The night before the festival is eerily mundane in a way that doesn't feel at all appropriate. There's no weighty silence, no calm before the storm. The city still hums with its usual burbling chatter, the dull roar of early evening traffic, the chime of the crossing signals, and the blaring advertisements that herald the impending holiday season. The world is on the verge of being remade, and it chooses to remain oblivious.

As you swat aside a cluster of butterflies swarming low above the sidewalk, you notice that the people around you pass straight through them, unbothered. Almost each and every one. Yet, for a crowd seemingly infested by Shadows, what unnerves you the most is that if it weren't for the black monarchs, you'd never be able to tell.

They smile.

They laugh with one another.

They discuss the weather, fiddle with their phones, hold hands.

The end of humanity shouldn't be so tranquil.

As you enter your neighborhood, you inhale deeply in an effort to chase away the exhaustion that's been plaguing you. Every night this week, returning home has felt like entering an abandoned house – quiet and dark, with the only signs of life being the sliver of light leaking out from under the door to your parents' room and the boxes of lukewarm takeout left out for you on the table.

But tonight, the first you thing you notice as you unlock the gate and sidle through is the soft, yellow light streaming through the windows. Your breath catches in your throat. The sound of muffled voices reaches your ears as you place your hand on the door handle, and you dash inside.

The smell of hot oil and sizzling meat hits your nose as soon as you enter, a scent so familiar and comforting that tears start to well up in the corners of your eyes. However, when you round the corner, you discover that it isn't Mom sitting in the kitchen with Dad.

Rin glances up from her bowl of pork with flecks of sauce speckling her cheeks.

"'Sup?"

You glance between her and Dad in search of an explanation. You're not upset that it's her, it's just…not who you were expecting.

"There he is! I didn't know you were having someone over tonight, so I just made something quick and easy."

Judging from all the dirty cookware strewn across the counter, there wasn't anything quick or easy about it, but Dad doesn't seem to mind. In fact, this is the most cheerful he's been since Mom's breakdown.

"Here."

He plunks down a bowlful of steaming noodles in front of you, topping it with a generous spoonful of pork coated in sweet, amber sauce. Then, he hastily boxes up the leftovers and goes about washing up the dishes.

"You're not eating with us?" you ask, somewhat crestfallen.

"I'll eat later, no worries," he replies with a sly wink. "I'm, uh, still on duty tonight," he adds, his smile flattening slightly as he nods towards a package of crackers and a bottle of sleeping pills on the counter. Once he finishes drying the last pot, he scoops them into his hands and retreats towards the stairs.

"I'll just…give you guys some space tonight, all right? You can give me a shout if you need anything. Or don't! It's up to you!"

Then, with a silly grin plastered across his face, Dad shuffles backwards up the steps and out of sight.

"What did you say to him?" you ask, feigning exasperation.

A demure smirk plays across Rin's lips.

"Wouldn't you like to know."

"Why are you like this?"

She giggles. You can't get enough of that sound, high and clear like wind chimes.

"Relax, all I did was ask if you were home. Besides," she says, wiping her face with a napkin, "I could never mess with your dad - he's the best. He barely even asked why I was here, he just sat me down at the table and started cooking."

"Yeah, that sounds about right. Speaking of which, what are you doing here?"

Hunching over in her seat, Rin absentmindedly scoops up a few noodles and lets them drop back into her bowl.

"I, uh…felt like a change of scenery. Gin's been getting on my nerves lately."

"Yikes, sorry about that."

"Hey, don't start blaming yourself," she says, straightening back up and waving you off. "I…actually wanted to come see you anyways."

You're so accustomed to Rin's teasing that the sudden sincerity in her voice catches you by surprise. A sudden warmth starts building in your chest, radiating outwards until your skin tingles and your head begins to feel light.

"…I'm glad you did."

Quiet fills the space between the two of you, something awkward and clumsy and buzzing with an energy both intoxicating and heady. Instead of ineptly fumbling about for conversation, it seems like enough to let the feeling surround and permeate you while you finish your meals. The moment, though it lasts for only a few minutes, fills your heart with a longing you're desperate to share.

"Hey. Do you wanna help me with something?"

