CHAPTER 2

Two nightmares and a dream pt2

Disclaimer:I don't own GG
Background: An alternative story in Stars Hollow as continuation of my story 'Love the way you lie'. Rory is coping with the consequences of learning she was molested as a child and findind a new path. Lane is torn between her Korean heritage, her dreams of being a drummer and the loss of her father, while living without grownups for a first time. Abigail (Jess' NY ex who is friends with him and Rory as per my previous story) is tending wounds from her past and adjusting to life in the small city. Couples now and/or eventually Rory/Jess, Lane/Tristan, Abigail/Zack, mentions of Lorelai/Luke

The story will switch between the points of view of the three main girls.

Story 1 spoilers (skip if you plan to read): In the last story Rory got PTSD from being assaulted by Dean and then remembering being molested as a kid. The person that molested her wants to now make reparrations of some sort. Rory and Jess are together and he knows everything. Lane follows the same storyline except with few conversations with Tristan and the day they have the band gig in New York and her mom found out her secrets, her dad died in an airplane crash. Abigail is an ex of Jess that he introduced by Rory because of her experiences with abuse by her (possibly) step-father. Rory and Abigail also sang with the band briefly. Last time Abi was mentioned she was happy and over what happened to her, and dating one of her and Jess's friends in New York. Until she showed up bruised and beated in Stars Hollow. She was helping Rory cope before that. Paris, Lorelai and Luke also had their efforts helping Rory. The first story was concentrated on her, while this one will alternate and get deeper into what is going on with Rory, Abigail and Lane.

Warning: Some chapters may be really triggering

Author's note: I am also not a lot around small children, so please forgive any inaccuracies, they come from lack of experience

(RORY)

1.

The girl in the pink dress with roses was running down the narrow corridor, laughing, holding a balloon.

The picture broke. The girl in the pink dress was running in the garden holding a balloon. It was her birthday. Faster, she had to go faster or unkle Derek would catch up to her.

'Rory, are you okay?' the voice came from somewhere above, like a distant memory. The girl tripped, and the grass and branches cut her tights on the knee, leaving shallow scrapes. She started crying and let go of the pink baloon and it floated away.

'Aw, sweetie, didn't I tell you to be careful? Come with me, unkle Derek will fix it. We can't let your mother see you like that, can we?'

The girl nodded and got up, slipping her hand readily into the hand of the grownup, whom she'd known her whole life. They moved towards the bushes and through them, until they reached a secluded area. Somewhere above a song kept going on and in repeat and the was looking at the sky, because... because...

'Rory!'

She stopped clutching her body in the dark, and looked at Jess, her eyes open in fear. He was about to turn on the light and she nodded negatively. He gently kneeled in front of his girlfriend, who was rocking back and forth. He hadn't seen her in so much distress in a while. It was scary.

'What can I get you? Love?'

She covered her face, and for a second she was present. 'Go help Abi, she's in worse shape.'

'Abi has everyone else. What...' He reached to put a hand on her knee and suddenly she backed away towards one of the beds like he scared her. Except he wasn't sure she could see him. 'I'll get Paris.'

She mumbled no but in some very strange way, her tone low and childlike. 'No one will know. No one can know.'

She was looking at the sky and the song was playing on repeat and there was pressure and she was looking at the sky...

2.

Jess was shaking her. For one horrifying moment the memories clicked like a puzzle that her 6 years old mind couldn't get. But she could now. The girl laying on the grass under the grown man. The erratic breathing as he touched himself and her and... Her breathing came shallow and fast, speeding up. She couldn't. She'd dealt with everything until now, but she couldn't do-

'I'll get Paris.'

She shook her head. ' Love, you-' Jess wasn't even sure how to finish the sentence, before she rose on her feet, still numb and swaying a bit.

'Do you have cigarettes? Lighter?'

'Yes, why?'

'I want a smoke. Or a drink. Possibly both. Jess.' She was holding her chest struggling to breathe. He put both his hands on her forearms to stop her from pacing.

'I won't. You'll hate me later.'

'Isn't later better than now? Let go of me.'

'Rory, you can tell me anything, you know that'

'Let. Go. Of. Me. I-'

'Can you breathe with me?'

He was trying to look at her, and she was doing all she could to avoid his eyes.

'Eff breathing... Give me a cigarette. Give me a f**-' She was close to him, trying to get into his pockets and he struggled to keep her in place. The cigarette box fell out and spilled on the floor.

'Rory, love, please-'

'Stop it. STOP. Stop pretending like you know-'

'You want to smoke tomorrow have at it, I promise. But now-'

She slipped from his arms back into her knees. He tried soothing her again and she flinched. 'Don't!'

'Rory, I know about him, you know I know, stay here with me.'

'STOP. ' She put her hands on her ears, clutching her body and the sobs about to escape from her chest like an inevitable storm. The song playing over and over was breaking and when it was breaking she could hear a man grunting somewhere far and the heaviness over her body. The dirt and grass were getting on her hair and fingers were pushing her knees to to side and she had laughed at first because she thought it was funny and now the sobbing was about to came out, ugly and uncontrollable.

