Chapter 10 - People Are Endlessly Fascinating

Nathan punched at his pillow in frustration as he lay on the lumpy mattress in the Airstream. He couldn't seem to get Paige's face out of his mind along with Happy's advice that perhaps he should be the one to pursue her, not Walter. Nathan hadn't spoken to anyone about her words. What would he say without raining the wrath of every member of Scorpion down upon him or even worse, bringing it up to Walter and destroying the friendship they had built?

It hadn't seemed as if the two men had much in common when they met on the submarine all those months ago. Walter had appeared arrogant and irritating. But over time, since Nathan had joined Scorpion on a temporary basis, he had learned how similar they were; how important duty and loyalty were to both of them; how highly they prized devotion to ideals larger than themselves. But even more than that, how much Nathan sincerely enjoyed Walter's company, his quirks and his offbeat way of looking at the world. How could he jeopardize that?

And yet, there was something. Something he couldn't quite describe that still drew him to the team liaison. And because of that he simply couldn't put her out of his mind. He covered his face with the abused pillow, relishing the darkness for a few moments. Perhaps if he and Walter could spend time together, he could find clarity. It had been a while since they'd played GO. These last few days it almost felt as if Walter had been trying to avoid him as much as Nathan had been trying to avoid Walter.

Pushing the pillow aside, Nathan decided to remedy that. He exited the trailer and called out from the foot of the stairs to the loft, "Walter," No answer was forthcoming, but he could hear the other man moving around in the loft. Determined not to be put off, Nathan continued calling out every few steps, as he ascended to Walter's living quarters.

Once Nathan reached the second floor, he saw Walter typing intensely at his computer, conspicuously refusing to meet Nathan's eyes even as he continued to call Walter's name. Nathan crossed the expanse of the loft's living area until he was standing directly in front of him.

Walter had no choice but to look at the ensign or physically turn his body away and confirm that he was indeed ignoring Nathan. Refusing to acknowledge that he had been avoiding Nathan for days, Walter dragged his gaze reluctantly to meet Nathan's. "Is there something important that requires my attention? I'm coding a security patch for a client. Can it wait?"

Both men knew that Walter could code the patch in his sleep. In addition, the business owner wasn't expecting the work to be completed for two more weeks. Scorpion had requested an extended time frame in their contract due to being approached at the same time by an international banking conglomerate for a bid on a large database cleanup that the team had been hoping to land. If they could secure the job, it would necessitate pushing the smaller security coding job back. Unfortunately, they hadn't secured the larger job so the entire team had time on their hands.

"You and I both know there's no rush on that security patch."

Walter made a noise of irritation in the back of his throat, but he didn't deny Nathan's statement. He knew Nathan was only stating facts.

"It just feels like it's been too long since we played GO. I've missed our conversations and honing my tactics and sharpening my strategy and just plain beating you. So what do you say, how about a game or two tonight?"

Walter studied Nathan carefully looking for any hint of artifice. He wondered, not for the first time, why such an effortlessly social person would be the least bit interested in spending time with a curmudgeonly megalomaniac like him. Walter had always known that he struggled with social interactions. He'd had the multiple black eyes from his school days in Ireland to prove it. Though he hadn't been physically assaulted as an adult nearly as often, he knew he still irritated those around him. He didn't mean to. He just wasn't always certain how not to rub people the wrong way, even those who professed to be his friends seemed to mostly only tolerate him.

But Nathan had actually seemed to enjoy his company and Walter felt free to be more himself with Nathan than he had ever had with anyone except Megan. It was one of the things he missed most about her now that she was gone, the feeling of being wholly himself with another human being. He knew why Megan did it, at least in part: she was his sister. It was her duty. It was her job to take care of him. But Nathan, he was simply a random stranger who had crossed paths with Scorpion and now was part of the team. He was now Walter's friend, likely his best friend. The question was: why? Walter was rude, arrogant, condescending, and thoughtless. And those were often the kindest ways other people described him.

Walter stood up from his desk and crossed to Ferret Bueller's cage, removing the animal, to try to use him as a distraction. However, Walter wasn't quite sure who he was distracting, himself from Nathan's invitation or Nathan from actually following through with playing the game. "I haven't had the chance to spend quality time with Ferret in several days. He is no doubt feeling the effects of low stimulation. I don't think I'll be able to play with you tonight, Nathan. Perhaps another time?" He felt as if Nathan could see right through his excuse.

Nathan didn't say a word, just moved to the crate of ferret toys in the corner. Once there, he set up the safety pen and tossed in a few of Ferret Bueller's favorites. Of course, Nathan knew which ones the animal gravitated toward. Was there anything the man didn't pay attention to when it came to interactions, whether human or animal? He took the ferret from Walter's firm grasp. The rodent practically leaped from Walter's arms to Nathan's. Traitor, Walter thought bitterly.

