epilogue

Did Syaoran Li Quit the Music Industry for a Podcast Star?

Only two months ago, Syaoran Li thrilled fans by putting on a guerrilla concert in Shibuya and playing a two-hour set of his greatest hits and fan-favorite B-sides. And then, at the very end of the show, he made an announcement that left fans reeling and sent the music industry into a tailspin.

"This is my last performance for the foreseeable future," Li said into the microphone, after thanking fans for sticking by his side throughout what one might call a roller coaster of a career. He left details vague, but he did note that he'd been unhappy while performing in recent months.

But even that isn't the most surprising part of this story. Just before he walked offstage, Li spoke directly to the camera, addressing an unknown individual who was presumably watching somewhere: "If this gets to you, and you still feel how you felt before, you know how to find me. And I'll wait for you."

The internet, of course, has been on fire with speculation. Fans could agree on this much: surely, the intended recipient of his message was the one who made him happy, and being away from that person due to his career drove him to quit. Deducing the identity of this individual, however, has turned out to be much more difficult.

Early theories pointed to everyone in Li's well-documented love life, most notably actress Mizuki Akizawa, whom he dated for nearly two years. But Akizawa's representative has categorically denied any such claims, and the story doesn't seem to align. Li has seemingly fallen off the face of the earth since the announcement, and Akizawa has been posting photos from her latest movie set in New Zealand—alone, with co-stars, with friends, but never with even a hint of Li's presence.

One theory that never made it very far was that the mystery individual is Sakura Kinomoto, a paparazzo with whom Li developed a relationship (fans and media alike have guessed romantic, but his camp has consistently called her "a friend") last year. But Li has barely mentioned her in months, and Kinomoto, who doesn't seem to have any social media accounts, is nowhere to be found.

Or is she?

In the last year, a particular dating podcast has taken Japan by storm. Amusingly named "Where the F !k is He?!," the show is co-hosted by two individuals who have chosen to keep their true identities anonymous. On the show, the two discuss the trials and tribulations of trying to find love in modern-day Japan. The show has become especially popular for the eccentric and oftentimes hilarious commentary from one of the hosts, "Mio," whose endearingly wacky perspective has led some fans to believe that she dated someone famous in the past.

After much speculation and demand for more details, Mio gave listeners a tell-all in one of the podcast's most recent episodes, divulging intimate details of her former relationships but never naming names or locations. She did, however, confirm that she had been seeing someone of import—at least, important enough to warrant security, secret getaway trips, and fleeing from paparazzi. In the end, she said, she broke up with her mystery beau, who was about to sacrifice his career for her privacy, for his own good. But she ended the episode on a hopeful note: she still loved him, and she thought they could be happy together.

It sounds far-fetched, but is it possible that the enigmatic and popular Mio is, in fact, Sakura Kinomoto, and her ex-lover is Syaoran Li? After all, per the exposés about her that came out around the time Li's relationship with her was revealed, the then-paparazzo had been aiming for a journalism career. And despite Li's denials of anything beyond friendship, photos of the two together show that they became awfully cozy for just friends.

We may never know, or we may find out as soon as tomorrow-Li, after all, has made a career out of being unpredictable. But if we had to make a bet on it, Li's message to his mystery person and Mio's shout-out to her ex-lover sound very much like two sides of the same conversation...

"Well, I think they found you out."

Syaoran laughed, dropping his tablet on the bed after swiping out of the article. "No kidding."

"You don't sound bothered," Meiling remarked from the other end of the line.

"We've been expecting someone to put it together. And besides," Syaoran said, adjusting his phone and looking out beyond the glass doors of the villa to the sunlit deck, where Sakura met his eyes from the pool and beckoned him toward her with a smile on her face, "it's kind of hard to let anything bother us here."

After Sakura had shown up at his place that night, the two of them had been inseparable, much to Syaoran's delight; but he'd quickly realized how difficult it'd be to move freely around Tokyo together without attracting press. And so, after a month or so of waffling, Syaoran, suddenly (blissfully) free of any obligations, had finally decided to book a getaway to Fiji for a few days. It had been so refreshing to make these plans without having to get clearance from Matsura or even Meiling that he wondered why he hadn't semi-retired sooner.

Meiling laughed. "I figured. Don't rub it in too much."

"Sorry."

