Starting Notes:
Welcome back! This chapter is… hmm, where Six Dimensions becomes literally nothing but fluff briefly. You're warned :) No duel in this chapter, just fluff and some… well, I'll leave it to you to see.
Chapter 80: A Mirror To The Future
"I can't believe that you asked Jack Atlas to give that monster a grave," Chino said, when Arisu returned back to her apartment. (Chino had been staying over lately, just because Arisu's apartment was far closer to the city centre than hers.) She picked up the bottle of shochu on the table—there was a glass in front of her, close to empty. "Want some?"
Arisu put down her bag, reaching over the kitchen counter and putting a glass on the table as well. "Sure," she said. "How'd you know about…"
"Makoto let me know. Kaname told him." Chino shook her head. She raised the bottle of shochu, pouring the alcoholic beverage into the glass. "Roget doesn't deserve this."
"... that's pretty ambiguous. What doesn't he deserve?"
"... to be remembered," Chino murmured. "But I guess you did it for Kaname, so… I guess I can hold back how angry I am about that."
Arisu sat down at the table. It was pretty early to be drinking—only half past eight. She leaned her head on her arm, not touching the glass yet. "What are you so bothered by today?" She asked. "I'm assuming that there's something else—otherwise, you wouldn't be drinking right now."
"… I was talking to one of those publishing companies that works on school textbooks today—Jack asked me to. And they were talking about how a lot of the history textbooks were biased and would need to be rewritten. The people who Jack put in charge of redoing the school syllabus were talking about putting the High Council's most heinous deeds into a textbook, to be studied."
"... what's wrong with that?" Arisu asked. She lifted the glass to her lips, sipping from it.
"... why is it that we reward the people who do the worst things by remembering their names?" Chino said. At that moment, there was something thickly hurt to her expression. Arisu remembered, all of a sudden, the unfortunate reality that this girl had likely been subjected to. Her father's death, with no one caring or remembering.
Even so…
"You know, Reiji Akaba says that there's a chance to bring back those who have been turned into cards," Arisu said. "If we figured it out… would you stop me from bringing the High Council back?"
"... you want to bring them back?"
"I would like to," Arisu said. "Them, and all the corrupt officers that you and Makoto carded."
"Why?"
"... it's not because I forgive them. And it's not because I want to have mercy on them either." Arisu took a quick drink, her eyes trained on Chino. "It's because I care for you. You and Makoto both. I know that you don't regret it… but I don't want you to carry the feeling for the rest of your life that you're a murderer."
"... if you do it, then I won't stop you," Chino finally said. "But still… something else that made me really angry. One of them said that they wanted to interview you and find out exactly about what happened, since you, I quote, are "the greatest living example of the tragedy caused by the High Council." They aren't treating you like a human being at all, just like a story for them to exploit."
"Greatest living example?" Arisu shook her head. "... to compare tragedies just isn't right."
"I just get so… angry, whenever people try to act like they sympathised with us, as though they were against the High Council all along. I get so upset when they try to turn you into a moral lesson, as though you don't have enough on your plate already—" Chino paused. "… I didn't mean to say that."
"I like you when you're honest."
"I don't. It makes things complicated."
Arisu laughed. Chino watched her, tilting her head slightly.
"Did I mention that I like your laugh?" She said. "You should laugh more."
Arisu blinked. "... oh, you're really drunk," she said after a moment. "You should lie down soon. How many glasses have you had?"
"I drank half of the bottle myself." Chino shook her head, before wincing. "... I am a little drunk." She stood up, feet slightly unsteady.
Arisu guided her to the couch, helping her to settle down, gently running her fingers through the other woman's hair to help her settle. Chino turned her head, nesting her nose in Arisu's stomach with a quiet yawn.
"When you first got a drink two years ago, I had to hold your hair back when you were throwing up," Arisu recalled.
"It was because you turned twenty, so you could actually buy it."
"Hah. You and Makoto were the ones that piggybacked on me for that, yes. Though I have no clue where Makoto got his cigarettes before that." Arisu let out a fond sigh. "I ended up having to supervise both of you, and you both stayed at my place."
"... I would like to keep staying."
"Keep staying?"
"With you," Chino said. "Rather than keep going back to that apartment… I'd like to stay with you. No, I want to stay with you."
It sent soft butterflies through Arisu's stomach.
"After this, when everything changes. If you're unhappy and you don't want to carry on working for this city, you can quit. If you want to stay, I'll stay. Just let me stay with you."
A soft sigh. "... this really feels like the kind of thing that you should say when both of us are more sober." Arisu gently drew her fingers through her hair.
"Do you dislike it?" Chino murmured. That would be the worst nightmare of all.
Arisu shook her head. Chino's breath left a warm spot on her skin. "No," she finally said. "I don't."
"Are you sure?"
"Pretty sure. If you want to, I'm sure that we can find a way for you to move in."
"… move in?"
"Was that not what you wanted?" Arisu's cheeks flushed red, and Chino looked up just in time to see that. "Did I misunderstand what you were asking? That's embarrassing…"
"It's more than I would ask for. More than I deserve." Chino turned to look at Arisu. "It's pretty cowardly to say this when I'm drunk, but there's something I've meant to tell you for a long time."
Arisu tilted her head, confused.
"I think I know already, from what we just said."
"No. It's not about feelings." Chino reached out, gripping onto Arisu's arm. She did not look at Arisu's face—she did not want to see what Arisu would look like when she was angry. "I knew about your history all along."
"... huh?"
