Great News, Readers! The Wait is Finally Over and the New Chapter is HERE!
I apologize for this taking so long. This was the HARDEST chapter I've written so far for this story. However, I believe that following chapters will be easier to write and take less time.
"Oh Vaggie, my dear," Alastor passionately said to the one-eyed hotel manager. "I've been such a fool. I curse all the times I did not notice your intelligence, strength, and beauty."
"Alastor…" a blushing Vaggie responded to the Radio Demon.
"Truly no woman can compare to you."
"Kiss me, my lord!"
"With pleasure!"
The two put their arms around one another and just as their lips were about to meet…
"AAAGGGHHH!" Lincoln screamed himself awake. The boy looked around to find himself in his bedroom. He breathed a sigh of relief at realizing it was just a dream. A very strange dream. "Where did that come from?!"
It was morning in Hell, specifically Pentagram City. However, at a little hotel on the outskirts of the city, a certain white-haired human boy had just woken up. Lincoln Loud got out of bed and walked over to open his bedroom window to get some fresh morning air. Unfortunately, he forgot he was in Hell and was reminded that the air reeked of pollution, the scent of rotting flesh, raw sewage, and other nasty smelling things. He heard the sounds of car horns and demons shouting and cursing at each other in traffic. However, this did not bother Lincoln for he had gotten used to it by now.
"Good morning, hellish realm of eternal suffering and depravity," Lincoln greeted.
"Good morning," an Egg Boi standing on the ledge greeted back startling the boy.
"Hey, aren't you one of Sir Pentious's minions?" the kid asked recognizing the egglike creature.
"That's me," the egg minion confirmed.
"What are you doing up here?"
"The boss has been gone for a while, so I came to check on him." Then the Egg Boi looked down at the ground many stories below. "Can I come in? I don't want to fall and get scrambled."
The young boy helped the little egg demon inside then set him outside his door.
"Your boss's room is upstairs. Just head down this hall, go up the stairs, then take a left and it should be the tenth room on the right," he instructed.
"Thanks," the Egg Boi said and was on his way.
After that, Lincoln dressed into his bellhop uniform and began making his way downstairs to perform his duties. However, his facial expression indicated he had something on his mind that he had mixed feelings about.
"You're all probably wondering what's on my mind," he said to the readers. "Well, it's what Charlie told me last night…"
Flashback to Last Night
"Something chose you specifically and had you brought here for a reason, and I think this is the reason," he remembered the princess's words. "Don't you see? It's you! You are the One!"
End of Flashback
Charlie's words that night dwelled constantly on his mind. It was hard for him to believe, like many things he had recently experienced. But the fact was that he was in Hell among real live demons, something he never thought he'd experience despite his already insane lifestyle back home. Right now, he was trying to figure out how he should cope with this.
"To be honest, I'm really not sure if she's entirely right on that," Lincoln admitted to the readers. "Me being some "chosen one" of some prophecy, as cool as that would be, just doesn't sound possible."
Another Flashback to that Same Night
Lincoln just stared at Charlie for a good long moment after listening to what she had just told him about the prophecy and how she believed he was the one it was referring to. Then he turned his gaze to the floor as he continued to process what he had heard.
Most of the other hotel residents looked a little concerned as they feared this might put too much pressure on the boy and make him anxious. Sir Pentious, however, just stared dumbstruck and jaw dropped. Meeting the only living human child in Hell was something he wasn't prepared for but hearing this had him just as shocked and bewildered as Lincoln.
"Are you sure about that?" the boy asked.
"Yes," Charlie replied undoubtfully. "You're clever, sweet, and still human. You definitely don't deserve to be in Hell. It has to be you."
However, the young human still wasn't convinced.
"I don't know. Maybe you have the wrong person. What about Vaggie? She's not like other demons I've seen. She doesn't behave like them. She's more sensible and morally adjusted and I've never seen her indulge in any of the sinful things they do." You'd think his words would make the one-eyed Hispanic manager feel flattered, but they actually made her look a little nervous.
"Trust me, kid. I do deserve to be down here," Vaggie admitted with a sad expression.
"No offense, Charlie," Lincoln said. "I really do believe your hotel will work out one way or another, but I'm not sure you're entirely right on this one. I can perform simple magic tricks but not miracles. I'm only human."
"And that is exactly why I believe you're the most likely person," she replied. "I've always believed that there was something so magical and fantastic about humans."
"Really?" Lincoln asked surprised and confused. "How?"
"My father gave you all something Heaven never intended you to have so long ago: the gift of free will. This gift prevents you from being conditioned to follow every rule Heaven has placed for you. Just think about it. Many human souls end up here because they don't follow all of Heaven's rules. But how many human souls go to Heaven without following all of their rules?"
This made Lincoln ponder for a moment. When she puts it that way it does sound a little amazing. That being said, it still wasn't enough to fully convince him.
"Are you starting to understand it?" Charlie asked. "You shouldn't underestimate the power of the human soul. It's power to decide its own fate. And with that power, I believe you will be able to do extraordinary things."
