Author's Note: It's finally here! Only a year late. Haha! I really thought it would be ready sooner, but I recently moved and I seriously underestimated how much time it was going to take us to get settled. Fingers crossed the next chapter comes quicker! This one isn't terribly exciting. Just a plot twist and a few seeds planted for the future.
Enjoy :)
August 28, 1995
Ex-Undersecretary to the Minister Dolores Umbridge Released from Azkaban, Claims False Imprisonment
By Rita Skeeter
The Ministry of Magic has seemingly become the Madhouse of Magic as another scandal comes to the surface. Today, the former Undersecretary to Minister Cornelius Fudge, Dolores Umbridge, has been released from Azkaban prison due to lack of evidence. Umbridge's solicitor claims the faithful undersecretary was falsely accused of conspiring to have The Boy Who Lived Again, Harry Potter, delivered to He Who Must Not Be Named during the final task of the Triwizard Tournament.
Ludovic Bagman, the famed quidditch star, was originally arrested for the crime. However, following a tip from known criminal Peter Pettigrew, then-DMLE director Amelia Bones arrested Umbridge and released Bagman. Bagman has since disappeared from the public eye.
As readers are aware, Madam Bones is now the interim Minister of Magic and is planning to seek election to the position this fall. It is rumored that her choice was influenced by her current love interest, ex-convict Sirius Black, who was reportedly very close to Pettigrew during their time at Hogwarts. As reported previously, Bones is hoping to secure an endorsement from Black and his godson, Harry Potter. One must wonder if perhaps the entire story of the Dark Lord's defeat was fabricated in order to win Madam Bones political points.
The Prophet will continue to monitor this situation and update readers as more of these troubling facts emerge.
Amelia slammed the Prophet down and cursed so much it surprised even her foul-mouthed boyfriend. "This is a nightmare." She looked apprehensively at Sirius. "We need to talk about Harry's safety."
The part of Sirius's heart that was not currently tied in a knot swelled with affection for his girlfriend. Her entire career was on the verge of complete destruction, and her first thought was about his son.
Before he could respond, a second owl appeared and dropped a letter off with Amelia. She opened it and read, her jaw dropping as she took in the words. Her shoulders slumped and she found herself fighting tears as she answered her friends' silent inquisitions. "And now I'm under investigation at work."
Sirius walked over to comfort her. His primary concern was Harry's safety, but he found his heart hurting for Amelia as well.
The door opened abruptly as Harry and Andromeda entered. One look at his son's worried face told Sirius that he wasn't going to have to explain much.
"I take it you saw the Prophet."
Harry nodded. "Are you going to be ok, Amelia?"
Amelia smiled sadly at him. "Don't worry about me, kid. I'll be fine." She looked at Sirius to see if he wanted to explain more.
Harry didn't give him the chance. "I don't understand. Why would they release her now?"
Sirius and Remus looked at one another before they looked back at the teenager. Remus cleared his throat softly. "Because Peter Pettigrew was the key witness against her, and Peter died today."
Harry's jaw dropped open. He was completely unsure of how to respond. Peter was the reason his parents were dead, yet he was potentially the reason he was alive. It didn't feel right to celebrate his death, but it didn't feel right to mourn it either. He looked at Sirius, but his father's face didn't offer him much clarity.
"I…I don't know what to say."
Sirius shook his head as he pulled his son into a hug. "Neither do we, really. But, since Peter was the only witness against Umbridge, there's no evidence to keep her in prison."
"But…but she sold me to Voldemort!" Harry protested, looking up at his father.
"We know that, Harry," Amelia told him, "Or at least we think we do. But she hadn't been convicted yet. Now the only evidence is the word of a dead man, and he was a criminal himself. It'll be extremely hard to hold that against her in court."
"So, there's really no other evidence against her? Nothing?" Tonks asked incredulously.
Amelia thought for a moment before she slowly shook her head. "Not that I can think of. To be honest, I wouldn't have investigated further if I hadn't been so convinced by Bagman's terror that night. I was certain he was telling the truth when he said he wasn't involved. It was easy to believe when Peter told me it was her. She is such a vile woman."
