Here's chapter 17 - hope you enjoy!

Jade knew something was up before even a word was spoken. There was a reason she missed as many family dinners as she could, and it was exhibiting itself as she slowly slunk into the dining room. Her siblings, including her older brother Zach, back from college at the most inconvenient of times, were perched at the table, alongside her mom and stepdad. There was something poignant, she thought, about the fact that they were all there already, with her being last to the table. She had, after all, always felt like an outsider, even in her own family.

Five pairs of eyes looked up as she walked in. They should've been surprised, really. It had been a long time since Jade had eaten in her own home without Beck by her side for more than a couple days per week, yet here she was sneaking onto the table alone for the third day in a row. She met her mother's eyes as she silently lowered herself into the empty place, and saw that they lacked the surprise that she had expected. That was sign number one.

Sign number two manifested itself in the fact that, once sat down, she couldn't shake the sense that she was being watched. Looking up to confirm this, she could see that four pairs of eyes remained on her, the only exception being her eight-year-old brother who seemed to find his cutlery much more interesting. Beside him, however, her older brother's expression cast a sharp contrast; there was more than a trace of a smirk on his face as he looked at his younger sister. Sign number three.

"Jade, what a nice surprise." Her mother smiled, with an awkwardly palpable lack of conviction. Jade merely glanced at the woman in response. "Is Beck not joining us?"

Jade almost flinched at the name. No, he was probably getting dinner with Alyssa Vaughn. She shook her head. "No."

"Ah, that's a shame. We haven't seen him in a few days."

Jade didn't take the bait. No comment. She remained silent.

"Is everything alright between you two?"

And there it was. Sign number four - a big, unavoidable neon number which gave away that her mom had been clued in on something. And of course she had to bring it up in front of the entire family - that was just her style. Jade theorised that this was her way of getting back at her youngest daughter for making her a grandmother at 42; she never had been too thrilled at Toby's existence, although at least she hadn't kicked Jade out.

Jade chewed her nails, silently imploring the waiting eyes to fuck off and mind their own business. Her family were only ever interested in her life when it was going wrong.

"Only I had a call from Sanah earlier and she seems to think that you two have broken up."

If there hadn't been four witnesses to the theoretical crime, Jade thought she might've throttled her mom in that moment. Instead, she stared at her knuckles as if they were the most interesting thing in the world, watching them turn white as she squeezed her hands instead of her mother's neck.

"Leave her mom, she's probably still in stage two of the grieving process." Zach smirked. "You know what that is, Jade? Denial."

His tone dropped with satisfaction, which Jade could only attribute to the fact that the addition of Toby to the family had meant that she had taken his room whilst he was off at college, meaning that he was now forced to share with his eight year-old brother when back in town.

"Well, Jade, is it true?" Katherine asked, completely ignoring her son's snotty remark.

"Yes." Jade replied through gritted teeth, and she could almost feel the amusement of the table grow. Because they were seeing what they'd all predicted happen - a collective 'I told you so' and glances across the table at the expense of her relationship. Because obviously it hadn't worked out; they were 16 with a child - everyone saw it coming. Except her of course. She had been naive enough to believe that the one good thing she had might stay good. Idiot.

Her mother's sigh was excessive to say the least; a broadcast to the entire table of her disappointment.

"Jade, you need to think about this. I thought you were going to try to argue less with Beck and calm down, for Toby's sake." The older woman complained. Jade didn't respond, instead going for her first mouthful of whatever radioactive-looking dish her mother had plated up for her - reason two why she tended to skip these occasions. It was some kind of pasta dish, not that one could tell this by sight, but it tasted bitter. Irony was a wonderful thing.

"It's not her fault, mom. She can't force Beck to love her." Amber chimed in, forming something of an anti-Jade tag team with her brother.

"I broke up with him." Jade snapped, involuntarily breaking her vow of silence.

"Oh Jade, now why would you do that?" Her mother cried. "That boy is the best you're going to get, especially with a child. And think of Toby, for God's sake, he should have a loving home and a stable family."

"Ohh, okay mom." Jade sneered. "Just remind me, how many baby fathers do you have?"

That shut her up.

"How dare you talk to your mother like that!"

Aaaand the other dragon was awake.