"She's right, my boy," Alastor agreed surprisingly. "You'd be surprised at what a soul can accomplish when they take charge of their own fate."
Lincoln pondered for a little while longer. Could what Charlie was telling him be true? No, it couldn't be. Not him of all people.
Noticing how confused and nervous he looked, Charlie began to think that maybe she put a little too much on the boy's shoulders a little too early. The princess knelt down, put her hands on his shoulders, and looked at him with a comforting smile.
"I know this is a lot to take in, so I'll give you some time to think about it. Take as much as you need," she said tenderly. "Lincoln Loud, with you at our side, I know great and amazing things are coming our way!"
End of Another Flashback
The memories of last night played constantly in his head like a record on repeat, and yet he was still unsure what to think of it.
"I wonder what the others think," Lincoln wondered.
Perhaps they could help him understand what he should do.
Lincoln made his way down to the lobby where he found everyone sitting around doing their own thing. Husk was cleaning glasses and bottles while Angel Dust was flirting with him, Sir Pentious was looking over some blueprints, Niffty was chasing a bug with a needle, and Vaggie was arguing with Alastor while Charlie was trying to pacify the quarrel.
About what he'd expect from these people by now.
"I'm just saying we could acquire more patrons if we trying being a little more assertive in our methods," the Radio Demon suggested.
"Kidnapping and hostages is NOT the way to get people to come here!" an angry Vaggie said.
"Guys, stop!" Charlie pleaded for the two to stop fighting.
"Then maybe you should learn to smile!" Alastor said tauntingly tickled the underside of Vaggie's chin making her even angrier. "You know you're never fully dressed without one."
As Lincoln watched the two argue, a flash from his dream appeared before him; Alastor was tickling the underside of Vaggie's chin and both were smiling and staring at each other with passion-filled eyes.
"Alastor…"
"Vaggie…"
"AAARRRRGGGHHH!" Lincoln yelped and averted his eyes from the disturbing image.
There was a moment of silence before he looked up and found the vision was gone and everyone in the room staring curiously at him. The atmosphere in the room suddenly became very uncomfortable due to the awkward silence.
"Um… I… uh…" the boy stammered while blushing with embarrassment. "I'll just go check on… something."
Wasting no time, the young human left the room leaving the demons speechless with confusion.
Charlie looked over at Vaggie as if asking if she knew anything about that strange and unexpected outburst from their young bellboy. The one-eyed manager only shrugged in response; even she had no idea what that was about.
Lincoln was walking through the halls trying to push the disturbing thoughts out of his head when a creepy shadow came looming up behind him.
"Have a lot on our mind, young Mr. Loud?" asked a familiar and creepy voice which nearly made the boy jump.
Lincoln turned around to find Alastor standing behind him staring down with that creepy grin of his.
"Alastor, w-what are you doing?" the bellboy cautiously asked.
"Just thought I'd check up on our sole human resident and only bellhop."
"Hey Alastor, do you honestly believe I'm the One Charlie spoke of?" he asked.
"Well, if you want my honest opinion… No, of course not," the Radio Demon answered bluntly and brutally honestly. "The idea is just as farfetched as the idea of redeeming the souls of sinners."
The Radio Demon's words felt like a slap across the face.
"Then why are you supporting it?" Lincoln asked his next question.
"For the one thing that truly matters when you're down here, my boy: entertainment. There is no escaping our eternal damnation in Hell so it's best to make the most of it and what better way than to watch desperate and determined souls try to accomplish what's never been done and fail spectacularly?"
"I'm not a sinner, but I can think of better ways to spend one's time than enjoying the suffering of others," Lincoln replied unenthusiastically. The Radio Demon's pessimistic and sadistic ideology did not sit well with him.
Alastor chuckled as he bent down to be a little closer to pinch the boy's cheek. "You still have so much to learn, young one."
The young human bellhop wandered the halls until he came across the room where Sir Pentious was living in. He stopped and, with nothing else to do at the moment, knocked on the door.
"Vamoose! Great inventor at work in here!" the snake sinner said from behind the door.
"Uh… Sir Pentious?" Lincoln called.
There was a brief sound of cluttering before the door opened. The snakelike inventor stood in the doorway looking down at the boy.
"Ah! If it isn't the nice young human bellboy," he said with a delighted smile. "What brings you to me, young Mr. Loud?"
"I was… wondering if you needed anything," Lincoln replied.
"Well, as a matter of fact, I could use your assistance."
Sir Pentious led the boy inside and showed him a new type of machine he was working on. It looked cool, but Lincoln couldn't tell what it was or what it was supposed to do.
"What is it?" the boy curiously asked.
"This is my greatest invention thus far!" the snake demon boasted. "I call it… the Thunder Cracker! With it I can cause bad weather to any of my enemies should they be in an area."
"What about the… I don't know if I should call them innocent… other people in the area?" Lincoln pointed out. "Won't it affect them too?"
The inventor opened his mouth to answer but no words came out. He paused for a moment to think of how to answer the question.
"Oh, we'll worry about that later," he brushed off the question. "First, I need to put the finishing touches on it." He began tinkering with the machine. "Hand me that combination spanner please."