"So there's a chance she really is innocent?" Remus questioned skeptically.
Amelia shook her head and put her hands over her face. "I would bet my entire career that she's guilty, but I don't really have any proof." She dropped her head and let out a low groan before composing herself. "Ok, let's look at this logically. It had to be either her or Bagman. They were the only ones with access to the winnings."
"Or anyone in Bagman's office," Tonks reminded her.
"Or anyone in Umbridge's," Sirius added with a sigh.
"But why would Peter accuse Umbridge? Why pick her randomly? My understanding is he didn't even know her before he got roped into all of this. And if he was going to falsely accuse someone, isn't Bagman the more likely suspect? I mean he was accused of being a death eater before," Amelia reasoned.
Sirius cursed as he rubbed his temples.
"So," Harry began cautiously. He could feel his heartbeat quickening and his palms starting to sweat. The person who likely sold him to Voldemort was out of prison. Whatever felt safety he had achieved over the summer after the graveyard was now crumbling beneath him. "What does this mean? Will I go back to having security follow me everywhere?"
Amelia and Sirius looked at each other for a long moment, trying to have a silent conversation. Eventually Sirius sighed and looked at Harry. "Honestly, I don't know, Son. That's something Amelia and I are going to have to discuss."
Harry felt his knees buckle at this and had to steady himself on the back of their couch. He wanted Sirius to tell him it would be ok, that he would be safe. The thought of facing yet another year of danger or unknowns made his chest feel tight. Recognizing immediately that he was on the verge of another panic attack, all he wanted to do was flee. He looked cautiously at his father. "Could I go to my room please?" While it seemed to his father that the teenager was in need of a good sulk over the possibility of his freedom being restricted again this year, Harry was in reality in a panic, the graveyard scene replaying in his head.
Sirius nodded sadly. "Sure, Son."
…
Inside his room, Harry did his best to regulate his breathing, but it was only getting harder and harder. It seemed like this cycle of being in danger was never going to end. He faced Voldemort as a first and second year. He had a death eater after him his third year. Last year the Triwizard Tournament ended in him coming face to face with Voldemort and ultimately dying and yet living. When he first got his letter from Hogwarts, learned he was a wizard, and left the Dursleys house, it felt like such an escape. He was living a life he'd always dreamed about. Then Sirius came into his life and things got even better, as good as he could have ever hoped. But the lingering danger never left. It was always there, and to him it felt like it would never end.
Harry kicked his trunk, then cursed to himself as his toes throbbed from the blow. He wanted to scream, but couldn't get his lungs to actually work beyond rasping. Before he knew it, he was fully hyperventilating.
…
The adults just stood quietly for a long while, each of them contemplating what the future looked like. Finally Amelia sighed. "Well, one small consolation. Regardless of whether she's in prison or not, Umbridge doesn't have any reason to be at Hogwarts, and since she hasn't been to trial yet, she'll be closely monitored. Plus, I doubt she has many allies now that most of Voldemort's followers are locked up."
"I don't like the way you said most and not all," Sirius said, groaning and rubbing his forehead. The fact that they had no one left to follow was little comfort to anyone in the room.
"Yeah," Amelia agreed, defeat written all over her features. "I guess we know what the next step is."
Tonks nodded. "We need to have an Order meeting."
"Damn, I'm getting tired of hearing that phrase," Remus commented bitterly.
Sirius was surprised by his friend's tone, but he just nodded in hearty agreement and was about to speak when Dobby popped into the room, frantically gesturing and grabbing his ears.
"Master Sirius must come quick! Harry Potter needs him. Harry Potter is," and he made a wheezing sound in his throat.
No one took the time to decipher what the elf meant. They all sprinted towards Harry's room. Sirius threw open the door and was beside his son in seconds. "Harry! Are you ok?"
Harry tried to open his mouth to respond, but his lungs wouldn't provide the air he needed to form the words. "Dad," he rasped. He shook his hands to try to get some feeling in them again.