"Don't be," Meiling said. "It's nice to hear you so happy. But we do need to talk about how to handle this."

Syaoran sighed, sitting down on the edge of the bed. "I suspected you'd say that. What's the damage?"

"I mean, it helps tremendously to know that you and Sakura were anticipating this and aren't hurting over it. I know your movie promotion is coming up, but it's an ensemble cast with a lot of stars, and the small level of scandal that this could cause wouldn't hurt the movie's performance, in my opinion. The worst that can happen now is that your public goodwill takes a hit."

Syaoran rolled his eyes, letting out a small huff of exasperation. "Of course."

"But that doesn't mean that's guaranteed, you know?" Meiling went on. "You have a very loyal fan base. It's only the hostile ones that harassed Sakura so much last year who would have issues with it. And do you care about keeping those fans, anyway?"

"No," Syaoran said immediately. "Not at all."

"Then, I think the answer is that you don't address it."

Syaoran raised his eyebrows. "What?"

"I mean it. Just don't address it. No press conference, no statement on social media, nothing."

It sounded too good to be true. "What's the catch?"

"Nothing," Meiling said, and the matter-of-fact tone of her voice made Syaoran realize she was serious. "You can afford for there to be some flames when you aren't trying to sell a product all by yourself. And anyway, flames need oxygen to keep burning, right? So just let it die out."

"If this means isolating Sakura from the rest of the world again, we can't—"

"Don't be absurd. I would never ask Sakura to do that again."

Syaoran was satisfied with the conviction in Meiling's voice, but that still didn't answer the ultimate question: "So, then, what do you suggest we do?"

"I mean, don't gallivant all around town and shout it from the rooftops or anything. Use your discretion. Don't put yourself in dangerous situations."

Syaoran frowned, annoyed. "Of course I wouldn't. You know I wouldn't—"

"Come on, now. I wasn't finished," Meiling chided. "I was trying to say, don't be an idiot-but live your life. If you wanna go out together, go out together. Bring her with you when you go to the studio, if you'd like. Take her to dinner. Go shopping together. Travel together. Whatever makes you guys happy."

Syaoran looked back outside. Sakura was crouched at the edge of the patio now, carefully examining a tropical flower, dripping pool water all over the deck. She looked so at ease, so unlike when they'd been together before.

"That sounds like a dream," he murmured. "I can't even imagine that life."

Meiling sighed. "After all you two have been through, I'd say you deserve it."

"Thanks, Meiling," Syaoran said, smiling. "It'll take some getting used to."

After Syaoran hung up the phone, he walked outside to join Sakura, who was now floating on her back in the pool.

"How's Meiling?" Sakura asked, turning over and swimming up to him.

"Same as ever. Working too hard." Syaoran sat along the edge of the pool deck and plunged his legs into the water. He smiled down at her. "Having fun? I didn't know you were such a fish."

Sakura giggled and nodded. "This has been lovely. If the ocean weren't right there, I would probably live in this pool."

Syaoran grinned and reached a hand out to her. "Sorry to tell you I've got other plans for us. C'mon, let's get ready for dinner."

Syaoran watched as Sakura stared out the window at the waves. Even after two months of being back together, he found himself marveling at the fact that anytime he wanted, he could look up and see Sakura right there in front of him.

Sakura turned her head to meet his eyes and smiled. She reached her hand out to his across the table. "What're you thinking about?"

"I was going to ask you the same thing," Syaoran said. "Are you having a good time?"

Sakura rolled her eyes. "I'm having a terrible time. Couldn't you tell by the way I keep telling you I never want to leave here?"

Syaoran grinned. "I mean, if you wanted, I could arrange for us to stay forever."

Sakura squinted at him. "I want to say you're exaggerating, but I also feel like you're not. So for the record, we can't do that, and we need to go home at some point, or Meiling and my brother will come and hunt us down."

Syaoran threw his head back and laughed. "Oh, I don't know. We could definitely go into hiding. The number of people we've fooled with those wigs is pretty impressive, wouldn't you say?"

Sakura giggled. "That's true. We've definitely conned way more people than I'd ever have thought possible." Her face grew serious. "But really... What are you thinking? About when we get back."

