This chapter has been requested by a few people. A parody of the episode: Squid's Day Off
It's Springtime. A time for fun and frolic for most. But not for poor Lori. She's working at Gus' Games n Grub with Leni. She is now staring out the window, desperately wanting to get out of work.
Lori sighs. "What a beautiful day, and here I am trapped in a prison of high cholesterol."
Ding!
"No one ever comes in on a Sunday."
Ding!
"Why can't the manager just let us out?"
Ding!
Lori grew annoyed from the constant dings. Leni is at the order counter ringing the bell. Lori comes over.
"Leni, stop ringing this bell!" She took it.
"I was just testing it."
"I will ring the bell when there's a order! But there's no customers! There literally hasn't been one all day and there literally isn't going to be any!"
Lori picks up the cash register and slams it on the counter in anger. It makes a ding sound.
"One pizza coming up!" Leni said, thinking Lori rang the bell.
"No!" The cash register opened and hit Lori. Some coins came out and landed on the floor. The manager heard this from inside his office.
"That sounds like my money dropping." He came out. Lori was gathering the coins. "What's going on out here? (gasps) My babies!"
He pushes Lori away. "Get away you animal! What have you done? Nice clean money soiled! I'll take care of you." He collects the money. "Let Papa clean you up. Out of the way!"
The manager went into the kitchen. He started washing the coins in the sink. "It's ok. Don't cry little ones."
Leni came over and tapped his shoulder. "What's wrong sir?"
He got startled. One of his dimes rolled near the drain. "My dime!"
It stopped. "Phew."
But then it rolled in. "No!" He reaches for the dime and was able to grab it. "Gotcha!"
But his arm was stuck in the sink. He tried to get it out. "What the-? It's stuck! You've gotta help me Leni!"
"You've gotta let go of the dime." Leni said.
"I can think of ten good reasons to never let go of a dime. There's got to be another way. Grab onto my back and heave!"
Leni held onto her boss and pulled as hard as she could. She managed to pull his arm out but he flew back and bumped into a wall, which caused the shelf above him to tilt. All the stuff on the shelf fell onto his head, including a radio, a box, and a bunch of bricks. He got a bump his head. Then his dime fell on his bump and he passed out.
An ambulance had arrived at Gus' Games n Grub. Two paramedics were carrying the manager on a stretcher.
"Wait. Lori, I'm putting you in charge of things around here while I'm gone."
Lori smiled. The paramedics carried the manager to the ambulance.
"You can count on me sir." Lori said. "Take care. Hurry back. Get well soon. You're in our thoughts. Takes more muscles to frown than to smile."
The ambulance left. Lori turned to Leni. "Ok Leni, let's get down to business. My first official act as new manager is to give you a promotion."
"Really?" Leni said excitedly.
"You get to run the cash register."
"The cashier register? That's totes awesome! Lori, who's gonna making the food?"
"You are. It's part of the promotion I mentioned earlier. You'll be wearing two hats know. You're gonna take the orders than you're gonna make the orders."
Lori puts her hat over Leni's hat.
"Wow. This is the best day of my life." Leni said.
"Me too."
"But wait, if I'm running the register and making the pizzas, what are you gonna do?"
"I've got some very important boss like errands to run. See ya later."
Lori began to leave.
"Lori!" Leni called.
"What is it?"
"You forgot to teach me how to use the cash register."
"You press the button and put the money inside." Lori instructed. "Ok, you're on your own."
Lori leaves. Leni stands by the register. "I can't believe this is really happening. Today I start living!"
Lori was walking off. "Well Lori, you've really outdone yourself this time. A beautiful day of relaxing and pampering with pay. I know. I'll go to the mall. But I guess I do feel bad for poor Leni, all by herself. Oh, it'll pass. She's probably standing by the register with that stupid grin on her face."
Lori imagines Leni standing by the register with her stupid grin. Chaz comes by and he also has a stupid face.
"Hey Leni." Chaz said stupidly.
"Hey Chaz." Leni greeted stupidly.
"Hey Leni, could you give me change for a quarter?"
"No problem." Leni takes his quarter. She bangs on the register and it opens. She takes out a bunch of dollars. "Here you go."
"Thanks."
Lori snaps out of imagination. "I forgot to tell her how to make change!"
She runs back to the pizzeria. "Leni!"
Leni is standing by the register. Lori goes to check inside the register. Everything looks in order.
"Phew."
"Hey Lori, you done with those errands?"
"No, I'm not. I just remembered…" she takes out a dollar. "-I needed change for this dollar."
"Do you want... four quarters? Or ten dimes? Or twenty nickels? Or one hundred pennies? Or one quarter, three dimes, seven nickels, and ten pennies? Or if you give a five dollar bill, your options are-"
"Alright!" Lori interrupted. "Goodbye."
She leaves with her dollar.
At the mall, Lori is relaxing in a vibrating massage chair. "Ah, these vibrating massage chairs are literally amazing. I'm the boss, I deserve this."
Everything's gonna be fine. There won't be any customers today anyway. She'll probably just stand there bored. Ha. Leni, bored.
Lori imagines Leni at the register. She yawns.
"Getting kinda bored." Leni falls asleep on the counter. Suddenly the restaurant sets on fire. Lori blows that thought out of her mind. She runs out of the mall and rushes back to Gus' place but then stops.
"Oh, what am I doing? I'm wasting valuable relaxation time, that's what I'm doing."
