Garden of Order: VI
This entire situation was bizarre.
So far beyond bizarre that Mordred was struggling to come up with words for it, as if the weird Assassin was no longer her biggest concern.
No, that now went to her Master.
Who was leading the behemoth of some dragon woman around by the hand like she was some lost toddler. A sight that was outright pathetic for any Servant to accept, worse was how content they had been with it. No, to call it content would have been to say he was merely accepting.
He could not have gotten his hand on her fast enough to lead her around when the moment came.
If that wasn't bad enough, there was the way everyone reacted to that with very clear levels of worry or hostility.
Blonde ass was just looking like he was waiting for an excuse and wasn't trying to hide it, the fact Master hadn't noticed was some new height of ignorance and obliviousness. Or perhaps he had noticed and was just letting it happen and ignoring the potential time bomb that was sitting on everyones laps.
Then there was Shieldy.
Mordred had felt she'd gotten a decent enough grasp of the personality of the little girl to actually understand the look she was currently sending the boy. A strained expression that was decidedly uncomfortable. Staring at something that she was seriously disturbed but not having the guts to stand up and declare that what she was seeing was messed up.
And she was left with no context for any of it.
Her first thought was that this Servant had been a former enemy, it would explain so much and would have been a comfortable reason for why everyone was acting so jumpy or evasive to her presence.
Save for one slight problem.
The attitude of Master.
It was something she was growing increasingly tired of, she was no stranger to the expected codes of chivalry when it came to defending the helpless. She would have been fine if this was some regular ass woman they'd dragged out of that shithole and were leading around. That was fine.
Hell, she would have punched the guy who demanded they just leave her there.
But this was a Servant.
And not a weak one at that, Mordred could feel the strength radiating off her even at this range and this was nothing more than an Assassin. The class infamous for cowards who needed cheap tricks to win a fight. This woman was the sort of thing that would have needed one of the Round Table to put down if it had started a problem up in Camelot.
Purely because of her existence as some sort of dragon creature.
And that was without seeing her fight with eyes which were, apparently, similar enough to the rogue Assassin travelling with them.
The freaky eyes which sliced through her armour with nothing more than some damn butter knife.
And they were just fine with her being blinded and a liability?
Really?
Not a single person had suggested healing her eyes and she knew there were plenty in Chaldea who could have pulled that off except it seemed to slip the minds of everyone who was so inclined for one reason or another. She curled her lip and shook her head, adjusting her hold on Clarent and stomping forwards.
Accepting the assistance of a Servant was one thing.
This was something else.
"Oi, Master!"
Her voice carried far, the teenager jolted and then quickly turned around to face her, still leading the taller woman around by the hand. Her eyes lingered on the conjoined fingers before they glanced back at the boy, she jerked her head towards herself and continued on.
"Can I speak to you for a second?"
The alone went unsaid, but she made sure to keep her eyes on Priscilla for a couple more moments just to get it across. From the way he frowned ever so slightly and looked as if she had suggested something unpleasant, it told her he got the message. She glanced across to Shieldy and met her gaze, then waved a hand towards the pair.
"Won't take long. Shieldy or he can watch over them." Mordred paused for a moment before adding on, ensuring that she was making eye contact with the blonde ass. "She seems to be comfortable enough around him to get a little familiar."
The look he shot her now made all others pale in comparison.
Pure venom for a brief instant before it just vanished.
It was eerie how swiftly the emotion came to and left.
"Oh? Thou wish for a private discussion? I can abide by myself for a time. 'Tis not unfamiliar."
Mordred indicated to Priscilla in a pointed manner, though the way the Servant excused herself was rather juvenile, if she were to put it into words. The entire situation was becoming more and more bewildering to her and until she got context, she wasn't going to let it get any further than this.
And damn anyone who was going to give her some weak ass excuse over it.
Ritsuka exhaled and slowly pulled away from the dragon woman with no small amount of reluctance, approaching her with clear hesitance in his steps. The fact he didn't jerk his head around his body to make sure she hadn't vanished by the time he actually got to Mordred was something she considered to be a small miracle.
"Yes?"
"What are we doing with her?" She cut right to the point and if, by some weird turn of events, he did not get who she was speaking of, she raised her free hand and pointed over his shoulder towards the direction of the woman. "Because right now you're putting an awful lot of things at risk over what was a fairly simple mission, Master."
She lowered the arm, keeping her voice even.
"Explain it to me slowly."
Master frowned as if she might have said something out of place. "I don't think it's that big of a risk. She's blinded herself as is and if she was going to show violence, she probably would have done that by now…Besides, I'm fairly certain that the two of us have a contract at this point so-"
"Oh, a contract, huh?"
Hardly surprised by the development, she drawled out the words and tilted her head.
"So why is she still blind then? Big strong Servant like her could really help."
It was an answer she expected from Master, but it was the woman herself who answered for him in words which left nothing to the imagination.
"Mine eyes shall be kept apart from mine skull."
That was an admission with the intent of self-mutilation if she had ever heard it before, Mordred wordlessly raised an eyebrow and glanced over the top of the Master. Giving the Servant a look which they seemed to feel, at least if the slight fidget was any indication. Yet they did not waver from their stance, Mordred could at least grant them the fact they were a stubborn idiot. Though an idiot all the same.
