I slowly made my way into the choir room on Thursday, oh how I looked forward to the day I could go to school without crutches and walk in the speed I wanted. Jonah was right behind me, and we both greeted Moa who sat on one of the chairs, but when she looked up we both saw that her eyes were red, filled with tears and her cheeks were swollen and tear- stained.
"Are you okay Moa?" I asked even if it was pretty clear to me that she wasn't. She shrugged and looked to the floor. I slowly made my way over to her before more falling than sitting down on a chair next to her while Jonah sat down in front of us in the bottom row. "Hey." I said comforting. "What's wrong?" Moa just shrugged. "Well, if you want to talk I'm here for you." She nodded and then looked up to me.
"Do you remember how I told you I had a boyfriend- and that my best friend's name is Alva? Well the thing is- Victor- my boyfriend- my ex- he's got a sister named Vera- and Vera and her gang and me and Alva and the others were like… worst enemies. And… I was talking on the phone to Victor and Alva yesterday- you know with one of these three- people calls and… and it turns out Alva has kind of joined Vera's gang because she had this fight with Linnéa, Hannah and Jessica and then Vera has kind of talked with Victor into breaking up with me and then Alva helped her so- both Alva and Victor kind of… broke up with me. And they don't want to hear anything from me ever again."
Moa sighed when the others started gathering and before I'd have the time to say anything else she had stood up and went over to Mr. Schue, then she went to sit by the piano, gave Brad some notes and then jumped up to sit on the piano while the others were still gathering and at last- when we were all there Mr. Schue said a few words, and without another word about what had happened Brad started playing and Moa started singing.
Moa POV
Yesterday, when I was walking home was when I was talking to Victor and Alva. And I had walked through the park and sat down on a bench when the call had been finished. Sat there for a while- of course with too little clothes on- without gloves and cap- with wet hair after P.E. Class it quickly got too cold- and with someone who's grown up in Kiruna- north of Sweden- that meant something.
But yet I didn't move from that spot for almost an hour. I just sat there and watched the leaves falling from the trees and onto the ground. In the middle of the rain and the wind I just sat there. Until mum called and told me to pick up Nils that was. But everything from after that was just a blur.
It felt like yesterday, yet it had been about a year and a half since dad started talking about moving to America. I just brushed it off at first, until I started realizing that it was for real- and not just another one of his ideas that would never become reality anyway. But why did just this have to become reality?
I had started off with actually thinking it was a good idea. I had always been a top student- especially in English so I thought it would be fun to move somewhere where I actually could have some use for it. But after some while I started realizing it was for real I started thinking realistic- I'd leave my friends, my school, my town, my language- my country. For a place I'd never seen- let alone ever been to before.
All the afternoon and evening I sat in my room with my elbow on my desk and my chin in my hand. Staring out the window- I had looked out on the road and the trees outside. It had started raining more and the drops were pattering towards the glass. Just like tears were falling from my eyes down at my desk and on my shirt the raining was falling outside only more and more.
Why did I have to move? Why did it all have to end like that? I and Victor had promised each other we'd make it work so why did all have to end just like that? Why did he have to give up so fast when I had decided to give my all to make it work? And why would they both have had to leave me both at once?
But if it was one thing I had learned from the last few months it was that this was a big world. And I'm just one. Just one ordinary teenage girl from the north living in a whole new country- things like these happened every day. Couples got together, fought, made up, made out and then it happened that they broke up.
So maybe this was just a very little problem. I was just one in a billions of people- in a city that had only a couple of millions less people than whole Sweden- my problems were just tiny in this huge world because I was just one- and I was nothing special. Yet I knew that to me the problems seemed huge and I knew that I missed Alva and Victor so much it felt as if my heart would break.
Tonight I gad tossed and turned for hours, and then when I fell asleep I had a dream about Victor. I dreamed that he held me and he felt so warm. I felt so safe right there in his arms, with his breath blowing in my hair and I felt so good.
And then I woke up. And he wasn't there. Instead I had wrapped myself into my covers and my blanket so much it took me a long while to get it all off and throw it all off my bed and then I had bursted out crying worse than ever and mum woke up from the sound and came in.
