Melpomene, Flora and Hestia Help Draco and His Friends, Umbridge and Fudge Get Their Comeuppance and Team Prank Go Plane Hunting
I hope you slept poorly last night, you impudent insect! It is no less than you deserve for what you had to make us endure! First you force us to go to a bowling alley, then forced us to put up with Dumbledore and his Order of Flaming Chickens, but you had to compound all of that with ridiculous bouncy monstrosities and embarrassing T-shirts!
To be fair, I sent those T-shirts long ago and you made the mistake of wearing them right now.
It was warm weather!
And you should have probably worn something other than the mood T-shirts.
I am going to enjoy making you scream.
That sounds wrong.
HARRY!
It had been two days since the Carrows' birthday and all through those two days, Harry was forced to put up with the verbal berating from his very moody enemy. It had gotten worse when during one of the warmer days of October the Death Munchers had decided to wear their mood T-shirts because everything else made the Dark wizards feel like they were being boiled because of the heat.
The issue was, as Dudley had rightly stated, instead of changing colour with the wizards' moods, they started revealing sweaty patches – in awkward place, in the case of Bella and Alecto. Indeed, those T-shirts also emphasised their chest areas, which had made both witches red with fury. Quite a few of the men, Rodolphus especially, very nearly lost their eyes as they tended to wander to that particular area.
Apparently Mr. Mupples and Rabastan had to talk Bella down from taking her anger out on pure old Ollivander because she was that embarrassed.
As a result, Voldemort had taken to pestering and shouting at Harry through the Link at any given moment that the Dark Lord felt like it. So far, Voldemort had managed to ruin two of Harry's potions, distracted him during Charms, almost made him Transfigure the wrong creature, and distracted Harry through Snape's lessons. So this was the third day of Voldemort trying to drive Harry further up the bend with his constant raving.
Currently, Harry was trying to get Quidditch practise underway and Grandpa Cueball was making that extremely difficult.
Why are you wasting your time with this ridiculous sport? Nagini and Thalia spend their time much better, and that is saying something!
Are they still looking for a mate for you?
Yes.
Let me guess: no luck?
No, Voldemort grumbled. They continue to waste their time and energy on it despite the fact they know I have no interest in finding a spouse!
Why are you wasting your time annoying me? Harry could not help but jibe.
Because you deserve it! Now, why are you still wasting your time with this drivel when it is clear your Keeper can't do his job properly? Voldemort demanded. Harry felt his jaws clench. If you're not going to pipe down, you might as well just come back later.
You know I am right, Harry. Lord Voldemort is rarely ever wrong!
Well-
Harry!
You're not going to sit there and tell me you're always right are you? Because I distinctly remember you thought giving Lucius the lead to try and get the prophecy back a few months ago was a good idea.
I don't like you.
We knew that already.
Harry decided to try and focus on his team again instead of the petulant Dark Lord in his head. Ginny was in awesome form, as always – so was Katie Bell. Even his new Beaters were doing rather well. The only one who wasn't doing too well, was Ron. His saves were just as clumsy as the ones from the try-outs, perhaps even more so. If that was even possible. Unfortunately, the stands were occupied by people. Not just Luna, Hermione, Justin, Dean and Seamus though.
Considering there were more than a few snickers, Slytherins were present as well.
Brilliant. It seems I need to start broadening my target range again, Harry grumbled internally.
What? It is funny.
No one asked you, Voldie!
I am merely pointing out the obvious, and stop calling me Voldie!
I will stop calling you Voldie when you start wearing yellow on your own accord and agree to go on a date with someone Thalia and Nagini pick!
Why yellow, you weird child?!
Because that colour is in none of your wardrobes and doesn't scream Dark-Lord-Who-Will-Kill-You-Because-He-Doesn't-Like-Your-Face.
I have no problems with someone's face, just their blood status!
As if that is any better!
It is!
You need to be put into a home, Grandpa!
I AM NOT OLD!
Whilst desperately trying to ignore the most needy and obsessive person he has ever met, the Boy-Who-Was-Tempted-To-Ply-His-Best-Mate-With-Felix-Felicis started to internally formulate a plan to try and boost Ron's confidence before their first game against the Snakes. Unfortunately for him, the Slytherins already started formulating a way to try and destroy Ron's nerves even further, to shred it completely.
A nice, mocking chant!