Ferret Bueller chittered happily and climbed up on Nathan's shoulder. He stroked him affectionately for a few moments before depositing him inside the contained safety of the pen. He put a few treats into one of Ferret's favorite puzzles before turning his attention back to Walter. "Now can we play?"

Every excuse Walter came up with, Nathan had an answer for. Walter, even with his 197 IQ, couldn't find a way to get out of it. Finally, he gave up and agreed to play just so the evening would end and he would finally be alone to wallow in his discomfort and another emotion he couldn't even bear to name. An emotion he knew Toby would see coming a mile away … envy. Walter envied how easily Nathan interacted with the team, with the people they helped, even with pizza delivery drivers and museum curators.

Nathan easily beat Walter in the first game, and when he saw his victory was inevitable in the second game as well, he pushed the board aside. "Hey, what's up, Boss? Your heart isn't in the game tonight. It was next to impossible to even get you to play and now it's like you don't even want to win. That's not like you. Something on your mind?"

"I'm just feeling tired after the case today," Walter evaded. "I'm having difficulty focusing."

"That's a complete pile of bull poop and you and I both know it. The only thing that wears you down is failure and since the team didn't fail today, that's just an excuse. I know you like the facts, so why don't you try it again, this time how about you try actually stating facts instead of poorly thought-out justifications?"

Nathan's thinly veiled insult pushed Walter's control of his frustration to near breaking. "Fine. I know that I have a far superior intellect, but I hate how easily you relate to and connect with normal people. You even connect easily with the other geniuses, who are notoriously difficult to deal with, by the way." Walter moved to the ferret enclosure and picked up the animal, stroking him softly, trying to appear as if he weren't irritated by the whole situation.

Nathan smothered a smile, he understood Walter's discomfort. He remembered the feeling all too well, watching his grandfather effortlessly connecting with people while he had been the awkward outsider as a teen. He completely empathized with Walter. "And it's less annoying when it's Paige because she's a normal."

Walter nodded unconsciously, still stroking Ferret Bueller.

"Not even in the same league since she's not an intellectual genius and since I apparently am, it riles your competitive streak. You always need to be the most genius-y genius in the room and in this aspect of the enabled experience you're not."

"Something like that," Walter muttered grudgingly.

Nathan couldn't hold it in any longer as he chuckled good-naturedly. "I'll let you in on a little secret. I wasn't always great with people either. In fact, I was mostly a horror show. I was shy and withdrawn when I was a kid, and when I was twelve and my parents were killed in a car accident, my two-year-old brother, Corey, and I were shipped halfway across the country to live with grandparents I'd only met a handful of times. I was downright hostile to them and to everyone I met. I was most definitely not Mister Popularity."

Walter was intrigued. Nathan's description of his relationship with his grandfather had always sounded exceptionally close. And he had never heard anything before about a Nathan who wasn't anything but likable and easy to talk to. He wondered how Nathan had made the journey from angry preteen to the confident and charming man he had become. Walter put Ferret Bueller back into his cage and carefully made sure the door latch was secure, while Nathan watched from the table where they were playing. Once the animal was safely put away for the night, Walter returned to his seat, eager to hear more of the temporary Homeland intern's story.

Nathan settled himself more comfortably on the rickety chair and continued. "Those early years with Nana and Grandad I truly did my best to make their lives miserable, but Nana's endless patience with a sad and angry teenager and Grandad's willingness to teach through example how a man, a real man, treated those around him saved me from becoming the self-destructive lost boy I easily could have become."

Walter nodded. He was familiar with the self-destructive tendencies of geniuses who didn't have the support of families who took the time to try to understand both the gift and the burden of being intellectually enabled. He thought of his own childhood in Callan and the pain and isolation he felt there.

Nathan leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees, covering his face with his hands for a few seconds, and let out a long breath. After a moment he lifted his head and met Walter's gaze unsteadily. "My only real regret in life is that it took losing Nana when I was sixteen to finally snap me out of my cycle of anger and self-pity completely."

"You talk about Corey fairly often and how proud you are of him, and you have shared several anecdotes about your formative years with your grandfather. You've told us that your grandparents raised you and your brother after your parents died, but you almost never speak about your grandmother. Is that why? Because of your regret?"

