A/N: This chapter gives you more info into their very rare type of bond as mates in my AU

Also, highly advise listening to The Most Beautiful Thought by Forest Blakk

Ch 11: Ritual Exchange

Lux was an anxious mess for days waiting, experiencing his own intense pain as well. The swell of his scent and pheromones were even more intense than usual within his room, trying to reach its target without doing much but irritating his own beast. Every day he would go down her hall and chase away any lingering faunus attracted by her pheromones but he would leave before she could try to reach out to him, unable to withstand the sound of her pain without feeling it cracking at his seams. He was doing his best in this mess to be patient but it was definitely not easy.

Masturbation was no help. It only further frustrated him and increased his dysphoria. He of course tried by now, but it left him in a mess of irritation, intense gender dysphoria to the point he couldn't even look at his body, a cold sweat, and more destruction to the room around him. Right now, he was sitting behind his flipped and shoved couch that had rips in the fabric, elbows resting on his knees and breathing heavily, hiding his face in one hand and growling lightly in his throat, frustrated tears on his face. He had wrapped his body in a massive t-shirt and tight binder, not caring that it was harder to breathe at the moment and had a pillow hiding his waist from his sight, currently unable to even see it without feeling a swell of dark feelings and emotions he couldn't bear right now.

Several days into his heat was already too many in his opinion. What he wouldn't give for the money to have these organs removed and be done with all this. This week every year in his adult life was the most dysphoria inducing, mentally wrecking time he had to go through of all. He already had intense bite marks in his lower lip, wrists and nail marks scratched deep into his arms to distract himself from the terrible feelings he was going through, his wrists and lip torn asunder from his mating fangs exposed due to Azure's general proximity in their heats.

He ran his fingers up across his sweat slick skin and over closed eyes through damp hair and flattened his tender ears, leaning back into the devastated furniture behind him with a deep slow exhale trying to calm himself uselessly. He went through this ritual routine before going to check on Azure's doorway every day in order to steel himself enough to be able to leave without caving. Each day it got harder but with how he was feeling, even if he wanted to let her in right now he couldn't handle it without snapping into a dark abysmal mental fallout over his body. However, when he finally made it to his doorway and opened it, purple and red deep circles under his eyes and dried blood on his wrists and mouth, he was surprised by Lyra standing there, hand raised poised to knock, "Oh! Dear, you look worse than usual my boy. Hopefully, what you asked for helps."

She pulled a box from under her arm and offered it to him as her eyes scanned over his mangled mess. she didn't say anything. She had no way to help him with this in his life at the moment. He was mostly good about this struggle not going this far unless he was in heat and that was a rather delicate situation that was full of difficulty in trying to have deep conversation. One's inner beast could be hard to control or predict and while she wished they had someone, there wasn't anyone on the base that could give him any sort of therapy. It was her only regret about how unlawful their practices were. It meant she couldn't get him any true help. She might not actually care about a lot of people, but she did care about the boy she found suffering and raised.

He stared down at the box and his eyes dilated as his chest began to heave sharp deep breaths and his body trembled. At least she could help him this much which was some sort of relief as his hand reached and took it, holding it tight to himself. Before he darted into his room, she touched his arm firmly, "Loosen the top. I mean it. The correct size Lux. It's a rule. My only condition for what I had to do to get this for you. Understand?"

He growled a very feral sound like a pack leader but then whimpered and rubbed his tired face and nodded, gasping a bit from the constricted lungs. He closed the door and leaned against it, hugging the box. His eyes were watering. It was like a weight was lifting and he could see some light in his darkness. Some affirmation that he could be more whole, more himself right there in his grasp. The way it already felt was overwhelming in his soul and he hadn't even opened it yet.

First, he ripped off the shirt and grabbed the proper fitting binder, closing his eyes tight so he didn't see while he swapped them, gasping at full breaths of air and raw sore bones before rubbing the ache when the other one was on and the shirt was back on. Once that was over, he sat down and slowly opened the box with trembling hands and instantly he was sobbing with intense joy and overwhelming emotions. There in the box was a certified prosthetic, average size, colored realistically to anatomical correctness that matched his exact skin, with proper details and all. It was designed with the ability to attach and function like true anatomy via syncing with one's aura though it would drain it rapidly at first, once it was properly matched, it would not need to use the aura at all to be linked to it. Only the first few days would be rough but he was fully ok with that. He would easily let himself be plunged into darkness to allow all his aura to go towards this instead if it meant getting hours of his day out of feeling whole and like the real him for once.