Her eyes returned to the Master.
He held up a hand. "Leaving her where we found her wasn't a solution."
"Was it not? Worked well for that other knight, didn't it?"
His face soured quickly, eyes shifting as he searched for an answer. "...It isn't the same. Verndari at least has a contract with Chaldea if things fall through and I could trust her to defend herself if something were to go south. Priscilla tore out her own eyes over whatever was going on here…I think she's owed some answers as to why."
"Answer seems obvious to me." Mordred grunted, then stopped and shook her head. This was going to be an argument that would get them nowhere.
She could tell her Master was a bleeding heart, but that alone wasn't reason enough.
Not for whatever this display had been.
"You say she's got a contract with you?" She questioned, but did not wait for the expected answer and just ploughed forwards. "So she's just someone else that we have to protect now? Tough enough to do that with just you but now we have to play babysitter to this liability? Some Servant who has hamstrung themselves and won't accept any effort of healing and we just take her along?"
Leaning forwards, she brought up an arm and sharply jabbed a finger into the shoulder of the Master.
"Your orders, your commands. Explain to me why we're doing this."
Narrowing her eyes, she raised the finger up and pointed to his face.
"Because I'm going to need a good reason for it, Master. Especially since everyone else seems to be looking at this like a bomb about to blow."
"...Stuff happened."
Her arm dropped, she leaned back and stared at him.
"...Stuff happened." The words spilled from her as flat and toneless. Eyes searching his face for any sign of the fact he had just made the stupidest comment known to man. Something she would only expect from a man who had been kicked in the head by a mule. The lack of hoof prints on the side of the skull was the only evidence that hadn't happened. "You got anything more?"
Master grimaced, a face like he'd just brought up something unpleasant from his stomach to his mouth, then turned away. Raising a hand and pressing it flat against his nape, he rolled his jaw from side to side and - at last - closed his eyes and exhaled. Something dropped in his face, some form of resistance or hesitance.
"...Stuff happened in London." He mumbled, just loud enough for her to hear. "She died because of me so…"
Ah, so this was out of some sense of guilt?
Mordred nodded her head, partially satisfied with the answer and being reminded that her Master really was just some kid.
It made sense now.
"Alright, but that's just how Servants are." She rolled her shoulders. "That wasn't the first time one of your allies died, was it?"
A slow shake of the head.
Then he spoke again, with more firmness than before.
"But this was my fault."
It felt to her as if there was something more, but she wasn't quite sure he would give her any concrete answers. Her eyes narrowed ever so slightly on him, looking up and down before giving a single huff. At least she had a reason for it all now, not the best reason in the world but one she could at least have explained to her.
She stepped around him and grunted.
"Just saying. It would be better to try and convince her to get her eyes back…because if it comes down to you and her, I'm not gonna hesitate to protect you."
Because a Servant who did something like this was just asking for trouble.
And if her Master ordered her to protect the cripple, then she really would just smack him over the upside of the head and hope that brought some common sense to him. Otherwise she was saddled with some idiot.
The expression he made was some sort of pained grimace, but he did not look surprised by her words.
Resigned, would have been a better word, like the faces of those who knew they were bound for the headsman's axe. A grim acceptance of reality. Not something she expected when bringing up the common sense of protecting ones own master over a Servant, but that was just further proof that her Master really was just some kid.
An odd thing for her to come to terms with, she had to admit.
Instead she walked further past the boy and glanced briefly at the giant, stopping before them and gazing up at the blind woman, one whose senses seemed to extend beyond mere sight as her head turned, beholding Mordred with an eyeless stare and a tilt of the head, lips rolling as she searched for the words.
Mordred spared her the chore of digging for a sentence opener.
"If you're gonna be around, try not to slow us down." Stopping for a moment, she considered further words. "And if you try to pull any funny shit, I'm gonna kill you myself."
She ignored the stares and instead waited for the response of the crossbreed, that is if she would get one at all.
But it seemed that the big girl had some spine after all. "Thou speak as a knight. I pray thou uphold thy oath in such times. I shall not hast mine burden cause the end of thy liege-lords life."
Well, she got permission.
Mordred let out a content grunt and nodded her head, not that Priscilla could see, and turned away from the crippled woman and marched forwards further, meeting the eyes of the blonde ass and giving him a pointed look. Daring him to try and make another of his comments against her.
Instead he just looked at her strangely, like she was a puzzle that didn't quite fit together right.
Not that she gave a shit what he thought.
Ass.
He did not know whether or not that could be seen as a victory for himself or not.
At the very least, Mordred had come to understand a part of why he was keen on having Priscilla around and accepted it. In their own unique way, they accepted it. Though perhaps that was the best result he could have wished for out of her.
Not without further context.
But how could he even begin to explain it?
He could not and he would not.
"You're thinking I'm weird again, aren't you?"
It did not take long for the reply to meet his ears.
"I didn't say anything."
"Yeah." Ritsuka acquiesced, but then pressed onwards. "But you're thinking it, aren't you?"