'I'm here. You're safe. You're 17. You're in Stars Hollow. You're safe.'

'It hurts.' the voice kept that low unrecognisable tone he couldn't place. 'No. I can't. I can't. I can't-' She shook her head negatively, finally present and no longer content with the situation. Angry, she was angry, the feeling was building up low in her stomach and raising fast- 'You won't let me do what I want, fine! I'll go help them-'

Jesse followed, dumbfoounded.

3.

Paris was sitting on the couch, chanting her preparation of what she knew about sutures, Zach was setting up the med kit they had available, Tristan was using alcohol wipes to clean the blood from the gash on Abi's head. Rory grabbed the bowl with water from his hands.

'Give me the wipe, I can do it!' She knelt in front of Abi, her hand shaking so much, she had to try twice before approach skin. Paris caught her hand.

'My patient my rules. Your hands are shaking, give it back to Tristan. Go sort yourself. We got this.'

Rory only now realised everyone stared at her, not only for her abrupt entrance- but also because she'd frozen some time ago looking at Abi's shirt and then retreated into Lane's room. They had no clue about what had happened, but it was obvious that Rory wasn't okay. And if she wasn't before- she clearly wasn't better now, pale and shaking.

She looked around the room, her chest flaring up and down. Finally she stormed out, slamming the door behind her. Jess was about to go after her, but with his typical 'middle-child' energy, Zach had a feeling of when he had to mediate. 'Leave it to me man. Just give it a moment.'

She felt Zach sit next to her on the portch swing, and only gave him a side glance for half a second. Her voice would betray her. Her tiny body was already shaking with too much adrenaline. The silence hung like thick honey between them, sticky and nausiating.

'Wanna talk about it?'

She kept staring at the distance, shaking. She shook her head no. 'Was that about you ex? Or what happened to Abi?' She nodded negatively again.'I mean we can sit here as long as you want, but- Wanna write about it?'

She shook her head no and finally spoke. 'Got smokes?'

'But you don't-'

'I wish people would stop saying what I do and don't do. Alcohol-'

'I'm not a walking store...'

'Fine, then I should go to one.'

'Rory...'

'Jeez. Are you gonna give me the disappointed big brother speech?'

'No.' But the idea got in his head already. 'Do you wanna come for a walk?'

'Sure, but I don't see what-'

But he'd already went to tell the others they'll be away for a bit. Then he got on his bike and she climed at the back of it standing, holding onto his shoulders as he biked all the way to his parents house. It was still a warm summer night and the wind in her hair felt nice. Her heart felt heavy.

4.

When they entered the house, she saw a teen girl with blondish cirls, similar to Zach in some ways, watch over 2 small children who were drawing. One of the small girls looked like a tiny female version of Zach. The other had becautiful naturally red hair, braided in 2 braids. The teen instructed the girls and came over.

'Hey, I'm Kayla. Zach's cousin.' that explained the resemblance. Rory held out her hand, completely feeling out of water and unsure of what she was doing here. She was always unsure of what to do with children, but tonight of all nights...

'Rory. Gilmore.'

'Oh- you sang with Zach's band? Beautiful voice.'

'Thanks, I guess.' She gave Zach a drowning look, wanting to leave.

'So, I know you've been watching my sister and yours all day while I move, so we are giving you a break. Rory here will stay with them for a moment, and you and I are going to take a walk.'

'Wha- right, sure.' She couldn't say no now, but she gave Zach another drowining look. What did she know about children? Or life? Unfortunately, Zach didn't get it, or didn't care either way.

' It's okay, it's just for half an hour. Girls, come say hi!'

The girls approached, Zach's sister with long hair in the same color as his, but in big locks falling down her back and ribbons in her hair. She was wearing a write dress and pink leggings and approached a bit shyly. More forward, the other girl gave out her tiny hand for a handshake, with her red braids, dressed in blue sweather and jeans with crayon markings on them.

'I am Amber. I am 6 and 1/2.' Said confidently the redhead. 'And this is Maggie, she's 5.' The curly hair girl behind her smiled shyly and nodded.

'Girls, this is your aunty Rory here, and she'll draw with you for half an hour, while me and Kayla have a walk, okay? You better behave well...'

Rory gave Zach a last lost look and then she was being led to the couch by tiny hands. Completely beyond her, suddenly she was on her knees next to the table, drawing with them. She had thought looking after them would be hard, but they seemed well-behaved. They were also strongly opinionated on what they wanted so really she didn't need to think much about what to say except answer. That's how she got roped into drawing a guy of some sort next to the princess and castle they were drawing. To be fair, she'd gotten a chance between the knight on white horse, tiara, and the bad guys. So there she was drawing a guy with the cheapest crayons spread in colorful pieces actoss the table.

'Is her brother your boyfriend?' inquired Amber boldly.

'What? No.'

'Do you have a boyfriend?'

'Yes. Jess.''