The item could even sense one's arousal and go from flaccid to hard, though due to being fake it didn't grow so it was just always the size it was. That was fine with Lux. He could care less if he had a large size soft if it meant he felt normal. IT was even capable of using his aura to allow the touch and feeling to transfer to his body and actually be felt, and transfer his bodily functions of all kinds through it though he knew during the beginning it when it was draining at his aura it would be very intense and sensitive, almost triple what would be considered normal if not more.

Right now though, in the throes of his heat, all he could think about was feeling like himself and finding Azure and being the male he was meant to be and going to take care of his mate in agony, his mate who he desperately needed and who needed him. His mate who he had been painfully denying because of how inadequate he felt in this body. Nervous but excited fingers fumbled to add the item to his body, struggling in his shorts a bit he was so anxious. The moment it touched his body he felt the unpleasant static like shock to his body and watched the silver shimmer across his body as his aura linked and sealed it to his form, the edges so thin they seemed nonexistent which only felt more real.

His hand covered his mouth and tears left his face more rapidly as he sobbed, just staring, his smile so wide on his face it hurt and his shoulders shook, "I… c-can't… believe it… it's…it's really me… finally…"

It took him a bit longer than he liked to console his weeping joy and gather himself, tucking into his boxer briefs awkwardly with untrained hands and pulling back up the loose sleep shorts, his baggy shirt helping a lot. He didn't care about cleaning his messy form up or putting on any socks even. He wanted Azure right now. Needed her. Knew she was in just as much if not more pain and needed him. He had to explain, had to hold her, mark her, be with her more than he needed air to breathe. Nothing else mattered now. He was complete and could be her everything now that he was whole. No more hiding out of fear or insecurity or self-loathing.

He stumbled from his room and set out straight for her room, his mind easily fogging in his clear determination, his beast eager and hungry for what it would finally be allowed to have, body heating up a bit inside and the ache intense. Slowly, his vision went dark as his aura was concentrated on his lower body, his hand guiding him along the wall and keeping count of paces and turns. When he made it he could hear the hungry whimpers of the stalking males and growled a deep, guttural feral sound like an alpha wolf of a pack hunter, commanding dominance even without any alpha energy present.

One alpha there growled back in a challenge, sniffing around him confused at Lux's heat pheromones but when nails scratched his cheek harshly and Lux growled deeply again, the group scattered, not looking for a fight and, without any heat to fog their own brains, they didn't have the same lack of sense. No one was dumb enough to hurt Lux or risk getting blamed for whatever mess it seemed he had already been in with his wounds and risk Lyra's wrath. Azure could hear him out there, in a ball on the floor covered in a thin layer of her own sweat, in a tank top and underwear and nothing else.

She was in so much agony she had hardly moved much most of today. Her own lower lip is also a mess from her fangs. When she didn't hear him leave this time, her ears perked, swiveling towards the door with weak tired eyes. But when he knocked eagerly, she all but rushed to her feet, barely carrying herself to the door in a rush, whimpering in need as she scratched at the touch pad in her haze until punching it with a primal snarl and it flickered a moment, the locks releasing. She threw open the door and he slipped in quickly, grasping her to him as she fell into his embrace, needy whimpers mixing together in a deep kiss as the door closed and the locks engaged.

Her felt around her back until he found a spot to hold, pressing her tightly to himself, his tongue pressing past her mangled lower lip and sliding along her sharp mating fangs until it slipped between teeth and tangled with hers in a delicate but hungry tango, two sets of ears folding back with eyes closed. This time, as her hips pressed to his, she could feel the rapidly hardening bulge at his lower center and she moaned into his lips, grinding into him so desperately she was shaking all over, pouncing into his grasp and clinging to him with every bit of her strength.

The energy in the room felt like a wonderful calm one can feel before a storm, that most blissful peace and silence it has but as if that storm doesn't come with devastation but with a fierce fury of passion. Like the gentleness of a cool breeze and the sweet embrace of love and safety only the heart knows. their scents mixing like fresh rain in a garden at dawn, making a beautiful smell in their nostrils that was intoxicating. He easily caught her when she pounced him, holding her against him as her legs grasped his waist, a deep gasp breaking their lips with a jolt sharply in his spine at the feeling of her grinding against his length so fully, the new sensations almost overwhelming.

