The week after the 'succ-ening,' as Kazuma had taken to mentally calling it, had been 'interesting' to say the least. He had returned to working his desk job, slowly chipping away at his now-overwhelming mountain of debt and was starting to appreciate just how amazing Luna had been at juggling every demand the guild had. He'd managed to scare the living daylights out of Megumin by reaching a claw-like hand over a seemingly-empty counter one lunchtime and effectively conscripting her into being his 'assistant' by playing on her guilt. Aqua meanwhile had been… 'Difficult', largely helping out at the Eris church.
Whenever she wasn't having problems, that was.
Rather than abating as Kazuma had hoped, Aqua's volatility had only gotten worse over the course of the week. At times she was the model of helpfulness, cheer and if anything, happier than she'd ever been, even humming to herself as she worked. The next, she'd be the image of a 'crazy Axis Cultist' that most people knew and dreaded meeting. In an act of mercy, Luna let it slide the first time she tried pressuring people into signing away their faith, but with Aqua's increasingly venomous response to refusal, her patience quickly wore thin. Just as she was going to call Aqua in to answer some direct questions about what the hell she was playing at, an unexpectedly august guest paid the guildhall a visit, to discuss the matter personally.
"Young man? I wonder if I might have a word with Guildmaster Luna?"
Kazuma looked up at the calm and gentle voice of the old man before him. The short, gray hair and round, rimless glasses looked somewhat familiar, but he couldn't quite place them, as he took in the man's simple robes, typical of a lay member of Eris's clergy. Kazuma sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. "Dammit, not another complaint about Aqua, is it? I'm sorry, but I can't let you in to see Luna without an appointment. I'll let her know why you stopped by though - I'm really sorry about that idiot."
"While it certainly is concerning that young lady, this isn't exactly a complaint," the old man smiled, shaking his head. "And I believe Guildmaster Luna will see me." He reached into his robes and pulled out a chain, hanging from which was a holy sigil of Eris, wrought from gold.
Kazuma's eyes almost jumped out of their sockets as it finally clicked where he'd seen the old man before! Without the usual robes of office, he simply hadn't realized he was talking to the town's Bishop of Eris, the highest local authority in the church, but there was no mistaking that lavish symbol!
"Y-your Excellency! I- O-of course, I'll show you right up!" Kazuma wheezed, his heart in his mouth. He could only imagine what disaster Aqua had caused to get the bishop himself down here, or how much it was going to cost him!
Kazuma led the bishop upstairs and knocked, before bowing him into Luna's room. Unable to stop himself, he placed an ear up against the door, eavesdropping shamelessly, just as a precaution, just in case Aqua had done something he'd have to kill her for, like break the belltower or something.
"Ah, dear Luna, I haven't seen you in church in so long. Still holding on to the tenants of Eris though, I hope?" the bishop greeted Luna, opening his arms welcomingly for her. He had been a staple within Axel's society for longer than most everyone, so he felt like everybody's grandpa and Luna was by no means an exception.
"Father Royce!" she exclaimed with a smile, standing up to take his hands and give him a hug. "It really has been too long, I'm sorry. It's so good to see you though, to what do I owe the pleasure?"
"Ah, well, I'm sorry to say, but it seems that that Axis girl of yours might be in a bit of a pickle," he sighed,taking a seat and folding his hands, sighing quietly in relief as he got to rest. Despite aging fairly gracefully, all things considered, he was not a young man anymore and one didn't see over sixty winters without starting to stiffen and ache a little.
"Oh no, what did Aqua do now?" Luna groaned, resignation in her voice. She really did like the girl, even going so far as to consider her a friend, but Eris above, she was frustrating sometimes and recently more so than ever! Just when things had seemed to be going so well with her and Kazuma too…
"Oh, I think you misheard me," Father Royce shook his head gently, holding up a hand to forestall Luna's worries. "I said she is in a pickle, not causing it. Tell me, have you heard anything about the Axis Order as of late?" With a bit of luck, Luna would have the background already - adventurers tended to have wide networks of friends, after all.
Luna shook her head, sitting opposite him and uncertain what those crazies had to do with anything. "No, I haven't. With how they treat visitors, the guild's not really keen to send anyone their way and over time, things have kinda turned into a sort of mutual neglect. They solve their own problems, or pay enough for local freelancers to put up with their nonsense. Why? Is something happening?" The fact that a bishop of Eris had heard before her was mildly concerning. With how the Axis Cult typically treated Erisites, there was little chance he'd come with good news.
