Chapter 51: End of Summer

The next few weeks passed slowly for Kirara, who had no choice but to rest and recover from her time in the Soul Society after the rest of the Vizards refused to let her do anything until Hachi gave her the all-clear.

When that day finally came, it was almost the end of summer, and Kirara was losing her mind. She'd practically run off the moment Hachi had said that she was fully healed and would be fine to resume her normal activities.

She was so excited to finally get out and enjoy some of the remaining summer, that she even put on shoes with the intention of meeting some of the girls from her class. The black boots remained unlaced and seemed dangerously loose, but stayed on as she darted around the warehouse, pulling on a long blue flannel shirt over her black cami and shorts.

"Are we that unbearable to be around?" Rose asked, taking a break from playing his guitar as he saw Kirara make her way to the exit. She stopped, and turned with a sweet smile that he knew never to trust at this point.

"Rose, that's not it at all," she told him in the innocent tone that was far from innocent. "You know you're my favourite person," Kirara smiled. Rose rolled his eyes at her flowery words.

"Am I now?" he asked, sounding exasperated.

"Is he now?" Shinji came up behind Kirara, arms going around her to pull her against him. Rose didn't miss the devious flicker in Kirara's face that told him that she was well aware that Shinji was within earshot when she'd said it.

"Do not drag me into your antics," Rose warned, going back to his guitar to continue playing. His newest composition flowed as beautifully as the rest. Kirara laughed, too happy that she was finally allowed out to behave herself.

"There's no antics," Kirara told him seriously. "Sorry, Hirako. You'll have to accept that Rose is my favourite," she said, lifting her head to look at Shinji. There was a loud twang as Rose missed a note, and both looked at him quickly. Rose was flawless with the guitar, and they'd never heard him make a mistake.

"My apologies," Rose said quickly, but it was obvious that he was stifling a laugh. Kirara tilted her head, wondering just what she'd said to make him laugh so much, but when she felt Shinji go rigid, she looked up at him again.

"What's so funny?" she asked, seeing the look on his face. There was something about it that almost seemed flustered, judging by the blush that was barely visible. It was rare to see him look so embarrassed.

"It's nothing," he forced the words out, and let Kirara go. "Go on then, if you're so desperate to get out," Shinji pushed her away lightly, and Kirara looked from him, back over to Rose, who had turned away entirely now to avoid looking at them. "Don't you have friends to see? Pretty sure you haven't so much as touched the homework you've been muttering about," he pointed out, and Kirara stiffened.

"Oh, fine. Keep your secrets," she grumbled, turning on her heel. "I'll see you both later," Kirara waved her hand over her shoulder as she walked away, and the moment she was out of the warehouse, she heard Rose unable to hold in his laughter anymore.

"I'm warning you, Rose. You'll pay if she ever finds out," Kirara barely managed to hear Shinji's quiet warning, which only made Rose's laughter grow.

"Weirdos," Kirara muttered.

Kirara was the last to arrive of the small group of girls gathered. They had planned on getting the last of their summer homework done, while enjoying some of the summer holidays together before classes started back up.

"Kirara!" Orihime gasped, her eyes lighting up as she rushed over and almost knocked her off her feet.

"Easy, Orihime," Kirara laughed, and patted her head. The girl smiled back, and her relief was obvious. She really had worried that she wouldn't see Kirara again after she vanished from the Soul Society without a trace. "You okay?" she asked as Orihime nodded.

"Since when are you two so close?" Chizuru was the one to ask, huffing as they joined the group. Kirara smirked at her obvious jealousy.

"Come on, let's find a place to work," Tatsuki just rolled her eyes, linking arms with Orihime to start walking. Chizuru huffed, but followed as she started chattering to Orihime about coming to visit.

"It's good to see you," Hibiki smiled as Kirara fell into step beside her.

"You too. How's your summer been?" she asked. She'd felt a little guilty that she hadn't been able to spend any time with the shy girl who had become her friend, but Hibiki had told her that she had been busy with a relative who had invited her to stay during the holidays while Hibiki's parents worked.

"It's been…interesting," Hibiki answered, and Kirara tilted her head. The girl seemed less timid than before the holidays. "I've been having a lot of fun though," she smiled brightly, which made Kirara smile.

"Good to hear," she said, glad to see the girl coming out of her shell.

"What about you?" Hibiki looked up at her. Her eyes were sharp, and she didn't miss the slight drop in her smile.

"It's not been as relaxing as I would have hoped," Kirara admitted, and chuckled. "Once we get this homework out of the way though, I'll be fine," she said. Instantly Hibiki's face fell.

"Yeah," she grumbled, and Kirara had to laugh.