Blaise, Millicent, Pansy, Gregory and Vincent were working on it on the stands and were still trying to improve it throughout the day. During one of their free periods the group were still tweaking the lyrics – this was how Draco found them. He had been searching for them because he had heard from Daphne, Astoria and Theo that they were up to something, and when he heard it involved Team Prank, Draco immediately knew he wanted in on that action.
"-no, no, no, Vince you are completely off-key!"
"The rhythm is completely off anyway!"
"I told you that we should have gone to Daphne and Astoria for help. At least they have a musical bone in their body!"
"No, you're just tone deaf!"
Draco rolled his eyes and folded his arms when he came to a stand in front of his friends, who were still distracted with whatever it was that they were doing. "And just what are the lot of you doing that requires music?" he demanded silkily, raising an eyebrow.
All five heads turned snappishly to look at him.
Blaise smirked. "We are making a chant to sing during the Quidditch match. We have this season in the bag, Drake – Weasley can't Keep for shit! So we're going to celebrate him as Slytherin's King!"
Draco could hardly believe what he was hearing. Surely Potter wasn't that into nepotism – he would have picked a competent Keeper, right? More to the point, Weasley practically grew up on a broom, much like the other purebloods. He would have more than enough skills to Keep.
"Right," Draco drawled in a manner that Snape would have been proud of.
"If you don't believe us, you can ask some of the Badgers and Eagles. They'll tell you Weasley looks like a bloody amateur," Gregory smirked. "Gryffindor need a miracle or a whole lotta luck to win the Cup this year!"
Draco rolled his eyes. "Fine. Let's say I believe you," he held his hand out to the parchment. "Show me the chant."
Pansy handed it over, looking utterly embarrassed. She really wasn't happy with it at all. "We haven't even put in a verse about his stupid father or his useless mother," she grumbled. "Mostly because Millie can't rhyme to save her life!"
"Hey! We need to keep a consistent melody and 'fat and ugly', and 'useless loser' completely mess everything up!" Millicent folded her arms and scowled at her friend.
"And some of us need singing lessons," Blaise added, shooting not so subtle glances at Gregory and Vincent.
"OI!" both of them protested in unison.
"We all knew that already," Pansy agreed readily.
"Stay out of this, Pans," Gregory grumbled.
Draco was shaking his head at the verses. "Well, all I can say is that we do need some help from some more musically and lyrically inclined people. Daph and Astoria are out of the question right now though because both are in their study flow and I don't fancy losing my eyes and my legs to boot."
"We could go and ask Flora and Hestia," Blaise suggested with a smirk. "Hestia is good at writing songs and Flora knows how to keep rhythm; she's a dancer after all."
"Good idea. Let's go and find them," Millicent jumped to her feet, eyes shining with mischief.
"You coming too, Drake, or are you going off to that hidey hole of yours again?" Gregory teased as he and the others got to their feet as well.
Draco rolled his eyes but smirked. "A chance to annoy Potter and Weasley? Not passing that up, Greg, you know that!"
"Great!" Pansy grinned. "Let's go and find them before our free period is over. We still have around forty minutes left and still have a lot of work to do."
The sixth year Slytherins set off on their Flora and Hestia Hunt. One might have correctly assumed that they would lose more time on trying to track the two girls down but it was actually Kingsley and Ferrars who pointed them towards the Music department. Apparently the girls had bumped into Melpomene and Neville Longbottom in the library; Melpomene was humming too much so Neville had asked the girls to distract the musical Cobra Lily. Hence, the group of Slytherins headed straight for the Music rooms.
They found the Carrow twins teaching Melpomene how to sing some traditional, pureblood folk songs. Hestia was on the harp and singing too while Flora kept the beat; the Cobra Lily was bobbing her head along, listening entranced.
Draco and his friends waited patiently for the girls to finish their song – they all still rather liked Three Bluebells Grew In Mother Night's Garden, the current song the girls were teaching Melpomene.
Once they were done, Blaise commented, "Melpomene is getting a proper musical education, I see!"
"Well someone has to do it! Potter's hopeless, Longbottom is musically inept, and the Weasleys are not going to do it," Flora pointed out easily with a grin.
"Well, you girls don't mind if she helps us with something, do you?" Pansy asked, smirking. "We are coming up with a Quidditch chant and we may need yours and perhaps also Melpomene's help."
*You are writing a song?* Melpomene lit up at hearing this, shaking her petal hood excitedly.
