No. No. No no no no no no no. What was she saying? Why was she leaving? She couldn't leave! Behind his seemingly calm visage, Ajax's thoughts were running a mile a minute. Never in his life could he have imagined that Lumine was truly from another world. He knew that her brother was her single-minded objective, but why did she have to leave this world? A part of him understood her love for family but the rest of him was screaming in refusal. This was not how it was supposed to play out. Lumine was supposed to find her brother, they would all fight Celestia together, and then Ajax could tell her how he felt about her. If things worked out, he could be with her. Her leaving was not part of the plan.
His turmoil must have reflected on his face because he suddenly felt a small hand cover his own.
"Ajax?"
He saw her amber eyes focused on him, concern written in them. He opened his mouth to reply but nothing came. What could he even say after the selfish part of him had already spoken? Covering that up would take a series of lies he didn't have it in himself to tell. She had trusted him with her life and here he was, debating on whether or not to lie to her. The least he could do was be honest with her.
"I know it's selfish, but please don't leave. Stay here."
'Stay here with me. Please.'
"I have to find Aether and leave this world. We don't belong here. We've already stayed too long."
"Why will you need to leave? What is so pressing that you can't stay here? You do belong here!" 'With me.' He was grasping at straws.
"But I have to—"
He reached out to hold her by the shoulders, his grip firm but gentle.
"Just for once, put yourself first instead of what you have to do. Look at me and answer me this—what do you want?"
She was silent as she looked at him. He knew it was selfish of him to put her on the spot like this. He almost felt bad about manipulating her into this, but hey, he was kind of a bad guy anyway. Part of him was conflicted about the whole thing, knowing that he should let her go. She was a Traveler, first and foremost. She was meant to traverse worlds, touching lives wherever she went. He couldn't keep her here with him; she was not his to hoard. No matter what, he wanted her to be happy. He just wished that it could be with him. He took a deep breath and steeled himself.
"It's okay, forget I said—"
"I want to stay." Something like resolve shone in her eyes as she shifted closer to him. She put her hands atop his, where they rested on her shoulders. "I want to stay here with you."
"See, that's what I'm telling—"
"No, you don't understand. I want to stay here with you, Ajax."
His mind went blank. She couldn't possibly be saying what he thought she was saying, right? But the way she stressed 'you' was implying exactly that. She wanted to stay with him. She wanted to stay with HIM. Not her friends across nations, not the Archons, not Paimon, but him. (He knew that the rest of them played an equally important role in her choice but they could be put aside for now.) Did that mean he had a chance? Did they have a chance?
She suddenly shuffled backwards, causing his hands to drop from her shoulders. She looked down, her bangs obscuring her eyes.
"Sorry, I didn't—"
"Did you mean it?" The sudden urgency in his voice caused her to look up. She had a deer-in-the-headlights expression as she stared at him. "Lumine, did you mean it?"
Her answering nod was almost imperceptible.
He held her hands in his, brushing his thumbs over hers. "And what if I said that I want to stay with you too?"
He saw her eyes light up and a smile began to bloom before her face fell. Shock replaced happiness in seconds. "Ajax, I—you don't—I can't!" Desperation laced her words. "We can't!"
She was about to pull her hands away but his grip was firm. "Just for tonight, just between usâ"what if you could?"
Archons, he was a horrible person for doing this to her. He knew that this would hurt both of them but he couldn't help but want a taste of what it would be like.
"Our lives are too different. You're a Harbinger and I'm, well, me! This can't work."
"I can't claim to know the future. I don't know where our paths will lead us. Both of us have our own lives and our own responsibilities." He lifted one hand to brush his fingers against her cheek, lightly cradling her face. "What I can give you is right now. I'm here with you, and I'm not going anywhere. Right now, I'm all yours."
She leaned into his palm, bringing up her own hand to cup his. Her voice conveyed her hesitance. "Do you really mean it?"
"For tonight, let's just be Ajax and Lumine. No titles attached."
"Ajax and Lumine, huh?" Her lips curved into a soft smile.
"Let me treat you how you deserve to be treated. And know that you deserve the world." He shifted closer to her, to where she was almost on his lap. His other hand came to rest in the middle of her back. He began to slowly lean in but stopped when he felt her hands on his shoulders.
"Are you okay? Was that too much?"
"No, it's just that..." Her hands fisted his shirt. "I've never done this before."
