AN: Okay, so this story is dedicated to Katie as a birthday present for all her hard work red-penning the chapters I send her, for being willing to bounce ideas around and also for occasionally being that partner in crime that encourages ideas that probably should not be encouraged. Knowing that Katie likes happy, fluffy stories with a N/E ending I truly did intend for this to be just that. As often happens, the characters had other ideas. I still plan on a happy N/E ending it just isn't turning out as fluffy as I wanted. Nor is it turning out to be the one-shot I was trying for. I do still hope to wrap this up in under ten chapters.
Happy Birthday, Katie. I hope you enjoy the story. (I will apologize no for the cliffhangar at the end of chapter 1 but it felt like a good place to stop once it became apparent this wasn't going to be a one-shot).
Disclaimer: Places and characters of WCTH are the property of Hallmark Channel.
The smoke continued to rise above the tree tops from the direction of the oil derricks. Elizabeth couldn't take her eyes off of it. She wasn't the only one. Despite the crowd that had gathered on the street of Hope Valley, there was an eerie quiet lingering now. Even the earlier sounds of crying had subsided as people stood staring at the smoke and waiting for word about what had happened. Had anyone been hurt in the initial explosion they had heard? Had any who had gone to help now been injured?
"Maybe I should go see if I can help?"
Jesse's comment brought Elizabeth out of her own thoughts. She became aware of the older woman who still clung to her arm. As a mother herself, Elizabeth could understand Helen Bouchard's distress - even if her own concern was more for a certain man in red serge. Perhaps Lucas wasn't even at the site where the danger was. Not that she offered those empty words to the woman standing beside her. Platitudes were not what one wanted to hear in moments like these.
"Bill, wanted the rest of us to stay put for now," Kevin stated. "He said he would send for more help when and if it was needed."
The sound of a car behind them caught people's attention. Folks parted to let Lee drive his automobile slowly through the path created. Carson was in the front seat next to the mill owner while Faith was in the back seat. Elizabeth wasn't sure if it comforted her that their doctors were poised to offer their services or worried her more. She hoped no one was in need of Carson and Faith. She wanted everyone to be all right.
"Let's at least get some wagons ready to go up there in case they are needed when the others have the situation under control," Jesse suggested.
There were murmurs of consent at that suggestion as people moved to do just that. Even if Helen was not clutching her arm, Elizabeth knew she wouldn't be able to move. She felt frozen as she watched the smoke slowly rise into the sky. Seeing that continuous rising cloud abate would mean things were under control.
Elizabeth felt like time was passing slowly. As she watched the steady rise of smoke, the scene by the log a few days ago replayed in her mind. The memory was just as fresh now as it was that night when she had recorded it in her journal. She could hear Nathan's enthusiasm as he told her about the land he was thinking about buying from Bill. He had tried to cover himself with adding "me and Allie" but Elizabeth had known that she and Jack were a part of those dreams he described.
Part of her wanted to be. Part of her wanted to be making those dreams with him. To plan a house on that land and maybe add another child to the mix.
But she had done that with Jack. She could still remember the day Jack had showed her the land he had bought. He had been so proud and so full of dreams. He had even bought the lumber from Lee, a load being delivered before Jack had left for the Northern Territories. She had asked Lee to remove that load from the land as it was only a painful reminder of those dreams. Then Jack had returned. Their wedding had been a step toward those dreams but then his safe training mission had taken him from her.
Just remembering those events had brought pain. It was a feeling that Elizabeth had no desire to repeat. It was easier not to even start making those dreams with Nathan.
"I can't lose you like I lost Jack."
Even as she had said those words, Elizabeth knew that she had fallen in love with Nathan. Perhaps it had started with simply loving Allie. Wanting to give that girl a bit of the mother figure that she was missing in her life. However, even by that first Christmas, it had gone further than that. It wasn't for the 'friends' he was leaving behind that she had not wanted Nathan to leave.
She hadn't wanted him to leave her.
Yet when he had professed his love to her, she had said she couldn't and had run away herself. The memory of a Mountie coming to tell her that Jack was gone had come to the forefront again. She had felt like she couldn't go through that again, even though she had meant what she told Clara in that she would love Jack again even if she had known how it would end. She would have. She had loved Jack.
She loved Nathan. The thought of him not being in her life was unthinkable. Yet, it wasn't fair to Nathan to want him in her life and yet be unable to return the feelings which he so clearly had for her. Especially now that he had professed his love for her.
For all Lucas' charms, things that money could buy, and flattering words, he had not come close to the sincerity that had fueled those words from Nathan.