For a moment, Draco and his friends jumped a little in surprise at the fact that they could understand the Cobra Lily, which made the Carrow twins laugh in unison. They recovered rather quickly.
"Yes, we are. A rather fun one too," Millicent informed with a grin.
The Cobra Lily shook her petals again. *Can you sing it for Melpomene?*
The friends exchanged excited looks before Pansy did the honours
# Weasley is our king,
Weasley cannot save a single thing,
He cannot block a single ring,
That's why we Slytherins all sing,
Weasley is our king,
Weasley was born in a bin,
He always lets the Quaffle in,
Weasley will make sure we win,
Weasley is our king,
Weasley is our king,
Weasley is our king,
He always lets the Quaffle in,
Weasley is our king!
#
To say that Melpomene wasn't happy, would be an understatement. But not for the reason one might think she would be. She hissed in annoyance, baring her fangs at the Slytherins, petal hood flaring up, causing the Slytherins to tense up considerably.
*Your notes are all wrong!* the Cobra Lily hissed in annoyance. *You hurt Melpomene's senses! Changes need to be made and more rhythm needs to be added. Make it more fast paced. You also need to do more vocal practises before trying to sing. You also sang from the wrong part of your mouth!*
Flora and Hestia were not too happy either, frowning a whole lot more than usual.
"Melpomene is right. Could you please keep your notes consistent? At some point you went D, D, A, D, etc for no good reason, Pansy! And I swear I heard you mixed your G notes and your C notes up!" Hestia shook her head at her Housemates. "I thought you were trained in three instruments, Pans?"
"I am," Pansy grumbled. "Actually singing is not something I have been trained for! We tried our best here!"
"Well, it isn't good enough," Flora answered bluntly. She held out her hand for the parchment. "Give it here. Hestia, Melpomene and I will fix it."
*Yes, give it to Melpomene. Melpomene knows already which parts need to be changed,* Melpomene stated primly.
"Several lines in the first verse?" Hestia gauged.
*Absolutely!*
Draco and his friends could not help but exchange grins as the Carrows and the Cobra Lily set to work.
"How do you think Potter is going to take it that Melpomene is helping us?" Vincent could not help but ponder out loud.
"Probably not very well," Gregory grinned.
"Should be funny when he finds out," Draco could not help but smirk. "His beloved plant not taking sides – doubt he is going to like that!"
*This has no flow whatsoever! Hestia, take it out.*
"Yes, ma'am."
###########################################################################
It was probably the understatement of the century, but the Ministry of Magic was still in utter turmoil following the scandalous revelations made in the Quibbler article from a few days ago. Rufus Scrimgeour had made the mistake of trying to avoid his issues by booking as many meetings as he could with the Muggle Prime Minister and the Queen, but it seemed that very soon his staff, with Merula Snyde-Hallow at the helm, saw through his ruse and had deliberately began sabotaging his escape attempts.
Eventually, Minister Scrimgeour found himself effectively forced into dealing with the Senior Undersecretary and the former Minister for Magic. Mostly because several Department Heads had also begun to launch formal complaints, with Amelia Bones being the most vocal of them all.
As such, Umbridge the toad, Cornelius Fudge and all the Department Heads were escorted to the Minister's office like a bunch of naughty school children, much to the amusement of Yaxley, who had wished that he knew how to make popcorn all of a sudden. Indeed, he had been waiting for this moment for quite a while.
"This should be good."
Yaxley found himself smiling as he turned to see Tonks, who was dressed in some kind of Sherlock Holmes kind of clothing today.
"What do you think their punishment is going to be?"
Tonks grinned. "Personally I hope Fudge gets community service and has to spend the rest of his days as someone's personal shopper."
Yaxley could not help but snort. "Personal shopper? That is the worst you could come up with?"
"Shall I ask Aunt Narcissa to ask you to help her carry her shopping the next time she wants to go on a spree? Or even my mother?" Tonks raised a challenging eyebrow.
Yaxley paled at the mischievous look. "On second thoughts, I think I would rather not risk it."
"That is the correct answer," Tonks stated.
"And what do you think will be Madam Umbridge's punishment?" Yaxley decided to move on to the next condemned.
"Oh, I am hoping she is sentences to hopping around as entertainment in the children's ward at St. Mungo's," Tonks grinned maliciously. "Let us see how she handles being around children that she can't mutilate."
Yaxley could not help but grin too. "And the children essentially given permission to make her cry tears of despair."