He followed his senses of what he knew of the layout of these rooms in his darkness and led them to the bed, laying her back and leaning over her. He could smell and hear her laying there, whining at him, grasping for him, pulling at his skirt, rocking her hips up into him, the dampness of her saturated underwear rubbing into his own clothing and making him shiver. God he wished he could see how beautiful she was in this moment right now. His hand reached, running across her face and feeling every inch. He could feel her take a breath and calm herself enough to press her features into his hand, grabbing it and running it along her lips, "You… can't see me right now… can you?"

He whined painfully and shook his head, "N-no… but I wish I could… Azure… you are the most beautiful thing these eyes have ever been blessed to see…"

Her whimper made his heart shudder happily. She loved that. Clearly, no one has ever made her feel so wonderful. But he wasn't going to stop here. His hand ran down to her chest, stopping over her heart to feel the racing pounding beat. It made his blood rush and thunder in his ears and he could feel her heavy breaths. They didn't have long before the heat took them both entirely. The soft purring and growling at each other had already faded into the background like a comfortable blanket of white noise soothing their inner beasts in the most blissful joy, their energy in a coil of each other and nearly undefinable from each other.

She placed her hand over his, "W…why did you deny me all this time…"

It was he who let out the pained noise this time as she watched his ears droop and his head hang in shame, "I… Azure I… was scared… I'm not… I've never been… this is so hard…"

Suddenly, he felt a soothing warm touch on his cheek, stroking away the stained wet from earlier, "Just tell me. Even if it's awful… I'm not leaving… Don't you understand? Somehow… in this weird twisted world… I'm in love with you."

He whined and shook at her words, his beast shaking madly with pleasure, "Azure I… I was born female… I can't stand it… it's not me… I… didn't want you to know… to see me like that… then you put off scenting for males in your heat and I… I just couldn't take it… I panicked…"

He felt her face rubbing into his as she pulled him close, barely hanging on to her mind with him so close but doing her best. It was for sure a lot to take in but right now she was just glad it wasn't because she was wrong or made a mistake and that he was finally here with her. She rubbed her face into his until he calmed his painful whimpers, "Lux… none of that matters. You are enough. We can work out the rest. I'm sorry I'm not able to say more… my brain is so gone right now… but I only want you. Only need you. I've always seen you as a boy even when we first met. Besides…"

She licked along his wounded lower lip making him whine and squirm as her leg lifted and pressed against the throbbing tent in his shorts, making him practically shout in both surprise and pleasure, her lips brushing to his wolf ear, "Doesn't seem to me like it will matter anyway now does it? I… I've never been with anyone before. I don't know the difference and I'm never going to need to know anyone but you. Unf… I can smell your rut. I can't take this anymore. Dammit Lux, just mate me already please."

He could feel her flex her energy at him, rolling him beneath herself and leaning into him, listening to him pant as she growled against his neck. Her energy shifted rapidly into an alpha stance and his quickly submitted to her reflexively, whimpering as she slid her thighs to his sides and grinded her core along his bulge, long drawn moans leaving her against his skin. Her nails gripped into his shirt, tugging at the fabric until it tore along the front. He twitched at her agitated snarl at his binder blocking her from his skin but she was mindful of it, not damaging it as she pressed her hands into his chest and roamed the flattened expanse hungrily.

Her breath was hot against his neck as her tongue lavished at the spot above his trachea just above his sternum and collarbone but below his small adam's apple, where his scent was drawing her beast the strongest. Between her tongue on his neck, the feeling of her moans and heavy breaths crawling his skin, her hands exploring his chest, and her long drawn out rolls of her hips dragging her sex across his, he was losing his mind, squirming and whining madly in her grasp, his beast vibrating with heated sexual energy for her, letting her beast grip his tightly and squeeze. His hips jerked from the sensitive stimulation. Everytouch was a surprise to the blind faunus in the darkness, the thrill only adding to his brain plunging into his heat.