Shiki let loose a small hum as she stepped up next to him, hands in her pockets once more and with a small sniff of the air, she nodded her head slowly, the movement serving as her only answer to him for the moment.
"...Are you bothered?"
"Why should I be?" She queried with a tilt of the head, Ritsuka supposed he should have been thankful for that. She truly sounded as though she did not care in the least whether he was taking Priscilla with them or not.
At least there was that.
"I'm not sure." He replied, it was merely something he had asked because he felt there should have been an answer for it.
Maybe it would have been an answer that didn't sit right with him, but he still wished to know what her opinion was.
They were working together after all.
"You seemed very incensed with Priscilla." It was something he noticed during her questioning, speaking more with the Assassin than she had done with anyone else he had seen. Or if that was not the case, speaking to her with more emotion than she had mustered for the others.
She walked past him and stopped for only a moment, her eyes looked back with a glimmer of thought swirling behind them. Debating the answer that she would have given him.
The silence ended when she offered a small shrug. "Just struck me as strange. Living as she did all those years and now she decides to pull out her eyes? It didn't add up to me so I just pointed it out. You probably could have done that as well if you'd thought about it long enough."
Perhaps she was right.
But that was not where his mind had been at the time.
"Maybe." He muttered, unconvinced with it but letting the comment stand without complaint. He turned once more on Priscilla and approached with quiet steps, she patiently waited for him until he stood before her once more. It was curious how she knew it was him from the way she reached out with her hand and waited for him.
He was wondering which of them was leading the other at this point.
A debate for another time, he took the hand and they walked once more, following in the path of the Servants before them. Mash slowing herself to walk by their side, he felt her eyes on the side of his head and the unspoken words on her lips. Probably caution or worry, maybe for himself or maybe for their situation.
What else could he say?
Who he was worried about was Ash.
And the sour looks that had been launched the way of Priscilla ever since they started their trek.
He was not expecting the Avenger to be pleased with the decision, both pragmatically and for personal reasons. As Mordred had said, he knew what he was doing was potentially risky if it came to blows with another Servant, this was something purely for the sake of his own heart.
And Ash had no love lost for Priscilla, that much he could see.
When the moment arose, he would let Ash vent his concerns in more detail, as they had done before.
Another chime heralded the communicator, he stopped only briefly and brought up his left arm, the screen flashed and the ghostly visage of the Director appeared before him, rather than that of Romani or another.
A grim countenance greeted him and he did not ignore the way her eyes were not meeting his own, instead they were aimed for the large figure at his side in a manner that was pointed and very uncomfortable.
"Something wrong?"
"...Not yet." The Director replied in a slow and deliberate manner, her eyes remained on Priscilla. "Merely asking what the intentions are with bringing Assassin with us? And whether you intend for us to Rayshift her back along with you when this distortion is resolved?"
Ritsuka found himself blinking at the words.
Not because they were surprising or shocking, but because he did not have an immediate answer.
"Just…" He stopped and rolled his jaw, looking around for a moment and trying to avoid the eyes.
What could he say?
"...Just felt like it."
An utterance and a faint shrug of the shoulders, he felt more like a small child in this moment than anything else.
Olga watched him without her face giving away anything, rather it seemed she waited for an elaboration. Yet that was all he found himself comfortable in saying aloud. It was an honest answer, it was something he felt like.
"Wasn't going to leave her alone and was going to offer the choice."
Very slowly, the Director raised a brow and then closed her eyes. "Have you asked her yet?"
No.
He had not.
He turned and looked up at the face of the Assassin, she 'looked' on only with a tiny smile on her lips, a contentedness in her face. Evidently unconcerned with the conversation taking place before he, despite the fact it directly related to what would happen to her. He had not asked her that yet because he feared what her answer was.
…What if she said no?
"Priscilla…" He began slowly, wetting his lips as his throat ran rather dry. "...Do you want to come with us to Chaldea-?"
"Ritsuka."
The bluntness that his name was spoken with caught him by surprise, his head turned towards the speaker.
Ash faced him with a face that showed not even an ounce of emotion, rather he stood straight, arms held at his side. His head jerked slightly towards himself and then he turned. "Might I have a moment to speak with you?"
Even if it was phrased as a question, it did not sound as such.
But he nodded his head, turning to Mash and offering her a small smile. "Can you just stay with Priscilla for a little bit? I'll be right back."
She did not reply with words, but nodded her head all the same and stepped into his place as he moved away from Priscilla. She released his hands with no hesitancy about it, the same lack of hesitance with which she had held it in the first place.
Ritsuka paced forwards, striding past Mordred as he did so.
A scowl etched on her face directed for the Avenger and the clear disapproval of his words, but he held up a hand and smiled lightly. It did not put anything to rest with her, but it indicated that he was fine going by himself.
And really, he was fine they were going to talk about this so soon.
Mash stood by the side of Priscilla and found her eyes drawn towards the face of the woman, it was something she truly should not have been staring at and if she had been caught, she would have apologised profusely.
But it was difficult not to stare at it.
The mere thought that someone could just…mutilate themselves in such a manner turned her stomach.
Doing that and following through with it and then refusing the help that would grow the eyes because…she didn't understand it.
