Ranma 1/2: Demon Dating


2:30 PM
NERIMA, JAPAN

"Remember, boys, don't say anything that could anger Tendo," explained Genma as he walked through the streets with his sons. "Besides, being a powerful oni, he could end up doing something really unpleasant!"

"Unpleasant how, exactly?" asked Ranma.

"For one, he could use his powers to summon lightning!" Genma exclaimed. "And fry us to nothing! Or he could use his strength to crush us like bugs!"

"So why exactly are we going to meet this demon guy?" inquired Kenma.

"Because a promise was made!" Genma declared. "And a promise has to be kept between two parties!"

"So…what did this promise entail?" asked Kenma.

Genma began to sweat a little. "Er…why, it was a promise of good fortune and great wealth!" he blurted. "And all I had to do was bring my sons to meet his daughters!"

"This demon guy has daughters?" Ranma queried. "So, are they oni, too?"

"He didn't say," replied Genma.

"...then you can forget it," said Kenma. "I wasn't born to be somebody's lunch! I know what oni are capable of!"

"Is that right, then?" asked Genma. "Well, then I suppose you won't get to take in any of the wealth. I'll give some to Ranma, and none to you!"

Kenma gave his so-called father a withering side-eye glance. Genma was practically sweating rivers, hoping his second-born son would believe what he'd told him.

Finally, Kenma relented. "...oh, alright," he replied. "But if we get killed, I blame you."

"Great! Let's get going!" the fat man said while wiping the sweat from his brow.

And so, the trek continued.


MEANWHILE…

A mailman rode down the street on his bicycle, carrying a postcard. As he stopped outside the Tendo house, a feeling of unease came over him. Something about this place just filled him with an overwhelming sense that he shouldn't be here. Like walking through a graveyard at night, or something…

"Oh! Is that my mail, then?" came Soun's voice, jutting the mailman from his thoughts. He turned to see a middle-aged, mustached man with dark hair coming over.

"Uh…yes, Mr. Tendo!" the mailman replied. "Say, Mr. Tendo?"

"Yes?"

"...you ever get to sensing something…strange around here?" the mailman inquired. "Like…something isn't right, or there's some sort of presence around?"

"Hmmm, I can't say that I have," responded Soun.

The mailman shrugged as he handed off the postcard. "Well, here you are. Have a nice day."

Soun waved to him as he pedaled away, and then headed back inside. Once he'd shut the door behind him, he began to change and shift; his tan skin turned a dark shade of purple, his body doubled in size and height, a pair of tusks grew from his mouth, and in his other hand manifested…a kanabo.

"Girls!" he bellowed. "Come down at once! We need to talk!"

One by one, three young women came downstairs. First, there came a Jorogumo with brown hair and a kindly smile. In case you don't know, a Jorogumo resembles a human woman with the lower half of a spider. "Hello, Father. You wanted to talk to me?" she inquired.

"Actually, Kasumi, I just wanted you and your sisters down here for the second announcement," Soun responded. "This first one concerns Nabiki."

"Oh, my…" Kasumi placed a hand to her mouth. "I do hope it isn't anything too serious."

"No, it's not exactly serious…just important," the Tendo patriarch explained.

Next, down came a young woman with chin-length brown hair in a bob cut; she had a pair of horns jutting from her skull, as well as lavender-colored skin, with black wings jutting from her back. "Hey, Daddy…what's all the fuss over?" she asked.

Soun crossed his arms as he stared at his second-born daughter. "You ought to know, Nabiki," he replied. "You've been neglecting your efforts to stay hidden, haven't you?"

"Hey! It's not my fault that mortals are so eager to prove themselves that they willingly give up their souls," shrugged the succubus.

But Soun wasn't having it. "That being said, it doesn't change the fact you could put us all at risk," he said. "If this gets out, it's only a matter of time before some hot-shot demon killer comes calling. And then? There goes our whole way of life! You need to be more discreet!"

"Oh, alright," Nabiki rolled her eyes. "I'll try and cut down."

"You won't try, young lady," chastised Soun. "You'll do."

Nabiki exhaled. "FINE, daddy, I'll cut down," she responded. "...but I am NOT giving up Kuno's soul contract. Oh, the things I can make him do with this in my possession~"

A wicked smile formed on her lips as she imagined having the wanna-be samurai at her beck and call…and to think, he had declared he would give anything to become a mighty samurai. How could she resist? So, she'd granted his request…and in return, his soul was hers for the taking. And that had been a year ago. Every time she thought about it, she chuckled.

"Now that that's out of the way, could someone go get Akane?" asked Soun.

"Hang on, I'm coming!" called a voice from upstairs, followed by the stomping of boots.

"That was faster than usual." Nabiki observed as her younger sister skid to a halt once she reached the bottom floor. Standing before them was a young imp girl with long dark hair, and mahogany-colored skin. [Design-wise, she's more-or-less based on Millie from Helluva Boss as a template.]