"Would give Gilderoy Lockhart something to write about when he gets bored in the Janus Thickney Ward," Tonks' grin grew.
Yaxley found himself frowning a little though. "I am still surprised that the idiot possesses the capacity to do anything save look himself in a mirror. But do you think Rufus Scrimgeour would be diabolical enough?"
"Madam Bones will not let him off the hook easily, nor the others – whole of wizarding Britain may write Howlers if the punishment is not commensurate to what the kiddies at Hogwarts had to endure," Tonks pointed out. "Plus, I have it on good authority that Merula is not to be trifled with at the moment. She had actually glued – no not with magic, with glue – the Minister to his chair so he could not escape her umpteenth lecture yesterday. Apparently, his inaction is a 'political headache', 'makes him look ineffective' and 'might make people consider the useless gnat Pius Thicknesse as a successor to his office'." Tonks whistled. "Merula really let him have it yesterday."
"Does Mrs. Snyde-Hallow not let someone 'have it' often?" Yaxley smirked. He had seen enough of the young woman's temper to know that someone could very easily say something or do something that broke the straw on the camel's back.
Tonks snorted. "Oh, trust me – this was different to normal! Normally, Mere keeps control of her temper, but now … oh boy. Apparently, Asteria has been hiding in the archives and at the Quibbler offices just to avoid being around the walking, talking volcano. Penny and Barnaby obviously try to help still the storm but once Merula gets going, nothing can stop her. I have been thinking of getting Badeea and Tulip's help with her."
"Who?" Yaxley's brow furrowed further.
"Oh a couple of more old school chums. Former Ravenclaws," Tonks answered easily. "Badeea researches some seriously advanced Magical Theory – she experiments by actually practising her own theories. Doesn't surprise me. Her motto was always 'creativity is intelligence having fun', so you know that girl was never going to be normal. As for Tulip, massive prankster. Works for Fred and George Weasley in the marketing department. Was in the Frog Choir with Asteria. I haven't met many amusing Eagles, but those two are diamonds amongst the coal."
"So your group really had people from all four Houses?" Yaxley could not help but be surprised.
Tonks laughed. "Yep! Made it a whole lot more fun, as you saw for yourself. I do hope you get to see us as a complete group at one point. Charlie and Higgy were the life a soul of the party, Bill was the dad, Asteria the troublemaker, Merula the person who tried to keep people's heads out of the clouds, Penny the sweet little sister, me just being awesome, Badeea and Tulip doing their thing and then Barnaby being Barnaby!"
"Those girls didn't play chess against a Niffler then, I take it?" Yaxley could not help but smile.
Tonks laughed heartily. "Oh hell no!"
Yaxley would have pressed further but soon the door opened and out streamed the department heads, looking rather relieved. Elizabeth Abbott looked like she had won the lottery and when she saw Tonks and Yaxley, immediately joined them, beaming. "We have good news! Madam Umbridge and Mr. Fudge will no longer be allowed to work at the Ministry in any capacity that holds any meaningful power. They will also have to do community service-"
"I KNEW IT!" Tonks celebrated, her hair turning an alarming shade of yellow.
"Ssssh," Yaxley scolded lightly as a few people looked in their direction.
"It hasn't been decided yet what they should do," Elizabeth continued. "Because that is up to Amelia. Rufus is thoroughly sick of this nonsense."
"As are we all!" Tonks snorted. She quick lit up. "Tell Amelia to send Umbridge to the children's ward in St. Mungo's! Really make this toad suffer!"
"And Fudge should be given as a personal shopper," Yaxley added with a sadistic smirk.
Elizabeth rolled her eyes, but turned on her heel to go and make the suggestions to Madam Bones, leaving a jubilant Tonks and Yaxley behind her.
"So, do you want to visit Dippy with me this weekend or are you busy this weekend as well?" Tonks asked as casually as she could manage as they watched Elizabeth's retreating figure.
Yaxley found himself flushing in embarrassment. "I think you know exactly why I was busy, imp."
Tonks smirked a little. "We got trounced by Muggle teenaged boys! Well, I suppose I shouldn't have been too surprised. They did seem to look like they knew what they were doing."
"Indeed," Yaxley agreed easily. He swallowed a little. "Did you … ask your werewolf to come with you to see the diplodocus?"
"No," Tonks scoffed. "Remus and I are not talking, unless we have to. Besides, I don't want to take him to see Dippy – he has to earn it first! I want to take you."
Yaxley found himself smirking once more. "And what have I done to earn it?"