"I was a coward," Chino confessed. "I didn't want to see your face if you knew. But if you're going to keep on working for this city… you need to know this. The ones who embezzled money seven years ago were the High Council." Arisu went still. "The ones who took the money were the five of them. They just needed a convenient target to pin it on—and your father was becoming popular at the time. The man who helped the Commons so much… the High Council was worried that he would become too popular in the city through support from the Commons, that he would help them revolt. So those bastards…"
"... if that's true…" Arisu shook her head. "How do you know about this?"
"Because my father was the one that helped them to do it," Chino said. The terrible secret finally released its hold on her throat. "I'm so, so sorry. It was my father who… and he didn't say anything to help…"
There was a terrible, paralysing moment when neither of them moved. Then—
"... I can't say that it's not a terrible thing to have to take in right now, after we were just talking about bringing them back," Arisu said.
Chino shook her head. "... my timing's never been good."
"Well, I know that much. How many years have we worked together now?" Arisu sounded tense, but not… angry. "Raise your head, Chino, I'm not mad at you. That's ridiculous."
"... but my father…"
"Seven years ago, you were twelve," Arisu shot back. "What could you have done? I'm not mad at you—maybe a little at your father, and definitely at those five dictators that we had to put up with for so long, but not at you. Maybe if you had told me this when we were younger, I might have been mad at you, but I'm in my early twenties now. I know that some things are greyer than they seem."
"I was just scared that you'd do something impulsive. That you'd go after the High Council and get yourself in even more trouble."
"I get that much, yes." Arisu reached forward, tilting Chino's chin up. The two of them made eye contact. "... well, stay. If you want, you can stay as long as you want."
Chino stared. Arisu smiled at her, and it felt like resolution and redemption at the same time.
Don't care about others, Chino had told herself so many times—cautioning herself, conditioning herself into apathy. Caring so deeply was the path to self-destruction. But she had always cared what Arisu Kirijo would think of her—a chink in her own armour, a woman that sometimes made her yearn to be kind.
A private kind of guilt, that had over time, merged with something that was a little like love.
But they weren't heroes marching off to war. They had time now.
If they reconstructed their home, couldn't they reconstruct themselves alongside it? Into something more human, more sane?
Chino would always carry some level of forced apathy to her. But maybe she could let go of the guilt with time. Maybe she would stop letting unearned guilt goad her into further violence.
"I turn twenty this year," she said. "Next time… I'll buy you the drink."
"I look forward to it," Arisu said, and she gently squeezed Chino's hand.
"Are you alright?"
Kaname turned her head. She nodded, after a moment.
"If you aren't," Makoto said, "you're allowed to say it, you know. I'll—I'll go with you—"
A shake of the head.
'Stay. Sister.' Stay with your sister. She needs you.
"I know," Makoto said after a moment. "Momoi has always been…" He sighed. "I know that I can't go with you. Fuck. Why did this have to happen right before you go? I can't even help you through it."
She turned her head, resting it on his shoulder.
'Okay. Comrades.'
"The Lancers had better well protect not just your life, but that heart of yours," Makoto said. "How much more can you take, Kaname? How much more until the world is finally done making you suffer in ways that you don't deserve? And you, you self-sacrificial…" He drew a hand through her hair. "How much longer will you continue to hold it all in? If I'm the only person that you can talk to, I can't just let you go—you'll come back to me with your heart shattered again."
Kaname shook her head. 'Goal.'
"You have a goal?'
'Destroy. School.' Academia was not an easy word to sign, but she trusted that Makoto would understand. 'Avenge. Myself. Family.'
"... fine. I can get behind that. But… don't take on more than you can handle. Your comrades can supposedly handle themselves, right? So, put yourself first."
A simple sign. 'Promise.'
She would keep it. Makoto was just one of the people that she had to keep safe. This entire city…
Throughout this entire experience, Kaname had learned what it meant to want to protect. She had learned what it felt like to want to save others. And now, in the place of dread, despair and hatred…
There was determination.
She would not lie down and wail her eyes out. She would not cry, because that would solve nothing.
She would make it so that Academia knew to fear the Ghost of Neo Domino City.
"You're back. I was waiting for you."
Mion looked at Reiji, somewhat surprised—he still sounded calm, but the fact that he had been waiting for her was strange. Didn't he have more important things to do right now, especially since they were leaving tomorrow? "Well, I'm here," she said. "Did you need my help?"
"When I went back the other day, I brought something back. I had it made a while back. Here."
He held out a box towards her. Mion noticed the logo on the top of the box—curved serif font. She had seen that logo on some of the jewellery that her mother owned back when they lived in their old apartment.
Wait. Was this…
She carefully opened the box. Inside it was a rose gold necklace. A small blue-green pendant could be seen on it—shaped like a teardrop, no border, simply hung from the chain by a small hole at the top. The pendant was the same colour as her eyes. There was something strange about the pattern on it though—Mion lifted it to her eye, looking into it. There was a certain magnification to it—a small hole at the front of the pendant, which, when lined up just right…
Revealed the landscape of Maiami City, an image within the gem, tinted green with light.
Mion quietly exhaled. She put the necklace back in the box, before closing it. She held it back towards Reiji.
"I think you should take this back," she said—voice crisp, maybe even sharp.
Reiji did not take the box back. His gaze was fixed on her. "Does it not suit your taste?"
It very much did—it was beautiful. The necklace itself wasn't the problem. Still, Mion steeled herself for the lie. "I don't like it," she said. "Why did you bother?"
"... you said that the only reason that you came back to Maiami City was because I asked you to," Reiji said. There was something tense to the air right now—cold and fragile. "Did I understand that wrongly?"
"... I don't know what you thought that you understood," Mion said. "But it has nothing to do with me. I have no use for things like this, Reiji."
"... you're not normally like this."
"That's because you're crossing the line."
