Guest request. A parody based on the episode: Pickles
At Aloha Comrade, Mr. Grouse had been hired as a waiter since he needed extra cash. Lynn Sr. had given him instructions on what to do. Mr. Grouse now had on a work uniform.
"It's nice to have you on board here, Mr. Grouse." Lynn Sr. said.
"Well Loud, I hope this job is worth it."
"Oh, it is. Employees get free food made by yours truly."
"I like the sound of that."
"Ok, you know what to do now. I'll be in the kitchen."
Lynn Sr. went into the kitchen. A customer showed up.
"Welcome to Aloha Comrade." Mr. Grouse greeted. "May I take your order?"
The guy looked at the menu. "I'll have a-"
Mr. Grouse took out a notepad and pencil.
"No. Oh, maybe...no. Hmm...I'll have..no. Or maybe-"
"Are you planning on ordering today, sir?" Mr. Grouse asked slightly irritated.
"I'll have a BLT sandwich."
"BLT, got it." Mr. Grouse wrote the order.
"With extra bacon."
"Daring today, aren't we?" Mr. Grouse went back to give Lynn Sr. the order. "One BLT, extra bacon."
"One cryin' Lily, coming up!" Lynn Sr. gets out the ingredients. He cracks his fingers. "First bread, then bacon, extra bacon, followed by ranch, mayo, lettuce, tomatoes, and bread in that order."
He went back to Mr. Grouse. "One cryin' Lily, uuuup!"
"Whatever." Mr. Grouse took the food and served it to the customer. Another customer ordered and Mr. Grouse told Lynn Sr. "Twelve BLTs on wheat breads."
Lynn. Sr. rapidly made the sandwiches and put them all on one big plate. "One dozen cryin' pigs on the farm! Uuuup!"
"Thanks Farmer Loud." Mr. Grouse took the order back to the customer. "It's been a thrill serving you."
"Can I get extra salt?" The guy asked.
"We're all out." Mr. Grouse informed.
"Could you check?"
"...No."
The customer glared at him and walked off with the sandwiches. Then a large overweight man came up to order. He was wearing glasses and wore a tank top that was small on him so his belly was exposed. He also wore shorts and sandals.
"Let me guess shorty, a small salad?" Mr. Grouse jokes.
The man told his order as Mr. Grouse wrote it down. "I'll take a double triple bossy deluxe on a raft, four by four animal style, extra shingles with the shimmy, and a squeeze, light axle grease, make it cry, burn it and let it swim."
Mr. Grouse didn't write down the whole order. "We sir food here sir."
Lynn Sr. came out with a BLT. "Hey Grouse, did we get another order for-" He sees the customer and gasps. He glared. "Big Bert."
Big Bert glared at Lynn Sr. "Lynn Loud."
Mr. Grouse moves out of the way.
"I hear you make a mean BLT." Big Bert said.
"Yep." Lynn Sr. replied. "And I hear you're kinda picky."
"Yep."
"Well then-" Lynn Sr's tone went happy. "Here you go!"
He handed the BLT to Big Bert. Bert took it and went to sit down at a table. Others stared at him as he inspected the sandwich. He then took a bite. Lynn Sr. came.
"So Big Bert, what do you think?"
"This is pretty good." He admitted. "Only one thing, you forgot the tomatoes."
Everyone gasps.
"No!" Lynn Sr. cried.
"The best there is? I don't think so! You lose!" Bert laughed weirdly.
"But the tomatoes should be right where they always are." Lynn Sr. checked the sandwich. "I know I put them on. Where are those tomatoes? Tomatoes! Tomatoes!"
Big Bert walked up to Sergei. "I believe you owe me two bucks."
"Two bucks?!"
"Your guarantee." Big Bert pointed to the menu, which had the words "money back guarantee" on the bottom, but you could barely see them since the font was so tiny. Sergei squinted.
"Oh, that. Well, can't we talk about this?" He took out the money.
"No." Bert pulled on his money but Sergei didn't let go.
"How about a discount on restroom tokens?"
"Afraid not."
Bert started to leave as Sergei was being dragged on the floor.
"How about a free glass of water? A dozen free glasses of water? With ice!"
Bert took his cash and left.
"No! Come back!" Sergei cried. "Two dollars! Two dollars! No!"
