MINETATALE

"Any idea how deep this goes?"

"Only one way to find out."

Bakugo threw Mineta inside. He hit the side of a wall, slammed crotch-first into a tree root, and plopped like a scoop of jelly onto a field of yellow flowers.

"Oh my," a gentle voice said. "Are you alright?"

Mineta looked up. A radiant figure in a purple robe towered over him, hand stretched out, bending down just far enough to give Mineta a glimpse of heaven.

"I've never been better in my life."

"Poor thing. You must have a concussion. Some pie will fix you up."

"I'd rather have a taste of your cake, if you know what I mean."

"I, uh, cake? I'm afraid I'm out of baking soda, and everyone complains I don't put enough snails in them."

Toriel led him through the ruins. Despite the breathtaking gothic architecture and alluring glow of mushrooms and moss, Mineta's eyes remained firmly glued on the tantalizing dessert just within reach. His hand crept forward, slowly, carefully, for the barest touch of divinity. Her robe grazed his fingertips, and eagerly, he leaned further forward-

The ground disappeared beneath his feet. His arm nearly wrenched itself out of his socket as the goat lady hoisted him out of the abyss.

"Please watch your step!" She chided him. "These puzzles can be very dangerous."

At the ruined mansion, Toriel sat him in a chair. The moment he heard clanging in the kitchen, Mineta wandered off. She said not to go downstairs, but hadn't mentioned the bedrooms. One looked plain and dusty. The other beckoned him with its big wooden dresser, its drawers ajar, and a hanging sock teasing him from their depths. Mineta tiptoed inside.

He rummaged through the drawers, disappointed by all the baggy robes, until he noticed a suspicious bundle at the back. He opened it and froze in awe.

"Child? Are you tired, would you like me to get you a glass of milk?" She froze as she saw Mineta, hands deep in her unmentionables.

Mineta nervously asked, "Are you offering that straight from the tap?"

Asgore's door slammed open. Toriel stormed inside, holding Mineta by the scruff of his neck, and said, "You can have this one."

Asgore raised his trident. "Child. I am so sorry to do this, but we need-"

"He went through my lingerie."

"I am no longer sorry!"

As the trident plunged, Toriel shouted, "Wait!"

Mineta cracked an eye open. "You're letting me live?"

"Let me do it."

Mineta shrieked as the scepter skewered him. Asgore and Toriel waited, but no soul disappeared.

"That's strange," Asgore said. "Did he really not have a soul?"

Toriel snorted. "That would explain a lot."

Mineta screamed as his body reassembled itself in Nezu's office. Nezu handed the glowing purple heart to the imp, and it disappeared in sulfurous flames.

"Good news, that contract you signed to enroll at U.A. protected your soul. Bad news, Satan has it now, but you were heading there anyways."

500

sans: well I guess you could say he got himself in a 'sticky' situation! thank you everyone, i'll be here next thursday.

Also, we interrupt this broadcast I'll probably regret making in the morning to bring you relatively unimportant news. If you're one of the two people keeping up with One Small Step, you've seen this already, but who knows, maybe I did it in a silly accent this time.

If you've been keeping tabs on me the past few years, you might have noticed that I post a lot of stories on Christmas day. I'm still going to do that, but this year will be a touch different.

Starting on the 1st of December, I will release a new short story, with chapters sprinkled throughout the month and a finale on Christmas Day. Let's just say it involves hot chocolate, cozy vibes, and KFC. Also on Christmas Day, I will release the first chapter of two other short stories, which will have chapter updates once a month on an alternating biweekly schedule. In other words, Story A will get a chapter, then story B two weeks later. One Small Step will also get another chapter drop Christmas Day, as well as maybe a IMTBJ chapter and possibly another Deku Ex Christmas special if Saint Nick's done with his therapy.

In the meantime, stay safe out there, and don't let the Black Friday shoppers bite you. I hear it's contagious.