Disclaimers: Naruto is not mine, sadly. This is purely a fanfic using someone else's characters.

Warnings: This story includes strong language, violence, sexual assault, torture, sexual content (yaoi), & angst.

It's All In Your Head

Chapter 85: Clean

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Naruto was able to convince Itachi that he was more than capable of showering and changing out of his cum spattered clothes on his own. The raven looked disappointed, but he agreed to let him be. Though he did insist that he would need to fix up Naruto's hands first.

The blonde was reluctant to accept his help, to give Itachi a reason to touch him, but he knew he was right. He could feel blood pooling in his hands. So much so that it was beginning to slip through the thick bandages, coating his arms in sticky crimson.

Itachi pulled the one lone chair to the edge of the bed and Naruto scooted over to it to meet him. He tried to stand, feeling uneasy staying on the bed he had been violated on, but his captor wasn't having it. He pushed down on his shoulder, forcing him to sit down, and Naruto resigned to doing just that. He knew he would have to choose his battles carefully with Itachi, and this one just wasn't worth it.

Perched stiffly on the edge of the bed, Naruto held out the bloodiest of his hands and looked away as Itachi took it. The raven was careful as he unwrapped it, not wanting to cause his person any harm, which Naruto found to be quite ironic considering what he just did to him- how rough and forceful he had been.

Naruto had already been hurt by him- dressing his wounds with care wouldn't change that.

The wary blonde glanced over when he felt the air brush against his palm and was instantly horrified by what he saw. The stitches Itachi must have done when he was unconscious had torn, revealing deep gory puncture marks. Blood was still pulsing from it, and the skin around it looked ragged. Naruto grimaced at the gruesome sight and looked away.

"Hang on a second." Itachi rushed off to grab some first aid supplies, giving his captive a chance to take a shaky breath and collect himself the best he could. Itachi returned rather quickly, a collection of items in his hands. He deposited them on the bed beside the blonde and quickly got to work.

"Wouldn't it make more sense to do this in the bathroom?" Naruto muttered, still looking for an excuse to get away from the bed.

"It's fine."

Itachi cleaned and disinfected his hand then rubbed a salve over the wound. "To numb the pain" he explained before Naruto could ask. He threaded a needle and expertly stitched his hand together once more. Luckily the salve worked quickly, and he didn't feel the agony he expected. The pain was actually rather dulled, though the feel of his skin being tugged like that made his stomach roll.

Naruto chewed at his lip as he impatiently waited for his warden to finish stitching up both of his ruptured palms, anxious to get away from him. Thankfully Itachi was able to get it done relatively quickly, so he didn't have too long to suffer through.

When the wounds were effectively sutured, Itachi cleaned the rest of the blood from Naruto's hands and applied some sort of antiseptic to keep them from getting infected. Then he bandaged them up tight before sitting back in his chair to examine his work.

"Better?"

Naruto nodded. "Thank you" he mumbled, hating that he felt like he had to say it. That he had to placate his abuser.

Itachi moved the chair back and grabbed some fresh clothes for the blonde- another pair of dark sweatpants and another oversized shirt bearing the Uchiha emblem. Naruto was instantly annoyed, but once again knew better than to voice it. Instead, he kept his mouth shut as he followed the Uchiha out of the room and into the bathroom.

He didn't love that Itachi had joined him inside, but the raven explained that he needed to wrap Naruto's hands in plastic first. "We don't want to get your bandages wet."

Itachi eyed his wrapped hands, and the limited portion of his fingers that were left exposed. "You know.. it's going to be difficult washing yourself like that."

Naruto paled. "It's fine."

"If you need help, will you call for me?"

"I don't need help" Naruto snapped, his voice sharper than he meant for it to be.

He wondered if Itachi would lash out at the sound of it, but he seemed unbothered by the tone. "Well, I'm here if you do" he said.

Itachi had said the same thing the last time he led Naruto into the bathroom- after shoving food in his face and knocking him to the floor. Naruto had ignored the shower back then and used the sound of it to drown out his crying instead, but this time he fully intended to use it. He couldn't stand the feel of Itachi's release on him. He needed every last trace of it gone, and he was desperate for Itachi to leave so he could do just that.

The Uchiha grabbed a couple plastic bags from under the sink, wrapped them securely around the blonde's wrists, and turned on the shower- carefully adjusting the temperature before he was satisfied. When he turned back he went straight to Naruto, took hold of the back of his head, and pulled him close. Naruto tensed, but he didn't fight him on it. He just stayed frozen in his grasp, waiting to see what he would do next.

The raven offered a small smile and kissed the top of his head. "Thank you for earlier" he murmured in his hair.

Naruto forced back tears and continued to say nothing, but Itachi didn't seem to notice that reaction either. He simply straightened, ruffled his hair, and walked out the door- stepping over Naruto's chain along the way.