"What line?" Reiji said—his fingers were tense, hands frozen at his sides. "The line between what?"
"You… know what it is," Mion said, unable to say it aloud. But there was no chance that Reiji Akaba would have commissioned such an obviously romantic gift and not understood the implications behind it. "Reiji. Why?"
"I should think that it speaks for itself," Reiji said. "What I don't understand is why you're being like this. Does this really offend you so much?"
That was true. It… wasn't fair of her to treat Reiji like this. No matter what his feelings were, no matter how much she did not want them to exist… she couldn't fault him for them. Especially because he didn't know.
Mion rubbed her forehead. "Sit down, Reiji," she said. "I need to explain something."
Once she explained it, maybe he would understand. Maybe they would be able to ignore this, put it aside. So she quickly, carefully explained everything.
"... that's why," she said. "There are some things that I know I shouldn't do."
"And so you're terrified of love," Reiji said. His gaze was… murky. "So that's why you keep your distance so much."
"Love killed my mother." Mion shook her head. "By the time that I was born, my mother had gone insane from it. From being used by a man and left behind. From believing that she was loved and realising that she wasn't. It's not a problem with you, Reiji, but I…"
She couldn't see any disappointment in his gaze—still unreadable. He was always so difficult to understand.
"I shouldn't," she said. "I really shouldn't. I promised her that I wouldn't love anyone, and more than that, I promised myself that I wouldn't end up like my mother. I can't end up like her."
"... all these 'shoulds' and 'coulds' and 'woulds'." Reiji raised his head, still looking directly at her. At that moment, he looked exactly like the aristocratic CEO that she'd always seen on the television. "You've said so much, Mion. But the one thing you haven't said this entire time is whether you do feel that way."
… why was he still pushing the matter?
Mion stood up—Reiji reached forward, grabbing her wrist—the hand that was still holding onto the box with the necklace. The two of them stared at each other in silent challenge—her leaning back slightly, him leaning towards her.
Regal, poised, assertive. This was the Reiji Akaba that would not stop until he'd gotten what he'd wanted—and in this case, what he was trying to pry out of her was an answer.
"If you stop considering whether it's right or wrong," he said, slow and deliberate. The touch of his fingers on her wrist was scalding. "If you stop considering promises and filial piety. If you stop letting a ghost ventriloquise you. What are—"
Mion tore her gaze away from him, turning away. "Stop it, Reiji."
"What," Reiji continued, "are the true feelings that you hold towards me?"
"Why can't you accept that I don't want to confront that answer?" Mion demanded—she kept her voice low, to not disturb anyone else in the house.
"Because I don't want to lose without a reason," Reiji said. "It's unreasonable of me, perhaps, but until I hear your answer clearly, I can't give up on this—I can't give up on you. If I do, I know that you'll leave once the war is over—I know that I'll never get the chance to know, to ask."
"What's so wrong with that?" Mion replied. "You're stronger than anyone. You're intelligent, analytical, wealthy and self-assured. I'm sure that you'll have no shortage of admirers. You'll find someone far more suitable for you. You don't need to be hung up on someone who'll make things so difficult for you."
Why did that thought sound so ugly to her, even as she voiced it aloud? Why did she hate those words?
"I could certainly find someone else," Reiji agreed. "But that someone else won't have your smile. She won't laugh like you do. In my eyes, you are not replaceable by anyone else."
The words shook Mion, despite her best efforts.
"I understand that by saying these words now, I am threatening the cohesion of our group, if it goes too poorly," Reiji said. "But this is the one selfish decision that I will make in this war—to say these words, because I know that even if you hate me for them, you'll still be capable of putting the Lancers before your emotions."
"Reiji, don't," Mion warned.
Reiji lifted her wrist, leaning in closer. "I like you, Mion Myojin," he said. "The first time that I saw you, it was before you were even hired as Reira's tutor. The first time that I saw you, it was when you were having one of your first duels in LDS. You had nothing. You had cards like Blue Medicine and Black Pendant in your deck, but you were still winning with it against people with far more resources than you. But the moment that I fell for you was after classes that day. I was on the way to a meeting, and I happened to look out of the window—and you were balancing several different objects, despite your issues with your arm. You didn't show any discomfort, any disappointment—you just did what had to be done, without any complaints, because you knew that you had to."
Every word that he spoke was like a live wire coming loose. It made this topic even harder to ignore. It made him harder to ignore, even though Mion wanted so desperately to ignore it—to go back to how they'd been just this morning, without this knowledge.
"I won't let you close this away in a box and forget it," Reiji said. "I've put it out into the open. I like you. I can't take those words back—and I wouldn't, even if I could."
"... you are such a horrible man," Mion said—and she almost meant it, too. "Don't you understand? You want more than I can give!"
"You're being just as unreasonable as I am towards yourself," Reiji shot back. "The only thing that I'm asking for is that you actually allow yourself to think about it. If you didn't have all of these things in the way… how exactly do you feel? Even if you can't think about the words, the feelings are still there. If you think through everything and tell me that you don't have feelings for me, I'll accept that and step back. But Mion—don't push me away just because someone told you to. Do it because you actually want to."
… he sounded resolute, but…
This was likely the closest that Reiji Akaba had ever come to pleading with her.
It was clearly selfish in some ways, but…
She could hear genuine concern in his voice too. Beyond wanting her to return his feelings, he did not want her to carry on keeping that promise.
And Mion realised something at that exact moment. She shut her eyes, slowly breathing out.
She had thought to herself that Reiji found it much harder to say no to her.
As it turned out, when she was faced with the same sincerity from him…
It was just as hard for her to say no to him.