Though Nathan had not been on the site when that explosion had happened, that fire meant that there would still be danger when he arrived. She may have stopped Helen from running toward danger but she knew she would never be able to stop Nathan. Just like she had never been able to stop Jack.
Taking her eyes from the smoke, Elizabeth saw the faces of those gathered with her. There was worry on every one of them. Clara stood pressed up against Jesse as she clung to his arm. Though she was holding him now, Elizabeth knew that when the situation was under control, Clara would let Jesse go to do what he could to help. Helping was what one did for their neighbors and community.
Nathan could quit the Mounties, and the dangers would still be there. Losing someone was a fear they were faced with every day. She had encouraged Clara to fight that fear and marry Jesse. She did not regret giving the young woman that advice.
Though perhaps she needed to stop being a hypocrite and fight that fear herself. She had told Rosemary that she had chosen not to be with Nathan but that she didn't think that it meant she had chosen to be with Lucas. She knew now that both those statements were wrong. Fear was keeping her from Nathan despite the fact that her heart had already chosen him.
Looking back to the horizon, Elizabeth saw that the smoke didn't appear as steady. Murmurs ran through the crowd around her. As it continued to abate, Lee started his automobile and headed in the direction of the oil derricks. The vehicle's departure had the other men left in town climbing into the three wagons that had been gathered.
Feeling Helen's tight hold on her loosen, Elizabeth glanced toward the woman. Worried that the older woman had been fainting, Elizabeth was glad to see her still standing. However, Elizabeth recognized the look of desperation in her eyes. The look that clearly said you needed to see with your own eyes that someone you loved was okay.
"Perhaps we should wait?" Elizabeth suggested, grasping Helen's arm to stop her. She didn't think a hysterical mother was what any of the men up there needed to deal with.
"No," Helen said. "I need to know."
So do I, Elizabeth thought, though her concern was for a different man. With a nod, she led Helen toward the wagon that Jesse was in the back of. Kevin was up front, the reigns in his hands as he waited for everyone to get settled.
"Jesse, we want to come with you," Elizabeth said.
For a brief second Elizabeth thought Jesse would argue, but the look quickly melted to understanding and he instead climbed back down to help first Helen and then Elizabeth into the back of the wagon.
Except for the rattle of the wagon as its wheels rolled over the rough dirt road, the ride up to the site was silent. No one spoke. No words of even speculation. Elizabeth was sure that those who had been in town at the time of the mining accident were probably thinking of that time. Would there be casualties again?
Their wagon was the last to reach the site. As Kevin brought it to a stop, he called out. "What can we do to help?"
"I can use some help roping off the area around the derrick," a voice answered. Elizabeth's heart skipped a beat at that voice. Nathan was all right. As her eyes sought him out, she found him away from the rest of the activity where the new arrivals were helping with those who were injured. "I don't want people too close to the derrick now that the fire is out until I can properly investigate."
"You think I purposely set my own derrick on fire?" Lucas called out even as Jesse and the other men scrambled from the wagon to carry out the request.
The response made Elizabeth look from Nathan to Lucas. The man was sitting on the ground near the three-sided building that provided shelter to those working the site. Helen was kneeling next to her son who held a cloth to the side of his head. Along with that, his face was pale, and his usual pristine clothes were dirty and rumpled. As both Faith and Carson were checking on others, Elizabeth figured his injuries were not too serious. Not to mention, he was feeling well enough to accuse Nathan of thinking something that had not been said.
"He never said that!"
The words were out of her mouth before Elizabeth realized she was speaking. She felt her cheeks warm as people look toward her but she didn't want to take them back. She had defended Lucas to people before, including Nathan, but never once has she outright defended Nathan when Lucas had tried to make him look bad.
Why was that?
Maybe because Elizabeth had known that no one would believe what Lucas had been implying about Nathan. Their Mountie had quickly won the admiration and respect of the town once they had seen her step onto the street with him. Lucas, like Henry, people tended to look at with mistrust while Elizabeth always tried to see the good in people.
"No, but it could be implied. He wouldn't want to investigate if he thought it was merely an accident. However, if I purposely wanted to cause an oil rig fire do you really think I would be stupid enough to be around when it happened. Or that I would stay and help put it out."
"One might think you are protesting a bit too much there, Bouchard," Bill said, narrowed eyes focused on the saloon owner.
Lucas opened his mouth to respond but Nathan's loud but controlled voice put a stop to it.
"That is enough," the Mountie said, his gaze sweeping over everyone. "Right now, this is an investigation into an accident that lead to injuries to several townspeople. It is my duty to investigate into what led to that accident. No one is accusing anyone of anything at this time. Is that understood?"