He almost couldn't believe it. A girl as pretty as her, as loving as her, and she had never been approached by a guy? She didn't seem like the type to lie about it to stroke his ego, but his ego was definitely stroked.
"Good, because I'd hate to have to kill somebody for this." She huffed despite herself. "For the record, neither have I. So I guess we'll figure it out, that is, if you want to."
She looked up at him and leaned towards him. He took that as an indication to continue and closed the distance between them. Archons, her lips were so soft and warm. Her hands on his chest were sending warmth buzzing through him and he wanted more. His hand moved from her cheek to the back of her head, tangling in her short locks. He pulled her to him using his other arm. Her hands tightened on his shirt and one hand moved to hold his face.
He didn't know how long they kissed for, but at some point, they had gone from sitting to lying down. Things had gotten a bit handsy but neither of them seemed to mind. Soon, they had settled down with him holding her as she laid next to him. He was playing with her hair while she gazed at him.
"What will happen tomorrow, Ajax?"
"I don't know. Hopefully, the Tsaritsa will have some answers for you."
"And what about us?"
His hand stilled. He knew that he had selfishly asked her for a night but he didn't think any length of time would suffice. He could never get enough of Lumine.
"You'll always have me, girlie. I can promise you that. No matter what happens next, you'll have me." He pulled her closer, settling her against his chest. "Now, it's been a long day, and you need your rest. Time to sleep."
"Thank you, Ajax. Good night."
"Good night, Lumine."
She shifted into a comfortable position, snuggling against him. He continued stroking her hair, lulling her to sleep. Slowly, her breathing evened out and she was lost to her dreams. He looked at the goddess in his arms, scarcely able to believe how he got so lucky. He had only imagined being with her, and here she was, holding on to him. He'd do anything for her, including going to war with Celestia, if that's what she wanted. He wanted to spend the rest of his life with her, but not at the cost of holding her back. He knew that she couldn't abandon her brother. But, Archons, he wished that she could stay.
As he slowly drifted off, he hoped that she wouldn't realize that he never actually answered her question about them.
The next morning, Lumine woke up feeling oddly cold, despite the thick blanket tucked around her. She remembered falling asleep in Ajax's arms, but sometime during the night, he had moved from her bed into his own. She could see him curled up under his blanket on the extra bed. She got out of bed and pulled on the thick sweater that Ajax's mother had given her. ("You'll get cold, dear. Take this, we have too many anyway.") She padded over to him, her sock-clad feet sinking into the plush carpet. She smiled softly—he looked so innocent when he was asleep. He looked like a carefree young man instead of the violent Harbinger. His hair was even messier than it usually was and falling over his face, which was burrowed into his pillow. She almost reached out to brush it away from his eyes before she stopped herself. He was hers for a night, and the night had ended. Now, they were back in their roles and with their responsibilities.
Part of her wished she could rewind time to relive it over and over again. Last night, she was happy. She was at peace being close to him. It wasn't just physicalâ"they had talked all night long. She had told him everything about herself and he loved her for it. He did the same and had let down all his walls. Last night, it was as he said; they were Ajax and Lumine. Just a boy and a girl who loved each other without the conflict that surrounded them. Simple, almost innocent touches had depths of emotion behind them. Loving gazes conveyed what words could not. For one night, she saw what they could be. She also knew that the one night left her longing for so much more.
Breaking out of her reverie, she turned to go to the bathroom to freshen up for the day. They were to meet the Tsaritsa in the afternoon and she didn't know what to expect. Ajax had told her it was a diplomatic meeting and that she wouldn't be treated as an enemy but she was still on edge. After all, she had a reputation of foiling the Fatui's plans at every step. She was walking into the figurative vishap's den and she was walking into it alone. Ajax would be there with her but his allegiance ultimately lay with the Tsaritsa. She couldn't say what he'd do if it came down to a battle between her and the entire Fatui. She wanted to believe he would fight with her instead of against her, but she knew it was wishful thinking.
She finished getting ready and straightened the inteyvat in her hair as she took one last look in the mirror. She stepped out of the bathroom to find Ajax awake and arguing with Paimon.
"Paimon can't believe this. You're sleeping in even though you know it's an important day!"
"The meeting is in the afternoon and it's barely even nine o' clock! How is that sleeping in?"
"You're going to make us late!"
"Am not!"
"Cut it out, both of you. It's too early to deal with this. Paimon, it's not that late; we still have time. Ajax, go and get ready."
