It was their first kiss, a gentle yet passionate kiss, a memory he would treasure. At least he thought so, until she pushed him away. "Forgive me, it was a mistake."
Sakura did not pin the blame on him, but he felt he had to defend their actions, "it was anything but a mistake." Begging her to understand, this is right.
"IT was a mistake you are married, nothing can come of this." She insisted tears in her eyes.
"Marrying Karin, without a fight was a mistake. One I will always regret," that kiss was not a mistake.
Then she said the words that shattered any hopes he had with her, "I do not want my mother's life, you do not know what it is like." She walked away then not once glancing back, he knew because he did not look away, and could only watch as her back became smaller and smaller.
Sakura was born to a mistress of a rich and influential man, Kizashi Haruno. He did not marry out of obligation, he married for love. His first wife, was kind, caring, and giving. Until she suffered the miscarriages, those tainted her heart. "She changed," her father had told her, "I tried to be there for her, but she was no longer the one I loved."
Then he met Mebuki, "it was not love at first sight, I thought he was just a drunk when I saw him on the street, still I helped him get to his carriage." Her mother had said, "he eventually went back to the area looking for me."
"All I remembered was a woman with the most beautiful green eyes." Her father had interrupted the story, "angry, and mean looking," he added, "but beautiful." The rest was history, eventually their affair began, Sakura was born while her father was married, his wife died when Sakura was six, and soon after he married her mother.
The story the world told was this, Mebuki was clearly a seductress, a whore. She approached Kizashi knowing of his wealth, tricked him into falling for her. Became pregnant to entrap him, after all, it was common knowledge that after years of marriage the Mrs. Had failed to provide a child. Mebuki than used her daughter as weapon, Kizashi had moved them into his home after all, everyone knew he was kind. He would never allow his daughter to be raised away from him, then Mebuki poisoned and killed the first wife.
"Do not listen to them dear," Kizashi often told Sakura. "They know nothing."
"He means well," her mother would tell her in private, "but he does not understand."
Thus, Sakura learned a few things at an early age that most do not. The first was that adults could be crueler to children than anybody else. The second, was that her mother's reputation was as much hers as her mother's. The third was, that a reputation was like an illness it spread.
If you have a good reputation, then those around you must be good people as well. If you have a bad reputation, those around you did as well. She learned this because the rumors surrounding her father's first wife changed, from she was poisoned by the mistress, to she was poisoned by the husband and eventually into she was poisoned by both. Her father's good reputation was damaged as a result of her mothers.
Even so nothing ingrained the fact into her memory quite like her friendship with Ino Yamanaka. Ino had once defended her from the cruelty of other children, she had stood by her unashamedly, "you are also your mother's child! I am my mother's child, why else would they be our mothers?" She shouted at the other kids, the scurried away soon after.
Sakura had never been so grateful in her life, it was unfortunately a short-lived friendship, for eventually things began to be said about Ino. "Mother says a lady has two things to recommend her, her name and her reputation." Ino had been crying, and Sakura had too.
"I understand," but she did not want to understand, that day she told her mother she hated her. Her mother had cried too. Her father had said nothing but went into his study. Sakura was eight years old when her family moved away from the capital.
"It was time for a change of scenery, and business calls me elsewhere." Her father would say, but everyone knew the truth, the reason for the move was Sakura.
A/N: what makes this au fun is that it is supposed to be short updates... a bit of this is inspired by Lydia Bennet. Don't know how many of you have read Pride and Prejudice but just how uncaring she is about her reputation and how damaging the results were or could have been. Except it was Mebuki and Kizashi who were uncaring and Sakura is the one paying for their actions. Sakura telling Mebuki she hated her was really the moment it hit them "hey our daughter is really suffering because of us." They feel bad, it's why Mebuki cries and why Kizashi moves the family away. Mebuki knew ignoring the words was not easy but she is an adult she had not thought of it through a child's perspective, and Kizashi did not understand because men do not have the same stigmas following them around.