"She allows you to live in this house rent-free and pays for your son to go to daycare so you can spend your days frolicking around pretending to be a teapot, and that's how you choose to speak to her? You decided to get pregnant so you will deal with the consequences, you ungrateful little girl!"

See, in response to this, most people would expect Jade to storm out, if not scream at her so-called 'stepdad' and kick over his chair. But not many people understood Jade, and even fewer knew her family dynamic. The thing was, Jade West wasn't stupid, far from in fact. And she wasn't mean as a rule, just when it was necessary and possible for her to get away with, apart from the few times she was unable to control herself, which admittedly had been increasing in frequency with the recent arrival of Tori Vega on the scene. So, as much as she wanted to yell at David, and slap that piggy little face of his, what she wanted more was for her son to have a roof over his head and a mother who had an education that could support him. Which meant acting against every single impulse in her body and letting David's words go unanswered.

Across the table, Zach let out a barely stifled laugh, and Jade's frustration grew. Having to restrain herself was bad enough, without other people being acutely aware of this fact.

"I liked Beck." Jade's little brother, Luke, pitched in between chews. "Does this mean he won't be Toby's dad any more?"

"No, he's still his dad." Jade replied, irritably.

"But you broke up."

"So?"

"But- well-"

"Beck will still be Toby's dad even if he and Jade don't get back together." Katherine explained. "And Jade will try especially hard to make sure he sees Toby lots, won't you Jade?"

Jade merely rolled her eyes.

"But you broke up with Jade's dad and now he's not her dad any more."

This was a moment in which the silence should've been palpable. Cutlery should've clattered onto plates and faces should've blanched white. Instead, however, the space was punctuated by a loud laugh from Zach, clearly amused by his younger brother's naivety.

"That's not true, darling. Jade's dad is still her dad." Katherine said, awkwardly.

No he's not.

"But Jade never goes to live with him."

"That's because Jade lives here."

"But so do Zach and Amber and they go to live with their dad sometimes. Will Toby go to live with Beck or will he have a new dad who lives here?"

"Well Lukey, that depends on who Jade decides to baby trap next." Zach smirked, before Katherine could respond, shooting a look at Jade across the table, as though daring her to argue.

"Zach!" Katherine gasped, and Jade was almost taken aback by her mother standing up for her for once. "Don't say those kind of things in front of your brother." Ah, that made more sense - let's protect the little one's ears but not the older one's heart.

At this point, the radioactive pasta really wasn't worth the earache of a conversation Jade was having to experience in return. She suddenly didn't feel so hungry.

"Yeah, I'm not hungry so... give it to the dog or something." Jade said flippantly, rising from her place.

"Sit down, Jade, I'm not finished." Katherine ordered, and Jade groaned dramatically as she sunk back down. "I need to know what your plan is now. I don't want to be paying Toby's daycare fees if you're planning to bail on your education to run off with some boy."

Luke and Amber snickered in tandem. Jade shot them a glare, not that that fazed them.

"And why would I do that? God, mom, I just broke up with Beck and I spend every second of the little free time I have taking care of his kid. When would I have had the time to meet someone else?" Jade complained.

"I don't know Jade, because I really don't know why you would break up with him in the first place. Care to enlighten me?"

None of your fucking business.

Her mother sighed after a pause. "See, if you're not going to tell me, then I'm going to assume the worst."

Of course the worst would be her fault.

"I told you they should've got married." David said matter-of-factly, his words obscured by his full mouth. He made Jade grimace in disgust.

"Like that would've solved everything." She muttered.

"Well you wouldn't be in this predicament would you?" He yelled in response. "You'd think you want to be a single mother the way you act."

Jade just ignored him. It was clear he would rather her wallow in a loveless marriage than 'cast shame' on the family by raising Toby herself. She probably valued Luke's opinion over his father's on the matter, and he was eight years old.

"I'm fine on my own."

Zach snorted. "Yeah, remind us how much rent you pay. You're so independent, Jade."

"Fuck off, Zach."

Jade kept her head down as a bomb exploded around her. Zach shouldn't have played with fire but it was Luke that Katherine and David were worried about getting burnt.

"Jade!"

"What is wrong with you?"

"There is a child at this table!"

To be honest, Jade couldn't really care less. She was sure Luke had heard worse on the TV shows David watched and failed to police. And if her mother was happy for him to hear the whole family berate her then why should a little curse word be any worse?