Mum had without a word said in between us sat down by me, pulled me up in her lap and then just held me like that. Shushing gently and stroking my hair just like she used to do when I was little. Then we had been talking about what had happened- and I mentioned that I was such a baby.
But she didn't agree on that, she said I wasn't the first, neither the last. And this was going to hurt- but it was going to get better. But for now- we would only have to let it hurt and let me miss. Let my heart break and then just work myself up again- with her by my side of course- because there was no way she was leaving me.
Leah POV
Moa stopped singing, then she jumped down from the piano and stormed out of the room. The room fell silent for several minutes and then Mr. Schue stood up and looked around. "Is there anyone else who have got a number for this week?" It fell silent. "Okay guys, well… Next week is the start of duet- competition, this year I will decide the couples and I will put them all together for a reason. There is one girl and one boy in each couple. And it will continue for three weeks. I will decide the couples today and you will all hear them on Tuesday. Okay, off you go."
I took the crutches and slowly made my way out in the hallway again, when I came out to the porch steps I spotted Moa a bit away where she sat on a bench and looked away- seeming to be in a whole other word. "Wait here Jonah." I said. "I'll just go talk to Moa for a bit." I made my way over to her and sat down by her. "Hey… I'm really sorry for what happened… if you want to talk I'm here for you… this weekend I and Lex are having a sleepover at mine…. Do you want to come… we can talk trash about guys…"
Moa laughed but shook her head. "Thanks but no thanks. Maybe another time. Can I just be alone for now." I nodded, said goodbye to Moa for the day and then walked back to Jonah and now also dad. The whole ride home I just sat with a notebook on my lap gathering ideas for the sleepover at Saturday.
Mr. Schue POV
About two hours after glee had ended for the day I still sat with the names of everyone in the glee club, to the left laid some paper- pieces where I had written up all the names of the girls, Leah, Moa, Lex, Anna, Amy, Teeghan, Caroline, Alice and Marcie and on the other pieces with all the boys' names, Tyler, Rafaél, Connor, Aiden, Jasper, Jonah, Ben, Sean and Johnny- and I had no clue of who to put with who and why.
"Mr. Schue?" I heard a knock on the door and Jasper leaned inside. His hair was wet and he was wearing different clothes no then before so I could guess that he had been out in the gym and therefore stayed here for a few extra hours. I greeted him and sat up fully while he came and sat down on the other side of my desk.
"Listen Mr. Schue- I don't think you've missed it because it's pretty obvious. But Aiden's- you know- really in love with this Caroline. But he won't say anything to her- you know how he is. So please don't put Aiden and Caroline together- if you put me with Caroline I will find a way to find out if Caroline feels the same way about Aiden as he does about her." I smiled, hesitated, then moved two of the paper- pieces.
Caroline Landon- Jasper Gota
"Oh and as well, Tyler was in the gym too. He wanted to speak with you about some pairing too so you might expect him to come kind of… now." Just as Jasper had said that I saw Tyler come down the hallway towards my office, Jasper said good evening and then left the room and then Tyler came in.
"Hello Tyler." I said. "What can I do for you?" Tyler hesitated but then came and sat down just where Jasper had been sitting a minute ago.
"Listen Mr. Schue- Connor is my best friend, but there is something going on between him and this Leah. And he's not giving her a chance to explain what she really meant when he took it as if she was being homophobic- you know what Connor's like with that. So maybe it would be a good idea to put them together so Connor won't have any way to get out of that Leah will have to say what she really meant."
I agreed with Tyler- there had been something going on with Leah and Connor and Connor wasn't giving Leah a chance to explain. So I barely hesitated before moving two other pieces "Two down, seven to go" I exclaimed while I moved them.
Leah Carmichael- Connor Atkins
"Also… I know maybe that would be the best plan for you but please, please, please don't put me and Teeghan together. So well… that was everything I had to say. I need to go now." Tyler stood up, waved and then left the room. I smiled- yeah- maybe that would be the best option- and then I moved two of the other pieces.
Teeghan Knight- Tyler Benton
Oh… there's going to be loads and loads and loads of drama with the duet- weeks. Don't worry I've got a plan. And it's going to be so great to write about.
So… well, what more is there to say? I need tips on Christmas presents for this story "looking at you with puppy eyes" anything?
Playlist
Moa- Big, big world- Emilia