"You could certainly say that," Royce sighed. He'd blessedly not had to deal with much in the way of crises in his time and with any luck this one would leave peaceful little Axel un-touched too. "You see, given their hostility to our faith, The Holy Church of Eris keeps an eye on events within the Axis Order and recently, there have been rumors of a serious doctrinal split within their ranks. If the reports are true, then I might even go so far as to call it a full-blown heresy." His serious expression was mirrored by Luna. The Axis Cult had a not-unearned reputation for fanaticism and while the followers of Eris had avoided such a blight, they both knew that wars within a faith were always the most bitterly-fought.
"I see," Luna muttered, tapping her finger on her desk and frowning deeply. Honestly, next to the rumors, Aqua's evangelicalism seemed relatively mild, but if she was privy to a potential reformation within her faith, that would certainly go a long way toward explaining her temperamental nature of late. She may not be totally excused, but anyone would be stressed while under pressure like that! "Strange though, I thought the Axis Order was fairly homogenous - notably so, in fact. That's hardly the kind of environment a fissure like this develops, isn't it? Is there any word on what kind of extremism this new faction is preaching?" Gods forbid, if these reformists were even worse than usual, Aqua might be in danger… Or worse, what if she fell in with their beliefs?
"That's the strangest part!" Royce chuckled, spreading his hands in honest surprise. "If their preaching is to be believed, these 'enlightened' dissenters are almost the complete opposite of Axis orthodoxy! They've been expounding upon the ideals of forgiveness, love and healing, and are all-around much more agreeable. They are even friendly towards our church, instead of spouting that nonsense about Great Eris being a dark goddess. I have heard of a few even reaching out for help, although that may simply be a sign of desperation, rather than an indication of good intentions." He couldn't help but laugh at the idea, not that true followers of Eris would fail to help even their long-time rivals, if it came to it, but the idea that a split in a group as disagreeable as the Axis Cult could actually result in a less fanatical sect! His face soon turned grim again however, when he spoke of the backlash. "It seems the traditionalists of the order have taken quite poorly to these new ideas however. Both sides are equally zealous, but the orthodoxy within the cult have been trying to repress this heresy with increasing ferocity, striking out against anything even remotely heretical. Of course, it's not like the reformists are taking that lying down either. There's a real danger that it may soon lead to bloodshed." His sorrow was clear in his voice, as he explained. While not brothers and sisters in faith, the Axis Cult were still on the side of light, against the Demon King and the thought of the suffering such a divide would cause, was enough to pain all but the hardest heart.
"That's awful... But, what would that have to do with Aqua specifically?" Luna asked in confusion, cocking her head. "The Axis Cult has never been very popular within Axel and in a group as small as them, the fighting doesn't seem likely to spread here?"
Smiling knowingly, Father Royce leaned forward. "Tell me Luna, have you not noticed a rather 'tempestuous' mood in your young friend as of late?"
Luna nodded. "You mean how bipolar she's been? Of course I have. I'd have had to have buried my head in the sand to have missed it. I had no idea she was under this kind of stress… Are you suggesting I commute her punishment somewhat? That's generous of you, Father, but I'm afraid that's an internal guild matter-"
Father Royce shook his head, waving a finger. "Ah, I thought as much. Luna dear, you are thinking too much of the temporal, rather than the spiritual. Aqua is not just a Cleric or regular Priestess - she is an Arch-Priestess. Most simply view it as an advanced class, much like how a Mage may become a Sorcerer, or Arch-Mage, but speaking as an Arch-Priest of Eris myself, it is much more than that. All holy classes feel the will of their deity, but her connection to her namesake goddess goes much deeper than that of a regular follower or priest. Indeed, while she may not hold a position of authority within the cult, I would go so far as to say that her connection to the Goddess Aqua, surpasses even my own ties to Eris! The turmoil within their order is no mere happenstance and it is causing much the same within her. Until this reformation is settled, I am afraid she'll continue to have such mood swings as she experiences the pull to one side or the other, even if she doesn't fully understand it yet, due to her relative isolation here in Axel. I wouldn't be surprised to learn if she's already having visions and struggling to comprehend them."
Luna covered her mouth, eyes wide in horror at the revelation. It explained so much though, with how some days Aqua would be almost too nice, only to turn into a raging bitch at the slightest provocation. "Eris preserve us..! And she's suffering all that in silence? What can I do to help?" she asked immediately, unwilling to lose her friend to such a burden without even trying!
