Haikyuu!
Higher
Chapter 02: Apathy

Sugawara walked away from practice with his head hung.

It'd only been a day since the Aoba-Josai match was announced, and since Kageyama was said to be the full-time setter, especially over Sugawara, who was a third year. He wouldn't lie and say that he wasn't upset, but he knew that Kageyama was much better technically than he was. Even knowing that, it still hurt to know that he wouldn't be on the court with his team.

"I heard that the lineup for Aoba-Josai was finalized today. And I heard that their demands were for Kageyama to play as a setter." He turned to see Yamada standing at the door of the Foothill Store, sipping on a can of coffee.

He nodded. "Yeah, that's true. But how'd you hear that?" he asked.

She sighed, pulling the can away from her lips. "I heard Tsukishima and Yamaguchi talking about it. Something about Aoba-Josai and Kita-First? And a grudge match between Kageyama and someone else?" She frowned. "It's not any of my business, but I was wondering how you were feeling."

"I'm doing fine. Honestly, it's really not much of a bother. Kageyama's a good setter, too. Better than me. It's… really fine…"

Trailing off at the end of his sentence, he felt his face falling. He could feel tears pricking at the corners of his eyes. He hated feeling like that, because he knew that he was being selfish. He wanted to be the one to take a victory against such a prestigious team, but for some reason, his best suddenly wasn't enough. It would unnerve anyone, being benched for a genius freshman, whose natural talents extended beyond the two years of experience he had. His entire being was in pain.

Sugawara didn't like to think of himself as someone who was prideful, but he was still a man. He still wanted to compete and be the best at what he did, even if there was nothing he could do to match the natural talent of a genius setter.

"You don't have to lie, you know. I know how it feels." She tossed the can into the air, batting it like one would when serving a ball as she aimed towards the trash can. It clattered against the trash can, but landed cleanly at the bottom. "To have your position taken from you when you're not ready to leave the court yet."

Her words were filled with an incredible amount of pain. She reached down towards her leg, her white bandages standing out against her skin. Sugawara followed her gaze, seeing her wince as she touched her leg. Her hand curled into a fist, and she pulled it away from her leg, holding it close to her chest, like the bandages had burned her.

"Can I ask what happened to you?"

His words had left his mouth before he could even think about them. It was unlike him, but he was curious. After all, it seemed like no one else had known, even though she was such a prolific player, especially for someone on a girls' volleyball team.

She sighed. "I'm shocked that none of you asked sooner," admitted Aika, tucking a loose strand of hair behind her ear. "Honestly, it's my own damn fault. I kept pushing myself too much, and going for saves or jumps that I wouldn't normally go for, especially when I became the pillar of the team in my second year. I pulled my hamstring in my right leg. It wasn't so bad at first, and it healed quickly." She frowned, crossing her arms uncomfortably.

Sugawara bit his lip, nearly hesitating. "A Grade 1, then? So it wasn't so bad?" he assumed, looking down at her bandages.

"Not really. I felt fine, so I went back to playing."

"… I'm guessing it got worse."

Nodding, Aika crossed her arms, looking upset at herself. "During the prefectural preliminaries, the final game before nationals… I did a jump serve. It was something that always worked on any opponent in any game, and it scared a lot of people. I got a lot of points from it, but I forgot that my doctor told me not to work too hard. As a result, I ended up stressing my legs too much from jumping. When I kept serving like that, I pulled it for good. It was a Grade 3 this time, and it took me out permanently. I got operated on over the break, but the surgeon said that it wouldn't let me play like I used to. If I did, I wouldn't be able to move quickly, spike, or perform a jump serve," she explained.

The silver-haired setter nodded in understanding. "I get it. You couldn't play after that. I'm sorry for asking. It must've brought up bad memories," he apologized.

"No, it's fine. I'm okay now. I'm looking for new clubs to join. Maybe I'll even join the girls' team as a manager or something."

"What about us?" Sugawara suddenly blurted. "We don't have a coach, and you know a lot about the game, and Hinata could use help, and so could everyone else, and…" He trailed off at her amused look. "I'm rambling, aren't I?"

She shrugged, giggling softly. "A little." She pushed her hair out of her face again. "I'm grateful for the offer, but I don't think that I'll join your team. It looks like Shoyo doesn't need me anymore."

