Happy new year! Or gott nytt år as I usually say. I hope you've all had a merry Christmas. As I'm writing this, I'm a bit over an hour into 2024. So I hope everyone has a nice year.

And as usual I start this year with working on each of my stories.

This is the last chapter I'm starting… It's taking me forever and watching so many episodes of Ghost Whisperer.

"So I've been showing some of you some of the songs I like." Moa explained to all of us in the beginning of Tuesday's glee club rehearsal. "None of them are new songs, for some reason. But I just remembered them for a reason or the other and I pieced it together with some of you…. So, to begin with… I don't know. Would anyone like to start?"

Moa looked around and on all of us, but the first one was Aiden- pulling Caroline with him and facing us.

"I and Caroline were just scrolling through some titles and found some that seemed good. With it, I and Caroline here have each that we have no idea what they're about. So now, ladies first!"

Caroline didn't look as if she wanted to go first, but Aiden had already left her be and went to sit down. So it was either that or running away- which for some reason she hadn't done once despite being as shy as she was. She just looked back on Brad for a couple of seconds.

"Well… I hope I'm going to remember these lyrics while singing it. Because I sang it over and over again last night but… I guess it's time then."

Brad started playing and Caroline started singing. Of course I didn't understand enough to even tell one word from the other, but it didn't seem Caroline forgot anything because the music just continued.

I had Moa next to me and she too seemed as good as put on a spell. If I hadn't known any better I would have expected that she had dreamed away or fallen asleep despite the music. But all I could see was that she was staring at Caroline and obviously understanding more than what I or any of us others had done. Which would probably be what the rest of this week would be about.

"I hope yours and Aiden's relationship isn't like the one the song is about…" was the first thing she said. "Because well done- but it's about a song that is ending a relationship. Or… how should I explain? It's told from the point of view of some relationship that's ended, but waiting forever for someone to return to it… Am I even making any sense?"

"You are!" Caroline leaned her head to the side as if thinking deeply. "What is the text?"

"It's about… it's from the point of view of a love that's ended… when all the candles have burned out, and all dreams are over then where are you? I'm searching everywhere and forever for a love I know will return… It's quite beautiful now I'm translating it… Creative if nothing else… And the woman who sings it- both here…" Caroline blushed. "…and originally. They do have beautiful voices and yeah. I do think that's all there is to say. I'm just so excited for all songs this week. Aiden? You had one too, right?"

Aiden did have one too, he got up and kissed Caroline on the cheek before he got down on the floor by the piano. He looked over the people he had in front of him before he hesitated some.

"If it's okay I'd rather take this song in the auditorium."

"Well… I guess that would be okay, does anyone else want to do a song today? If you'd rather do a song in here then we might want to start with that?"

"I have one song." Johnny said after only a second of hesitating. "But I think that one too will be better in the auditorium."

We all took our things without Mr. Schue having to tell us what we were doing. I was with Moa and couldn't help to feel excited. Moa was the only one of us who knew the language but I always had a way with listening to songs which lyrics that I just couldn't understand. And just like Moa had said, the one for Caroline's had been creative and beautiful.

Aiden did have another voice and another way with singing, just like Johnny did. But Aiden was the one who didn't let wait for it while we others sat down and watched him.

I was still next to Moa, but in the dark of the auditorium it wasn't possible to see her reaction. There was something else in this one though. And it wasn't just about that Aiden was male and Caroline female…

But it was fun watching Aiden. He was obviously all into the music moving his whole body to the rhythm…

"Aiden?" The last tone had barely ran out before Moa spoke. "Did you really look up what this title meant?" Aiden shook his head. "That's what I thought…"

"So…" Aiden himself was smirking and obviously thought he had done something funny like a little kid. "What does it mean?"

"It means… the monkey that looks like you. That song… I think it's about drugs."

Aiden snorted with laughter while he handed the microphone to Johnny and Moa kept explaining at more laughing kept spreading around the room.

"It's not… like, it's not obvious. But the song- it's from the point of view of the drugs- when you're on me then I make you the monkey that still looks the same. It's a bit complicated really. But that's what it's about."

Aiden kept laughing, but left the stage for Johnny who kept more quiet and serious. I first had an idea that maybe, if the song was about drugs. Maybe he had- now or had had before something about drugs. Maybe someone he knew had had an overdose or he had been stuck… He didn't look happy anyway.

How could I be so wrong?

