FEDORA

The glowing blades moved at blinding speed, hissing, crackling, and throwing sparks when they clashed. Bakugo stumbled back, clumsily parrying the merciless onslaught of Izuku's lightsaber as it waded through severed mechanical limbs.

Violins played an intense melody, and a choir sang ominously in the background. Jirpo glared at Kaminari and said, "Could you turn it off? It's hurting my ears."

"Party pooper." Kaminari hit the stop button. The music kept playing.

Bakugo made a smokescreen, but Izuku's lightsaber swooped unerringly through the smoke. Katsuki's katana spun from his grasp.

"It appears I win," Izuku said. "That was a fun game."

Bakugo chuckled. "You fool. Do you really think that was my final form? Behold!"

Bakugo put on a fedora. His posture slouched, a greasy five-o-clock shadow covered his chin, and pimples dotted his face. He reached out, and the katana leapt back to his hand. This time, Izuku went on the defensive as Bakugo's glowing katana left afterimages in its wake.

"This is highly illogical," Izuku said. "I detect no traces of technology that could explain this phenomenon."

"Of course you wouldn't understand," Katsuki drawled. "You're a robot. This fedora was stitched together by hand, with fibers harvested from silkworms fed on a strict diet of Shonen Jump manga. I infused a hatred of robots and a desire of all things weeaboo in every stitch. While you studied how to take over the world, I studied the blade. You cannot defeat me now!"

While Izuku's hands blurred to automatically block Bakugo's strikes, Izuku looked over his shoulder. "Mother, permission to activate my final form?"

"It's not the final fight yet. Use the booster module."

"Understood." Izuku's body opened, exposing a core of green plasma. His entire body lit up with glowing lines, and metal grew outward. With one swing, Izuku knocked Bakugo off the pile of robot parts they were fighting on.

"It's over, Bakugo. I have the high ground."

"You underestimate my power!"

"Don't try it."

Bakugo leapt high in the air, screaming, hair glowing incandescent as he reached peak anime. Izuku parried his sword, and his fist slammed into Bakugo's jaw.

The fedora went flying. Bakugo's features regressed into his normie self, and he skidded towards the edge of Columbia. His fingers caught the edge as he went over.

Ochako came running over. "Hold on, I got you!"

Inko blanched. "No, you idiot! Don't do it!"

Ochako grabbed him and nullified his gravity. As Bakugo floated up, a ripple surged through the floating city. Inko's Quirk Amplifier burned like a star, and she pulled everyone towards her.

The city collapsed on itself, forming a tiny black sphere that sucked in all the light around it. The planet warped, stretching towards the black hole, and Inko strained to keep it away.

Izuku floated towards the black hole. Before it could suck him in, Izuku opened his mouth and bit down. The gravity vanished as Izuku chewed and swallowed.

A nebula drifted out when Izuku belched.

497

Bakugo, giving Momo her katana back: *tips fedora* M'lady

Momo: Do that again and I will fund a robot army to actually take over the world