She heads back to the mall. "I mean, what are the odds? Leni setting Gus' place on fire."
Then a fire truck is seen going in the other direction. Lori panics and runs to back to the arcade/pizzeria. She comes in with a fire extinguisher and sprays foam all over. It clears up and Lori and Leni both have foam like mustaches.
"Can I help you sir?"
Lori whips the foam off. "It's me you twit!"
"Oh hi Lori." The foam falls off her face. "How are those errands going?"
"What's that supposed to mean? I'm very busy."
"I'm sure you are."
"I don't like your tone."
Leni changed her tone into a deeper one. "I'm sure you are." Regular tone. "How's that?"
"Just do your jobs." Lori leaves.
"You got it Lori. Gee, no wonder the manager put her in charge."
Back at the mall, Lori was trying to enjoy her day off. She was at a clothing section trying on sunglasses.
"Ok Lori, just enjoy your day off." She tried on another pair of sunglasses and looks in the mirror. "These are nice. They look just like...Leni's. Speaking of Leni, I wonder how she's doing. No, don't worry about her. Now repeat after me, you won't go back to Gus' Games n Grub."
In the mirror, Lori's face was replaced with Leni's.
"I will destroy Gus' Games n Grub."
Lori panicked and threw the mirror. It broke into pieces.
"Hey! You gonna pay for that?" A store employee said.
After Lori paid for the damage, she ran back to Gus' place.
"Leni!"
"Have you finished-"
"No!"
Lori headed back to the mall. "That's it! No matter what sick fantasies run through my mind I will not go back to that pizzeria!"
However, Lori ran back to the pizzeria again.
"Have you finished those errands?" Leni asked.
Lori ran back to the mall. But then ran back to the pizzeria. She keep doing this over and over as Leni kept asking her if she finished doing her errands. Lori then came back to the pizzeria for what seemed like the one hundredth time.
"Have you finished with those errands?" Leni asked three times.
"No! I am not finished with those errands and I never will be so quit checking up on me!" Lori snapped. "I know what you're up to. Forcing me to come back here every time you mess up!"
"But I haven't."
"Ok, maybe you haven't yet. But you will, you will! And when you do I'll be there! I'll be there!"
Lori laughs crazily and leaves.
"Boy, Lori sure is a hard worker. She makes me proud to wear two hats."
Lori was back at the mall. This time she took drastic measures. She used a ball and chain. She tied the chain around her leg to prevent her from leaving the mall.
"There. Now I'll have to stay here." Lori said. She had a crazy look on her face and her hair was messy. "I'm not even gonna think about you know who at the you know what doing I don't care. Just gonna relax."
Lori was now in the spa wearing her bikini. She sat in the pool.
"Let Lori's day off begin." Lori began to relax but then heard Leni's laughter.
"What was that?" She heard more laughing. "It's Leni. She's spying on me to see if I really am doing those errands. But she left her post and I finally caught her messing up."
She smiles smugly and got out of the pool. "Aha! Now I've caught-" She stepped on a doll. She saw it and it made a laughing sound. The laugh was similar to Leni's. Then Lori noticed someone covered in a sheet. The feet were exposed and the person was wearing sandals. Lori figured it must be Leni.
"Gee, I sure wish Leni was at the mall shopping with me." Lori said sarcastically. Then Lori pulled off the sheet. "Aha! Wait til the manager finds out you're-"
"-a mannequin." The person was a female mannequin that looked like Leni but was wearing a different dress. Lori went back into the pool. "You're literally losing it Lori, calm down. If I let this get to me again, I'll just end up running down to Gus' place bursting through the front door up to that blonde haired pest Leni and she'll say-"
"Hi Lori, are you finished with those errands yet?" Leni appeared right next to Lori wearing her work uniform.
"Aha!"
Leni went underwater and Lori dived in after her.
"I know you're in here." Lori saw her sister going down the drain. She rose up from the pool. "She's headed back to Gus' Games n Grub! I'll beat her there!"
Lori ran out of the spa and the chain and ball didn't restrict her, as the chain broke off. Lori ran out of the mall still in her bikini.
"I've got you now Leni!"
"Hey! Put some clothes on!" A lady said.
Lori ran past Chaz. "The truth will be revealed!"
"Woohoo! Right on Lori!"
At the hospital, a doctor is escorting Lori's manager outside.
"Ok sir, get plenty of rest and if things don't seem right just come back." The doctor went back inside.
"Thanks doc."
Just then, Lori ran right past the manager. "Leni, you can't beat me!"
The manager frowned and went back inside the hospital. Lori ran inside the arcade/pizzeria.
"Aha! I caught you now!" She went up to the counter with that crazy look on her face. "You didn't think I knew you were a mannequin doll at the mall! You followed me there and then you were in the pool! And then I...and then you...and I...and you...swam down the drain...and beat me to...Gus' Games n Grub."
Leni looked concerned. "Uh, does that mean you-"
"Yes Leni. I am finished with those errands." Lori hugs the register. "I guess I wanna take my place back at the cash register. I really do."
"Ok...by the way, why are you in your swimsuit?"
"Well, I, Uh-"
"Wait, don't tell me. You went to the mall to relax at the spa pool."
Lori looked surprised.
"What? I may be an airhead but I know you well enough Lori."
Lori smiles nervously.
"Hey, you know what?" Leni goes to the front doors and comes back with the sign. "We forgot to switch the closed sign to open. It's like we could've taken the whole day off!"
Leni laughs. Lori just faints.