A/N: This one's a little back and forth! But I'm excited for what's coming next!

She felt heavy. Her whole body ached, as if she had the flu, and even though she had to get up, she couldn't muster the energy to pull herself out of bed. She'd been laying under the covers for about half an hour, listening as Will moved around the room, trying to find the energy to start her day. But even so, she knew it was futile. The ache, the heaviness in her body… it was sadness. Pain, grief, misery… suddenly, without warning, it was all there again.

"Hey, you've gotta be at trainin' in half an hour," came Will's voice from behind her as the bathroom door opened. JJ ignored him, burrowing further under the covers as she willed herself to go back to sleep. The bed dipped behind her, telling her that Will had sat down. "Come on Jayje… you should probably get up"

"I can't," she mumbled, her voice muffled by the covers. "Just leave me alone"

"Jayje-"

"Leave me alone," she said again, this time, much firmer than before. Tears burned her eyes, making her turn her face closer to the pillow.

Why did it have to come back in such brutal waves? She had been doing so well. They had been doing so well. And yet, like a ton of bricks, the depression was back, crowding her mind and heart, hurting her body, pulling her away from the happiness she'd only recently pulled back.

"What's goin' on?" Will asked gently, bringing a hand to her shoulder.

"I just want to be alone," JJ replied, her voice shaking with impending tears as she pulled herself away from his touch. "Please just leave me alone!"

There was a short silence, before the bed shifted again, indicating Will had stood up again. "I'm goin' to call Nick, but then I'm comin' back. I won't touch you, I won't speak to you if you don't want me to, but I'm not goin' to leave you by yourself," he said softly, seemingly understanding what was going on. "You don't need to push me away if today's a bad day"

She listened as he left the room, his footsteps carrying away down the stairs. Almost immediately, the dam broke, tears flooding out and soaking her pillow case as she burrowed right under the covers. She wanted everything back how it was. She wanted to feel normal. She wanted days like this, where pain and sadness wanted to crush her like a soda can, to be a thing of the past. Why did it have to be so goddamn hard? Her eyes were already swelling as she lay there sobbing silently into her pillow. Beneath the covers, she pulled her knees up to her chest, curling into the tightest ball she could manage.

It felt like hours later that Will finally came back. He didn't say a word, simply taking a seat on his side of the bed. She didn't want to cry in front of him, but found she couldn't make the tears stop anyway. So she let them fall. Will made no move, simply letting her cry as she needed to, his presence a gentle comfort in the otherwise silent room.

It didn't take long before a restless feeling settled over JJ's body. She tried to fight it, closing her eyes and pushing herself further beneath the covers, but it was futile. Overcome with anxiety, she surprised Will when after almost an hour of hardly moving, she threw the covers back and got to her feet. She began to pace, back and forth along the end of her bed, periodically shaking her hands as if trying to release some of whatever it was she was feeling.

"You ok?" Will asked quietly, clearly unsure whether speaking to her was the right move.

"Is my mom here?" JJ asked tearfully, her body shaking with anxious energy as she paced back and forth alongside her bed.

"No, she went out… said she'd be back around lunch," Will said gently, sitting up a little straighter. JJ kept pacing, her hands frantically wringing together, clenching and unclenching. "JJ, what's wrong?"

"Nothing, I-," JJ stammered, her voice catching in her throat. For the first time, she froze, turning to look at Will as tears welled in her eyes. "I… the last time… last time I felt like this was… the day you left"

Will stayed silent, a heavy feeling settling in his chest as he watched JJ try to piece together what she was attempting to say.

"That… that night, I… I wanted to hurt myself. So I went to my mom, and just being with her made me feel safer, and I made it through the night without going down that path again. But today, for some reason… I feel like… that… again, except, I don't know why," JJ explained, her voice breaking as she started to cry again. "And I know it's stupid because I'm nearly fucking twenty three, but I need my mom"

"Ok," Will said gently, rising from where he was sitting and slowly closing the distance between the two of them. "It's not stupid, Jayje. If you need your mom, you need your mom. Don't you remember me practically cryin' for my mom when I was doubled over in your bathroom with appendicitis?"

JJ let out a sob, her hands shaking as she avoided Will's gaze while trying to retain her composure. "I j-just… ha-ate feeling like t-this. I-I'm sup-posed to be get-getting better," she stammered, her voice barely getting through her nearing hysterical cries. She exhaled heavily, trying to catch her breath as she lifted her hands, balled up in the sleeves of her sweater, and pressed them to her eyes in an attempt to stem the flow of tears.

"Getting' better doesn't mean you're perfect and happy all the time," Will said gently, bringing his hands to rest on her shoulders. "You can recognise when you're havin' a bad day. And the bad days… they're getting' further and further apart"

JJ let out a muffled sob from beneath her hands, prompting Will to gently pull her into his embrace, until her head was tucked beneath his chin.