"Sergei, I know I put tomatoes on that sandwich." Lynn Sr. said, still looking for them.
"Those two bucks are coming out of your paycheck!" Sergei dragged Lynn Sr. back into the kitchen.
"Wait! Wait! Wait!"
Lynn Sr. was tossed in the kitchen.
"Get back to work! We've got orders waiting!"
Then Mr. Grouse showed up. "I need Another BLT. Wow Loud, those things are popular." He left.
Lynn Sr. went back to a table to make another sandwich. "Ok, I'm not gonna blow it this time. Let's see, bread, then ranch and then..tomatoes? No, that's not right!" He started over. "Bread, then mayo and ranch, lettuce, then the tomatoes? No."
He tried again. "Bread, mayo, then bread. No, I forget the bacon! Tomatoes, ranch!"
Lynn Sr. was now making a mess.
"No! Think! Think! I'm losing it! Bread, shoe, mayo, pan, bread! No!"
Sergei came in.
"Sergei, I'm so confused! I can't remember how to do anything!"
"Why don't you take the rest of the day off?"
"But who'll make the food?"
"Don't worry, we've got Mr. Grouse."
"Huh? What was that?" Mr. Grouse said from outside.
Lynn Sr. came out. "Sergei is right. I need to get my head straight. Now was it bread, bacon, ranch-(gasps) Where's the door? Sergei! The front door is missing!"
Sergei was seen by the front door.
"Oh." He laughs nervously. "Sorry about that Sergei. This tomatoes thing has got my head all messed up. I better go home and rest my brain."
He leaves but then comes back. "Um, which way do I live?"
Sergei points to a direction.
"Right, of course."
Back at home in the living room, Lynn Sr. was still trying to figure out how to make a BLT. He wrote the ingredients on paper. "No, no! Was it bread, bacon, bread or tomato, ranch, bread? No! Bread! No! Shoe! No!" He throws the pad of paper and pencil in frustration. He has used up a bunch of paper that were now scattered on the table. "I am so confused!"
Rita comes in carrying Lily. "Honey, are you still trying to figure out how to make that sandwich?"
"Yes! I can't believe I forgot how to make a Cryin Lily."
"Poo poo?" Lily asked.
"No, not you Lily. I was referring to a BLT. This is stressing me out." He sighs.
"Maybe a goods night sleep will help you get your head on straight." Rita suggested.
"I guess you're right."
Lynn Sr. had put on his pajamas and got ready for bed. "Now How do I sleep on a bed again? Was it mattress, sheets, and then Lynn?"
"I got it! It was Lynn, mattress, sheets, and then pillow." He go under the mattress. Rita was watching this. "Goodnight honey."
"Uh Lynn?"
"No, this isn't right."
He laid on the sheets.
"Lynn-"
"Wait, don't tell me! I can figure this out." Lynn Sr. continued to switch places throughout the night. Rita just went into the living room to sleep on the couch. It was eventually the next day. His alarm clock started beeping. The father was under the bed. "Aw, I almost had it!"
He came out to turn off his clock. "How do I turn this thing off? Think, think, think! Aha!" He grabbed a hammer and used it to smash the alarm clock, breaking it. "Great thinking Lynn."
At Aloha Comrade, there was smoke coming from the kitchen. Mr. Grouse used a fire extinguisher to blow it away. Sergei came in.
"The BLT's are done." Mr. Grouse informed him.
Sergei saw the sandwiches were burnt and blackened. Outside, customers were not happy.
"He burnt my sandwich." One guy said.
"He burnt my burrito." One women said.
"He burnt my drink." One kid said.
The angry customers left.
"No! Come back!" Sergei called. "No! No! That's it! I gotta get Lynn back!"
Sergei went over to the Loud house. He saw a toaster hanging from the front door. He opened the door. "Lynn?"
Inside, he saw the living room was a mess. The couch was knocked over, there were steaks on the tv, eggs splattered onto the walls with darts stuck to them, and other things were out of place.
"Uh, Lynn?"
Lynn showed up wearing underwear on his head. "Sergei, hello. How do you how do?"
"Why're you talking funny?" Sergei removed the underwear from his head.
"I anything can't do right since because tomatoes."
"Nonsense. You'll be back to your old self making sandwiches again in no time."
"I don't think ready back to go to work Sergei." Lynn Sr. walked off.