Royce reached out and patted her hand, proud of his 'daughter.' "Simply be there for her, my child. She is going through a difficult time right now and will need all the help she can get. Be understanding, but not too indulgent. I know you can offer her both and she will have need of a rock to cling to in these stormy seas. I would advise against speaking of this to her directly however. Such turmoil is a deeply personal affair and she may see explicit intervention from someone outside the cult as an attempt to step between her and her goddess."
Kazuma slunk away from the door, his head spinning, as the two friends turned their conversation to more lighthearted topics. Of course, what he knew and neither Luna, nor Royce did, was that Aqua's 'connection' to the goddess was even stronger than they believed! She wasn't just an Arch-Priestess, she was the goddess herself! He didn't know just what was causing such chaos among her weird cultists, but it sounded bad. With Aqua in the state she was however, he'd have to think carefully about how best to approach the topic with her.
-Ko-No-Su-Ba!-
The next few days brought Kazuma no answers and only further frustration, as a certain petite Thief approached the mission desk. "Heya Kazuma, got a minute?"
Kazuma looked up, relieved to see one of the guild's saner adventurers. Chris was short, slim and unquestionably pretty, despite a scar across her cheek and jaw. She wore her silvery hair short, just brushing her blue scarf and short green cape. She left much of her midriff bare between her leather chestplate and shorts, following the fashion of most female Thieves, but it did little to make her appear less boyish. Honestly, ever since he'd been working the desk, she'd been professional and reliable, which as far as Kazuma was concerned, made her good company.
"Oh, hey Chris. Need another mission?" he asked. "Not sure we've got many item-retrieval ones up at the moment." He paused, noticing the notorious beast known as Darkness standing behind Chris and looking embarrassed. "Ah, one for both of you, or are you heading out as a duo?" The new rules still allowed it, provided they were competent enough and the mission wasn't specified as dangerous enough to require a full group.
"Not exactly? See, Darkness here has been having a bit of an issue finding a party and I was hoping you could help her?" Chris asked with an awkward smile, the crusader behind her looking away in shame.
"She's a decently high level Crusader, it can't be that hard for her to find a party, can it?" Kazuma blinked, completely confused. He'd always had the impression she was a bit 'odd,' to say the least, but surely adventurers were used to 'odd,' right?
"She's tried. And tried. And tried. Every time, after just a single mission, they ... Well, she's kind of un-invited. Now word's starting to get around, so we were hoping you could just… Assign her a group, maybe?" Kazuma's eyes narrowed in suspicion. Chris was hiding something, he was certain of it. That alone was unusual for her, but what it was, he wasn't entirely sure just yet.
"Uh-huh. HEY FELDART! Get your ugly, crusty, old ass over here! I got a job for you!" Kazuma shouted, trying to grab the seasoned Pugilist's attention. When in doubt, just find out for yourself!
"I'm comin, I'm comin, keep your panties on, ya desk jockey" came the grizzled voice of Feldart, from somewhere near the bar. He stood and scratched, lumbering over like a shambling old bear. "Need to knock the rust off anyway. Whatcha got for me?"
"Megumin hasn't gotten to go on a mission since 'the incident,' Darkness needs an on-site evaluation, and considering my ass is starting to wear a groove in this chair, I was going to make it my first outing. Think you'd be up for escorting three problem children to do a simple slime hunt?" Kazuma asked, holding out the bounty for slime cores. It was a repeating mission that was basically always available since the cores were a key component to many potions and slimes literally only needed somewhere cool and damp to reproduce.
"That's all? Yeah, I think I can do that. Go get yourself kitted and we can go once somebody covers the desk. I'll go get Luna for you." Feldart offered, being one of the few that could just do that despite Luna's new station. Running out of fucks to give about two-dozen scars ago, came with perks among adventurers.
-Ko-No-Su-Ba!-
Darkness and Megumin were effectively on cloud nine, the two of them ecstatic to be back out in the field. Megumin had been approved to, at Feldart's discretion, cast offensive magic and was already pre-planning which chant to use. The sole upside to helping out Kazuma with the interminably dull work in the guild, was that she had plenty of time to come up with new incantations. Darkness meanwhile, could barely hold herself together as she salivated over the idea of the slimes' disgusting, gooey bodies destroying her armor, sliding along her skin and doing Eris-only-knows what else - there was a surprising amount of illicit material to draw from, on that particular subject.