"Not started either, huh?" her question made Hibiki feel relieved to know that she wasn't the only one who was slacking on all the work they'd been given over the holidays. She just nodded, and Kirara's laughter grew. "At least there's two of us," she nudged Hibiki, whose own smile returned as they followed the others.

Despite Kirara's excitement and relief to finally be allowed back out now that she was fully healed, it didn't stop the nightmares. She had been able to get out and see those she considered friends and talk with them - including getting an update from Orihime about the time they spent in the Soul Society after Kirara left - yet that night, she still settled into an uneasy sleep.

They had been plaguing her since her return to the World of the Living, and no matter what Kirara did, she still woke up each night sweating and fighting back screams.

This night was no different as Kirara dreamed of Sokyoku Hill, of Sosuke Aizen pinning her to the ground and impaling her with her own sword. Darkness swirled around her periphery as Kirara thrashed on the ground, desperately trying to get the Zanpakuto out of her shoulder so she could stop Aizen from taking the Hogyoku.

"It's so small," Aizen had marvelled as he held the Hogyoku between his thumb and finger. At his feet, Rukia was on her knees stunned from the sensation of having it ripped from inside of her soul. Kirara watched as Aizen smiled that cold, greedy smile, and she screamed, yanking the sword free from her shoulder at last.

Aizen had only watched as she donned her Mask and moved around him at faster speeds, swinging her Zanpakuto with the intent to kill. The moment her blade touched his neck, it shattered, and so did her Mask. "How tragic you are, Kirara. You had such potential, but you allowed those emotional ties to weaken you," he spoke, and then his hand was around her throat. "He will watch you die, bleeding out in his arms, before I finally end the meagre existence he claims is a life," Aizen promised in that cruel, gentle voice.

Tears streaked down Kirara's face as she struggled to breathe, thrashing in his grasp. She wouldn't let him. She would kill him before he ever harmed anyone she cared about. She refused to be weak and helpless again.

Then a gentle touch on her cheek finally registered in her mind, and Kirara stopped thrashing.

"Kirara, wake up," the voice was careful and quiet, and finally Kirara opened her eyes.

Horror seeped into Kirara's body as she found herself straddling Shinji's chest, her hands around his throat. He'd reached up, his expression guarded as he gently wiped the tears on her face away. In a beat, Kirara had released him and thrown herself across the bed, gasping for breath.

"I'm sorry…" she breathed. She'd had every intention to flee the room as she leapt away, when Shinji practically tackled her and wrestled her struggling form back to the bed.

"Stop," his voice, still quiet, caused Kirara to stop struggling. Something about it caused her fight or flight response to die down, and instantly she burst into tears, clinging to him. "You're okay," Shinji told her, not letting up on his tight hold on her.

"I almost…I'm-" he shushed her when she tried to apologise. Kirara's tears rolled down her face as she choked on her sobs.

"I told you, you're only allowed to apologise when you're being annoying," Shinji chided her gently.

"But I-"

"You're alright. Remember what I told you?" he said, and Kirara frowned, lifting her head. The tears hadn't stopped, but her sobs slowed to quiet hiccups. "You're not alone," Shinji said, reminding her of a time long ago. Kirara hiccuped again, but she didn't argue with him. Instead she reached in and kissed his neck where her hands had been wrapped. She felt his shiver at the soft touch, and managed a small smile.

"You know…" she started, and trailed off as she wasn't sure she should say. Shinji hummed to show he was listening as his hand idly traced circles down her back. "That night was when I first realised how I felt," Kirara admitted. Instantly his hand stilled.

"Huh," she rolled her eyes at the response. "I didn't know I was so charming," Shinji's comment startled a laugh from Kirara.

"You think you're charming," she said, not looking up as her face burned from her confession.

"I'm plenty charming," Shinji argued, moving to kiss her before she could try and stop him. "I got you, didn't I?" he grinned, enjoying the blush that was covering her face. He wiped away the lingering tears, determined to calm her down.

"You got me despite all that," Kirara muttered, her brow furrowed in that stubborn look she seemed to save just for him. For a long time, it annoyed him and only succeeded in making him fight with her. Now he enjoyed seeing it, because it meant his teasing was working. He kissed her again, keeping it brief. He could see how exhausted she was.

As they sank down amongst the pillows again, Shinji kept Kirara close and refused to let her go even as she wriggled to get comfortable. "I was useless trying to stop Aizen," she whispered, admitting the nightmares that plagued her.

"You'd have regretted it more if you hadn't gone," Shinji pointed out, and Kirara found she had no counter to that. "Either way, Aizen would have gotten the Hogyoku. At least since you were there, you know enough that we're prepared for whatever he has planned," he said. Kirara took a moment before she gave a huff.

"I hate your logic," she complained, and he grinned, pressing a kiss to her forehead. "But thanks," Kirara whispered. Shinji didn't reply, listening as her breathing evened out and she drifted off to sleep.

