Blaine can't help himself as he looks over to Kurt during class a few too many times. He can't wait for class to be over so they can talk. This time Kurt won't run away. Blaine will do anything to help Kurt feel comfortable and open up because this time Blaine can't ignore what happened.
Once class is over everyone packs their stuff and leaves for the weekend. Kurt stays behind and packs his stuff slowly until everyone else left and he and Blaine are alone. "I thought today we do one run through and then we go to the grocery store to buy something for dinner. You can decide what we cook. At my place we cook together and have a nice evening together. How does that sound?" Blaine proposes. "Sure" Kurt agrees with a little smile.
Like said after Kurt sang the song once they talk about it for a few minutes before taking their stuff to go to Blaines car. For dinner Kurt chooses spaghetti carbonara since it's pretty simple and doesn't take too long.
Arriving at Blaines apartment they start cooking immediatly since it's been a long day and both are hungry already. While the spaghetti cook the couple sets the table together and shortly after they can sit down and eat. They don't talk much while eating and instead just listen to the music playing in the back.
When they both are done eating Blaine decides to let the dishes be for now and guides Kurt to the couch. He wants nothing more than just cuddle with Kurt the whole evening but he knows that there's still something he and Kurt need to talk about. The elephant in the room.
"Do you want to tell me what happened on Wednesday? And yesterday?" Blaine asks. "You won't believe me when I try to tell you that I've been sick for real right?" the younger man asks back and sees how his boyfriend shakes his head "Normally yes but not after you ran away the day before. You said you're fine and I didn't believe you but I wanted to talk to you in person".
"Okay it's that obvious" Kurt sighs and looks up, head against the pillow in defeat. "After being that reluctant with holding hands, the cheek kiss and the running away yes. A little. I wanted to give you the chance to tell me by yourself but after Wednesday I'm worried. You stayed home yesterday and I got even more worried. Yes my fans crossed a line but you must've had a reason for running away and I just want to know why so I can support you" Blaine explains.
The chestnut haired man nods. Blaines worry is reasonable and he should really talk to him. Like his dad said. He needs to talk to Blaine about it if he wants to make their relationship work. "I needed a day off yesterday to sort my thoughts. I talked to my dad and that helped. He, Santana and Rachel went through everything with me" he finally says.
"Tell me as much as you like and feel comfortable in sharing. I will listen to you until you're done. Do you need anything?" Blaine asks before the pther man starts with telling. "Tissues? And you" the younger says quietly. Quickly Blaine gets some tissues before down next to Kurt again. He takes his boyfriends hand and smiles encouragingly at him.
Kurt takes a deep breath before he starts telling "I want you to know everything. No secrets. My mom died when I was ten. She was the first person I told that I'm gay. I think based on the way I talked about boys different than girls she kinda suspected it. She had cancer and I knew it looked bad for her but when she was gone it was really hard for me. My dad and I grew closer and I came out to him but knowing that Lima isn't the most friendly place for people like you and me we agreed that I would only tell people when I feel comfortable around them.
But I'm me. I don't look like every boy and I don't sound like every boy. I don't dress like every boy and I prefer fashion and the arts over sport. Middle school wasn't great but Rachel was always there for me when I felt like I need a friend. Especially when my mom died. But high school was a horrible place. I got bullied. Badly. Glee club was my happy place and Rachel and I were going through everything together. She was the only friend who knew that I'm gay.
When Santana told the glee club that she's a lesbian I told her too. We became close very quickly. She's a badass so no one, homophobe or not, dared to say anything when she came out to the rest of the school and she and her ex were holding hands. They broke up halfway through senior year and she decided to come to New York with Rachel and me.
I used my fashion book as a diary sometimes. When I had a design idea I put it in there, when I needed to rant or missed my mom I wrote it down there too. One day Rachel spend the afternoon with her now ex boyfriend and Santana was sick so after school I went to my locker to get my stuff before going home too.
The jocks that always bullied me cornered me and one of them shoved me against the locker. My fashion book fell down and they picked it up before I could. They read it, laughed about it and took pictures of it before throwing it away. I waited until they were gone before I picked it out of the trash again.
The next day the whole school and connections outside of school knew that I'm gay. I got outed before I was ready and the bullying only got worse from then. Santana tried to protect me as much as she could but it was too much. I felt like wherever I went people were looking at me and think "Hey that's the fag who just got outed".
I stayed at home a whole day because I couldn't bear leaving the house. I talked to my dad who said it's okay for one day and that we'll go through this together. I wrote a lot in my fashion book but I never dared to take it to school with me again.
They started to put pictures they took all over the school, revealing pretty much my whole privacy. About how I'm afraid to come out, my rants about the bullies that made me look like a bully myself and eventually the pages where I wrote about or to my mom. How much I hate cancer for taking her and how I love my dad but still think that my mom was the world to me.
Someone somehow managed to tell my dad. He wasn't mad. He understood because my mom meant just as much to him but I think back then he still was a little hurt. In school some people laughed at how sensitive I am and that I still grief about her even tho I knew she would die and it's already been a few years. They said she's probably glad that she doesn't have to live with a fag.
Eventually it got so bad that I didn't go to school for a week. I lost my appetite and spend day and night in my room, crying and wishing that I never took the book to school with me in first place. My dad was worried so he always tried to keep an eye on me. He and Mr. Sche, our glee teacher, talked to the principal multiple times. It got a little better but the bullying never stopped.