Remus was immediately beside the father and son. He and Sirius tentatively took Harry's arms and helped him sit down on his bed. Sirius crouched in front of him. "Harry, look at me son." When Harry met his eyes, he calmly gave instructions. "Try to take a deep breath."
Harry shook his head. He couldn't control his breath enough to breathe deeply. "Can't."
"Yes, you can," Sirius said firmly but kindly. "Look around and tell me five things you see."
Harry's eyes desperately scanned his environment. "Desk…boxes…" he said hoarsely. He managed to catch his breath a bit before adding slowly, "My trunk…trainers…and my books."
"Good," Sirius told him. Remus rubbed the boy's back while Sirius continued, "Now, tell me some things you can hear."
Harry's breathing had slowed significantly, but it was still labored. He looked around. "The ticking on the clock," he said, gesturing towards the clock on the wall. "And…" he looked towards the open window, "some birds outside."
Sirius nodded. "Smell anything?"
Harry looked down at his hands, slightly dirty from the cauldron he'd been cleaning with Andromeda. "The soap on my hands."
Sirius smiled at him. "Try that breath again."
Harry took a deep breath and held it a few seconds, like Healer Williams had instructed him before. Then he let it out. As he began to recover, he noticed someone in front of him, handing him a glass of water. Realizing it was Tonks, horror overtook him at the realization that he had just had a panic attack in front of not only Sirius and Remus, but also Tonks, Amelia, and Andromeda as well. He was sure he had never been so mortified.
Sirius looked at him worriedly. "Are you ok?"
Harry nodded. "Yeah, I guess." He wished everyone would just leave his room…or that the floor would open up and swallow him whole.
Sirius seemed to read Harry's thoughts as he looked around at the room, giving Amelia a particularly meaningful look, which she understood quickly.
"Why don't Dora, Andromeda and I go talk to Albus. We'll let you all know when the Order meeting is."
…
Harry lay on his bed, blankets wrapped tightly around him, staring at nothing in particular. He was sure he was never going to leave his room again. He had never been more embarrassed in his entire life. It wouldn't have been so bad if it was just Remus who witnessed his panic attack, he was extremely close to the man and was sure Sirius had told him about them anyway, but to have the others as well was downright disastrous.
Sirius had left him a few minutes after the others to give him time for a proper sulk, but it was getting close to dinner time and he really didn't feel like Harry should be alone.
Harry looked up as he heard his father knock gently on his door. Without waiting on Harry's response, Sirius opened the door slightly and peeked in. "Hey kid, feel like talking?"
Harry curled up a little tighter. "Not really."
Sirius frowned and walked over to his son's bed. He squeezed himself on to the edge, and Harry shifted over to give him some more room but didn't sit up.
"Well, unfortunately I'm afraid we need to."
Harry said nothing.
Sirius looked down at him and continued. "There's going to be an Order meeting tomorrow. You are welcome to participate or not. It's up to you."
Harry's frown deepened. "I don't think I'm going to be much help to the Order if a simple newspaper article gives me a panic attack."
Sirius chose not to respond to that, realizing that there probably weren't many words that would be particularly helpful. He leaned closer and rubbed Harry's back for a few minutes silently before beginning again. "Remus's lessons with you will help, I'm sure."
Harry shrugged.
Sirius sat up again. "In fact, he'd like to get started with one after dinner this evening. Is that ok with you?"
Harry considered offering another shrug, but thought better of it. "Ok."
Sirius nodded. "Alright. Why don't you make sure your trunk is ready and your things are packed for the Weasleys while I make dinner. Molly said you could go home with them after the meeting."
That got Harry's attention. His face pinched in confusion, he looked at his father. "Why am I going to the Weasleys?"
Sirius shrugged. "You asked to go."
Harry sat up. "When did I ask to go to the Weasleys?"
Now Sirius was confused. "When I took the job at Hogwarts. It was one of the first things you asked. You wanted to go with them so you could ride the train, since you didn't ride it last year."
Now that he was thinking about it, Harry remembered that he had wanted to ride the train, but now all he could think about was the possibility of having a panic attack in front of his friends. He shook his head. "I think I'll just stay here until the term starts."