Naruto desperately wished that the door could close all the way, that he had one place where he could barricade himself for some much needed privacy, but was left quite disappointed when he tried. He did have one idea though that he didn't have last time, which he figured was the best alternative. With the tips of his fingers Naruto pulled more of the chain over to him, making sure he had the length he needed to freely maneuver the bathroom. Then he closed the door tight, wedging several chain links against the doorjamb. It wasn't a perfect solution, but at least now it would take a little more effort for Itachi to just stroll into the bathroom. If nothing else, it would make his presence known, which was far better than being caught off guard by it.

Naruto knew he would still need to be quick about this though. Being naked anywhere near that man was just tempting a cruel fate.

One he'd prefer to avoid.

Naruto hurriedly undressed, pulling the t-shirt down his torso and legs since the collar and attached chain made it pretty impossible to pull it over his head, and tossed it to the side. The shirt was loose enough where it wasn't an issue, and he briefly wondered if that was Itachi's motivation for putting the thing on him in the first place.

He dropped his gaze to the soiled article, the Uchiha print displayed proudly across its back.

Ok, so one of the reasons he had me wear his shirt, he thought wryly.

Showering without functioning hands did turn out to be a bitch, but there was no way in hell he was going to have Itachi help him. So, Naruto just did the best he could as fast as he could. When he was done he used his teeth to loosen the knots around his wrists, freeing his hands from plastic, then dried himself off, and slipped into another pair of loose-fitted clothes that were not his.

He kept the shower on because he didn't have enough strength in his blasted hands to turn the damn thing off. And it wasn't worth tearing open his wounds for. Which is when he also realized that prying open the door might be a bit of an issue- though he would rather put his efforts towards that instead.

The wedged chain turned out to be a lot more effective than he thought. Which was great for keeping a certain someone out, but not so much when it came to leaving. After many failed attempts, Naruto decided that the best strategy was to use his legs. He definitely wasn't making any progress without them, and he figured he could get more leverage that way. With the tips of his fingers, and an ungodly amount of patience, Naruto wrapped the chain around his legs and feet. Then he grabbed hold of his thigh, took a deep breath, and yanked back hard.

Which, on hindsight, he probably should have thought through a little more.

With a yelp Naruto went flying back and crash landed on the hard tiled floor. He groaned at the impact, pain already radiating up his backside and reverberating in his skull. He had managed to half catch himself with his elbows, lessening the damage to his head, but he made up for it with his already bruising arms. And unfortunately the commotion brought an unwanted guest with it, which Naruto was not happy about having again so soon.

Itachi rushed into the now open bathroom and took a knee before the blonde, brows furrowed with concern. "Are you ok?"

Naruto pushed himself up on his elbows, wincing when the pressure only made it worse. "Y-yeah, I'm fine."

Which was of course less than convincing.

Itachi didn't wait for an invitation to help. Without comment he hooked his arms under Naruto's and easily hefted him to his feet. Naruto found his footing quickly, but Itachi was still holding onto him- reluctant to let go.

"Umm.. you can let go now."

Itachi's dark eyes flitted between Naruto's nervous blues, studying whatever it was he saw in them, before he finally removed his hands and stepped back. Which Naruto was equally shocked and relieved by.

And that feeling only escalated when Itachi walked away from him- before Naruto even had the chance to beg him to.

Huh..

Naruto hesitated, wondering after the sudden change. Then another thought occurred to him.

You should take advantage of this.

Itachi was suddenly being.. well, he wasn't sure exactly. More reasonable? Less overbearing? Less terrifying?

More human.

Not by much, unless you kept your standards for that incredibly low, but it was still a nice change of pace from what he was being before. Maybe something was clicking. And if that was the case, Naruto might be able to convince him to go a step further with it.

His mind made up, Naruto walked out of the bathroom and further into the hallway. His chain didn't let him get very far, but he was able to see into the main living area now. It reminded him a lot of the last hideout Itachi had kept him in but only because the furniture seemed just as outdated and rather minimal, and the space was relatively open. The wooden rafters above were definitely unique to this one, as well as the ivy winding down another long wall. Everything seemed hand carved and textured. The couch was a lump of forest green tucked beside a large dusty window, and the wide cushy chair across from it was a contrasting autumn shade- the color of disintegrating leaves and insistent rust.

The kitchen area was much smaller too. It was equipped with a little stove, an old beige-colored fridge, and a surprisingly clean sink with a deep basin. There were a couple cabinets tucked between them, ligneous and scarred, made from the same wood as the dining table. Which is where Naruto spotted the Uchiha, sitting in a chair pulled back from it, mindlessly sharpening a kunai.

"Did you put up a barrier?" Naruto asked, getting straight to the point.

Itachi raised a brow and looked over at him. "Why do you ask?"