Even Kazuma was in high spirits, having pillaged the back rooms for a decent set of gear and finally feeling like he was actually getting to be the hero he wanted to be. While his class didn't offer him any combat abilities, Feldart had judged him competent enough to not risk immediately dying the moment he set foot outside the city walls. Compared to most merchants, his combat skills had to be in the top ten percent, right? He'd wanted to pick a full set of steel plates to cover every inch of him and make him look like a knight in shining armor, but not only had it been shockingly heavy and hard to move in, even after all his training, but Feldart pointed out that if it got messed up, it'd be added to his debts. Besides, why armor up like a vanguard, when they already had Darkness? Instead, he had picked out a thick jacket, which he'd had his doubts about, until Feldart remarked that eight to twelve layers of cloth could actually stop most minor wounds and if he took something head-on, no armor he could still move in would help anyway.
He'd opted to pick up a somewhat chunky-looking rapier known as a side-sword as his weapon, the relatively light blade versatile enough that he'd be able to make use of it and allow him a simple buckler on his left arm. It was light gear and wasn't exactly ideal for a slime hunt, but he wasn't a combat class anyway and this way, if things went sideways, he'd be able to assist at least.
Feldart clapped his hands at the end of their march, catching the attention of his 'sprouts,' just outside the hollow where the guild's scouts had reported a cluster of slimes. "Alright, listen up, kids, it's strategy time. Megumin, do you have any offensive spells besides Explosion? Darkness and Kazuma, how do you intend to fight the slimes?" He asked, wanting to hear if they had any plan at all, before eviscerating them.
Megumin shook her head, pouting slightly. "No. I haven't had a mission since I was forbidden from casting offensive magic, so I haven't gotten any skill points with which to buy a new skill," she sulked. That in turn had created a vicious cycle, as she was so over-specialized into blowing things up, that without her offensive magic, no-one had a use for her. Honestly, at this point, she was desperate to do something, even if it wasn't her true calling of unleashing total armageddon in a single, unstoppable blast.
Darkness simply looked confused for a moment before motioning to the weapon at her side. "Uhm… I was going to hit them with my sword?" Honestly, what else was there to fighting? It wasn't like her job was to do any more than stand between her party and the brutish, vicious fiends waiting to brutalize and violate them.
Kazuma could only roll his eyes, having expected better of two advanced classes. "Slimes are slow, so since we lack ranged options, we'll be darting in and out of range of them, attempting to stab their core so that they destabilize for collection. Not like the contract specified they needed them in one piece. Stabbing a slime's usually pretty pointless, but if you can get the core, it's a sure thing. Slashing at them just means they'll heal right back up and bludgeons hardly do anything, unless you're strong enough to just splash them everywhere."
Feldart nodded in pride at his pupil, who had clearly done his homework. "That's what I wanted to hear! Hear that, girls? We could be here all day without the right approach, or worse, end up making a dumb mistake and having to cawl back home covered in slime guts. Every five minutes of prep saves you an hour of effort!" He sighed, realizing he'd slipped into 'lecture mode' again. He was turning into the same lecturing old man his father had been. "Anyway, Kazuma's got the right idea, under normal circumstances, but we've got you, Crusader. With a defense stat like the one I saw on your guild card, you can likely tank these beasties until the cows come home, so there's a simpler approach. Just reach right in and pluck the core out of their bodies to kill it" he snapped his fingers for effect. "Don't take your time and a tough girl like you won't even feel it!."
Turning to Megumin, he had a harder time thinking of how she could be useful before it hit him. "You can change the height and shape of your barriers, right? Make a low wall around an individual slime, just tall enough it can't ooze up her legs, but that Darkness here can reach in and grab the core. Should make it a piece of cake for the lot of us and you can teleport us home. Kazuma, you'll bel running interference in the meantime, picking off what you can and keeping them away from Megumin. Any questions?"
The trio could only look at the old adventurer with newfound respect, understanding now how he'd made it to such a ripe old age in one of the most dangerous professions there is. He left nothing to risk if he could help it. Darkness was mildly disappointed at that, honestly. With such a simple and idiot-proof plan, she'd have next to no chance of being ravaged by the monsters.
Entering the shaded and slightly muddy hollow, Feldart leaned up against a tree, motioning for the trio to get on with it. He was mostly here to observe and besides, the level difference was great enough that if he got involved, there'd be no point to any of them lifting a finger.