Sirius was downright baffled now. "What? After the fit you pitched last year over not being allowed to ride the train?"
Harry looked affronted. "I did not pitch a fit."
Sirius tilted his head and raised an eyebrow. "You absolutely pitched a fit."
"No, I didn't…"
"Regardless," Sirius interrupted, "Why don't you want to go this year?"
"I just don't want to," Harry responded, looking away as he lay back down. "It's just a train ride," he added, trying to convince himself more than his father.
"Well," Sirius began cautiously, "I'm afraid you don't actually have much of a choice. You're a prefect, Harry, and you have certain responsibilities on the train this year."
Harry squirmed a bit but didn't respond immediately. The truth was he really wanted to go to the Burrow, and he really wanted to ride the train. What he didn't want was to come back to school. For some reason, every time he thought of being at Hogwarts, his stomach did flips and he just felt off. He wanted Sirius to pack their things back up and take them all back to their home, where he felt safe. It did not help that his panic attacks and nightmares were getting worse and not better, and the idea of having either in front of his friends was terrifying.
"What do I have to do?" Harry finally asked.
Sirius shrugged. "That's probably a question for Remus. He knows more about prefect duties than I do. I just know you are required to patrol some on the train."
Harry let out a long sigh. "Well, can't you take me to the station that morning?"
SIrius's heart ached for his son. He was pretty sure he knew exactly why Harry didn't want to go see his friends. "Does this have anything to do with your panic attacks?"
Harry gave no answer.
Sirius tapped his shoulder. "Sit up for a second please."
Reluctantly, Harry pushed himself to a sitting position and looked at his father.
"I know this sucks, Harry. Trust me, I'm every bit as angry and as scared as you are."
Harry tried to turn his head away, but Sirius gently held his chin. "But we've been through worse together, and we'll get through this too." He dropped his hand and looked in his son's eyes, silently begging his son to understand.
Harry looked away. "Can't we just go home? Get away from all of this?" he pleaded, barely above a whisper.
Sirius frowned. "We…could. Trust me, I've certainly considered it."
Harry's eyes grew wide at that before his father continued.
"But Harry, you'd be miserable. Your friends would all be at school. Remus would be here too. You wouldn't have quidditch lesson because Brankovitch has to start the season soon, and you wouldn't be playing on a team either. We'd be stuck at home all the time. You don't really want that, do you?"
Harry looked at him. "But it's not just this stuff with Umbridge, Dad. Do you know how embarrassing it would be to have what happened today happen in front of my friends…or Merlin, what about Malfoy?"
Sirius sighed. "We'll do our best to prevent them. Remus is going to start your private lessons tonight. Those should help. I can ask Andromeda about some calming draughts too. It may be possible for you to take mild ones daily until we get them under control."
Harry looked at him skeptically. "Really?"
Sirius nodded. "She said so before she left. She's going to talk to Ted about it, make sure they get the dosage correct for someone your age and size. It's a start."
"So, I'd have to take a potion every day?"
Sirius nearly rolled his eyes. "Yes Son, you would, or risk more panic attacks. But only for a little while."
"What about the nightmares? Can I take Dreamless Sleep too?"
Sirius grimaced. "I don't know if that is a good idea. You haven't had any nightmares in a few days anyway, and I think you'll be exhausted enough from quidditch and classes to rest easily. But you can try some muggle sleep remedies if you'd like."
Harry expected as much when he asked. "Ok."
Sirius raised an eyebrow. "So, you want to go to the Burrow tomorrow?"
"You really want me to go? You're not scared for my safety?"
"I'm always scared for your safety," Sirius admitted, "But I also trust Molly and Arthur. They'd protect you like their own children. Of course, I'll give my patented safety lecture you can probably say by heart by now," he added, hoping it would make Harry smile.
It didn't, signaling to his father that Harry was doing worse than he thought.
"Harry," Sirius tried again, placing his hands gently on each side of his son's face to hold his attention. "Voldemort is dead. He can't hurt you anymore."
