Here we go with another chapter! What do you guys think so far?


I was sitting in my room with a bowl on the floor. Concentration was beading on my forehead as I stared at the shadow in front of me. My goal was to get to a point where I could control the shadows around me without needing to focus too much on in. Earlier in the day I had a conversation with our sensei.

"You have to feel the shadows around you at all times." Sensei Yaga said to me after class. My classmates had left the room and were off to go and relax for the evening before they had their additional training sessions.

"What does that even mean?" There was obvious frustration on my face as I ran my right hand through my hair.

"I know you're struggling, but you did it when you went on your latest mission, so we know you can do it." He encouraged me. With a sigh, I sat down on the ledge of the window with my arms crossed over my chest.

"I know you're frustrated, Tsu, but you're figuring it out. Why don't you explain to me how it felt when you used your shadow manipulation on the mission?" I reached back into my memory and instinctively opened and closed my right hand.

"It was like I felt the shadow in my hand, almost like it had become an extension of me. When I closed the shadow on the curse, it moved like it was my own hand grabbing it and squashing it in my hand." I opened my eyes and looked at my teacher who was pondering what I had said.

"Like you just said, you felt like it was an extension of you. With your cursed technique, your family has been able to feel the shadows of everything around them, but they struggle the most when it's dark because then there are more."

"You know about what my family can do?" I know the question sounded ridiculous because it was obvious that Sensei Yaga would know, but it was a topic that I never spoke to him about. In reality, I never spoke about my family with anyone – let alone our cursed technique because now people believed that we were as corrupted as someone's shadow can be.

"Yes, I trained with your father for a bit, but I've also heard a lot about it." It was silent in the classroom. The air became thick in the room, and it felt like it was almost too hard for me to breathe. "You know, Tsu, you have a very strong technique. You just need to be careful because-"

"Because we may become corrupted and end up being shamed. I know." I stated as I pushed off the window ledge and began to walk towards the door of the classroom. I was standing with the door open and was about to walk out of it until I stopped when he said,

"Your cursed technique will manifest what is truly inside of you and your core beliefs. Do not be afraid of it. If anyone is capable of change, it's you." My right hand twitched on the door, but I just gripped it harder.

"Thank you." Then, I left.

I shook my head to clear it of the memory from earlier in the afternoon. With a deep breath in through my nose and out my mouth, I re-centred myself in the room. I opened my right hand and had the palm pointed up to the ceiling. With the strength I could muster, I sent my cursed energy towards the shadow of the bowl in front of me. The feeling of the shadow began to appear in my palm. More concentration was being piled into that shadow until I felt the heaviness of the bowl in my hand. With that, I used my palm and made a swiping motion to the left and watched as the shadow curled around the bowl and shot it left – crashing against the wall.

A scream filled with excitement immediately left my lips as I jumped up to my feet and began pounding my fists in the air. I couldn't believe that I had managed to break the bowl after training for what felt like years.

Knock Knock

My movements stopped when I heard someone knock at my door. I walked over to it and opened it, to see that Shoko was standing in front of me with a cocked eyebrow, stick in her mouth and training clothes on.

"Tsu? Is everything okay?" She asked.

"Better than okay! Look!" I pointed to the smashed bowl on the floor and her confusion only intensified. "I broke it with my shadow manipulation!"

"That's amazing! Look at you!" She high-fived me at my door.

"I can't believe I did it. Wow. Now I just need to do it more often and get used to doing it. You know how Satoru can keep his limitless on all the time now? I want to be able to feel shadows like that and have control." I explained to Shoko.

"Oh, you're definitely going to get there. You're always training."

"I hope so." I sighed as I leaned against my door frame.

"Speaking of Satoru…" My interest immediately peaked at the mention of the white-haired boys name, but I kept my face neutral. "What was that the other day? When you came back from your mission with Suguru?" She asked me.

"What do you mean?" I asked back.

"The whole, 'I want to take her to the nurse' and not to mention the fact that he threw you over his shoulder?" She reminded me. The days after that incident, I did my best to try and not think about the physical contact Satoru and I had on that day. I definitely did my best to try and not think about how he smelt, how he looked into my eyes, or how if I was given the chance, I may have leaned up just to see how-

"I don't know! Maybe you should ask him about it. I mean, he was pretty cocky about it anyways, so I think he was only doing it to get another 'favour' out of me." I answered.

"I don't know about that, it looked more than just that. It almost looked like it was his ego was involved, but it was because he wanted to help you." Shoko looked at me with a smirk on her lips.

"No, I'm telling you, there was none of that. He likes to annoy me." I stated. My brown-haired friend in front of me shrugged her shoulders.

"I spend more time watching everyone and I can say that there was more to it than that, but whatever you say."

"Honestly, Shoko, I think you're just reading into it."

