Author's Note: Well, this is it. The finale to "Who Framed Roger Rabbit". I had to update a day late because yesterday was my birthday, and I was out celebrating with my friends.
I put a lot of effort into nailing everyone's reaction into Judge Doom's nightmarish reveal. Let me know what you guys think. And keep those votes coming in. The poll will be open for a few more days after this update. Choose wisely.
Once again, if I've made any mistakes, point them out and I'll fix them ASAP.
Review Responses
MarioCatjr, March 21st: Don't sweat it. I never listen to trolls with nothing substantial to say. If he/she doesn't like my story, that's his/her problem.
Guest review, March 17th: Whatever, troll. If you don't like my story, don't read it. Simple as that.
JC of the Corn: Join the club. I first watched Roger Rabbit when I was 10. Judge Doom gave me nightmares for weeks. It wasn't until high school I dared to watch that scene again.
OldGlory: It was a nightmare for everyone as a kid. And it could have been worse. Originally Tim Curry was supposed to play Doom, but he was considered simply too scary for the role. Also, RIP Bob Hoskins.
Komod0-Sensei: Tell me about it. Lena freaked me out as a kid almost as much as Judge Doom. That's no small feat.
a54321: You're very welcome.
QrowxBar: I doubt it. No offense to you, but personally I found the sequels to 'Die Hard' and 'Robocop' to be a little disappointing compared to the first films in each franchise.
Greer123: I'm doing well. I've just been busy. Thanks for asking.
Inspiration: Who Framed Roger Rabbit?
Disclaimer: The following is a non-profit story for entertainment purposes only. "RWBY" is the property of director and animator Monty Oum (RIP) and production company Rooster Teeth, and "Who Framed Roger Rabbit" is the property of director Robert Zemeckis and production companies Touchstone Pictures, Amblin Entertainment, and Silver Screen Partners and distributed by Buena Vista Pictures.
Inside Port's factory, the Toon Patrol searched Qrow for the will as they held him and Glynda at gunpoint.
"We searched Branwen, boss. The will ain't on him," Smart-Ass notified Tyrian.
"Then frisk the woman!" Tyrian ordered.
"I'll handle this one..." Greasy insisted.
Greasy rolled up his sleeve and put his hand between Glynda's breasts with a lecherous look on his face.
Glynda flushed red with embarrassment and rage. "Perverted bastard!" she hissed.
Yang narrowed her eyes at Greasys piggish behavior. "If any guy pulled that on me, he'd lose that hand," she growled.
They'd never admit it out loud, but several male audience members wished they were Greasy at that moment.
"More like lucky bastard," Qrow muttered under his breath with a smirk.
There was a snapping sound and Greasy cried out in pain as he quickly withdrew his hand from Glynda's bust with a large beartrap clamped around it.
The weasels started laughing at Greasys misfortune.
"Nice booby Trap," Qrow quipped while Glynda smirked.
Everyone laughed at the joke while Glynda grinned at her counterpart's cunning trap.
"Serves you right, you lech!" Weiss called out.
"Damn, that was a good one," Yang said as she nodded in respect for Qrows pun.
Tyrian whacked Greasy with his cane, sending him crashing into a pile of boxes spilling fake eyes all over the floor.
"Do they have the will or not?!" Tyrian asked impatiently.
"Nah. Just this stupid love letter," Smart-Ass replied.
"So, there's still hope," Jaune said with renewed optimism.
"No matter. I doubt if that will is going to show up in the next 15 minutes anyway," Tyrian said.
"What happens in the next fifteen minutes?" Qrow asked.
"Toontown will be legally mine. Lock, stock, and barrel," Tyrian announced.
"Or not..." Jaune deflated from his earlier statement.
"I figured he'd be the sole owner in Port's absence," Maria said, considering Tyrian still had Toontown under his jurisdiction.
"But what about Cloverfield? Where do they factor in?" Weiss questioned as she scratched her chin in puzzlement.
Ozpin exited the Toontown tunnel in Qrow's damaged car. He stopped in front of Benny, who still lay dazed on the side of the road.
"Benny! Is that you?" Ozpin asked.
"No! It's Councilman Sleet!" Benny snarked.
"He's still got his dry wit, so I guess he's all right," Terra pointed out.
Benny got up and limped towards Ozpin on his rear tires, wincing from his injuries as he went.
"Jumping Jeepers. What happened?" Ozpin asked in concern.
"Tyrian grabbed your wife and Qrow and took them to the Port factory," Benny informed.
"The Port factory? I know where that is. Get in!" Ozpin commanded.
"I don't think Ozpin should drive there," Glynda said, remembering Ozpin was a bad driver.
"It can't be worse than Benny's driving," Weiss countered as she sipped a glass of water.
"Move over Oz. You've done enough driving for one night," Benny said as he climbed into the drivers seat and drove off, bound for Port factory.
Nora giggled at the screen. "Look at that. A car driving another car."
"I wonder who the worst driver is," Jaune wondered aloud.
Yang shrugged. "As long as they get there in one piece," she reasoned.
Back at the Port Factory, Stupid and Wheezy had just dug through one of the brick walls. Rays of technicolor light shined through, and faint cheery music was audible.
"Duh, Toontown's right on the other side of the wall, boss," Stupid drawled.
"What's Tyrian planning to do to Toontown?" Ruby asked anxiously.
"I have a feeling it's something horrible," Ren guessed correctly, remembering the Dip.
"You see Mr. Branwen? The successful conclusion of this case draws a curtain for my career as a jurist in Toontown. I'm retiring. To take a new role in the private sector," Tyrian explained.
"That wouldn't be Clover Leaf Industries by any chance?" Qrow asked as he stepped forward, but Smart-Ass stopped him at gunpoint.
"You're looking at the sole stock holder," Tyrian informed the heroes.
There were few gasps throughout the theater at Tyrians revelation that he owned Cloverleaf all along.
"He's running Cloverfield?!" Winter said in surprise.
"It all makes sense now," Weiss said as she connected all the dots. "He killed Port to get his hands on Toontown and then Jacques to tie up any loose ends."
"And he framed Ozpin to help stay under the radar," Glynda finished with a fiery look in her eyes, angered that Tyrian murdered one of her colleagues and framed another
"Clever bastard," Ozpin admitted begrudgingly.
