Chapter 2: I might... I can't! I shouldn't! I must...

They had chatted about anything and everything, during breaks and in the common room, these past few weeks, so November had passed and Christmas was approaching.

Albus had lots of studying and prefecting to do and Nerya had swiftly become very popular amongst girls and boys in their year, but without clearly favouring someone's company over someone else's.

However, both she and Albus gravitated towards each other once in a while, and the time they spent together passed very similarly to the first day of their acquaintance, if not with a bit more familiarity as the weeks passed. They talked about school and books and life, but never for long enough for Albus to learn anything substantial about her personal background, her life and home; what he had managed to pick up, however, was quite enough to confuse him even more.

The riddle had started properly the very first evening Nerya spent in the common room.

''Not tired yet, I take it?''

Nerya raised her eyes from her book and saw Albus stopping in front of the fireplace, a few paces to her right; he was facing the fire and warming his hands, but his head was turned to her direction and he was wearing a small smile.

''I would have supposed you'd be in bed already; a first day is usually a long day.'' He smirked.

''Nah, I don't get tired easily. And when you have a gracious host,'' she tilted her head towards him with a smirk of her own, ''that makes your first day much easier.'' He chuckled slyly and returned his gaze to the flames. ''Thank you for the book too; Hogwarts, a History is indeed a great way to start acclimatizing.''

''Glad to hear it;'' his gaze didn't leave the flames, ''but considering you survived the thoughtful questioning of our peers, I don't worry about your fitting in.'' he tried to push the reproach 'I'm such a hypocrite' to the back of his mind.

Nerya smiled in amusement and closed her book. ''How come you're up so late? Everyone else turned in about an hour ago.''

''Prefect's duty; I'll have to start my rounds in 10 minutes.''

''10 minutes is a long time to stand in front of the fireplace.'' She raised a brow, chuckled silently and smiling innocently, extended a hand to invite him to the armchair next to hers.

''Oh, alright then…!'' Albus replied as if he was accepting the tenth chocolate frog in a row. He settled with a sigh of contentment and turned to her with a smile. ''So, Russia?'' his eyes twinkled excitedly.

Nerya took a deep breath through the nose and her eyes fluttered away for a second. ''Yeeeah.'' She shook her head in the affirmative but finished dismissively, ''well, sort of, anyway.''

''Sort of Russia! Now, that's what I call an interesting and precise reply.'' His tone was that of mild interest but his lips betrayed the faintest wry smile. He had of course heard Nerya earlier, answering the same question by his classmates in the same way; he had thought it strange, and at the same time couldn't help but be amused, when she wriggled out of giving more details, by using the phrases 'about a mile away from the European border' and 'you wouldn't know it anyway.' His peers, far more excited for juicy gossip than dry fact, had let it slide.

Nerya shot him a glare, ''Oh, shut up,'' but her lips twitching into a smile betrayed her amusement. Albus smirked devilishly and moved with the flow of the silence; 'where do you come from' wasn't an indiscreet question in his books. After a few moments of Nerya trying to glare, she sighed resignedly, ''Alright, if you want to stay at such a mundane topic…''

Albus just clapped his hands excitedly and then settled with a politely interested face, as he heard her talk about where the town was, how was it called and other general information.

''And what about your accent, if I may ask? It's so light, I would have thought you haven't lived in Russia for years!'' he asked after a while.

''My parents thought it important for my English to be as perfect as possible. I started lessons very young and my teacher was adamant where pronunciation was concerned. I also had in mind to visit Hogwarts for some years now, for fun and for my OWLs, so I kept working on it.''

That's what she had answered, in a simple tone, with a shrug and a shadow of a smile. Albus understood by her tense shoulders - which she tried to conceal and would have succeeded if it wasn't for his scrutiny- that it would be impractical to push anymore, and as the time for his rounds was swiftly approaching, they said their goodnights and went their ways.

There was nothing strained or uneasy about her general behaviour. In and out of the classroom, the only thing everyone had to say was that she was a normal teenage girl, very bright and talented and 'nothing more to see here'. Albus, on the other hand, scoffed at this understatement of the century, but tried not to focus on the long list of what he considered her exceptional characteristics. Instead he turned his attention to the little things here and there that didn't quite fit in to the whole picture. He didn't dare to say it out loud of course, not even to himself, but he also had a sort of feeling, right from their first meeting, that Nerya wasn't just what she seemed to be. Still, all this had Albus tilting his head in interest and wanting to examine her closer.

For example, there were her friends and family. The information was there alright, but Albus felt that something was missing. On the rare occasions that Nerya had said something about them, she had chosen her words carefully, her manner reminding him of that first evening. Albus tried to see if she was lying, tried to find inconsistencies or guilt in her eyes. He couldn't spot any of the first and her eyes weren't guilty exactly, more like reserved. She certainly didn't have the same ease she had when she spoke about anything else.