"Well, promotion for the movie begins about a month after we return, so I'll be doing interviews for that, going to premieres, traveling a bit..." Syaoran rubbed his thumb over Sakura's hand. "I've been meaning to ask you, but truthfully, I've been holding off because I'm afraid of the answer. I was wondering if you'd want to do some of that with me, if your schedule allows it."

Sakura's eyes widened.

"Travel with me, I mean," Syaoran said hurriedly. "You don't have to do any red carpet appearances or anything like that. Not unless you want to."

"Oh, Syaoran," Sakura said softly, smiling at him, "Whatever you need me for—I'll be there for you. Okay?"

Syaoran could only stare back, dazed. Not for the first time, he was awestruck by his good fortune. Sometimes, it could be overwhelming.

Sakura cocked her head to the side, frowning. "Are you okay?"

When he'd jumped back into this with Sakura, he'd told himself he would take his time. They had all the time in the world, after all. What was the rush?

But something about her goodness made him feel like every day that he didn't show her the full measure of his love was a day wasted.

"Syaoran…?" Sakura was leaning across the table now, emerald eyes soft and glowing and full of concern.

"Marry me," Syaoran almost blurted out. He swallowed and took a moment to school himself. "Move back in with me."

Sakura's eyes widened, and her response was not at all what he expected: "My God. She's a genius."

Syaoran frowned. "Excuse me?"

Sakura giggled. "Sorry! I mean—Tomoyo! She's a genius. She completely called this. She said she would bet me her entire wardrobe that you were going to ask me to move back in with you on this trip."

"And?" Syaoran pursed his lips. "What'd you say?"

"I said it felt like it would be way too early to expect you to do that—"

Syaoran's heart stuttered in his chest as he tried to fight the immediate and all-consuming sense of disappointment. Of course. They needed to take it slow, after all that had happened—

"But, if you did, that I'd say yes, of course!"

Syaoran's eyebrows shot up. "Really?"

Sakura nodded, her smile lighting up her whole face. "I spend half the week with you anyway, and I love Tomoyo… But when I'm back at her place, I just... I miss you."

Syaoran felt like his heart might burst. He leaned his chin into his hand, trying to suppress the stupid grin spreading across his face. "Well, then... I guess you can tell Tomoyo her wardrobe is safe."

"Syaoran! Syaoran, over here!"

Syaoran navigated his way through the throng of press scattered along the red carpet, trying to remember to smile. Six months had passed since his guerrilla concert, and an even longer time had gone by since his last red carpet appearance. As he came up to the final reporter along his path, he clenched and unclenched a fist at his side. So far, he'd managed to evade any real questions about his love life and namely Sakura, who was waiting for him just inside the theater, likely already seated beside Meiling and Eriol. Thankfully, the reporter was one he recognized from prior red carpets and had generally been friendly to him both in person and in the press.

"Syaoran, how are you doing this evening? You look wonderful!" The reporter held her mic toward him, beaming at him.

Syaoran smiled, feeling the tension ease from his shoulders a bit. "I'm well, thank you. I appreciate it."

"Seriously, you look the most rested you've appeared in some time. I'm assuming your hiatus is treating you well?"

"It is."

"You've all but disappeared from the media during that time and you have no social media, either—people have really missed you! What have you been up to?"

"Oh, you know," Syaoran said lightly. "Traveling a bit, spending time with loved ones, focusing on my health."

Please don't ask about Sakura, he thought.

Syaoran and Meiling had, of course, discussed how to proceed if he were asked about Sakura by any of the press and had agreed that feigning ignorance was the best approach. But executing that plan live with persistent reporters, he knew, was more difficult than it sounded. It wasn't even that he was bothered by the thought of telling the world they were together—it was anticipating the follow-up questions that would surely open her life up to public judgment and chaos once again.

"Good! The time off has really done you wonders. Now, tell us a little about how it was being back on set for the first time in years!"

Syaoran felt the rush of relief run through his body in a palpable way, and he smiled genuinely for the first time that evening.

"Gladly. Being on set felt like coming home…"

For Syaoran Li, the closing of one door has always coincided with the opening of another, and what's more, those doors have always opened and closed by his own design. Exiting an illustrious film career in his youth paved the way for him to ultimately dedicate himself to an even more illustrious musical career. And now that he's moved on from music, his next chapter is a little less organized, but probably the most important one yet: some acting, a lot of producing, and much more personal happiness.