"Idiot…you're far from useless," he whispered as he pulled her closer still and let his own eyes close.

The last of the summer holidays flew by much faster, and before long there were only a couple of days before school was due to start again. Even Kirara managed to finish the homework, to the amusement of the rest of the Vizards who tormented her for being so studious.

However, there was still one thing she needed to do, and she had spent that time debating just how to approach the subject of Hollowfication with Ichigo.

As luck would have it, he showed up to one of their class meetups to enjoy the last of the holidays. He was his usual self, mostly talking with Chad and Orihime, all while grumbling when Kirara would tease him.

"So what's the badge about?" she asked, not having missed the strange badge with a skull decorated on it that hung from his belt.

"What, this?" Ichigo lifted it so it sat in the palm of his hand. "Captain Ukitake said it's a Combat Pass, a sign of a Substitute Shinigami," he said, and found Kirara looking blank in response. "What?" he frowned, and she shrugged.

"Never heard of either a Combat Pass, or a Substitute Shinigami," Kirara admitted, her eyes still on the strange pass he held. She had no reason to doubt Captain Ukitake, knowing that he was not one for duplicity, but something about it seemed strange.

'Why would they have something like that ready for Ichigo to use? It feels like there's more to this. I've never even heard of a Substitute before,' Kirara thought as she studied it. She could sense the power lingering in the Pass, making her more and more curious.

Knowing that she wasn't there to chat about the mysteries of the Soul Society, Kirara dismissed the thoughts for now. "Well…I suppose you are a unique case, Ichigo," she brought a smirk to her face as she lifted her gaze to his. Ichigo rolled his eyes.

"You're as annoying as ever," he complained, and Kirara's smirk widened.

"Aw, Ichigo. Were you worried about me?" she teased, and his scowl deepened into a glare.

"Dream on," he snapped. His defensive behaviour only made Kirara laugh, and he huffed. "The old man wasn't too happy that you ditched when you did," Ichigo suddenly said, watching as Kirara's laughter faded. For a moment, she turned serious, and he saw glimpses of the woman he'd seen in the Soul Society. Right now, he wasn't sure which was the real version.

"He wanted answers I can't give yet. There are things I need to do first," she said softly, turning her gaze over to where Orihime was chattering eagerly with Tatsuki. Judging by the look on her best friend's face, it was food-related. Kirara almost smiled at that.

"Like hanging out with us?" Ichigo muttered.

"Would you believe me if I said yes?" Kirara's response surprised the young man, who fell silent as she turned back to him. That serious look was still on her face. "Ichigo, we need to talk," she warned him carefully. Ichigo's brow furrowed.

"What about?" his own question was filled with wariness. Kirara smiled grimly in response.

"I think you know," she said softly. "Ichigo, I saw the Mask you had on you after your fight with Renji," her words made Ichigo stiffen. She saw the flicker of fear before he could hide it, but Kirara didn't stop what she was saying. "I also felt it when you fought Kenpachi and Byakuya. You've got a-"

"It's nothing," Ichigo cut her off so sharply that Kirara was surprised enough to stop talking. "I've got it handled, you don't have to worry about me," he said firmly. Kirara resisted scoffing at his attempt to reassure her.

"No, you really don't," Kirara told him honestly, not missing the defensive look on his face. He didn't want to talk about it. "It's going to keep eating at you until eventually it overthrows you and takes control for good. You need to-"

"Kirara," his voice was quiet, but firm. "I appreciate all your help. You've looked out for me a lot, both before this stuff with the Soul Society and during it. But this is something I need to do myself," Ichigo told her, meeting her gaze with that stubborn, determined look that usually would convince Kirara that he was right.

Kirara believed in Ichigo for most things. She knew he could stand up to Renji. To Kenpachi; to Byakuya. But this was something that he couldn't face alone, no matter how strong he got.

Ichigo glanced over to where their friends were chatting, and Orihime called them over with a wave. Ichigo raised a hand in response, smiling faintly. "You haven't told them, have you?" he asked Kirara quietly.

"No, I'm not an idiot," she huffed, a little offended that he would think so. "But Ichigo-"

"I've got this. You don't have to worry about me. But thanks, Kirara," he stopped her, refusing to listen to her words. Kirara's fists clenched at her sides as he walked away to join the others, refusing to listen to what she had to say.

"You damned idiot, Kurosaki," she growled under her breath. She was frustrated with him, but she knew at that moment that no matter how she approached it, he wouldn't listen to her.

"I appreciate all your help. You've looked out for me a lot, both before this stuff with the Soul Society and during it," Ichigo's words had told Kirara that he saw her as a friend in their own bizarre way. And she'd seen how he was with his friends - he was almost as bad as her with keeping secrets, trying to handle everything himself. He'd never fully rely on her, even with something she knew as intimately as Hollowfication.