"You're allowed to have bad days babe. And you don't need to be angry or upset at yourself when you do. It's just another part of healin', and I know it sucks, it sucks to feel like this… but tomorrow is goin' to be a new day"

JJ forced herself to take a deep breath, her arms looping around Will's waist as she relaxed into his hold, her body still shaking with the tears that were rolling through her.

"I'm gonna get you through the day, JJ. I promise you that," Will said softly.

"Don't you have work?" JJ asked tearfully, lifting her face.

"Ok, I'm gonna get you through until your mom gets home," Will replied with a small chuckle, leaning down and pressing a kiss to her forehead.

"Why do you even want to stick around when I'm like this?" JJ sniffed. "I'm a goddamn mess"

Lifting a hand, Will tipped her chin up until she was looking at him. "For better or for worse, right? I love you… all of you, however you come. Just because you have bad days isn't goin' to make me want to leave"

While Will made his way around her room, picking up their things and opening the curtains to flood the room with natural light, JJ had dragged herself into the shower, standing beneath the scalding hot water and allowing it to take her mind momentarily away from her troubles.

She was sure the water had run cold when Will finally coaxed her out. She was so on autopilot that she never even realized Will was seeing her naked for the first time in months. But then, he was wrapping her in a warm towel, leading her back out to the bedroom to find her some clothes.

Once she was dressed, she took a seat in the chair by her vanity, and without words, Will stepped up behind her, picking up the hairbrush sitting to her right. She watched in the mirror for a moment as he began to work on her hair, brushing it from the bottom to free it of all the knots.

His hands were soft and gentle, carefully detangling her hair with the brush, mindful not to pull against the snags. It was the simplest thing, and a necessity since she felt she could hardly lift her arms, but in every movement, the love was crystal clear.

Tears welled in her eyes as she stared down at her lap, her mind trying to make sense of everything she was feeling in that moment. Part of her felt like a little girl again, revelling in the love and attention she was being given. But at the same time, she couldn't understand why; she had never been one to starve for attention. She'd grown up with parents, siblings, friends, coaches and teammates who had all provided her with mountains of attention. Not because she had begged for it, but because it had come as a natural part of her relationships with them all.

"Am I hurtin' you?" Will asked gently, having caught sight of a tear making its way down her face in the mirror. JJ shook her head, lifting a hand to wipe at her cheeks. "Ok good, because I'm goin' to attempt to braid this so you don't have to worry about it again until tomorrow, so you might need to save the tears for that"

JJ let out a watery giggle, warming Will's heart as a smile spread across his face. As he let go of her hair to reach for a hair tie, she tipped her head back, looking up at him through wet eyes. For a moment, she just looked at him, before she broke into the smallest smile. "I love you. I know we say it all the time, but-"

"I know," Will said softly, leaning down and pressing a kiss to her forehead. "I love you too"

"Thank you for being with me today," JJ added. "I'm… not sure what I would've done if you weren't here"

"You don't have to thank me," Will replied. "You needed some help. And you asked for that. I'm proud of you for doin' so"

They fell into a comfortable silence, JJ leaning back in the chair and allowing her eyes to close as she focused on the sensation of Will's hands working through her hair. He was so gentle and methodical in the way he moved that somehow, just sitting there letting him braid her hair was incredibly soothing.

"Alright. That's as good as it's gonna get," he said with a chuckle a couple of minutes later. "Let's go downstairs and get something' to eat"

"I'm not really hungry," JJ replied as she pulled herself out of the chair.

"I know, but you need to eat something. I know your stomach gets funky when you're havin' a rough time, so how about some toast? Just one piece," Will persisted gently, sliding an arm around her waist as they made their way out of the room towards the stairs. She allowed him to guide her down to the kitchen, where she slid up onto one of the counter stools while he set about making her something to eat. She watched as he moved methodically around the kitchen, popping bread into the toaster, boiling the kettle. Just a few minutes later, he was sliding a plate in front of her with a piece of buttered toast, before coming around to sit on the stool beside her with a cup of coffee clutched in his hands. They sat in a comfortable silence, JJ nibbling at her toast, until Will took a deep breath, drumming his fingers against the side of his cup.

"You know… bein' back with you full-time has been… eye openin'"

"How so?" JJ asked quietly.

Will let out a heavy sigh. "I guess… I didn't really understand before. What you were strugglin' with, and just how hard you're fightin' through each day. I kinda… I know now. Not that I think I could ever understand what it's been like to be inside your head for the last twelve months, but… I think I understand a bit more why you reacted the way you did in Los Angeles, and… I don't think I'm so angry anymore. This whole thing, it's… so much bigger than that one night. And I'm sorry I didn't stop and take the time to actually listen and understand what's been goin' on with you"

JJ felt a lump rising up inside her throat. Fighting back tears, she set the piece of toast back down on the plate, before reaching for Will's hand. He opened his in return, the two of them locking their hands together with a gentle touch.