"What? What makes you think that?"

Aika looked rather uncomfortable, but Sugawara couldn't hide his surprise. From what he understood, Aika was practically the reason that Hinata knew whatever he did. His technical ability was nowhere near that of Kageyama's or Tsukishima's, but he knew what he was doing.

Sugawara thought back to the conversation they had the previous day, during their dinner at the Foothill Store, their first outing as a team.

"Hinata," Sugawara asked as they all sat around the Foothill Store. "You know what you're doing, but your technique is off in some ways. Where'd you learn to play?"

He didn't mean to hurt Hinata's feelings, but the orange-haired boy seemed to get downcast. He glanced around the small store, and sighed. Clearly, he was looking for something, or someone, that wasn't quite there. The look in Hinata's eyes was, for once, lost.

"I only started playing in middle school," he admitted quietly. "My first year, I saw the Tiny Giant play on television, and I wanted to be just like him. I wasn't good, though. There was no boys' team at Yukigaoka, and I didn't want to play with the girls, 'cause I wasn't a girl. I practiced by myself a lot. But at the end of my second year, I met Aika. She taught me a lot about the game, stuff that only people who played knew. She was a great coach but… she never wanted to play with me. She tossed me balls when she felt okay, but she mostly taught me the basics. She's never… missed one of my practices…"

It was clear that Hinata was missing something. It was clear to Sugawara and to everyone else that Hinata was incredibly reliant on Aika Yamada as a player. It was clear that he had learned a lot from Aika, and had expected her to be there, to tell him what he needed to fix or what he did well.

On the first day, Aika Yamada had come off as a bit of a pushover for Hinata.

But as she'd kept going to practice, she didn't talk to anyone but Sugawara, who had tried to get her to open up. She'd ensured that Hinata was practicing, and that he'd get a chance to be a part of the team, but did nothing else. She just observed.

"So, you miss her?" Sugawara guessed.

Hinata nodded, poking at his meat bun. "It's not… just that. It's just that we swore that we'd make it this year. We'd… we'd both be part of Karasuno, and we'd make it all the way to Nationals. She promised she'd be there with me. I thought she'd be here with me."

He looked so sad that even Kageyama held some pity for the usually perky and annoying orange-head. Aika was clearly the person who pushed him to become better than he had been in middle school. It must've been strange not to have his best friend since middle school with him anymore.

"Hinata." He turned to Sugawara. "I'm sure she'll be back."

Hinata managed the best smile that he could. "Yeah. Aika always comes back."

"Hinata… he needs you more than he needs anyone. He misses you a lot!" Sugawara exclaimed, looking at Aika desperately. "He wants you to see him soar, and be there when he keeps his promise! He wants you at his side!"

She shook her head, her long, red hair flying around her face. "You don't get it, Sugawara senpai. I'm a setter that can't set. I'm useless to Shoyo."

"You're his best friend. You're anything but useless," he shot back.

"Sugawara senpai." Her voice was sharp, almost cold. "With all due respect, this isn't your business whether I stand by Shoyo or not. He has the rest of Karasuno now. I am no longer all he needs."

Sugawara couldn't help but frown at her stubbornness. "But that doesn't mean he doesn't need you," he murmured.

For a moment, Aika was silent as she picked up her bag from the ground. She dropped it in the basket of her bike, grabbed the handles, and walked past Sugawara without even saying a word to him. Her hair fluttered behind her as she walked past him.

"Sorry, senpai. But unless something drastic happens, there's no need for me to be there. Shoyo can grow without my help. I'll just drag him down if I stay."

"Yamada!"

She could hear him calling for her, even after she walked away from him. She kept walking towards the road she took to get home, her bike wheels turning next to her. She paused for a moment as she saw a mop of black hair in an all-black school uniform standing next to her.

"Kageyama," she nodded towards him.

"Yamada." He paused, looking towards her. "Hinata looked for you again today."

"I was doing something else. I was a bit too busy to watch him today."

"He's a mess. He has no technical skill whatsoever, and he hits the ball entirely on instinct. He keeps receiving the balls to his face," he deadpanned. "What the hell have you been teaching him the past year? How to serve?"