Azure referring to his heat as a rut had been so affirming to him, something no one had ever done that he never knew he needed until now and it meant so much to him in this moment he didn't even care that she always flexed her energy at him. He was quite alright with sub reflexing to her, more docile by nature himself. With both their minds lost to their carnal needs, Lux whimpered like a begging pup, squirming to his bones and the length throbbing madly as Azure let out a deep rumbling purr in response against him, her fingers dragging pressure down his torso until they tucked under the waistband of his shorts as she pressed herself harder against him, shivering.

Her mouth trailed back to his lips, dragging hers against the skin with her rumbled purring vibrating her entire being as she rolled against him, twitching at the feeling of finally having him pressed to her so intimately without him running away. The way he squirmed and whined was lighting her energy ablaze like a raging wildfire, enticing the alpha side of her neutral shifting energy and burning desire in her fogged riddled brain. Like a mouse he was helpless prey to the feline's needs and there was nowhere else he'd rather be. He couldn't see, but every sound had his silver ears swiveling and flicking wildly, driving him crazy with anticipation.

When her lips left his and both were panting, she leaned upright, hips in a constant, almost agonizing tease of slow swirls against him as she reached, pulling the tank top off her body and tossing it aside. Briefly, she stared down at him, eyes glossed over with primal hunger, hands roaming his lower belly slowly as he lay there, shirt ripped open exposing his chest binded in a flesh colored binder but otherwise his abdomen and clavicle were exposed to her. His head was tilted back in a pant, showing his neck in submission to her and his hands were gripping at her knees that rested by his sides, twitching as he squirmed at the sensations of every motion she made against the needy length beneath her.

It intoxicated her heat drowned brain knowing she was what he wanted and needed too, knowing how much she affected him. The purring grew louder and his ears swayed forward, locking in on her and a whine emitted from his lips that were agape. He almost cried when he felt her lift away but than gasped sharply as her hands dragged from his stomach down to his hips, along his thighs, back up the insides of his legs, one cupping around his solid rod as the other tucked fingers around the waistband gripping hold. As her hand squeezed and groped around the member, the aching sensation so new and startling he was jerking about and groaning loudly, her other tugged the shorts below the hip bones, fingers rubbing along sensitive skin.

Lux had to bite his lip to hold on, the sensations too new and intense he was worried he might cum now if he didn't. When her tongue ran across the fabric, he shook hard, gasping. His cheeks flushed but he was thankful when she didn't do it again. Azure was watching him closely. She had no experience once things get past basic things really and while instinct was plenty to help her figure out where to go and what to do, how to do it was all trial and error. What her beast did know for sure is that she would not waste their first release anywhere but together. Nothing else would do. If he was this sensitive, she had to control herself long enough first.

She wasn't bothered by this. She had him forever after tonight. She could enjoy foreplay later. In truth, she was in too much pain and too needy herself to really have patience for it in her heat anyway right now. She worked off the rest of his clothing and pulled off her own, sitting upon his thighs for a moment. If you really looked, you could tell it wasn't actually real. There were a few tells. But It was convincing enough that she couldn't tell in this state nor would she ever care. While she would never really have any interest in the anatomy beneath, real or fake this anatomy presented to her now would always be more than enough and she would always be sure he felt like he was enough. Her mate would never hurt over this again, at least not in the areas she could help with.

She leaned back over, growling in her purr, kissing him, feeling his hands wander her thighs and shivering at his touch. His eyes were closed as she kissed the lids. It made them both whimper knowing he couldn't see this moment but that sadness quickly faded as she pressed soaked folds petaled open and swollen with arousal against the underside of the twitching member, sliding herself up along it slowly. Gasps filled the space between them and their bodies jerked at the feeling, but she had no patience and neither did he. When she reached the tip, she pushed herself down onto it, her body easily stretching in her heat to accept it fully.

Fingers gripped her thighs as her hands grasped his shoulders and she moaned, tongue running along his lip until he granted her entry, sliding his along hers eagerly. The moment she began to rise and lower herself along him, his hips chasing her thrusting up with each push down, a feral need took them. It was fast, rough, messy. There was no patience, no gentle love making. That could wait for when they had their senses. Right now, they chased a heat driven need to soothe a deep ache within. In their states, it would be quick to achieve but neither cared. Finesse and stamina that had no place here. The end was the goal. How they got there was more of a burden than a pleasure at the moment.