"Do you want to get kicked out Jade? Is this what this is?" Katherine snapped, almost shaking with rage. Jade continued to look down, wordlessly. "Because you are so goddamn lucky to be able to live here after what you've done. Do you know how many people have told me that if they were your mother, you'd be on the first train out of here? I've even had people giving me leaflets to convents, so don't for one second think that it's okay for you to speak to anyone in this family like that because you are on the last of many, many chances."

Jade felt so lucky to have such a loving, understanding mother.

"I am going to ask you once more why you broke up with Beck and you are going to tell me if you want to keep a roof over your head!"

"I just did, okay?" Jade snapped. "I didn't cheat on him, I'm not about to run off with anybody else, I just... I wasn't happy, okay? That's it."

Okay, so that wasn't the full truth, but her mother had far from earned the right to hear that from her.

Katherine paused for a moment. "Did he cheat on you?"

Jade sunk back into her chair in frustration. She wasn't sure if this conversation was ever going to end.

"He cheated on you? Right, I'm getting Sanah on the phone right now to sort this out." Katherine said hastily, flapping her arms around as she spoke.

"What's his address? I might have to pay him a visit." Zach piped up, strangely without even a hint of humour. That was one thing about him that Jade had always found weird - he seemed to take joy from her misery 90% of the time, yet was also nearly as protective of her as he was of Amber. Beck had been given the full 'older brother speech' when he'd started dating Jade and had even been shoved up against a wall when Zach had found out about the pregnancy, albeit largely because David had decided to fabricate a story that Beck wasn't stepping up to support her. Beck was just thankful that Jade had been there to explain, or Hollywood Arts' resident pretty boy might not have been so pretty any more.

"Oh my god, no, he didn't cheat on me. We just broke up." Jade groaned. The truth was, even despite what she'd said to Beck, deep down she knew he hadn't cheated on her. And even if she had her doubts, anyway, she would never let her family know. The last thing she needed was another barrage of 'I told you so's.

Katherine steadied herself at the table, her lips a curt line across her face. She was a good-looking woman, most people would agree, but looked older than she was, probably aged by having four children and a life full of drama, Jade guessed. The frown found an oddly natural place on her face, as though it suited her more than a smile.

"Well, I hope you know what you're doing, then, because we've given you just about as much as we can and I don't know what more we can do for you, Jade. You decided to have that baby so now you're going to have to make some better choices to make sure he doesn't suffer as a result. You can't afford to be selfish anymore, Jade."

Jade wished Katherine had taken her own advice.

"Yeah thanks, I'll really bear that in mind." Jade replied as she stood up, putting little effort into disguising her sarcasm.

Her mom huffed in response and David shook his head.

"Where are you going now?" He asked, furrowing his brow.

"To feed my son."

"But you've barely eaten any of your dinner." Said Katherine. "I didn't spend my time and effort on that for it to go to waste."

"Like I said, I'm not hungry. Feed it to the dog or whatever."

"How are you supposed to feed your son if you won't even feed yourself?" Her mother asked, exasperated.

Jade shrugged. "I'm sure I'll find a way." And with that, she escaped the room and its thick, judgmental cloud. She could almost feel the oxygen returning to her lungs as the door closed and the sound of silence settled upon her.

She knew they were still talking about her, of course. She didn't even need to hear the words to be sure of that - just the voices was confirmation enough. Knowing this, she did her best not to listen; it wouldn't be anything she wanted to her. But as she slipped back upstairs to the one person she felt like she truly still had, she couldn't help but catch the remnant of a sentence.

"...if I had someplace to send her I would."

She almost laughed; this might've been the first time in forever that she'd actually agreed with her mom. Sure, if there was anywhere for her to go, she'd happily be off. But the truth was that she had nowhere, and nobody but the four month-old who wouldn't even remember her were she to disappear.

And the old Jade would've been fine with that, truly. Because she didn't need anyone else; that was a sentiment for pathetic people like Vega. But she couldn't deny that that wasn't good enough for Toby. So, she might not have anywhere to go in life, but she certainly had one place in her mind to go right now.

As if pulling her out of her reverie, Toby grumbled from her room.

Oh, right - baby.

So maybe not right now, but tomorrow. She had a mission.