Filling In The Blanks
Disclaimer: I don't own Final Fantasy Nine or any of its characters.
A/N: I just got fake nails put on, so I apologize for any mistakes that I don't catch. Also, you all remember where I've placed Terra I hope. Over on the upper left hand side of the map, right next to the Lost Continent – where Shimmering Island should be.
Question: Is it the Lifa tree, or the Iifa tree? Lol I could never figure that out :)
Chapter 34: Absence
Zidane stood against the rising sun. He watched the shadows slowly get shorter and fatter, contrasting to their now long and strung out voids of darkness. The temperature was already rising, and everything looked a little healthier from the rain.
His breath was slow and steady, but it wavered on intake – he was nervous to leave. This was his first mission without highly trained knights – just his group of friends he used to roughhouse with. There was no doubt in his mind that they were good, but the comfort of having people more skilled than him on a team – with different attributes, styles, and aid against an enemy. But now, it was the same skill level, and same style – he wondered, because he couldn't remember completely, how well they would do in battle together.
He was the first to awaken – not even Beatrix or Steiner had rose yet… It was amazing to think that his nerves could make him such an early riser. Then again, the two were probably exhausted. His thoughts fell upon everyone in the resistance, and he realized he wouldn't be seeing them for a long time… By the time the Tantalus crew returned, everyone would be beyond average skill level, a new headquarters would be built, and once again things would probably even be livable and comfortable.
Then his thoughts fell on Dagger. It pained him to know he had to leave without even a good-bye. What if something were to happen. He sighed – there was nothing between them anymore – Dagger would make sure of that. It had been a long while since he'd even last spoken to the girl, and he wondered vaguely if they could ever be friends again.
It surprised him how much he had hurt her. Though he knew she understood why he did it – it didn't help the pain of watching the first person she had let in – the first person that didn't treat her like family, betray her like that.
He shook his head of these thoughts – he didn't need that weighing down his conscience. There was already too much on his mind as it was…
?
Blank awoke at a soft knock on the pole of his tent. He groggily stumbled around, accidentally tipping a few things over, and stepping on his knife, but when he pulled the flap open, he was surprised to see Dagger in front of it, nervous.
"Dagger?" He mumbled softly.
"Can I uh… Come in?" She asked, feeling awkward at the question.
He smirked in her direction and backed up. He was accustomed to sleeping in his armor now – he actually always had been.
She moved inside and held her hands in front of her waist – something she did out of habit when she was guilty.
"What's up?" He questioned, flopping back down on – how she ever wondered he could believe so – a comfortable blanket.
"What do I do about Zidane?" She sighed – knowing that if she didn't bring it up now, she'd never have the chance to talk to him before he left, and it could be a very long time before they got back.
"Well…" He didn't have to think about what she should do much – but he wanted to humor her. "I know what he did was wrong, but… Dagger, my arm or a kiss… You know he didn't mean anything by it – but you know how Zidane is… It tears him apart if he could prevent pain for people and doesn't."
"I know that I am being rather selfish right now…" She began, suddenly feeling uncomfortable and anxious, "but, what about my pain?"
"Maybe it's something he thought he could fix?" Blank didn't have an answer, but he knew one hundred percent that the blonde wouldn't do anything to hurt her intentionally.
She turned and watched the tent waver in the light breeze. Her hand trailed across the pole, her fingers making a wisping noise as she allowed her hand to drop. The silence that engulfed them was a calm one – they weren't fidgeting, proving it was a relaxed quiet.
"Okay…" She said finally, "Thank you…" She flashed a smile at him, and turned on her heel, in an attempt to beeline out of the tent – obviously Blank didn't provide much help, or she had a sudden realization about things.
He watched her hair spin around her and her hands move swiftly to the flap to open it. A spray of sunlight splashed over him – he knew he should get up.
?
"It's going to be dangerous, you know…" The man informed the larger man.
"Hell if I'm going to let that stop me!"
"I've always admired the courage that comes along with your crew, you've taught them all well."
They walked along the outside of all the tents slowly, as though waiting for something more to happen. The activities would start again after he was gone. "It wasn't me really – according to them I'm a shitty teacher, but I do try my best to keep 'em in line!"
Steiner reframed from rolling his eyes. Baku's crew was the most disobedient group in the whole resistance. It had been proven countless times – even before Zidane had returned, or Blank left their group – that they were idiotic though gutsy for trying to pull things off the way they did.
They were unorganized and argumentive, but somehow they always came out on top. The knight never saw a day go by that one of them wasn't fighting with another, but in the end they always had each other's backs and that, Steiner believed, is why he truly respected them.