Lincoln grabbed a wrench from a nearby table that had dozens of tools sitting on it. There was a question on the boy's mind that he wanted to ask but wasn't sure if he should. What if he didn't like the answer? Summing up his courage, he decided to ask anyway.
"Pentious, do you think I'm the One Charlie says I am?" he asked curiously while handing the tool to Pentious.
"Do I think you're the One?" the snakelike inventor turned his attention to the boy and repeated the question. "No, I don't think you're the One."
"Oh," Lincoln said hanging his head with a hint of sadness on his face.
"I KNOW you're the One!"
"Wait! Really?"
"Of course, dear child," the former villain wannabe admitted wholeheartedly while continuing to tinker with his machine. "Why else would a living human be down here in Hell? So, if Princess Charlotte believes you to be the Chosen One, then I will believe it too! Plus, if it is possible for sinners to redeem their souls, I think you will play a vital role in making it happen."
"You really believe that?" Lincoln asked both surprised and touched.
"From the moment I learned of the prophecy," the inventor confirmed with a warm smile and ruffled the boy's white hair. "I think that's done it," he said finishing his tinkering with the machine. "Now, let's give it a try."
The snakelike inventor pulled a lever activating the machine. It started revving up. Lincoln took cover behind the snake demon for safety while Pentious used his body to shield the boy from any danger. A big exhaust pipe at the top started spewing out black smoke which floated directly above their heads. Suddenly, bright lights started flashing from the smoke followed by loud banging noises.
"Behold!" Pentious declared proudly. "Instant thunderstorm!"
"Wow! You really did it!" an amazed Lincoln congratulated. But then his smile faded as he remembered the consequences. "Vaggie is not going to like this."
"Take a good look, child!" Pentious continued to boast. "The Great Sir Pentious has triumphed!"
Suddenly, the inventor was struck by a thunderbolt from his own invention frying him. Looks like he still had some bugs he needed to work out.
Later, Lincoln and Husk were sitting in the parlor playing cards together.
"Husk, what do you think about the prophecy and me?" Lincoln asked.
"Look kid, everyone wants to believe they were chosen for something important," the catlike bartender explained. "But if we all waited around for some prophecy to make us feel special… well, most of us have ended up down here now. What I'm saying is: you need to choose for yourself."
"Thanks, Husk," the boy said gratefully and smiled.
The old bartender smiled right back.
"Oh, look at this!" Lincoln said smugly. "Four Kings!" He laid out his cards.
"Oh, wow!" Husk replied pretending to be impressed. "Straight Flush!" Then he laid out his cards.
"Dang it," Lincoln grumbled in mild annoyance.
"Don't sweat it, kid," Husk said patting the boy's head. "I have to admit, it's been a while since someone gave me a run for my money."
"Thanks," Lincoln accepted the compliment. "Next time you're going down."
"We'll see," Husk replied with a grin in anticipation for their future rematch.
Just then, the sound of arguing was heard approaching. Lincoln and Husk turned to see Charlie, Vaggie, and Alastor enter the room, the latter two were in another heated argument.
"Well, at least I take this hotel and its mission seriously!" Vaggie angrily snapped.
"Well, unfortunately, you don't have the power or influence to promote it!" Alastor smugly retorted.
"Well, at least I don't go around making other people fear me!"
"That's because you're barely the most threatening thing here!"
"You have NO idea what I'm capable of!"
"Shall we find out?!" Alastor challenged.
"Stop it, you two!" Charlie ordered.
Suddenly, another flash from his dream appeared right before Lincoln's eyes. Once again, Alastor and Vaggie were staring at each other passionately.
"Alastor, my lord, my love, let me show you what I'm capable of!" the lovestruck one-eyed manager pleaded.
"Yes, my dear!" the Radio Demon replied just as lovestruck. "Please show me!"
"NO! DON'T DO THAT!" Lincoln cried in horror.
After his outburst, everything went silent. Once again, Lincoln found that the vision had disappeared and he was in another uncomfortable and awkward situation as all eyes were now trained on him.
"Uh… Does anyone to get anything from any stores?" the embarrassed white-haired boy asked. He needed to find a way to get out of this.
"Uh… Niffty was just about to head into town for–" a confused Charlie answered.
"Perfect! I'll go with her!" Lincoln interrupted and ran up to his room to get ready once again leaving everyone in confused silence.
"I wonder what's eating him today," Husk pondered.
Niffty went out with Lincoln (wearing his hoodie) to do a little shopping around the city for supplies for the hotel. After the strange and disturbing dream visions he'd been having leading to painfully awkward moments, as well as the stress from the news of the prophecy, Lincoln needed an opportunity to clear his mind. The little one-eyed maid was going on and on about the things she wanted to do with her life… when she was alive.
"So, I was an aspiring media influencer," Niffty said.
"Really?" Lincoln replied intrigued.
"Yes, I was also a dog astronaut, schoolgirl with spiderlike mech suit, and a squirrel. I also remember being a duck who was the descendant of a powerful sorceress."