But perhaps that was the point, she didn't want to be in a position where she could contemplate something so horrible.
Warmth nestled against her cheek, she pivoted her head and brought up her free hand, running her fingers along the length of Fou's ears back and forth. The little white animal hummed with what she assumed was content, given that they did not recoil away from her hold. It was something grounding, at least, and she found comfort in the action.
It pulled her eyes away from Priscilla for a moment.
But she found her mind slowly being pulled back to the words of the Director, more so as she eyed the form of Senpai meeting with Ash a good distance from them. The two of them stood and engaged in a conversation that she wished she had been privy to.
But it was a private matter.'
…And it was something that Ash-san needed to be addressed.
But perhaps she worried for it as well, not only for the sake of Priscilla, but for Senpai as well.
Mash wasn't a fool.
She could see why he was eager to bring the Assassin along, there was a desperation in his actions. The only thing that she could think of was when she lay beneath rubble and just wanted someone to hold her hand. That lone act of comfort to cement her into the world was all she needed.
Senpai was craving something like that, she was sure of it.
Her eyes drifted to the Assassin once more and she rolled her lips, biting at her lower one and halting her strokes along the fur of Fou.
It should have been fine, something that she should be content with.
Senpai was happy, so why did she feel so ill when she looked at him walking beside Priscilla? Why did she see that face of comfort and think it was wrong somehow. She was unsure about why that was.
"Might I bid thou a question?"
There was a short pause as she realised that Priscilla was actually talking to her, Mash turned and looked up at the taller woman. Then nodded her head once before she could catch herself. A flush of shame and embarrassment welled up within her, heat spread over her cheeks before she spoke.
"Of course." Despite her misgivings, she did not hold any personal problems with Priscilla.
Merely what the situation was doing with Senpai.
"Are thou uncomfortable with mine presence?"
She blinked once.
Then twice.
"O-oh! No, I…" Mash trailed off, words failing her as she tried to think of something to say that didn't leave the taller woman with the impression that she objected to her. "That isn't what…I do not have any problem with you, Priscilla-san. It's just that I'm concerned about Senpai, that is all-"
"Because he clings to me as a parent doth its newborn?"
Mash closed her mouth.
She wouldn't know anything about that though, so she could not say.
"Is that…" Wetting her lips, she looked away for a moment. "Is that how it is?"
"I speak only of the tales told to me, it is something I hast never been graced."
That sounded rather sad to be said aloud, Mash shifted uncomfortable with the way the Assassin spoke of it. As though there was nothing wrong with her situation. Then again, she had just thought the same thing without really giving much thought to it either.
Perhaps the closest she could have gotten was the times that doctor Romani never left her room after the…incident.
He would sometimes fall asleep slumped over her bed because of it.
"It troubles thou to see him as such, doth it not?"
Another sentence plunged into her and drew out a flinch, the aim was true and Mash found herself on the backfoot. Rather surprised as to how someone who did not even have eyes could read her so openly. Back and forth she wavered on her feet before she wet her lips once more, now drier and drier, and glanced at the woman.
"Mmmmh."
It was a small hum in the back of her throat, even confessing it aloud felt wrong.
But it was how she felt.
Quickly she came up with an excuse. "I'm just worried that Senpai doesn't think about himself as often as he does about other people-"
"Mine presence endues him peace. 'Tis why I followed." Priscilla cut her short with a gentle whisper and a tilt of the head, "And…I sensed within him something so familiar and yet so strange…for a instant. the lone word of 'father' was all that I could regard of when I felt his touch."
Mash froze up on the spot.
It was something she had thought she imagined, even Senpai's reaction hadn't clicked with her until now.
She felt ill, like something was building up in the depths of her throat and eager to spill out. Be it words or something else.
"Yet I hast never known such a figure. Hence this might well be mine own selfish desire to embrace this feeling yet if it endues only pain, I set aside mine desires for thou."
What could she say to this string of words?
Each one brought more conflicting emotions than the last, her jaw rolled from side to side and her fingers once more graced the fur of Fou. Moving back and forth a bit swifter, as though the action itself could steal away some of that comfort he clothed himself with and use it for herself.
In the end, it just made Fou press a paw against her cheek and halt her motion.
A stray glance for the furred animal rewarded her with a long and unblinking stare. One that beheld a great deal of intelligence.
As if Fou had looked right through what she was doing.
Slowly, her fingers retracted.
"I…" Mash began, then stopped and dropped her head down.
Something dropped down atop her head and moved back and forth, sliding between the lockes of her hair. For a moment, she was left dumbfounded until she raised her head up, shifting whatever was atop her. Priscilla gazed down as best she could, having awkwardly placed a hand down onto her head and rubbed at it.
She blinked, trying to understand what was going on.
"What is thy name?"
The request was so gentle that she answered without hesitation.
"Mash Kyrielight."
"Hmmm~" The petting stopped and the hand slid further down, moving around her face and cupping her cheek. "Thou are a childlike soul. To stand blind before thou is a gift."
She was thankful to be blind?
"But-"
"No. I'd not spoil thy visage with tainted threads." Firmness crept into the words for but a moment then receded away, the smile never left the lips of the Assassin. A lone thumb rubbed along her cheeks back and forth. "Mash. I shall bear thy concerns true to mine most Soul. I shall see to it that thy friend is not left clinging to me before he leaves."
