Chapter 5: Nightmare

The world was black and white. No color pervaded my sight. I began to wander, not really noticing the scenery that passed me by. Nondescript cats passed me by. Each had dears rolled flat against their skulls. Their heads were held lower at my sight. They'd flinch as I passed. I continued to wander, sensing each and every cat that slipped me by. I simply ignored them. They were beneath my notice… until one bumped into me. How dare he interrupt my walk! In an instant, I found myself slashing at the cat who dared to cross me.

At first, it was just a retaliatory swipe that left a small cut across his brow. But then I noticed it. The blood was red. It was red! I wanted to see more, be red. I slashed at the cat again, staining him further red. Yes. I wanted red. I wanted color. Swipe after swipe, claw after claw, I spread the red. Not caring about the mangled form of my victim, I continued to slash and abuse the body, splashing the walls and surrounding cats in red. Soon, the body would produce no more. It wasn't enough. It wasn't enough! I could still see black on me. It needed to be red. I began looking upon the cats around me. They were filled with red. I could get it and finally be free from the black and white.

I was about ready to go on a rampage when a large tom appeared. He was the biggest cat I'd ever scene, and somehow, I could see him. His form may have been black and white, but I could see the purple of his collar. I could see the faint hue of yellow upon the teeth studding his collar. I could see his green eyes. His eyes met mine and calmed my desire. Colors slowly gained saturation. It was still muted and muddy, but I could see color again.

I looked down at my paws, stained with blood. Below me was the mangled corpse of some unlucky tom that accidentally caught my ire. It wasn't the first time and wouldn't be the last. I stepped over the corpse, licking my white paw clean, taking special care in my claw extensions. As strange as it sounds, I'd named them. There was Cut, Lacerate, Agony, and Wrath.

The tom that calmed me spoke, I know I knew his name, but for the life of me, I could not remember. "Scourge. You did it again. What set you off?"

How could I explain the devoid world? How could I say the absolute need for color, for red? There still were cats here. He knew that. I'd once told him of the colorless world. Why would he ask me this? I needed a more realistic answer. I needed a good lie. "He disrespected me by bumping into me. He was defiant to me, not even fleeing after I gave him a warning scratch. It was a necessary reminder."

The tom nodded in acceptance, clearly acting as if my lie was fact when he clearly knew it was false. Had he been covering for me? "Toss the body onto the road. Make sure a car hits it so the Twolegs don't figure out about us." The tom commanded.

I woke panting. That dream felt so real. I could still feel the dream. That desire for red, I could feel it just beneath my skin. It terrified me. It was still dark out. The darkness muted the colors of the world, and I didn't like it. It felt too much like the dream. My right paw felt light, as if it was missing something. I knew exactly what it was, but I denied it. "That wasn't me. That wasn't me. It couldn't have been me." I muttered to myself, now thoroughly awake and not wanting to fall back into that dream.

I padded out to the camp center, star gazing to pass the time. I could see the faint shimmer of light on the horizon. Dawn would soon approach. I felt a warm pelt press up against me. It was Dad. He didn't look down on me, instead joining me to watch the approaching dawn. But he was black and white. It sparked my urge. I didn't like the black and white. I wanted red! I curled up on myself, trying to suppress the desire. That's when Dad spoke.

"Son, look at me." He mewed in the gentlest tone.

My eyes met his. That familiar green dominated my vision. Green… the color more desirable than red. The desire faded into nothing as I was entranced by Dad's eyes. They freed me from the monster I threatened to become. My fur flattened and my fear subsided.

"Are you alright?" He asked, running his tongue across my head and gently purring to settle my nerves further.

"I'm sorry Dad. I had a nightmare. It felt so real. I… I felt so cold. The world was just colorless. It felt so fake, unnoticeable. Then I cut someone and saw red. I don't understand why I felt it, but I needed to see more, to make everything red. I killed someone, and I was going to do more… I hate this! I hate these dreams! I hate the cat in it. I don't want to be him. I don't…" I ranted, devolving into a crying fit.

"I know. I know. You aren't that cat, and you never will be. I promise. I know your dreams are scary. I'd do anything to make sure you never needed to see them, and I'm sorry I can't do more than be here for you. I know your Father knows about this more than I do, but I'm here for you, and I will continue to be. Just lean against me and listen to my breathing." He consoled.

"You promise?" I asked, still feeling emotional from my outburst.

"I do." He answered gently, but firmly.

His paws wrapped around me as he began to groom me. His gentle purr settled my rattled nerves. I felt my eyes beginning to drift shut. It felt safe. Dad was watching over me, and he would ward off the dream. A welcoming blackness awaited me. The dream would not return this night.