Some of the men murmured their consent. Elizabeth noticed that Bill and Lucas continued to glare at one another for a few moments before finally looking away. Carson asked for Bill's assistance in getting Ned to his feet.
Elizabeth, still standing near the back end of the wagon, went back to watching Nathan who had gone back to instructing Jesse and a few others about what area he wanted roped off. Though she wanted to run Nathan and be held in his arms, Elizabeth knew she had no right. Not after the way she had treated him that day by the log.
She should have at least stayed and talked, not just run away.
Even knowing that, Elizabeth couldn't take her eyes off of him, even after Nathan had started moving between the oil workers and talking to them. She knew it was all a part of his investigation. On a few occasions, Nathan looked her way, as if he could feel her eyes on him. Though he gave her a curious look, he kept focused on his task.
The first ones to leave the scene was Lee and Carson with Ed Sullivan. The man had seemed to have taken a nasty blow to the head during the initial explosion and though was conscious seemed confused. Eventually, the others started loading into the wagons. Lucas and Helen walked toward where Elizabeth was standing.
"I am fine, Mother. It is just a minor cut that doesn't need stitching."
"But it does need proper cleaning," Faith chimed in. "I better see you in the infirmary when we get back to town."
"I will see he does, Doctor," Helen assured her as Faith turned to check on another man who was being helped into the neighboring wagon, his left shoe absent and the ankle wrapped.
Lucas let his gaze fall to Elizabeth. "May I help you up into the wagon, Mrs. Thornton?" he asked, his tone dripping with honey, just like all the boys from Hamilton that she had thought so insincere.
Elizabeth found herself unconsciously take a step back. She had no intention on letting it appear that she was leaving with Lucas. He had been her easy way to avoid facing what her heart was telling her for too long. It might be too late for her and Nathan after her rejection of a few days ago, but she intended to at least attempt to apologize. Leaving with Lucas, no matter how innocent, would not help her cause.
"I think I am going to walk back to town," she told him.
"It is a long walk, dear," Helen said.
Elizabeth smiled her appreciation at the woman's consideration. "It'll give me time to consider all the changes you have run by me, so far. I figure you'll want to spend some time with Lucas rather than go back to the edits right away."
"You're right," Helen said, looking over at her son. "I do. Perhaps we wait and resume our own meeting until tomorrow? Same time?"
"I'll be there," Elizabeth replied, though she was starting to wonder if there was anything Helen Bouchard actually liked about her book. Did she truly believe in it, or had she agreed to edit it as a favor to her son?
You're overreacting, she silently scolded herself. All books go through edits.
As Lucas and Helen got into the wagon, Elizabeth backed away from the wagon. Soon, all three wagons, full of the oil workers and those who had come to help, were heading back toward town. Turning from their retreat, Elizabeth looked to the fire charred oil derrick. It looked as though it might fall at any moment. She had a feeling that alone was part of the reason that Nathan had wanted the structure roped off.
Nathan and Bill were the only other people still at the site. She watched as the two walked slowly around the area, their eyes taking in everything with the skill of seasoned investigators.
Again, Elizabeth found herself longing to go forward and speak to Nathan. Perhaps as little as a week ago, she would have. Now though, she stood on the edge of the clearing and simply watched, not wanting to distract Nathan from his task.
So intent on the task were the two men, that neither noticed the lone figure that had stayed behind. Elizabeth wasn't sure how long she had watched when Nathan finally moved to where Newton waited patiently for his partner. Unhooking his canteen, Nathan twisted off the lid and took a long drink of it before turning to face Bill who had followed.
"I'm not seeing anything suspicious out here Bill. The workers I did talk to didn't seem to think anything seemed out of the ordinary before the initial explosion either," Nathan told the other man. "I think we are just looking at an accident that could have turned out worse than it did," he finished as he twisted the cap back on the canteen.
"Perhaps," Bill said slowly, the look in his eyes revealing that he was still pondering the situation. "Did you question Bouchard yet?"
Nathan shook his head. "Not yet. Given his response I thought it might be best if I gave him some time to calm down after all that took place. Giving his reaction to my arrival on the scene though, I think he was as much in shock about what happened as everyone else."
"Being in shock doesn't mean he isn't responsible because he's cutting corners or something," Bill mused. "Can you give me a copy of your report to Mountie headquarters about the incident?"
"Of course. Unless Lucas' narrative of what happened is drastically different from the ones I already have I think the report is going to be very dry reading."
"Maybe so. Still, I plan on checking out his other drill sites and looking into the rules and regulations for operations like this. If there is an unsafe work site in my town, I plan on uncovering it."