It was just self-reflection, anyway. No matter how terrifying it was…
It was a good question. Why did she try to stay by his side, why did she forgive him so easily, why did she worry about him enough to visit him in the middle of the night, why did she always get so angry when she thought about what he must have gone through, all on his own?
What exactly did she feel towards him?
She had thought that she might despise him for his confession, be disappointed in him for it, but the room in her heart that she had expected to give to that disgust was already occupied. She had wanted to hate him for making her think about something that she'd already considered a part of her existence for so long, but she couldn't bring herself to. If what she felt for him in this moment wasn't hatred, could it be…
Could it be love? The very thought felt sacrilegious, but…
Ah, Mion thought resignedly. That might be it.
It looks like from the start, I've already been betraying that promise by choosing to stay by his side.
She opened her eyes. Reiji was watching her concernedly.
"I can't promise you anything," she said, in lieu of an actual answer. "I don't know what I want, either."
"That's alright. I think you've been poisoned by promises and obligations for long enough. I don't need that from you."
"... it's not that easy to shake it off either. I still hear her, sometimes." And she was back in that car again. "I'll think about it, Reiji. Eventually, I'll be honest with myself. But I won't let it affect our cooperation—I'm still a Lancer, and you're still my leader."
Reiji nodded. He let go of her wrist—both the skin of her wrist and the tips of his fingers were red from the prolonged contact. They made eye contact again—and he seemed softer now. Or maybe he'd never been cold in the first place, and it had just been Mion's fear of being seen through. Maybe it was both. He reached out to touch the box in her hand, opening it—pulling out the necklace, he gently placed it around her neck—his fingers left lingering warmth there, as he hooked the clasp gently on the chain. His cheek was barely an inch from hers. Once he was done, he drew back.
The fact that she hadn't rejected his touch…
Perhaps that was already acceptance.
"... see you tomorrow," Mion said, when she found her breath again.
"See you tomorrow," Reiji returned.
When he left to walk to his room, Mion picked up the pendant.
A pendant with Maiami City hidden in the heart of it.
She could almost hear Reiji's voice—the obvious sentiment that lay within the secret of the necklace.
Stay.
Her heart was beating slightly faster.
… she could at least pretend for a bit longer.
"Can't sleep?"
"Yeah," Ruri said. "I just can't believe that we're going home."
"You've been away from home for a very long time," Yuto agreed. He reached out, squeezing her hand. "... I hope that everyone back home is still safe."
"Well, everyone is really strong!" Ruri smiled at him. "I hope… I really hope that everyone's fine. I want to see Sayaka again, too."
"I hope so," Yuto agreed. "... I'm looking forward to it. I wonder what's changed… it'll be hard to get used to it, but hopefully, everyone there will still trust us."
"Everyone looks up to Shun, and everyone trusts Nue," Ruri pointed out, smiling fondly. "And we're there too. You'll see, Yuto, we'll win, and we'll go back to those days in the past."
… Yuto really hoped so.
There had to be a chance to return things to normal.
"I'll protect you, no matter what," he vowed. "When we go back… I'll protect everyone."
"I know," Ruri said. She leaned in, kissing his cheek sweetly. "You're a knight, after all! You'll protect everyone—and I'll do the same!"
Yuno had been shooting her worried glances all evening. In the end, Miharu took the initiative and walked over to him as he was getting a glass of juice.
"You wanted to show me something, right?"
Yuno looked hesitant. "Is it a… good time?"
"… it already happened. I just have to accept it." She shot him a smile. She wasn't completely fine, but this was the best way to feel better—spending time with him. "… take my mind off it?"
"… well, that much I can do!" Yuno grinned—he was clearly really looking forward to this, and Miharu didn't have the heart to stop him. "Hold on, okay? I have to grab something."
In the end, Yuno grabbed a large bag from upstairs, and then the two of them headed out. They settled in one of the parks, by a river.
"So, what did you want to show me?" Miharu asked.
"It's a song," Yuno said, smiling. "Will you listen?"
"I always listen to you," Miharu said, and when he laughed, it was like watching a magic trick—sleight of hand, that moment of wonder and surprise and amazement. As though she was suspended in the moment—a moment that longed to last forever. A lightness that she felt most strongly when she was with him.
"Okay," he said. He was already holding onto a guitar—had he borrowed it from someone? His fingers lightly drew themselves over the strings. "I'll sing for you then. Just you—I thought about doing it as a big performance, but I know you prefer things more private. That's why we came all the way out here." A soft, tender smile. "And well… I hoped that you would be in a better mood, but I guess I wanted to cheer you up." He pressed a few buttons on his duel disk. "The original song that I wrote needed drums and the keyboard, so Nue-san and Hitoda helped me with playing the background. I'll do the guitar live though."
"Dramatic," Miharu commented. "You wrote a song?"
"I wrote a song," Yuno agreed. He winked. "You know what I'm capable of! Here we go."
He strummed the strings, and as he sang, Miharu listened to him quietly. His gold eyes sparkled under the night as he played the song, a smile lightly dancing on his lips.
When I see you, I think that you must be
The sweetest memory that anyone could ever hold
Stars and galaxies collide, wars wage themselves for eternity
I can't claim to care about it all
But I can dare to dream that someday, with this paintbrush
I'll steal the stars from the sky, and paint them
Into a dream of you and me.
Our loneliness has been that of the sun and the moon
How long have you cried without learning to laugh?
[***]
All these symphonies and dazzling shows
All these times I performed for others but only looked for you
Did I ever find that bridge that could lead me to you?
Or perhaps a ladder, a pair of wings
A fairy tale answer that I used to shield myself from
The truth that by putting myself on a stage
I stood loved, but I stood alone.
[***]
Can I ask you if you are a dream?