Ajax saluted her as he walked over to the bathroom. "Yes, Ma'am."
An hour later, all three of them had finished breakfast. Ajax had found a carriage and they were on the way to Zapolyarny Palace. Lumine was so busy looking outside at the bustling city that she didn't even realize when they reached the Palace. As they got out of the carriage, she could see the massive structure looming in front of her. It looked imposing with its tall spires and arches. In the daylight, one might think that it was made out of ice with the way the glass reflected the light. It contrasted with the dark stone that made up the majority of the building.
If the Palace itself was this intimidating, what was the Tsaritsa like?
"Come on, girlie." She saw Ajax standing a little ahead of her, in front of the tall mahogany doors. One hand was on the doors, the other hand was outstretched towards her, beckoning her. "You actually need to enter the Palace to meet the Tsaritsa." He pushed the doors and they swung open without a sound.
Flustered and nervous, she followed him inside. For the second time in so long, she was stunned. The interior of the Palace was beautiful. Crystal chandeliers hung from the ceiling like stalactites and the floor was polished white stone. She could almost see her reflection in it, if she focused enough. Glass sculptures decorated the sides and rich, deep blue curtains hung on the windows. In front of her was a tall, broad staircase, and Ajax was climbing it. At the top of the stairs, he turned left and began walking down a long corridor. A right and another staircase, and she hurried to follow him; his stride was longer than hers. The place was a maze and she was sure she couldn't make her way out of it without him to guide her.
After what seemed like endless walking, he stopped and turned to face her.
"At the end of this corridor is the throne room. I'll go ahead and you can enter after me. The Tsaritsa will be on her throne. She's one for etiquette but I know you'll manage. Try not to cause an incident, though." He chuckled to himself before sobering up. "One more thing: once inside, I will be Tartaglia. I will be there to support you, but not in the way a friend would." He reached out, almost as if to stroke her cheek but stopped, his hand falling back to his side. "I want you to know that it's a persona I have to wear, even if I'd rather not. I want to be there for you—with you—but Ajax has no place there. However, I can promise you one thing—" He held out his hand, pinkie extended. "If it comes down to it, I will not raise my blade against you. I may not be able to oppose the Harbingers, but I will not oppose you."
She looked at him but didn't take his pinkie. "I can't ask you to do that. You are still a Harbinger and you are still sworn to your Tsaritsa. I will not make you break that." She gave him a lukewarm smile. "Besides, I've caused enough diplomatic incidents to be able to handle myself."
He looked at her intently before lowering his hand and nodding. "Alright, girlie—here goes."
He pushed the door open and walked in.
Tartaglia quickly scanned the surroundings as he walked to the front of the room. All the Harbingers were present. (The last time he remembered such an assembly was when Signora had been killed. His colleagues weren't much for socializing.) Things could get very bad very quickly if this meeting went downhill. He had total faith in Lumine's skills, but he didn't want her to face nine Harbingers. Luckily though, it was just them and Tsaritsa herself. None of the other members of the Fatui were present. Good, this meeting did not need an audience. He wanted this to be resolved as calmly as possible, and that was coming from him—the battle-crazy maniac.
"Good afternoon, Your Majesty." He knelt in front of the Tsaritsa's throne. "I have brought the Traveler to meet you, as you asked me to. With your permission, may she enter?"
"She may. Call her in."
He turned to watch the door open behind him. Lumine entered the room, wary but not timid. She slowly approached him and the Tsaritsa, and he could read that she was on full alert. She stopped a little behind him and sank into a full curtsy.
"Your Majesty. Thank you for granting me this audience."
The Tsaritsa's face was stone, blank and immovable. He couldn't tell what she was thinking, but she didn't seem to be displeased. He bowed, taking his leave, and moved to stand in his position along the side. He was farther from Lumine than he wanted to be, but being the Eleventh meant he was right at the end. He could do nothing but watch.
"Rise, Traveler. I have heard about your travels and your adventures, much of it from my own subjects. You seem to have a knack for running into them." Owch. Tartaglia could feel that bite all the way over from where he stood. "However, that alone will not suffice. I want to hear it from you. Why are you traveling through Teyvat? What is your purpose? And what made you come here?"
He watched as Lumine began her tale. She gave the sovereign a heavily-cut version of the tale she had told him last night. She was looking for her brother and for the god who had taken away her powers. She wanted to meet the Archons to find any leads that she could. She mentioned that her brother may have been corrupted by the Abyss, but left out the part about him being the Abyss Prince. She spoke for a long time before finally concluding her account.
