GermanGal16, thanks for being my lone review of substance since I posted the last chapter. This chapter is dedicated to you.
32.
Mr. Dash and Captain Wentworth were both left dissatisfied by their conversation about Anne's potential role in sick bay. For his part, Frederick had never really reflected on the reality that if Anne were to tend the sick and injured, she would be surrounded by men and away from him. It should have been obvious, he reflected, but so used to being in exclusively male company was he that he scarcely thought about how different this was than life upon England's shores. But it was different when he considered how it would be for Anne.
Frederick's sister had long sailed with Captain Croft, so he knew it could be done, but he realized that to his shame he had never asked the two of them just how they made it work with her being a woman and all, what her day-to-day life was like. He cast about for some tidbit of conversation or dashed line in her letters that explained how she lived being the sole woman aboard. But all he could recall were the adventures Sophia related and well recalled, even some he had told Anne when he was trying to explain years earlier during their short-lived engagement that as his wife she could live aboard his ship, not the banalities and routines of how she lived each day. Frederick did not even know whether Sophia was mostly by her husband's side, stayed in their cabin until he was free, or had some other pursuit away from him and the cabin. He did not know if his brother by marriage hired someone to guard her from the rough men or if Captain and Mrs. Croft were so respected by the collective crew that the sailors themselves all watched out for her should some man prove unruly and forward.
Frederick considered further. He could not imagine his sister confined all day, and she would have certainly gotten in the way if she simply followed Captain Croft around everywhere. Too, she had a confidence, an independence of spirit which she had always had, but which had only increased after her marriage. On no account was she limited to their cabin or always within eyesight of her husband, and he imagined she would chaff if not allowed to move freely.
Finally, being dissatisfied with his progress in working the whole thing out, Frederick reviewed a stack of letters from the past five years, ones from his sister and ones from Captain Croft and found clues. Frederick learned that Sophia referenced writing a letter dictated to her from an illiterate member of the crew. Frederick read accounts of stories Sophia had gained from the crew.
Captain Croft explained she recorded these stories all in a journal, along with who their families were, and where they could be found. He also mentioned how this came in handy as Sophia wrote all the letters of condolence when any sailor was lost, derived from these accounts and his own reflection on the man, softened and prettied up for the sailor's wife or other family, with Sophia allowing Captain Croft to sign and take the credit.
Sophia discussed the distress of newly impressed land lubbers who did not know port from starboard and were pitched about by a gentle swell before they gained their sea legs. Captain Croft related how she bought a store of ginger candies to give them to settle their stomachs. He explained that Sophia demonstrated how she could easily walk about with a wider gait even in her skirts and how this sometimes was the impetus they needed to work on trying or perfecting this stride, for after all if she could do it, they would not be shown up by a woman.
Sophia included pencil sketches of life aboard the ship and of the ports they visited. Captain Croft recalled a gift Sophia had made of a drawing of the purser so he could send it to his wife so that his daughter who was born some five years ago might know him when he finally had leave. Captain Croft also described the bevy of men who having seen the work then requested similar services of her and how while his wife was willing, he was obliged to set up a lottery of whom she would draw something for each week, with only the men who showed good conduct could be entered.
Sophia reflected on singing sea chanties with the men and the joy she felt in such music and seeing the men dance. Captain Croft noted that it was Sophia who taught them some cheerful airs and encouraged the lads to sing with her.
Sophia mentioned her distress that men had to wear wet slops as if they were cleansed in salt water that they never truly dried and suggested having them laundered while they were at port was a good way to raise crew morale. Captain Croft related that Sophia had determining that the men's slops ought to be laundered ashore with fresh water at every significant port and how she had to make sure each man marked his slops with his initials or she did it for him, so they would trust getting their own pants back, and bargain with him to allow two extra men shore leave if they would but deliver the slops and bring them back, and how in knowing she and the crew were depending on this being done, never deserted.
Sophia recalled teaching a lad to read, and how she felt a bit of distress that she would never have a child, but being cheered when her husband said the whole crew was her family, that she had sons, uncles and brothers a plenty. Captain Croft reflected on how well she did at teaching the young lads who were illiterate or nearly so, of how she had determined to learn from himself and other officers what knowledge was needed for any to advance to midshipman so that she could keep up their useful instruction after they learned the basics. Captain Croft explained that she did so well at helping many pass this exam that some of the older men sought her out for instruction of their own.
Sophia wrote of learning knitting during the horrible season she was ashore, simply to have something to do. Captain Croft explained about her then putting that skill to good use later by knitting a cap for a grizzled and bald lieutenant whose own cap had been lost during a gale. And this recitation was far from complete; there were plenty of other things besides.
Frederick's respect for his sister grew with each new brief mention of a useful occupation she had undertaken. She never boasted in any of these things, just related in a line or two her pleasure in what the men had accomplished, scarcely crediting herself. It was in Captain Croft's letters that a more complete account was told.
Frederick recalled his dream of Anne, how in the dream she had spoken to him of teaching the young lads; undoubtedly his mind had recalled how Sophia had done so, but how much more had his sister done besides! He chuckled at himself for imagining Sophia might have remained confined. Clearly there was much for a woman to do if she simply stayed alert and aware of things that ought to be done, many things that might go undone elsewhere, but could not help but raise the men's morale. What a benefit a captain's wife, the right wife, could be for not only the captain himself but for his entire crew!