His heavy armor bore down on his shoulders, and sometime, he would have to remove it for a break. His charcoal eyes glanced at Baku – the man didn't envy much about the Tantalus leader – with his big ears, weird beard, and large gut, but the leather armor was something Steiner could never get used to, no matter how hard he wished he could.
"Do you think you're going to lose someone when you're in Terra?" He questioned, almost afraid of Baku's answer.
The leader was very honest, and both him and Steiner knew the risks of this mission – especially having Zidane there. Of course this was going to work to their advantage, but it could also work in a very negative way as well. There could be too many people, and no way of calling for reinforcements.
"Don't say a thing to anyone, Steiner…" Baku sighed and drew his fingers down his beard, reshaping it in all its silliness. "I don't believe all of us will come back…"
Steiner was surprised. Actually, he was beyond surprised – he was shocked. Gaping and unbelieving, the only word that stumbled out of his stuttering lips was, "Who?"
"Zidane…"
Steiner straightened up and set his jaw. The kid made many mistakes, and let's just say Steiner was more fond of others than he was the Genome, but the boy had potential. He was stronger than most, and knew the ins and outs of the battle. Plus, he always had everyone's back and Dagger – oh Dagger – she would be heartbroken. As much as the knight hated to admit it, the young Princess needed him more than anyone else in the resistance…
"He doesn't understand just how much Kuja wants him back. Using him as a decoy is ample opportunity to get what we want when we want it – unfortunately Zidane doesn't understand the risks – nobody but perhaps myself and Cinna do…"
"Cinna?" The knight's eyebrows shot up in shock.
"Yeah. The guy approached me about this as soon as we had our mission assigned to us – and I agree with him… Everyone still thinks of that damn monkey as they did before he became important and rare. They still believe they're all on equal terms, they all believe Marcus is still the strongest, and that Blank will never get taller… It's like nothing ever changed, and that's what concerns me. Of course, there's no telling them, and the dumb shits wouldn't care either way…" Baku shrugged, "There's nothing I can do about it."
Steiner bit his lip, still wrapped up in the fact that no matter how long this mission took – or how much training they had before hand, this mission could fail miserably – at the cost of some of their most talented members. But of course, he wouldn't say a thing – Baku didn't want it, and Steiner knew the Tantalus crew was the best for the job. He only nodded, "If you'll excuse me, Baku, I must go."
"Don't tell nobody…"
"Not directly anyways…" He walked away, intending to find Dagger before Zidane left.
?
A pair of chocolate eyes watched the movement below her. Perched upon a hill, she leaned against the tree, her porcelain face having a certain glow around it. To anyone who didn't know her, she was strong and confident – a leader in the making. To Steiner, she was worried and hesitant at the moment.
"Dagger…" He puffed, finally reaching the top of the hill. "What are you doing up here alone?"
"I just needed some time to think about some things… I'm sorry…" Though it didn't meet her eyes as she watched the blonde below wrap his tail around Marcus so he couldn't move and drop kick him – causing him to drop his finally dry shirt onto the still wet grass.
The pointy eared teammate spun around towards the blonde, punched him, and grabbed his tail, spinning him around until they were both dizzy, fallen, and laughing – all completely wet.
"About Zidane?" He guessed – she stared at him in amazement, as she had ever since she was a little girl; the raven haired girl never understood quite how he could do it.
"I don't know what to do…" She sighed and looked away, watching a bee fly from a flower, and she moved her hand away, "I know what you'll tell me…" She began, though trailed again, the wind whisking away her voice.
"Dagger… I know you know that I do not have any liking in Zidane… But I know the way that he looks at you – I know the way that you look at him –" When she tried to protest he simply put up a hand, "He's going to be put in a very dangerous situation… And, as much as I hate to admit it, the kid knows how to protect people, and sacrifice is part of that protection… There's a good possibility he just might not come back."
Hearing this was a high shock. She opened her mouth to speak, then shut it quietly again, and repeated the process. Her goldfish like features only made Steiner grimmer about revealing this to her. The thought of Zidane dying to protect another was already a thought in everyone's mind, but it was the same as everyone else. She would give her life to protect anyone else in the resistance, and she knew they would do the same for everyone else as well… But hearing those words come from Steiner's mouth – it all became surreal.
Quite frankly, that scared her.
She knew she had a choice to make, and she understood just how important it was that she do the right thing as she watched Steiner slowly make his way back down the hill. Closing her eyes she leaned back, before the start of an airship made her jump. It was time for them to get serious about leaving.