It was something that she felt relief with, but it was a relief that quickly soured when she realised what that might mean.
"Senpai…he wants you to come back to Chaldea, o-or I mean he will want you to."
"I know."
Mash shifted. "Do you…want to?"
The smile was sadder, resigned almost. "I would be of little help to thee, I am afraid."
That wasn't an answer to her question.
Perhaps sensing that, the woman let out a sigh and pulled the hand away from her face, folding it back together with her other one.
"Tis never a matter of my wants. Rarely have they held weight to me…tis only what is and what shall be. I'm torn in truth. Which would be cruller? To pull out that which your friend has anchored around or to let it fester and grant him ill-conceived respite?"
"I…don't know…"
"Neither do I." Priscilla admittedly openly. "Perhaps in time we shall both be elucidated. Yet until it arrives, we must contend with our ignorance. Though I shall speak of this…t'would warm my heart if you had need of me in other matters…but I know now how mine mind has been twisted, thus I can give thou no sure answer."
That made sense at least, something Mash could understand.
"Alright…" Mash slowly nodded her head. "I think you should let Senpai know."
"Mmmmh…what is he like?"
"Senpai? He's-"
"Ah." Priscilla made a small sound, almost like a laugh. "Not he. I meant my brother."
Mash froze once more. "...You…know?"
"I need not my eyes to see our relation." A pause, then a quieter mutter. "Or feel his scorn. Do not offer pity, tis something I am well accustomed to I should think. It was not through love that I found myself sequestered to the cold lands of Ariamis, I should think."
Mash could not even lie to her.
Ash didn't like Priscilla, even she could see that.
And she wasn't comfortable with how accepting Priscilla was of that.
There was something sad about that, to have someone's own family dislike them.
Her head turned towards the blonde on instinct, still engaged in some conversation with Senpai.
Slowly, she focused her mind and turned back on Priscilla. "He likes to bake bread."
A flash of surprise crossed Priscilla's face, then an earnest smile as she leaned forwards, clearly eager to hear more.
"Why don't you approve?"
Ash needn't have said a single word, as the second Ritsuka approached and was within range words, those were the first he used.
Either his face spoke all that it needed for the conversation, or his intentions had been clear from the start.
Perhaps both, whatever the case, it did not occupy Ash's mind.
It was an open question, one that had a long and surprisingly simple answer to it.
And he would speak honestly, as Ritsuka wished.
"I do not trust her and I do not trust your opinion at this time."
He accepted some measure of hurt for the latter of the two statements, perhaps a reaction of something negative. That was the reaction he had grown to expect from Ritsuka when faced with such comments.
Yet that was not what happened.
Ritsuka took the words with a straight face, reacting to neither of his points and instead nodding his head slowly in acceptance. He leaned away from him and folded his arms, a pursed look and then a tilt of the head.
"Alright, why don't you?"
"To which?"
"Both."
Ash furrowed his brow slightly as he thought of how best he could go about answering that. Though the answer was simple, to articulate it in a manner that could be accepted was rather difficult. Especially with how Ritsuka currently stood, if his suspicions were correct then it would be harder still to offer counsel that would be heeded.
And he felt as though it was a futile effort.
Ritsuka had already made up his mind.
"Would my words even sway you?"
Ritsuka looked exhausted at that, a turn of the head and a tightening of the lips. "Please don't act like I'm just going to dismiss whatever you say out of hand. I wouldn't have come over and spoken to you if I wasn't open to the possibility."
A shrug of the shoulders, one that was barely half-felt.
"But I won't lie to you. I'm rather set on my idea…Even then, I want to address your concerns rather than just walk over them. You have a problem with her…is it because she's your sister or–"
Ash felt himself twitch at that reminder.
The word felt like a strike to the temples, even with the clear hesitance Ritsuka had put before speaking it. As though he did not himself believe fully that it was the reason that Ash would raise these concerns.
Spoken as if that was reason enough, but he was not so vain as to dislike Priscilla purely based on such simple reasoning.
Though if that was the impression he had given in the past…
…No, his problems with his family were justified enough, perhaps there was yet more.
Or perhaps Ritsuka thought of how his last encounter with Priscilla had gone, but it was not a matter of being related to him.
"She could be your sister and I would still voice these concerns. I dislike her because of what she stands for, not for who she might be related to."
Ritsuka looked rather stumped at the words, caught between a reply and with silence. By the end, he offered only a bemused noise from the back of his throat.
"That…" Wetting his lips, Ritsuka looked back at him with some face that could not be properly categorised. A mixture of confusion and perhaps relief? But he would give it no more than that. "I would say thanks for being honest…but if it's not because she's your sister, then that's something at least…but you're making it sound fairly personal here, no offence."
With a brief pause, Ritsuka held up his hand.
"And I would understand if you did not feel all that welcoming of your family…"
Ash set himself down into a grimace, stepping away for a moment and closing his eyes. His thoughts swirled as he centred himself.
A tempered argument.
His eyes opened and he spoke clear and curt.