Nathan sighed heavily. "Yes. She went to her grave after fighting cancer for over a year along with dealing with me and my attitude, and she never knew how much I loved her. How much it meant to me that she never stopped trying to make sure I knew how deeply she loved me. When she passed, it broke my heart, but more than that, when I saw how it broke my grandad's heart to lose the love of his life, I knew I couldn't make it any more difficult for him than it needed to be. There he was with a sixteen- and a six-year-old to raise on his own. That's when he retired from the San Diego PD and became both mom and dad to Corey, and my best friend and mentor. We would go hiking, fishing, camping, play sports, everything. I learned to love the great outdoors from my grandad. That's where I learned about the power of being able to sit in silence with my thoughts. It's also where he taught me everything I ever really needed to know in life. Specifically, how to relate to people, how to make it my superpower."

Walter quirked an eyebrow at Nathan's choice of words. Nathan grinned. "Grandad's words. He told me everyone needs to feel special in some way, to have their own superpower. Connecting with people could become mine."

"He sounds quite unusual."

"You have no idea," Nathan grinned, "The first thing to know about my grandad is that he truly loves people. He approaches every person he meets with the mindset that they are endlessly fascinating and there is something he can learn from them. That's really kind of an inborn trait that he always had, but I found over time that I was able to cultivate it and develop it. So it doesn't need to be natural, it can be learned. It's all in the attitude."

Walter looked skeptically at Nathan but motioned for him to continue.

"Then, second is the more active role in how he taught me to interact with people. As he learned about the other person, he would take a thread of something he was interested in and weave it into a thread of something the other person was interested in and soon they were interested together. Or sometimes it was even easier and they enjoyed the same thing. Occasionally he would meet someone and Grandad's interests didn't overlap with theirs at all and then he made the choice to be interested in the thing they love just for the chance to watch someone he cared about talk about or enjoy something they love, which would bring him joy."

"Isn't that kind of fake? Just a way of manipulating people?" Walter asked not unkindly.

Nathan understood the question. He had wondered the same thing himself as he was learning these principles of human interaction from his grandad years ago. "It did kind of feel like that in the beginning, but over time it just became second nature. I don't even think about it, and I really do enjoy connecting with people and making them feel seen and heard, so I don't think it's manipulative. Not if you truly mean it."

"I don't think I could ever do that," Walter declared.

"I don't think you need to, Walter. You have your own kind of natural charm. A charm that comes from your complete and utter honesty in almost any situation. That connects you to people who value honesty. And I don't believe that you should attempt to change anything about yourself that feels inauthentic to you. Although given that your bluntness sometimes gets you into trouble, I just wanted you to know what works for me because I know that as a scientist you believe that there is value in incorporating new data into the existing paradigm. Maybe some of what I've told you could be useful. But mostly I told you that story so that you wouldn't feel like connecting with people was always so easy for me. I wanted you to understand that it was something I had to learn how to do. Something I actually had to practice. I don't ever want you to feel like we are in a competition with each other and certainly not like you are losing."

As much as Walter hated it, he felt a distinct sense of relief at Nathan's words. "I appreciate your willingness to be so open and honest and to share that part of your life with me. I know it's not always easy for a person to open up about the difficult parts of their past," Walter blinked rapidly.

Nathan studied him carefully for a few moments, leaving him space to open up as well if he felt ready to. When he saw the familiar shuttering of Walter's eyes and that no further information about Walter's difficult past would be forthcoming, he shrugged internally and simply moved a piece that sealed Walter's fate in their game of GO.

Walter immediately saw the inevitability of the loss. "Yeah, my mind hasn't really been on the game tonight. I haven't been much of a challenge."

Nathan chuckled. "I've been practicing my good sportsmanship, Nana would be proud of my self-restraint. No opportunity for bettering myself going to waste."

Walter started picking up the pieces and placing them methodically in the storage bags before putting the game board away.

Nathan glanced at his watch. "It's still early. Is there anything else you'd rather do? I'm game, it's been a while since we've hung out. But if you have a project you'd rather work on, I have a new Admiral Stavridis novel I've been waiting for the chance to read."

"I've missed spending time with you as well. How about we grab a couple of stacks of pancakes at Kovelsky's? I think I'd enjoy hearing more about what a terrible teenager you were for your grandparents."

Nathan laughed just a little uncomfortably. "Sure, but only if you spill the details on the terror that a young Walter O'Brien in an Irish farming village must have been."

Walter grimaced at the memory. He had been smarter than everyone in Callan and he made sure everyone there knew it. "That sounds like a suitable arrangement."

Nathan grabbed the keys to his truck and Walter locked up the Garage as the two men disappeared into the night, already chuckling and swapping ever more outlandish stories of who made life more unbearable for their families.


Author's Note:

I am thrilled to announce that the incomparable LouBe96 has returned as a beta reader for the remainder of this fic. She would like the reader to know that the blame for any typos or errors that may have slipped through should be placed on her and not on Masikka. Personally, I disagree, but this disclaimer is at her request, so what are you going to do?