Chapter Thirteen: The Road Continues

The next morning we woke up very early, even before sunrise to head out as soon as possible. I was one of the very few who weren't dreadfully hung over on elvish wine. Bofur was throwing up on the trail and Fili was basically hauling Kili along. As expected, Thorin had little sympathy for those who were feeling sick.

Gandalf had instructed Thorin to take us and leave as quickly and quietly as possible while he stayed behind to speak to Lord Elrond and more guardians of the realm, whoever that would be. We were to stay in the mountains until he joined us again, but from the sounds of it, that was still going to be a long journey.

We left Rivendell behind as the sun rose over the horizon and began to glow on the city. We escaped into the narrow paths into the mountains and I did look back one more time, enjoying the beautiful view, before leaving it behind. I hoped one day, maybe when relations between elves and dwarves were better, I would be able to return and enjoy their hospitality again. Especially the hot springs and the patios where I could enjoy every angle of the horizon and landscape. I think I could spend weeks there, wandering the halls and enjoying their culture.

I had made good memories there that I would hold onto for forever, I hoped I would have the same if I ever was able to return.

Relaxation was over though, we hit the trails very hard for the next few weeks. It was so much more difficult without the horses and ponies, walking all day and sometimes late into the night if we weren't in a good place to make camp. And since we were walking along a lot of thin trails, a lot of the time there weren't a lot of good places to stop and rest unless we were in a long stretch of open land. Even when we stopped there though it was windy and cold.

We were making our way across the Misty Mountains, and unfortunately because of the higher altitude it made hunting animals more difficult. Kili took down mountain goats which was a huge win, but most other animals in the area were either bears or squirrels, both animals we were not going to waste arrows on. Generally that made everyone more cranky since we were eating and sleeping significantly less.

Dwalin and I almost went at it over hunting strategies, since he knew more about mountain animals while I generally knew more about hunting. Turns out we should have just been listening to Kili, who had experience in both and had the best luck with getting food for us. Dwalin isn't one to apologize but we bonded over helping Kili with the goats and being able to provide something for dinner. So, like siblings, we forgot about the whole thing.

Either way, all of us were hungry, sleep deprived, and completely on edge. Especially on one of the most miserable days when we were on a very thin trail through the mountain pass on a horribly rainy day. The rock face was so slippery as it washed down and rushed across our feet. The rain was ice cold as well and we had to hold onto each other's coats since we could hardly see in front of ourselves in the dark.

"We must find shelter!" Thorin shouted over the slapping of the rain.

I wanted nothing more than to find a place out of the rain to warm up just a bit but I thought the likelihood of that happening was slim to none.

"Watch it! Watch it!" Dwalin shouted, letting go of my cape to point up into the sky. We all watched as a huge boulder flew across the gorge and crashed above us. We threw out backs against the wall and ducked as the pieces rained down on us.

Balin, at the front of the group with Thorin, urged us to take cover. "This is no thunder storm! It's a thunder battle! Look, stone giants!"

Out of the mountains came two extraordinary large monsters throwing pieces of the hills at each other. My legs froze, having never seen any living thing bigger than buildings! Terror seized my entire body.

Their fight shook the entire mountain and the path we stood on started to crumble under our feet, making it even thinner and parts falling out completely. Some of us had to jump across to make sure they didn't slide down the mountain, but then the entire face started to separate apart. We all looked up and we realized we were on another one of the stone giants!

The company was separated onto its two knees as it joined in on the battle. Somewhere amongst the wrestling and boulder throwing, the other group was able to jump off and get back onto the trail, but my group was not as lucky. We just had to hold onto the slick rocks for dear life as debris fell all around us and got swung around like fleas on a dog.

The stone giant we rode got knocked around where we somehow were facing the other group that was slightly safer on the mountain. The knees moved in closer as the giant received the impact of another hit, but it was falling!

Thorin yelled, "Jump! Hurry jump!"

The others leapt onto the ledge but my fear had gotten the best of me and kept me on the giant until the impact of it hitting the mountain sent me flying into the wall. I tried to grab onto anything I could, scrambling for a grip as I slid further and further down. The ledge was not nearly thick enough for me to get my footing so I kept sliding and panicking until my fingers were able to grab onto it with all the might I could muster.

My breathing heaved, knowing I was already losing grip on the edge. The rain hid the tears that flooded out of my eyes. I was scared to death.

The other group hurried across to where we had all landed. They found the others pretty much safe but didn't know where I had gone. I found my voice, though it trembled and shook and could barely be made out in the storm.

"H-Help! Hurry please!" I closed my eyes and shouted even louder. "I'm gonna fall! Help! OVER HERE!"

The dwarves threw themselves at the ledge to grab me but my fingers slid and I screamed, falling down the rocks. I grabbed onto the next ledge, a few feet lower but out of reach of Ori and Bofur who had been the closest. I stared up at them, shaking and just trying to keep enough grip to not go further.

"Lydia! Hold on!" Bofur shouted. "Come on! We need to reach!"

"I can't-I can't hold on!" Even though I was grabbing so hard I was sure my fingers were bleeding, the rain washed away any grip I had. I tried adjusting my grip and trying to get leverage with my legs but it just kept sliding more and more.

My heart dropped and my brain kept saying over and over again, 'I'm going to die, I'm going to die, I'm going to die'.

"Grab me!" Thorin ordered Dwalin. They joined hands as Thorin jumped off the edge and reached down to me. He was just barely out of reach and couldn't grab me. "Lydia, you can get to me! Come on!"

I could feel the hot tears streaming down my cheeks, and I had run out of hold on the rock. With my final bit of effort, I pushed up on the wall with my feet and got just enough lift for me to be able to grab onto his sleeve. He gripped me back and I sobbed. Thorin didn't let go for a moment while the dwarves pulled us back up onto the trail.