"But you're fine Comrade."
Lynn Sr. bumped into a wall, then went into the kitchen.
"Or maybe not."
Rita showed up. "Hello sir, as you can see my husband has lost his confidence."
"Don't worry ma'am, I'll help him."
"Glad to hear that, cause I can't take another minute of this." Rita left the house.
Lynn Sr. was in the kitchen pouring juice and cereal into a pot. His boss came in.
"Lynn, all we have to do is get your confidence back so you can make me more money, and bring in customers."
"I how do that?" Lynn Sr. asked.
"It's like riding a bike. You never forget." Sergei saw a bike in a pot that was on the stove. "Uh...I'm gonna help you."
The two men were sitting on the couch in the living room, where things were back in place.
"If you learn how to make a BLT again, your life will be back in order." Sergei explained. He opened a mat filled with BLT ingredients and laid it on the table.
"Sergei, I don't think-"
"Take your time."
Lynn Sr. looked at the ingredients. Later that day, it was nighttime. Then daytime again. Lynn still hadn't made the sandwich. He picked up bread and Sergei stared at him with hope, but then changed his mind. Two days passed by. It was night again. Sergei had fallen asleep.
"I've got it!" Lynn Sr. said, waking him up. "It's all clear to me now!"
"It is?"
"Yes! I finally realized that I can't do it! I can't do it Sergei! I'm a failure!"
"Don't talk like that!"
"Don't you get it, you fat Russian!" Lynn Sr. snapped. "I can't make a double BLT with the works! I can't make BLT with bread, bacon, lettuce, mayo, ranch, tomatoes, and top bread in that order!"
He then realized he just did.
Sergei smiled. "It's time."
Lynn Sr. and Sergei head back to Aloha Comrade. Lynn Sr. goes into the kitchen and pushes Mr. Grouse out, who is burned. Then Lynn Sr. gets a fire extinguisher and sprays foam on the old man. One customer saw Lynn Sr.
"Hey! Mr. Loud is back!" Other people heard him and became happy to see the old chef. They went inside the restaurant. Lynn Sr. looked at himself in his spatula and smiled. Then Big Bert came and pushed through the customers.
"I hear Lynn is back!"
"I'm right here Big Bert."
"I thought I ran you outta town!" Big Bert spits.
"This is where I belong." Lynn Sr. twirled his spatula around.
Bert roared at him.
"Roar." Lynn Sr. replied.
The crowd gasped. Now the tension was real. Big Bert got out a fork and knife. Lynn held out his spatula. The two men glared at each other as the people stared. Sergei sweated. Mr. Grouse was looking at himself in the mirror but then looked at the scene in front of him.
"Give me the regular." Big Bert ordered. "And this time don't forget the tomatoes."
Lynn Sr. zipped back into the kitchen and out with a BLT in a second. "I didn't."
Big Bert took his sandwich and took a bite. Sergei sweated. Mr. Grouse looked in the mirror again but then looked back at the scene frowning. Lynn Sr. smiled confidently.
"Still no pickles."
Lynn Sr. looked surprised.
"See?" Big Bert opened his mouth wide and showed the chewed up bacon on his tongue, much to everyone's disgust.
"You failed again, Lynn the loser." Big Bert did his weird laugh again, but this time Lynn Sr. noticed something.
"Wait a minute." He grabbed Big Bert's tongue to reveal four tomatoes under it. "Look! He's been hiding the tomatoes under his tongue the whole time!"
"And there's the tomatoes from last time too!" Sergei mentioned.
"And there's my car keys!" One women said.
Everyone glared at Big Bert angrily. Bert gulped. "And..there's my ride."
He ran out of the restaurant. Sergei, Lynn Sr., and Mr. Grouse stood in front of the customers.
"Three cheers for the return of our master head chef, Lynn Loud." Sergei announced. "Hip hip!"
"Hooray!" The crowd cheered. Even Mr. Grouse cheered but not as cheerfully.
"Hip hip!"
"Hooray!"
"Hip hip!"
"Hooray!"
"And three cheers for the chef who took my place while I was gone." Lynn Sr announced. "Mr. Grouse. Hip hip!"
"Boo!"
"Hip hip!"
"Boo!"
Mr. Grouse frowned.
"Hip hip!"
"Boo!"
"Hip hip!"
"BOO! YOU STINK!"