You shine as brightly as the sun
If the heart is an arrow, it longs to land true
Heroes search for the big picture, but I admire the view
And from now, if it's not clear, I sing only for you
I was put on this world to love you
[***]
When I see you, I think you must be
The most terrifying person the world has made
How can you be so kind when the world hurts you instead?
I want to hold you close and keep you with the flowers
Between us, sacrifice dangles like a red thread
Selfishly, I do not wish to see you burn for me.
In this world, all I want is your heart
Hand in hand, longing never to part
I know your heart, and I know mine
In life and death, I will defend you
And make the world my enemy, if it ever turns against you
[***]
In this world, parting is such sweet sorrow
There is nowhere you could fall where I would not follow
Like the trees that stand guard through winter
I will be waiting to take your hand.
The flowers that await their chance to push away the snow
Bloom the most beautifully of all.
And nothing feels more alive in the world
Than the spring flowers that bloom through the coldest fall.
[***]
I will not promise to love you forever
Because good things do not last
You and I know that too well
If the world forces me to leave you,
I would rather forget everything and lose my mind
Than live my days knowing that I've betrayed you.
Like faded petals, let me become a lost dream
A hurt that will last only for a second
But never scar you like before.
[***]
Can I ask you if you are a dream?
You glimmer like the watchful moon
If the heart is an arrow, it longs to land true
Heroes search for the big picture, but I admire the view
And from now, if it's not clear, I sing only for you
I was put on this world to love you
In this world, I'm glad that I found you
After that, it was just a quick, light-hearted instrumental. His fingers strummed the last few notes, and then he shot her a relaxed smile—head on her shoulder, lips quirked upwards. In the song, he had expressed every sentiment that he had wanted her to know. And now, he was just watching her.
Waiting for her answer—as always.
Always so patient.
Miharu had been watching him the entire time. Every word was so soft, so sweet… so Yuno.
I was put on this world to love you.
Her heart was not built for this level of emotion. Overflowing, longing to escape her.
"In this world, all I want is your heart," she mused, the words light on her lips. "Hand in hand, longing never to part." She knew the quote well enough—she knew that despite its romance, it came from verses that were far less romantic in nature. She picked out a different line, rolling it over her tongue as well. "Sir, your heart has changed, and thus I have come of my own volition to part from you."
Yuno let out a quiet snort. "Way to take the romance out of it."
"... I don't know if my heart will change in the future," Miharu said. "But right now, I do know what I feel." She reached out, taking his hand and gently entwining their fingers together.
Was she shy? Was she nervous about admitting her feelings—feelings that were so obvious that they wouldn't serve as any kind of revelation at all?
Yes. And yes, of course.
But…
We've gone through so much together. We are our own separate people, with our own lives and our own motivations. We were not destined to come together and find each other, but we did. That's not fate, that's a blessing. Yuno, you're the greatest blessing of my life.
We fled from our home together with no hope of salvation or safety. I sacrificed an offer of safety because I knew that it would doom you. We were torn apart, and we fought to return to each other's side. We shared our secrets, we hoped for the best, and then we were turned against each other—weapons to harm the other. And after that…
After going through all of that…
Our feelings have been tested enough, haven't they? How much more must we go through for us to be able to hold these feelings in our hands and say "this is love"?
Is there a point to not saying it, when we can look in each other's eyes and know it so deeply?
She didn't say those words aloud, but she hoped that she conveyed the intensity of her feelings in her gaze, her expression, the warmth of her hand in his.
"You are," she said, "not my sweetest memory, because a memory is the past. You're my present. You're not my dream, because you're the one that roots me in reality. Yuno, you're…"
She stopped for a moment. She considered her words—and made sure that the emotion behind them carried through.
"You're my sunlight," she said. "I… really like you, Yuno. I really do. It's always been you."
Yuno breathed out. "I know," he said, his smile still just as light and relaxed as before. "But it's good to hear it, still. I don't want to waste any more time, Miharu." He wrapped his other arm around her, leaning into her. His voice was teasing—and yet, softly genuine. "I'll tell you that I love you over and over again, as many times as it takes for you to agree that we can stop calling each other friends."
"... then maybe I shouldn't agree, so that I can hear you say it again and again," Miharu said. Yuno let out a soft, whining noise—not quite a complaint. Half-amusement, half-protest. Their fingers were still entwined, but Miharu reached out with her other arm, wrapping it around Yuno and pulling him closer. Usually, it was him that approached her, with his unfiltered adoration and affection—as such, when he looked at her, there was delight in his eyes. "You haven't actually said it yet—you've sung it, sure, but are those just pretty words?"
Yuno put a hand over his chest, pretending to be offended. "Do you think that I'd just speak pretty words to you? I'm mortally offended, wounded, even—" He broke off into laughter for a brief moment, but when he spoke up, he was serious again. "Well, I love you, Miharu. Always have, always will."
… ah. She hadn't meant for him to actually say it again so quickly. She hadn't calmed down yet, from the happiness that threatened to pull apart her composure.
"Me too," she said. "... I don't mind calling you my boyfriend. And I don't mind being your girlfriend either. Is that what you want to hear?"
"I want to hear that you like me again," Yuno said with a playful wink. "Or do you dare to use that other word?"
"... you know," Miharu said after a moment, feeling her cheeks flush slightly, "I'm beginning to realise that you're actually a flirt."
"I've been flirting with you shamelessly for six years, so it's good that you finally picked up on that," Yuno said. He leaned forward, arms wrapped around her in a hug—he was warm, comforting. "And I'll probably keep doing it. No worries though, I'll only flirt with you from now on."
"You're so over the top," Miharu said.
"But you like it," Yuno said.