"I haven't quit anything for good," Li says, his tone flippant as he wipes at the ring his coffee cup has left on the table between us. "I guess you could say I just view everything as being on hold until I'm ready to go back."

"Everything," as readers may guess, mostly means his music. Although Li was undoubtedly a bona fide movie star in his youth, his musical career catapulted him into a level of megastardom that came at the expense of his personal well-being. Last year, he famously made a public announcement at an impromptu concert that he would be stepping back from music indefinitely, although it didn't mean he was out of the spotlight for good. Just six months after that, he returned to movies with the hit film The Western Bridge.

When I ask if he doesn't feel nervous that the same audience won't be waiting for him when he's ready, he shakes his head.

"It's inevitable that with a certain amount of time away, some people will forget about you or move on from you. But I'm thankfully at a place in life where, instead of focusing on those people, I'm just grateful for the ones who are still there and the new fans who've decided to give me a shot."

It's a levelheaded approach, befitting for someone who's seen high highs and low lows throughout the entirety of his career, to be sure. Li had a stellar final year before his hiatus—his album, aptly titled "Coming of Age," shot to number one and spawned a string of hit singles, earning the entertainer an unprecedented number of records and accolades.

But before that, he'd seen everything nearly slip through his fingers. Months of relentless bad press surrounding Li and his fraught relationship with starlet Mizuki Akizawa, as well as rumors of him dating a paparazzo, led fans to turn on him and nearly caused his record label to sever ties with him. So how did he manage such a miraculous comeback?

Outside of the period where he very publicly dated Akizawa, the notoriously private star has rarely divulged much about his personal life. So I'm surprised when he tells me he's going to answer the question, but that he's nervous.

"That was a rough time," Li says, pondering his next words carefully. "But I had a lot of support. My family rallied around me and my manager and Eriol [Hiiragizawa, with whom Li has maintained a close friendship since childhood] put up with way more bullshit from me than they should have. And . . . I guess you could say I was motivated more than ever to see if that kind of success was what I really wanted."

Was it, I ask?

"To a degree," Li responds, clearly hesitant to say more.

But I wouldn't be doing my job properly if I don't press a little—and when I do, Li divulges a satisfying morsel of insight into his private life.

"I'm with someone whom I love very much. We tried being together for a while before the release of Coming of Age, and to be honest with you, it was too much for me to handle."

By Li's account, his partner was willing to deal with a massive invasion of privacy and freedom for Li—likely a necessity to be with someone with such a big profile—but Li was the one who couldn't stomach it. He'd ended up wanting to retire from the limelight before 'Coming of Age' came out so they could have a more private life together.

"But she didn't want me to give up my career for her," Li says. "So, we parted ways for a while."

After his break-up with said person, Li reached new heights in his career, but it left him feeling, by his own description, bereft of anything substantial in his life, and he felt the need to pull his exposure back—strictly on his terms—and reunite with what (or who) made him happy.

Li understandably refuses to reveal the identity of the romantic partner to which he's referring, but all signs point to Sakura Kinomoto, a former paparazzo-turned-journalist whom Li met through the business. For a while, Kinomoto produced and hosted the massively popular dating podcast, Where the F !k is He?!, ultimately revealing her own story of love and heartbreak, which many online speculate to be about Li, through the podcast's most successful episode to date. And although Li doesn't talk about Kinomoto specifically, the two have been seen together in public numerous times now, looking low-key at dinners together around the city and with Kinomoto even attending the premiere of The Western Bridge.

So, now that he's no longer onstage or making promotional rounds every other week for most of the year, has the change led to a transformation in his personal life, as he'd hoped?

"Absolutely. Taking a step back and focusing on my personal life was the best thing I could do. There was a lot of pressure there to give up all of myself to the public, and it took nearly losing everything that mattered to me to understand how much that pressure was affecting me," Li says. Then, he adds sincerely, "But I do miss my fans."

I interviewed Li about two months before Coming of Age debuted, and I reported then that he seemed ready to return to the spotlight, albeit a bit distracted, as if he were constantly checking behind him to make sure some calamity wasn't occurring in the background. It all makes sense now, of course. And this time, I can say with certainty that he seems like a man transformed—more mature and weathered, in many ways, but also more relaxed, confident, and truly happier.

It's a good look, I tell him. He should really wear it to every shoot.