Ozpin and Benny arrived outside the Port Factory. Ozpin hopped out with Schnee's gun in hand.
"Benny. You go for the cops. I'm going to save my wife," Ozpin instructed as he got out of the car, holding the gun with shaking hands.
"Be careful with that gun," Benny replied as he pushed the gun away. "This ain't no cartoon, you know."
"Benny's right. Ozpin is no fighter in this universe. He should just stick with Benny," Qrow reasoned.
Winter balked at Qrow. "And abandon his wife?" she asked in outrage.
"I didn't say that. But he's just one Toon with a gun against six guys," Qrow defended his point.
"He has a point. The odds are stacked against my counterpart," Ozpin admitted.
Benny shook his head as he drove off. "This is no way to make a living," he grumbled.
Ozpin tried to open one of the factory windows, but it was apparently locked.
"Wouldn't you know? Locked," Ozpin groused as he leaned against the window.
The window suddenly swung open, and Ozpin spun round and round. "Waaaagghhahaahaa!"
Ozpin fell into the factory and landed in a toilet. It promptly flushed, sucking the rabbit down into the pipes below.
"Ewww!" Ruby, Nora, and Weiss chorused loudly in disgust.
"I hope the last one using it remembered to flush," Yang said with a look of aversion.
Back inside the factory Tyrian approached a large object covered by a tarp. He dropped a silver tray onto the floor pulled it aside.
Tyrian opened a valve releasing Dip onto the tray which then began to smoke. "Can you guess what this is?"
"Oh my Oum! It's DIIIIIP!" Glynda screamed in horror, her pupils dilating.
"Whoa. Even she can show toon like expressions," Kali said in surprise at Glynda's break from her usual stoicism.
"I don't blame her," Maria said, referring to the fear Dip undoubtedly elicited from Toons.
"That's right my dear. Enough to dip Toontown of the face of Remnant!" Tyrian declared as he pulled off the tarp, revealing a giant vehicle while Qrow and Glynda looked on in horror.
The whole audience gasped sharply at Tyrians intentions and the machine he had just uncovered.
"He's going to destroy Toontown?!" Ruby cried out with outrage.
Nora furiously crushed her soda cup. "And kill all of the Toons!? How dare he!" she snarled.
"That fucking monster!" Taiyang hissed.
"A vehicle of my own design. Five-thousand gallons of heated Dip, pumped at enormous velocity through a pressurized water cannon," Tyrian explained as he pointed at the cannon with his cane. "Toontown will be erased in a matter of minutes!"
Wheezy coughed as he finished pouring the last barrel of Dip into the machine's huge tank.
"But what is this even all about?" Glynda asked. "Some kind of crusade against Toons?"
"It reminds me of Adam's vendetta against humans," Blake noted with distaste.
"This isn't a crusade we're talking about. This is genocide!" Maria declared.
"I suppose you think no one's going to notice Toontown's disappeared?" Glynda asked dubiously.
"Who's got time to wonder what happened to some ridiculous Toons when you're driving by at 75 m.p.h.?" Tyrian replied disparagingly.
Oscar blinked. "What's that supposed to mean?" he asked.
"Only highways and other major roads have speed limits that high," Maria pointed out.
"So what. He's plans to build a road in Toontown's place?" Winter presumed with a hint of confusion.
"What are you talking about? There's no road past Toontown," Glynda stated.
"Not yet! Several months ago, I had the good providence to stumble upon a plan of the city councils," Tyrian said, slipping briefly on the fake eyes on the floor. "A construction plan of epic proportions. They're calling it, a freeway."
"A freeway?" Qrow said in confusion. "What the hell's a freeway?"
"Eight lanes of shimmering cement running from here to Mt. Glenn. Smooth, safe, fast. Traffic jams will be a thing of the past," Tyrian explained as he approached Qrow and Glynda.
"Oh, that's right. This takes place a long time ago. Freeways don't even exist yet," Ruby realized.
"Indeed. With the demand of cars rising rapidly, larger roads were necessary to decrease traffic jams, as Tyrian said," Maria explained, having witnessed freeway construction firsthand in her youth.
"Unless the Grimm don't exist in this universe, it's doomed to fail," Glynda remarked, noting that the freeway would stretch to My. Glenn.
"So that's why you killed Port and Schnee? For this Freeway?" Qrow asked in puzzlement. "I don't get it."
"Of course not. You lack vision," Tyrian said scornfully. "I see a place where people get on and off the Freeway. On and off. Off and on. All day, all night."
Tyrian approached the hole in the wall leading to Toontown while Qrow and Glynda exchanged glances.
Nora frowned. "He's insane this guy," she voiced the thoughts of Qrow and Glynda's counterparts.
"And he loves to hear himself talk, doesn't he?" Blake added with distaste, reminded of grandiose speeches Adam used to give.
"It explains why Jacques refused to play a part. Even he didn't want Toontown destroyed for profit," Weiss said, surprised this version of her father had some standards.
"Soon where Toontown once stood will be a string of gas stations. Inexpensive motels. Restaurants that serve rapidly prepared food. Tire salons. Automobile dealerships. And wonderful, wonderful billboards reaching as far as the eye can see."
"And he intends to monopolize on it all," Oscar said.
"So, it wasn't about some misguided sense of justice after all. It was all about money," Ozpin sneered at Tyrians greed.
"My Oum. It'll be beautiful," Tyrian whispered, engrossed at his insidious plan.
"Come on. Nobody's gonna drive this lousy Freeway when they can take the red car for a nickel," Qrow argued.
"Oh, they'll drive. They'll have to," Tyrian. "You see, I bought the Red Car so I could dismantle it."
"That explains why it was bought earlier," Winter deducted. "He's eliminating as much competition as he can."
There was a rumbling sound and a tremor shook the ground.
"What the?" Smart-Ass said in confusion.
Greasy looked down at the manhole beneath him. Suddenly, it burst into a geyser of water that launched him into the air and left him hanging from a net holding bricks from the ceiling. Ozpin emerged from the hole and landed in front of Tyrian with the gun in hand.
"O.K. Nobody move. Alright weasels, grab some sky or I let the Judge have it," Ozpin demanded. "You heard me I said drop it."