Megumin did exactly as she'd been instructed, encircling the nearest slime with her barrier and holding it steady, while Kazuma drew his sword and started probing at the ones nearest the bored-looking mage, carefully keeping his footing on the slick mixture of grass, dead leaves and ooze. Darkness walked up to the captive, her energy and excitement drained as she realized this wasn't going to be how she'd imagined at all. Removing her gauntlet, she sighed and plunged her hand inside of the slime.
It felt disgusting, neither solid enough to resemble organ meat, or liquid enough to simply be filthy water. It clung to her skin and undershirt and just as her fingers nudged against the core, she felt her skin heat up, just beginning to burn uncomfortably. That was when her darkness showed its ugly face. She tried to disguise it as a cry of pain, but everyone present could identify a moan of pleasure. Digging her arm even deeper into the slime as she let the burning of the digestive blob give her exactly what she needed. It would be better if she could feel it searing all across her vulnerable body, seeping past armor and clothes, but she'd take what she was given. "Oh my, it's trying to digest my arm! Ah,it hurts so bad!" her words and the way she said it didn't match at all, the excitement in her voice sounding like she was close to having a climax of all things.
Feldart and Kazuma exchanged a shocked look, the former's face as slack as the latter's was stiff, now understanding the problem with her. The girl wasn't bad at her job, if anything she enjoyed it too much! Darkness was a total nympho masochist! She looked like she was about to pleasure herself right then and there off the pain of a damned slime of all things! "Darkness, you- You grab that damned core and take your hand out this instant, or I am revoking all of your mission rights until you're old and grey!" Feldart bellowed at her, faceplaming and leaning off of the tree, ready to physically pull her away if necessary.
Darkness let out a pitiful whine before doing as told, retracting her hand with a core the size of a tangerine clasped in it. The slime made a small, sad 'pop,' the loss of its heart effectively destroying the monster as Megumin dropped the barrier, letting its fluid body puddle out, no longer held in one piece.
"Alright, Darkness, sit your ass over here - you're in Time Out. Megumin and Kazuma: Same plan, but Kazuma will be stabbing instead of grabbing. Get to it." Feldart instructed, letting them finish off four more just so that they could meet the minimum requested amount for the bounty. Megumin's fingers itched to just finish the whole cluster in one go, wishing to do more, but not wanting to test the patience of the man that could ban her from ever having a mission again. Instead she just contented herself with making her barrier incantations as needlessly over-the-top as possible. It wasn't the same.
-Ko-No-Su-Ba!-
Kazuma was seated with Feldart, the two of them drinking in silence, while they tried to figure out what to do with her.
Feldart broke the awkwardness first, scratching his chin as he avoided Kazuma's eyes. "I say we just dismiss her as an adventurer. I don't care if she likes it, she's gonna get herself killed,or worse, get others killed."
Kazuma couldn't help but agree on a certain level, but it honestly irked him to just write someone off who clearly had potential. She just needed to realize that there was a correct time and place for horniness, and it wasn't when you were fighting monsters. "Look, I'm not saying you're totally wrong, but it feels like such a waste to just throw her out with the trash. As it is, she is the single best tank the guild has at her level, at least on paper. We just need a way to keep her focused."
Kazuma and Feldart fell back into silence, both nursing their drinks. Eventually, Kazuma had a wild, desperate idea. "Hey… You think if we managed to get her satisfied, she'd be able to behave?"
"You mean just dick the crazy out of her? I mean, yes? Maybe? But what kind of lunatic would be able to keep up with that level of crazy? In case you forgot, she's already been thrown out of a bunch of parties with men who couldn't." Feldart asked, racking his brain for an adventurer desperate or horny enough that they could throw at the problem. It wasn't as if Darkness didn't attract her share of admirers at first glance - an amazonian blonde with a body like that, it'd be stranger if she didn't. It was just, with her tastes leaning that way…
Kazuma considered for a moment, then solemnly reached into his pocket, pulling out a voucher for a certain cafe. He hadn't returned since his and Aqua visit, but Marigold had slipped him the voucher as a thanks for giving them some legitimacy and protecting Missy, the small succubus he'd help escape. "There is only one chance. They're the sex experts, after all. If anyone has even a chance to satiate her over-horniness, it would be them."
"Hmm… You know, that's just insane enough that it could work. Of course, it could also backfire spectacularly if she doesn't give it a shot" Feldart explained, tapping the voucher to emphasize the point.
"That's a risk we're going to have to take," Kazuma nodded gravely, folding his arms.