Li laughs. "If things keep going the way they are now, I think that shouldn't be too difficult."

Sakura tightened her grip around the strap of her bag as she made her way off the elevator and onto the floor of her new office. She was well-aware of the public speculation about her identity as the podcaster behind Where the F !k is He?!, and not to mention as Syaoran Li's beau—and while neither of those items had come up in her interview for this position, she couldn't help but feel nervous that at least one of her new colleagues would recognize her and ostracize her. But her interviewers at Jikan magazine had been so professional and friendly, she reasoned—surely, they had no idea, or if they did, they had decided to keep their conjectures to themselves.

Syaoran had been like a doting parent as he'd sent her off that morning, trying to ease her nerves and reassuring her that she'd be okay. "If they recognize you, so what?" he'd said, a soft grin on his face. "Tell them they're right, you are who you are, and that you got the job fair and square."

Sakura swallowed hard and took in a deep breath before pulling open the doors to Jikan and walking up to the receptionist—a young woman with short, wavy brown hair and sweet, almost childlike features.

"Hi," Sakura said nervously, trying to smile. "I–I'm Sakura Kinomoto. Today's my first day here, and I think I'm supposed to meet with Mr. Terada?"

Much to Sakura's relief, the young woman smiled back at her. "Of course, Miss Kinomoto. Nice to meet you. You can follow me."

As Sakura followed the receptionist through a maze of halls, she saw the framed, blown-up photos of some of Jikan's most iconic covers hanging along the walls, and it occurred to her that this job was the very job she'd dreamed about since her years in journalism school. She abruptly remembered her first day at Glimmer. Yamazaki's office had been so different from this place, and yet she'd felt so at home after their initial meeting that she couldn't imagine a different beginning to her career now. She felt a rush of gratitude for him and made a mental note to contact him and Chiharu later to thank them again.

After a few more turns through the floor past large, sunlit bull-pen style rooms of cubicles with employees chattering and typing away, Sakura followed the receptionist to a heavy-looking wooden door with a brass handle.

"He's right through here. He's expecting you," the receptionist said warmly. "Let me know if you need anything."

"Thank you," Sakura said, smiling at her—genuinely this time—before knocking on the door.

"Come on in!"

Sakura opened the door and stepped into a warm, bright room with wood floors and bright white walls lined from floor to ceiling with books, neatly arranged knicknacks of all kinds, and records. It would have been overwhelming if everything weren't so tidy. A tall, handsome man with chocolatey brown hair a shade warmer than Syaoran's and kind, dark-brown eyes, perhaps about ten or fifteen years older than her, stood to greet her.

"Welcome, Miss Kinomoto," he said with a smile. "Yoshiyuki Terada."

Sakura bowed, trying to swallow her nerves. "M-Mr. Terada, it's a pleasure to meet you—thank you so much for the opportunity to be here!"

Mr. Terada shook his head. "The pleasure is all ours. Your writing samples were some of the best I've seen in a long time. I can't believe you were able to put some of those together while you were working a day job," he said, referencing the freelance pieces Sakura had written during her previous job.

Sakura blushed. That felt like a lifetime ago, but it was incredibly flattering nonetheless. "Oh, it—that was nothing, really."

"Well, my sincere hope is you're able to bring more of that 'nothing' to the table here at Jikan. I am sure no one mentioned this to you during the interview process, but I am also quite aware of the rumors surrounding the possibility that you ran a popular podcast about dating for the past year?"

Sakura's eyes widened, and she felt her heart start working into overdrive almost immediately. She took a deep breath and tried to remember Syaoran's sweet words of assurance to her this morning. You are who you are.

"Um—yes. Yeah. Those rumors are true," Sakura said with a little smile, although she had to actively stop herself from wringing her hands.

Much to her relief, Mr. Terada smiled broadly. "I'm glad to hear it, because when I heard the rumors, I listened to a couple of episodes."

Sakura felt herself blushing to the tips of her ears. Although she'd borne her personal life to the world quite freely, she'd done so with the shield of anonymity at the time. To think her boss had heard all of it made her feel mortified.

"What you exhibited in those podcast episodes is something I think is sorely missing in the journalism industry these days, which is an almost innate understanding of the human condition. The sense of empathy you demonstrated was really remarkable to me. And I picked up some of that in your writing samples, too, although it's a bit subtler in text, of course."