The weasels complied and dropped their weapons.
"Well, look at that. Ozpin came through after all," Ruby said happily.
"Don't speak too soon, sis," Yang warned, skeptical if Ozpin could save the day.
"Ozpin, darling!" Glynda cooed.
Ozpin hopped over to Glynda. "Yes, it's me my dearest!" he said as he took her hand lovingly. "I'd love to embrace you but first I have to satisfy my sense of moral outrage."
Ozpin pointed the gun at Tyrian. "Put that gun down, you buck toothed fool!" Tyrian ordered.
"That's it Tyrian. Give me another excuse to pump ya full of lead!" Ozpin threatened. "Thought you could get away with it didn't you?"
Above Ozpin, Greasy still hung from the net and took out a knife.
"Uh-oh," Saprhon said worriedly.
"Watch out, Ozpin!" Ruby cried.
"Ha! We Toons may act idiotic but we're not stupid. We demand justice. Why, the real meaning of the word probably hits you like a ton of bricks!"
As if on cue, a literal ton of bricks landed on Ozpin, burying him completely. Greasy smirked from the cut open net hanging above.
Everyone groaned as Ozpin's attempt to play hero was foiled. Adrien whined and looked down in despair.
"The goon should have just stayed outside," Qrow commented while shaking his head.
Yang would have made a pun on the weasels getting the drop on Ozpin, but realized it wasn't an appropriate time.
"Ozpin! Ozpin!" Glynda cried as she rushed to her husband. "Say something!"
Ozpin's head poked out of the bricks, seeing stars.
"Look! Stars! Ready when you are Bart" Ozpin said in a daze.
Nora frowned and shook her head. "It's far too late for that," she said sadly.
"He's not very good at this hero stuff," Oscar said bluntly as he munched on some popcorn.
"Unfortunately, you're right," Ozpin sighed in frustration towards his counterpart.
Qrow looked disheartened by Ozpin's failed heroic act.
"Tie the lovebirds together," Tyrian ordered the weasels.
"Well, at least Ozpin tried," Saphron said solemnly.
"So, what's Qrow going to do now?" Terra asked while Adrien looked worried.
"They're only hope is for the police to intervene," Glynda answered, though she believed it was probably too late.
Short cut to Tyrian grabbing a control pad suspended from an overhanging wire. "Put them up on that hook. Use that escape proof Toon rope."
The Weasels complied and tied Ozpin and Glynda together.
"Time to kill the rabbit!" Psycho giggled as manned the dip cannon mounted on the vehicle.
"How is he even going to explain all of this? Nobodies going to let him get away with this!" Blake asked indignantly.
"Well, Ozpin is still a wanted fugitive," Kali reminded. "Tyrian could lie and say Glynda was behind everything and seduced Qrow into going along with it."
"Plus, he could always say Toontown's destruction was an accident, and the Weasels will back him up," Ghira added.
Tyrian pushed a button on the control pad, lifting the bound Toon couple into the air.
"Oh Ozpin. You were magnificent," Glynda praised her husband.
"At getting caught," Qrow mumbled as he sipped from his flask.
"Was I really?" Ozpin asked.
"Better than Jaune," Glynda assured.
"Hey!" Jaune said in offense.
"Don't worry Jaune," Nora said as she pinched her leader's cheek. "You'll always be our little goofball."
Greasy hopped behind the wheel of the Dip vehicle and started the engine. The huge machine thrummed to life.
"Ozpin darling. I want you to know I love you. I've loved you more than any woman's ever loved a rabbit," Glynda confessed, prompting Ozpin to give her a touched smile.
"Awwww," Saphron, Terra, and Kali all cooed together at the bittersweet scene.
"At least they'll die together," Glynda said, trying to hold back tears caused by counterpart professing her love for Ozpin.
"Don't be such a downer, Ms. Goodwitch," Ruby scolded. "Uncle Qrow will think of something."
Tyrian approached Qrow "It's over, Mr. Branwen," he said triumphantly.
Tyrian began to walk away whistling, but then slipped on the spilled toon eyes and fell flat on his back. The weasels started to laugh again. Qrow then tried to sneak up on Smart Ass.
Tyrian got to his feet while clutching his right eye. "Look out! You fools!" he warned.
Smart-Ass spun around to face Qrow. "Not so fast."
"I'm guessing those dirty Weasels were promised a percentage in exchange for wiping out their own kind," Weiss growled, reminded of her greedy father.
"You'd be surprised how many people will betray their families and friends for personal gain," Glynda said, her voice laced with disgust for the Toon patrol.
"One of these days, you idiots are going to laugh yourselves to death," Tyrian reprimanded the Toon Patrol.
Just then, Qrow got an idea from Tyrian's remark.
"Oooooh... lightbulb," Maria announced, realizing what Qrow had in mind.
"Huh?" several audience members said in puzzlement.
Inside Oscar's mind, Ozpin also realized what Qrow was thinking and nodded in anticipation.
"Shall I "repose" of him right now Boss?" Smart-Ass asked.
"Let him watch his Toon friends get dipped then shoot him," Tyrian ordered
"With pleasure," Smart-Ass chuckled.
Tyrian walked out of the room, leaving the Toon patrol to handle everything.
"Yes! He has an opening," Maria said excitedly.
"What do you mean? How is he going to stop them?" Nora asked as she nervously sipped a soda.
"Everything's funny to you, ain't it needle nose?" Qrow sneered at Smart-Ass
"You got a problem with that, Branwen?" Smart-Ass challenged, poking the gun into Qrow's chest.
Qrow put his hands up and backed away towards a music machine. "Nah. I just, uh, want you to know something about the guy you're gonna dip!"
Qrow reached behind him, pulled a lever, and pressed a switch on the music machine, starting it up. It played "Merry-Go-Round Broke Down."
"What's he doing now?" Ruby wondered about her Uncles intentions.
Yang shook her head. "I don't know. But it better be good," she replied.
"I have a feeling it will be," Maria said with a smile.
"Whaaaaaa?" Smart-Ass shouted in alarm as the machine lit up while Qrow began to sing an improvised song.
"Now Ozpin is his name. And laughter is his game."
"Come on you dope. Untie his rope. And watch him go insane."