"That's what brings me here, Your Majesty. I just want to find my brother and I come to you with the hope that you may be able to help me."
"Oh? You seek my help after hindering my purpose?"
He saw Lumine's hands fist for a moment before relaxing. "Your Majesty, my intention was never to hinder you. My intention was only to protect those I called friends."
He suppressed a smile. This woman surprised him at every turn. With how little she spoke, no one would take her to be such a diplomat.
"You would call the Archons your friends? You, who have been here for a fraction of our lives? You, who has seen nothing of the world we have protected for years?"
"I may not have experienced this world for as long as you have, and I do not claim to know what the Archons feel. All I know is that each of them has aided me and I have aided them, in whatever way I could. I wish them well and I hope they do the same for me. I call them friends because of all that I have experienced with them, even though it pales in comparison to all that they have experienced."
'Well played, girlie. Well played.'
The Tsaritsa leaned back on her throne, staring down at Lumine. He was too far away to make out her expression. Lumine had her back to him but he could guess that she was matching the Tsaritsa's gaze. She wasn't one to be cowed so easily.
After a long silence, the Tsaritsa spoke.
"You have my respect for defending those you hold dear. Bonds are something I understand better than the rest of the Seven. Having said that, I ask you—what do you think my purpose is for collecting the Gnoses of my dear friends?"
Lumine paused before she spoke. "Your Majesty, I have limited knowledge of the Gnoses and their role, other than the fact that they are the symbol of an Archon's authority. I don't know your reasons for collecting them. I was assured by one of your own that you do not intend to bring any harm to Teyvat."
"You are correct—Gnoses symbolize an Archon's authority. Celestia created the Gnoses as a means of leashing the gods. They have since created the rules and we are meant to follow them. But who is to say these rules are just? You have seen this with Egeria and Focalors. They paid the price for allowing humanity to thrive. Morax lost everyone he cared for because of the Archon War that the Heavenly Principles instigated. And I... Let's just say that I have learnt that love can hurt."
The Tsaritsa held out her hand and the seven Gnoses materialized in front of her, floating in a ring.
"Even though they have been separated from their owners, they still hold immense power in a god's hands. I intend to harness that power. I plan to destroy the Heavenly Principles themselves. No longer will Teyvat suffer under their reign."
Silence fell. Tartaglia could feel the shock that permeated the room. Apart from him, Arlecchino, and, unsurprisingly, Pierro, he could gather that no one had known about the Tsaritsa's plan. Bring down Celestia itself? That was a tall order, even for the strongest military on the continent. What he still didn't understand was how they were supposed to do it.
"I have my Harbingers. I have the Gnoses. The rest of the Seven may or may not join me. All that remains is you. You are the most unexpected player in all of this. So, tell me, Traveler, are you with me or against me? There is no other side."
His breath caught. This was it; this was the moment when things fell in place or fell apart. He didn't know what Lumine would say. He didn't know how the Harbingers would react no matter what she said. He just hoped that things wouldn't go out of control. However, before he could think more on this, Lumine spoke.
"Your Majesty, my enemy is the god who abducted my brother—the sustainer of the Heavenly Principles. I will have my revenge and I will get my powers back, war or no war. I have nothing against you, and I will not stand in your way. My only concern is how this will affect the rest of Teyvat. I do not wish for more innocents to be caught in this strife." He saw her take a deep breath and straighten herself. "However, I want to make one thing clear—I still oppose the Fatui's designs on Teyvat. I do not agree with their underhanded methods, and I particularly do not agree with their invasive tendencies. I hope that Your Majesty will understand."
Archons, this woman was bold. To tell the Tsaritsa herself that she would keep fighting the Fatui on Teyvat, even if she assisted the Harbingers against Celestia. If he wasn't already in love with her, he would have fallen for her then and there.
Privately, Lumine felt this meeting was going rather well. No one had attacked her so far—that had to count for something, right? She wasn't one to shy away for fear of retaliation but she was treading carefully all the same. There was nothing to be gained from antagonizing the Tsaritsa. However, that did not mean she was going to agree to everything. She was clear about her boundaries and intended to stick to them. If that upset the Archon, so be it.
"Your audacity is astounding. Not many have the courage to negotiate with an Archon. However, I understand. You do not need to agree with the Fatui. I do not care for your petty squabbles. As long as you oppose Celestia, it is sufficient."