Miharu nodded, squeezing his hand. "I really do." She looked him in the eyes. He wanted to hear it again, right? She spoke up—every word sincere. "Even in this world, even if we feel like we must go our own ways eventually, I do feel like I want to defend you. No matter what, I love you, Yuno. And I hope that I'll only ever love you in this way."
Yuno's eyes widened—and then, they somehow grew even more warm. Soft fondness. Miharu felt breathless again.
She then remembered what she had meant to tell him, too. "… h-hold on. I have something for you."
"Oh?" Yuno cocked his head. "You made something too? Was I not the only one who was going to confess today?"
Miharu had been going to confess something else, but now, there could be something more meaningful to it. His arm stayed around her as she fumbled with the bag she had brought with her, taking out her laptop.
"Oh? You coded something?"
"… repurposed," Miharu said. "She's still pretty young, but she's one of my first successful prototypes. I finished their training just one or two days ago."
"… she?"
Miharu tapped a few keys on the keyboard, and then she gestured to Yuno to hold out his duel disk. A few more, a connecting wire, and then it was complete. "Pandor," she called out. "Say hello." In the small circular part of Yuno's duel disk, a small humanoid figure popped out—Yuno let out a startled sound. She was very small—the avatar didn't actually take up any physical space, it simply projected Pandor into the world using the VRAINS AR. Pandor's design was primarily light blue and white, with light blue 'hair' across the front of her face. Her shoulders, legs and feet were black.
"Hello," the AI said—her voice was feminine, but far more stern than Miharu's own. Rather matter-of-fact. She looked at Miharu, and then she turned to Yuno. "Ah. Hello. You must be Yuno Sugisaki."
"Uh, yes." Yuno blinked. "You're… Pandor?"
"My designation is Pandora, but I prefer Pandor," the AI said calmly.
"She's an AI with free will," Miharu explained. "More importantly, she's an AI who I trained to have programming and coding skills similar to mine. So as long as she's with you, I don't have to worry that you're somewhere that I can't help you—if Pandor can't help you, my skills probably won't make the problem better either."
"I'm hardly on your level yet, mother," Pandor said. Yuno looked at the small AI, before slowly turning his head towards her.
"Mother," he repeated.
"... my designation in the database is just Miharu," Miharu said, feeling slightly wronged. "Pandor and Poppy, for some reason, insist on calling me their mother."
"Poppy," Yuno said dryly.
As though things couldn't get any more embarrassing for Miharu, a small face appeared on her duel disk—two arches that curved upwards in a cheerful expression, despite lacking a mouth. "That's me!" Another voice called from within the duel disk. "Though I go by Roboppi!"
"Robot poppy," Miharu said. "Both of them were pretty independent about choosing their names—though Roboppi doesn't mind when I call him Poppy, so I do that sometimes. And they both have pretty distinctive personalities, which is a sign of success in the specific method I'm using. I haven't finished the small AR avatar that I was making for him yet."
"So they're both AI that you made?"
"The only two successful prototypes," Miharu said. "I was going to show them to you first, before anyone else… I've been working on them for a long time now."
Two years ago:
"You're working on that program again, aren't you?"
Miharu tilted her head upwards. Her brother had just come home, and was now pouring himself a cup of tea at the kitchen counter. "I failed again," she said.
"You know," Ryoken remarked, "you've been working on that project, on and off, for about five years now." He walked over. "And this isn't the first time that it's failed either. I know your skill, Miharu, and I know you. If you've failed to do it so many times, it may just be impossible."
"Maybe," Miharu said noncommittally. "But failing is just another way to start over." She had already started from scratch, and she was now checking through the code that she had written at the start of the whole project. It was far easier, in this case, to just start from scratch and salvage what she could from what she had already created.
"You still haven't told me exactly what you're so driven to create."
Miharu looked at her laptop again. "... I'll tell you when I'm done," she promised. "Or when I give up. One of the two things."
"Well, then I'll have to wait for your success. You're not the type to give up. But if it's so difficult… it must be something truly revolutionary."
"Not really," Miharu murmured. "It's a prototype. I want to help others with it, if I can figure out how to make it… work." She closed her laptop. "But I'll stop working for now. What's for dinner tonight, big brother?"
"Dad's bringing back takeout. Fish and chips." Ryoken gestured towards her laptop. "Do you have a name for the project, at least?"
"... name?" Miharu blinked. "Yes. But since it's different each time I redo it, I do give each individual one a name too."
"Each individual one?" Ryoken echoed. He smiled. "... you revealed a bit too much there, if you're trying to keep this project a secret."
"... I'll be more careful next time," Miharu said. Her brother nodded and patted the top of her head, and that was that.
In the present:
"I'm glad that you didn't give up, mama," Roboppi said—sounding remarkably cheerful. "Pandor and I wouldn't exist otherwise!" Yuno hid a smile, watching as Miharu casually talked to the AI.
"Every time I think that I can't be more impressed by you, I'm proven wrong," Yuno said. "Nice to meet you, Roboppi, Pandor. Do you really need an AI to help you with coding though, Miharu?"
"Nope!" Roboppi displayed a laughing emoji on his 'face', from where it was displayed on Miharu's duel disk. "Pandor and I were designed as a pair! Twins, mama always says." Yuno saw Miharu sigh, though there was something fond to it. "Pandor was made for coding and programming, but I'm a therapy bot!"
"Therapy bot?"
"Mm!"
"Maybe I should explain that," Miharu said. "Both Pandor and Roboppi can read our physiological signs if they are connected to our duel disks. In that way, if I'm in distress… Roboppi will be able to tell and calm me down."
"Yup! Mama won't have to worry while I'm here!"