During some of their more private moments, he had even considered using a bit of Legillimency, but he was still very new to the art and didn't dare to try it on her, lest he were too blunt and made her uncomfortable (meaning, he was betrayed and humiliated). And on the other hand, Nerya had been careful, guarded, but that didn't exactly give him substantial grounds to go poking inside her head. After all, he was also careful and guarded when it came to the details of his life. Still, the puzzle was too sweet to leave it alone; with great discretion he tip-toed around, watched and studied.

On a more positive note, she had opened up about more personal stuff. She had hinted at her lonely childhood, her difficulty to fit in back home. Her sharings were always short, possibly because the circumstances of their conversations were not allowing much in the way of privacy, and certainly not for long. But her words had flown with more ease, her air lacked the reservedness of the family-and-friends subject. Those words, Albus thought he could trust.

''Well you could have fooled me.'' Albus admired. ''You have them all on the palm of your hand here.''

''You are speaking as if the same isn't true for you!"

Albus smirked arrogantly. ''Point taken, but I've known this people for years. And yet, here you are, conquering what I considered undoable. I had never seen Leela Parkins stay quiet for more than five minutes when in society and yet yesterday she didn't open her mouth for a whole hour. And I literally timed her.''

''I thought you were writing that essay for potions, you sly man!'' she responded playfully.

''I was trying, but her silence threw me off. I had grown accustomed to having her voice audible in the background.'' Albus joked with a straight face.

Nerya chuckled. ''I guess she really liked that French magazine.''

Albus had time only to roll his eyes in mock exasperation, before the lesson had started.

What at the first day had been natural curiosity, in the weeks that passed became an on-going, private character study; Albus laughed at the almost creepiness of his almost obsession sometimes, but he wasn't one to stop until a matter had been fully understood; and in this case, he agreed with his classmates: dry facts were certainly not enough.

There was something strange about Nerya, and Albus couldn't quite put his finger on it. The fact that, after all those weeks and all his efforts, he was still lacking any substantial, conclusive answers was driving him more and more mad, but it fuelled his curiosity and determination even more so.

Her magic was very much like her; Such light and gentleness, but always quick and easy. They had practiced a bit of non-verbal magic together and both were more or less on the same level. But Nerya's ability in wandless magic, something that he had discovered by accident, was far beyond what a typical – and most atypical - 5th years could achieve.

That, along with the circumstances on which Nerya had performed wandless spells, struck Albus as very strange indeed. On the two or three instances that this had occurred, it was like she had forgotten herself; her magic had slipped before she could contain it. Every time she had quickly regained control and upon her noticing his stare she had playfully dismissed it, by putting a finger on her lips and winking at him.

Yes, that was strange. But, on the other hand, she is a very clever and talented individual, Albus reasoned, and her parents must be very meticulous on the matter of her education, if their conviction about their daughter's English was any sign. And about wanting to keep it quiet, it was also reasonable not wanting to attract too much of that sort of attention. Not a conclusive answer, he sighed tiredly, but valid points.

And Nerya was in the centre of a lot of attention, as it was. 'In the public's opinion, she is a pretty, foreign, clever and not shy girl; exactly what people find easy to be around', Albus had thought with a frown. She didn't exactly crave it though, Albus had further noticed, because he often found her alone at a corner of the common room, reading or writing; and when she was in company, she didn't show off or needily draw too much attention on herself. It was her presence and the circumstances around her that made her so popular, more than her own intention and wish, Albus supposed.

That didn't mean of course, that his first observations in the Great Hall were wrong. A few times, he had perceived her patience wearing thin, under some occasions that Albus would have described as a bit frivolous, not very mind-challenging. With amusement he endeavoured to hide, he had witnessed her either slip away under some pretence like fatigue, or if she couldn't manage that, wear an interested expression and soldier on.

Albus barely refrained from snorting at the fact that the people present were none the wiser.

She could handle a crowd, without seeming patronizing or condescending. She was nice and funny without snobbing anyone, and she seemed to know how to adjust her behaviour under different circumstances. Very rarely Albus met someone who could manage such a balance, who could separate so easily their public image from their true character. Who understood the importance of appearances if you wanted to survive in the world, and had the diplomatic skills and brainpower to achieve it. But how could she have gained such excellent social skills, if she was home-schooled?

Each time together, although not providing satisfactory answers, made Albus' head light and his stomach warm. Most of the times, his usual excuses about those novel reactions were enough to ease his pestering conscience; he mumbled about how he was confused, puzzled and lost in his efforts to find the answer to her riddle. When those excuses failed, he followed a different style of approach.

'I enjoy talking to someone so much like myself!' he retorted exasperatedly, 'what in the name of Merlin's sagging balls is wrong with that?'

He must have gotten his curiosity for Nerya and her peculiar effect on him under control though, because after that first evening in the Great Hall, Albus hadn't noticed anyone fussing about it. Elphias, other than mumbling about how ''bloody gorgeous'' she was and an occasional drooling stare at her, had never brought it up again either.

Protective wall on then. If his façade had ever slightly altered his behaviour towards or around Nerya when other people were present, making it in any way different from when they were alone – not a very common occasion really- Nerya didn't seem to take any offence. Thank Merlin's long johns for their similarities indeed! It is so refreshing to not have to explain everything, to not fear that you will be misunderstood!