"I never wanted to hurt you," she said quietly, her voice breaking with impending tears. "Never… I… you're the best thing that's ever happened to me. And I'm so sorry I caught you in the crossfire of my own bullshit"

"I know," Will replied, squeezing her hand. "I'm not gonna make you keep apologisin', Jayje, it's… it's alright. We're… we're ok. And right now, I'm gonna make sure you're ok"

"JJ"

The gentle voice broke into JJ's consciousness, pulling her out of an exhausted nap. She stared around blearily for a moment, trying to place where she was, until she finally managed to pull focus towards her mom's face.

"Hey. You were sleeping pretty hard there," Sandy said softly. "I thought I'd wake you up so you don't end up staying up all night"

Stretching the crick in her neck, JJ pushed herself up, making space for her mom to sit down beside her.

"Will said you're having a rough day," Sandy said softly as she gingerly took a seat beside her daughter.

"Yeah," JJ mumbled. "Not one of my best days"

Sandy let out a sigh, making JJ turn to look at her. As she did, she realized how tired and pale her mom looked. Like she was carrying the weight of everything squarely on her back, and running out of energy to keep it there.

Then, to JJ's surprise, tears began streaming down Sandy's cheeks.

"Mom?"

Sandy brought a hand to her mouth, trying to stem the flow of tears as she shook her head. "I'm sorry, JJ, I… I know you're having a bad day, but… I am too"

"What's going on?" JJ asked gently, closing the gap on the couch between them as she watched her mom with concern.

"I just miss your dad," Sandy sobbed. "Of course, I miss him every day… but today I woke up and I felt like it was going to crush me with just how much I miss him. We were supposed to grow old together. And now… I don't know what my future looks like anymore"

Sadness filled JJ's heart as she sidled up beside her mom and wrapped her arms around her. All of a sudden, her own worries seemed infinitely smaller than they had felt that morning. Right now, all she wanted was to take her mom's pain away.

"I'm sorry, Jayje, I was trying to make sure you were ok and now it's all about me," Sandy said tearfully.

"No, Mom, it's ok," JJ reassured her. "You're always so strong for me. Every single day. And I appreciate that," she said softly, lifting her head and looking at her mom through teary eyes. "Just this once, can you let me be the strong one for you?"

Sandy let out a watery chuckle, embracing JJ in return and giving her a loving squeeze. "I know you've been through hell and back this year… but I don't know what I would do without you"

"The feeling is completely mutual," JJ said with a smile.

They sat there for a while, watching as the room grew darker around them, the sun sinking lower and lower in the sky outside. The room was almost completely void of light when Sandy finally spoke up once more.

"I have to confess JJ, I haven't been entirely honest with you recently"

JJ frowned, lifting her head and looking at Sandy in confusion. "What do you mean?"

Sandy took a deep breath, wiping her eyes and turning her body until they were facing each other. "I… I haven't told you this because… I didn't really know how you would react, but… there's no point hiding it, you're going to find out eventually"

JJ stayed silent, waiting for her mom to continue.

"I… I've met someone," Sandy admitted.

"Oh!" JJ exclaimed, her face reading her surprise loud and clear. There was a moment of silence, before she let out a little chuckle. "I thought you were going to say something like… I don't know. But I wasn't expecting that. I was expecting much worse"

Sandy chuckled, reaching across and squeezing JJ's hand. "I just… I never expected something like this to happen so soon. And it's not even anything serious yet, but… I feel like it could go somewhere. I was scared to tell you, and I know that sounds ridiculous, but… losing your dad has been hard on this whole family. I wasn't sure how you would take it"

"Mom," JJ breathed, her face relaxing into a warm smile. "All I could ever want is for you to be happy. Yeah, it's been less than a year since Dad died, but you know he would want exactly the same thing. You told me that after Rio"

"I did," Sandy said with a smile.

"What's his name?"

"Paul," Sandy replied. "We met at… it's not really a support group, more of a group for people who've lost their partners to make friends with others who understand the loss. We've met for coffee a few times, and… I really like him. He's sweet, and he provides just a little bit of stability in a world that, right now, feels like a boat out in stormy seas"

JJ beamed, squeezing her mom's hands. "Well, if you're happy, I'm happy. I promise. I know you loved Dad. You always will, and that's never going to change. Meeting someone new doesn't mean you erase that part of your life"

Sandy let out a laugh, standing up and tugging JJ off the couch with her. "When did you get so wise?"

"I didn't, I just have flights of clarity"

Laughing, the two of them made their way towards the kitchen, ready to whip up a meal together and bring a happy end to what had been an overall rough day for both of them.