"Then I believe we have an agreement, Your Majesty."
"Good. That is all, unless you have something else to say?"
"I have a question. The Abyss Order seeks to destroy Celestia as well. Will you ally with them?"
She needed to know. Would she be with Aether or against him? If they both got their old powers back, she was the only one who could stand against him. Even without her powers, she knew Aether in and out, including how to fight him. Much as she did not want to oppose him, she knew that she would fight if she had to. She meant what she said about Teyvat not suffering the fallout of the war. The Abyss Order's intentions did not seem to spare a thought for Teyvat. They were the true complement to Celestia, with neither of them having any concern for what they did to Teyvat, as long as their own ends were served.
"I do not intend to. I disagree with the Abyss Order's methods. My war is with Celestia, not Teyvat. However, if they choose to make things easier for us, all the better."
"I understand. Thank you, Your Majesty."
The Tsaritsa inclined her head in acknowledgment. "I will need your assistance once we are prepared for war. Until then, you are dismissed. Tartaglia, escort our guest back to her lodgings."
Lumine felt more than saw him come up behind her. "Of course, Your Majesty."
She curtsied to the Tsaritsa once more, and then turned to leave the hall. She was silent as she followed Tartaglia through the maze of corridors. Once they were outside the Palace, she heaved a sigh of relief. She spoke to the Tsaritsa and got out of it without having to draw her blade. If that wasn't an achievement, she didn't know what was. From the look on her companion's face, he seemed to agree. He had a small smile on his face as he looked at her.
"Well, girlie, that went rather smoothly."
"To be honest, I had no idea what I was doing."
"You managed to meet with the Tsaritsa, in a hall full of Harbingers, and walked out of there without causing an incident. I'm proud of you. Now, what next?"
"I don't know. I'll probably explore Snezhnaya a bit more, the same as the other nations. With my luck, I'll manage to get drawn into some or the other problem that needs solving."
He chuckled. "While I'm glad to see your foresight, I meant what you want to do right now. We still have the day ahead of us."
She went pink, and it wasn't entirely due to the chill in the air. "I don't know. I didn't think of anything beyond this meeting."
"Well then, girlie, allow me to show you around. I know a place that has great food and then, we can walk around for a while before going back to the hotel for the night."
For the rest of the day, she let herself be dragged around by the Harbinger. He showed her the city the way a local would, pointing out different shops and people, with stories attached to each one. He bought them lunch and then, later, street snacks. It was surprising to see people be at ease with a Harbinger roaming in their midst. They smiled at him and chatted with him. Some store owners greeted him the way they would an old customer, with none of the restraint she saw in other nations. It made sense that Snezhnayans didn't have the same fear of the Fatui that other nations did. That smile and welcoming nature was extended to her the moment he introduced her as his friend. One lady even gave her free snacks because "it's so nice to see Tartaglia with a friend." It made Lumine wonder if the warmth stemmed from a lack of fear of the Fatui or from the fact that it was this particular member of the Fatui. Said member was engrossed in asking the lady about her children. If anyone else were to hear that the Eleventh Harbinger wanted to know how little Jozef's studies were going, they wouldn't believe it.
When the day was done, all Lumine wanted to do was collapse on the bed. Paimon had already disappeared into her dimension to rest, leaving just her and Tartagliaâ"Ajax. He was setting up his bed, although he did not seem to be as exhausted as her. She supposed the stress of meeting the Tsaritsa had tired her out more than she expected. However, she still didn't know where things would go. What would happen with Celestia? Would she find Aether? What would she do then? There were too many things that she didn't know.
"Well, girlie, time to sleep. Your exhaustion is written all over your face."
She looked at him, studying him. Today had been exhausting, but she had enjoyed touring the city with him. Even while she was speaking with the Tsaritsa, she had felt a sense of comfort knowing that he was in the room, supporting her. He made life a little bit brighter just by being there. She was grateful to have him.
"Hey, Ajax?"
"Mhmm?"
"Thanks for being there."
Surprise flitted across his face for a second before he smiled at her. "Anytime, girlie. Like I said, you'll always have me."
Her mind flashed back to last night, when he spoke the same words to her. That was the thing, though—she wouldn't have him. She couldn't have him, at least not in the way she wanted to. Their paths were too different. Pushing her thoughts aside, she climbed into bed and pulled the covers over herself.
"Goodnight, Ajax."
"Goodnight, Lumine."