"Hey, I'm just asking the questions around here. I know that if there was anything, then you would tell me, right?" She questioned.

"Of course! We're friends."

I was sitting on my bed relaxing after another long day of training and studying. With a book in my hands, I was propped up against the wall that my bed was pushed against and was happily reading about the love story on the page. A pang of sadness and jealousy ran through me as I thought about how I never had that experience – I was nearly 16 years old and never been on a date, had a boyfriend, or had a kiss. A part of me always thought that there was something wrong with me, but then I would remember that no one will probably want to be with me because of my father. I sighed at the thought of being alone for the rest of my life, but I also knew that it was probably for the best.

I was taken out of my thoughts when my phone started vibrating on my desk. I knew it was late, so I ignored the vibration and waited for it to stop. When it stopped, I began reading again, but had to stopped when my phone rang again. Begrudgingly, I got out of bed and answered my phone.

"Tsu?"

"Yu?" I was confused as to why Yu was calling me so late.

"It's mom. She's in the hospital again." Her voice was shaking on the phone.

"I'm on my way. You wait at home with grandma." With that, I hung up the phone and quickly got changed into my sweatpants, a hoodie, and grabbed my backpack. I ran down the hallway of the dorm, down the stairs of the school, and towards the train station because I knew which hospital she would've been taken to.

"Tsu?" My eyelids slowly opened at the sound of my name. I took in a deep breath and felt how groggy I was, how my back was stiff from sleeping in a hospital chair, and how the bags under my eyes must have been huge. Yu and my grandmother were standing in front of me with concern on their faces.

"Hey, good morning." I spoke as I sat up in my chair and stretched my arms above my head.

"I'm happy you came." Yu said as she ran into my arms, wrapping hers around my neck and hiding her face against my shoulder. I wrapped my arms around her and patted her head,

"Of course. Good job for calling me when you did."

"What did the doctor say? What time did you get here?" My grandmother asked.

"I got here around 2am. They wouldn't let me in at first, said that I need to come back during visiting hours, but I convinced them otherwise. We're changing her medication again, but they hope this will stabilize her now." I answered.

"Oh darling, you've done well." My grandmother walked over to me and patted the top of my head.

"The doctor said that what will help her the most is her changing her lifestyle. Her depression doesn't help with her illness and the fact that she doesn't leave the house makes it worse because she's not actually doing anything. Since she psychologically has given up, then it's encouraging her body to do the same." I explained to my grandmother and Yu.

"I think we need to start getting her to come for walks outside the house." Yu said. I looked at her with a soft smile.

"I think that's a great start. Maybe we can convince her to go for a walk with you to the convenience store." I suggested.

"Does that mean I get a treat?" She bounced in her spot on my leg.

"Of course! I think grandma should go with you too, don't you think?" I looked at my grandmother.

"But, Tsu, the money-"

"Don't worry about that. I'll up the house allowance. I'll speak to Mei Mei about how she gets paid more when she goes on missions." I said. My grandmother looked at me with narrowed eyes, almost like she didn't quite believe me, but I had to believe in myself in that moment. I knew that if I didn't figure out how I was going to make more money, then my family would suffer.

"If anyone can do it, it's you, Tsu." Yu said to me. I smiled at her. Our conversation came to a stop when we heard my mother begin to stir next to us. All three of us looked towards the bed and saw my mother's eyes begin to slowly open. Yu got off my lap, so then I could stand next to her bed. She looked groggy and almost like she didn't know what she was doing there in the hospital.

"Where am I?" My mother asked us.

"You're in the hospital. You had a fall yesterday in the backyard. You were out there in the middle of the night. It's a good thing that I had gotten up and found you." Grandmother explained what happened during the night.

"I don't remember why I went into the backyard." She admitted.

"It's okay. We've decided that we're going to go on a walk together, all three of us." Yu sat on the edge of her bed and held onto her hand. Our mother looked at her with a confused look on her face.

"What about Tsu?" She asked about me. I was leaning against the windowsill, while my grandmother stood at the end of the bed with her hands on the frame, and Yu sat on the edge of the bed.

"I can't go because I'm in school." I answered. She looked at me with disappointment, but then looked back to Yu.

"Where shall we go for a walk?" She asked the 11-year-old.

"Tsu said we can go to the convenience store, and I can get a treat." Yu answered.

"Only if I can get some ice cream." My grandmother joked. The three of them spoke together before grandmother and Yu had to leave, so then Yu could get to school. I stayed at the hospital and waited for the doctor to come back for their morning rounds. Pacing around the room helped me when it came to my anxiety around the whole situation that I was dealing with. With my phone in my hand, I sent a quick text to Mei Mei about meeting up to learn how she gets so much money from her missions, and she replied saying that she would be fine with me meeting with her.

"Can you stop pacing please? It's making me anxious." My mother asked me.