Tonks quickly began listing. "Put up with me, for one? Helped take down the toad for another. You helped me catch Mundungus. I'd say you earned it!"
"You have a funny way of looking at life, Tonks," Yaxley chuckled.
"That is not a no, Corban."
"Because I am not saying no."
Though Tonks was surprised for a moment, she recovered quickly and grinned. "Good! So I don't need to drag you there then."
"Indeed not," Yaxley then surprised her further. "May I offer you a doughnut and coffee before we go back to work?"
Tonks' hair somehow turned even more yellow at this point and her face lit up just as much. "You may. My, my, this day just gets better and better!"
As the unlikely friends started to head towards the food court, they were utterly oblivious to some of the knowing looks that were being sent their way by passing colleagues, some of which could barely contain their amusement.
###########################################################################
"Little brother-"
"-you will not believe-"
"-what we have to tell you-"
"-about the Vanishing Cabinet!"
"Could the both of you spare me the theatrics for a minute and just tell me?" Ron asked in exasperation. "I had a shit day and frankly I am no in a good mood."
"Oh? And why is that, Ronnikins?" Fred teased through the fire.
"Still cannot Keep for shit and Melpomene is helping the Snakes humiliate me," Ron growled. "That damn Cobra Lily helped them with a fucking chant!"
"We all know that Melpomene loves music," George pointed out. "Snakes know how to charm the snake plant, baby brother!"
"Urgh," Ron pulled a face.
"So, may we now tell you what we know about the creepy antique in Borgin's back office?" Fred wanted to know.
Ron huffed. "Fine."
"Good. Now, what-"
"-the Vanishing Cabinet in the office does-"
"-is cry, whine, and sob-"
"-as though it is upset-"
"-Borgin cannot get to shut up-"
"-he tries everything except that thing called duct tape-"
"-the Cabinet scared away two customers – it was funny-"
"-one of them wanted to buy a really ugly hat so it was not loss-"
"-the Hand of Glory waved bye-"
"-did we mention that Gred and I bought pair of binoculars?"
Ron rolled his eyes. "No, you didn't. You didn't even tell me that Dad has already started working on his motorbikes yet – I had to get a letter from Mum that is almost a Howler because of how much she complains about it. By the way, Harry might be in touch later today."
"Oh?" George perked up. "About what?"
"A plane."
"Oooo one of our familiar planes? We'll keep our eye on the fireplace! Now, little brother, back to business. Whatever is making your Cabinet come to life, has something done the same to its little friend. Which means, whatever Ferret Malfoy is doing, it is working and it is working fast!" Fred got the train of thought back on the tracks.
"Which is a problem for us!" George added dramatically. "It could mean that those two Cabinets could actually start communicating. Who knows what will happen when that starts to happen?"
"Maybe the shit that Ferret Malfoy gets spills into Borgin & Burke's?" Fred cackled. "Oooo now that would be something to see!"
Ron frowned at this point. His mind was ticking away but there was something else that was bothering him at present. "Hold on, how in the name of everything good and magical have you two been spying on Borgin?"
"From the roof," came the rather concerning reply from the twins.
"The roof?!" Ron spluttered. "What roof?"
"What roof? Borgin's roof!" Fred stated a though it should have been obvious.
"Borgin's roof? How did you even get up there without being noticed?" Ron was getting increasingly concerned.
"Muggle Santa Clause doesn't reveal his secrets so neither shall we," George answered.
"Muggle Santa has a sleigh and magical reindeer, George," Ron pinched the bridge of his nose at this point. "That is no great secret!"
"Well we might not have a sleigh or reindeer but we do have some mean Apparating and spell work skills," Fred was actually pouting at this point! "But no one noticed us, least of all Borgin. The man was too busy trying to make sure he doesn't go prematurely bald from the stress."
"Well you two are not the most stealthy of people," Ron could not help point out.
"Excuse you little brother!" the twins chorused, looking affronted. "Have you met us?!"
"Yes," Ron raised a challenging eyebrow. "The only time you two were stealthy was to steal from Filch or to try and avoid Hermione so you could use the First Years as your test subjects for your products last year. The rest was because of the Map-"
"SSSSSHHH!"
"Merlin's saggy Y-fronts, everyone is at lunch!" Ron huffed.
"Walls have ears in that place, little bro!" Fred stated.
"Portraits too," George added.
"And ghosts!"
"And blabbing familiars!"
