RADIOACTIVE

Bakugo limped in, dragging a portable IV behind him. His hair had all fallen out, his cheeks had a gaunt, sunken appearance, and dark bags hung heavy under Bakugo's eyes.

Aizawa's jaw dropped. "Bakugo, you need to go to the hospital."

"And let them make me weak? I know big pharma's in bed with the robot menace. The machines promised them power, bitches, and cocaine."

"Bakugo, you have cancer."

"I'm a Taurus!" Bakugo roared. "And I'm healthier than ever! All those chemicals the robots put in the water, I've cleansed from my body with the power of holistic medicines and essential oils!" Bakugo chugged a bottle of lavender oil and stuck another radium bracelet around his wrist.

"Please tell me you didn't put any of that in the IV bag."

"This?" Bakugo shook the bag, and it ominously glowed green. "Nah, this is to power up my Quirk."

"To power up - please tell me that's not uranium."

"What? No! Why would I use such wimpy crap? This right here is plutonium. I beat up some terrorists trying to build a time machine."

"Bakugo no."

"Bakugo yes!" Bakugo raised his gauntlet and shouted, "Ultimate Liberation of Mankind - Nuclear Armageddon!"

All of Japan trembled as they faced a nuclear attack for the third time in history. Radioactive ash hung like a veil over the ruined crater of Musutafu. At its epicenter, U.A. stood entirely unscathed by the nuclear blast. Cementoss' concrete architecture stood proudly amidst the blighted landscape, and the campus' trees siphoned heavy metals out of the air.

Kirishima looked out the window, saw the scorched earth stretching for miles, and said, "Bro, that's neat. Looks like we're doing nuclear warfare exercises today."

Aizawa lowered his scarf and hesitantly looked at ground zero. Bakugo stood cackling, his arms twisted and mutated with cancerous growths into fleshy effigies resembling alligator arms. His skin peeled away, revealing gray scales underneath, and his eyes glowed green with sickly radioactive decay.

"Deku!" Bakugo bellowed. "Today, mankind celebrates its Independence Day!"

"You realize it was the anniversary for Hiroshima, right?" Aizawa asked scornfully.

Bakugo ran head-first through a wall. His slitted pupils darted back and forth until they focused on a roomba sucking nuclear ash off the sidewalks. "Die!"

Bakugo bit into the roomba and ripped it to pieces with his teeth. With acid saliva dripping from his reptilian jaws, Bakugo lumbered on to his next victim. A car blared its alarm horns, with its rear half incinerated to dust just beyond U.A.'s boundary wall. Bakugo raised a leg and stomped it flat, piercing its roof with giant talons protruding from misshapen feet.

With a bestial roar, Bakugo turned towards the dorm building. He caught the scent of hot metal and synthetic skin that clung to Midoriya. "Deku! Your tyranny is at an end! Face me!"

Izuku looked out the window and saw a giant scaly monster shouting at him. "Oh boy. Is it my turn to show off my Hero Move?"

499

Therapist, to a Roomba: Deathclaw-Bakugo can't hurt you. He's not real.

Deathclaw-Bakugo: *background screech of kaiju rage*