Leaping to her feet, she burst down the hill, her breath coming in short bursts out of her as she ran – She needed to reach Zidane before he boarded that ship.
? meanwhile ?
Vivi walked over to Zidane – his shy manner shining through easily. The blonde smiled brightly at him as he approached.
"Hey Vivi!" He waved, and bent down so he was level with the mage.
"Hi Zidane…" The voice held unwavering sadness, and it slightly unnerved Zidane, causing his brow to crease in concern.
"What's up?"
"I just came to say good-bye…" He mumbled, "And ask you a question."
"Shoot!" The blonde tried being as friendly as possible, but the truth was that he couldn't quite pin what was bothering the mage, and that in turn, bothered him.
"What do I do here all alone?" He asked helplessly, peering up at the older teen.
"What do you mean all alone?" Zidane laughed, "You've got Dagger and Beatrix and –"
"You're the only one who really understands what I'm going through… You have friends in this resistance that you knew before you got captured, and I have nobody… I'm suppose to train people, when I'm not even sure of myself… I'm supposed to be strong for a cause I don't even understand, and I'm trying to fight for memories that won't come back to me. I don't know what to do, Zidane, because whenever you're here, I feel a little better, but when you're not, I'm just some partially useful black mage who went faulty and couldn't be used by Kuja anymore!"
It was more than he had ever heard Vivi say in his entire life. The mage was normally so quiet, and so reserved, that Zidane thought the mage was indeed getting more confident. He was of course, this was true, but not having Zidane around – the one he could count on, even when they didn't know each other – way back in the alley – it was a scary thought.
The blonde blinked his sapphire eyes. He truly didn't know what to say to Vivi's speech. He only patted the mage's shoulder, and smirked, "Vivi…" His thoughts tried to improvise and sound sincere as they left his lips, "You're going to do great here, and I'll be back," He beamed at this, "And when I get back, you're going to have trained everyone, and who knows – maybe it'll be me needing you." He seemed to be flustered by that comment.
Hugging the blonde, Vivi mumbled a thank you and quickly pulled back. Zidane smiled fondly, "Good luck…"
"You too…" the short mage nodded, and turned to walk away.
"Zidane! We're leaving!" Marcus' deep voice called out from the ship entrance.
"Okay, okay…" He waved a hand, and taking one last look at a small beauty in the barren wasteland of this continent, he turned to leave.
Walking a few feet, he stretched, and was about to break into a run up the ramp to board the ship when he heard a shrill voice behind him.
"Stop!" It demanded, though one couldn't take it very seriously, being a high soprano, and uncertainty filling its tone.
He turned around, only to get barged into by Dagger, she clung to his body like her life depended on it.
They stayed liked this for a while, and finally, Zidane hugged the girl back, though he was still highly confused. "Dagger?" He finally breathed out the question.
She thought about how different things would be without him here now. She wondered if she'd still laugh and fool around with people – of course it wasn't as though she would be miserable, but the sheer fact that Zidane had been in her life for so many months, and making such an impact, that she questioned how stable she would be in battle and training when her thoughts would revolve around him.
"I'm so sorry!" She squeezed him tighter, afraid of letting him go, "I didn't want you to leave before I talked to you… I'm so sorry I was angry I –"
Before she could speak anymore, he wiggled backwards, and bent forward, crushing his lips onto hers. That was it. The public display of affection for, if not a lot, at least a few of the resistance members to see.
What was left of the Tantalus crew off the ship around them cheered, she could feel a certain gaping stare into her and the boy in front of her by Steiner, but she knew Beatrix would be grinning somewhere near by. She knew there were others around, but she for once, didn't care what they would say when he was gone… She'd have to explain and suffer through that, but it was something she was willing to do.
When he finally pulled back from her, she looked up at him with watery chocolate eyes. "Come back safely, please…" She whispered to him, and he smiled.
"Of course I'm going to come back. I promise…" He laughed and ruffled her raven hair.
When he turned to leave, she caught his hand, studying him when he turned around. Seeing the garnet still hanging from his neck, she held hers up as well, "Remember to bring it back to me."
He nodded, "Always will…" With that he boarded the ship, not turning back.
As the ship took off, she stared after it, running as quickly as she could to try and keep up with it, before it wasn't in sight anymore. She bit her lip and watched him go, clutching the garnet around her neck, wondering if he would do the same.
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A/N: So I know I guess that was a little weak, but I enjoyed writing it :) they couldn't have some dramatic moment that lasted over a page – cause they're waiting on Zidane to leave… Plus, her having her last, brief words with him, makes it all the more bitter.
I hope you enjoyed the chapter! Please review!
-zesty-