When I went back to school Rachel, Santana and our friends from glee tried to keep me save and an eye on me as well. They were just as worried as my dad. They thought I might do something to myself. Not many people know. Not even Rachel or my dad. Only Santana and now you, but I would lie if I say that I haven't thought about hurting myself or what it would be like if I just leave it all behind me and be with my mom again. Don't worry I didn't do anything. Just thought about it.
Then, a few months back at school I stayed behind after gym class because I always waited until the jocks are gone before I shower and change. I just finished changing when a jock, Dave Korofski, came in again. He was one of the boys who outed me and as it turned out he was still in the closet. He didn't plan to come out and outed me for his own protection and after seeing how everybody started treating me he didn't plan to ever come out.
Anyway, he came in and threatened me with my life if I would tell anyone. Then he forced me into a kiss. Luckily Santana was waiting for me and heard my fist banging against the locker when he did. She came in and pulled him away. That girl really has super power and I think if she wouldn't have been there he would've done more than the kiss. He ended up getting expelled after we told the principal what happened the day after. But the day it happened I told Santana that I'll be okay and went home. My father was at a friends house, watching a game, so I was alone at home. I felt unsafe and the silence overwhelmed me.
I couldn't trust myself to be alone because in that moment I really wanted to do something to myself. I ran over to Santanas and told her that I'm not okay. She was there for me the whole time and I texted my dad that I'll sleep at her place. I cried the whole night and she was just there for me. Everytime I was alone at home I'd sleep at her place or maybe at Rachels but only Santana knew why. She and Rachel helped me push through the last one and a half years before Rachel and I, and in the end also Santana, moved to New York.
I feel a lot more comfortable since I'm here and way more confident. At first I was scared to visit my dad in Lima so he often came here but a lot of the bullies moved now so it's not that bad to visit him anymore. But all these memories and some people are still there so I still don't like visiting him much. But yeah since this high school horror I'm not doing well with confrontation like from your fans and feel unsure about couple stuff as simple as holding hands in public. I'm trying to do better when I'm with you and I already do a tiny bit and I want to do better. I want to do all that couple stuff with you but my body just reacts. I guess that explains my behaviour".
It's quiet for a moment when Kurt finishes because not only he is crying but Blaine is too. Quiet sniffs from Blaine mix with Kurts heartbreaking sobs. The whole time Blaine didn't let go of his boyfriends hand and only now he lets go to spread his arms "C'mere" so Kurt can collaps in them. In Blaines arms he continues sobbing, louder in the safe embrace of his boyfriend.
"I'm so glad that you're still here after what you had to go through sweetheart" Blaine whispers and for a moment Kurt smiles "You have a pet name for me?". "Of course. I just didn't knew if it would make you feel uncomfortable so I wanted to wait for the right moment" Blaine admits and smiles when Kurt answers "You're cute honey". For a short moment the pain is forgotten as both smile at each other and the pet names.
"Okay seriously. You said you're trying to get better and I want to support you but as soon as you feel uncomfortable from now on you say stop and talk to me. No running away, no I'm okay or I'm fine. No covering up anymore" Blaine says "What happened was horrible and there's no way to change the past but we will make the best of everything in the future. You and me". "I'd like that" Kurt nods with a smile.
Quickly Blaine dries his tears with the back of his hand before he wipes Kurts away with his thumbs. "Now I think I still have some ice cream in the freezer and chocolate sauce as a topping. Wanna have a deep talk dessert?" the older man asks and Kurt nods, sitting up again so Blaine can stand up "That sounds amazing".
"Hey Blaine?" Kurt asks when the curly haired man comes back with two bowls of ice cream. "Yes?" the man asks back as he sits down. "You said you came out in high school too. How was it for you? I mean Westerville isn't much better than Lima but Dalton has a zero bullying policy or something right?" Kurt asks curious.
The other man sighs "Yes they have but I didn't went to Dalton my whole high school time. I went to a public school before but believe me you don't want to know how that went". "Yes I do. If you're okay with telling me of course" Kurt says and this time he's the one who takes Blaines hand as a sign of comfort and support.
"I came out in my first year of high school because I didn't want to always worry that I might give it a way with my very obvious crush on Zac Efron or something. I got bullied through my first year of high school. It started with name calling but the teachers always looked away so it got worse with the days passing.
At the end of the year there was a prom and since I couldn't find any friends I went by myself. I thought it might be fun to just listen to some music and dance along or something. But I felt lonely so I texted my mom, asking if she could pick me up early and went outside to wait for her.
Three boys from the class above me came after me and beat the crap out of me for being gay, a fag like they said. My mother found me just a few moments later and called an ambulance. I had some more and some less severe injuries. During the summer I got back on my feet again and my parents transfered me to Dalton so I go to school somewhere save" Blaine tells.
He's okay to talk about what happened because in the end it all went well. "The guys got caught and I felt welcomed at Dalton. I got into the glee club and found my passion and friends. At first it was still hard for me to think back to what happened but they helped me feel comfortable and when I opened up to them about what happened they supported me to deal with the days I wasn't feeling well" he says with a smile. Kurt returns that smile "I'm glad that it all ended so well for you".
"it ended well for both of us when I think about what happened and how we sit here on the couch together now, being happy to have each other" Blaine says. It's true. They are happy to have each other. They are glad to sit on Blaines couch and eat ice cream. Sure some days are better and some worse but right now it's okay. That's why they spend the rest of the evening with cuddling and watching Gilmore Girls until Kurt says goodbye and goes home where he texts Blaine that he arrived.