Her hips were moving rapidly, riding along the pulsing length fully, burying him deep with each time her hips dropped to meet his hard thrusts up into her, the room filled with the animalistic sounds of groans and growls and the wet exchange of saliva and fluids. Nails dug into skin, teeth rubbed at flesh, both were so close as hips pounded into hips. As the apex of the moment approached, teetering on the edge, Azure growled loudly, latching teeth laced in the mating coating into his trachea and holding on. Lux released a whine that made her insides squirm with joy and pleasure before he licked and sniffed along her turned neck and latched his on into her neck below her ear, causing a sound to muffle into his neck from the feline.

It was all they needed to fall into that spine tingling abyss of bliss. Brains burning out and bodies locking in tense jerks as both rode through their climax together. When they came down, Lux was still moving his own hips though the motion was gentle, loving, slow, keeping her close and connected but feeling the rutting urge to not stop. He couldn't help giving himself his sight back briefly, letting himself see with his sense of smell, wanting to view her in all the vibrant color her scent painted her in.

As they laid there, teeth still latched into each other and his hips still pumping subtly, her satisfied purring calming his heart, both felt the odd sensation of dizziness and as if they were becoming light and weightless. Lux noticed it, only able to see it by chance as it carried a scent. Their beastial energy completely left their bodies into the air above them. A silver astral wolf form with bright white eyes bounced around a feline form but it wasn't a cat. He squinted. It was half the size of the wolf. Outlined in a deep blue glow but black in color with bright red eyes but when the light caught them they had a shimmer of gold. It had a sort of half length tail. Then he realized. It was a black bobcat. A very rare wild cat.

He watched the two as they seemed to dance with one another, rolling and playing in a blissful peace. The moment made his heart race and flutter, butterflies squirming in his stomach. It was beautiful the way it looked and how it corresponded with how he felt. Eventually, it became clear they were courting each other, the playing turning into rubbing and butting of heads, sliding along each other. He noticed as their courtship increased, so did his speed. He and Azure were still latched together by the teeth. He held her there, unsure if this would end if they let go. He wanted to see where this intimate moment went. She was moaning against his skin, her own hips rolling into his, already ready for more from him in her heat.

As the wolf was presented the bobcat's back end, raised high and granted permission, mounting the wild cat, Lux's thrusts matched and were growing eager and rapid, hungry. The sight was something, the bobcat and Azure both seemed to be squirming in pleasure, relaxing to the light flex from Lux and accepting him fully. The energy didn't have a sound but the cat seemed to be roaring and pushing back into the wolf in time with Azure's moans and whimpers as she rolled into each of Lux's pumping hims, faster and faster until both were twitching, groaning into skin, the wolf latching the nape of the bobcat and holding on until finally, in tandem, Lux and the wolf let go, heads leaned back and practically howling as the orgasm overtook him.

The feeling was so intense it took him a moment to get his vision to clear, feeling Azure gripping him so tightly her nails were craving into his skin and she was shaking as she came down, panting into his neck. Their fangs dissolved. He was eager to see the animals again, glad they were there but it was different. There were no forms but instead the colors swirling together until it mixed into a brilliant, soft, light blue color before it separated into two forms again. There standing together were the wolf and the bobcat but they were different.

The wolf had black at the tips of its ears and tail and feet, a fuller snout, thicker ear tufts and tufts on the jaws and he was slightly smaller. The bobcat was now the size of the wolf, the tail was bushy, and the snout was a bit narrower and longer, its outline to its black color now that light blue and it had a small fur saddle around the neck like wolves do. They then faded into pure waveforms and dissolved back into the two faunus. Lux was breathless. He was certain that it was unique and even more certain he was only able to witness it due to his special vision. The two also smelled exactly the same now. He couldn't help it, mumbling weakly, "B-beautiful…"

Azure rolled her head, looking up at him from his shoulder, "Hm?"

He smiled, turning to nuzzle her face. Now that they were fully bonded, the intensity from the heat was gone. They relaxed into one another, tired from days of little to no sleep, pain and emotional distress. Her fingers ran along the wounds on his arms softly as he told her what he had seen. The two noticed that their scents were entirely new. They both now smelled like cold metal after the rain. The storm had passed and all that remained was the beautiful calm of each other wholly together.