"If you did, you don't need to chain me up like this" Naruto answered, choosing to be blunt. "This thing already keeps me from using any chakra" he went on, gesturing to the collar. "If there's a barrier around this place, I won't be able to go anywhere anyways."

He scanned the Uchiha's face, but his expression was calm and smooth. Utterly inexpressive. Not helpful, but Naruto decided to push forward anyways.

"If.. if you take off the chain, I can join you" he tried, nodding to the empty chair at the table.

Itachi studied his face silently for a moment before rising to his feet. He walked over to the blonde, still completely unreadable. "And I'm supposed to believe that you want to?"

Naruto gave him a questioning look. "Don't you?"

Itachi stopped before him, dark eyes penetrating. Naruto shivered beneath them.

"No" Itachi replied. "I don't."

Naruto's brows furrowed. "I don't understand." He looked up, searching. "..Itachi?"

"Why do you say it like you don't know?"

Because I don't.

He didn't say it, wasn't sure he was allowed to say it, but the feeling was there. Because this definitely wasn't the Itachi who professed his love and aggressively jerked off on top of him. No, the person he was looking at now wasn't the same man who had convinced himself that his fantasies were real- that Naruto belonged to him, that he wanted to be with him.

This was an Itachi he recognized.

"You just seem.. different."

"I see."

The words he said, the way he said it. The look in his eyes and the dispassionate expression all around it.

This had to be him.

The real Itachi.

Would have been nice if he came back when his psycho puppet was trying to FUCK me, but sure- make a full return now.

"Do you.. feel different?" Naruto asked quietly, wondering how far he should push this.

Itachi raised a brow. "Than?"

Naruto shuffled his feet, feeling awkward. "Than.. how you were before. In the.. in the other room."

"The bathroom?"

Naruto gave him a questioning look. "Do you really not know what I'm talking about?"

Itachi's face was still impossible to read, but it didn't seem like he was lying. Though, would he be able to tell if he was? Naruto thought Itachi was a bad liar back when he was his prisoner two years ago, but there was plenty he had kept from him.

Maybe he had been wrong all along.

Maybe he never was able to read him.

Maybe he only ever saw what Itachi wanted him to see.

"If you are trying to insinuate that I did something to you when you were unconscious, I can assure you that you are mistaken" Itachi said coldly. "You were covered in blood and badly wounded. All I did was change your clothes and bandage your hands. The chain was just a way to keep you from escaping while I put up the barrier incase you regained consciousness- nothing more."

Naruto blinked. "You're serious?"

Something flashed in Itachi's dark eyes, something akin to anger. He leaned down, bringing their faces level. When Naruto took an unsteady step back, Itachi roughly grabbed his jaw- forcing him to stay put. And for their eyes to meet.

"Why don't you just come out and say what you want to say" Itachi growled. "Or would you prefer I find it myself."

A hint of red gleamed in his eyes, a reminder that he was more than capable of using his Mangekyou to invade Naruto's thoughts.

The blonde swallowed hard. At first he thought it might be better to just show him. For Itachi to understand why he was so bewildered, for him to see what his vessel had done, but he quickly shoved the impulse away. The last thing he needed was to put the idea in his head. Especially if it wasn't there already.

Naruto didn't want to risk bringing that inhuman version of Itachi back to the surface. So, for now, he would avoid mentioning anything that had to do with him. He still didn't understand what was going on, why Itachi suddenly seemed like himself again, but he found he was relieved to see it. Itachi had his faults, many in fact, and Naruto was still afraid of him because of how far he had gone but at least this Itachi regretted it.

Naruto wondered if something in Itachi's mind had clicked and the real him was there to stay, or if he would fade away for a while like he had before and his twisted alter ego would step in to take his place. He hoped for the former, but he couldn't help but expect the latter. Since he couldn't be sure one way or the other, he would just have to proceed cautiously and keep his guard up.

Which meant he absolutely could not tell Itachi the truth.

"I just.." fuck, what do I say?

"I'm listening."

Itachi's eyes reddened even more, and Naruto felt a rush of urgency.

"I don't like feeling like your prisoner" he said, piecing the words together as he spoke. "Can you just get rid of the chain?"

Itachi studied him closely, his eyes narrowed. Naruto held his breath, waiting to see if he would believe him. And if he would agree to it. His hope was on the verge of collapsing when the raven finally spoke.

"Fine. But understand this." His grip on Naruto's jaw tightened. "That collar won't come off without me. Kabuto may have made it effective against tailed beasts, but he did not think to seal it."

His eyes darkened. "I did."

Naruto knew perfectly well what he meant, because his brother had done the same thing to him. When Sasuke attacked him while under Orochimaru's control, Naruto had been powerless to get away because the chain and shackle on his leg had been fortified with Sasuke's chakra. A skill that he had only ever seen with the Uchihas.

"This is not new information" Naruto said, unable to keep the sarcastic tone out.

