AUTHORS NOTES:

Slyksylva - Ooh… I hope you like this chapter then ;-)

Archer1eye - Just a taste. Shard has been missing for so long, and I'd only ever shown the interactions between her and Sharein. I love rounding her out like this a bit better. There might even be a bit more of it before the shit hits the fan ;)

Chapter 57

11th Day of Middle Spring 768 n.c

"Sometimes," Alladrial said to me, once he had managed to separate me from Shard… and himself from Malkarov, "I wonder if Malkarov is the right master for you or you are the right apprentice for him. You seem both as reckless as the other."

We were both sitting down in the chairs down in the sitting room, prior to my lessons starting for the day. Malkarov was upstairs showing off his rune schemes to Shard.

"I wasn't being reckless!" I appealed, trying to defend myself.

"Did you think about the consequences of dedicating yourself?" He asked, but before I could answer he continued with more questions, "What you would do while you were blind, how long you would be blind for? Did you think about the risk you were taking by doing this?"

He paused then and I took a moment to think through the questions that he had asked, "No, not really. I mean, I knew what I was doing. I just didn't consider the consequences to be meaningful enough to balance out the rewards."

"And that," the elf said, "is exactly Malkarov's problem as well… well, aside from the fact that sometimes he just doesn't think at all, as well. What does Shard mean to you, what value does your relationship have?"

I didn't even need to consider the question, "everything, she's my everything."

He continued, "neither of you do anything by halves, everything is either all in or nothing, isn't it? I wonder sometimes whether that isn't unique to you, but just a general trait of humans. Listen to me Sharein, I'm not saying that she isn't important to you, or even vitally important. But she should not be everything to you. Because if she is everything to you… you leave nothing for yourself. She can be half, she can be most, she can be almost all; but she should not be everything. You need to leave room for your wants, for your needs and for your growth. You need to leave room for you, because you matter… you matter just as much as she does."

I frowned. Shard was worth everything. Everything was the most that I could give her and she deserved no less than that. Everything was a symbol of my love for her.

Alladrial said something that made me pause, "keeping some of yourself for yourself, doesn't mean you love her less."

Was he reading my mind? How?

Something about my expression must have shown him how accurate his statement was for he laughed, "you're wondering how I knew that?"

I nodded slowly and he continued, "I was exactly where you are now, with my first love. I poured all of myself into it and it hurt all the more when it ended."

'No,' I thought, 'that's not the same! Was his first love a goddess? No!' I tried to school my features despite how miffed I was getting, 'And besides, we're not going to end!'

He laughed, which just made me more angry, "It is advice Sharein, freely offered. You may accept or decline it as you wish. I just don't want to see you getting hurt, or wasting your potential. For what it's worth, what little I've seen… I like her and I think you two might be very good for each other."

With that, any feelings of anger that were brewing dissipated.

He let out another laugh, "we must work on that silence enchantment though. I can understand Shard, but I have no idea how you are still able to walk today!"

His laughter receded upstairs and I was left by myself in the sitting room. Surrounded by books that I couldn't read. I called him a nasty word in my head, but realised with a start that he wasn't an inconsiderate person. I knew that I was capable of getting myself upstairs. By just leaving like that was he showing me that he knew that I was capable as well? I stood up and strode to the stairs, walking up confidently, counting each step and trailing my fingers along the walls until I reached the fourth floor.

I heard them arguing long before I reached the landing.

"... you can't use them together! They'll explode!" Came the voice of Malkarov, showing a lot of incredulity and a hint of frustration.

"So?" Came the retort of my love.

"So? So?" Malkarov shouted, "There's no telling what that explosion of magic would do to whoever set it off, let alone anyone nearby!"

"No," Shard said calmly, "that's why you use a ward scheme to modify the explosion."

"What?" Malkarov exclaimed and then started explaining slowly, "you can't connect two opposite runes. They are opposite for a reason, magic won't accept it."

Shard sighed, "I'm not advising you to connect them by themselves, or just randomly connect them to a ward scheme like that. They are different runes that powers use to make artifacts, but there's no reason why the concept wouldn't work here. You channel a small amount of magic from the… power bank into the two runes containing it with Ya, then allow some of it to come out back into the power bank using Ay, Fe, Sa and An. A small amount of magic will go in, multiply dramatically then feed itself back into the power bank. Then you use another scheme to modify the amount of multiplication of power and a third one to feed back out that modified power into the rest of the ward scheme."

"That…" Malkarov stuttered, "that's insane! Crazy! You just can't do that!"

"Sure you can," Shard replied, "it's exactly what Tenebrae did when she created the Cloak of Darkness."

"Oh," Shard continued, sounding like she'd just remembered something, "and the Shadow Daggers, come to think of it."

"But, that just doesn't make any sense!" Malkarov complained.

"It's magic, it doesn't make any sense unless you make it," Shard retorted, "just think about it. You'll see that it makes sense."

"I shall never be able to learn from him if you frustrate him to death my love," I said as I made the last step onto the landing.

"If that happened, we could always bring him back as a Lich," Shard replied with a laugh.

"You are not to bring me back as a Lich, no way, never!" Malkarov yelled.

I heard Alladrial's laughter then, somewhere beyond Shard and Malkarov.

"Why are you getting so worked up in any case?" I asked. I had followed along with the conversation and had a good idea what Shard was describing.

"She insists that we don't need to be sacrificing as much magic as we do when we enchant, that by using opposing runes in a particular way we can… amplify the magic we put into the power bank," Malkarov explained, almost scoffing as he did so.

"Why are you getting worked up then?" I asked, "that sounds like a good thing."