Yuno thought about Miharu curling up in distress, and he nodded, banishing the image from his head immediately. "Great to know," he said. He reached out, squeezing her hand. "I'm glad you won't have to be afraid and alone. What about Pandor?"
"Pandor can…" Miharu hesitated. "You know about those times when you black out?"
… yeah. Those times when he hurt other people without meaning to? When something else seemed to take control of his body?
"My hope is that something about you changes when that happens," Miharu said. "Whether it's your heartbeat, your breathing… if it changes, then Pandor can figure it out and try to talk you out of it. Either that, or…" She sighed. "... I hope you don't mind this. But Pandor has the ability to lock your duel disk off, specifically in that situation—it's a special protocol, in case something happens again."
Yuno looked at her.
Locking his duel disk off in that situation…
"So I won't be able to hurt anyone when I'm like that?"
"Hopefully."
Yuno nodded. So he wouldn't be able to duel someone and hurt them like he had Miharu, like he had the others back in Standard. He didn't have to worry that he would lose his mind and hurt those that he cared about. "... thanks, Miharu," he said softly. "I've been… very worried. I don't know what's wrong with me, why I'm…"
"... whatever's going on, it's not your fault," Miharu said. She leaned into him. "We'll figure it out, Yuno."
"And you don't need to worry, papa!" Roboppi chimed in. "Pandor and I will do our best too! And mama's the best, so with her around, you'll never get in trouble!"
Yuno blinked. Papa, huh? He grinned. "Thanks! I agree that your mama is absolutely wonderful." He turned to Miharu with a teasing smile. "So let me get this straight. You called me over the top for singing you a song, when your response to my confession was to give me two AI children to co-parent with you."
"Your name is just Yuno in the database, or Boundless Sea," Miharu said with a sigh.
"But he's your special person, mama," Roboppi said cheerfully. "So he's our papa, right, Pandor?"
Pandor smiled wryly—it occurred to Yuno that the young AI did have a sense of humour. He wasn't quite so used to AI with such obvious personalities. "I suppose so. Unless you have a problem with it, father."
"Well, I would hate to leave Miharu a single mother."
"Yuno…"
"Sorry, sorry, Miharu." Yuno couldn't help but smile. "Really, thanks. And I'm looking forward to working with you too, Pandor."
"And me, and me, right?"
"Yes, you too, Poppy." Yuno chuckled. "So, should we head back and rest now, Miharu?"
Miharu nodded. They both stood up—Miharu tripped, and Yuno caught her. Both of them laughed. His hand slipped into hers—
And together, they walked back to the dorms—perfectly content.
End Notes:
This chapter is shorter than usual, because well, it was split off from the previous chapter's ending. Still, it was a fun chapter to write precisely because of that. Miharu and Yuno's confession + Pandor and Roboppi's introduction has been written since literally before Chapter 1 was written. I thought about holding back the chapter to give myself buffer time, but I'll be pretty upfront—it's going to take me like more than a whole week to write the next chapter, I think. Maybe. So I might as well give you guys something now. It's Chapter 75-level content-wise, though perhaps not length-wise.
But yeah, the "how many romance arcs can I advance at once" chapter is here! If 75 was the slice of life episode, this is the soap opera episode. If it feels like there's some characters that should appear in this chapter that don't, just, uh, remember that these two chapters were once one single chapter, so that's why characters like Yugo, Rin, etc don't appear here.
I do love the contrast between couples in this chapter specifically. Mion and Reiji are so functional in every way except in figuring out romance. They talked for 2k words and still didn't actually end up together yet. Meanwhile, both Yuno and Miharu go completely overboard with their confessions, lmao. One writes a whole ballad and the other codes two full AI. Drama queens.
It's important to me that Yuno and Miharu only start a relationship now once they both make a commitment to address and figure out their own individual issues. Healthy and balanced relationships, my beloved.
Thank you for tolerating my attempts at writing something that looks remotely lyrical. The song that Yuno sings is genuinely not based on anything. I just wrote the whole thing in Chinese as very metaphorical lines because that's what I'm used to, and asked my more musical friend to tweak it so that it looked more like something that a person could sing. That's why it still mostly looks poetic instead of lyrical. There are a few references in it though, so:
- "Parting is such sweet sorrow" is from Romeo and Juliet, though it takes on a very different meaning here.
- "in this world, all I want is your heart. Hand in hand, longing never to part." This is a very liberal translation of a romantic verse in Chinese, aka "愿得一人心, 白首不相离". The more literal translation is probably something like "if I could have your love, I would never leave you until our hair turns grey." I adjusted it to make it more lyrical. The line is typically used as a romantic promise, but the poem that it comes from actually isn't that romantic. What Miharu responds with is a different line from the same poem, "闻君有两意, 故来相决绝". Essentially, "I know that your heart has changed, so let us part ways."
But yeah. After 80 chapters, Yuno and Miharu are finally officially together. I would call this slow burn, but we're only like 20% in, so I don't think it quite qualifies.
It's also been very important to me that Miharu and Yuno are the first couple in this entire story to use 'love' instead of 'like'. That's intentional, and it's also based on the characters' personalities. I might write a Tumblr post explaining that, since I doubt anyone will ever explain it in-universe. We'll probably get the stronger l-word in the future for them, but… yeah.
(Also no. They don't kiss yet. :) Because I enjoy making things go slowly even now (read: I enjoy tormenting you all.))
Yuno: "So I wrote a whole ballad for you, just to ask you to be my girlfriend, even though you'd probably say yes if I just asked."
Miharu: "Because I want to stop Chapter 51 from happening again, I coded two whole AI to help me with your trauma and help you with your supernatural bullshit."