Kirara cursed under her breath, running a hand down her face. There was only one thing she could do now.

She had to ask for help.

To say that Kirara threw a tantrum when she returned to the Vizards' base was an understatement. She volunteered to spar against Kensei - already a warning sign - and took it seriously as the two fought until he caught her with a punch that threw her into some rocks and caused them to shatter.

"Okay…now I feel better," Kirara admitted as she emerged from the rubble. Blood dripped from a cut across her cheek, but she ignored it as Kensei rolled his eyes and stood straight. He wasn't entirely uninjured; he could feel his ribs smarting from a kick he hadn't managed to dodge.

"Why am I always your target when you're in a mood?" he complained, and Kirara turned to the silver-haired Vizard with a pretty smile.

"Because you don't hold back, and I enjoy sparring against you," she said sweetly. Kensei just glared at her.

"Do you want to tell us what's gotten you so worked up then?" Kensei asked. Kirara tilted her head, not losing the smile, and Kensei felt his temper rising along with the temptation to continue sparring against her.

"Careful, Kensei. You sound concerned," she teased, and was rewarded by an angry growl.

"Brat," his response made her giggle, but it faded quickly. Kirara sighed.

"I couldn't get Ichigo to listen," she told him, but kept her voice loud enough for the others to hear. Kensei grunted.

"You couldn't convince him?" Rose was a little surprised by this. "I assumed that after everything that happened in the Soul Society, he would trust you by now," he said. Kirara turned to him, and shrugged.

"That's exactly the problem. Because he knows me, he won't rely on me for this," she explained, which made the blond frown in confusion. "Ichigo doesn't want to worry his friends about what's happening to him," Kirara elaborated, and realisation dawned on him.

"Sounds like someone else we know," Lisa muttered. Kirara shot her an irritated look.

"So now what? We should just leave the idiot if he doesn't want help," Hiyori shrugged dismissively as she sat nearby.

"No way," Kirara refused instantly.

"I have to agree. We can't exactly leave him to let his Inner Hollow take over," Love spoke up. "Whether we like it or not, this kid is like us, and if we let the idiot run loose then it's going to make all of us look like walking time-bombs," he warned, and they all had to agree.

"So what do we do?" Mashiro asked, sitting on a rock nearby and swinging her legs idly.

"Someone else is going to have to get him to come to us," Shinji said simply, and they all turned to him. Kirara pinched the bridge of her nose.

"You want someone else to go to that school and recruit him?" Rose looked a little wary at the idea.

"Baldy's right," Hiyori agreed. "Someone has to get in there and persuade him, before he causes trouble for all of us," her agreement made them all nod slowly.

"The question is…who the hell is going to do it?" Kensei asked, looking around at them all. Instantly an awkward silence descended on the group.

"I'll do it," Lisa volunteered, and everyone turned to her with a wary look. "What? I'd be a perfect fit!" she exclaimed, offended by their reactions.

"You'd traumatise the kid," Kensei told her honestly. Lisa scowled at him, but Kirara had to agree. She'd heard from Yoruichi just how prudish Ichigo was around her, and Lisa wasn't much better than her.

"Unfortunately, I believe we've already sent the best suited in," Rose considered as he looked at Kirara. With her personality and slight frame, it was easy for her to disguise herself as a teenager. "Most of us wouldn't fit in," he allowed, knowing that the rest of their group were strange at best.

"It was never going to be easy," Shinji hummed, coming up behind Kirara to wrap his arms around her waist and rest his chin on her head. She stood there, arms folded as she tried to determine who would be best to approach Ichigo.

"Rose is right. I don't think any…" Kirara trailed off suddenly, and hummed. "Well…there's one of us that might work," she considered, and the others turned. One by one, it dawned on them too, and Shinji yawned before realising that they weren't looking at Kirara, but him.

"Oh no…" he muttered, realising too. "No way!" Shinji refused as he let go of Kirara.

"While I think your personality would be more of a deterrent to Ichigo…" Kirara started, and earned an offended glare from the man as she turned to face him. "You're probably going to be the best choice. Everyone else either lacks the temperament or appearance," she said bluntly.

"She's right," Lisa agreed, but her smirk told him that it served more to amuse the others than anything else.

"I'm not suited for something like this," Shinji refused, shaking his head.

"All in favour?" Hiyori called, a smirk on her own face. Everyone raised their hands, and Shinji made a mental note to make them all regret it later. "Looks like you're going to school!" she cackled.

If there's one thing I apparently enjoy doing, it's giving Kirara trauma. And there's plenty more to go!

Hope you liked it!

Please review!