Lincoln stared at the one-eyed cleaning lady for a moment wondering how much of what she said was true. Eventually he decided to change the subject.
"So, Niffty…" he decided to strike up a conversation. "When did you first meet Alastor?"
"Well, that's a really, really interesting story…" she started explaining.
As they walked and chatted, they came across an electronics store with a dozen TV sets on display. Two demons were standing around watching the tv screens. The screens were showing commercials advertising VoxTek merchandise and endorsed by Vox himself. The tv demon displayed a lot of confidence in himself and his products.
"Hey, I remember that guy!" Lincoln said stopping to look at the advertisements. "He tried talking trash about Alastor recently and lost!" The boy chuckled a bit while the two demons stared at him nervously as if he had just lit the fuse to a bomb. "I didn't expect him to show his flat face in public this soon."
Suddenly, one of the two demons grabbed the other and ran away as fast as he could much to Lincoln's confusion. What got them so frightened? Was it something he said?
Then the tv screens started getting staticky. The only thing that was easy to make out was Vox's face. Then Vox's face grew until every part of it was displayed on all the television screens.
Lincoln became nervous. He felt as if the overlord was now staring right at him through the tv screens with those sinister red eyes and that creepy smile full of sharp blue teeth. The expression on his face was practically saying "I see you!" Lincoln wanted to run but he was frozen with fear. He couldn't stop staring into those evil eyes.
"Lincoln, this is no time for dilly-dallying," Niffty said grabbing his arm and pulling him along. "We've got errands to do."
As the two walked away, Lincoln could still feel the tv demon's eyes watching him as he left. Does he know who he is? If so, what could he be planning?
The white-haired boy had learned enough about the Vees to know that they were bad news and should stay away from them. Despite his humiliating defeat against Alastor in that slander standoff, Vox was still as threatening as his reputation made him out to be. Lincoln only felt relief that he was acquainted with Alastor, who seemed to be one of the few people who could stand up to him.
Over at the V Tower, Vox was having lunch (burgers and fries) with his partners. The tv demon was looking very proud of himself.
"What's got you feeling all high and mighty today?" Velvette asked.
"Oh, just sending a little message to our little human guest that we know he's here," Vox boasted.
"Scaring kids, really?" Valentino said disapprovingly. "Don't you think that's a bit too low for you?"
"Oh please, Val," Vox said with a chuckle. "That was nothing compared to what you would do to him, you sick, twisted freak."
Rather than be offended, the pimp demon chuckled. "So true."
"So, what now?" Velvette asked. "We gonna kidnap him or something?"
"I'm afraid that's a little too risky at the moment," Vox answered. "Don't want to draw any negative attention from the Radio Demon and Lucifer's brat yet. Let's buy our time and wait for the right opportunity. For now, let's continue to spy on their activities."
Velvette got up from the table and walked over to a nearby refrigerator.
"By the way, Carmilla Carmine's scheduled an overlord meeting in a couple days," she informed her two male partners. "You plan on joining?"
"I have an uncooperative little pissant to deal with," Val said.
"I won't be joining either," Vox also said. "I've got better shit to do than listen to an old windbag who thinks she's tough shit."
All three overlords chuckled.
"Well, I'll go at least," Velvette said taking a big gray bag out of the fridge. "To represent us and remind all those sad losers who the top dogs in Hell are."
She returned to the table with the bag. A strange golden liquid dripped from the bag as she carried it.
"What's that, Velvette?" Vox asked curiously.
"Oh, just that thing I found," the social media overlord replied. "I plan on showing it off at the upcoming meeting."
She opened the bag and peered inside. A menacing grin spread over her face followed by a sinister chuckle as she stared down at the thing she had hidden in the bag.
"So, Lincoln," Niffty started another conversation. "How are you liking Hell so far?"
"Well, I never thought I'd say this, but it's not as bad as I originally thought," he answered. "I still want to return to Earth, but so far things have been pretty nice. I met all of you guys and learned I'm this chosen one from a prophecy. I think being here is really changing my luck for the better."
Suddenly, a large truck drove by through a puddle and made a big splash which completely soaked the boy. Looks like he spoke too soon.
"Me and my big mouth," Lincoln grumbled in annoyance.
"Oh dear, you're all wet and filthy," Niffty exclaimed. "We better get you back to the hotel right away."
The little one-eyed cleaning lady happily hummed to herself while the boy kept an eye out for any suspicious characters. But as they were walking, they failed to notice someone, or something, spying on them from the shadows of an alley. It had glowing blue eyes and devious smile full of sharp teeth oozing with glowing green drool.
"Hey Niffty," Lincoln said. "Do you think I'm the One like Charlie and Pentious?"
"Hmmm… Well…" the cycloptic cleaning lady began.
"Hey, kids," a raspy voice said coming out of the shadows behind them.
Niffty and Lincoln turned to find a tall and creepy four-armed sinner with dark hair, a pair of antennae on his head, and dressed in raggy clothes towering and staring down at them with eyes that promised sinister intent. The sight and sound of this creature sent shivers down Lincoln's spine.
