over once more, but politely pointing that out to his uncle only earned him his current black eye and another night without dinner.

His hands hurt the most since the rest of his body is completely numb from the cold, but it's a kind of pain he can ignore. Despite the way his body is shivering, he is grateful to be as far from his family as he can get.

He isn't very lucky, though, as the door opens and Dudley's ugly head pokes out, grinning.

"You need to hurry. You have to clean Mum and Dad's bathroom before they go to bed."

Harry glares at him.

"I cleaned it this morning," he says through chattering teeth.

"Doesn't look clean to me," the fat boy answers before exploding in squealing laughter and running inside the house.

Harry sighs, defeated, and tries to hurry with the snow-shoveling so he can get both things done fast.

But then he's startled and flinches as a large dog starts barking at him from across the street.

The man accompanying the dog looks confused.

They both approach him and Harry stays still, not sure what to say once they reach the fence. He has never seen this man before. Is he a new neighbor?

"Hey, little one," he says softly, and Harry could swear he sees the man's eyes brimming with tears, but it's too dark to be sure.

"H-hello." Harry answers, but he doesn't move from his spot.

Remus stares at the spitting image of James and his heart clenches. The kid is small and scrawny, and the werewolf cannot figure for the life of him why he would be in threadbare clothing in the middle of winter shoveling snow at almost eight p.m., but there is a sinking feeling in his gut.

"What are you doing out here all alone?"

Sirius growls a little when he makes out the dark purple shade around Harry's eye.

"I…" Harry knows he's not supposed to talk to strangers, but he is not supposed to go inside until he's done with the snow either, so he is kind of out of options.

The door to the house opens suddenly, and his aunt looks like she is about to yell before she notices the man standing at the fence. Her eyes widen and she closes her mouth before looking disgustedly at the large, black dog.

"Harry, dear," she says, her tone strained but sweet somehow. "What are you doing out here? You're going to get sick. Come in so I can put some more medicine on that eye."

Harry nods, knowing full well that she is putting on a show in front of the man so he won't suspect anything.

"Sorry," he mutters out of habit before walking inside.

He stays close by, knowing his Aunt will want to reprimand him after she sends the man away.

"Can I help you?" she asks sternly.

Remus swallows a little. This woman looks nothing like Lily.

"No, my apologies. I was just worried about the little boy."

"Yes, he sneaks out sometimes to do mischief. He's rebellious like that. Now if you don't mind, we don't appreciate strangers lurking around our residence."

"Is that a bruise on his face?" Remus blurts out. Sirius growls again.

Petunia looks at the dog again with disgust and a little fear.

"Yes, he gets into a lot of fights around the neighborhood." she bites out, her teeth clenched.

Remus opens his mouth to say something, but she slams the door shut. He looks down at Sirius, at the ears pinned behind his head and the hair on his neck standing straight up.

"It's ok, Padfoot. We'll come back tomorrow. There's not much we can do now."

Sirius growls and refuses to move. Petunia looks out the window again, no doubt to check if they're gone, and glares at them. Remus tries to step in her shoes: a raggedy, worse-for-wear man with a giant stray dog stalking her young nephew and her house is definitely cause for concern.

"She will call the cops, Pads, please."

Sirius sighs and agrees to be dragged back across the street and a few blocks away so they can apparate back to Grimauld.

As soon as Petunia sees them walking away, she walks back to the foyer where Harry is patiently waiting, still shivering.

"Did you say anything to that man?"

"No, Aunt Petunia," he says.

She steals a glance at Vernon, who has been so focused on the TV that he didn't even notice what just happened. She debates whether to let him know or not, but as she glances back at the evident fear in Harry's eyes and the way he is shaking, a small pang of pity twists her gut. She hates the little kid, but truth is he hasn't done anything wrong, and the anger from him damaging Dudley's ball has already dissipated somewhat.

"Finish your inside chores and get into your cupboard." Harry nods hastily and rushes to the cupboard to get cleaning supplies. Petunia glares at him for a second before going over to her husband. "The boy will finish shoveling tomorrow. I don't want him getting sick and avoid his chores tomorrow."

Vernon rolls his eyes but can't care enough to complain, so he says nothing.

The mess Dudley left in the bathroom is insane, and it takes Harry a long time to clean it. By the time he is done, he walks out to find his uncle sitting on his bed, glaring at him.

"I've been waiting to retire to bed for ages, boy. What the ruddy hell took so long?"

"I'm sorry, Uncle Vernon. It's ready now," he answers in a small voice.

"Why the hell wasn't it ready before I got home from work?"

Harry debates his next words carefully, trying to push his anger down. The man stands up and walks closer to him.

"It was, but…"

"But?"

"D-Dudley messed it up again," he says in a low voice. He knows it will get him in trouble, but he refuses to admit he actually did something wrong, the small prideful voice inside of him warring with his self-preservation.

"Are you honestly going to accuse my son of something right now? I have not forgotten what you pulled two days ago, and if I'm honest I don't think the punishment was enough."

Harry glares at the floor, aching to complain, but the pain in his back and face is still too sharp, and the hollow ache of hunger claws at him. He doesn't want to miss the opportunity for breakfast.

"I'm sorry."

Vernon backhands him, sending him tumbling to the ground.

"Get out of my sight."

As he rushes out, Dudley trips him in the hallway. It takes every inch of strength within his tiny body to get up despite his screaming lungs and back, and even more to refrain from lashing out at his cousin. He just wants to get back into his cupboard and sleep.

.

"We'll return tomorrow, Sirius," Remus says as the other man paces back and forth in the kitchen.

"There is something really wrong here, Remus. He had a black eye and was outside in the middle of winter. He didn't have a coat on."

"Would it honestly surprise you if he turned out as rebellious as James?" Remus answered although doubt was also nagging at the back of his head.

"There is a difference between pulling pranks and getting into a fight that would result in a bruised face."

"Need I remind you of how many times you and Snape and his posse gave each other bloody noses?"

Sirius rolls his eyes. It's true - perhaps Harry had a Snivellus of his own. The thought made him smile a little again.

"I won't do anything brash tonight, Remus. But tomorrow we are paying a visit to those bastards and putting an end to this once and for all."

Remus sighs and, despite himself, nods at his old friend.