Chapter 4

Superman flew to the Fortress of Solitude. Lois' words rang in his ears. She was right; he couldn't always be there to protect her and Jason. It was a painful reality and he didn't like having it thrown in his face. Maybe he should have told Lois he'd been preparing Jason for the awesome responsibility of protecting himself and his mother. His visits with Jason were often much more than father-son bonding. He'd already begun showing Jason how to use his powers against enemies.

Jason had told Superman about pushing the piano at the bad guy to save mommy. That had prompted the beginning of Jason's training. Many times under the guise of Clark Kent taking Jason to the park, Superman had actually flown his son to distant places where they could use their powers without being seen. Yes, Jason knew Superman's secret identity and those outings to the park weren't just fun and games, at least not to Superman. Jason thoroughly enjoyed every moment and particularly liked seeing Superman use his strength to lift or crush things. He hoped one day he would be as strong as his dad.

However, Superman knew better than anyone that if Jason chose the same destiny as he had it meant Jason must be prepared. Jason had to learn to control his powers and use them for good instead of destruction. Sadly, Superman also knew that if Jason chose the same life as his it included great personal sacrifice.

Could that be what was troubling Lois? Could she be thinking about Jason's future and the sacrifices he may have to make one day? I need to tell her that with great sacrifices come great rewards. He wondered if he would get the chance or if this was something Lois needed to learn on her own.

As Superman approached the top of the Fortress he stretched out his arms to slow himself. Once over the top he glided down through a large jagged hole. This was another area that needed to be repaired. The crystal spaceship Superman had created to travel to Krypton in had crashed through the top of the Fortress leaving the huge gaping hole. Superman would repair the damage after retrieving the crystals drifting in space. Retrieving the crystals was his top priority.

First one red boot then the other lightly touched down on the third level of the Fortress. This uppermost level was Superman's personal living area. It contained his bed chamber, kitchen, trophy room, and a living chamber filled with photos, keepsakes, and an extensive library. Since this was the highest level, the ceiling slanted. The living and bed chambers each had one large window offering breathtaking views of the night sky. A high tech, crystal-powered telescope stood under the window in the bed chamber. The telescope Superman had used many years ago at his boyhood home, the Kent farm, was located under the window in the living chamber.

Time alone, Kal-El thought as he entered the bed chamber. Who would have imagined he would want to be alone after spending five years alone in space?

Over the past few months, Kal-El had managed to rebuild relationships with friends and co-workers as Clark Kent, but his relationship with Lois, if one could call it a relationship, wasn't going anywhere. He hadn't been able to really connect with her as Superman or Clark Kent. Yes, she was very generous about letting Jason spend time with him and he truly appreciated that, but building a relationship with his son had been the only bright spot in his life lately.

The painful reality was that Lois remained distant from him, both as Superman and Clark. The love Kal-El and Lois had shared before he left Earth had been so strong and pure that he thought nothing could ever break it. Perhaps he'd been wrong. It hurt to think Lois didn't love him anymore, but each passing day seemed to confirm it.

Kal-El removed his cape and draped it across the foot of the bed. He sat and pulled off his red boots. He stood and peeled off his suit. Moonlight streamed through the unadorned window and highlighted his muscular body. Low lights embedded in the crystalline walls added a soft yellow glow to the chamber.

"A sonic shower to relieve tension and muscles," Kal-El said and headed to the bath chamber. He stepped into the stall and let the warm spray caress his tired body. He wasn't physically tired, he was emotionally drained. The massaging shower felt good and before long he imagined soft hands massaging his body. The thought soon became too painful. That might never be a reality again, he realized and his face twisted in anguish.

Kal-El pressed his forehead against the wall of the stall. "I need to face reality," he said. "It's been six months . . . six long months. It's time I moved on with my life."

The warm water cascaded down his body forming liquid ribbons. "After six months Lois would know if she wanted me back in her life. I've given her enough time to decide."

As difficult as it was, Kal-El had finally decided to forge a new life for himself, a life without Lois. With the decision made, a feeling of relief washed over him.

"I have to move on. I can't live like this. It's killing me." He closed his eyes and let the spray pelt his face and hair.