"The furniture could talk if you made them-"
"ALL RIGHT! I get it!"
The twins snickered. "You're too easy, Ronnikins! Forge and I will keep you posted about that Cabinet. Right now, Tulip has just come in with a frown – we were supposed to have a meeting with her, we just remembered – and frankly she is scary when she is angry soooo we need to go. Now."
Ron grinned. "Yeah, go ahead. Do not keep your top marketeer waiting."
Fred and George were gone in seconds, and left Ron alone with his thoughts.
Whatever Ferret Malfoy is doing, it seems to be working.
Whatever Ferret Malfoy is doing, is making the other Cabinet feel things too.
Why does Ferret Malfoy want these two to connect? Why care about whether two Cabinets are linked up or not?
Ron soon found himself up on his feet, pacing up and down the Gryffindor common room.
The Cabinet is driving Borgin mad … why does he have it? Why is it in the back office and not for sale?
Did Ferret Malfoy buy it, or his parents? Why? Why is it still there if they did?
It didn't make sense. Nothing was making sense. Ron knew he was not seeing this particular chess board clearly enough, but he had no idea what move he wasn't seeing or the piece of the board that was flying over his head, and it was irritating him. He felt his jaw clench.
Weasley is our King!
Those mocking words ran through his mind and he scoffed to himself. I might be a shit Keeper, but undoing plots of bad guys is something I have been doing since I was eleven. This is something I know I can do!Ron, with determination in his step, turned tail and headed for the dorm where he knew Seamus had one of the phones hidden. Harry had not taken it that day because of practise, Dean didn't need it, nor did Seamus. Neville was spending the day in the library of all places, reading old books about old kind of Herbology magic of some note – Ron had no idea, but it was plant stuff so he didn't really care.
Ron fished the mobile out of Seamus's dirty sock drawer, holding his nose a little, and then casting a Cleaning Charm on the device before he dialled a few numbers and waited for the phone to ring.
The person in question picked up rather quickly.
"I was wondering when you'd give a call, Ron."
Ron rolled his eyes. "Hey, Luna. You up for spying on Malfoy some more?"
"Of course! The Mystery of the Vanishing Cabinet cannot be left unsolved," Luna answered brightly. "Of course, we need to get Dobby, Kreacher and Winky to help us."
"Can we leave Kreacher out of this? He gives me the creeps," Ron pleaded.
"Ron, you're being mean."
Ron huffed. "Fine, but I hope he is still under the no-talking-with-Malfoy rule."
"Harry reinforced the rule when Kreacher came to tell him about the locket being recovered," Luna reassured.
"Good," Ron exhaled sharply. "Then we go tonight. When the Ferret leaves after dinner. There is something that my brothers said that just doesn't – I can't shake this feeling like we're missing something obvious."
Luna hummed knowingly in agreement. "Do we wear black, Agent Weasley?"
"Nah, we'll just take Harry's Cloak. Should be fine."
"OK! This is exciting! Oh by the way, did you hear about Madam Umbridge and about Mr. Fudge? They have been fired! Daddy told me just now."
"Well than fuck for that!"
"And they are getting community service."
"Is Umbridge going to be cooking for prisoners at Azkaban?"
"Ron!"
"What? I doubt they have a human cook over there."
"She is still a toad."
"Fair point. Doubt they have a toad for a cook either."
"Me too. See you tonight, Ron."
"See ya," Ron stated and then hung up and then smiled to himself for a moment. Umbridge was fired! That was the first piece of good news he had all day!
###########################################################################
The Boy-Who-Was-Getting-Agitated-And-Impatient-To-Send-Some-Proper-Pranks-Again had not been happy for the entire day, but had to console himself with what he was about to do was going to make Grandpa Marvolo want to cry salty tears, want to kill him, kill something else and then cry some more, which had to be some kind of consolation prize. True, hearing about the fall of Fudge and Umbridge from Ron and Luna had helped to lighten his mood, but not completely.
And after hearing that Melpomene had apparently helped Draco and his friends with a humiliating chant at Ron's expense, Harry really did just want to make someone – preferably Voldemort – suffer. So when Team Prank, sans Luna and Ron for an extra spying session on Draco, gathered that evening, they were all surprised and excited to find out that they only had one target for tonight, but that this 'gift' was going to be just as headache inducing as their deliveries.
"A plane for Thalia. This should be good," Colin had stated, rubbing his hands together in glee.