"She was previously hostile towards our goals." He could see Ritsuka already opening his mouth to retort, Ash beat him first. "And I am aware she is not the only one. But surely you have seen the differences between the Priscilla of now and the one of the past?"
The nod of the head served as his assent to continue.
"It is proof enough that something is altering the personalities of the Servants. Whether directly or by happenstance, we can see the results clear with Priscilla. Perhaps more so than all others. Compared to how she was within London, the two might not even be considered the same individual."
Turning, he brought an arm wide and swept it over their surroundings.
Ritsuka followed the movement slowly, a hint of comprehension but still confusion. Ash saw fit to explain at that once the gesture trailed off.
"Priscilla, as she learned of the Incineration, decided that the single best course of action was to shroud an entire city in snow and ice, draw it into her inner world and then let the inhabitants freeze there for eternity. For as long as she held the Grail, she would have maintained that ruinous hell…because that is what she believed was the correct choice to make."
Ritsuka slowly nodded his head, accepting the words.
Then the teenager raised his right hand, a single finger pointed towards Ash's chest.
"And you believed that killing everyone was the best way to save them. People aren't incapable of making mistakes. She did what she thought was best and we can show her that she was wrong. That there is another solution."
He disliked that argument immediately.
But found himself unable to disagree with it immediately, but not for long.
"She and I are not the same."
"How?" Ritsuka, to his credit, sounded neither incredulous nor accusing. He spoke merely with an innocent confusion about him. As if he was being revealed some mystery which eluded him until now.
"Because you sound fairly similar already. You were both doing what you thought was for the best of people. You might disagree with how she went about it, but you can't say she did it out of malicious intentions."
"Her intentions are not the problem, it was her conviction that…" Ash grumbled back, raising a hand and pinching the bridge of his nose.
Had she done it out of hatred, this would have been easier.
But she had not, Priscilla - foolish Priscilla - had acted out of genuine concern for people, or so her personality had led him to believe in the encounter he had with her. But that was also the problem unto itself.
"All she did, she did out of a sense of kindness." He pulled the hand down and fixed the Master with a long look. "Similar our intentions might have been, I was aware of the contradiction within myself…Priscilla has no doubts and even if you were to ask her now, she would speak kindly of the hell she holds in her soul."
"Because it's her home, isn't it?"
Ritsuka tilted his head and waited for the answer, when he got none he carried on.
"The only home she ever knew. Of course she's going to think it's wonderful, but it's just a matter of showing her that the outside world is-"
"Our solution is not a guarantee."
The interruption cut Ritsuka short, Ash waited for a moment before he spoke further.
"Her solution is." He stopped for a moment, then raised a hand and gestured towards his own head. "At least within her own mind, she can say with certainty that everyone she takes into the Painted world will be safe and secure forever. Priscilla will not gamble away the safety of everyone for such a thing, not in her mind."
"How do you know?"
He stopped and blinked.
He gazed at the young boy and the boy fixed him with an unflinching look back, clearly showing that he would not back down.
But what puzzled Ash more was the question itself.
"What?"
Ritsuka folded his arms and tilted his head. "How do you know she would act like that?"
What could he reply with that?
Because it was what he would do if the solution was open to him.
Sacrificing certainty for a gamble, it would be madness.
But he wasn't going to admit that out loud, yet it seemed to be unneeded as the flash of understanding flickered through the eyes of Ritsuka. The teen closed his eyes and released a slow breath, his hands came up to nurse at his temples for several seconds, then they removed themselves. Sliding down his face and onto the back of his neck.
"You don't agree with a lot of people, Ash. You've never made it a point to argue openly about them. Sulyvahn, for example. You take issue with Mordred as well, we can all see that. Leonidas is another you've spoken about…why Priscilla?"
Ash straightened himself. "They were summoned and could be dealt with if they offered a problem."
Ritsuka squinted. "...Ignoring the implication, what does Priscilla have that they don't?"
He found her goals personally offensive to him.
Perhaps because they were frightfully similar to his own and yet so radically different. A mirror twisted up to an uncomfortable degree.
"Sulyvahn is motivated by pride and few trust him…Leonidas has some uses to explain away his being in Chaldea."
He fell silent as he debated the final two examples.
Ritsuka watched him, then slowly dropped his arms down to his side. "And Mordred and Priscilla?"
Ash rolled his jaw. "You are acting based on your emotions."
"I was acting based on my emotions when I accepted a contract with you after London."
The rebuttal came without warning and it came terribly hard, like that of a hammer upon iron. It silenced both of them.
Ash was at a momentary loss as he stared into the eyes of the young man.
Slowly, his arms folded over and he looked down at Ritsuka.
"You are invested in their wellbeing out of misplaced guilt. Allowing yourself to be drawn along by their whims because you believe it is your duty to uphold their demands, even if they are reprehensible. Agreeing to take Priscilla along was not sound judgement and Mordred already explained as such."
Ritsuka nodded. "And I explained why already."
This was frustrating, terribly, terribly frustrating.
Ash felt his jaw clench hard, teeth ground together with such strength they could shatter inside his mouth at any moment. Spikes of irritation flashed through him as again and again, Ritsuka failed to understand the point he was making.