"Pretty fucked up that two cute lil' things like you ended up down here," he said. "Steal some candy or somethin'?"
"Well… I… uh…" Lincoln stammered nervously. His stranger danger senses were going off in his head.
"How old are you kids?" the demon asked. "Six? Seven?"
While Lincoln was feeling nervous, Niffty just stared blankly up at the stranger.
"How's about you two come with me an' we have some fun?"
"Fun?" Lincoln asked.
"Yeah, I got all sorts of games we can play… They all feel really nice too."
Now his stranger danger senses were screaming. "Uh… sorry, sir… but we need to get home."
But then the demon grabbed the boy's arm. His grip was firm. "What's the hurry, little boy? I'm sure you'll love what I have to offer."
Niffty looked at Lincoln, who looked anxious and terrified. Then she looked back at the demonic stranger and smiled. "Oh my gosh! What dirty, nasty, disgusting language!"
Suddenly, she climbed up the creepy stranger's body until she was at eye level with him. Now it was his turn to be terrified as he stared at her big toothy grin and single eye which was glowing with murderous intent as she pulled a sharp knife out of her clothes.
"Don't you worry, Lincoln," Niffty assured her young friend. "I'll have this cleaned up right away!"
Lincoln watched in shock as Niffty stabbed, slashed, and gutted the creeper until he was barely recognizable.
"Lincoln, can you pretty please call Husk and ask him to tell Al that I picked up a snack for him?" she asked as she stuffed what was left into a bag.
"Sure," the boy uneasily complied and called the hotel bartender on his phone. "Husk?"
"What is it, kid?"
"Niffty wanted me to ask you to tell Alastor she got a snack for him."
"What the hell did she do?!"
After returning to the hotel, Lincoln told the others about the encounter.
"Oh, Lincoln! I'm so sorry!" Charlie apologized hugging the boy. "It's a good thing Niffty was there."
"I was so scared," Lincoln said hugging the princess back.
"That settles it!" Vaggie declared. "I knew life down here would be too dangerous for a human his age."
"Vaggie?" Charlie replied curiously.
"It's about time you learned some self-defense."
"Me?" Lincoln asked.
"Yes," Vaggie confirmed. "Everyone here is capable of defending themselves. Even the new guy."
"That's right," Sir Pentious agreed until he suspected that might have not entirely been a compliment. "Wait, why me in particular?"
"Come on, little man," Vaggie ordered. "Your training begins today!"
A little later, everyone gathered in the hotel's storage room. It was nearly empty save for a few boxes and chairs placed along a few walls. Vaggie and Lincoln stood in the open center of the room while everyone else took a seat.
"Alright kid, it's about time you learned some self-defense," the one-eyed hotel manager declared militaristically to the boy. "You may be a child, but that doesn't mean shit to most people down here. This is Hell, and if you don't learn how to properly defend yourself, this place will eat you up and shit you out without warning or remorse. Understand?"
"Yes, ma'am," Lincoln nervously acknowledged.
"Then let's begin!"
Vaggie began looking through a couple boxes for stuff to use in the lesson. Charlie and Pentious sat nervously hoping Vaggie wouldn't be too rough with the kid, Angel and Husk were making bets, Niffty sat eagerly waiting to see how things would play out, and Alastor sat sipping some tea ready to witness what he believed would be an entertaining spectacle. Eventually, Vaggie found two long wooden sticks.
"Alright, first we start with the basic strike," she said handing one of the sticks to Lincoln. "Now I want you to hit me."
"What?" the confused boy asked.
"You heard me. Hit me."
Very reluctantly, Lincoln lifted the wooden stick above his head and swung it down at his trainer tapping her right on the forehead.
"You held back," she said unfazed.
"I didn't want to–"
"Don't hold back because you're worried about hurting me, I've felt much worse pain. Now try again. Harder this time."
Angel snicked at the last part, the idea that a woman wanting a boy to be harder with a stick sounded funny to him. However, this earned him a threatening glare from Vaggie making him quite down.
Lincoln raised the stick again and swung it down, this time harder, and struck Vaggie in the head causing her to stagger back a little and place a hand on the spot she had been hit much to everyone's surprise.
"Vaggie! I'm sorry! Are you okay?" a concerned Lincoln asked.
The one-eyed Hispanic woman pulled her hand away from her face. But instead of looking upset, she wore a proud smile. "Better."
For the next hour and a half, Vaggie helped Lincoln master quite a few fighting moves. There were a few mess-ups here and there. One time Lincoln and Vaggie clashed sticks, but then she noticed an opening and used her stick to trip the boy and cause him to fall on his back. She patiently waited for him to get back up so they could continue. Lincoln learned how to block and evade certain attacks, but he noticed that his trainer wasn't doing the same. Lincoln also learned a little hand-to-hand combat. Lincoln threw a few swings of his fists at his trainer, but Vaggie stood effortlessly holding the boy at arm's length with a disappointed frown. With fighting skills like that, he would never survive in Hell on his own. Hell, it's a miracle he survived as long as he did with his big family on Earth.
Eventually, Vaggie decided that was enough for the day and everyone left the storage room to continue doing their own things. Vaggie and Lincoln walked alongside each other having a friendly conversation.