Rin blinks rapidly, as if coming out of a trance.

"Hmm? Yeah, what is it?"

After you've cleaned up, you lead Rin into the garage where your audio equipment sits forlornly in a corner, pushed aside and forgotten in the wake of your campaign against the Shadows. As you drag it out into the middle of the floor and start hooking everything up, Rin takes a folder off of the top of your amp and opens it.

"Is this all yours?" she asks, holding up a couple pages of sheet music. "Like, did you write this?"

"Yeah. I've been working on an album for Dad."

You unzip your guitar case and lay the instrument across your lap, running your fingers across its red, lacquered surface.

"He was the one that got me this guitar for my birthday. Taught me how to play, too. I've always really loved music, so it meant a lot to me. I figured now that I've gotten decent at it, maybe I should do something special for him to say thanks. Although-"

A pang of guilt lances through your heart as you run a finger through the layer of dust that's accumulated on a length of cable.

"-I guess I put it aside a little longer than I meant to."

Rin takes one more curious glance around at everything before dropping back into a beanbag chair.

"Sooo…what did you want me to help with? Am I gonna get to listen you to play again?"

"Yeah, that," you say, hoping that what you're about to suggest isn't too much to ask. "But I was also wondering if you wanted to sing with me."

Her eyes go wide in a fit of rabbitish fight or flight as a trickle of stammering tumbles from her mouth.

"I-It's just one track, though – I don't even have any lyrics written. I just thought it would sound nice with some vocalization," you explain hurriedly. "Y'know…like the way you sang at the lake."

Rin lets out a groan, sinking deeper into the beanbag chair as if begging it to swallow her whole.

"You're not gonna let that go, huh?"

"What, and pass up the opportunity to make you sweat for once?" you say, and the two of you share a round of awkward chuckling. "No, but seriously, I don't get why you're embarrassed. You sound great."

Propping her elbows up on her knees, Rin leans forward as she fiddles with her hair and tries not to make eye contact.

"I'm not embarrassed, I just think you're making too much of it. It's not even really singing; it's just gibberish."

"I don't think that matters. When I was learning to play guitar, Dad would tell me that good music isn't always about the skill you have, but the feeling you put into it. As long as your feelings are clear, even the simplest song will sound beautiful."

A small, wistful smile creeps across Rin's lips as she draws her knees up close to her body.

"Feelings, huh? I only ever…sang" – she pauses, frowning as if the word left a strange taste in her mouth – "whenever I had trouble sleeping. I'd lay there with all these scary thoughts swirling around in my head, keeping me awake. When I was little, I used to just scream or cry, but all that did was make Gin upset – and the fosters angry. But I figured out that if I snuck off somewhere quiet and hummed to myself instead, no one got mad."

Her gaze finds yours, and in it you can see that she's somewhere far away, withdrawn behind those mirrors of jade.

"That's all it is. I don't do it because I love music, or I want people to hear, or anything like that. I do it because I'm a little fuckin' weirdo who can't think like a normal person. I'm…flattered that you want to hear me sing, but I don't think any of the feelings I put into it are worth hearing."

A moment passes as her thoughts hang in the air between you. Then, brushing them aside, you cross that short space to wrap yourself around her, to suffocate every ounce of loathing and replace it with the love she deserves to know. There's a brief flash of panic as she freezes in your embrace, but that quickly turns to relief as her arms gently slide around your back and she brings her head to rest on your shoulder. The world melts away in the background as you revel in each other's closeness, pulses quickening, breath shortening, fingers clutching greedily at the back of each other's shirts in an attempt to hold as much of another person as your grasp will allow.

Something dampens your shoulder, and Rin chokes out a shaky laugh.

"Wh…What are we doing here, Tetsuo?"

Startled, you draw back to find tears rolling down her cheeks.

"A-Ah! Sorry, was that not okay?" you sputter, but she merely shakes her head and pulls you in tight again.

"No, it's okay…I want this."