"Hmmm…I thought you'd be outside training." Soun said, slightly perplexed.

"I just got back in from my jog," said Akane.

Soun was practically pale. "You didn't go without your bracelet, did you?!" he sputtered.

"It was a quick jog so I didn't think I needed it," insisted Akane. "Anyways, what's this all about?"

"Oh, right!" Soun exclaimed. "I almost forgot…I've gotten a postcard from someone who promised me something. An old friend, in fact!"

The girls looked over as Soun put down a picture that was taped to the postcard. It showed a bespectacled, middle-aged man with a durag, along with two teenage boys.

"His name's Genma Saotome," explained Soun. "And he promised to give one of you his son's soul. Of course…he never expected to have two sons."

"Oooo, a new soul to collect~" purred Nabiki. "Better yet, two strapping young men…and a fat old geezer. I guess Kasumi can make a meal of him or something."

"Nabiki, I expect you to keep your impulses in check," her father sternly warned. "Just…play it smart, okay?"

Nabiki rolled her eyes. "Yes, daddy," she replied.

"And Akane, try not to be as abrasive as you normally are," added Soun.

"Yes, Dad," Akane replied. "I'll show them we're nothing to be trifled with!"

"And Kasumi, just…act natural," Soun told his eldest daughter.

Kasumi gave a bow. "Just leave it to me!" she responded.

And at that moment, there was a knock on the door.

"That must be them!" Soun exclaimed as he changed back to his mortal form. "Get ready, girls!"

The girls all assumed their human disguises, as Soun went to the door. "Ah, Saotome, old friend! We've been waiting for you!" he exclaimed.

"Ah, good afternoon, Tendo!" Genma replied. "You're looking quite well!"

"And looking very…well-fed," Soun observed, looking Genma up and down.

"Hey, it hasn't been easy!" insisted Genma. "Finding food isn't exactly a snap….especially when you're on the road! Not to mention, taking care of two sons!"

"Sons…ah, yes! The boys!" Soun smiled. "My daughters are positively anxious to meet the young men. And I'm anxious to see if you'll live up to your promise."

"What? You thought that I'd forgotten?" Genma laughed boisterously. "How utterly ridiculous!"

"Hmmm…it's good to know that you remembered," Soun said with a skeptical glance. "Well, come on in."

"Don't mind if I do!" the fat man said as he stepped through the doorway, with Ranma and Kenma following behind.

"Hey, Ken. Did you notice something…off about this place?" the older Saotome brother asked while smelling the air.

Kenma looked at his brother and gave a sniff. "...off like, how?" he inquired.

"Like there's something fake about Mr. Tendo over there," said Ranma.

Kenma sniffed the air a few more times. "Now that you mention it, kinda," he replied. "I'm not sure what it is. But didn't the old man mention something about demonic powers earlier?"

"Yeah, but…I don't buy it," shrugged Ranma. "Still, demons or not, they are kinda sketchy. Just keep your eyes open for anything suspicious."

"Right, bro!" Kenma declared.

Soun led the three of them into the living room, where the Tendo sisters were seated. Akane seemed to be sizing them both up, while Nabiki was eying them in a sultry manner. Kasumi sat in the middle, a warm smile on her face.

Of course, that made her the most suspicious of them all.

Ranma wasn't exactly sure what to think about the stares, but Kenma was feeling a bit nervous. After all, the last time he'd gotten this sort of attention from a girl, she'd turned out to be one of those hopping vampires.

"So, I hear the two of you are aspiring martial artists," said Soun. "Akane is also interested in martial arts."

"Is that right, then?" asked Ranma. "...good to know, at least."

"How about we do a little sparring session?" asked Akane.

"What's at stake?" Ranma asked.

"Well…" Akane pondered as her father gave her a look that said don't make it too obvious. "How about this? If I win, you have to take me out to lunch tomorrow."

"Hmm, alright then," Ranma shrugged.

"Speaking of lunch, you must be absolutely famished from walking all the way here!" chirruped Kasumi.

"You think so?" inquired Kenma, before his stomach rumbled. "...on second thought, I won't deny that some food would really hit the spot."

The sound of a hungry stomach lit Kasumi's soul ablaze with joy. "In that case, name your favorite foods," she responded. "And I'll gladly make them!"

Kenma grinned. "Cheeseburgers, noodles, and shrimp!" he exclaimed.

"What sort of noodles?" inquired Kasumi.

"Lo mein, udon, ramen, soba, vermicelli!" Kenma exclaimed.

"And how would you like that shrimp?" Kasumi replied.

"Grilled, fried and breaded!" the younger brother gushed.

Kasumi giggled. "Such a big appetite for someone so young!" she complimented. Which will mean a far more sumptuous meal... "I'll have to make a run to the market."

"I could come and help," said Kenma.

"Oh no, you stay here. You're our guests!" Kasumi replied as she gave Kenma the sort of look that one's mother might give them. "It's my duty to treat our guests and make sure they're full and happy."