She rolled her eyes. "Surprisingly, yes."

"You should be there to correct him. He's useless as is. It's all he can do to pull off those quicks we do. It won't be enough to win against Aoba-Josai."

Aika paused. "What about the rest of the team? Aren't they all good at something? They can cover for Shoyo," she protested.

"The freshmen suck at receiving, and the rest… we don't have a libero or a powerful spiker. We have Hinata and Tanaka for spiking, and that's about it."

"And what do you want me to do about it?"

Kageyama froze for a moment. He'd come to her in order to try to convince her to come to practice, just so Hinata would cheer up, so he would stop looking for her every time that he wasn't being called upon to do something. The perky boy being so lost was bringing everyone down, and no one wanted to see him frown or look so sad.

He'd come to her to fix that, but he still didn't know what he could possibly say. She was stubborn, and hard to talk to. She clearly wouldn't do anything that she didn't want to do, and if she didn't want to go to the boys' team's practice, then she wouldn't.

"Just come to a game. Our game. The one against Aoba-Josai. Watch us, and you can decide if our team sucks from there." She didn't respond. "It's just a practice game, but… I'm sure that Hinata would be happy if you came. He'd probably play better if he saw you there."

It was Aika's turn to freeze. She froze, taking a deep breath as she frowned. "I'll… think about it."

Kageyama nodded. "Tuesday. Be at the gym before school. I'll make sure you can be on the bus with us," he said shortly as he turned away.

He left Aika staring after him.

Shoyo… you really got yourself a good partner, didn't you? The two of you are going to go far.

Kageyama stood outside the bus on Tuesday morning, waiting for Yamada to show. He was sure that she'd be there. Even though she was stubborn and practically unfriendly, she was a good friend to Hinata. She'd been there when he'd lost in middle school, and she'd stayed with him through high school.

"Kageyama… we'll be late if we don't leave soon."

He turned to Sawamura and bowed lowly. "Please! Five more minutes! I'm sure that they'll come!" he practically shouted, his voice ringing through the courtyard.

The captain smiled sympathetically. "If you say so." It was clear that he had no faith in whoever it was that their new setter was waiting for.

In fact, their new setter was losing faith quite quickly, as well. "C'mon, Yamada… you're coming, aren't you?" he murmured. No one answered him. His hands curled into fists, and he turned away to get on the bus.

"Kageyama!" He suddenly whirled around to see the redhead walking towards him, a large bag in her hand. He turned midway up the stairs of the bus, and ran to meet her. She held up the bag as he approached, a small smile on her face, one that made her look much more approachable than she did a few days prior. "Sorry I'm so late. I ran to get some stuff from the Foothill Store. Although, I guess running wasn't such a good idea. My leg is kind of acting up again."

He sighed. "Stupid. For as smart as you are, you can be dumb," he said.

"My brother says the same thing. But sometimes, he's right." She continued to walk along, her cane thumping against the ground as she limped towards the bus.

Rushing to her side, he offered her his arm. "Let me help you. You're struggling just to walk." He paused, glancing down at her leg. "You pulled your hamstring, right? Can't most people go back to competing normally after a few months?"

She paused in her walking, nearly causing Kageyama to step on her foot. "You over heard my conversation with Sugawara senpai, didn't you?" He looked away from her sheepishly. "I'm not mad. I'm just surprised that you didn't say anything prior to now."

"It's not my business. But I'm curious."

She sighed and moved to continue walking. Kageyama followed after her slowly, his pace lessening to allow her to keep up with him. "If you were listening closely, you'd know that I pulled my hamstring twice. It's just the amount of time between the injuries. I pulled it twice in less than two months," she admitted nonchalantly.

"You were back in competition after only two months?"

She nodded. "It was only a minor tear. I was back in a matter of weeks. I went back in order to keep us in the finals. For a chance to go to nationals. But it wasn't enough." She looked as if she was about to curse herself. "We lost as soon as I was taken to the hospital. I tried to be my entire team, and it wasn't enough. I learned too late what it meant to work as a team."

Kageyama's gaze shifted down. He knew what she meant when she said that she learned too late. He was the same, back in middle school.

"I understand."

And he did.