All Sakura could do was nod—this all seemed good, but she was trying to get her mind around the fact that her boss knew about her podcast, her love life, and so much more.

"So it goes without saying I'd like you to really work on pulling that part of yourself out even more in your writing assignments. But Jikan could use a fresh new face on its podcast team as well. And if you're up for it, I'd love for you to write some content for some of our human interest podcasts. Over time, that could even lead to a hosting position if you're interested."

Sakura felt her jaw drop a little. "E-excuse me?"

"Only if you're interested," Mr. Terada repeated, raising his hands. He'd clearly mistaken her surprise for distress. "I know that's all a bit overwhelming for the first day of work, sorry."

Sakura shook her head vehemently. "No, I was just—this is so unexpected, and I—I'm thrilled, I don't even know what to say!"

"Well, you don't need to answer today. Just think about it, and—"

"Yes!"

This time, it was Mr. Terada's turn to look surprised. "Yes?"

Sakura laughed and nodded. "Yes. I'd love to help with the podcasts."

Mr. Terada grinned. "Decisive! I like it. Welcome to Jikan, Miss Kinomoto."

"Syaoran, where are we going?"

"You'll see, Sakura. Just a little bit farther."

Sakura trailed behind Syaoran, letting him lead her by the hand down a street with which she was totally unfamiliar.

"You're lucky I trust you, or this would seem awfully creepy."

Syaoran chuckled. "Sorry. I know how this must look, but I think you'll be pleased when you figure out where we're headed."

Syaoran had been acting fidgety all day, so Sakura realized she should've anticipated something like this. But when he'd abruptly told her that they were going out for dinner and that she should get dressed, she'd expected a casual date at a favorite haunt, not whatever this was.

"Well, am I dressed okay for this? I don't even know what it is . . . "

Sakura self-consciously brushed a strand of hair back behind her ear and glanced down at her outfit, a simple off-the-shoulder black linen dress with puff sleeves that hugged her waist and ended at her calves. She'd secured her hair back with a claw clip and wore around her neck the gift that Syaoran had given her just a few days after she'd landed her new job—a small diamond pendant shaped like an ornate key on a thin gold string. She'd opted for more sensible black block-heel sandals since they'd be walking. In the fall weather, she was a little chilly, but when Syaoran had told her they'd be inside most of the time and the walk would be short, she'd decided to forgo a jacket.

Syaoran paused and looked back at her, and his smile was so tender then that she almost felt the need to avert her gaze. He looked so happy and beautiful these days, Sakura thought. It never failed to take her breath away.

"You look gorgeous," he said, stepping up to her and raising his free hand to brush a strand of hair away from her cheek.

Sakura blushed. "Well, thank you, but that doesn't answer the question."

Syaoran laughed. "Yes, you look fine for the occasion. Don't worry."

They reached the end of the alley, and Syaoran knocked three times on a door Sakura hadn't even realized was there. The door opened, and much to Sakura's surprise, Eriol's head poked out, a cacophony of music and crowd noise pouring out from behind him.

"The star of the show is here!" Eriol exclaimed, opening the door wider to let Sakura and Syaoran through.

Sakura stepped into a dimly lit hallway behind Syaoran, the music and crowd noise growing louder, and she stared at Eriol in confusion as she gave him a hug.

"What are you doing here? I thought you and Tomoyo were on vacation in England!" Sakura shouted over the din.

"We had to make an early return–had a bit of an emergency," Eriol said with a grin.

"Well, that doesn't sound very good," Sakura murmured with a frown. So why did Eriol look so happy?

"Don't worry. All's well. And here comes Tomoyo!" Eriol said, gesturing down the hallway, which appeared to open into a room filled with people.

"Sakura!" Tomoyo squealed, running toward Sakura with her arms outstretched.

"Tomoyo! It's been weeks," Sakura exclaimed, squeezing Tomoyo into a hug.

Tomoyo squeezed Sakura back. "I know! I'm so happy to see you!"

"Me, too," Sakura laughed. She stepped back and realized her friend was practically vibrating with excitement, and she raised a brow. "What's going on? You look… You look a lot like you do when you want me to try on a new gown you've made."