"I'm impressed, kid," the one-eyed manager complimented. "You learned today's lessons quicker than I thought."
"Thanks, Vaggie," Lincoln replied grateful for the compliment. However, something was still weighing on his mind. "By the way, no offense, but you didn't do a lot of dodging or blocking during the training." Vaggie raised an eyebrow in confusion. "It was like you weren't afraid to get hurt at all."
"Don't worry," she assured him. "I'll a lot tougher than I look."
"Vaggie, do you think I'm the One in that prophecy?" the boy asked.
The one-eyed hotel manager didn't answer right away. She looked at him with reluctance, then looked away to think for a moment.
"If Charlie believes you are the One, then I'll support her in any way I can," she finally answered.
Of course she would. One thing anyone can notice about Vaggie is her unrelenting loyalty to Charlie. She would follow her girlfriend into the deepest, darkest, scariest pits of Hell even despite her own doubts. Despite how harsh she could be, that was something Lincoln admired about her. Although, it did little to ease his own concerns about who or what he was supposed to be.
"Has anyone ever tried fighting back against the angels?" Lincoln asked curiously.
"They probably have in the past," Charlie guessed.
"And most likely ended up dead," Vaggie finished. "Exorcists are a lot tougher than demons, even overlords don't dare challenge one. Not only that, but they're also impossible to kill."
"Really?" Lincoln asked.
"Yeah, the only thing people can really do is run and hide," Charlie sadly explained. "And hope they don't get caught until the day is over."
"They're basically an army of invincible, merciless killing machines," Vaggie concluded.
"That's not fair," Lincoln said. It was bad enough that they randomly slaughter people once a year, but they don't allow their victims any way to defend themselves.
"No one is given a chance," Charlie said shedding a tear.
"That's why we need to make this hotel work," Vaggie said comforting her girlfriend. "It's their only hope."
The one-eyed Hispanic manager felt a gentle hand on her shoulder and looked over to see her beloved girlfriend looking at her with tender, loving eyes. She smiled and returned the gesture with her own eye. Lincoln looked up at the two hellish lovebirds with his own eyes filled with tender admiration.
Then Vaggie felt an irritation behind her eyepatch. "Hon, do you have a handkerchief?"
"Sure," she said and pulling one out of her pocket and handing it to her girlfriend. "Here."
Lincoln watched as the one-eyed manager accepted the handkerchief and took off her eyepatch. She blew on it a little to get rid of some dust and then used the handkerchief to wipe the rest off. Then she carefully used it to brush off a few parts around her empty eye socket. Once she was done, she put her patch back on and returned the handkerchief.
"Thanks, hon."
"No problem."
"So… Vaggie? How did that happen anyway?" the concerned and curious boy asked.
Charlie looked at her girlfriend to see if she would answer.
A look of sadness formed on Vaggie's face, and she gently placed the hand over her eyepatch as she recalled the painful memory.
"Sometimes when you try to do the right thing, it can be costly," she answered.
Both Lincoln and Charlie looked concernedly at her. Her vague answer left a lot to the imagination. Even Charlie didn't know all the details.
"Was it worth it?" Lincoln asked.
Vaggie looked up at her concerned girlfriend and smiled. "Yeah. It was."
Then she looked down at the boy and ruffled his hair smiling to let him know everything was fine.
"Am I interrupting a tender moment?" a familiar staticky voice asked tauntingly.
Everyone turned to find Alastor standing right behind them with a mischievous grin. He always had to find some opportunity to mess with people.
"No," an annoyed Vaggie replied.
"What a shame," the Radio Demon said with slight disappointment in his voice.
"Can we help you with anything?"
"Oh no, my dear. But maybe I can help any of you."
"Why would anyone want your help?!" Vaggie snapped. She was growing more and more irritated by the second. "You only do things for others if it benefits you in some way or to take pleasure in their misfortune."
"Of course, why else?!" the Radio Demon retorted as if it was the most obvious answer.
The one-eyed manager finally reached her breaking point.
"You know, Alastor! That smug, condescending, overconfident attitude of yours is going to get you into a shit ton of trouble someday!"
Watching these two bicker yet again brought another bizarre and disturbing vision to Lincoln's eyes. Probably the most disturbing of them all. Vaggie and Alastor now had their arms wrapped around each other, looking into each other's eyes, and wearing nothing but their underwear.
"Alastor!" Vaggie spoke lustfully and caressed the Radio Demon's cheeks. "Take me. Take me now!"
"As you wish, my darling!" Alastor replied in an equally lustful voice and held the Hispanic woman's head.
Lincoln watched in horror as their faces began moving closer and closer to each other with their lips puckering.
Could it be true? No! That's impossible! There was no way! Why was this happening to him?! How could all of this be happening because of one bizarre dream?! None of this made any sense! All he wanted to do was find answers to how to make the hotel work, how to return home, and whether he really was the One in the prophecy. Why won't they go away?!