Tears welled in Harry's eyes, and he pulled away quickly to wipe them away. Sirius understood and let his son have a moment. Finally Harry looked back at him and asked. "Can I think about it a little?"
Sirius nodded, suspecting that was the best answer he could get given the circumstances. "Of course, now get out of bed. I'm about to make some dinner, and then Remus wants to have a lesson with you." He slid off his son's bed and reached out to help him up. But before he could walk out of the room, Harry caught his attention again.
"Dad?"
Sirius turned and looked at him.
"Is Amelia ok?"
Sirius let out a long breath. "She's handling it better than most would, I think, and I don't know much about this Umbridge woman, but I know Amelia is a hell of a witch. I wouldn't want to be on her bad side."
That did cause a small smirk on Harry's face. "Me neither."
…
Sirius was stirring a creamy sauce when Harry emerged from his room.
"I packed for the Burrow," his son told him sheepishly.
Sirius smiled. "I'm glad."
Harry seemed to be feeling slightly better. Maybe it was the upcoming lesson with Remus giving him some confidence. Maybe it was the prospect of calming draughts to help him through his anxiety. Or maybe it was simply the fact that no one could stay in a perpetually bad mood around Sirius Black.
"Is dinner ready?"
"Not quite, but soon," Sirius told him, checking some chicken in the oven.
"Can I go visit Hagrid while it's finishing?" Harry asked, glancing out the window and noticing the half-giant's hut.
"No, you may not," Sirius replied, not looking up from the meal preparation.
Harry had already started walking toward the door, not being very accustomed to hearing that particular "no" word from his father. "Why not?"
Sirius stifled a chuckle at his son's outrage as he looked at him. "You know, I seem to remember telling a boy that looked just like you earlier that he was on restriction the rest of the day."
He raised an eyebrow at his son, and Harry's shoulders slumped. Sirius ignored him and continued.
"And besides that, there's also the fact that Hagrid is not here."
"What?" Harry exclaimed. "He's not here?"
Sirius shook his head. "No, he's not."
"Well…where is he?"
SIrius shrugged. "I don't know. Albus just said he asked to take a leave of absence."
"Then…who is going to be our Care of Magical Creatures professor?"
Sirius began pulling plates down and silently signaled for his son to set the table. "Professor Grubbly-Plank, I believe."
"But, but she's horrible!" Harry said stubbornly, knowing it wasn't true. He was just too upset for his friend to be supportive of another teacher.
Sirius looked at him skeptically. "No, she's not. And I'm sure Hagrid will be back in no time."
….
"Locomotor mortis!"
Remus easily dodged his godson's spell and chuckled. "You're going to have to do better than that, Harry. Rictumsempra!"
Harry produced a perfect shield charm that blocked the spell, no need to even move his feet. "Nice try old man," Harry retorted haughtily, a goofy grin across his face.
"Old man?" Remus repeated, pretending to be deeply offended. "I'll show you old, young man." Wordlessly, he pointed his wand towards the bookshelf to Harry's left. Five books flew from the top shelf straight towards Harry. The boy was forced to drop his shield in order to dodge the assault. He noticed Remus moving towards his side of the room, determined to retrieve the flag Harry was charged with defending. "Depulso," Harry shouted as he pointed his wands towards the books, each of them disappearing. Turning his attention back towards his godfather, he shouted, "Accio flag!"
Remus's fingers were inches from retrieving his prize, but he turned in amusement towards his godson. "Nice one, Harry."
Harry was no longer paying attention though, instead he was sprinting towards the flag Remus should have been defending. Almost lazily, Remus turned his wand towards the boy, "Stupefy."
Harry felt his body go rigid and without his consent white hot rage coursed through his body, just like it had the last time someone had stupefied him. Then it happened again. His heartbeat quickened and his chest tightened. His body was in Remus's classroom, but his mind was in the graveyard again.
Remus strolled over casually, but seeing the look on Harry's face, a mixture of hatred and terror, he quickly ended the spell. "Harry?"
As soon as Harry could speak and move again he lashed out. "What the fuck, Remus?!"
Remus's eyes grew wide, more worried than angry. Harry was still on the ground, breathing hard. He ignored the boy's anger and crouched down beside him. "Are you ok?"