Everybody watched dumbfounded as Qrow waltzed towards a rake and stepped on it, causing it to slam into his head. He then jumped on it in reverse, and it slammed into him again, sending him tumbling across the floor and stopping front of Smart-Ass.
The entire audience stared slack-jawed at first before howling with laughter at Qrow's hilarious performance.
Qrow himself gaped at how ridiculous his counterpart looked uncharacteristically acting like a Toon.
"What the hell are you doing, Qrow?" Taiyang said in between laughs.
"Maybe working for toons for so long finally drove him mad," Winter guessed, unable to refrain from laughing herself.
"No. I see what he's doing," Maria said with a knowing grin.
Qrow then began doing backflips. The weasels started laughing once more at his shenanigans.
"He's lost his mind," Glynda sighed.
"I don't think so," Ozpin disagreed, catching on to Qrow's plan.
"Oh, I get it now," Jaune said in realization. "He's going to make them die laughing."
"But will it work?" Saphron questioned.
Qrow then picked up a set of weights and started dancing with them.
"This singing ain't my line. It's tough to make a rhyme"
"If I get stuck, I'm outta luck... uhh, uhh..." Qrow struggled to find another rhyme.
"I'm running out of time!" Glynda shouted urgently.
"Thanks."
Winter kept laughing while pointing at Qrow. "You look so ridiculous," she said, wishing Ironwood was present to watch.
Qrow growled at Winter, angrily clutching his flask in his hand.
Qrow juggled the weights into the air and then let them fall on his head one by one.
Qrow staggered backwards in a daze and slipped on a banana peel and fell backwards into some boxes.
"Careful Uncle Qrow. If you knock yourself out, Ozpin and Glynda are finished," Yang warned.
"And so is Toontown," Ruby added.
The Weasel's laugher became louder and more hysterical.
Qrow emerged from the boxes bouncing around on a pogo stick. He launched himself so high that his head hit an overhanging light, and he was subsequently electrocuted.
Another round of laughter echoed throughout the theater.
Qrow groaned in humiliation as he buried his face in his hands. "Thank the Brothers that Jimmy's not here," he muttered.
Stupid laughed so much that he keeled over and he held up a flower. A green toon ghost with wings, a harp and halo left his body.
"Yes! It's working!" Maria cheered at the success of Qrows plan.
"Oh wow. They really can die from laughing," Kali said in surprise.
"And this makeshift routine is the only way to make it happen," Ghira added.
Wheezy was the next to die laughing. He tried desperately to pull his ghost back but failed.
"Hey Qrow! Keep it up! You're killing them! You're slaying them! You're knocking them dead!" Ozpin cheered in encouragement.
Unfortunately, the ladder Wheezy was standing on fell over and hit a lever, activating a conveyer belt carrying a vase.
"I'm through with taking falls. I'm bouncing off the walls"
"Without that gun, I'd have some fun. I'd kick you in the…"
The vase on the conveyer belt fell from above and shattered on Qrow's head.
"Nose!" Ozpin supplied a rhyme.
Weiss cocked her brow. "Huh? That doesn't rhyme."
"Nose? That don't rhyme with walls," Smart-Ass corrected.
"No! But this does," Qrow shot back.
Qrow kicked Smart Ass in the groin, launching him through the air and landing in the vat of Dip with a scream as he disintegrated.
"Oooooh!" the male audience groaned as they covered their own nether regions.
"Ha! Balls!" Yang laughed at the joke.
"Now that's one Toon who deserved to be dipped," Nora declared, since Smartass went along with Tyrian's plan.
Only Psycho and Greasy remained and they found Smart Ass's death hysterical. So much that Greasy died and his ghost floated away. Unfortunately, his death released the clutch on the Dip vehicle and it tilted forward slowly.
"Are the weasels actually dead, or just putting on an act?" Oscar wondered aloud.
"Well, Smart-Ass certainly isn't coming back," Ren observed, noticing the weasel's ghost didn't appear after being dipped.
"Either way, they'll be removed as a threat," Glynda noted, relieved there was still hope for the heroes.
Psycho on the other hand flailed his arms in hysterics, accidentally hitting a lever that turned the Dip cannon on. It hit the wall only a few feet away from Ozpin and Glynda and began to inch closer.
"Oh my goodness!" Glynda cried in alarm.
"Qrow has to wrap up this impromptu musical or they're done for," Taiyang said.
"Along with all the other toons," Ruby added, praying that Tyrian's plan would be foiled.
Luckily, Psycho hit another lever, which diverted the stream of Dip away from the Toon couple, narrowly missing them.
"Jeepers! That was close," Ozpin said.
Psycho laughed so hard that he lost his balance and fell off the cannon onto the dip coated brush on the front.
As Psycho's ghost floated away, he approached the Dip cannon and pulled a lever that rotated it back towards Ozpin and Glynda.
"Bye bye!" Psycho giggled before departing.
"Qrow hurry! It's coming back!" Ozpin pleaded as the Dip inched closer.
"Oh no! This is it!" Glynda added with fear.
Glynda clenched her armrests. "Hurry, Qrow," she whispered pleadingly.
Qrow quickly climbed up the Dip machine and turned the cannon away. "This isn't it!" he declared.
Suddenly, Tyrian appeared from above. He slid down a wire and struck Qrow, knocking him to the ground.
Tyrian jumped down from the Dip machine and drew a sword from his cane while Qrow got to his feet.
"Now it's your turn Tyrian," Taiyang said with a smile.
"Get him, Uncle Qrow!" Ruby cheered.
"Yeah! Break that turn murdering creeps legs!" Nora hollered, eager to see Tyrian go down.
Qrow opened a box next to him labelled singing swords. He waved it at Tyrian, but it morphed into a bendy toon form that indeed began to sing a swing song in a crooning voice.
"Wicked Witchcraft, And although I know, It's strictly taboo when-"
Qrow threw the useless sword away while Tyrian smiled in amusement.
Yang, Nora, and Jaune couldn't help but laugh at the singing sword.
"Well, that didn't work so well," Taiyang said flatly, unamused by the toon sword
"That sword did have a nice singing voice, though," Weiss complimented.
Qrow quickly opened another box. Inside was a large toon magnet. Qrow aimed it at Tyrian in an attempt to rob him of his sword.
"Nice thinking to disarm him," Oscar complimented.