Frederick was humbled. He had not needed to suggest that Anne learn to be a nurse, although it was undoubtedly a useful skill, for he was certain that like his sister she would have made herself useful. It also occurred to him then that by not seeking out his beloved earlier, not only had he deprived himself of her, but his crew as well.
While Frederick was doing such reflecting, Mr. James Dash was, too. He did not like that he had spoken to his captain with the disrespect he had, even if he had more or less taken it back. But it still raised his hackles, as if he were a cat, when he thought about any woman mucking about in his sickbay. But why?
As he supervised his loblolly boy and his mates at their tasks, removed a long splinter from a man's hand and went about the more mindless tasks of inventorying his supplies for restocking once they reached shore once more, he found his mind wandering to his wife and children, all dead now more than fourteen years. He had not always been a ship's surgeon. No, he had once worked solely on land and been happy enough. He smiled slightly to himself in recalling his wife and two small sons, before his face pinched in remembering how they had all been lost.
John had been a barber surgeon for a few years when he was recruited by a friend to serve in the army. While with the army he became an expert at quick amputations, inured to the men who sometimes screamed and thrashed about, had to be held down while he did what had to be done. Yes, many of them died after, but when injured limbs began to stink, there was nothing else to do and some chance was better than none. He also became an expert at administering mercury treatments for diseased men who had paid for company and received more than they expected in return. Eventually, he tired of that life and having carefully saved his money for years resolved to return home and take a wife.
John returned to what was now his brother's home as a man of almost forty. He resumed his occupation as a barber surgeon and soon thereafter courted their near neighbor's daughter, who had not yet been born when he left for London.
Jane Sil undoubtedly had been plain by any objective measure even in the height of her bloom. Some called her ugly, unable to ignore her missing two front teeth, broken off in an accident, which her father had paid good money to replace with dentures made of walrus ivory with imbedded teeth of the dead, but which she found too uncomfortable to wear. John had certainly seen worse and after their first few encounters hardly paid this defect any mind at all, except when he had trouble understanding a word or two from her, until his ears were attuned to how she said things. But what he had noticed right after the missing teeth was that she was good natured, did not hold back from smiling and laughing, did not hesitate to make jokes at her own expense, had a sort of bouncing, dancing step when she was happy. Next he noticed how kind she was, even to people who stared at her, even to people she should have thought ill of for their poor manners.
John recalled hearing from his brother how the butcher had made sport of her to her face, handing her two bloody horse teeth as a "gift" but then snatched them back while making a joke that he dared not repeat given John's thunderous expression. At that moment John had been desirous of knocking the man's own teeth out to see how he might like the ridicule. It was this event which made John come to the point with Jane, for John recognized in his visceral reaction how much he had come to care for his neighbor's daughter, how he wished to protect her always. Two days later John proposed and was accepted and it seemed to him that Jane danced all the way to the altar some three weeks hence.
They had a good life for five years, which was enough time to grant them two sons and have another on the way. But it was all snatched away one afternoon while John was plying his trade. The boys had been napping under the supervision of a neighbor girl. She had fled with no care for what would become of them.
Jane, spotting the smoke, went after them with no thought for herself, desperate to get them out. All had died, overcome by the smoke before he ever learned there was a fire. John had considered ending it all, but in the end he received more training and went to sea.
John soon came to understand that his immediate rejection of any help from a new Mrs. Wentworth was born of envy, that Captain Wentworth could have what John could not. John was certain he would die some day on a ship, without ever having another wife, any more children. He had his chance, had his Mrs. Dash, his Tommy and his Ronny, but it was long gone. Mrs. Wentworth would just be a reminder of all of that he could never get back.
Being men, neither Frederick or John ever apologized, Frederick for assuming he could just add his future wife to the surgeon's staff with not even a by-your-leave, John for rejecting the whole idea out of hand. But Frederick did say a few days later, "I understand you will need to assess my future wife's skill before you will let her treat your patients" and John rejoined "I have no objection to additional help should she have the needed skill." This both were left satisfied.
As for Anne, by the time Captain Wentworth and Mr. Dash had worked this out, she and Mrs. Croft were endeavoring to convince Mirabella Holmes to sail with them to the West Indies aboard Admiral Croft's flag ship. Mirabella was unsure what to do. Although she had already come to love her "sisters" she could not but think that they would have their husbands and that there was no place for her. It was one thing to be housed with a single Anne, but what should she do after that? She could hardly imagine it. She would have happily been either woman's companion or maid, but where was she to sleep? What if she was sea sick?
They were at an impass until Admiral Croft found out, in a bit of good luck that Mirabella's son, Edgar, was serving aboard one of the two ships which was accompanying Captain Wentworth's ship. He immediately declared, "Mrs. Holmes, here is what I will do. I will see to Edgar's transfer to either Captain Wentworth's ship or my own. Surely if he is on the selfsame ship as yourself, you may enjoy some time at sea even if somewhat disordered for a time." Naturally she agreed.
When Admiral Croft and his wife were abed, she mentioned to him as he held her tight, "Perhaps we can find a Captain for Mrs. Holmes to marry. While I wish all could marry for love, I think she would be happier aboard a ship with her son near, than she has been as a widow upon land."
A/N: I hope you enjoyed this update. If so, please show some love with a review. Reviews get me to write.