"But it's helping with my anxiety." I replied.

"Please, come sit with me." My mother patted the bedsheet next to her. Reluctantly, I put my phone away and went to sit next to her. "Thank you for coming here, but you should go back to school."

"I can't. I want to speak to the doctor." I was truthful with my mother and the situation.

"Really, I can tell you what they say."

"To be honest with you, it would be better if I was here too. It'll put all of us at ease." I stated. My mother was silent for a minute as she looked at me with that blank stare, she would give me. I hated it when she looked at me like that because it always made me feel like she wasn't actually looking at me, but through me.

"Okay. I know that once your mind is made up, then I can't change it." She said. "You get that from your father."

"I think you can be pretty stubborn as well." I reminded her. She looked down at her hands in her lap before saying,

"You got me there." She said. We spoke for a little while longer while we waited for the doctor. He didn't come until midday, then we spoke about what we were going to do with my mother and her medication. After the conversation, we were finished around one o'clock in the afternoon. The nurse informed me that we could leave as soon as we were ready and that my mother's new prescription would be ready for pick-up at four at the local pharmacy. I sighed, there goes my whole day.

When we finished at the hospital, I got us both something to eat at the hospital cafeteria. Then, I got us a taxi and escorted my mother home. Once I settled her back in the house, I left to go and pick up her new prescription. Yu came back from school before I left, so I stayed around for dinner with my family. When I had a look at my phone, I noticed that I had several missed calls and unanswered text messages from my three classmates. There was a reminder that even though I felt like I was behind in the class, my friends cared about my wellbeing. However, I didn't know what I was going to say to them when I got back to school that evening.

With that, I made my way out of the house and headed towards the train station. I had a relaxing ride back to my school and the walk in the crisp night air helped to clear my head with the last day's events. As I made my way back to the school, I saw the flyers in the windows of the shops and remembered that the Asakusa Tori no Ichi festival was right around the corner. I made a mental note, so then I remembered that I needed to go to the shrine to say a prayer for my chaotic life.

When I arrived back at school, I stopped when I noticed three figures sitting on the top steps of their school. Saturo was leaning back on his elbows, his legs outstretched in front of him. Shoko was sitting next to him with her chin resting on her fist, with her eyes closed. Suguru was sitting next to Shoko, with his face in his hands. All three of them look tired, but my heart began to swell as I noticed they were waiting for me.

"You guys nearly look as tired as me." I joked as I walked up to them. With that, all three of them were on their feet and I was in the middle of a group hug.

"Where have you been all day? We've all been worried sick!" Shoko yelled at me after they all let go of me.

"If we text you and call you, you should really let one of us know that you're okay." Suguru told me.

"Thanks guys, but I was at the hospital. My mother was admitted last night, so I've been dealing with all of that since 2am." I explained to them the situation without telling them too much information.

"Why didn't you tell us? Is she okay?" Shoko asked me.

"Sorry, I've just had a lot on my plate, and I'm pretty used to dealing with this by myself." I explained. While I spoke, I could feel the eyes of a certain white-haired boy on me. I was slightly surprised that Satoru had nothing to say yet, but was even more confused when he put his hand out, palm facing up.

"Give me your bag." He said.

"It's okay, I can carry it." I told him, but when I turned my head to look at him, I could tell that there was no conversation around this situation, so I took off my backpack and handed it to him. With ease, he slung it over his shoulder.

"I think it's time we all get to bed." He said to all of us.

"Wow, who would've thought you were going to be the responsible one." Suguru teased.

"He is right. Come on, we can talk more in the morning." Shoko agreed with Satoru. With that, the four of us walked back to the dorms, so we could go to sleep. Satoru walked me to my door, waited for me to open it, and then placed my bag on the desk in my room. I collapsed onto my bed and sighed, finally feeling my body relax. However, Satoru didn't leave my room yet, so I sat back up on my elbows and looked at him.

"Thank you for carrying my bag." I thanked him. He pulled out a business card and handed it to me.

"This is Kenzo's number. If you ever need to get somewhere quickly or are coming back here late, call him." I looked down at the number on the card and back at the glasses wearing boy in front of me.

"Satoru…thank you, but I don't need this-"

"Please. Just take it. I'd like to know that you're safe if you're not going to tell us the whole truth." He said as he leaned against my desk. Those words went straight through my heart, and I felt a deep sense of guilt for not being completely forthcoming with information to my friends.

"I…"

"Tell me when you're ready, but just know that we all care about you and are here to help you. Just ask. Now, get some sleep. I'll see you in the morning." With that, he walked out of my room and closed the door behind him. I looked back down at the business card and for the first time in a long time, I cried because I actually felt like someone else in this world really saw me and cared about what they saw.


Oh well, isn't that sweet! Having someone who can see you is so important!