"One that can help her cause the most mayhem," Justin grinned.
"Has to be a good model, though," Dean pointed out.
"That is where Fred and George come in," Harry smirked.
Right on cue, the fire in the Gryffindor fireplace leapt up and Fred and George's smirking countenances came into view. "Hello, fellow Councillors of Pranks! We hear that you have some business for us?"
"Indeed, Messrs Weasley, we are in need of a plane," Seamus answered in a deliberately pompous tone. "For one snake who has a propensity for jokes and making bad guys want to cry into their pillows."
"Yes, so we have gathered from the General," Fred stated back just as pompously and stepped out of the way of the Fire Call for a moment to show them a table behind him, full of planes. "Which is why Gred and I have procured for you the best of our familiar plane models in order for you to browse properly."
The group of Lions and one Badger crowded closer to the fireplace, carefully, in order to take a closer look. "Oooo, you have a bunch!" Dennis's eyes shone. "Are they based on Muggle planes?"
"Yes, from the Muggle Second World War," Fred informed. "Tulip suggested it since they had some of the best plane designs. She is also working on a line of familiar tanks, whatever they are, but we trust her judgement. Ever since we saw Thalia in action once, Gred and I definitely love the idea of vehicles for familiars!"
A lot of eyes had started shining when Fred had informed that they had taken inspiration from World War II. A lot of eyes went to the clearly German inspired ones. Unfortunately for everyone in the room, Hermione already saw the danger and quickly put her foot down. "We are not getting the thing that looks like the Junkers Ju 88 or the Red Baron like plane! Or the Messerschmidt!"
"But Hermione!"
The Most Impatient Witch of her Age gave Seamus, Justin and the Creeveys a pointed look. "We are not going for the obvious Nazi references, that is just lazy!"
"But fitting, though!" Seamus laughed. "All right then, how about a Spitfire? Or a Hurricane?"
"Better," Hermione stated decidedly.
Issue was, Harry had an idea. "Fine, we will go with one of those then, just to keep you happy. Then we paint a flag onto the plane ourselves – red, white and black with a black snake instead of swastika," those eyes began to glow with mischief. "Instead of 'Heil Hitler', it is 'Heil Thalia'!"
Hermione was dangerously pale at this point. "No, no, no, no, no, no!"
"Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes!" everyone else cackled.
Even Neville was a little pale at this. "Now I might not have taken Muggle Studies but I am pretty certain that doing that is not a good thing."
"Oh no, it is – we turn something evil, into something funny which in turn becomes something evil again but not for the same reasons as the first," Colin chuckled. "It could be really funny!"
"No adapted Nazi flags either!" Hermione stated firmly.
"Fine. Can we make our own with the same colours then?" Ginny suggested.
"Our own?" Dean frowned.
"Yes. So we don't give Hermione a heart attack but we still have our fun," Ginny smirked.
"Yes that does sound like a good idea," the Boy-Who-Was-Glad-That-He-Was-Able-To-Plot-Something-Other-Than-How-Not-To-Die-of-Boredom-In-A-Day responded with his own evil smirk.
"I have concerns," Hermione sighed.
"So do I," Neville added.
"Don't worry, we know what we are doing," George grinned. "Trust me, Thalia will love it – and the others will hate it!"
"His Great Snakiness is going to faint," Fred vowed. "With General Harry's permission, Gred and I will now lay out our plans for the colours for the plane that will be the DE 33 Thalia."
"Oh boy," Dennis commented excitedly. "This should be good!"
"I hope it is hot pink," Seamus grinned.
Both the twins' eyes began to sparkle with mischief and Harry found himself chuckling. It seemed that perhaps Seamus had hit the nail right on the head!
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Umbridge and Fudge have fallen from grace, Melpomene seems to be helping the Slytherins with their music problems and Thalia finally has her plane! How will Voldemort and the Death Munchers react? Stay tuned to find out!
Oh boy this should be utter complete chaos! I cannot wait! Keep all your amazing suggestions coming. They're just pure genius. Also, thank you to the reviewer James Marshall for his initial suggestion of the Muggles meeting Voldemort and his gang in the bowling alley, which I changed ever so slightly.
Do not fret, the Muggle drivers will be back soon! It seems their perspective is rather liked so I will give it again soon. Pranks will also be returning, as will Thalia's puns.
I wanted to give all of you a present; I do hope you like it! Blessed Yule and Merry Christmas! See you all in the next moment of madness
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