She had, in fact, shot him a few playful glances during some of those more crowded occasions, her violet eyes intense, smiling knowingly; possibly an acknowledgement of his façade. Not that Albus was lacking such reflexes himself. Oh, when he heard the lilt in her voice implying something more than what her lips described, or when she used words with such beautiful, masterful ambiguity! She was clever, sweet Circe, so clever and gentle at the same time that sometimes he could barely restrain the flow of wonder from his eyes, edging to break into his face.

So he lay in the privacy of his bed, trying to work out the puzzle that was this brilliant Nerya, so positively radiant with light, like a full moon on a clear night, that it still took his breath away, even though almost two months had passed.

In the girls' dormitories, Nerya was looking at her canopy too, although less puzzled than Albus. She was happy to be here, after all. She came on her own volition, that much was true, but she hadn't expected to find everything so refreshingly different here. It was very liberating that her identity wasn't already fixed, and that she could choose who she wanted to be, instead of having to comply with expectations already set for her. She had also found that the norms and etiquettes of this society suited her personality much more than the ones defining her home. That was a welcome surprise.

She had no problem with acting the student part, she was always fond of learning, and for whatever demanded knowledge from earlier years, she could just blame her home-schooling. So, with a bit of extra effort and attentiveness, and of course strategic avoidance of certain topics, she could follow the classes with no problem and with great fascination.

She also found the everyday use of magic here very interesting. She had bought her wand and practiced with it before she came to Hogwarts. Familiarising herself with it reminded her very much of the process of learning another language. It was like having two options of expressing what is inside you, English or Quenya, wand or wandless. She knew of the magic within her, every one of her people knew, they just didn't use it like wizards did. The only problem with having a stick in your hand when you channel your magic, or "will" as they called it back home, to a certain intent, was the getting use to its seeming a bit silly. But she quickly got passed her prejudice.

Another surprise was the people. Not as thick or straightforward and definitely more interesting to study than how they described them back home. She hadn't really met any 'muggles', as she was informed they were called, but the magical and non-magical population were all humans, so how different could they be? Maybe, during the millennia since her people's departure, humans had grown into something more complicated, but she didn't at all dismiss the possibility that her people had overlooked the human worth in the first place.

Nevertheless, her family was right to direct her towards the Wizarding World, because she supposed that among muggles it might have been more difficult to pass unnoticed and the fact that she didn't have to hide her magic made it easier not to be so on guard all the time. She was however, proud of herself that she had managed to integrate smoothly into her new surroundings, without any unpleasant occurances.

Smoothly. This word guided her mind to Albus and in a contradictory way. Yes, he was sweet, clever and playful. It had struck her, how he understood her so well, although he knew practically nothing about her. That should have made her wary, she thought sometimes; Albus' perceptiveness and curiosity was proving to be a challenge against her necessity to conceal the more peculiar details of her identity.

Though the people around her weren't stupid exactly, Albus just wasn't the type to be stirred into another direction, to be gently manipulated to forget some detail or to not ask a question that hit too close to home. He was the only one of the student body that in two months had slowly learnt every detail of the cover story she had to tell the Headmaster and staff, in order to join in as an exchange student.

Yes, her common sense was screaming at her, she should be careful of Albus, even avoid him as much as she could, if she wanted to be sure that nothing that oughtn't would be revealed; not that it was possible for him to have the facts, so no matter his intelligence he would never be able to find out the exact truth on his own, but it might prove an inconvenience to her if he was to suspect that something huge was amiss.

Needs must, of course, but she wasn't feeling very comfortable with the bit of lying and shifting of the truth she had to do, since Albus was very kind to her from the beginning and was proving to be an excellent, invigorating company. Not to mention that he had managed to keep his questions from becoming a questioning, even though Nerya could tell that he was not only interested, being an inquiring mind and all that, but also puzzled by her secretive manner. For his restraint and discretion she was grateful, and a bit amused too when she witnessed his will turn iron in its endeavours to restrain his curiosity.

Indeed, she knew it would be wiser to steer clear of Albus, but the red-headed prefect with his intense, twinkling blue eyes and the somewhat eccentric mannerisms, was one of the most fun and interesting company she had known, even if she included her own people. And like that, every time, much like on the very first evening, her wish overpowered her reason, appeasing it with internal half mumblings about 'I'm here to have fun after all' and 'I'll be careful, nothing will go amiss' and 'I have nothing to lose but everything to gain'.

And like that they kept getting to know each other and Nerya wouldn't have it any other way. Also, there was something else that was easing her conscience; the more time she spent with Albus, more a feeling of safeness grew, like her gut was telling not to worry about him. She couldn't help but think sometimes, that he had something about him that reminded Nerya very much of home, but only in the good ways. Yes, indeed, Albus was the biggest surprise of them all.

A/N: Hope you enjoyed! Any kind of feedback is very appreciated!