Alladrial began laughing all the louder at that and Malkarov spluttered. I smiled widely to let him know that I was just taking a jab at him and he calmed down… eventually.

Shard excused herself so that I could continue my lessons, with a kiss and a promise to return after dinner.

"You can join us for dinner if you like," Malkarov invited, "Alladrial has promised to cook for us tonight."

"Thank you," Shard said to him, "I will look forward to it then. You will let me know when it is time for dinner, my love?"

"Of course," I promised, "I'll see you soon."

Lessons consisted mostly of Malkarov reading sections to me from various books, taking breaks every paragraph or so to repeat it in his own words and sometimes with a slightly different focus and more information. He would then quiz me on the information he provided.

Mostly, his lessons revolved around enchanting and rituals and the rules of each. He made a point to go over the prohibition against combining opposite runes once again, but a hint of doubt tinted his usually confident tone.

We took a break for lunch, which consisted of a delicious loaf of bread that we had buttered. A selection of three different cheeses and some fruits and berries. Alladrial offered some elvish wine to wash it down with. He had brought enough for lunch and dinner. Malkarov warned me to be careful with it and I took his warning to heart. A sip of the elvish drink was enough to give me an idea of it. The liquid was light, almost seeming to evaporate on my tongue and it's flavour was very subtle and complex. It almost seemed to change constantly; the blend of berries and fruits, honey and spices swirling about in an ever changing melody. The flavour flowed through my mouth into my nose, infusing every intake of breath with the smells.

I declared it, "the most delicious thing I have ever tasted!" Much to Alladrial's approval and Malkarov's disgust.

"It's nice," Malkarov said, "I'll grant you, but it's nothing compared to a good Easthavian ale."

This statement led to a good natured argument that I got the feeling was merely a continuation of one long ago started. Their hearts weren't in it and the good natured ribbing did nothing to disguise the love there.

My afternoon lessons were on potions theory, which I found fascinating. The mixtures of different ingredients to create different effects was very similar to that of enchanting and actual spell casting. I realised that everything involved in wizardry was exactly as Shar described: forcing the chaos of magic into specific effects using a formula or language to create the desired effect. Whether this language was written (for enchantments and rituals), spoken (for spells and rituals) or cooked together (for potions) was irrelevant. They were all just ways of forcing magic to do what you wanted, with an outside sacrifice to stop you from becoming the sacrifice.

I called out to Shard mentally when it came time for dinner. The smells that greeted us were amazing. I half wondered whether he had just spilled elvish wine around the table as a practical joke until Shard started feeding me.

Alladrial explained the nature of elvish cuisine, that it usually consisted of small quantities of many differently prepared foods. Some foods were not safe to eat unless cooked in a particular way and were usually the showcase of any meal. As Shard fed me each one, Alladrial explained what they were and how they were prepared. I had a sip of elvish wine between each dish, which Alladrial explained was the traditional way to eat an elvish dinner.

"The fungi or mushroom Eladar'Merani grows underneath the highest branches of the great Eladar trees in the forest of Kaz Sarion. It is soaked for ten days, covered in elvish wine before it is brought to the boil until the level of wine drops underneath the cap. Then it is left to cool and served."

The mushroom tasted delicious, the perfect combination of earthiness and fruity. It was small, barely a mouthful on it's own, almost like freshly sprouted grass mushroom.

"The fresh, and only fresh, leaves of the Barak'liil vine are poisonous if eaten directly. But these have been fermented with vinegared wine for a year. This removes the natural bitterness of the leaves but contains their flavour."

The texture of the mushy leaf reminded me of cooked servach leaf, but it's flavour was significantly different. There remained a hint of bitterness, but the vinegar made it significantly piquant.

Shard held a bowl to my lips. It's contents were sweet and warm, thick and a little lumpy. It had a nutty sort of flavour that I immediately loved.

"We call this Amarilla. It's a fermented drink made from a special type of grain, Sis grain, that grows in the flood plains near the coast in Kaz Sarion. This grain is also in the next bowl and is a staple dish."

The next bowl Shard fed me from contained the sis grain, it was soft but each grain retained its original shape in a manner of speaking. It did not have much of a significant flavour though but it was very filling.

"This is Sari'al'spar. Green spear, you might call it. It's a green shoot that grows up with a spear like point that if left to grow will burst into leaves and eventually a flower. But it's picked just before that point and baked in a mixture of butter and lemon."

The Green-spear was about nine inches long, but delicious with each bite. The nuttiness of the cooked butter mixed with the sharp, tangy sourness of the lemon mixed perfectly with the earthy flavour of the vegetable.

"Lastly, I suppose you would call these potatoes, they are Eladar'Yorsha. These are slightly different to yours though, with an orange flesh and sweeter taste. They grow beneath the Eladar trees and these ones have been boiled. They are sprinkled with Eladar'Yema, a fungi that grows on the roots of the Eladar tree."

They had the consistency of boiled potatoes, but as described had an additional sweetness with flavour by themselves that could almost be described as carrot like. However the Yema sprinkled on top added a salty earthiness that combined together perfectly.

When we had finished I thanked Alladrial profusely, so did Shard and Malkarov. Alladrial took it all with a modest grace that I wished I could emulate. We stayed at the dinner table until we had finished the bottles of wine that Alladrial had set out and I definitely needed Shard's assistance to get back down to my room once we were finished. The effect it had on me was very disorienting, almost putting my limbs to sleep such that my legs weren't doing what I wanted them to and I was finding it difficult to think properly.

Shard helped me to get undressed and I may have responded to that act with quite a bit of forwardness. Why waste nakedness? We curled up together and fell asleep and I had quite forgotten what was going to wake me up before sunrise.