Tomoyo laughed, although it sounded a bit higher than normal. "Don't be silly. I'm just happy to be back. I missed you guys! Plus, I love England, but it is so dreary there this time of year."

Sakura tilted her head before shrugging. "That's true. I feel like the sun only came out once when Syaoran and I were there a couple of years ago."

"Well, let's head in," Tomoyo said, making eye contact with Syaoran for a brief moment before guiding Sakura away by the shoulders.

"I'm still so confused—Syaoran hasn't told me anything about where we were going! Is this a new restaurant he wanted to try or something?"

"Hmm… you'll see," Tomoyo responded with a mischievous smile.

Sakura felt her palms sweating as she followed Tomoyo down the hall. She couldn't tell whether her nerves were from anxiety or excitement; she didn't like the air of mystery about all of this, but everyone else seemed so happy that she couldn't fathom how whatever she was walking into could be a bad thing.

She nearly jumped when she felt a hand on the small of her back.

"You okay?" Syaoran asked, pressing a kiss to her temple.

Sakura looked up at him—he looked happy, too. Radiant, really. She smiled and nodded.

Syaoran led her down the hall and, much to her surprise, past the large room full of people. Sakura barely had a moment to glance at it, but it looked like a party was going on—the room had been beautifully lit and decorated, and a band had been playing in the corner while waiters walked around passing out glasses of champagne and hors d'oeuvres.

"Didn't Tomoyo and Eriol go in there?" Sakura asked Syaoran as she followed him farther down the hall.

"They did. We'll join them soon," Syaoran said airily.

He continued to lead them into an elevator bank, up a few floors on the elevator, and then further up a stairwell. This reminded her quite a lot of that day so long ago at Hiiragizawa Tower, but she couldn't understand why he'd pulled them away from their friends so abruptly.

"Syaoran… What is this?" Sakura asked nervously, even as she continued to follow him up the metal staircase. "You know I'm terrible with surprises."

Syaoran stopped his ascent and turned back to look at her, raising one eyebrow. "Can you ever remember a time where I surprised you with something bad?"

Sakura laughed. "Maybe when you told me you were going to quit music for me."

Syaoran let out a loud laugh. "Okay, that's fair. I promise this isn't anything like that." He held out a hand. "Just come on. Trust me."

Sakura bit her lip and then took his hand. "Okay."

Syaoran led them the rest of the way up the steps, where they ended at a door. He pushed open the door, letting Sakura step out first onto the roof of the building. She gasped under her breath at the sight.

It wasn't her first time doing this with Syaoran, but as always, the evening cityscape of Tokyo from such a high vantage point was stunning. Syaoran had chosen the perfect point of the evening to bring her up here, just as the sun was beginning its descent over the horizon, the last of its rays casting its rubescent glow over the buildings and streets beneath it.

"Are you cold?" Syaoran asked from behind her. "Here."

Sakura felt his jacket being draped over her shoulders, and she realized she had goosebumps, but she wasn't so sure if it was from the cold.

"Syaoran…" She turned around to face him. "It's stunning, but I know something's up. Why'd you bring me here?"

"Well, I thought it'd be appropriate." Syaoran glanced out at the sky, and then back at her again. The corners of his lips tilted up. "I think I fell in love with you on a rooftop watching the sunset, you know."

Sakura wracked her brain, trying to figure out the time to which he was referring. The only time they'd ever gone to a roof to see the sunset was so early on in their relationship—the very night she'd thought of a few moments earlier, in fact…

"At Hiiragizawa Tower?" Sakura whispered. "But that was so long ago. We hardly knew each other."

Syaoran shook his head. "It doesn't matter. Somewhere inside of me, I think I just knew then."

Sakura blushed, wondering how he could just say things like that so easily.

He stepped a little closer to her, that soft smile on his lips. "We kissed for the first time on a rooftop, too."

Sakura's blush grew even deeper. "Syaoran, I… Wait. You said it was appropriate for us to be up here—for what?"

In one smooth movement, Syaoran lowered himself to one knee and reached into his pocket to pull out a small black leather box, no larger than the size of his palm. "To ask you to marry me."

Sakura's eyes widened as Syaoran opened the box to reveal a round cut diamond sitting atop a gold band, glinting brilliantly in the twilight. Heart pounding, she raised her gaze to meet Syaoran's eyes. She couldn't process the sweetness in his expression—he looked so earnest and so gentle, and maybe, if Sakura squinted, a little bit nervous, that it made her heart ache.