"Don't you dare!" came a shout from near the bar. Dust had somehow heard them, likely either because the talk of girls had summoned him or he'd been hoping to wheedle some booze out of Kazuma. "Those girls are a treasure amongst us men of Axel, preserved by effort and sacrifice for years! I'll be damned before I let you destroy it by taking a woman there!" Dust reached for the voucher, intending to take it for himself, only to be stopped by Kazuma's hand closing around his wrist.
"Dust, think about what you're saying for a moment. This isn't going to ruin anything. Darkness is a bigger pervert than most guys here. She'd be shooting herself in the foot if she snitched on us" Kazuma explained, repocketing the voucher even as Dust lunged at him. If he ever found out how close Aqua had come to reducing the entire cafe to ashes, there was no way of telling if Dust would die of a heart attack, or just kill him.
"That isn't a risk I am willing to take!" Dust exclaimed, clenching his fists. "The only way you're leaving this hall with that voucher is over my dead body, Kazuma!" Dust thrust a finger out at his friend, still sprawled out over the table.
"Feel free to try, but I won't hold back." Kazuma stood and raised his fists, a gleam in his eye and ready to fight Dust if it came to it. "I do this for the good of the guild."
"Good of the guild? You'll doom the guild if you do this!" Dust responded, regaining his feet and squaring up for battle, swinging heavily at the Merchant.
Kazuma ducked and leaned in, uppercutting the adventurer in the gut as he overextended. "I've trained with Feldart almost every gods-forsaken day for two months. You think those sloppy ass punches are ever going to hit me?" Kazuma challenged, throwing a hook of his own, only for Dust to catch it.
As their shit talking and brawl escalated, Feldart sat back and enjoyed the show, sipping on his Ale. "Alright, who's got odds against Kazuma?" He shouted, pulling a small notepad from his vest, with a stick of charcoal. He might as well make some drinking money on his student wiping the floor with Dust. Maybe it would motivate the lecher to actually put some training in instead of just boozing around. Numbers and fistfuls of Eris were quickly pushed his way as bets were placed. He could only smile as many people made the mistake of betting on Dust, assuming he had an insurmountable advantage of a combat class, unlike Kazuma.
"You're a merchant, I'd have to hang up my sword and quit adventuring if I lost to you!" Dust shouted, grabbing a mug and throwing it at Kazuma's head, before grabbing a bench and swinging it underarm.
Kazuma blocked the beer mug with his forearm, stepping forward and getting inside of Dust's reach. Since Dust was taller, this was the best thing he could do, his shorter arms allowing him to hammer Dust with his full strength while Dust couldn't leverage his reach.
The slog lasted for ten, long, loud minutes, catching the attention of the whole hall. The adventurers had made a ring around them, keeping either from running away or finding a weapon as their fight continued on. By the time they were done, both were bloodied and bruised. Kazuma was standing a bit straighter as Dust was doubled over, panting heavily as he tried to catch his breath. Kazuma was used to taking a beating from Feldart, compared to that, Dust was nothing.
Kazuma spat out a glob of blood, gently using his tongue to probe one of his teeth that had grown loose from the beating. "Are we done here? You're barely able to stand on your feet, let alone continue fighting."
Dust didn't answer, swaying on his feet and raising his fists again, barely conscious, but unwilling to give up. "I can't lose. I will defend the girls of the cafe," he managed to slur out, "For the happiness of all the men of Axel..!" He slumped, one knee buckling even as he tried to take another step, falling against his foe's shoulder.
Kazuma shook his head, patting the man's back in appreciation of his resolve. "It's over, man. I promise, I'll protect that happiness of yours," he murmured, before raising his voice. "Somebody drag him to the infirmary and get Aqua out here." Kazuma slumped down into a chair, taking a moment to catch his breath as the onlookers both cheered their winnings, or exclaimed in cheated disbelief.
Now for the real fun: Getting Darkness to that cafe.
-Ko-No-Su-Ba!-
Kazuma had managed to convince Darkness to wear a burlap sack and allow herself to be led along far too easily. He had just said he needed to take her somewhere secret and she'd agreed instantly. The harder part had been convincing her that the collar and leash she'd been about to fetch were not necessary.
While they attracted more than a few curious gazes, the people of Axel generally knew to not worry about what adventurers are up to, knowing that adventurers themselves tended toward the eccentric and whatever it was, they were happier just not knowing. Once the coast was clear, Kazuma dragged Darkness into the alleyway, pulling her roughly behind him (much to her approval), right into the cafe.