Nathan nodded. He opened his mouth to say something else but instead Elizabeth realized that he finally realized she was still there.
"Elizabeth, how long have you been there?" Nathan asked. "Did something else happen?"
Elizabeth shook her head. "Not that I am aware of at least," she said, taking a step forward. "I didn't go back with the others."
"Why not?" Bill asked, taking a step forward to put himself partially in front of Nathan. Elizabeth thought it looked like the older man was trying to protect Nathan from her. Perhaps he was. She had seen the two of them talking in the street after all. For all she knew, Nathan had told Bill about the other day.
"I wanted to talk to Nathan but I didn't want to disturb him while he was working," Elizabeth said.
"Maybe you should have stayed and talked instead of riding off the other day," Bill countered.
Elizabeth folded her arms across her mid-section. So Bill was aware of what happened.
"Now, I can't fault you if you do not feel the same thing for Nathan as he does for you, but I can fault you for not having the courage to stay and talk about it like two adults. Especially after the signals you have been giving him. People are not blind you know."
"I am aware of that," Elizabeth said softly.
"Bill, maybe you are being a little too hard on her," Nathan said, his tone calm but void of emotion.
"No, maybe I haven't been hard enough. Maybe what she needs is a little tough love," Bill countered. "I even convinced the force not to fill the post right away, wanting to give her some time to grieve Jack before it felt like someone was replacing him. That wasn't easy Elizabeth, but I did it for you."
"I appreciate that, Bill," Elizabeth said, trying to keep her voice from trembling.
"I am not sure I did you any favors. Maybe it would have been better for you to face that reality sooner. It may not have been Nathan who came here, but it would have been a Mountie. Maybe it would have shown you that as hard as losing someone is, that life continues on without them. It's a reality so many of your neighbors have embraced Elizabeth, but sometimes I do not think that you have really let go of Jack. That isn't healthy for you, nor would it be what Jack would have wanted for you."
"It would have been me."
Nathan's statement came before Elizabeth could respond to Bill's outburst. Though spoken quietly, it caught both of their attention.
"What did you say?" Bill asked, looking over his shoulder at Nathan.
"If the force had sent another Mountie to Hope Valley earlier, it still would have been me. I had requested the posting and was told they were delaying filling it, so Allie and I spent more time at Fort Simpson until they decided it was time to fill the Hope Valley posting."
"Lee said you told him you never served with Jack," Elizabeth stated. "Why would you request his posting?"
"Does this have something to do with why Hargraves seems to have an issue with you? This inquiry feels like it is more than just about the prisoner transfer."
"What inquiry?" Elizabeth felt herself asking, thinking again of the conversation she had seen Nathan and Bill having out the window. Their body language had indicated that the conversation had not been a casual one.
Nathan sighed looking down at the canteen he still held in his hands. Elizabeth could see the distress on his face. Whatever he had been keeping from them, it was clearly taking an emotional toll on him.
"This is not at all how I meant for this to come to light," Nathan said quietly, his eyes focused on the canteen he held.
Half wondering if Bill might still try to block her, Elizabeth moved forward. She closed the distance between herself and Nathan. The only movement from Bill had been to turn as she walked by so that she was facing them as she stood before Nathan. Placing her hands over top of his as he held the canteen, Elizabeth could feel Nathan's hands trembling beneath hers.
"Watching the smoke from the fire here today, I came to the realization that I have been living in fear since losing Jack. My head was telling me that if I ignored my heart that if I kept myself a part from those who were truly in my heart that I would not have to face that loss again. That if all I had was the unconditional love of my son, that my heart couldn't be broken again. However, my heart had already chosen you Nathan. It wasn't Lucas, who would have been here during the initial explosion that I feared could be injured but you. My head might be trying to give into fear, but my heart still wanted me to fight that fear."
Lifting one hand from his, she placed it gently on his chin and encouraged him to look up at her.
"Perhaps I am not the only one with fears I need to fight so that I can truly embrace love," Elizabeth said, as she looked into his eyes. "Perhaps it is time to share the burden you seem to be carrying."
Nathan nodded even as he gave a shuddering breath, clearly trying to fight his emotions. He looked past her and Elizabeth knew he was meeting Bill's gaze.
"Not sure we can get any more private than what we have right now," Bill said from behind her.
Nathan nodded his agreement.
"Let's have a seat on that log," Bill suggested, pointing to a fallen tree not far away.
With another nod, Nathan started in that direction. Not wanting to be too far away from him, Elizabeth followed, staying close to his side.