"Is that so.."

"You did the same thing before" Naruto muttered. "You replaced Sasuke's seal with your own. This is.. this is just like back then."

Itachi considered the blonde for a moment longer before finally releasing him. He walked back to the table, pocketed his weapons, then returned before him.

"If you try anything, I'll put this chain back on you. And next time your leash will be a lot shorter."

Message received. Naruto had no intention of giving Itachi a reason to tie him down to a bed. If that meant he had to play nice for a while, then so be it.

The blonde nodded, and Itachi reached out and took hold of the chain connected to his prisoner. He murmured an incantation under his breath and dragged two fingers down part of its length, starting at the link connected to the collar and moving several inches down. A blue glow emanated from the thick steel, just for a moment, and when Itachi's voice quieted the light dispersed. The raven expertly flicked out a kunai, spinning it in his fingers, then sliced cleanly through the now weakened chain.

The steel links fell heavily to the floor and Itachi tucked away his knife once more. "Satisfied?"

Naruto gingerly felt along the collar, where just a few inches of severed chain remained. He still didn't have his chakra, Kurama was still entirely out of reach, but he was free now. Well, as free as Itachi would allow. He was free from that horrible fucking bed. Free to close and lock the bathroom door. Maybe even free enough to step outside.

"Thank you" he breathed.

Itachi seemed surprised by his genuine thanks, but he didn't comment on it. He simply walked back to the table and took a seat, prepared to go back to the same mindless task he had been doing before. He pulled out his sharpening stone and another kunai, then looked over at the blonde. With his charcoal eyes still locked on him, he shoved the extra chair out with his foot, pulling Naruto's attention to it.

"Are you still joining me" he said smoothly. "Or was that just a ploy to get me to do what you wanted?"

Naruto's face reddened, slightly embarrassed to be called out like that. He walked over and took a seat, feeling awkward. He fumbled with the hem of his shirt, twisting the dark material in his hands as he searched for something to say.

"Do you remember what I showed you before I died?" Itachi said quietly.

Naruto's eyes widened. He hadn't expected for him to bring it up- not this Itachi, and not so soon. He didn't even have the chance to think through what he might say about it. "I.."

"So yes" he answered for him.

Naruto's eyes slid away as he nodded.

"And even after all of that, you're still so afraid of me."

Naruto's head shot up, a flame burning in his eyes. "I'm not afraid of you!"

Which was bullshit, and they both knew it.

"It's clear that you are. I'm just not sure why."

Naruto didn't know how to respond to that, but Itachi wasn't done. "Kabuto's resurrection jutsu wasn't something I would have chosen for myself, but it is not something to fear."

"That's not it.." Naruto murmured.

"Naruto, I know that I hurt you in the past. And I do regret that-."

"Then why am I here, Itachi?" Naruto cut in. "Why make me your prisoner again when you regretted the last time you did it?!"

Naruto knew that Itachi could hear his growing fury, and he didn't bother hiding it. He needed him to understand that this wasn't ok. It wasn't something he wanted. And it wasn't something that Itachi should put him through again.

"I don't know" the raven admitted. "I just feel like it's something I need to do."

"That's not good enough!" Naruto threw his head back, forcing away tears as he glared up at the wooden slates bearing down on him. "Itachi, I don't want to be here."

"I'm well aware of that, Naruto."

"Then why won't you let me leave?" he choked.

"I already told you. Some part of me is saying that I shouldn't. And I feel like I need to trust it."

"You shouldn't" Naruto said under his breath, not meaning for the raven to hear it but he did anyways.

Obsidian eyes hardened. "What do you mean by that?"

Naruto tilted his head to the side, meeting his gaze. "You're making the same mistakes you made before." His brows furrowed, pain and disgust curling his lips. "Is that really what you want?"

Itachi carefully kept his face neutral, once more making him impossible to read. "I suppose I have time to figure that out now."

Which is exactly what Naruto was worried about.

That inner voice spewing these ideas in Itachi's head was the delusional version of him. If he started to listen to those thoughts, to embrace them as his own, it wouldn't matter which 'Itachi' Naruto faced- they would all be the same. A truly terrifying thought. One he hoped to combat by getting Itachi to listen to him too.

Naruto wondered which would prove to be stronger- the voice of the person that Itachi truly did care about..

.. or the unknowingly cruel one still trapped in his head.

Author Note:

Ok, my darlings and ducklings, how are we feeling so far?

By a show of hands, how many of you are getting pretty exhausted by all of the 'It's All In Your Head' examples happening in this story? Did I overdo it and your patience with me is imploding, or are you loving the pun and looking for me to drag it out even more!

--

"Neigh."

"Hmm?"

"Ahemm. Neigh."

"They hate it.."

~*horse nod*

"And they hate what's happening right now."

~*horse nod repeated*

"…great."