Thinking fast, Tyrian used the magnetism to pull himself towards Qrow to impale him. Qrow pointed the magnet away to break the contact. Unfortunately, the powerful magnetism then yanked a barrel from behind Qrow, pinning him between the two objects.
Tyrian sheathed his sword. "Don't move."
"What's he gonna do now?" Oscar asked worriedly.
"Perhaps force him to watch Glynda and I die. The sadistic cretin," Ozpin snarled.
The Dip machine slowly but surely lurched towards Ozpin and Glynda. The stream of Dip inched closer towards them along the wall.
Tyrian hopped behind the wheel of a steamroller, intending to flatten Qrow with it.
"Oh, hell no!" Qrow whispered with fear.
"Why didn't he just stab him?" Nora wondered aloud.
"Typical villain stupidity in movies," Ren answered, having seen it plenty of times.
Qrow struggled to escape as the steamroller approached. He spotted boxes of black holes to his right. He kicked one of the boxes close enough for him to reach, tear open, and place the Port product over the magnet to create a gap and slip out only a split second before being crushed to death.
"Nice one. Using Port's gag products to escape," Taiyang complimented.
"Lucky for me they were close by," Qrow said with relief.
Qrow climbed atop the steamroller and kicked Tyrian in the face, knocking him off the steamroller. Qrow then hopped off the steamroller as the judge got to his feet. Qrow threw a punch, but Tyrian dodged it, grabbed his wrist, and threw him across the room.
"Jeez. He's stronger than he looks," Qrow admitted.
"I didn't think he'd be this tough," Ruby agreed as she ate from a cup of strawberries.
"Hmmm..." Ozpin pondered with a hum, still unsure if Tyrian was really human in this universe.
Tyrian looked behind him as the now loose steamroller turned around and headed back towards them. Qrow picked up a can of "Extra Sticky Glue". He tried to hit Tyrian with it, but the judge caught it and delivered a swift kick to Qrow's chest, knocking him towards the approaching steamroller.
Tyrian threw a punch at Qrow, but the detective blocked it with the can of glue and Tyrian's fist punctured it. He shook off the can and tried to punch Qrow again but missed. His fist instead impacted the steamroller's wheel.
"Well that's a sticky situation," Yang giggled while everybody else groaned at her pun.
"Oh man...this is gonna be messy," Oscar said, realizing what was going to happen to Tyrian.
"And satisfying," Nora said as she excitedly munched on a slice of pancake.
Tyrian struggled wrench himself from the steamroller, but he accidentally stepped in a pool of the glue leaking from the can on the floor.
Meanwhile the Dip machine was getting closer to Ozpin and Glynda. With Tyrian now trapped, Qrow rushed over to rescue them.
"Oh no!" Glynda fretted as she struggled to free herself.
Tyrian grunted with frustration as he planted his foot onto the steamroller, unaware it was covered with glue. He pulled his hand free but couldn't do the same with his foot.
"Come on Qrow. Quit playing around! Pl-pl-pl-ease!" Ozpin begged frantically.
"Hurry, you fool! Help them!" Glynda called out.
Qrow opened the cab to the Dip machine and shut off the engine, ending the corrosive spray just as it was only a few feet away from the Toon couple.
"Hoo hoo! I wasn't worried. Were you?" Ozpin boldly asked Glynda.
Behind Qrow, Tyrian screamed as the steamroller began to crush him foot first. He continued screaming and squirming as the machine slowly rolled over him, squashing him into a black pancake.
Everyone looked disturbed by Tyrians apparent death, even though he was a villain.
"Now that's what I call a crushing defeat," Taiyang chuckled, eliciting groans throughout the theater.
"You did good taking him out, Uncle Qrow," Yang complimented her uncle.
"Wait... why isn't there any blood?" Ghira asked, expecting such a death to be more gruesome.
"Qrow, look!" Ozpin cried as he pointed at Tyrian with his ear.
Qrow shot a look back as the steamroller rolled over, revealing Tyrian's flattened body as it curled up. Then his whole flattened body peeled itself off the floor and wobbled on his feet.
Everyone stared at the screen in bewilderment, not initially comprehending.
"What the hell? How is he still alive?!" Qrow shouted in amazement.
"It can't be," Weiss whispered in disbelief as the only possible explanation crossed her mind.
"Tyrian is a...a..." Glynda began but couldn't finish her sentence out of sheer shock.
"Holy smoke! He's a toon!" Qrow shouted in astonishment.
Tyrian turned to Qrow. "Surprised?"
"I am," Jaune said flatly, prompting nods from a few other audience members.
"I knew in the back of my head it was quite possible," Ozpin said internally to Oscar, who nodded slowly.
"All this time. I knew he was hiding something," Ren said, remembering subtle signs in previous scenes that indicated Tyrian was a toon.
"He did always seem robotic in his movements," Winter observed. "As if he was trying a bit to hard to appear human."
"I'm more surprised that he's trying to wipe out his own kind for personal gain," Blake said venomously.
"Indeed. The despicable bastard!" Kali snarled with narrowed eyes.
"Not really. That lame-brained freeway idea could only be cooked up by a toon," Qrow replied, believing such a notion was ridiculous.
"Not just any toon," Tyrian said as he staggered towards a gas cylinder.
Suddenly, the movie paused.
"Hmm? What's happening?" Jaune asked curiously.
"Terra, take Adrien out of the theater," Gold-Sith instructed.
Terra arched her brow. "What? Why?"
"Because I don't want him to see this next part, that's why. And trust me, you don't want him to either," Gold-Sith implored. (1)
Terra glanced at Saphron, and the former nodded. Terra carried little Adrien out of the theater.
The movie resumed as Tyrian reached the gas tank and re-inflated himself. As he did so, his hat flew off and a pair of fake eyes popped out and clattered to the floor.
Tyrian then turned menacingly towards Qrow, showing his burning red, toon eyes.
Nora put a hand to her mouth. "Oh my Oum!"
"Wait? Red eyes…does that mean...?" Ren began before his eyes widened in realization.
Yang gasped sharply as the realization hit her. "Oh no... it's him!"
"I can't believe it. All this time..." Taiyang whispered, shaking his head as he realized Tyrian's true identity.
