Chapter 138

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter or Criminal Minds or any of their characters. I do however own this story, I wrote it and I do NOT give permission for anyone to post it anywhere else. If you want to share it post a link.

A/N: Christmas letter, Harry hasn't yet got the letter from Chapter 137

Thursday 16/12/92

Dear Spencer

Merry Christmas! I hope you have a wonderful day with your mum even if you don't celebrate it in the traditional way. I couldn't get away to bake anything for you this year but if I end up somewhere where I have access to an oven and baking supplies I'll make you something. There's a chocolate cake recipe that Mrs Finnegan gave me over the summer that she makes for Seamus for his birthday because it keeps really well. It is so rich and moist.

I took what you said to heart and you can feel comfortable that this gift did not cost me an unreasonable amount of money. The inks are erasable and the thing that looks like a torch that doesn't work is the eraser, just point the crystal end at the words you want to erase. I was assured that it doesn't take magic to make it work. We use the ink with quills but there is no good reason that you couldn't use them in a fountain pen. I know you prefer to write letters longhand to your mum and that you like nice pens. There's lots of fancy coloured inks but I thought you'd like the purple and if I got you one that looked too fancy like the ink that randomly changes colour or glows in low light it might freak out your mum. The book is one my friend Rose recommended to explain magic to muggle parents and spouses. I know you're not really either and you haven't just found out about the magical world but there were lots of little things in there that I didn't understand or knew but didn't know how to explain to you so it should still be interesting. I sent it early in the hope it will arrive before you leave if you're going home for the holidays.

Nearly everyone has signed up to go home for the Christmas Holidays. The train leaves tomorrow and you cannot know how much I'm looking forward to it. The Weasleys are staying again and so is Hermione because the potion needs to be tended and will be finished over the break. As I said last year, I find it odd that Mrs Weasley doesn't want her children at home for Christmas when she makes such a fuss about family and she's a full time housewife. Then again perhaps Petunia and Vernon would prefer Dudley to stay at school for the holidays too, but are too worried about what people would say if he did and they make a huge fuss over him when he's around. I wish they were going home, not for my sake because I'm glad Ron won't be on the train, I've had a gut full of Ron's friends only when nobody's looking routine. But I think Ginny might be really homesick, she's starting to look too thin and it can't be a lack of good food here. Her brothers don't seem to notice anything's wrong. I don't think that any of them are as close as Mrs Weasley likes to think they are, other than the twins who are almost inseparable and constantly finish each other's sentences as if they don't have individual thoughts.

Ron and Hermione had an awful row with me about putting my name on the list to go home. Not only about the potion but also because they said they were looking forward to us spending Christmas together. They looked genuinely disappointed but I don't know why, I'm looking forward to getting away from both of them. I am going to take your advice and try to disappear in nonmagical London and not come back. If I can get a passport, I might even try to get on the train across the channel into France and see if I can convince somebody to sell me a ticket 'home' to California. I've been trying to practice speaking with an American accent but it's probably rubbish since it's years since I really heard it but at least it doesn't sound British, or at least to me it doesn't. I'm going to ask the goblins if they can make me an American passport and birth certificate in another name. If I can't get a ticket to America I'm going to go to Spain, it will be warmer there and I can practice my Spanish and hopefully will be able to pass the exam to get into Nezcalilizcali Naualotl Tlateotokani Toltekayomeh next year. I would have to repeat two years of magical studies but it would still be worth it to be safe and to never have to see the Dursleys again. I don't know whether I want to go back to Scoil Draiocht if I get away cleanly. It's one place that Dean and Seamus and their parents know I will be. Hopefully I can enrol myself in a regular school in whatever country I end up in so I won't need to.

Seamus still isn't talking to me but I've noticed that he and Dean tend to try to be near me most of the time, and the bullying isn't as bad when people are around. I wonder if it is their status as my vassals that makes them feel they need to do this. If it is it would explain why Seamus seems to be increasingly pissed off with me and the entire rest of the school, if his oath is making him do something he doesn't want to do, and stay close to protect me. I didn't think the oath he made could affect him that way, I really tried to word it to avoid the oath making them feel like they have to protect me since I know my enemies are too powerful for them to help me with. I think that they've spoken to Neville or maybe Neville just noticed what they were doing because he seems to be around more when I'm out of the common room lately as well. It makes Ron's behaviour, avoiding me in public and pretending to be my friend in the dorm even more obviously fake and useless. If I thought he was genuinely my friend I'd be hurt and annoyed but as it is I'm enjoying being around the others without him though I would enjoy it more if I knew they wanted to hang out with me and weren't doing it out of obligation or pity.

I've been trying to spend time in our study room when I know Seamus and Dean won't be there, maybe I should find a new room to study in but on the other hand I am becoming wary of being out in the corridors on my own, or of inconveniencing Dean and Seamus since they feel they need to be with me out there, so I've been spending a lot more time sitting on my bed with the curtains spelled shut and silenced to get away from everyone. On the plus side I finished my Scoil Draioct work for the term a week early and it's all sent off and I'm getting a lot of extra reading on defence done since Professor Idiot is so useless.

Your friend always

Harry

A/N2: Thank you to all those who reviewed followed or favourited this story for your support.

Please stay safe everyone.