Harry hadn't completely lost control, but he had his eyes closed trying desperately to convince himself he was indeed ok. When he heard his godfather's voice, he opened his eyes just enough to glare at the man. "Why did you use that spell? I thought we were just playing around."
"We were, Harry," Remus said softly, trying his best to console the boy that looked both on the verge of crying and killing him. "We've used that spell before, remember?"
Harry just shook his head and rubbed his forehead, realizing that was true. It dawned on him that he wasn't actually angry at Remus. He was mad at himself for being stuck in the graveyard. He cursed and covered his face.
Remus sat down beside the boy, then waved his wand behind them so his desk would slide and allow them to lean against it. He then summoned two bottles of butterbeer and handed one to the boy. Harry accepted, then flashed the man apologetic eyes. "Sorry."
Remus nodded. "Is it safe to assume that spell was used against you that night?"
Harry sighed and nodded. "Yeah."
Remus patted his back. "I apologize as well. I didn't know."
"It shouldn't matter," Harry said angrily. "I don't know why my mind keeps going there."
"Because you went through something no person should ever have to experience that night, Harry. Something truly traumatic. It's completely normal for you to take some time to completely recover," Remus told him firmly. "You're far too hard on yourself."
"Not nearly as hard as Malfoy is going to be on me if I have a panic attack in the middle of class," Harry retorted. He took a sip of butterbeer. "But I guess I can give him detention if he does, since I'm a prefect now."
Remus chuckled. "You could, but keep in mind he can give you one too."
Harry looked at him incredulously. "He's a prefect too?"
"Oh yes," Remus told him, taking a drink from his own glass, "One of the last things Severus did before leaving was nominate him. To be fair, his grades are excellent." He bit back a laugh at Harry's scowl before continuing. "Setting that aside, I think it would be a good idea for you and I to come up with some sort of a signal, so that if something we're doing in class makes you uncomfortable, you can let me know."
It always impressed Harry how Remus could come up with solutions to his problems before Harry was even done panicking about them. "Like what?"
Remus shrugged. "Something subtle, but not so subtle that I won't notice you doing it. What if you were to…I don't know…pull your left ear?"
Harry nodded. "Ok, that works. You're not going to make it embarrassing though, are you? Like you did with the boggart?"
Remus's jaw dropped. "I did not make that embarrassing."
"Yes, you did," Harry told him, smiling now. "Everyone in the class thought that you thought I couldn't handle it."
Remus rolled his eyes. "This is probably hard for your teenage brain to understand, but other people are thinking of you far less than you think they are."
Harry smirked. "Dad says I'm the most famous teenager in the wizarding world."
Remus chuckled. "Fair point."
They sat in companionable silence for a few minutes before their conversation became more casual. They were just about to stand and put the room back together when Harry caught his godfather's attention again.
"Remus?"
"Hmm?"
"How do you think Dad is taking the Pettigrew news, really?"
Remus sighed and thought for a long moment before responding. "I suspect there is a part of Sirius that is hurting over losing someone he once thought to be a friend. I know I am, to be completely honest."
"Really?"
Remus nodded. "It's strange, really. I thought for 12 years that Peter was dead. I mourned him. And then I found out the truth, and that was almost like losing him again, just in a different way." He shifted a little, his face serious. "I mean, I hate what Peter did. Hate everything about it. But at the same time, this was the man that kept my secret and became an animagus just for me. And he turned out to be so awful. And because of that, I suspect that Sirius is also like me. There is a part of us that is hurting, and another part that wishes we had killed him ourselves."
Harry nodded. He understood that about as well as he could. "He did save my life," he said quietly.
"What I wish you to see," Remus responded, slowly and deliberately choosing his words carefully, "Is that he didn't Harry. He simply gave you a hint. You saved your own life because you are a very talented wizard and because you had good people on your side."
Harry met his eyes briefly, then nodded. "Yeah."
"And," Remus continued, "You're going to be ok, because you still are a talented wizard, and you still have good people on your side. Good people that love you."