Roboppi and Pandor were always going to come in, because… *ahem* I love Roboppi and Pandor. I hate that Season 3 of VRAINS gave both of them pretty much a terrible ending. I'm sure that Six Dimensions' Roboppi and Pandor won't meet the same fate, right? :) But yeah, Roboppi's canon admiration of Ai is converted over to Miharu, since she's technically his creator in this universe. He's still the same character… just instead of a cleaning bot, he's a therapy bot, because Miharu's solutions to her problems usually lie in the digital realm. The usage of "mama" by him is a deliberate alignment with "big bro" for Ai, since both are more informal and affectionate.
… also, Roboppi and Pandor essentially being Yuno and Miharu's AI kids in this fic is unceasingly funny to me because I planned that out, and then I later realised that if Roboppi's hair in his human form was dark blue, he would deadass be a younger version of Yuno's avatar. Maybe not clothing-wise, but most certainly in terms of colour-scheme. He even has red and orange in his hair, aka Yuno's IRL hair colours! :) And most importantly, he has yellow-gold eyes like Yuno. Pandor also really has a pretty ironic design in Six Dimensions' context, but… yeah. The two of them will play a role, but their largest role is in the Link Arc, for obvious reasons :)
Also, for such a short chapter, there's a surprising amount of foreshadowing here. :) No, I will not elaborate.
Review responses!
To TheRealD3lph0xL0v3r, glad that you enjoyed the duel.
To PhilJS89, partially correct on the Anesidora part! Skirting around spoilers, Anesidora is an epithet used for three figures. "Anesidora" means "sender of gifts", but it's an epithet for three figures in mythology. If you look up those figures… you might be able to tell why that term at least aligns with Miharu, even if you might not guess the plot significance of it. "Feast on her flesh" actually wasn't meant to be a reference, but now that you mentioned it, I spontaneously remembered it, haha. I'll think about the Roget scene, but it really is gory though. I'm glad that you find Yugo more fleshed-out! Totally get the dysregulation, no worries. I'm happy to see you back after such a long time though! :)
To AccurateGap1, the OP of the whole arc (in Chapter 27), while symbolic, actually foreshadowed like 80% of the arc, so yeah, you're definitely right about that :) Yuya and Yuji definitely get more interactions in future arcs—the potential for different mindsets there is too interesting.
To LHOCIN, yup, the last chapter was definitely the grand finale of the arc :) Sorry that there weren't that many character interactions here—in the end, this chapter was meant to be more of an aftermath rather than a big, fluffy chapter. Your speculations are particularly interesting as well ;3
To MochiYoshi, that's fair. Honestly, writing is really hard. I've been doing creative writing both for original work and fanfiction for nearly twelve years now, and I still sometimes struggle with the style of what I'm writing. As for the big sis group… hmm. Fascinating thought. *whistles*
To Bryz0n, Assault Mode is such an interesting concept, even if it is power-crept heavily nowadays. Also, "Miharu can't catch a break" is pretty much the motto of this whole fic, lmao. I might drop one or two teasers about Xyz on Tumblr once I'm done with the arc? We'll see how it goes.
To naminexriku2468, mm, I'll take down the questions! :D
To Ben23ten, yeah, it never sat right with me that Yuya became King and then immediately left the city either. And especially because Synchro didn't actually seem to change much about their mindset, I always assumed that they might reject Jack for losing too. A lot of those plans, etc that you mentioned were pushed to the first chapter of the Xyz Arc, so you'll see it there! As for the Synchro Dimension, while we will definitely focus on some of the long-term rebuilding… that part's going to have to take a backseat for now, since the short-term plans are still in motion, and the Lancers do have to leave.
To Enigmathenightmare, oh, those are really great questions, actually! Thanks for reviewing :)
To CruelDiamond422, nah, it's fine. I too read fic at an ungodly hour in the morning. Anyway, I have a standing policy that I don't answer questions about decks or cards until they actually show up in the story, because that's just spoilers. So, to make things clear, I am not confirming whether or not Silenforc will show up at all. I was just trying to avoid spoilers completely. As a result, I can't answer your other question either. No offence intended, but I'm also not bending that policy. :)
To phantomdragons, tbh, I think I have it worse than you on that front, because in my brain, I've already substituted most of canon with my headcanons. So I totally get the Mion thing. I prefer my own canon too. :) And yes, here's your good, fluffy chapter. :D
To cardfan135, maybe diffusion occurred with the emoticons. :) And yeah, you barely made it in time.
QOTC: What other fandoms are you in/do you read fics consistently from?
Since Chapters 79 and 80 were supposed to be the same chapter (but got split up for the sake of pacing, so that Jack vs Yugo didn't have to share space with the confession scenes), I will confirm this—this is the last chapter in the Synchro Arc that takes place in the Synchro Dimension. The Lancers leaving the Synchro Dimension and arriving in the Xyz Dimension will be the first chapter of the Xyz Arc.
So, you're probably asking—if that's the case, what exactly is Chapter 81? Why is it specifically the last chapter of the arc before the Q&A?
… *clears throat* I did promise that we would be visiting the Fusion Dimension one more time before the arc ended, didn't I? :) So we have that and a few more things in store!
See you next time! Reminder of the Q&A, and also, I'm adjusting the date (because that anniversary date is coming close, yikes, and I want to be done with the arc fully before the anniversary for… reasons.) I initially set it to be pretty lenient (three days, if I'm not wrong), but considering that ffnet alerts are up… :) Well, it'll be 24 hours after the next chapter is posted now. Or honestly, you can also use Guest reviews, if you've already reviewed the chapter—just put your username in the name of the review and I'll attribute it to you in the spreadsheet :)