Qrow gasped, his body going rigid with terror as he recognized the Toon's eyes from his tragic past.
"Remember me, Qrow?" Tyrian asked, his voice shifting to a terrifying and increasingly high-pitched screech. "When I killed your sister, I talked! Just! Like! THIIIIIIIIIISSS!"
Ruby shrieked and clasped onto Yang's arm, the latter gaping at the screen with eyes as wide as dinner plates.
"That's no toon…that's a fucking demon!" Nora exclaimed as she and Ren hugged each other for comfort, both of their lips quivering.
Zwei whined sharply as he jumped out of Taiyang's lap and cowered under his seat.
Weiss put her hands over her mouth in shock while Blake winced, her ears flattening in discomfort from Tyrian's ear-piercing scream.
"He's more frightening than the Grimm!" Saphron said in a shaky tone, grateful that Gold-Sith took Adrien away to avoid seeing something so nightmarish.
Jaune and Oscar both gripped their armrests tightly as they leaned back in their seats, their frightened eyes glued to screen. They both barely avoided wetting themselves.
Even the adults were disturbed by Tyrian's reveal.
Maria's cybernetic eyes filled the lens completely.
Taiyang trembled with fear and anger at Raven's killer, hoping Qrow would kill him.
Glynda's mouth hung open as she shuddered briefly at Tyrian's bone-chilling scream.
Winter gaped and leaned back in her seat, more off put by Tyrian than the Grimm.
Kali inhaled sharply as she clutched Ghira's hand. Her husband barely noticed as he stared at the screen in slack jawed shock. And like their daughter, they winced at the ear-splitting pitch Tyrian's voice.
"Now that's fucked up..." Qrow muttered, his expression matching that of his counterpart.
Qrow backed away in wide-eyed horror while Tyrian's eyes turned to red-tipped daggers.
Qrow turned to run away, but Tyrian leaped after him with the aid of yellow toon springs protruding from his feet. He quickly caught up to Qrow, spun him around, lifted him up, and threw him to the ground.
"Jumping jeepers!" Ozpin exclaimed at Tyrians revelation.
After knocking Valiant down, Tyrian reached inside the Dip machine and re-activated it, turning the Dip spray back on.
"Well, things have just gone from bad to worse," Oscar commented anxiously.
"All this time, Raven's killer was right under my nose," Qrow said, ashamed that Judge Tyrian tricked him with his disguise.
"It explains how he bought the judicial election and rose to power in the first place," Winter added, remembering the bank robbery from Qrow's backstory.
"Oh my goodness! Oh no!" Glynda cried as the deadly Dip moved towards her and Ozpin.
Qrow got to his feet as Tyrian pulled off his right glove to reveal a big yellow anvil for a hand.
Tyrian struck Qrow with the anvil and sent him flying across the factory floor. Qrow slid to a stop, barely staying conscious.
"Oooooh!" everyone winced at the blow Qrow just took.
Taiyang flinched. "That's gotta hurt," he muttered.
Zwei continued hiding under Taeyang's seat, whimpering.
Tyrian then covertly changed the anvil hand into a huge buzz saw on the end of an extendable arm.
Qrow swallowed hard. "Oh man..." he muttered in fear.
"Please no," Ruby said in a wavering voice, not wanting to see her uncle die.
"No. Don't let him get you too," Taiyang fretted.
Qrow watched as Tyrian showboated by cutting through some thick chains with the buzzsaw. He then stalked towards Qrow, extending the spinning buzzsaw closer and closer.
"How the hell am I supposed to fight him?!" Qrow questioned frantically, knowing full well Toons were nigh-invulnerable.
"The only way to stop him is with Dip," Weiss pointed out.
"Easier said than done," Glynda said, knowing Qrow would be hard-pressed to use the Dip against Tyrian.
Qrow shot a look to his right and spotted a Toon boxing glove mallet. He then looked back at Tyrian as the buzzsaw was only a few feet away. The crazed toon sported a slasher smile and his eyes spun like pinwheels.
"My Oum...that's so creepy!" Nora cried as she continued holding onto Ren's arm.
"This is going to give me nightmares for sure," Ruby whimpered, feeling she spoke for everyone in the theater.
"You said it," Ren agreed with his partner with a nod.
"He's as crazy as the real Tyrian," Jaune commented.
Tyrian jabbed the buzzsaw at Qrow, who barely rolled out of the way.
Qrow grabbed the mallet while Tyrian tried for another buzzsaw jab that Qrow narrowly dodged as it struck a table. Qrow aimed the mallet and launched the boxing glove, but Tyrian dodged it.
The glove however struck a lever on the Dip machine, reversing the streams direction towards him.
"Huh?!" Tyrian muttered as he stared in befuddlement.
The spray of Dip jetted towards Tyrian, who screamed in wide-eyed terror as the torrent hit him and sent him flying across the room.
"Yeah!" Ruby, Nora, and Jaune all hollered at Qrow's victory.
"Hoist by his own petard," Glynda noted the irony in Tyrion being killed by his own Dip.
The stream of Dip was now perilously close to Ozpin and Glynda.
"Goodbye my darling! Good bye!" Glynda cried, thinking it was all over.
Just then, the amount of Dip in the machine finally ran out and the jet petered down. The tank had run empty in the nick of time.
"Oh! I think, I'm going to faint," Glynda panted.
"I'd probably faint myself after an ordeal like that," Glynda agreed with her counterpart.
Qrow got to his feet and watched Tyrian as he stood in a pool of his own concoction, whooping and screaming.
"Oooohhh nooo! I'm mel-el-el-elting!" Tyrian screeched as he slowly dissolved feet first. "I'm melting! Melting!"
Finally, the screaming stopped as Judge Tyrian vanished in a noxious cloud of yellow smoke.
Everyone was visibly freaked out by Tyrian's death. As well-deserved as his death was, anyone would be disturbed to watch someone slowly dissolve in a cloud of yellow smoke while screaming like a banshee.
"Now he knows how that poor little shoe felt before it died," Nora noted with a look of discomfort.
"That was for Raven, you bastard," Taiyang said under his breath.
Unfortunately, the Dip machine was still lurching steadily towards Ozpin and Glynda.
"Hurry up Qrow! Do something!" Ozpin cried in a panic.