"Syaoran, I…" Sakura held a hand up to her mouth. She had no idea what to say. Yes just didn't seem like it would be enough to convey what she felt.

"I know it's only been a little while since we got back together, but I just—I know," Syaoran breathed. "I know that for me, there isn't anyone else."

Sakura felt her eyes welling up with tears. She couldn't believe he was trying to convince her—as if he had to do something so preposterous—

"I want to spend the rest of my life with you," Syaoran continued. "I know we're young, and forever probably sounds like a long time, but I don't think I could live a life without you in it, Sakura. So—"

"Syaoran, yes," Sakura said with a sob, throwing herself into his chest and wrapping her arms around his neck. "Yes, of course I'll marry you."

Syaoran nearly stumbled backward before catching her with a laugh. He pulled back, an elated smile on his lips, looking so handsome that Sakura could hardly stand it. He leaned in and pressed a kiss to her mouth.

"So, then," Syaoran murmured, "I guess I can finally do this."

He lifted up Sakura's left hand and slid the ring onto her finger. It fit perfectly. Sakura admired it in wonder, turning her hand ever so slightly so the diamond would catch the light.

"Do you like it?" Syaoran asked softly.

"Of course I do," Sakura said with a low laugh. "It's perfect. How did you even know my size? Or what to get me?"

Syaoran shrugged. "You have some very sneaky friends who were willing to help me out. And it helps that you slept through the times I tried to secretly measure your ring finger."

Sakura giggled. "No way, did you really?"

"You know how persistent I am when I want something," Syaoran said with a grin.

"I do. But I'm glad you were." Sakura beamed up at him. "I really, really love you."

Syaoran's eyes glowed as he stared down at her, brushing a few of her tears away with his thumbs. "I love you more, Sakura."

As the sun began to set, Syaoran leaned in to press a long, sweet kiss to her lips. Sakura felt herself shiver. It was almost too perfect. She tried to commit this moment to memory, every detail of it—the way the faint, familiar scent of his cologne smelled, the feel of his fingertips grazing against her cheeks as he continued to peck kisses along her temple after they'd parted, the way the glowing red of the waning sun seemed to set Syaoran's eyes ablaze. And the moments before—

"Wait," Sakura said, eyes widening. "Is everyone down there in the building—is that for us?"

Syaoran nodded, grinning. He checked his watch. "I think your father and brother should be arriving any minute now, too. Everyone's waiting for you, Sakura."

Sakura laughed and shook her head, trying to ignore the new tears that were springing to her eyes. "How—this must have taken you weeks to coordinate. How did I not notice?"

Syaoran chuckled. "I can be sneaky when I want to. It also helps that you are remarkably unobservant."

Sakura laughed harder and lightly whacked his arm. "I can't believe you. That you'd do all this for me…"

"Why not?" Syaoran whispered, kissing her hair. "I wanted this to be special for you. You deserve the world, Sakura."

Sakura stared up at him, wondering how she'd ever gotten this lucky. The pain they'd gone through to get here had been so acute that at some points, she'd felt that she might never recover—and yet, now that she was on the other side, with Syaoran standing beside her, her heart felt fuller than ever.

He led her back down the stairs and back down the elevator, and when it dinged open, she could hear the immediate din of the crowd again—the crowd that was there for them.

"You ready?" Syaoran asked beside her, grinning down at her, looking so beautiful it made her chest ache.

Sakura took his hand and beamed at him, trying to savor the incredible warmth and joy and love in her chest. "I think with you, Syaoran, I'm ready for anything."

-the end-

that's it! the end the end, the epilogue that for some reason took me four years to write! really, what i came to realize is that i fare much better writing consistently when there's a healthy dose of angst to balance out all the fluff, and this was just a chapter of everyone being (deservedly) happy, haha. our babies are so happy and in love and they're going to get married!

i have no clue if any readers are still around checking for this, but if you are—thank you for everything. all the time and love and words you gave me made up such a big part of my youth, my growth, and my adulthood. my life, really. i have no clue if i'll return to fanfic as real life obligations only continue to grow—i suspect i will—but no matter what, this place and this fic and all of you will always mean the world to me.

till next time, take care of yourselves!