Every human being experiences longing over the course of their lives, but longing, as you now realize, pales in comparison to the ecstasy of love reciprocated. Love, intoxicating and triumphant, soars through your heart in those fleeting, wordless seconds you spend pressed against Rin Jidou, purging the fear, doubt, and anger that have taken up residence in its dark corners. To be wanted in the way that her touch suggests puts you at peace in a way that you haven't felt in a long time.

"Tetsuo."

"Hm?"

Conversation feels too profane, an acknowledgement that the moment has passed. But all things, of course, are temporary, especially the ones you cling to the most.

"There's something I need to tell you," she begins, her expression tightening.

"Sure. You can tell me anything."

You're trying to be reassuring, but the reluctance in her tone threatens to make the bottom drop out of your stomach, similarly to the way one feels when they stand at the edge of a great height.

"Right, right…"

She inhales deeply.

"For a while now…I've given up on living," she says, and you tumble off the ledge. Whether it's from surprise or sympathy, it's hard to say, but hearing her say that sends a sharp pain through your heart that blurs your vision.

"After Gin and I left our last foster home, there was a point where I started to feel like nothing would ever go right again. I'd never had my own room or toys, never been held, never had anyone say they loved me but Gin… After a while, I just got numb. Like a doll. Which seemed fitting, right? After all, Mom and Dad just tossed me aside like a boring toy. I figured, why not do the same?"

Fresh tears well up in the corners of her eyes as she grabs the edge of your sleeve and pulls it tight.

"I wanted to die, but I guess I've always been too much of a coward to take care of it myself. So I decided to leave things up to fate. I'd do whatever I wanted – and let God decide when the ride was over."

"Do you still feel that way?"

Her gaze slides away from yours.

"I…I don't know. I've had some good days since I met you, but no matter how good they are, the numbness always comes back. Like I told you before, it makes me think there's something broken up here," she says, tapping her head, "and sometimes I wonder if it's going to be that way forever."

She then fixes you with an intense, pained stare.

"Tetsuo...if you were me, would you put my name in Avalon? Before it's gone for good?"

You open your mouth to answer, but only an empty breath escapes. For some reason, unlike Saito or Nisekao, the thought of turning her over to her Shadow is too much to accept.

"No. No, I wouldn't. You can't do that."

A look of puzzlement passes across her face.

"Really? You'd leave me the way I am? Even if I can't be fixed? Why?"

Gently, you reach up to hold her face in your hands.

"Because I'm not okay, either. There are times where I feel sad, or angry, or lonely, and I can't even really explain why. Everything that's been happening lately is starting to terrify me, and I'm starting to think that maybe I don't have the strength to make the right decisions anymore.

"But you believe in me. And whenever you're around, I don't feel those doubts anymore. I think everyone needs that person who makes them feel like everything is going to be all right, even when it's absolutely not. You're that person for me…and I want to be that person for you. I don't want to live with your Shadow. I want to live with you, no matter who you are."

Rin exhales sharply, closing her eyes. "I see."

Without warning, she draws near, her lips hovering only a few tantalizing millimeters from yours. Your eyes snap shut as you prepare for what comes next, yet after several excruciating seconds, she refuses to come any closer.

Then, you realize it – she's waiting for you. To prove that you mean what you say.

You place a hand behind her head, and draw her into you. The distance between you evaporates, crackling with the faint electricity of touch, and your lips meet. She presses herself insistently against you, as if to bring every part of herself as close to you as your mouths are now.

Eventually, you pull apart – only slightly – and bask in the glow of the confession you've made. Breathless, you stare into her eyes in an effort to commit this moment to memory. Rin flashes you one of her familiar, coy smiles.

"I've been wanting to do that for a while," she murmurs.

"You've never been very subtle."

"Teasing you won't be very much fun now that you know I mean it."

"You're still going to do it anyways."

"Fair enough," she chuckles dryly as she snuggles up closer to your chest. She then takes a sidelong glance at your guitar, a silent witness in its unzipped case.

"Hey...I know you wanted me to help you out with your album, but...is it okay if we don't do that tonight? There's still a lot I gotta sort through before I feel like doing that. When I can really put my heart into it, Tetsuo, I'll sing for you again. For now, can we just stay like this a little longer?"

"Of course. Take as long as you want," you tell her, and the two of you spend a long while doing just that.