Qrow rushed over to the control pad for the crane hook and pressed a button. Ozpin and Glynda shifted aside out of the Dip machines path. It smashed through the factory wall and was struck by an oncoming train in toon town.
"It's finally over," Nora sighed with relief as the Dip machine was destroyed.
Just then, Terra re-entered the theater with Adrien in her arms. She sat back down beside Saphron. "What did we miss?"
"I'll tell you later," Saphron replied, knowing she would never allow her son to watch Tyrian's horrifying reveal.
"Qrow! There's dip everywhere! How are we gonna get down?" Ozpin called out as he and Glynda hovered in the air from the hook.
Qrow ran to a nearby valve and turned it. All around the factory, fire hydrants burst open, the gushing water washing the Dip down the drains.
"It's all gone," Weiss said with relief.
"Let's just pray nobody else knows the formula to creating Dip," Winter said hopefully.
Qrow untied the Toon couple and helped them down.
"Jeepers Qrow! That was a close shave. I thought for sure our goose was cooked!" Ozpin said with relief.
"Oh! My hero," Glynda purred as she walked past Qrow and embraced Ozpin. "Oh honey bunny."
"Oh, love cup," Ozpin cooed.
"Oh Ozpin. You were a pillar of strength," Glynda praised and showered Ozpin with kisses, much to Qrow's consternation.
"Him?! What fight was she watching?" Qrow said in outrage.
"As if I'd ever kiss you," Glynda scoffed.
Just then, Benny and the police arrived at the scene through he factory doors.
"Sister Mary Francis! What the hell happened in here?" Benny asked as he shined his headlights on Tyrian's remains smoldering on the floor.
"Oh, now they arrive," Qrow complained while throwing his hands up. "It would have been nice if Jimmy showed up a minute or two earlier."
"Oh, don't be a whiner. You handled it yourself pretty well," Taiyang brushed off.
"Barely," Qrow countered as he took a sip from his flask.
Toons began to peer inside the factory through the hole in the wall.
"I've been a cab for 37 years and I've never seen a mess like this," Benny exclaimed.
Winter accompanied the police. "What was that? A rubber mask?" she asked, looking down at Tyrian's remains.
"And fake eyes," Oscar added.
"Clever disguise," Weiss admitted.
"It explains how he stayed hidden for so long after that fateful bank robbery five years back," Maria said, remembering Qrow's story in the movie theater.
"Like a Grimm disguised as a human," Jaune noted with a shiver.
"I pray Salem never tries something like that," Ozpin said worriedly.
"Yeah. And this is the rope from the safe that was dropped on Port," Qrow said as he tossed the aforementioned rope to Ironwood. "I think your lab boys will find that paint's a perfect match."
"Judge Tyrian killed Peter Port," Ironwood said in disbelief.
"And Jacque Schnee... and my sister," Qrow added solemnly while Winter took his hand in comfort.
"That's what I call one seriously disturbed toon," Ironwood remarked.
"That's putting it mildly," Ruby said.
"A bat-shit monster would be a better description," Yang stated, prompting nods from everyone else.
"Whoever drew Tyrian must have been as psychotic as he was," Glynda commented, unsettled to even imagine who could create such a malevolent toon.
From the hole in the wall, dozens of toons from throughout Toontown entered the factory and crowded around Tyrian's smoldering remains. Among the most familiar of them was a black and white female cat with a bow.
"Look, Blake. There's you as a Toon," Yang pointed out as she, Ruby, and Weiss giggled.
Blake looked taken aback. "I didn't see that coming," she said.
"Awww, look at our little Blakey as a toon," Kali cooed while Ghira nodded with a warm smile.
"Gosh, uh! I wonder who he really was," Coco said curiously.
"That's actually a good question," Oscar agreed with Coco's counterpart.
"Frankly, I don't want to find out," Jaune said flatly.
"He had anvils and buzzsaws for hands. Monty only knows what the rest of his body looked like," Taiyang added.
"I'll tell you that one thing Doc," Velvet said with a carrot in hand. "He weren't no rabbit!"
"Or a duck!" Neptune added.
"Or a dog," Jaune with a distinctive chuckle.
Saphron, Nora, Adrien, and Ren all laughed at Jaune's goofy counterpart while the blonde knight pouted in embarrassment.
"Or a little wooden girl," Penny said pointing to herself.
"Penny..." Ruby said sadly, having missed her friend dearly.
Yang frowned at her sister's sorrow and gently placed her hand over Ruby's for comfort.
"Or a sheep," a Toon wolf said as he slipped out of his disguise.
"Or a woodpecker," a blue woodpecker with a red crest said.
"Or a pussy," Blake sputtered with a noticeable lisp.
Everyone laughed at the screen except for Blake, who looked irked.
"What's that?" Winter asked, pointing at Qrow's shirt.
Qrow glanced down and saw a blue ink stain on his shirt. "It's ink. That goof Port squirted me with some the other night," he answered. "But why it's coming out now I don't know."
"So, he still ruined my shirt," Qrow said, a bit peeved.
Ozpin held up a bottle from a nearby box. "Here's your answer Qrow! Port's disappearing-reappearing ink!"
"Boy, that Port. What a genius!" Ozpin praised the late Peter.
"Apple sauce," Baby Roman scoffed with a cigar in hand. "If he was such a genius, why didn't he leave his will where we could find it? Without it, we're just waiting for another developer's wrecking ball."
"That's true. We still don't know where the will is?" Ruby said with concern.
Qrow realized something. He reached into his pocket and pulled out Ozpin's love letter. "Ozpin," Qrow beckoned.
"Yeah?" Ozpin replied.
"Ozpin that love letter that you wrote to your wife in the Ink and Paint Club. Why don't you read it to her now?" Qrow suggested.
"Sure Qrow," Ozpin agreed as he began to read: "Dear Glynda. How do I love thee. Let me count the ways..."
Writing began to appear on the letter, which Ozpin stumbled into as he read on.
"I, Peter Port? Of sound mind and body?" Ozpin began to read. "It's the will!"
"They had it the whole time?"
"Ah! So, he wrote it in that special ink keep it secret and safe from Tyrian and his flunkies," Glynda realized.
"Smart move. Otherwise, they would have found it for sure," Maria noted as she sipped a cup of tea.