"NOOOOOOO!" Lincoln screamed. He closed his eyes and covered his ears. He couldn't take it anymore. "STOP! GET OUT OF MY HEAD! LEAVE ME ALONE!"
Everything was silent. Poor Lincoln opened his eyes and once again the vision that plagued his sight had disappeared leaving only a room full of demonic adults staring at him as if he had giant maggots crawling out of his ears. The boy's face turned red and he buried it in his hands.
"You okay, Lincoln?" a concerned Charlie asked.
"You've been acting a little weird all day," an equally concerned Vaggie said.
"Is something troubling you, young man?" a curious Alastor asked.
"It's just… I had a really weird dream last night," the mortified kid reluctantly confessed.
"Couldn't have been that bad," Angel said.
"Do you want to talk about it?" Charlie asked.
"Not… really," the boy replied.
"Why don't you just tell us what it was?" Vaggie insisted.
"I don't think you want to know."
"If we are to help, then we need to know exactly what the problem is," Alastor said.
"Alastor is right," Vaggie agreed making Lincoln even more uncomfortable. "Tell us what the dream was and we'll see if we can help."
Charlie nodded her head in agreement.
Lincoln was hesitant. He knew that if he did tell them about the dream, they would find it too disturbing, even in a place like Hell. But their insistence left him with little choice. Taking a deep breath, he decided to spill the beans.
"Fine, but don't say I didn't warn you," he began. "In my dream, Vaggie and Alastor were there. But then… then… You two fell in love and kissed passionately!"
Everyone in the room was rendered speechless. They all stood in absolute shock at what they heard. Both Alastor and Vaggie's eyes went wide in dismay. They both turned and looked at one another for a moment.
There are some things in the universe that are better left unseen and unheard because our minds could be unable to handle such things. This was one of them.
Alastor was making deathly choking noises, a disturbed Vaggie was mumbling to herself while Charlie was trying to comfort her, Angel was emptying his stomach into a pail, Husk was chuckling to himself, Niffty was staring in amazement and thinking inappropriate and disturbing thoughts, and Sir Pentious was staring in disgust.
"Alastor and ME?! NO! Think pretty things, think pretty things, think Pretty THINGS!" Vaggie kept telling herself as Charlie gently patted her back.
"That is disgusting!" Pentious declared.
"Alright kid, what does your internet history look like?!" Angel asked taking a break from vomiting.
"Oh my! What a dreadful nightmare!" Alastor said clearing his throat.
"I'm really sorry," Lincoln apologized.
"It's alright, Lincoln," Charlie assured. "These things happen, it's not your fault."
"Let's just never speak of it again," a traumatized Vaggie suggested.
"Agreed," Alastor said.
From that moment on, Alastor and Vaggie stopped getting into arguments for the rest of the day.
Later that night, Lincoln had changed into his pajamas and was now ready to call it a night. Ever since he confessed his dream to the others the disturbing visions seemed to have stopped, which brought he much relief. Suddenly, he heard a knocking at his door. The boy walked over and opened it to find Angel Dust.
"Angel?" the boy said surprised.
"How are you doing, short round?" the porn star asked.
"Fine, those visions aren't bothering me anymore," Lincoln answered.
"Thank god."
"I was just about to go to bed."
"Hey, come with me. I got something to show ya'."
"Is it PG or lower?"
"Just come and see."
With very little options, Lincoln succumbed to the porn star's request and began following him down the halls. He didn't know where the spider demon was taking him or what he wanted to show him, but he would soon find out. They took an elevator to the top floor and then walked up to the roof of the hotel.
"What are we doing up here?" the boy asked.
The spider demon didn't answer. He walked over and sat on the ledge. He turned to look at his young human companion, smiled warmly, and patted the spot on the ledge to his right as if asking him to come over and sit with him.
Reluctantly, Lincoln complied and took a seat next to the spider demon on the ledge. He looked up and saw Angel staring up at the sky. The expression on his face looked like genuine happiness and peace. The boy looked up, then his jaw dropped and his eyes went wide as he beheld the many glittering stars in the dark sky past the giant pentagram.
"Beautiful, isn't it?" Angel commented taking notice of the boy's expression. "Gazing up at this during this time is one of the few things I like besides sex, drugs, and causing mayhem."
"Who would've thought the night sky in Hell could look so pretty," Lincoln commented. Then he noticed what looked like two different moons. One was a large red sphere with a pentagram on it and the other was a smaller white glowing orb with several rings and surrounded by wing-like clouds. "Got two strange-looking moons I see."
"That's no moon," Angel said pointing at the smaller white sphere. "That's Heaven."
"That's Heaven up there?!" Lincoln replied surprised.
"That's right, kid. That's where all the angels and winners go to live their afterlives in paradise before coming down here to slaughter us."
"Well, when I help get this hotel working, that will be a thing of the past," Lincoln boasted. After a moment, his confident expression slowly turned into a more uncertain one. Could he really do this? Could he really be able to help change the minds of angels and slave and redeem the souls of demons? He was just a small human child after all. "Angel, do you think I'm the One?"
The kid needed some closure and the multiarmed porn actor was the only trustworthy (mostly) person there.