Priscilla could not be trusted.
The version that stood before them was as weak as she was ever going to get.
Perhaps another angle to the argument? One that he could make which would lay bare the concerns in a manner which could put the problem to rest. At least for some time. As it stood, Ritsuka seemed determined to bring Priscilla back to Chaldea because of his emotions at the moment.
Yet what guarantee was there that Priscilla would abandon her goal once her mind was broken of the-
Ash's thought snapped onto that line of argument.
His mind whirled with the information and formed fresh consensus.
With a steadying breath, he looked upon Ritsuka once more.
"She arrived at this distortion." He explained slowly. "She was not summoned by Chaldea. If she had been, my misgivings would be fewer. She would have at least understood that in agreeing to accept a summon, she was going to cast aside her way of doing things and accept yours."
Ash gestured to the ground they stood upon, then jerked his head to the wider area.
"She came to this distortion. I can only assume she intended the same for this place as she did for London and it was only the lack of a Grail and whatever mental trap she walked into that has spared this city from the same fate."
Ritsuka exhaled. "You don't know that-"
"What reason do I have to doubt it?" Ash cut him short and looked long and hard at the face of the teenager. Searching for signs of argument, he honed the point further. "What reason is there to believe that she would abruptly change her ways and decide to clear out this tower and then depart?"
As expected, there was no answer.
Ash settled himself back and drew in a short breath, his arms returned to his side.
"Your investment is blinding you to the dangers she presents."
"You're letting the past dictate what she might do." Ritsuka argued back, a little louder but not quite a shout. "I'm not going to start treating people differently based on hypotheticals. Yes, she was an enemy in the past and I accept that. Yes. She might well do the same thing again in the future but she's not given me reason to suspect her of doing something like that yet."
Ritsuka stepped forwards and brought up a hand, pressing it over his own heart and curling it.
"I'm giving her the same chance I'm giving you, to change…do I want her to come back with us to Chaldea…? Yes…"
"Because of your guilt." Ash countered and then closed his eyes, his voice shifted and turned quieter. "You are setting yourself up for agony if she betrays this trust."
"And so I shouldn't take a chance on her? Like I didn't take a chance on you?"
Ash straightened and kept his eyes closed.
He wondered how long it would take for that to be brought up.
"And I would aim this criticism at myself as well."
"That doesn't make it right."
"How, then, is it wrong?"
"Just-!" Ritsuka threw up his arms and cut himself short, pacing away from him and towards the railings.
The boy sighed and leaned forwards, pressing his hands against the bannister and holding himself there.
"...I'm giving her the same chance I'm giving you Ash."
He could see that clearly indeed, yet there remained a fault with the line of reasoning. One that Ash was decidedly uncomfortable with. Any answer she provided now would be worthless given that she was not operating with her full wits.
"The one you're giving it to isn't her."
There was a pause in the wake of his words.
Soon a breath came from the direction of Ritsuka and the boy dropped his head. "...Because of the threat of mental interference."
Ash stepped forwards. "Here she felt as though there was reason enough to claw out her eyes with her own fingers, yet within London she was prepared to fight to the death for her convictions and her home?"
Slowly, he shook his head from side to side.
"These are not the markings of one acting with their full faculties. Surely you can see such things? The Priscilla now and the one we met are not entirely the same individual. We cannot take at face value whatever this one says is reflected when she is a whole."
The boy turned ever so slightly and exhaled. "...What are you saying then? The one you don't trust isn't her but the person she normally is?"
Ash nodded his head in line of sight of the boy's vision.
It felt easier to get this through to him now.
"Even supposing she were to agree with you now. In this state she is not the same as she would be otherwise…and upon the recovery of her senses, you would doubtless extend the hand of aid for her in the wake of this. Yet that could very well spell our own doom if she were to twist that hand…Unless you intend to leave her in this lobotomised state for the duration of a contract?"
Ritsuka grimaced deeply, an ugly expression which spoke of the extent of his disgust with the thought.
Ash watched on as the boy debated within his mind.
It was as he saw it, he could trust nothing this Priscilla said to be a true representation of her thoughts. Nothing of sound mind could mutilate itself to such mad degrees and then claim they had been liberated. Priscilla had felt something wrong with this world and had acted as such, the results spoke for themselves.
Her placid nature and accepting tone.
She agreed and lingered with them like some lost pup.
He cared nothing for it, but the burden weighed clear on the shoulders of Ritsuka, and with how the boy was already, he was ill-prepared for the possible - and likely - eventuality that Priscilla would turn on them for the sake of her own dream.
Ash did not want to think of what manner of hideous face Ritsuka would make if such a thing came to pass.
To spare the boy this now was a mercy…or at the very least to prepare him for the possibility if it could not be truly cut out.
Ash twitched at the word that resounded through his mind.
Then he grimaced but found himself hardly disgusted with it in this context.
Yet he could not help but wonder who he was truly sparing from pain.
"...Alright." Ritsuka nodded slowly, Ash was drawn back to the Master as he stepped away and turned about to face him. "We'll see how she feels about all this when the situation is resolved and whatever made this distortion is gone…if there is a mind spell - and that would be just our luck - then we'll get a clear answer from her."