"Keep reading," Glynda urged her husband.
"Do hereby bequeath in perpetuity the property known as Toontown to those loveable characters, the toons!" Ozpin finished and began to laugh jubilantly while Glynda hugged him from behind with a smile. All the other Toons cheered.
"He may have been a total loon, but Port truly cared for the Toons after all," Maria pointed out.
"And he made the right move refusing to sell Toontown to Tyrian," Kali added with a smile.
"Too bad it got him killed when Tyrian decided to do things his way," Glynda lamented on the loss of Peter.
Qrow and Winter smiled and locked eyes. They moved in for a kiss, but Ozpin pulled Qrow away by the arm.
"Oh no, not again!" Winter groaned.
"Hey, Qrow. That was a pretty funny dance you did for the weasels," . "Do you think your days of being a sourpuss are over?
"Only time will tell," Qrow answered.
"Yeah, well, put it there, pal," Ozpin said as he offered his hand.
Qrow shook Ozpin's hand, then sputtered and shook from the old hand-buzzer gag. However, Qrow wasn't very pleased with the joke and all the toons became silent as he glared at Ozpin.
Qrow himself also looked irritated. "I've really had about enough of this clown," he snarled.
Ozpin gulped nervously. "Don't tell me you lost your sense of humor already," he asked.
Qrow grabbed Ozpin by the neck. "Does this answer your question?" he asked before giving Ozpin a big kiss.
Qrow's eye twitched as he stared in disgust at his counterpart onscreen. Everyone else burst out laughing.
"So, you do have a thing for rabbits after all," Taiyang said teasingly, while Qrow threateningly raised a fist to shut his brother-in-law up.
"Well... at least his former self has returned," Ozpin said awkwardly, disgusted by the scene.
Ozpin wiped his lips in disgust but then laughed, knowing Qrow's humorous former self was back. The other toons all cheered again.
"Come on Ozpin. Let's go home. I'll bake you a carrot cake," Glynda in a sultry tone, much to Ozpin's delight.
All the gathered Toons began to dance and sing Toontown's theme song.
"Smile, Darn ya smile."
"You know this old world Is a great world after all."
Nora, Ruby, Jaune, Oscar, and Saphron all gleefully sang along. Everyone else smiled and swayed to the music.
Ozpin, Glynda, Qrow and Winter started walking toward Toontown through the hole in the wall as the singing Toons made way for them.
"Smile, Darn ya smile.
And right away Watch Lady Luck Pay you a call"
"Things are never black As they are painted"
"Time for you and joy To get acquainted"
"Make life worthwhile"
"So, Smile, Darn you smile!"
A group of Toon cops stepped into view to clear the scene. One of them was a pig.
"O.K. Mova-mova-Move-along," the pig stuttered. "Th-th-there's nothing else to see. That's all folks."
"Ha! A pig playing a cop," Yang laughed, getting the joke.
"That's a clever one," Taiyang agreed with his daughter.
"Hmmmm... I like th-the sound of that," Porky said as he turned towards the camera, holding back a closing black iris. "Th-th-th-that's all folks!"
Just then, a white-haired fairy in a blue dress fluttered up to Porky. With a flick from her magic wand, Porky vanished, and she flew off.
Weiss blinked in surprise. "Was that me as a fairy?" she asked.
"D'aaaw. Little Weiss as an Ice Fairy," Yang cooed teasingly.
"Quiet, you brute!" Weiss hissed.
"I think you looked cute, Weiss," Winter assured, earning a thankful smile from her sister..
With that, the movie ended, and the credits began to roll.
Everyone applauded the conclusion of the film. The overhead lights shined on and Gold-Sith's shimmering yellow image appeared on the screen.
"So, what did you think?" Gold-Sith asked with a smile.
"The ending was scary, but I loved it," Ruby said, still a little shaken up by Judge Tyrian's reveal.
"Me too. It was satisfying to see Tyrian get what he deserved," Nora said with a smirk.
"Let's hope our own version gets his just desserts as well," Ren added in agreement with his partner.
"I second that notion," Taiyang said, angry that the real Tyrian dared to attack Ruby.
"We loved it too," Saphron said, while Terra and Adrien nodded in agreement.
"It certainly had an interesting concept," Glynda said, referring to the mixture of toons and real people. "Although I'm still...ambivalent on my counterpart being a sex symbol."
"I'm not," Qrow said slyly under his breath.
Gold-Sith smiled. "I'm happy you all enjoyed it. My next viewing of the multiverse will be ready by tomorrow, but I expect all of you are tired and wish to retire for the night," he said.
Adrien yawned in Terra's lap, confirming Gold-Sith's claim. It was getting late, after all.
"I'll be busy taking care of Adrien at home tomorrow," Terra added as she stood up with Adrien in her arms.
"And regrettably, I won't be able to make it. I must continue my efforts in Vale," Glynda explained, referring to her attempts to restore Beacon Academy.
"I must report back to Atlas and assist General Ironwood," Winter notified before pulling out her invitation from her pocket. "I trust we can use these to return to our previous whereabouts?"
Gold-Sith nodded. "I understand some of you have commitments. And yes, Specialist Schnee. All you must do is speak the phrases on the invitations in a mirror five times, and you'll return to your previous locations. And I can always invite and transport other viewers if they so desire."
"Sounds good to me," Blake said, wondering if Sun would be up for another viewing.
"It'd be nice to see some familiar faces from past viewings," Weiss added with a smile, referring to Neptune.
"Well, then. I bid you all a good night. And I wish you the very best of luck in battling Salem," Gold-Sith bid his farewells with a bow of his head.
"Thanks. We'll be needing it," Oscar said with a hint of uncertainty.
With that, everyone departed from the theater and Gold-Sith's image vanished from the screen, leaving the theater darkened once more until the next film.
(1) I simply couldn't allow Adrien to watch Judge Tyrian's reveal. The poor kid would be traumatized for life. The regular audience members were scared enough as it is.
Author's Note: The next adaptation will be ready in a few weeks. Probably on the first anniversary of this story. I'll need to take time to prepare since I'm busier than I was the previous year.
I'm also making plans for a RWBY crossover fanfiction that I'm planning to release once Volume 9 comes out. Stay tuned my loyal readers and take care.