I was thrown up onto the ledge where I kneeled there for a moment on my hands and knees, staring down and forcing myself to breathe as water dripped from my hair.

Fili touched my shoulder, "Lydia-?"

I got back onto my feet, slid between them and kept marching up the trail. I wiped my wet face into my shoulder and I'm sure I was still shaking, but my fear drove me forward and away from the stone giants as quick as possible.

We were extremely fortunate to come across a cave pretty quickly. As soon as I spotted it I could breathe a little better but there was no doubt I had been shaken. While everyone filed into the cave for shelter, searched to make sure it was safe and prepared a fire, I separated myself from the group. Thorin gave orders on who should do what, but if he told me to do anything I would not have heard him. I just tucked myself back away from everyone.

In a dark nook I removed my cloak and riding clothes that were completely soaked through, leaving me in my undershirt. My wet curls slicked to my face and to my body as I shivered and tried to calm down.

I crunched myself into a ball, trying to force myself to control my breathing and to also warm up a little. But still slight streams dripped out of my eyes, which frustrated and embarrassed me so I wiped them away angrily.

"Lydia?" Bofur said, walking back into my area of the cave.

I tucked further out of sight. "I'm getting changed out of my wet clothes, please don't come back here."

"Oh of course. Just wanted to check in to see if you were hurt at all. Thorin said there was blood on his coat."

"Fuck," I leaned my head back against the cave wall and I looked at my fingers, "please apologize to him for me. It's just my fingers from holding onto the ledge. I'm fine. Just…apologize to him about the entire thing, it's so stupid."

"Stupid? Do you mean what just happened? It's not like hanging off the edge of a mountain was fun for you," he scoffed.

"Of course not, but…I…nevermind."

"Out with it, I can't tell Thorin anything unless you tell me something."

"Please just apologize to him. I want to dry off a bit and I don't want to stripped down to basically nothing around everyone. I'm just going to stay over here for a while."

"Okay? Are you sure you don't want a buddy just to stay up with? Everyone else is going to bed and I'm on the first watch."

I was hesitant, Bofur wasn't exactly the most soft hearted of the entire group. But I just wanted to be better for the company, and I didn't want times like that of fear to happen to me again. I'm going to be going up against worse things than stone giants in the future, after all.

"I guess…if you don't mind. You said everyone is going to bed?"

"Yeah, most are already asleep since Thorin didn't want us to start any fires that could bring any attention to us."

I squeezed the water out of my pants and took a deep breath. I then peaked a little bit around the corner so I could see him a bit better. I whispered, "Bofur, out of this entire journey, today is the first day I genuinely thought I was going to die out there."

"Really? The first just today?" I nodded. "Well, then you're a lot more optimistic or naive than we thought."

"Oh thanks, I was going to ask for some advice or something but I guess I should just be terrified all the time."

"I'm only joking Lydia," he chuckled. "We were not in control in that situation at all, it was scary."

"We weren't in control, but I felt like I lost control over myself. I was crying and unable to hold on and couldn't do anything because I was so petrified. I was acting like a childish fool in front of everyone, and once again I got into a situation where I needed to be saved."

"No one thinks that way about you. You know that too."

"I just…don't want to ever feel like that again." I wiped the tears out of my eyes and got my heartbeat to slow a little. "I mean, I know we're going to keep running into trouble on this journey. I'll be stealing from Smaug. I just…"

"I understand what you mean, Lydia. Do you want my advice?"

"Yes, I really do."

"I think you just need to train."

"Train? Like with my sword?"

"With your sword. With your bow. Get stronger, faster, more stealthy. The more confident you are that you can handle something when shit hits the ceiling, the more likely you are to actually make it through. Trust me, almost none of us are warriors like Thorin and Dwalin, but we're at least able to fake it sometimes because we have trained."

I remembered back to when Thorin had suggested the same exact thing back in Rivendell. "I would definitely love to train! I only barely know how to use my sword so I think that having some training would help a lot."

"You're not always going to be able to stay out of trouble though, so it's okay to rely on everyone to help. We've all been in the dumb situations on this journey so far, you're certainly not the only one who's gotten scared."

I pressed my lips together, nodding at the idea. "So you don't think I should just pack everything up and go back to Bree? I'm not hopeless?"

"Of course not, Lass! Were you considering that?"

"No, no. I know that I'm not a dwarf and this is the homecoming mission that you've all been destined for, but I just want to be useful to all of you. For so long I thought the end of my days were going to be spent in the Prancing Pony, so I guess this whole journey for you all to belong somewhere again has made me feel like I finally belong somewhere. Ugh, that was too cheesy wasn't it?"

"A bit," he snickered, "but I like it. And I want you to know Lydia, you're just as much one of us as any other member. Not a single person here would dispute that."

I gave him a grateful nod and then stood up to put my wet clothes on. If I was going to go to bed, I needed to put them back on as much as I didn't want to. "Thank you for helping me work through that Bofur, you're a lot smarter than the others give you credit for."

"What the hell does that mean?!"

I laughed quietly, not trying to wake anyone up and swung my bag onto my back. I grabbed my sword to tie it back to my side but when I grabbed it though, I could see a hint of glow coming from the space in the scabbard. I furrowed my eyebrows and eased the sword up with my thumb to get a more clear look.

It was glowing bright blue.

A mechanical rattling came from the floor and the walls around us. Bofur and I rushed into the main part of the cave and hurried to wake everyone up, pulling them up onto their feet and shaking them. Most had heard the commotion and were up but there was nothing we could do when the floor opened below us.

None of us had time to grab onto anything besides each other as we fell down the rock tunnels below us and we fell deeper and deeper into the mountain.