"I… well, as we probably all know I'm a senior now. And we're almost at the end of the school year. And I'm planning- and my dad's pretty much been planning since the day I was born that when I graduated high school then I'll be joining the army. So… I guess the only thing to do is to do the song… well, Brad?"

There were some kind of tension in the air while Johnny made his song. I tried to see Moa but it didn't seem she had reacted at all. I couldn't blame her. No one in my family had ever joined the army and it had always broken my heart that people did. And broke my heart even more that people all around saw it as something to be proud of.

It seemed that Johnny's song lasted forever. And for for sure almost two minutes the whole auditorium was silent enough that if someone dropped a nail we could have heard it fall to the floor.

"Thank you…" Johnny was at last about to leave the stage. "...well…. Look everyone. I'm not planning to join the army tomorrow. Or the same day as I graduate. I just need to think… deeply. All the way until when I graduate and… whatever happens will happen… I have to talk to more people… I don't think anyone here has got…"

"We have one." Marcie interrupted. "And I know I'm a girl. But my dad's in the army. Now, that's nothing I can recommend… to be at home. Waiting. Not knowing if I'd ever see my dad again and going sometimes more than a year before we meet him again. Never knowing if he'd be back… no… I can't recommend it. Not a single little day of it."

It was obvious that wasn't a point of view Johnny wanted to hear.

"I just… my dad. I mean. He can't be in the army anymore because he hurt himself years ago… so now I am…."

'"And how did he hurt himself?"

It didn't seem Johnny wanted to answer Marcie's question. But while I couldn't see her face from where I sat Johnny must have.

"Army."

"Exactly. Well, I'm the only one here who have a family member that used to be in the army. If you'd ask one of my dad or my mum I'm sure you'd get other answers but no. Not from me and I can't be proud of it."

It seemed the whole room had gone quiet once again. Now everyone knew Johnny and Marcie's ideas about this. We also knew that none of the others liked the other's. And we also all knew it made Alice upset what her boyfriend wanted, even though she was trying to hide it.

"It's actually kind of strange…" Moa said slowly. "…being in the army is not a big deal in Sweden. Or really, anywhere else except for America. But anyway, from one thing to the other, it's Johnny… which one of you others are seniors?"

"There's me and Johnny" Tyler answered. "Teeghan, Connor and Alice."

"Well, can all seniors stay here for just a minute. I have an idea about a song you should do. Don't worry. I have nothing more about the army."

I took my backpack to leave, while so did the rest except for the group of seniors. And the thought passed me by about how close Jonah had been to make it through high school. And I couldn't help but wonder what he'd have wanted if he had. Would he have liked to study a college for medicine to find a cure for CMS? Or would he have been relieved with no more school and taken some time off? Of course I couldn't have Jonah there for an answer, but I turned to Lex who could probably have some answer at least. But she seemed down somehow too.

"Are you okay?" I asked. "You seem a bit hurt…" I tried to remember what had been said last- "Is it about that Tyler will be graduating after this year ends?"

"Yes." She answered me a bit shakily. "You know… Since I joined New Directions in the beginning of my sophomore year, last year. And I and Tyler won a dinner at Breadstix as a duet and… There's just been so much. Things have changed so much and both at school and privately, Tyler has been there for me so much. A lot more than I should have expected him to. But then, I guess I just haven't been by thinking about that next year will be without him here. And he wants to go to college which will be miles and miles away. It's like… I just can't imagine my life without Tyler. And I know that's what anyone thinks about a girlfriend or boyfriend but…. But… I just love him so much. And it's like ever since we met the first time at my audition, I've just known that he'd be by my side for the rest of our lives."

"Lex… Come on! I don't know if you can see it, but anyone who's not completely blind when you two are together can see how much Tyler loves you. And it won't matter if you're here or in Sweden or anywhere, feelings don't go away with time or distance… So… believe me! You wouldn't get rid of Tyler if you so wanted to." Lex had a couple of tears run down her cheeks but wiped them away with her hand.

"Tomorrow is Moa's birthday… but then… there's got to be some Swedish song that fits this."

Playlist

Caroline: Som stormen- Sara Löfgren (Such as the storm)
Aiden: En apa som liknar dig- Darin Zanyar (cover. Originally by Olle Ljungström. A monkey that looks like you)
Johnny: När vindarna viskar mitt namn- Roger Pontare (When the winds are calling my name. But there's an English version called when spirits are calling my name)

Random fact

I didn't have any idea or plans of using that last song and/ or the army. I was just listening to some music on Spotify and the song played randomly.