The hostess was confused to see Kazuma walk through the door so soon after the whole Aqua debacle, having quite reasonably assumed he'd have kept away longer, if only for his own safety. Then she noticed his 'guest' and blinked, pointing a questioning finger. "Um, Kazuma?" she asked, curious as to who was with him and clearly female. "I thought you were together with Aqua? Are you sure this is a good idea?"
Kazuma sighed, not terribly surprised at the reaction. "I am and trust me, I know the stakes in coming here like this. This is Darkness and For lack of a better term, this girl is dangerously horny to the point of it impacting her work. You girls were the only ones I could think of to work your magic with her. It's getting in the way of her missions and is actively dangerous with how much she's letting her needs distract her." He whipped off the burlap sack, hopeful that the rope he had tied around her wrists (on her insistence) would hold if she freaked out.
Darkness had a blissful look on her eyes, having been enjoying just how roughly she'd been treated by the brute, Kazuma. Tying her hands with rough rope that bit into her skin so wonderfully, then forcing that foul-smelling sack over her head, only to drag her off to some unknown area where he could ravish her body to his heart's content-! Once she could see the succubi however, that all changed in a heartbeat. Letting out a grunt of surprise and effort, she flexed her arms, snapping the ropes almost as if they weren't there at all and grabbing for where her sword usually hung at her hip. "Succubi?! Kazuma, you brought me to a coven of succubi?!" Kazuma abusing her was one thing, but soul-sucking demons?! Certainly the idea had a thrilling appeal, but even she had her limits-! Probably.
Kazuma grabbed Darkness's ear, pulling as hard as he could. "Oi, perverted Crusader. Behave yourself."
Darkness let out a pleased moan as his cruel fingers pulled her down to his level and hopefully even lower to taste the filthy floor under his boot. "Ahn~! But Kazuma, they're demons!"
One of the more enterprising girls had apparently recognized Kazuma too and immediately darted upstairs, as while he was subduing Darkness, Marigold approached the duo, an unamused frown on her face and her customary sashay in her step. "Kazuma, Kazuma, Kazuma, another girl? My, my, I do have to wonder what our goddess would have to say about that, hm? Do you make a hobby of bringing trouble to the doors of respectable business-ladies?"
"Yes, this is Kazuma- Whoa, hold on! This has nothing to do with anything like that! I need your expertise!" he exclaimed, forming an X with his arms and wanting to nip that line of conversation in the bud immediately.
Letting out a light chuckle, Marigold lit up a cigarette, having a feeling she'd need it. The habit had re-asserted itself the moment she got back to her room after signing what passed for her soul away to Aqua. "Alright then, honey, what is this about then?"
Kazuma motioned towards Darkness, thankful he'd forced her to leave her sword back at home. "This useless Crusader is the problem. She's literally too horny to function. If I leave her here with you, do you think you can help her focus on her missions?" he asked shortly, desperate for this plan to work, because frankly if it didn't, he was out of ideas.
Marigold looked Darkness up and down and smirked, exhaling a plume of scented smoke as she raised an eyebrow. "Oh my. Honey, you're a hard 'M' type, aren't you? I haven't seen one with it bottled up as bad as you in years. I think we might be able to help you out, Kazuma, with our usual 'fee' of course." Her smile broadened and she reached out, caressing Darkness's cheek, before sliding her fingers into the blonde Crusader's ponytail and gripping tight. "Come Dearie, take a seat with me over here and let's talk about how to make all your deprived dreams come true."
-Ko-No-Su-Ba!-
That night, Darkness had returned to her father's estate to sleep. She had promised her father she would come home tonight, so she'd followed through, even with her impending visitor. She'd done as instructed though and left her window unlocked for her to come in, before slipping under her sheets and trembling with anticipation. She'd had some pretty vivid dreams of her fantasies in the past, but that succubus with the strong fingers had made one hell of a persuasive sales pitch.
A slender figure flitted through the night, landing lightly on the roof of the Dustiness mansion and pausing to catch her breath. Missy, the same succubus that had 'helped' Kazuma and Aqua had been given the assignment to help Darkness out. Marigold had said she'd been chosen because she 'knew her friends,' but that honestly sounded like the biggest load of crap excuse she'd ever heard. It was obvious Marigold was still mad and had sent her on the hour-long flight to the Dustiness estate for this dream trip, as a way to remind her of that fact. Or maybe it was a chance to show she could handle a job without bringing an angry goddess back with her. Either way, her wings were killing her.