Angel looked down at the anxious-looking boy. Then he looked up at the sky. He pulled a cigarette out of his suit and lit it. After taking a small puff, he looked back down to the boy with a friendly smile.
"Whether you are this chosen one or not, we're really happy to have you," he said gently ruffling the kid's snow-colored hair.
Lincoln looked at him and smiled. He could tell his words were genuine.
Then the spiderlike porn actor reached into his suit and pulled out what looked like two popsicles. He offered one of them to the young human who, after a moment, accepted it. The two sat together staring up at the starry sky and enjoying the popsicles together.
Lincoln thought about the times he had spent with everyone that day. He had been asking around for everyone's personal opinion on whether they really thought he was the One. Both Charlie and Sir Pentious wholeheartedly believed it; Vaggie, Husk, and Angel had their doubts but still gave their support; Alastor didn't believe it at all; and Niffty… Well, her opinions were her own. But after taking a moment to finally think all this through with a mind unclouded with distracting and disturbing thoughts, the white-haired adolescent finally came to a conclusion. He now knew what he could do.
"Angel, what's everybody else doing?" he asked the spiderlike porn star whom he now officially considered a friend.
Charlie and everyone else were hanging out in the lobby chatting amongst one another. Angel and Lincoln soon entered the room. The boy cleared his throat before getting everyone's attention.
"Excuse me, everyone!"
Everyone stopped what they were doing and gave their undivided attention to their youngest resident.
"Is something wrong, Lincoln?" a concerned Charlie asked.
"I've been thinking about this whole chosen one thing lately," Lincoln explained. "I've spent most of my life helping my sisters achieve greatness, but I never felt like I was going to amount to anything myself. But then I find myself in a situation I never thought would happen. If any one of my sisters would've told me I would wind up in Hell of all places and work as a bellhop for a rehabilitation hotel run by the princess herself, I would have kissed that sister on the mouth." Lincoln paused to give a disgusted glare to the readers. "Don't even think about it, you sickos!" he threatened them before resuming his speech to the hotel residents. "Then I hear I might be this prophesized person in a prophecy and now I don't know what to think. I've spent the whole day asking everyone at this hotel what they think in order to get some clarification of how I should handle this. But after all that, I believe I now know what I must do. I have some responsibilities to perform. You understand right?"
Niffty smiled and nodded her head in response. But after a moment, her smile faded and she shook her head with a confused expression on her face.
Charlie and Pentious looked just as confused as Niffty while Vaggie, Alastor, Husk, and Angel Dusk smiled as they genuinely understood where the boy was going with this.
"What I'm saying is: I've decided… to accept my role as the One!"
At hearing that, the biggest smile thus far formed on the Princess of Hell's face. Realizing what was about to happen next, Vaggie rushed over to Lincoln and covered the boy's ears as her girlfriend let out an ear-piercing squeal of joy. The sound was so loud it echoed throughout the entire hotel. Angel, Pentious, Husk, and Alastor all covered their ears while Niffty didn't and let herself get knocked out by the high-pitched noise. Windows cracked and Husk's bottle shattered to pieces. Vaggie cringed as the sound echoed in her ears. Finally, Charlie calmed down and the noise stopped.
"You okay, Vaggie?" a concerned Lincoln asked.
"Don't worry," she assured. "This isn't the first time I've experienced this."
"Oh, Lincoln!" an excited Charlie exclaimed swooping in and pulling the boy into a tight lung-squeezing hug. "I'm so proud and HAPPY!"
"Glad I could make you feel that way," a blue-faced Lincoln managed to wheeze out. "Can I have some air now?"
"Oh, of course," Charlie replied releasing him from her grip and allowing him to breathe. She gave him a kiss on the cheek before setting him back down.
"Although… it would be nice if you guys could help out a little," the white-haired boy asked looking up at Charlie and Vaggie with pleading puppy dog eyes. "Because I really don't know exactly what I'm supposed to do to be honest."
Both Charlie and Vaggie looked at each other for a moment before smiling and nodding in unison. Then they turned their attention back down to Lincoln.
"Of course, Sweetie," Charlie replied in a sweet, motherly tone.
"We've got your back," Vaggie replied reassuringly.
"Alright!" Lincoln exclaimed with excitement. "It's time to put Operation: Redeem our Souls, Get into Heaven, End the Exterminations, and Think of a Shorter Nickname for this Operation into action!"
There was a long pause as everyone stared bewildered at the boy before Niffty started cheering. Sir Pentious and Alastor began applauding. Husk gave a supportive smile and a thumbs up while taking a swig from a bottle. Angel ruffled the kid's hair before grabbing him around the waist and lifting him up into the air for all to gaze upon.
Both Charlie and Vaggie watched with happy and satisfied smiles as the other residents of the hotel expressed their praise and gratitude to the young human boy who had agreed to help them in any way he could. Both knew this new task that had been placed on his shoulders wouldn't be easy and some still had their doubts, but they would do their best to support and help him figure out what he needed to do. Like a family.
I would like to give credit to the person who goes by the alias of Tokei for the ideas for Niffty's past.