"Are you sure?" asked Kenma. "I mean, I don't exactly have anything to do. It wouldn't even be a problem! Besides, Ranma's gonna be busy with his sparring match, and it'll be so boooo-ring!"

"Well, he'll probably be hungry after his sparring session," replied Kasumi as she got her pocketbook and basket. "...in the meantime, perhaps you should spend some time with Nabiki? She isn't busy."

Kenma turned and looked over at the bob-haired brunette again; she noticed he was staring at her, and gave him a playful wink.

"...well, alright," he responded. "...maybe I could show her my drawings."

"There we go, that's the spirit!" Kasumi smiled as she gave him a playful pat on the head. "Now, I'd better get a move on if I'm going to have the food ready later!"

"Alrighty then," Kenma shrugged, while Kasumi headed out the door. "So, Nabiki. What do you like to do?"

Nabiki shrugged. "Well, I'm a bit of a shutterbug so I do photography…mostly for business reasons, of course."

"Is that right?" mused Kenma. "Well…alright. Maybe I could see some of your photos?"

"Sure! I should warn you, though," the succubus advised. "They're a little…explicit."

"Yeah? Well, I guess that should be fine," replied Kenma. "It'll at least make things interesting."

"Here they are!" Nabiki announced as she opened up a big folder, while Kenma peered over her shoulder. Inside the folder was a collection of lewd, provocative photos of both men and women. Kenma was, to say the least, surprised. "...looks like you weren't kidding," he said.

"Funny. I thought you'd be more shocked," the demoness observed.

"How do you know I'm not?" Kenma replied. "I'm just kinda curious. Like, how do you get these snapshots, anyway?"

"It's…a trade secret," said Nabiki. "What about you, Kenma? What do you like to do?"

"Well…I like to draw," Kenma responded. "Especially since there's very few places to get manga. It's not much, but I need a distraction from my life."

"Ya know, there's a lot of money to be made in art," said Nabiki. "...perhaps I could see what you've got?"

Kenma thought for a few seconds. "Well…it's only fair," he replied. "You showed me yours, so I'll show you mine."

Nabiki smirked to herself. Sooner or later, that'll have TWO meanings.

So Kenma brought out his sketchbook, and opened it up while Nabiki took a look inside. "Wow! These are pretty nice!" she remarked, impressed by both his landscapes, AND the way he could draw people. Granted, they weren't exactly professional-quality, but they were far from just mere scribbles upon the paper.

"Thanks! They won't be winning awards anytime soon, but I'm glad you like them," the younger Saotome brother said, a little sheepish.

"Still, they're very nice," Nabiki responded. "Just stick with me, Ken, and I'll make you a star." she said as she wrapped her arm around Kenma's shoulder.

Now Kenma was awestruck. "Me? A star?" he asked. "...I never thought something like that was possible! I figured Big Bro would get his own dojo, but…I never really considered what'd happen to me. Apart from my drawings, martial arts has been the one major presence in my life."

A poor, directionless young man. If left alone, someone could…gasp!...take advantage of him! Just the opportunity she was looking for.

"Oh, don't you worry about a thing, Kenma," Nabiki said as she got closer to the boy. "I can give you anything your little heart desires."

"R-really?" the monkey boy asked.

"Oh, absolutely!" Nabiki replied. This is turning out to be a lot easier than I thought. I think I'm gonna hold onto this one for a little while…at least, until I take his soul.

I don't CARE if Kasumi is the eldest, she's not eating this one.


MEANWHILE, IN THE DOJO...

At one side, Akane stood, dressed in an all white Gi with a black belt around her waist.

Meanwhile, Ranma stood at the other end, still dressed in his chinese-style clothes.

"Don't hold back, okay?" Akane asked.

But as she looked over, she saw that Ranma was just…standing there, as casual as could be. Not taking a fighting stance or anything.

What the…it looks like he's just leaving himself wide open to attack! thought Akane, perplexed. She thought no more of it, and charged forward, throwing a punch…which was swiftly dodged with ease.

Ranma was still in the same position as before. "You wanna try again?" he asked.

"That was just a lucky dodge," the tomboy said before throwing a hook kick which Ranma also dodged.

Punch—dodged.

Another punch—ducked.

Left punch—darted.

Chin punch—dipped.

"If that's the case," said Ranma. "Then I must be really lucky!"

Akane was getting visibly frustrated…so much so, that she neglected to notice that her bracelet was slipping off of her wrist.

"Grrr…YOU WON'T MAKE A FOOL OUT OF ME!" she roared, lurching forward with another furious punch.

Of course, Ranma dodged that as well—he backflipped over Akane's head, and lightly tapped her on the back of her head.

As the punch hit the wall, her bracelet lurched off…and her disguise dissolved.

"Looks like I got you—" smiled Ranma, before he noticed Akane's little change. "UUUUAAAAAAAAGH!"

Guess I was right to be suspicious after all…


NEXT TIME: Secrets revealed, and explanations are made.