Beyond the long flight, the other major issue was just how many windows this place had! She had to check five different windows (three of which were for the same room), before she even found her client! Seriously, who needed more than one window per bedroom? This was excessive! Eventually, she managed to find the room though, checking she had the right girl, before slipping in with ease (heh).
Letting out a sigh of exhaustion, she sat down on the edge of Darkness's four-poster-bed, taking a load off while she started dream tampering. She had been told to go all out for this one. Marigold had made it clear that the girl's 'issues' would mean she needed to make her sick of the very idea of sex even before she was done. The idea was to leave the client with such a high that there was simply no need to indulge in her daydreams, without going so far as to just reduce her brain to mush. Then she'd been told she might need to do this weekly. Sure. No pressure.
This girl had some pretty extreme requests too. Missy was still a neophyte in many ways and what she was being asked to weave both repulsed and fascinated her, strictly in a, "Wow, people can get off to that?" sense. She'd heard some of the other girls talking about having to play the part of big burly men dominating clients in the form of small girls, but this was another level. Still, at least she'd have her own 'war stories' to tell, soon enough! Unfortunately for Missy, her luck was still holding strong. So lost was she in her work, that she didn't hear movement outside the room until it was too late.
"Lalatina, are you still awake, dear? Did you hear something outside? I could have sworn I saw something large fly outside my-" Lord Dustiness froze in the doorway, the dim light of the lamps in the corridor casting dark shadows over Missy's form, looming over the noble's comatose daughter. For a half-second, both parties processed just what they were seeing, before Ignis's fatherly instincts kicked in. "SUCCUBUS?! Get away from my daughter, you bitch!" Ignis had seen an outline of Missy flit across the window, while she was looking for the correct room and had thought at first, it might be some kind of giant bat on the prowl. The creatures had been known to occasionally carry off livestock or children and though they were probably safe inside the mansion, concern for his daughter had driven him to check on her. Seeing the nightmare looming over his defenseless girl, he was now very glad he had!
"NOT AGAIN! I am just doing my damn job!" Missy wailed, leaping from the bed to avoid the hurled flower vase that Lord Dustiness had immediately seized as an improvised weapon. Unfortunately, her escape put her client's enormous four-poster bed between her and the window, meaning all she could do was cower in the corner, crossing her arms over her head to protect herself.
Naturally, the chaos woke Darkness, tearing her from her slumber just as her dream was getting to the really good part with the ogre king and his bodyguards. Her [Vigilance] skill immediately kicked in, clearing any traces of drowsiness from her body, letting her take in the situation at once. She leapt from her bed at once, tearing the covers off and throwing herself between her father and the petite girl in the corner, her arms spread wide."Father, stop! Wait! She's telling the truth! I… I hired her help."
"What? Lalatina, what are you saying?! Clearly, she has you under some spell! I'll dispatch the demon and free you myself" he threatened, brandishing a heavy, brass candlestick as his only weapon, but looking intimidating as if he were holding a warmace. The fact that his daughter was panting heavily and very red in the face, didn't exactly help matters.
Missy scurried over the bed, diving under the covers for the first hint of protection she could find, her cute little butt sticking out as she began crying at her repeated misfortunes. Why couldn't just one job go without a disaster?! Darkness shook her head, holding out her hand. "Father, she isn't controlling me. Pinch my hand and see yourself - break a finger if you have to! You know most enchantments are broken by pain."
Lord Dustiness was about to do just that (well, a pinch maybe, he'd never dream of breaking Lalatina's delicate fingers), but a slip of paper the fiend had dropped in her scramble for the blankets, floated down between them, attracting his attention. It had Lalatina's name, address, and other more questionable information on it. He bent and picked it up suspiciously. A demonic contract perhaps? It was in his daughter's handwriting too-! He started to read it, reaching the part that described her desired dreams. His eyes almost bulged out of his head, as he grew pale and the room span at the idea of his precious daughter being subjected to any such things, much less requesting them! He looked up, only to see Lalatina avoiding his gaze, her face all but glowing red, ashamed that he'd found out in such a way. Even for someone who thrived on being humiliated, to have her father find out like this was like a punch to the gut - and not the pleasant kind.
Ignis took a deep breath, realizing that this might be slightly more complicated than he'd first thought. "My study. Now. And bring that… Thing with you.We are going to have a long, in-depth talk about how all of… This came about."
