Paddy's Pub considered by all who have entered except for the 5 who work at and operates the bar; to be the worst bar in Philadelphia, Pennslyvania. "...It was going to be so great... We were going to great... We were about to show the rest of the world how it's done... All sorts of fair and just laws, systems and stuff..." Mac saying to Dennis Reynolds as one of the 4 co-owners of the bar while Dennis' twin sister Dee was mopping the floor.
"What the hell are you talking about this time?" Dee aske feeling that she wanted to know despite knowing that she will just end up regretting ever asked.
"We were gonna see about establishing Paddy's as one of those micro nations... Us all as kings of the castle... We got a flag put together; an anthem... You were gonna be the ambassador and take the blame for any bad shit that comes out of this..." Mac then explained as Dee glared at them.
"Gee thanks..." Dee said sarcastically as then the door opened and then came in running was Charlie Kelly and the majority owner of the bar Frank Renyolds. Charlie was carrying in his arms a preteen boy with white hair.
"Guys! You are not gonna believe this!" Charlie said running and slipping on the wet floor; ending up dropping the kid on the floor.
"My god..." Dee muttered as they managed to find a pillow and blanket to turn one of the tables into a makeshift bed for the kid as he was groaning from the fall and landing on his head.
"You should feel bad Dee; where was the wet floor sign?" Charlie then said as Dee gave him a glare as they were in front of the table.
"You guys busted it last week and Frank is too stingy to have it replaced!" Dee then retorted.
"Fuck... How did the kid's hair get so white and ugly?" Dennis wondered thinking that it looked like the kid's hair aged its colour already.
"Where did you find the kid?" Mac then asked the two who acted as roommates with all heads turned to them.
"Frank and I were looking through the dumpster besides our apartment building and this kid just appeared through a vortex right out of a movie... Right above the dumpster and landed in it..." Charlie then said with Frank nodding but the others stared at them.
"You have been drinking paint again; haven't you Charlie?" Dennis accused with his arms folded.
"Yeah but it really did happen... Nearly got me to shit myself... Tell them Frank..." Charlie then replied with Frank nodding.
"Really happened as he said... The kid was screaming as he tripped out of it and fell right into the dumpster and then fell out to the ground..." Frank said as they continued staring.
"Yeah... My sister Lisa was showing me and my other sisters a dimensional portal device that she was working on... It was beginning to malfunction and I ended up tripping on my way to get back and slipped through it..." the kid then said as Max, Dennis and Dee shook their heads.
"Well... It's clear that Frank has been tasting paint fumes and the kid must be under something... So if we can find where he lives and drop him off there..." Dennis then said as Dee then slowly came up to the kid.
"Sorry but can you please tell us your name and where you're from?" Dee then asked softly as Lincoln got himself up.
"Lincoln Loud... I'm from Royal Woods, Michigan but in another dimension..." the boy then said as they stared as Dee looked it up on her phone.
"No results... No such place exists..." Dee then said as Dennis then shrugged.
"Let's just drive the kid to like the police station or some other place and let him be the foster system's problem... Or if there is an orphanage we can drop him off since he is clearly delusional or under something..." Dennis then said as Mac then looked at him.
"We could take care of him ourselves..." Mac suggested as Dennis shook his head.
"We already tried this before with the dumpster baby that you found and not again... Not deal with some strange brat..." Dennis then said as Lincoln looked forward.
"Lovely bunch..." Lincoln then muttered to no one in particular as they stared at him and Dennis then motioned as if he just made his point.
"Plus we would have to get him enrolled into school, get him supplies... All that nonsense that's way too much of a hassle..." Frank then said dismissively agreeing with his legal son.
"You know... We could take turns in looking after him... I've heard what happens to unwanted kids in the system and well... We could do some good... Plus we all could use him as a dependant on the taxes and claim money..." Dee then suggested knowing that trying to appeal to better natures will not do a thing to most of them.
Dennis and Frank then began to look interested.
"I could mould him into my image... Teach him the ropes.." Dennis then said as Mac's then had a thought.
"I just realised... This could be the missing element to our group dynamic... Me as the brains, Dennis as the looks, Frank as the muscle, Charlie the wild card, Dee the useless chick... Lincoln can be the kid that hangs around us to look cute and make us more appealing to a wider demographic..." Mac then suggested as Dennis looked at him.
"Didn't Cousin Oliver kill the Brady Bunch and who ever liked Wesley in Star Trek?" Dennis asked as Mac then came closer.
"Wesley was a fluke and Cousin Oliver was just the show's way of trying to recreate the earlier antics and dynamic when the kids were too old to be cute..." Mac then said as Dee then looked at Lincoln trying to act motherly.
"What do you say? Want to find a home with us?" Dee asked as Lincoln frowned for a second before nodding.
"Not much a choice..." Lincoln said thinking that he could have a place to stay with them until Lisa fixes the machine and comes back for him.
Besides how bad could they be?
Plus how long would it take for Lisa the super genius to come back for him?
10 YEARS LATER
The now 22 year old Lincoln Reynolds-McDonald-Kelly with his clean shaven face, orange jacket and his favourite Thunder Gun Express shirt was being shown through the bar door with his eyes blinded by Charlie and Frank. "Seriously... What is going on guys... I know you said it was a surprise but when it comes to surprises and the gang and this bar... The track record can say for itself is all that I'm saying..." Lincoln said as the blindfold forced off his eyes and found a banner hanging up saying 'HAPPY ADOPTION DAY LINKOLN!'
There were Mac, Dennis and Dee yelling out surprise along with Cricket and the waitress. The waitress gave a polite clap and so did the lawyer who clearly looked like he would rather be anywhere else. There was a chocolate cake that looked like it was bought on the cheap in the for sale part of the supermarket.
"Woah... What is this..." Lincoln asked surprised.
"Today marks the 10th anniversary of when Charlie and Frank fished you out of the dumpster and brought you here... And for better or for worse... You became a special part of the gang... Helped us through the tough times and the worse times... Even as outgrew your role as the cute kid like the kid from Two and a Half Men... Still; you're part of the gang..." Mac then said patting Lincoln on the back.
"I remember that day like it was yesterday... Mac and I were talking about our plans of turning Paddy's into a micro nation being squashed by the city government... Shame; I already had plans of inviting women to the bar and pointing out that they are on foreign soil without any protections and as a world leader in his kingdom; if they don't do what I say or break the laws as dictated... Well I wouldn't do anything but the implication..." Dennis then said as he got stares at this and was then punched in the arm by Dee.
"No need for you to be your awful self now of all times Dennis... Let's give it up to the man of the hour..." Dee then said as there were clapping as Lincoln then smiled.
The gang were all terrible in their own way but they were all he had since he had somehow gotten to Philly; he couldn't remember a whole lot about his old family but the basics of his sisters and parents. He was probably dismembering a lot of stuff as just crazy to cope with being lost in a new city.
"And to celebrate... A night of drinking for you right here at the bar!" Charlie then said as the gang then cheered Lincoln on and he went and got the nearest bottle pushed his way by Dee.
Only about 2 years ago did I finally really give this show a chance on Netflix and I regret not having done so before and it probably has become my favourite live action sitcom ever. Consider this first part of this chapter taking place between the 4th and 5th season and we will see how Lincoln turned out after growing up in the environment more out of control and unpredictable than in the Loud House. Where duck, dodge, push and shove is definitely how they don't show their love if there is any there that is. I am welcome to any ideas you might have for this.