' I want to have a boyfriend.'

'Me too.'

'Maybe in a few years girls.' More like 10, if they were lucky, she thought. How had she found herself interrogated by 5 year olds? She had to turn this around.' So what are you drawing, girls?'

'This is princess Aurora.' The princess had a long pink flowy dress and Rory's stomach turned, but she couldn't show weakness while watching someone else's children. 'Her hair grows flowers and it can heal anyone she touches.'

'From anything?' Rory inquired, curious from the imagination on them.

'Yes, any-thing.' Amber said proudly, as if she alone was responsible for the magical hair.

'And this is the castle.' Maggie pointed. It looked a bit like the Inn, but with more floors and colorful flags, but Rory didn't correct her. 'It has a 1000 rooms, and every room has another room inside it, that has another room inside it.' She said, also proud. 'Rory, but what about the bad guy... he's ... just a guy?'

Rory looked at her own part of the picture bewildred. She hadn't realised whom she was drawing. She'd drawn a man that was towering way above the princess, but was otherwise dressed in jeans and regular gingham print black shirt and had curly hair just like... Thankfully, she could rely on little girls not to leave her in silence for too long. Now Amber spoke.

'But Rory- if the bad guy is just a guy, how will princess Aurora know he IS the bad guy?'

Rory blinked away the tears and found her voice again. 'Great point Amber... What do you think I should add, girls?'

'Horns'

'And a tail!'

' Yes, a tail, like the devil!'

Rory gave out small hysteric laugh. This was weirdly healing. She got 2 crayons and turned to the small faces looking at her expectantly.'Black or red?'

4.

Saved just in time, as Zach and Kayla walked in.

'So girls, did you behave for aunty Rory?'

'We did, we did!'

Zach noticably looked at Rory, ignoring the 2 children jumping up and down in front of him. She nodded with a crooked smile she'd started adopting from Jess. 'And what do you girls get when you behave?'

'Presents?'

Zach showed his hands from behind him, holding 2 swirly lollipops in rainbow colors. The girls extatically took them, comparing colors and switching what they were given. Rory giggled at the scene where the most complex and important thing in the world seemed to be which color of lollipop you had gotten.

'So girls, me and aunty Rory have to go now, but I am leaving you in Kayla's capable hands.'

With protest, both girls rushed, hugging Rory on both sides. Before she was allowed to leave, Amber called her over and she kneeled, so the redhead can whisper in her ear. 'When I get sad, mom tucks me in to sleep, and by the next morning it smells of breakfast and I am better.' she said in her tiny voice, confidently.

Rory pulled a little back to look at the blue eyes with long thick lashes staring back at her.

'You think I am sad?' she whispered.

'Aren't you?'

'I promise to sleep long and well tonight.' she couldn't disappointed the small human in front of her although she knew it wasn't something she could promise.

When they left, Zach decided to leave his bike, and they walked back.

'How was it?' How did you know what I needed? She wasn't going to ask. Children didn't get metaphors, but they had logic and magic on their side. Gave a strange perspective to problems.

'Weird.' She muttered. ' They were great though.' She added guiltily, trying to convey that the weirdness wasn't their fault.

'Oh, I know. Sometimes you just need a bit of play time to get perspective.'

'Sometimes you do.'

'Will you tell him now?'

'I don't know how.'

'Why?'

'Things have been... better lately. This is not better.'

Zach shrugged. 'It is what it is Rory, it's life. You can't script it. Do you want him to know?'

She contemplated. 'Yes.'

'And why can't you-'

Rory stopped and looked around. It was late at night, not many people to catch that conversation. Reconsidering, she started walking again, pushing her fingers firmly in her pockets until her nails were digging into the fabric uselessly.

5.

This time Zach stopped and uncharacteristically pulled her in one of the side streets so they can talk this out before getting into the house. Being in the middle had meant that often he had to settle things between his big brother and little sister and figure out what was wrong on the spot. Jess and Rory deserved every bit of that.

'Rory? I don't know what happened, but there are only 2 choices- Do you want to tell him or not?'

'I don't want him to know. He might have to.'

'Why?'

Her bottom lip trembled, just like his little sister's when she was sad but trying not to cry. 'Because I might decide to meet the guy that sexu- that abused me.'

He was even more confused. 'Dean? Your ex-boyfriend, right? Didn't he leave town?'

'He did.'

'I don't understand.' Always calm in the middle of a storm, Zach was completely oblivious to hurricane of feelings those questions brought in her. She dug her fingers in her pockets until she felt skin, and started riggidly walking away.

'Not Dean. My uncle. When I was 6 until I was 8.' Dumbfounded, Zach just held her from walking away by the elbow. Her face, turned away from his in the shadows, looked down, shame swallowing her. He wasn't saying anything so she spoke. 'I didn't want- I didn't. want. what-'

Zach pulled her in a protective hug, envelopping her. 'Of course not. You were molested.'

Rory broke in uncontrollable sobs now, feeling completely surreal, and just let the hug envelop her.