Ash inclined his head. "And if her answer should remain the same as it did in London?"
Ritsuka glanced away with an unhealthy shade of white.
And with a mouth that produced no words.
That was fine.
Even if Ritsuka could not bring himself to give the order, Ash was more than fine with carrying it out on his own.
It was, after all, the one thing he was really good at.
"...What about Shiki?"
Ash angled his head at the name and raised a brow. "What of her?"
The change in topics was curious, but not unwelcome. He felt they had reached an understanding in part for the previous one.
Unless…
"You mean to ask my opinion of her."
Ritsuka hummed and nodded, turning and facing him. "What do you think about her?"
"...I have no true thoughts regarding her." Ash admitted after a moment. "Her personality is neither one that I approve or disapprove of as of late…aspects of her are welcome and unwelcome. Though I could think of worse assistance to receive…yet I dislike the lack of knowledge around her."
Ritsuka twitched at that, a frown spread over his face.
"That bad?"
"There is nothing."
"...Timeline variation?"
Ash stopped and raised a brow. "You think so?"
Ritsuka offered only a shrug, signalling it had been a guess on his part.
Though it would answer a great many questions for him, namely why this place held no weight in his mind beyond being a regular building.
"I have no reason to hold complaints against her beyond that. She is attentive and clearly will see this through to the end despite her misgivings…what of you?"
"Me?" Ritsuka held himself in ponderous silence for but a moment, then he grunted. "She's fine…I sort of like having her around. A little aloof but she gets right to the point. A bit like you, so I appreciate that…she sort of reminds me a bit of a cat, actually."
The comparison felt bewildering to him. "...A cat."
"Yeah…that's not a weird thing to say, is it?"
"...I would not-"
He twitched as a sound cut through the silence, within a second his hand was on Ritsuka's shoulder and pushing him back and behind him, raising his other and clasping the handle of his sword and wrenching it from his back with a single pull.
It was levelled at the sound before Ritsuka could even utter a single noise, so swift was the motion.
A few metres ahead of them, the door pulled inwards at the sound of the latch coming undone from within.
Ash watched for movement.
Long flowing crimson hair atop soft features appeared, leaning out from the closed door and fixing a look in his direction. The face, set in confusion, swiftly changed into recognition as her eyes went first to him, then towards Ritsuka behind him before darting away to further back and the others.
"Ash?"
"Boudica?"
"Master?"
"Boudica?"
She stepped fully out onto the little walkway, one hand still holding onto the doorframe.
"I thought I heard voices coming closer and they sounded familiar…if I had known it was you then…"
Trailing off, the Rider shook her head. Soon, a relieved smile worked its way onto her lips. "Nevermind all that now then, come on in. I'm not one for expecting so many visitors but you could probably do with a rest if you've come up from the ground floor…"
Her face turned a touch disturbed.
"I've been hearing all manner of foul noises from beneath my floors for a while now and they've only gotten worse as time went on…until they got quiet. Your doing, I suppose?"
That question was aimed at him.
He answered it with a silent nod, loosening his stance and lowering the sword down.
"I'm glad to see you're doing alright, Boudica." Ritsuka stepped out from behind him and approached the Rider.
With a wide smile, the woman over towards the boy and placed her hands on his shoulders, keeping him in place as she looked him over with some discerning eye. Then stepped back and gave a satisfied nod of the head, reaching up and roughly tussling his hair about as though he were some dog.
"And to you as well. I'm terribly sorry about all of you coming out here…I can't imagine I was the only one who was whisked away to parts unseen, was I?"
Ritsuka shook his head at that, "No, We met Verndari on the way up and…a couple other Servants."
Boudica's eyes slowly shifted towards the direction of Priscilla and she nodded. "I can see that…"
She trailed off and squinted.
Ash supposed the Rider had noticed the extent of the Assassins injuries.
Boudica sent him a questioning look which he only shrugged at, then jerked his head towards the door.
"You invited us in?"
"...Yes." Boudica replied slowly, with one final glance in the direction of his sister, then back to Master. "You'll probably be wanting to have a talk with me about what's been going on. Don't worry, I'll be sure to tell you everything I know while I whip up something for you to eat. You're probably all a bit hungry and thirsty after all the work, aren't you?"
Ritsuka jerked back. "Well, I-"
"Great!" Boudica turned without hearing the answer, then stalked into the house. "I'll get started right away! Ash, you can help me!"
Oh, he could, could he?
Ritsuka sent him a look over his shoulder. "She seems…calm?"
"...Exceedingly."
He was glad they both noticed that.
Certainly at odds with Verndari's behaviour, and that of the others.
Perhaps that meant it was yet to come, or that something else was at play here..
Either way, it would become clear soon enough.
Ash advanced on the open door first, turning and taking but a single step into the abode.
For a single step was all it took for him to run right into another occupant.
And of the crimson serpent that looked back at him, almost nose to nose.
AN:
Ash: "Ritsuka, there is a doormat here."
Ritsuka: "Really? What does it say?"
Ash: "..."
Ritsuka: "Oh…right…uhm…let me just have a-"
Ash: "...Ritsuka?"
Ritsuka: "It's not very welcoming."